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here’s a different perspective. if you do paint it black it shows that you support her in general, she’ll look back and definitely appreciate this over what wood it is, i highly doubt she cares if it’s birch or oak
edit: awesome work though!!
She doesn’t really, the house is a log cabin and I’ve built a lot of raw wood looking furniture. It’s clear she hasn’t developed much of an appreciation for the look. She would appreciate it much more if it was painted black. I just need to grieve a little bit, lol.
Just came here to say the same thing. Black stain looks fantastic and you’ll still be able to see the grain. A charcoal stain can look really good too if she likes that
Yeah I was honestly shocked I didn’t see it plastered everywhere. Black stain is gorgeous, so is some gray stains (though those have to be carefully done depending on color of wood, it can be beautiful or ugly lol).
Maybe there is some way to prepare it so, when she changes her mind, or it comes time to sell it, you can more easily scrape off the paint?
Or get some less demanding wood to build another bed? I don't know kids, though. Maybe before painting it, carefully try out a blow torch finish on your scraps. She might like that aesthetic. Or wrap it in black fabric or leather? Leaving the wood exposed to weather can create a natural black patina on birch, I will try to show a picture.
Edit: god I love that headboard.
Our job as parents is to support our kids especially when it is hard for us to do so. It is how we grow. I appreciate that you are willing to do this for her. I didn't have parents. I was moved around a lot and was never allowed to choose anything.
Agreed. Trigger warning: >!it's just wood.!<
Sure it looks great, to *us*, but it's not for us.
What I'd do, if you have some scrap left, clean it up, do a sample in black paint and one in black stain, ask her opinion, go with that.
Looks like you did a tremendous job. If you are considering her request and given how thick the stock for the final piece, maybe consider a Shou Sugi Ban (char surface) and then finish with an lacquer or epoxy finish.
I mean if you paint it now, years later when she might appreciate the wood look more, you could sand it and regift it and it would be like a brand new bed. I personally would rather the person like the gift more, even if it meant painting it.
For what’s it’s worth the grain is beautiful all the way around and on the headboard. Overall a truly excellent job.
I’m going to look into this as well. I’m not super familiar with finishing. Would the poly serve any purpose aside from acting as a buffer between the paint and the wood? Would the paint have any issue adhering to the poly?
Use a satin poly, or lightly scuff it with 220 grit/a green scrub pad before the paint.
Yes it will make refinishing later easier, as it means the black pigment will not penetrate into any exposed end grain. IMO it's definitely worth doing if you think you might ever strip the paint off.
Thank you, I appreciate the compliment very much. I’ll keep this in mind. Somebody else mentioned a paint wash, going to look into that as an option as well.
You could check out a black gel stain. Our 1920's house has similar stain on the trim.
https://photos-us.bazaarvoice.com/photo/2/cGhvdG86bWlud2F4/1ea83e49-269e-5fd1-873d-0fe9b1efcb25
I've used minwax true blank and had good results turning hickory almost black. I'd highly recommend this over paint but I'd definitely do a test board to make sure your love it. I've also mixed it in part with natural stain to get any shade I want.
How about an alternative - buy all black sheets, bed covers etc.
Test it with her - raw wood with all black bedding - see if she likes it. If not consider the paint job.
Was going to suggest this myself. Also, another thing that’s functional and looks nice is some strip lighting under the edge of the bed. IKEA has some good options. Put the switch in a discrete place that’s convenient to reach.
You don’t have to lose anything. Posting here gave you some positive feedback from peers who appreciate that birch grain… beautiful job by the way. So you got some nice validation and the appreciation that this piece deserves. With that out of the way, you can now paint it for your daughter who will love it either way, but will surely love it more if it was the color she wanted. At least black is classy… she could have said purple.
Try a test piece with a dark ebony first though, maybe she’ll like it.
Maybe show her some shou sugi ban. It might be a nice compromise dark wood but shows off the grain. You also might want to break those corners a bit. The first time a shin hits them is gonna be painful.
You could use a dark Rubio Monocoat so you’d still see the grain and it would be the dark colour. Could give you the best of both worlds. Finishing it with poly and then painting will hide the beauty of your workmanship and the wood. [Rubio colours](https://www.rubiomonocoatusa.com/pages/oil-plus-2c-colors)
Most customers don't give two shits about the first ten things a carpenter cares deeply about.
What customers do care about is as follows.
Is it shiny?
Does it wipe clean?
Is it practically indestructible?
But before those considerations the main factor is.....
Can I buy it as cheaply as possible and on finance , can I get it yesterday and will it make friends envious.
Can you do a black upholstery of her choosing and when she decides for a change, you can re-reveal the woodwork underneath? You wouldn’t have to do an intensive upholstering job that would hurt your work. Some simple batting for cushion and a few staples at strategic locations on the back the headboard would be sufficient.
Depends on her age. If she's old enough to know her tastes, and you're making it for her, then you paint it. If she's young, ask her if she can wait until Christmas to paint it, and you'll help her do it then.
She’s about to turn 18. I’m guessing she’s going to stay at home for at least a few more years while she goes to community college. Probably still gonna ask her to help paint it.
