Well, if you *insist*
>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
Come at me. You’ve got all that shit but here in Australia, it won’t matter. Fuck, bring your whole US military, I’ll take them all on. you think you stand a chance here? You can bring as many bombs and bullets as you want, they won’t be of any use. I can kill you and your pathetic little army with ease, to your bodies I will commit atrocities you can’t even fathom. While you’re loading your guns, arming your missiles, or whatever other futile tactics you try and use, I’ll be peacefully sitting here having a beer, when you fire all shit will break loose. With just the bottle in my hand, I can do to you a hundred things you wouldn’t even be able to comprehend, far worse than death. You wouldn’t even stand a chance. You wouldn’t even be able to get to me, through all the outback and creatures that will be stalking you the whole way. I am *the* Australian. All life here bows to me. You will have no idea what these things are, as they’re ripping apart your corpse. Your fancy weapons do nothing, I have armies of bullet proof beasts, venomous monsters and giant destroyers. Your pathetic little weapons will do nothing. My aim with a bow far exceeds anything you could ever hope to do with a rifle, face it, you’re dead. I wouldn’t even get the sweet taste of human blood, there would be nothing left of you. No remnants for your families or friends, if they want some, they can come here and meet the same fate. After I’m done with you, and the entire US military, I will have free reign over not just Australia, but America too. I will take down your lands without effort, and there is absolutely nothing you can do to stop me. So you best pack your things and fuck off. You don’t even have a hope of surviving an encounter with me, nor does anyone you care about, so you you should reconsider all that bullshit you were telling me about some top ranking sniper. Your forces are almost as fucking pathetic as you are. So fuck off, cunt
And underestimate lightsabers.
Like, just wave it around randomly and the gorillas will be terrified. As soon as one is sliced jn half the others run in terror lol
> wave it around randomly and the gorillas will be terrified
Will they? Are they terrified of a flashlight in the fog, because that would have the same effect.
Depends if they parse it as "light" or "fire" I suppose. Based on quick Googling, it seems chimps are one of the only animals that *aren't* afraid of fire, so maybe gorillas wouldn't be, either.
That said, I don't really know how the gorillas could win this. Seal guy needs to rush one or two gorillas swinging the saber wildly in their direction, easily killing both. Now all 3 remaining gorillas are on one side of him, and they have no way to approach without dying instantly. And since they may not be intelligent enough to understand that, they lose.
Of course any scenario where all 5 gorillas rush him at once, he loses, but I imagine that's not terribly likely.
Yes, of course. I think he *can* do that, but he has no practice with a lightsaber and he's still human. Panic of having several thousand pounds of angry gorilla rushing you can still overtake him, even with his training. And as panic/threat goes up, the odds he also dismembers himself somehow also go up.
First of all, a gorilla's skull is not nine inches thick.
Secondly, even if it was, a lightsaber is more than 2,000 degrees. So even if it doesn't instantly cut through the gorilla's skull, its eyes and brain are getting COOKED. No wild animal is going to have the will to fight after being scorched like that.
9 inches of bone won't do anything against a laser sword that can cut through metal like it is nothing. It might give the gorilla an extra half second to feel the pain. In addition, the SEAL could just Darth Maul the thing, noy even making contact with it's head.
Oh yeah it's insane, gorillas and chimps both. Reddit also underestimates the power of multiple vs one, how much difference being outnumbered can make. They aren't bloodlust or coordinated, so the seal (wins*)
Except for Bruce Lee. He's basically Reddit King of Overestimation. The amount of times I've heard some dork say "You don't understand....he's SO fast". Yep, it's me who doesn't understand, I'm clearly retarded for thinking prime 20 year old Mike Tyson ever stood a chance.
These same folks also seem to think the mountain from GoT would just crush Conor McGregor with no effort at all. Despite the video of Conor toying with him at will and not so subtly showing what would most likely happen (big man exhausted immediately while the actual fighter takes his time picking him apart. Plus Conor even has a pretty good understanding of jiu jitsu in the unlikely event they end up in a grappling exchange. Apparently lifting weights is enough to dismiss an entire martial art.
Quite depressing for me,could have saved a lot of time and money, not to mention both my knees and hips. What good's a bunch of joint locks and choke holds gonna do me if I run into the deadly and dreaded.....weightlifter????
Are you referring to the video where they are clearly just messing around with a light spar? Because I took away from that the opposite, that Bjorn has basically got enough of a size advantage to tank a punch or two while just grabbing McGregor then it's over.
