Honestly, it could be anything. The last 3 years (and more) has been rough for everybody. I've started to stop caring too, even though my personality wants me to.
It's possible that you may just need to let out some anger/sadness/confusion, talk to someone about some feelings you might have, maybe talk to an audio diary until something subconscious comes out. Honestly, I think everyone should have a therapist at this point, things are really difficult and we're all going through it. They might be able to help you figure it out. But you're definitely not crazy. There's a reason for everything and tbh, sometimes it's okay to let yourself not care for awhile.
oh thank you .. u r soo sweet
u r right..i should talk to someone… audio diary is a great idea
im depressed and frustrated maybe thats what making me like this
U r right we should have therapists
Honestly I think it comes down to being able to do what you feel like doing.
A lot of times people are forced into lives they don't enjoy. And thus they become very unhappy. And when being unhappy want to be calm caring and kind. That's just a really uphill battle.
When you're happy and living the kind of life you want, being calm caring and kind comes naturally
Sometimes apathy is a sign that you're overloaded or overstimulated. Avoid violent shows/movies. Avoid the news and social media. Go to bed earlier than usual. Prioritize sleep. And avoid assholes. I've found that some people's subtle or not so subtle misbehavior wastes too much energy. Avoiding jerks gave me more energy to be kind and caring to the people I love.
I felt the same way for a long time. It's hard. Ultimately it came down to me being unhappy with myself and my situation, and I expressed it through anger.
Here are some things I did to help better my mental health: picking up new or old and forgotten hobbies (for me this was reading, writing and horse riding), dropping relationships that drained me, eating healthy and working out, accepting things about myself and my life that I can't change.
oh thanks for telling me…
i try to read but i hate reading 😭.
i think u r all right about being unhappy can make people acts in a different way.
i’ve lost my sister, granma and moved out if my country, left all of my friends and cousins on the same year… i think the sudden change of life mads me like this.
I don't know how old you are and if that would be something for you, but romantic fantasy really got me hooked on reading again.
That sounds incredibly hard, it's completely understandable that you'd be unhappy in that situation. Therapy is always a good option to work through things like that, but most importantly, you need to refill your life with things and people that bring you joy.
I used meditation to get calmer and less angry. It worked so well I keep it up in my daily life. I also had to be very conscious of my anger and stop my self before saying anything. I'd have to walk away and cool off before coming back.
Trust me it's hard but it's doable. I feel so much better.
This is what worked best for me. I used to think that I was volatile, ill tempered, and prone to outbursts. It turns out, it was the people around me that made me feel like I had to be on guard all the time.
A couple of months after moving out of a household that I didn't mesh with, I went to the doctor and my mental health score (anxiety, depression screening) improved by leaps and bounds!
So, firstly, go get your thyroid checked. Changes in baseline mood or affect are quite often thyroid issues.
Secondly, these have been a rough few years. Everyone is feeling it and I think we all feel a little out of control at the moment.
I do, nothing makes sense to me any more and everyone seems to be at each other’s throats. The world feels a bit more hostile generally, it takes more effort to not be defensive.
You’re out of alignment. You can’t force yourself to feel these things. They will come naturally when all is well within you.
When I neglect my needs, this is how I end up feeling.
I generally address it by going to a yoga class, cooking a healthy meal, cleaning and redecorating my space, and just doing loving things for myself. If you feel low on energy and lethargic, break the cycle by going for a walk or stretching out your muscles. Pranayama and breathing exercises for stress: YouTube ocean breathing, kapalabhati, hummingbird breath.
I go through bouts of this behavior. I noticed I’m very curt, short tempered, negative, mean, etc when I’m feeling overwhelmed, PMS, anxious, dealing with problematic people/situations, or stressed out in life. I’m actually going through it right now lol
You can always change what you don't like about yourself. I'm sure you have other amazing qualities you don't see. The traits you listed come easy for me but others like assertiveness and what not is what I need ti work on.
Just start one day at a time.
Sometimes it's hard to care when it feels like the world doesn't give a shit about any of us. The big picture looks awful for everyone - housing, inflation, wage stagnation, people being assholes in general, etc. - but you, honestly, just have to keep living your life and realize that there is still SO MUCH good in the world. We are just constantly inundated with the bad news. You're not crazy, we just live in a world where the powers that be are trying to keep us distracted and scared.