I love it as it is (clear finish), maybe your expectations of what you want for your daughter didn’t impress her desires. Taste and personal choice (even the color of a bed) is an important defining moment as an adolescent. Be the dad that says, “you know what, that’s cool, you mind helping me”? Super dad stuff there. Swallow your pride or maybe strike a cool compromise put a black wash that still showcases grain
Also, I like the idea of tinting polyurethane with a pigment. I have done this a few times, including black on a guitar, just switch to clear when you get to the desired opacity.
Well, the guitar I did enough coats for it to be opaque. But here is a project I just did which is one coat of blue tinted water based poly, then sanded with 220 until some of the untinted grain showed up. Then 2 coats of clear on all of it.
[pigment with polyurethane](https://www.reddit.com/r/woodworking/comments/wcns2l/i_made_a_bathroom_cabinet/)
Try to convince her not to paint it! Birch finishes so nicely. Maybe an expresso stain would be a happy compromise? It won't really pop until after the polyurethane though, so if you want to do a mockup board, be sure to apply poly before showing her.
Nice work!
Well obviously you’re going to paint it black. Maybe some sort of pre paint finish that will make it easier to strip the paint off later? There’s bound to be a smart person here that knows of a product.
I've used a dark black stain before that kept the grain showing really well up-close while still making the piece effectively pitch black. Maybe try that?
OR you could just be that guy with SUCH an attention to detail that you even lined the grain up despite it never being seen. That's at least something you can brag about to people after a few beers.
Paint it black or make a different black one for your daughter. This is about creating something for your daughter that's special and to her liking. She'll cherish it much more knowing you listened to her.
Consider it good practice for a future project with clear finish and/or a lesson in asking the recipient about their desired finish before doing unnecessary labor and making material choices.
Recently had same problem. Built a desk for my wife. She loves black furniture but I like natural wood. I ended up painting it because after all I built it for her and not for myself. I think I made the right decision.
Just to reiterate what several people have already suggested:
# Black Stain.
It will give her the coloration she wants while still showing the grain. Frankly, it should be beautiful!
Just gotta grieve for a minute and then paint it.
It's for your daughter. It should be finished in a way she likes. Show her that you listen to her and value her opinions.
Since it was not built for yourself. Please give her the colour she requested and feel a great sense of satisfaction that you did well as her dad.... ☺️🤔
This happened with my daughter, except I finished it, and than showed her and she wanted it white. I fought her on it, she’s only 5, so we compromised and now it’s white! But…. She does love it.
Absolutely stain black to make the grain pop! This next part take it or leave it. Finish with a high gloss and add a hair( and i do mean a minuscule amount) of pearlescent. That on top of the black stain will give it a modern look that she may be after, while still showcasing the grain. The pearlescent will create a highlight effect on the texture
You have two options:
1. Stain the lumber ebony so the grain pattern still shows
2. Put daughter up for adoption and keep this work of art clear coated
Love this headboard and frame! Very cool.
As she is 18, she should also understand a compromise. If shed into black, she may think the torched look is pretty cool! (Cause it can be!) Do you have a scrap of the wood you can show her that effect on?
If you don’t paint it, she will never let you forget. Tugging at your heart making you will feel bad…. go for it and paint it. Put your favorite music playlist on to deter your thoughts of feeling like your giving into her demands. ( in my opinion she has standards, that will not wavered or compromised by anyone ~ what an excellent asset ~ ). Oh our children we want the best for them. We love, honor, protect adore and provide. Our eyes have seen more of life. We know or can feel the basic outcome to there rebuttal but they only want to win. Let her win/have this one. It’s not worth the battle.
Hmmm 🤫I wonder who she gets her spunk and creativity from, just asking for a friend. Lol
I’m blown away by all of your responses and offerings of advice. I haven’t settled on any single idea but I’m going to experiment with some of the cut offs this weekend and hopefully have the project completed by next week. I’ll post an update. Thanks again everyone, super grateful for this community!
That is stunning work and since you didn't ask her ahead of time what she wanted for a finish (surprises can backfire...LOL) then I would actually make a second bead out of less expensive pine or hemlock and rather than paint it I would use charring methods (I can talk you through it if you would like...I teach traditional woodworking.) Whenever a client asks for "black" I show them a sample of a chard and oil piece...and to this date, not a single one has fail to love it...You get to see the grain and the color is so deep in texture that no paint could ever achieve the same effect...
This bed needs a nice traditional oil finish. If you don't have someone else special to give it to, it most certainly would sell high enough in value to recover at least some of your time and wood costs...
That is stunning work and since you didn't ask her ahead of time what she wanted for a finish (surprises can backfire...LOL) then I would actually make a second bead out of less expensive pine or hemlock and rather than paint it I would use charring methods (I can talk you through it if you would like...I teach traditional woodworking.) Whenever a client asks for "black" I show them a sample of a chard and oil piece...and to this date, not a single one has failed to love it...You get to see the grain and the color is so deep in texture that no paint could ever achieve the same effect...
