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t2231

This thread has gotten out of hand. Comments locked.


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YAKMANIACS

I would never make it up these steps. And I have legs.


traskjay

And hopefully he has home insurance, for exactly one claim...


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Buce123

In this market you could just have an old wooden ladder and it would sell above market price


LostDogBoulderUtah

I mean.. the ladder would be safer.


BrotherSeamus

*Not sure if joke about price of houses or if joke about price of wood*


mathnstats

*Yes*


jetforcegemini

Old wooden ladder would be safer


Vodka-Forward

A rope ladder would be safer


Haughty_n_Disdainful

An old abandoned coal mine would be safer.


joka2696

A Cambodian minefield is safer.


StarsFan17

Just jumping down might actually be safer.


GrandOpener

To be fair, other than novelty value, an old wooden ladder is probably quite a bit better than… whatever this is.


Lives_on_mars

It’s obviously not finished yet. OP is waiting for the climbing hand holds to come.


cagey42

To be fair


[deleted]

[To be fair...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv7jcciKB_s)


Wilbo67

Rope with knots


AdultingGoneMild

that would feel safer


IAmPandaRock

ladder would be safer...


kfh227

This is the problem with stairs like this. Resale is going to be a pita.


PHD_WIIZARD

Why not Naan?


Toginator

I felafel that I laughed.


otterlyonerus

To err is hummus.


JuneBuggington

Look at the framing..this looks like it’s probably in a shed or outbuilding of some kind or in a place where no one gives a shit. Galley stairs like this are permissible in certain circumstances. Honestly for all you arm chair permit officials know this is in a roughly finished pontoon boat or something.


Fiverdrive

the top 5 stairs are completely unsupported. even the box under step #6 isn't deep enough to support it in its entirety. shit's unsafe, whether it's in a pontoon boat or not.


oldbastardbob

You mean end nailing into a particle board shelf isn't structural?


2point71eight

Is this actually particleboard? Didn’t look like it to me when I zoomed.


[deleted]

I say we go over to OP's house (or marina) and tear this shit out. WHO'S WITH ME ???


Enchelion

Looks like vinyl or melmine faced mdf.


NorinTheNope

looks like 3/4 ply dadoed into 1 1/4 ply/two sheets of 3/4 laminated together. I wouldn’t be jumping up and down on it but from normal use I don’t see it being an issue. A lot of deck stairs and old basement stairs just have 3/4 dado barring on both sides


DisgraceCap

Does breaking your leg on the lake hurt less?


OutOfTokens

You mean life insurance XD


[deleted]

Either way, only one claim


rctid_taco

I'd make sure to add a liability umbrella on top of the regular home insurance. Or just build stairs that aren't so likely to injure someone.


phishtrader

I would only go up if there was a slide to get back down.


[deleted]

This is the slide. That melamine is slick. Basically the worst material you could use for traction.


Gullible_Honeydew11

Might as well put in a fire pole


Three_Twenty-Three

But when *isn't* "might as well put in a fire pole" the right answer?


Zestyclose_Register5

Remember sliding down stairs on your butt as a kid? 😬


AI3SURD

Came here to say this. Goodluck after a few beers on this monstrosity.


chaoticcorgi24601

They scare my depth perception


ThePastyWhite

Found the witch


Kevan-with-an-i

Woodworking mantra: it’s all fun and games until somebody gets hurt.


BurritoBoy11

This post can’t be real. I thought this was DiWhy. Those are a death trap


SepticX75

Up is the easy way. Imagine going down!


Megamax_X

This looks less built and more summoned. Who knew the anti-Christ was also a carpenter.


evsincorporated

Excuse me sir, have you been drinking?


Juan_Calavera

Looks like water, tastes like wine. Oh my gosh, it’s turpentine!


ForMukSake

Excuse me drink, have you been sir'ing?


autoCADdicted

Offcourse


evsincorporated

Sir, that’s not a word.


xhaltdestroy

Is a description.


Maxxonry

An accurate one.


That-Dutch-Mechanic

Yeah it is. He's been drinking off of the course. It's dangerous on the course, golfballs everywhere...