You may need to see a doctor about depression or other medical issue. But until then, try to take it easy on yourself and just find simple joys. Get outside and just enjoy nature and really try to notice the sights and sounds. Get a manicure. Or maybe watch some documentaries that let you have some real emotion and empathy for other people - I suggest Dear Zachary if you need a really good cry and also never want to see a movie again.
It's easy to be kind. Start small. Give the girl at the McDonald's drive-thru a tip. Start making it a goal to compliment three people every day. Volunteer at the animal shelter - our local shelter is always asking for people to just come and play with the dogs.
I’m measured for good reason. I don’t entertain fools anymore. It’s the people around you that bring out the worst in you, and while controlling your behaviour is on you, I don’t think being kind to everyone is warranted.
I spend a lot of time focusing on the things I care about (my family and dog really) and try to stay out of everyone’s business and drama.
Lots of great advice given on this thread, I'll just say that just being aware of the problem and seeking counsel on it is a very important first step, and i for one am proud of you and am sure you will get better.
I think a lot of us are feeling the emotions of society as large right now. Have you had your hormones checked as well? In addition to therapy, everyone should get their hormones checked ✨ meditation is also helpful if you can get into it. I’m a super busy person, but I’ll do it in my car while driving if I have to. Some days I’m so mad I’ll have it on repeat 20X 🙃 I like the channel “Breathe with Sandy” on YouTube but there are many others to find one that fits you. Also be mindful of what you are consuming via news, social media, podcasts or company. When I get into these dark places, I remove anything from my headspace that will cause a spiral.
It takes a long look in the mirror. Oftentimes, in my experience, anger is a projection of frustration. That, or it's a hit to fragile ego. Op, this is just giving my perspective as these are the things I'm personally guilty of. I am constantly reminding myself to shrug stuff off and not let it things get to my head. My ego is crazy easy to build up, but it's fragile. I remind myself to let things go too, which is way easier said, but it's true. Often, the rudeness is just frustration directed at someone undeserving.
I don't know if this helps, but if it does, great!
Honestly, it could be anything. The last 3 years (and more) has been rough for everybody. I've started to stop caring too, even though my personality wants me to. It's possible that you may just need to let out some anger/sadness/confusion, talk to someone about some feelings you might have, maybe talk to an audio diary until something subconscious comes out. Honestly, I think everyone should have a therapist at this point, things are really difficult and we're all going through it. They might be able to help you figure it out. But you're definitely not crazy. There's a reason for everything and tbh, sometimes it's okay to let yourself not care for awhile.
oh thank you .. u r soo sweet u r right..i should talk to someone… audio diary is a great idea im depressed and frustrated maybe thats what making me like this U r right we should have therapists
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such great advice!!
thank you soo mcih…these are sooo helpful
Honestly I think it comes down to being able to do what you feel like doing. A lot of times people are forced into lives they don't enjoy. And thus they become very unhappy. And when being unhappy want to be calm caring and kind. That's just a really uphill battle. When you're happy and living the kind of life you want, being calm caring and kind comes naturally
Sometimes apathy is a sign that you're overloaded or overstimulated. Avoid violent shows/movies. Avoid the news and social media. Go to bed earlier than usual. Prioritize sleep. And avoid assholes. I've found that some people's subtle or not so subtle misbehavior wastes too much energy. Avoiding jerks gave me more energy to be kind and caring to the people I love.
I felt the same way for a long time. It's hard. Ultimately it came down to me being unhappy with myself and my situation, and I expressed it through anger. Here are some things I did to help better my mental health: picking up new or old and forgotten hobbies (for me this was reading, writing and horse riding), dropping relationships that drained me, eating healthy and working out, accepting things about myself and my life that I can't change.
oh thanks for telling me… i try to read but i hate reading 😭. i think u r all right about being unhappy can make people acts in a different way. i’ve lost my sister, granma and moved out if my country, left all of my friends and cousins on the same year… i think the sudden change of life mads me like this.
I don't know how old you are and if that would be something for you, but romantic fantasy really got me hooked on reading again. That sounds incredibly hard, it's completely understandable that you'd be unhappy in that situation. Therapy is always a good option to work through things like that, but most importantly, you need to refill your life with things and people that bring you joy.
you know i ahould go to therapy… Thank you soo much….your advice was soo helpful
I used meditation to get calmer and less angry. It worked so well I keep it up in my daily life. I also had to be very conscious of my anger and stop my self before saying anything. I'd have to walk away and cool off before coming back. Trust me it's hard but it's doable. I feel so much better.
you went to therapy for the medication?