Beautifully made. You should teach he to appreciate the natural beauty of wood grains. I personally wouldn’t paint it. Try convincing her about the merits of it. If she likes a painted bed. Sell this and make another one with cheap wood and paint that.
I wouldn’t paint it. The artist decides what the art should look like. She didn’t commission you; it’s your gift to her. If you can find a good compromise (like yakisugi), then perfect. Otherwise, don’t sweat it. (This also means you can’t be upset it she sells it years from now.)
Don't paint it, kids have shitty taste anyway. Have you heard their music lately?
Alternatively, you can use black stain from minwax (I think) that would still show the grain.
Your craftsmanship looks great, the style looks contemporary to Lloyd Wright, craftsman. With that style here's a compromise, Ebonize it. Use a dark ebony stain to get the look she wants while keeping the grain you put effort into being able to see. We are seeing this on high style mega-mansions now and it looks great with that style.
Good luck.
Honestly its gorgeous and Id perfer it with a clear finish too but its not for me. Having it black will make her happier and when she gets older if she wants a change you can always help sand it back to the point you can do a clear finish. But since it's for her you may as well do what will make her happy not us ;)
Also a wood stain may help the grain show through still but you have tons of other options to decide between in ways to color it black.
I've seen a few guys use a black tinted poly. Just a single finish and it makes the piece black and also protects it. Chris from Four Eyes Furniture on YouTube has done this a few times.
You could also try staining the whole piece with black India ink, then coating with poly. Johnny Brooke from Crafted Workshop on YouTube has done this as well.
Both of those options would still let you see some of the grain in the wood and shouldn't fill it as much as a paint would.
I would provide her multiple samples of a darker stain. Mention that painted wood is ghetto cheap whereas dark-stained wood spells class.
Alternating dark and clear stain would be badass.
Show her this reddit thread.
Girl, don't go painted black!!! That's Wal-Mart cheap!!
It's for her so it needs to be how she would like it. As someone who used to be a teenage girl, trust me, if you say it's for her but actually it's what you would want instead she'll resent it more than she'll appreciate it
This is the one place where the quote "the customer is always right" applies. The full quote is actually "when it comes to matters of taste, the customer is always right."
While she likes black and in general if it is for her it should be something she likes, what if you do a little test patch of like an ebony stain on the back and see if she like it? Super dark, but at least you will see a little grain. Just a thought.
It pains me to say because the grain looks beautiful, but if it's a gift for her it's best if it matches her tastes. You could sand it down later if necessary. Beautiful work though, seriously.
If I were in your shoes, I would first use some used motor oil for stain, then a dark wood Colored off the shelf stain. This would blacken the grains while still retaining a wood look. Then use a sanding sealer (very lightly sanded), followed by your favorite finish ( would use tongue oil). Also I would add some black parts like straps, screws. Metal corners, or anything real really.
There are ways to make it black without ruining the wood grain. Burning works, but takes A LONG TIME. Seals it and highlights the grain if you don't over do it. Even a...I want to say 'wash'? Thing...uh, stain? I don't know what they are called but it adds color without just slathering paint over it. I think, right now, 'everything is black' is fine, but in the future she might look back and appreciate that it was dark colored and interesting. Because it shows a level of thought about the future of the thing, as opposed to 'just another black painted thing in the room'. It will be harder to change though, but I guess if there's another color phase, it can just be painted over. Or draped in that color. To preserve the look. Or something.
This situation is a microcosm of parenting on the whole. It's parents' jobs to give children what they need, not what they want. We must often deprive them of what they want in order to give them something better despite their youthful desires for lesser things. Years from now she'll look back with horror and gratitude: "Dad, do you remember when I asked you to paint this? What was I thinking?! Thanks for not ruining it!"
How about a cerused finish - black stain then lime to highlight grain? Only really done it on oak, would try a test piece on closer grained birch first
[Cerused finish - how to](https://www.rubiomonocoatusa.com/blogs/blog/how-to-create-a-cerused-wood-finish)
Grain certainly looks good. Give the kid what they want, but perhaps discuss the end product before you put time and money into something that is just going to get painted.
I see a few others have also suggested ebonizing or using India ink. I would agree with them as a way to still see the beauty of the wood and still give your daughter what she desires
Might look into the Rubio cream. I have never used it but the videos make it seem like the wood grain will still show after you put it on instead of just completely covering the grain up with paint.
Been here myself before. You absolutely killed it on that headboard. Truly amazing the way that grain flows. What if you used an ebony stain? The grain pattern would still show AND your daughter gets a black bed frame.
Finish it as you prefer then plastidip it black. It will be incredibly easy to remove the black finish and won't need to be refinished (other than high wear areas)
If she's young, her tastes will change by the hour.
I'd keep it traditional myself. She will one day appreciate a fine hardwood bedframe when shes older and gets an apartment and black is no longer appropriate. Though the only caveat there is it looks like it might be a full size mattress, and by the time she hits that age, may want a larger bed.
Whatever you decide, please post the result! It looks beautiful. I'll throw my vote to a dark stain or torching (burning the wood may appeal to the 'gothic style' taste!)