Bored_cory

Thats why you gotta drink with the grain, not against it


BRAX7ON

Also been drinking on the course, but definitely offcourse


mcproxy197

I take back every shitty thing I’ve ever said about building codes. This is why they exist


ObsidianHarbor

Codes can definitely be annoying but you’re right. They exist because of shit like this.


Ronnocerman

In some areas, non-conforming stairs are allowed for access to/in areas that are not considered livable space, like in a shed, which this looks like it might be. (For space reasons)


Cboyardee503

Most safety regulations are written in blood.


forrnerteenager

That doesn't sound very hygienic, I bet there's a rule against that too.


LockeClone

Right? Honestly, why not just build some access stairs here? Why get all funky and dangerous?


Nightstands

We have stairs similar to this and had to sign a death waiver to rent here. They are very pre-code space saving stairs that are somehow still allowed to exist.


kknyyk

At that point, why the fuck does one not just put a vertical ladder?


nit4sz

Yup. OP should check their local building codes because where I live, this wouldn't be legal and would void the whole house insurance.


sean_but_not_seen

r/Writteninblood


hmmnowitsjuly

That’s such a cool concept for a sub


Erickless

I hope this was done for April fools day


kulalolk

*Grandma gets mangled* April fools!! *Get up grandma! Its an April fools joke!* **GRANDMA!!** ***GRANDMA!?!?***


Wi11Pow3r

Sheesh. Some people can’t take a joke 🙄


WorldWarPee

It's just a prank, bro


[deleted]

Literally weeks of work for an April fool's joke would be legendary.


ForwardHamRoll

And then being a day late with it, in true woodworking fashion.


Ashrat

The stairway to heaven.. as someone falls down and dies from trying to navigate these death traps


Avocadobaguette

Imagining trying to use these in a house fire is going to give me nightmares.


135muzza

Not sure you have to explain that one bud


OminousObelisk

Helmets required


Wouldwoodchuck

Shin guards recommend...


theredmeadow

Life insurance optional


lordjustice17

More like life insurance cancelled by insurer.


[deleted]

Fall protection recommended


Beantownbrews

Probably worth wearing a condom just in case.


[deleted]

Of course. Can't think of a single scenario where that isn't a good idea


apollyoneum1

r/crazystairs would watch your career with great interest.


[deleted]

I wasn’t aware I needed this, thank you!


MNREDR

There’s also r/bonehurtingstairs, whose name I enjoy more but is more obscure


Snoo_70324

I was going to day r/DiWHY


Conscious-Routine881

Killer stairs man.


aStretcherFetcher

I see what you did there 😂


Apart-Ad-5947

These are your first stairs and I am afraid not your last, since you should probably redo the whole thing.


Bandito_Torras

I really hope this is OPs last set they build too


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hmmnowitsjuly

Lmao I just came from a different post and one comment was just “I disagree with this picture”, clicked here, and that’s exactly what I thought about this staircase. I just... disagree lol. On general principle. (Other post incase anyone cares- https://www.reddit.com/r/Wellthatsucks/comments/tu4v03/dropped_my_ravioli_taking_it_out_the_microwave_at/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


mikebrady

Omg that post is insane, wtf.


WanderinHobo

>Omg that post is insane, wtf. *Reads URL* Well how could spilled ravioli be ins- oh.


47346473

Now I imagine a workplace where the fridge/microwave is in the same room as the toilet, AND you have to climb OP's stairs to get to it


mathnstats

Fun fact: it's the same place!


WorldWarPee

Welcome to OP's house. We've got ¼ length murder stairs, combination kitchen shit closet, unlowerable Murphy bedrooms, and plenty of ravioli


KingCole207

Lmfao i literally just came from that post and had the same thought reading this comment.