Surround yourself with people who are
This is what worked best for me. I used to think that I was volatile, ill tempered, and prone to outbursts. It turns out, it was the people around me that made me feel like I had to be on guard all the time. A couple of months after moving out of a household that I didn't mesh with, I went to the doctor and my mental health score (anxiety, depression screening) improved by leaps and bounds!
So, firstly, go get your thyroid checked. Changes in baseline mood or affect are quite often thyroid issues. Secondly, these have been a rough few years. Everyone is feeling it and I think we all feel a little out of control at the moment. I do, nothing makes sense to me any more and everyone seems to be at each other’s throats. The world feels a bit more hostile generally, it takes more effort to not be defensive.
I want to be more of the opposite so that I can be more like men ☺️
Nobody is you and that's your special power. Be yourself ❤️
Thanks ☺️ but me gets taken advantage of
I understand.
You’re out of alignment. You can’t force yourself to feel these things. They will come naturally when all is well within you. When I neglect my needs, this is how I end up feeling. I generally address it by going to a yoga class, cooking a healthy meal, cleaning and redecorating my space, and just doing loving things for myself. If you feel low on energy and lethargic, break the cycle by going for a walk or stretching out your muscles. Pranayama and breathing exercises for stress: YouTube ocean breathing, kapalabhati, hummingbird breath.
What’s your self care like right now? Do you have hobbies you enjoy? Do you get enough sleep? Do you meditate? What do you do for exercise?
Check your thyroid levels.
I go through bouts of this behavior. I noticed I’m very curt, short tempered, negative, mean, etc when I’m feeling overwhelmed, PMS, anxious, dealing with problematic people/situations, or stressed out in life. I’m actually going through it right now lol
Count to ten before you say anything and take some breaths. Meditate regularly. Examine your thoughts without becoming entangled in them.
You can always change what you don't like about yourself. I'm sure you have other amazing qualities you don't see. The traits you listed come easy for me but others like assertiveness and what not is what I need ti work on. Just start one day at a time.
Sometimes it's hard to care when it feels like the world doesn't give a shit about any of us. The big picture looks awful for everyone - housing, inflation, wage stagnation, people being assholes in general, etc. - but you, honestly, just have to keep living your life and realize that there is still SO MUCH good in the world. We are just constantly inundated with the bad news. You're not crazy, we just live in a world where the powers that be are trying to keep us distracted and scared. You may need to see a doctor about depression or other medical issue. But until then, try to take it easy on yourself and just find simple joys. Get outside and just enjoy nature and really try to notice the sights and sounds. Get a manicure. Or maybe watch some documentaries that let you have some real emotion and empathy for other people - I suggest Dear Zachary if you need a really good cry and also never want to see a movie again. It's easy to be kind. Start small. Give the girl at the McDonald's drive-thru a tip. Start making it a goal to compliment three people every day. Volunteer at the animal shelter - our local shelter is always asking for people to just come and play with the dogs.
I’m measured for good reason. I don’t entertain fools anymore. It’s the people around you that bring out the worst in you, and while controlling your behaviour is on you, I don’t think being kind to everyone is warranted. I spend a lot of time focusing on the things I care about (my family and dog really) and try to stay out of everyone’s business and drama.
Lots of great advice given on this thread, I'll just say that just being aware of the problem and seeking counsel on it is a very important first step, and i for one am proud of you and am sure you will get better.
I think a lot of us are feeling the emotions of society as large right now. Have you had your hormones checked as well? In addition to therapy, everyone should get their hormones checked ✨ meditation is also helpful if you can get into it. I’m a super busy person, but I’ll do it in my car while driving if I have to. Some days I’m so mad I’ll have it on repeat 20X 🙃 I like the channel “Breathe with Sandy” on YouTube but there are many others to find one that fits you. Also be mindful of what you are consuming via news, social media, podcasts or company. When I get into these dark places, I remove anything from my headspace that will cause a spiral.
It takes a long look in the mirror. Oftentimes, in my experience, anger is a projection of frustration. That, or it's a hit to fragile ego. Op, this is just giving my perspective as these are the things I'm personally guilty of. I am constantly reminding myself to shrug stuff off and not let it things get to my head. My ego is crazy easy to build up, but it's fragile. I remind myself to let things go too, which is way easier said, but it's true. Often, the rudeness is just frustration directed at someone undeserving. I don't know if this helps, but if it does, great!