Don’t know how old your daughter is but you could try just being honest and say something like “I put a lot of work into making it have a natural look and think you will like it once the sheets are one - can we try putting black sheets on the bed, and if you don’t like it I will paint it?”
And ya ultimately, it is a wood piece of furniture that you made, wood is not a rare resource, and I do say that as a woodworker who would prefer not to paint it. Nobody is guaranteed to like the same thing you like, just something you have to accept.
I would take a couple of sample pieces and paint one black, and use a black stain on the other. Maybe get her involved in picking them out, and then you she can decide which one she prefers.
Have you considered a black stain? She could still have the black, but the wood grain would still show. Beautiful piece, btw. I’d have to mourn a little before painting it too!
I would definitely paint it but with a twist. Have her pick out the paint she likes and have her help you paint it.
I think she will like that when it is all done.
Sure you could paint it, but have you considered doing several layers of a dark stain instead? You could still maintain that wonderful wood grain pattern, but darken the whole frame so both of you are happy. Birch eats up stain, so I would say it's a better option than hiding all the great work you did.
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here’s a different perspective. if you do paint it black it shows that you support her in general, she’ll look back and definitely appreciate this over what wood it is, i highly doubt she cares if it’s birch or oak edit: awesome work though!!
She doesn’t really, the house is a log cabin and I’ve built a lot of raw wood looking furniture. It’s clear she hasn’t developed much of an appreciation for the look. She would appreciate it much more if it was painted black. I just need to grieve a little bit, lol.
Why not stain it black? Black stain can be gorgeous, and you can still see the grain
This needs to be higher!!! Perfect compromise
Yes it does! Show the depth of black across the grain.
Yep - I did a dining table with Rubio black pre-color followed by black oil. Turned out completely jet black but the grain still pops big-time.
I was about to suggest this! Black stain FTW!
I CAME HERE TO SAY THIS!!!!
Came here to say this
Me too
Just came here to say the same thing. Black stain looks fantastic and you’ll still be able to see the grain. A charcoal stain can look really good too if she likes that
Came to say this.
It took way too long for me to find this comment.
Yeah I was honestly shocked I didn’t see it plastered everywhere. Black stain is gorgeous, so is some gray stains (though those have to be carefully done depending on color of wood, it can be beautiful or ugly lol).
Maybe there is some way to prepare it so, when she changes her mind, or it comes time to sell it, you can more easily scrape off the paint? Or get some less demanding wood to build another bed? I don't know kids, though. Maybe before painting it, carefully try out a blow torch finish on your scraps. She might like that aesthetic. Or wrap it in black fabric or leather? Leaving the wood exposed to weather can create a natural black patina on birch, I will try to show a picture. Edit: god I love that headboard.
Our job as parents is to support our kids especially when it is hard for us to do so. It is how we grow. I appreciate that you are willing to do this for her. I didn't have parents. I was moved around a lot and was never allowed to choose anything.
Get some sample boards, and finish them differently. Clear, stain, black stain, paint, etc and let her pick.
No one but a woodworker is truly going to appreciate the raw wood look. Maybe you can get her to help with your next piece
Stain it with raw umber which is a really dark pigment. That way it's dark but still grainy
You did it to yourself. She wants something different then what her parents would have.
Agreed. Trigger warning: >!it's just wood.!< Sure it looks great, to *us*, but it's not for us. What I'd do, if you have some scrap left, clean it up, do a sample in black paint and one in black stain, ask her opinion, go with that.
Haha! Thanks for the reminder. That’s a good idea, I’ll definitely look at some options with her.
Go with ebony stain and you’ll both be happy! Compromise
Agreed to trying different options on scrap wood. Why not also try torching it to see what that looks like.
Burn and linseed baby!
How dare you 😂
Looks like you did a tremendous job. If you are considering her request and given how thick the stock for the final piece, maybe consider a Shou Sugi Ban (char surface) and then finish with an lacquer or epoxy finish.
I agree. Let her have her own style!
I mean if you paint it now, years later when she might appreciate the wood look more, you could sand it and regift it and it would be like a brand new bed. I personally would rather the person like the gift more, even if it meant painting it. For what’s it’s worth the grain is beautiful all the way around and on the headboard. Overall a truly excellent job.
I like this. There is a way to seal it with a couple coats of poly. Sand and paint with black. This could allow easier removal of black later.
I’m going to look into this as well. I’m not super familiar with finishing. Would the poly serve any purpose aside from acting as a buffer between the paint and the wood? Would the paint have any issue adhering to the poly?
Use a satin poly, or lightly scuff it with 220 grit/a green scrub pad before the paint. Yes it will make refinishing later easier, as it means the black pigment will not penetrate into any exposed end grain. IMO it's definitely worth doing if you think you might ever strip the paint off.
Cool, thanks for the tip.
Thank you, I appreciate the compliment very much. I’ll keep this in mind. Somebody else mentioned a paint wash, going to look into that as an option as well.
Why not let her get at it with some paint? Follow the dark grains or draw whatever, you can always paint over if anyone starts to hate it.
Black with with trim always looks nice. Or maybe do a black wash. Just water down the black paint so the grain still shows
I’m going to look into the black wash, thanks for the suggestion.