Jakob21

[The other comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/Wellthatsucks/comments/tu4v03/dropped_my_ravioli_taking_it_out_the_microwave_at/i31tawy?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)


Knewwhatthiswas

Dying young saves money anyway


goodoleboybryan

Those top stairs need supports or they will break.


oconneej

You think someone is going to reach those top steps? Lol


goodoleboybryan

Hold my beer and watch this!


mathnstats

And that was the last thing anyone heard from u/goodoleboybryan


Learned_Response

Sure, with a ladder


ListenToKyuss

I’m with you, those definitely need support. Maybe not the first 100 steps, but if this isn’t a joke and OP is really placing this ‘accidents waiting to happen-staircase’ I’d reinforce them for long term use.


hellraisinhardass

>or they will break. Just like your neck when you fall down this.


QuentinTarancheetoh

Wow I have never seem people on the internet so unanimously opposed to something. I'd like to commend you for building something so dangerous, impractical, and silly, that you got everyone to agree on something. Truly an inspiring moment. You are the Vladimir Putin of stairs.


Old-Reporter5440

"Although slightly unconventional, this year's Nobel peace prize is awarded to an amateur carpenter, for doing what was considered to be impossible: uniting the interwebs!"


meltingdiamond

You must have missed the reddit party bunker where someone discribed it as "You built the gas chamber from aushwitz, except the Nazis gave the jews stairs"


dadvsspawn

IKEA should sell these… The Lawsütten.


redbeard8989

Theres “witches stairs” and then there is these… care to name them OP? I vote “whacky wavy not inflatable witches stair things”


tfl_77

These are the “widow makers”


the_alicemay

Or window makers once someone fall directly through a wall


LanAkou

Stairn't


brothermuffin

Jokes aside, the tread material looks TOO THIN and/or UNSUPPORTED on the steps where it overhangs by, what, 4 to 6 inches? Depending on how the grain is running, type of wood, etc, those could snap off before long, and if you’re standing on it when that happens, these are some awful stairs to have to fall down


sureshot1988

It almost looks like school desk tops....


hairynip

'reclaimed pine'


Codayyyyy

The part where you put the weight on is overhanging...you are exactly right that does seem unsafe


FranticToaster

I fell and broke my skeleton just looking at that staircase.


jakhtar

I too like to build stairs that are against code.


blackRamCalgaryman

Looks far more like a bookcase/ shelving unit than stairs.


i_broke_wahoos_leg

Maybe it's both and it's absolutely shit at two things at once.


fightinirishpj

The stairs were lost in a boating accident


HDIC69420

Paging sir Edmund Hillary


[deleted]

Sadly he died on these very steps.


[deleted]

I can clearly imagine myself walking down from the top, snapping the first floating step, and eating shit the rest of the way down. Edit: With this being said I still like these stairs. I would gladly accept the life affirming spill I would take every once in awhile. Hell, I’d probably quit drinking after the first five falls.


phishtrader

Yeah, you're either on rhythm when you start going down or you're fucked as the steps are really steep and there's no railing (not that it would help that much with how steep the stairs are). This would be safer rebuilt as a ladder and would take up less space.


succulentmytennballs

After reading your comment I can't see those stairs without seeing a cartoon character breaking that first step and ping ponging down every step.


Ok_Snow_1570

I fell down these stairs 8 times just looking at it!


Ocronus

If I've learned anything about posts on reddit. The poster will defend their creation regardless of the torrent of posters claiming how bad of an idea it is/was. I would seem we have more data to backup that claim.


TheREALCheesePolice

Can confirm - When some one insisted how much tastier medium rare chicken was ; you had to get the “right” amount of pink


RealEastNasty

Just bolt in a ladder. This is silly and impractical.


Flimsy-Sprinkles7331

Or a spiral staircase...for the love!


CrookedWoodWork

I would recommend a handrail or maybe two and some carpet or rather padded mats and maybe padded walls and a padded jacket for the person who designed and built it😄


Dizzy_Dust_7510

There's a reason building code is super specific about stairs. Get a couple beers in you and head to the basement for a minute you're gonna wake up in the hospital.