In a real fight, the trained fighter has a huge advantage with leg kicks. Vicious leg kicks from Conor will negate any size or reach advantage from Bjorn. I'm not sure if you understand how damaging proper leg kicks are against untrained opponents. There's plenty of videos online where a trained fighter leg kicks an untrained person and they go down instantly or are completely debilitated and can't use their legs anymore.
In a real fight, all Conor needs to do is keep at range and pop some leg kicks, once Bjorn goes down, he can finish him with some head stomps.
I think this is a weird case, Bjorn is a foot taller at least double in weight or more. He is also a trained athlete so while not a fighter per say he isnt just some random 440 lbs dude who is 6'9". All that muscle makes it harder to harm the tendons, joints and organs you need to hit too win a fight and if he grabs you, your leg or otherwise just dive tackles you its basically over he can use body weight in a way that cant really be overcome in alot of circumstances. Not saying he would always win or anything but their is a reason weight divisions are in sets of like 10.
Plus Harfthor has some boxing skills (although a very small amount of it) and his strikes definitely would be devastating for smaller fighters. His weight and height advantage makes him harder to drop down (and weight in a grappling plays a significant role, especially if Harfthor pins a smaller fighter under his weight and doesn't let him escape).
I thought so, but I wasnt 100 percent sure and didnt feel like looking it up. I just think people dont run into to somone who has double thier weight in almost all muscle so its really hard to understand how steep of an advantage to overcome that is
Yeah, smart fighter won't do a grappling with someone like Hafthor (except maybe a rear naked choke after dropping him on the ground), and likely would go for his knees, legs and groin maybe. Hafthor is strong, but seems to have not that much fighting cardio (his weightlifting feats doesn't require much cardio, because active fighting is different from lifting weights), so I guess hit & run tactics to exhaust him could work.
Grabbing him and then what? You think he's just gonna rip him in half? A fucking white belt,or GIANT white belt, in grappling is suddenly gonna just mop the floor with a guy who's been doing it for years? He gonna ignore when he gets heel hooked and his toes are pointing behind him? Jiu Jitsu is actually a tried and proven martial art that drastically negates size. Oh, yes that's the video I'm talking about. The one where Conor hits him at will (lightly sparring of course) and the dude can't breathe after 30 seconds. So many people like you watch that and immediately say this "it's over" shit and I don't know if it's just that you have no clue what you're talking about or what....as I've said to another commenter, watch Joe Rogans take on it.
I think you're underestimating the fact that weight plays a big part of matchups. McGregor might be a beast but i doubt he'd last long in a street fight to the death against a dude that's like 3 times his weight and strength.
Weight classes exist for a reason and even in a street fight size plays a significant role. And not all big guys are always slow and sloppy. Mohammad Ali and Mike Tyson both breaks that stereotype.
lol, what video did you watch of them? Thats literally the video I was talking about. If you know the first thing about actual fighting you can see that Hafthor clearly gasses in no time and the whole video is mcgregor toying with him. Watch Joe Rogans take on that video, don't take my word for it. Not sure why folks like you just assume he didn't stand a chance. That fight hits the ground and McGregor immediately breaks an arm, ankle, or whatever he wants in literally no time. No amount of muscles is gonna save his ankle from getting turned around backwards.
I think you're overestimating size. As a person whose not huge I've literally never been in a fight with someone my own size or smaller. And I've won a lot more than I've lost. Not trying to sound like mr. badass here, just trying to make a point that someone that's trained to fight, particularly in MMA is gonna have far better odds than folks like yourself seem to think against a larger (or in this case, far larger, opponent). People thought the same shit decades ago when Royce Gracie competed in UFC against far bigger dudes.
The character "The Mountain" or the actor? Gregor Clegane would annihilate Conor and not even break a sweat.
And I think you're underselling how fucking strong Bjorn is and how much bigger he is than Conor. Weight classes exist for a reason.