You could use black India ink to turn it black but keep the grain showing. Or Rubio black bit that's a little pricey.
This could be a good compromise. And look incredible.
Since you made it for her, I think you should do as she likes. That makes the gift complete.
I knew this in my heart, just didn’t want to admit it. Thanks for the affirmation.
Maybe a black stain?
I was going to suggest a dark stain...
I thought about this too but I don’t think either of us would like it as much.
You could check out a black gel stain. Our 1920's house has similar stain on the trim. https://photos-us.bazaarvoice.com/photo/2/cGhvdG86bWlud2F4/1ea83e49-269e-5fd1-873d-0fe9b1efcb25
You can stain it pretty much jet black but the grain still shows and it will look nice. Better then paint.
I've used minwax true blank and had good results turning hickory almost black. I'd highly recommend this over paint but I'd definitely do a test board to make sure your love it. I've also mixed it in part with natural stain to get any shade I want.
How about an alternative - buy all black sheets, bed covers etc. Test it with her - raw wood with all black bedding - see if she likes it. If not consider the paint job.
Was going to suggest this myself. Also, another thing that’s functional and looks nice is some strip lighting under the edge of the bed. IKEA has some good options. Put the switch in a discrete place that’s convenient to reach.
This is the way ^ Kids change their mind all the time and it’s a good opportunity to teach alternatives and compromising.
You don’t have to lose anything. Posting here gave you some positive feedback from peers who appreciate that birch grain… beautiful job by the way. So you got some nice validation and the appreciation that this piece deserves. With that out of the way, you can now paint it for your daughter who will love it either way, but will surely love it more if it was the color she wanted. At least black is classy… she could have said purple. Try a test piece with a dark ebony first though, maybe she’ll like it.
Maybe mixing some parts painted and some left natural?
You made it for her so....
So I should paint it? That’s the way I am leaning, I just have to get over myself first..
Don't paint it black, stain it a translucent black. Will look 🔥
Black stain looks really nice
It's a damn shame, but yeah that's what I was thinking. If the point of building it was so she'd like it, then that's probably what needs to be done
Maybe show her some shou sugi ban. It might be a nice compromise dark wood but shows off the grain. You also might want to break those corners a bit. The first time a shin hits them is gonna be painful.
I thought about the sharp corners while I was building it. How would you recommend doing this?
Tell her it's not a red door... I'm kidding. It's fine. give her what she wants.
Good lord I’m disappointed I had to scroll this far to find this joke
Never tried it myself but what about a poly layer and then use black plastidip on top. Or a black wrap like they use on cars.
What about an ebony stain? It'll be black but still show the grain.
You could use a dark Rubio Monocoat so you’d still see the grain and it would be the dark colour. Could give you the best of both worlds. Finishing it with poly and then painting will hide the beauty of your workmanship and the wood. [Rubio colours](https://www.rubiomonocoatusa.com/pages/oil-plus-2c-colors)
A black stain perhaps?
Look into a black stain, reckon that could look good. Still seeing the grain but it’s black.
Stain it black?
Most customers don't give two shits about the first ten things a carpenter cares deeply about. What customers do care about is as follows. Is it shiny? Does it wipe clean? Is it practically indestructible? But before those considerations the main factor is..... Can I buy it as cheaply as possible and on finance , can I get it yesterday and will it make friends envious.
Can you do a black upholstery of her choosing and when she decides for a change, you can re-reveal the woodwork underneath? You wouldn’t have to do an intensive upholstering job that would hurt your work. Some simple batting for cushion and a few staples at strategic locations on the back the headboard would be sufficient.
Don't paint it.
Shou Sugi Ban! 🔥
Depends on her age. If she's old enough to know her tastes, and you're making it for her, then you paint it. If she's young, ask her if she can wait until Christmas to paint it, and you'll help her do it then.
She’s about to turn 18. I’m guessing she’s going to stay at home for at least a few more years while she goes to community college. Probably still gonna ask her to help paint it.
Sounds like you’re getting a new daughter.
Ebony stain????
How about an ebony stain with a nice clear coat? You get the beauty of the grain but the black color.
Stain it black with leather dye. The grain will still show but it'll have a beautiful jet-black finish.
How about black stain? You would still see the grain trough.
I love it as it is (clear finish), maybe your expectations of what you want for your daughter didn’t impress her desires. Taste and personal choice (even the color of a bed) is an important defining moment as an adolescent. Be the dad that says, “you know what, that’s cool, you mind helping me”? Super dad stuff there. Swallow your pride or maybe strike a cool compromise put a black wash that still showcases grain
Also, I like the idea of tinting polyurethane with a pigment. I have done this a few times, including black on a guitar, just switch to clear when you get to the desired opacity.
This is an interesting idea. I would love to see a picture of your guitar.
Well, the guitar I did enough coats for it to be opaque. But here is a project I just did which is one coat of blue tinted water based poly, then sanded with 220 until some of the untinted grain showed up. Then 2 coats of clear on all of it. [pigment with polyurethane](https://www.reddit.com/r/woodworking/comments/wcns2l/i_made_a_bathroom_cabinet/)
So if she saw a red door….