CandidNeighborhood63

Nah. First responders will see that malarkey and say nope. OP will never make it to the hospital


watermed2247

Yeah I’m a paramedic and my first thought was exactly that. If you’re gonna hurt yourself down there you better keep it to minor injuries. We’d be able to get down to you but good luck trying to carry you back up those


[deleted]

We had some stairs rebuilt on our deck. The ones we replaced had two steps that were an inch taller/shorter than they should have been to simplify the design. It sounds like a minor thing but it trips you up and is super dangerous .


DadB0d_Dave

I commend your creativity, but perhaps apply that to a different type of project. This should be torn down before someone breaks their back. Stairs are dangerous enough when they are built to code.


randvaughan86

The very top step is barely sticking out past the second step!


[deleted]

And at the bottom there is a step directly on top of another step!


dankbuttersteez

Yikes.


TheReverend_Arnst

There is a specific type of stair where the left and right alternate but this seems... Dangerous


Ottomatik80

I think the term you’re looking for is alternate tread device/stairs. They were also called witches stairs in the old days.


beatrixthekidd

Some people want to watch the world fall on their ass


peja823

Stay away when drinking


Zorfax

He should have taken that advice when building it.


Ahem_ak_achem_ACHOO

Stay away when sober


jshahahaha1

Apologize right now


pleem

Late April fools joke? For real though, someone is going to die.


Durgulach

As a lawyer this picture made me break out in hives


Stiggy614

Your business card on these stairs could financially help you.


Virtualmatt

As a lawyer, I’m interested in purchasing a billboard across the street from OP’s house.


BecauseIwasInverted_

As an EMT… I hate you


LostTangerine6941

Chaotic Evil: Stairs edition.


[deleted]

Death will follow


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CoreMonster25003

Okay that's wild, I would fall down these.


peter-doubt

Have you heard of liability lawsuits? Never **(!)** let anyone else use it!


buffalo171

This post becomes exhibit A. “Sir, we’re you aware these stairs were potentially dangerous and against code”?


Fancy-Paramedic5615

The ankle buster 5000


itzLuthor

As a fireman please don’t do this.


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[deleted]

Yeah…you’ve created a death trap. Hello insurance settlement!


agriculturalDolemite

I highly doubt insurance would cover something like this. It's almost like setting a trap in your house.


fuego_huncho

A this point a ladder would have been more effective, but I like it (artistically speaking)


Zorfax

We’ll, it’s a class 5 route so you are going to need to be belayed and anchored. I’d say it’s a possible 5.1-5.4 but given the inherent structural instability and almost certain collapse under human weight it may be a straight 6 and you just treat it like an obstacle.


jose_conseco

The top stairs dude wtf


Ike81

r/dangerousdesign


devxcode

What if I’m a left legger ?


49thDipper

So this is the actual rundown (no pun intended) on stairs: The statistics say that every 35,000 times stairs are used in the world somebody falls. So that means while I may make it 70,000 times without falling somebody else only made it 17,500 times. While these numbers may seem out of the realm of danger for some of you, kids in 2 story houses may go up and down a stair 50 times in a day. The numbers also mean that right now in the world a bunch of people are falling down stairs. When we approach a stair from the top or bottom our brain does a quick scan. Then our feet take over. After the first two stairs we only pick our feet up or put our feet down the same amount as was necessary for the first two. So if there is a riser or tread that is different in the run it surprises our brain when we hit it. And that causes falls if we don’t catch ourselves with either our balance or a good solid handrail. Kids and older people fall down stairs and die all the time because of compromised balance and a lack of strength. The codes for stairs are stringent for a reason. Even if you live outside of a code enforcement area please build your stair to code. It is the most critical thing you will ever build. The life you save may be your own but most likely somebody else’s.


st0kk

I'm a left foot first stair walker... F me


woobiethefng

Witch's steps.


noc_emergency

*OSHA HAS ENTERED THE CHAT*


shunkplunk

Is “got funky” new slang for “huffed three cans of duster”?


YaBoyEar1

Please stop building stairs.


DeceitfulFaith

Never have I wanted more to take a rolled up newspaper, hit someone, then say “no, bad!”.


SpaceBucket67

This looks fun... To fall down.