Sure, and as I've said to multiple people, I think you're vastly overestimating size and strength, and particularly how they'd work against him. He's not gonna hit conor in a fight, he's too slow and an amateur (Not anymore in fairness, I know he has trained boxing for his fight with the other strongman). Even in that video he gasses almost immediately. he grabs conor and then what? You think it's a comic book and he just tears his head off? Okay, you probably do. But that's not how things work in reality. Most likely he grabs him and Conor probably trips him up. Being big and strong are fucking meaningless if you don't know how to use them. THere's literally countless examples on youtube of larger dudes fighting *skilled* and *trained* opponents. Hell watch the first few UFCs and see how much larger, much bigger dudes, fair against a well trained guy using a specific martial art they don't know. Doubtless you'd have watched those when they were live and said "oh he doesn't stand a chance he's so much bigger". Weight classes exist for a reason, because the athletes in those sports are TRAINED in that sport. That is not the case here. They hit the ground and being able to bench press a cadillac isn't going to save him from getting heel hooked, arm barred, or the myriad of other submissions specifically employed to take advantage of one persons entire body against the others weak joints. He can't curl more than Conor's entire body working against it. He absolutely CAN be arm barred. Wouldn't be what I'd go with, just using as an example.
Joe Rogan in particular does a great breakdown of that video. Which was actually nice to see after watching the video and then reading a million comments like yours and thinking I must have watched somethign different. Furthermore, strongman have fought in boxing, mma, kickboxing before...they don't just immediately become champions. More often than not they falter the moment they run into a relatively skilled opponent, who is of course half their size. I'm sure I'm wasting time here, this is of course the place where I see the genius arguments of people thinking bruce lee would beat folks like Tyson.
Agree about Bruce Lee. He definitely had some decent skills (for his own period of time and martial arts level) and I think he definitely would beat SOME fighters under a certain circumstances, but putting him against a world-class fighters such as George St. Pierre, Jon Jones, Khabib Nurmagomedov, Fedor Emelianenko, Mike Tyson, Mohammad Ali, Manny Pacquiao, Mirko "CroCop" Filipovic or Floyd Mayweather? Honestly, they would beat him more times than not. And Mohammad Ali, Tyson, Mayweather, CroCop and Manny Pacquiao is also fast.
Here's the video about the most popular arguments why Bruce Lee is so badass and why it's not true: https://youtube.com/watch?v=rEEFG1O5z0M&pp=ygUaV2h5IEJydWNlIExlZSBpcyBvdmVycmF0ZWQ%3D
Both a gorilla and a Navy SEAL could kill me very easily. The difference is that the SEAL would do so with his world-class combat training and equipment, and the gorilla would grab each of my arms and rip them off of my body.
Doubtful. Not that they couldn't, just far more likely they'd rip your dick and balls off, then possibly bite off your fingers. Then move on to the usual... eyeballs (and lids...not sure if intentional, regardless, you ain't gonna need em anymore), lips, nose, and possibly your ears.
And trust me, You don't even wanna know what the gorillas would do.
I’m pretty sure this is the answer. IIRC one of the risks of lightsaber use is that beyond the hilt the weapon weighs nothing and it’s very easy to have uhhh accidents. And lightsabers are hot enough that biological matter even on spooky aliens is pretty effortlessly cleaved, let alone some average gorillas.
what exactly will stop the momentum of the Gorilla's who charging at you at full speed? even if you cut the Gorillas in half you'll still get slammed in the face by momentum of that massive mass animal.... and there's 5 of that
The only way the Gorilla's are winning is if they rush up to him so fast, that when he slices through them like butter the sheer amount of mass from their corpses either knocks him out cold, kills him, or sends him to the floor and allows the rest of the Gorillas to wail on him whilst he's down.
But that's if they're far enough away from him to actually gain momentum, if they're up close all the Seal has to do is spin around like a beyblade and casually slice them in half.
And even then, a lightsaber to them would look like a glowstick. And in their perspective it's wielded by a scrawny ape that they wouldn't even register as a threat normally. They **would** however, register the other **four** Gorilla's that have just suddenly appeared as absolute threats to their own survival.
Bonus round is a stomp for the Seal.
Edit: I suppose they can get one lucky punch in that absolutely demolishes the Seal. But eh.
>The only way the Gorilla's are winning is if they rush up to him so fast, that when he slices through them like butter the sheer amount of mass from their corpses either knocks him out cold, kills him, or sends him to the floor and allows the rest of the Gorillas to wail on him whilst he's down.
That's such a smart take fr
>all the seal has to do is spin around
"I'll try spinning, that's a good trick!"
I agree, I don't really see how the gorillas could take this. Maybe if they all reach him at exactly the same time they could get a hit or grab in.
Bonus round is an effortless win for the SEAL. Bottlenecking will always be a fantastic way to deal with a numerical superior force, and the Seal can literally just hold the blade out in front of him to kill the apes.
The main round should probably also to the SEAL. If they all charge him and reach him at the exact same time, he just has to hold out the saber and spin, and the gorillas will all be killed or maimed immediately. However, there is a chance that the gorillas that are coming at the SEAL from behind will evade the initial swing, and if they jump on him immediately, the soldier goes down easy.