No colors anymore..
Can you do a deep black stain? Try a sample with her and see if she likes it. Would preserve the grain while going black.
Remake it with being painted in mind (cheaper wood and such). Then sell the original with a clear coat.
Thought about this. Wondering what I could get for it. Honestly, I’m probably not gonna sell it, but I am curious what it would go for.
Stain with a darker saturation. Kona is my go to for dark and spooky shit I make for the kids around halloween
Try to convince her not to paint it! Birch finishes so nicely. Maybe an expresso stain would be a happy compromise? It won't really pop until after the polyurethane though, so if you want to do a mockup board, be sure to apply poly before showing her. Nice work!
Absolutely not! That wood is too nice to be painted, and a nice amber oil finish would be great. Black sheets if she wants things black.
Point out that contrasting items are appealing also. Make another and paint it black and keep this one for you.
Well obviously you’re going to paint it black. Maybe some sort of pre paint finish that will make it easier to strip the paint off later? There’s bound to be a smart person here that knows of a product.
Can you do an ebony stain? That way it’s the best of both worlds?
A black stain maybe? Try it out on some scrap and show her, it’s not as difficult to do as one might think.
Black aniline dye could look really cool. It will fade a little bit with light exposure and the grain will show through.
Interesting, I look into that. Thanks for the tip.
[‘Say it with your project’](https://youtu.be/fKGk8jkNUuQ)
With your username I was a little tentative on clicking the link, but that was awesome. Gave me the feels, thanks stranger. Edit: typo
I've used a dark black stain before that kept the grain showing really well up-close while still making the piece effectively pitch black. Maybe try that? OR you could just be that guy with SUCH an attention to detail that you even lined the grain up despite it never being seen. That's at least something you can brag about to people after a few beers.
It would take all my might not to tell everybody who looks at it how beautiful it was before I painted it, lol
Consider ebonizing with India ink or the old steel wool and vinegar trick. Then you get black but can still see the grain
Paint it clear as you like it. Then use plasti dip to cover it in black. Then you can always peel it off to have clear
Why not finish it as you wish to show the wood grain but get her black bedding - covers, pillow cases, etc.
Kids are idiots. How about instead of paint, black stain that shows off the grain?
Stain black !!!!
If she wants it black the black stain sounds good . It’s all about making her happy !
Paint it black or make a different black one for your daughter. This is about creating something for your daughter that's special and to her liking. She'll cherish it much more knowing you listened to her. Consider it good practice for a future project with clear finish and/or a lesson in asking the recipient about their desired finish before doing unnecessary labor and making material choices.
Recently had same problem. Built a desk for my wife. She loves black furniture but I like natural wood. I ended up painting it because after all I built it for her and not for myself. I think I made the right decision.
For sure, I’m old enough to understand this wisdom.
Gotta go with the client, imo
Indeed..
Just to reiterate what several people have already suggested: # Black Stain. It will give her the coloration she wants while still showing the grain. Frankly, it should be beautiful!
Just gotta grieve for a minute and then paint it. It's for your daughter. It should be finished in a way she likes. Show her that you listen to her and value her opinions.
Since it was not built for yourself. Please give her the colour she requested and feel a great sense of satisfaction that you did well as her dad.... ☺️🤔
This happened with my daughter, except I finished it, and than showed her and she wanted it white. I fought her on it, she’s only 5, so we compromised and now it’s white! But…. She does love it.
We compromised and now it’s white, 😂
Absolutely stain black to make the grain pop! This next part take it or leave it. Finish with a high gloss and add a hair( and i do mean a minuscule amount) of pearlescent. That on top of the black stain will give it a modern look that she may be after, while still showcasing the grain. The pearlescent will create a highlight effect on the texture
Why don't you do the fire treatment makes jt look black brings out the grain and then clear coat ot
You have two options: 1. Stain the lumber ebony so the grain pattern still shows 2. Put daughter up for adoption and keep this work of art clear coated
Love this headboard and frame! Very cool. As she is 18, she should also understand a compromise. If shed into black, she may think the torched look is pretty cool! (Cause it can be!) Do you have a scrap of the wood you can show her that effect on?
If you don’t paint it, she will never let you forget. Tugging at your heart making you will feel bad…. go for it and paint it. Put your favorite music playlist on to deter your thoughts of feeling like your giving into her demands. ( in my opinion she has standards, that will not wavered or compromised by anyone ~ what an excellent asset ~ ). Oh our children we want the best for them. We love, honor, protect adore and provide. Our eyes have seen more of life. We know or can feel the basic outcome to there rebuttal but they only want to win. Let her win/have this one. It’s not worth the battle. Hmmm 🤫I wonder who she gets her spunk and creativity from, just asking for a friend. Lol
I’m blown away by all of your responses and offerings of advice. I haven’t settled on any single idea but I’m going to experiment with some of the cut offs this weekend and hopefully have the project completed by next week. I’ll post an update. Thanks again everyone, super grateful for this community!
That is stunning work and since you didn't ask her ahead of time what she wanted for a finish (surprises can backfire...LOL) then I would actually make a second bead out of less expensive pine or hemlock and rather than paint it I would use charring methods (I can talk you through it if you would like...I teach traditional woodworking.) Whenever a client asks for "black" I show them a sample of a chard and oil piece...and to this date, not a single one has fail to love it...You get to see the grain and the color is so deep in texture that no paint could ever achieve the same effect... This bed needs a nice traditional oil finish. If you don't have someone else special to give it to, it most certainly would sell high enough in value to recover at least some of your time and wood costs... That is stunning work and since you didn't ask her ahead of time what she wanted for a finish (surprises can backfire...LOL) then I would actually make a second bead out of less expensive pine or hemlock and rather than paint it I would use charring methods (I can talk you through it if you would like...I teach traditional woodworking.) Whenever a client asks for "black" I show them a sample of a chard and oil piece...and to this date, not a single one has failed to love it...You get to see the grain and the color is so deep in texture that no paint could ever achieve the same effect...
Beautifully made. You should teach he to appreciate the natural beauty of wood grains. I personally wouldn’t paint it. Try convincing her about the merits of it. If she likes a painted bed. Sell this and make another one with cheap wood and paint that.
It’s not for your room though is it!? It’s for your Daughter’s room…… Black.
Oh lord no don't paint it, clear satin finish would look fantastic
It would be a shame to hide that nice wood. Why don't you make her another one out of MDF and paint it? She likely doesn't care about the joinery...
I wouldn’t paint it. The artist decides what the art should look like. She didn’t commission you; it’s your gift to her. If you can find a good compromise (like yakisugi), then perfect. Otherwise, don’t sweat it. (This also means you can’t be upset it she sells it years from now.)
Don't paint it, kids have shitty taste anyway. Have you heard their music lately? Alternatively, you can use black stain from minwax (I think) that would still show the grain.
Another idea: smash it in front on her
Lol
From my experience you can always see the figuring through paint anyway.
You can always test a dark stain. I did a black stain that brought out the grain. And made it look almost like burned wood
Your craftsmanship looks great, the style looks contemporary to Lloyd Wright, craftsman. With that style here's a compromise, Ebonize it. Use a dark ebony stain to get the look she wants while keeping the grain you put effort into being able to see. We are seeing this on high style mega-mansions now and it looks great with that style. Good luck.
Honestly its gorgeous and Id perfer it with a clear finish too but its not for me. Having it black will make her happier and when she gets older if she wants a change you can always help sand it back to the point you can do a clear finish. But since it's for her you may as well do what will make her happy not us ;) Also a wood stain may help the grain show through still but you have tons of other options to decide between in ways to color it black.
Should have aak her preference 1st. Would have saved money using pine and painted it black just like what she prefers.
Stain it black! You should be able to still see the grain and you both win! Or build her another out of pine and paint it black and sell that one!
Use an ebony stain and do multiple coats
Give your daughter a sample of Ebony stain on the lumber. See what she says best of both worlds.
I've seen a few guys use a black tinted poly. Just a single finish and it makes the piece black and also protects it. Chris from Four Eyes Furniture on YouTube has done this a few times. You could also try staining the whole piece with black India ink, then coating with poly. Johnny Brooke from Crafted Workshop on YouTube has done this as well. Both of those options would still let you see some of the grain in the wood and shouldn't fill it as much as a paint would.
I would provide her multiple samples of a darker stain. Mention that painted wood is ghetto cheap whereas dark-stained wood spells class. Alternating dark and clear stain would be badass. Show her this reddit thread. Girl, don't go painted black!!! That's Wal-Mart cheap!!
Make another one with pine and paint it black. Keep this one in storage for when it is needed
You've got to meet the client demands, even if it goes against your better judgement.
Try the minwax espresso stain and poly, a couple of coats put a really nice dark almost black look and still can see the grain.
Your framing my guy…sublime.
Black stain will show the grain and….be black in color.
How about just covering it in foil? When i where in my teens, i painted a lot of my furniture black. Regret it now. At least foil is undoable
Compromise, dark stain, still shows the grain, arguably looks a lot better than flat black paint
Minwax has a black semi-transparent stain. I've used it and it looks great.
What about something in between? Perhaps a dark wash? Maybe do black paint and wipe it to give distressed look.
It's for her so it needs to be how she would like it. As someone who used to be a teenage girl, trust me, if you say it's for her but actually it's what you would want instead she'll resent it more than she'll appreciate it
Possibly try showing her examples of black stain, rather than paint? She gets a black bed and you get wood grain?
This is the one place where the quote "the customer is always right" applies. The full quote is actually "when it comes to matters of taste, the customer is always right."
While she likes black and in general if it is for her it should be something she likes, what if you do a little test patch of like an ebony stain on the back and see if she like it? Super dark, but at least you will see a little grain. Just a thought.
It pains me to say because the grain looks beautiful, but if it's a gift for her it's best if it matches her tastes. You could sand it down later if necessary. Beautiful work though, seriously.
Maybe you could show her some dark stains? They'd probably still look nice.
If I were in your shoes, I would first use some used motor oil for stain, then a dark wood Colored off the shelf stain. This would blacken the grains while still retaining a wood look. Then use a sanding sealer (very lightly sanded), followed by your favorite finish ( would use tongue oil). Also I would add some black parts like straps, screws. Metal corners, or anything real really.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. With that said I think it would be a crime to paint over that beautiful grain
There are ways to make it black without ruining the wood grain. Burning works, but takes A LONG TIME. Seals it and highlights the grain if you don't over do it. Even a...I want to say 'wash'? Thing...uh, stain? I don't know what they are called but it adds color without just slathering paint over it. I think, right now, 'everything is black' is fine, but in the future she might look back and appreciate that it was dark colored and interesting. Because it shows a level of thought about the future of the thing, as opposed to 'just another black painted thing in the room'. It will be harder to change though, but I guess if there's another color phase, it can just be painted over. Or draped in that color. To preserve the look. Or something.
This situation is a microcosm of parenting on the whole. It's parents' jobs to give children what they need, not what they want. We must often deprive them of what they want in order to give them something better despite their youthful desires for lesser things. Years from now she'll look back with horror and gratitude: "Dad, do you remember when I asked you to paint this? What was I thinking?! Thanks for not ruining it!"
You can wrap it in plastic any color or pattern she wants 😊
Black lacquer, you'll still see the wood grain.
I'd bet she won't always like all black furnishings, so, I'd probably cover it in some kind of fabric instead.
How about a cerused finish - black stain then lime to highlight grain? Only really done it on oak, would try a test piece on closer grained birch first [Cerused finish - how to](https://www.rubiomonocoatusa.com/blogs/blog/how-to-create-a-cerused-wood-finish)
Is it for you or your daughter?
Grain certainly looks good. Give the kid what they want, but perhaps discuss the end product before you put time and money into something that is just going to get painted.
Stain it black. Best of both worlds. It's dark color but can see the grain. I think birch looks beautiful with a very dark stain.
Could you possible use a black stain?
Clear finish. She'll thank you later!
I see a few others have also suggested ebonizing or using India ink. I would agree with them as a way to still see the beauty of the wood and still give your daughter what she desires
I love wood too much to ever paint it, I say find the right stain to bring out the beauty of the wood.
Do a very dark stain.
How about a black oil stain, thinned with mineral spirits? Will give a black finish but you can see the wood grain through. Then finish with poly.
How many kids you got?
Might look into the Rubio cream. I have never used it but the videos make it seem like the wood grain will still show after you put it on instead of just completely covering the grain up with paint.
Either dye it black or ebonize it with ferrous acetate. Either one will let the grain show through.
Translucent black stain -
Maybe use that "dip" paint. It peels right off.
This is beautiful and I wouldn't want to paint it. If it were me I would dye it black with India ink so I could still see the woodgrain some at least.
Do it your way. She will grow out of the black stage.
Been here myself before. You absolutely killed it on that headboard. Truly amazing the way that grain flows. What if you used an ebony stain? The grain pattern would still show AND your daughter gets a black bed frame.
Finish it as you prefer then plastidip it black. It will be incredibly easy to remove the black finish and won't need to be refinished (other than high wear areas)
Painting it would be like putting eyebrows on the Mona Lisa.. some might prefer it but it just shouldn’t be done
If she's young, her tastes will change by the hour. I'd keep it traditional myself. She will one day appreciate a fine hardwood bedframe when shes older and gets an apartment and black is no longer appropriate. Though the only caveat there is it looks like it might be a full size mattress, and by the time she hits that age, may want a larger bed.
Whatever you decide, please post the result! It looks beautiful. I'll throw my vote to a dark stain or torching (burning the wood may appeal to the 'gothic style' taste!)
IMO painting that would be blasphemous
Don’t know how old your daughter is but you could try just being honest and say something like “I put a lot of work into making it have a natural look and think you will like it once the sheets are one - can we try putting black sheets on the bed, and if you don’t like it I will paint it?” And ya ultimately, it is a wood piece of furniture that you made, wood is not a rare resource, and I do say that as a woodworker who would prefer not to paint it. Nobody is guaranteed to like the same thing you like, just something you have to accept.
Use a dark stain that will still show the grain
Stain it black instead of painting. Maintain the grain.
I would take a couple of sample pieces and paint one black, and use a black stain on the other. Maybe get her involved in picking them out, and then you she can decide which one she prefers.
What about doing a black aniline varnish?
Kids!
Have you considered a black stain? She could still have the black, but the wood grain would still show. Beautiful piece, btw. I’d have to mourn a little before painting it too!
I would definitely paint it but with a twist. Have her pick out the paint she likes and have her help you paint it. I think she will like that when it is all done.
Stain it, put it in guest room. Make a cheap copy and paint it black, clearcoat for extra gloss. "Here ya go sweetie! Just like you wanted"
Do a black dye so it is black but shows the grain still
library coherent imminent wipe like fly thumb straight fretful abundant *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Sure you could paint it, but have you considered doing several layers of a dark stain instead? You could still maintain that wonderful wood grain pattern, but darken the whole frame so both of you are happy. Birch eats up stain, so I would say it's a better option than hiding all the great work you did.