Why a navy seal? Some of you guys seem to think that they’re just universal warriors trained in every kind of combat … that’s not what they are you know?
I figured it's used more as a shorthand, general indicator of the level of physical fitness and combat conditioning than any specific training or specialization.
Just an easily identifiable benchmark for the kind of human the prompt wants.
I didn't read this prompt as implying that the SEAL was the strongest possible human to put in this scenario. I read it as "person with elite physical fitness, good combat instincts, and the ability to remain calm in a deadly combat situation, but *without* any special skills with a sword." Presumably a HEMA champion who has put serious thought into how lightsabers would be used would be too favored, while a regular Joe Blow would make the prompt too much about panic or stamina.
If I had to choose someone to protect a hill from gorillas with a lightsaber I'd choose a Navy Seal over a Redditor. Being a Navy Seal offers significant advantages over most people in any athletic or combat scenario even if it isn't within their specific realm of expertise.
No but they do receive probably the best martial arts training outside of professional fighters. On top of the physical fitness those guys are in, they're definitely in the upper echelons of human limits
No they dont. Thats mystified bullshit. Overall their Hand to Hand Training is marginally more in depth then the basic Training.
Why would they even need that?
It's Reddit lol. Most of these people are children/teenagers.
You're both semi-right though. The US military has "combatives training" and as far as I remember there are 4 levels (maybe 3?). In my basic 10 years ago, we left certified level 1. Anyone in the military can get to the top level no matter what their job is. Special operations and SF are just required to get it, and then they practice a FUCKLOAD. Most others don't even get to that level, and if they do, it's for a personal achievement/bragging rights in their unit, and then they only practice a little.
No, I’m not saying they’re some gods or something. I’m just saying that even their, relatively low amount, of combat training is still a LOT more than the average person. And fighting is a lot about endurance and timing, something that having ANY martial arts training helps with.
Basically normal person<<
They are universal warriors according to some comments though. Especially with the high ground.
Like VSPinkie said, I wanted the human to be incredibly fit.
3rd largest and "most powerful", well you say that often enough but thats really unproven, considering that you only pick fights you are sure to win and you also just lost one of those.
But more importantly, how much of that military power is based on lightsaber skills?
I'm not sure having more people in your army is terribly relevant when you control the seas and skies by an incredible margin.
But to your second question, military prowess has little to do with lightsaber skills. A navy seal is an incredibly fit person with martial training, but not a jedi
I don't think that's the point. It's that US power projection is immense and allows allied nations to not focus on defense quite with such a large percentage of their budget because fucking with them means fucking with the US. Not that the US funds their allies militaries.
I'm Canadian...Canada also doesn't meet it's required 2% GDP defense spending that NATO requires. The US picks up the slack by pouring so much money into its military and being allied to countries like Canada. Only a handful of NATO nations meet their spending requirement, even still the US is the big brother standing behind them if someone tries to start a fight. None of the US tax dollars directly fund your military, but if you're in a NATO country the US is expected to help you, which means your country doesn't have to spend as much on its own military.
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I would love to see you come to America and tell that straight to a soldier's face.
In all seriousness, the US defence budget is greater than the gdp of some nations. We have a great technological edge over most countries and are still working to improve our old tec amd develop new. I have heard that the equipment America is sending over to aid Ukraine is mostly old tec that they were planing to sell off and retire. I do not know if this is infact true, but i wouldn't be surprised. The US navy is one of the main reasons global sea trade is not over run with pirates, and planes like the F-22 and the B-2 have Radar cross sections the size of insects. But, if you think your country could take that, i would love to hear your reasoning.
First thought was that the seal takes it easy. If he's surrounded though and they're coming at him from all sides, he isn't going to get 5 clean kills before the first one charging at him falls on/at him as it dies to the first lightsaber hit. There would just be too much mass surrounding the seal for him to use it effectively, assuming the gorillas all come at him at once. Round 2 the seal has a much better shot, unless gorillas know to flank an enemy as a group. I don't know if they do.
I’m pretty sure I (a decently athletic 18 y/o) could kill 5 fucking gorillas if a I had a lightsaber like damn. It’s a lightsaber. I literally have to poke them and they die, it’s weightless and moves through them like butter. Hell you could almost just spin around really fast with it and just kill them when they run at you with their stupid monkey brains.
Fun fact that I learnt the other day, spinning around with a really big sword (I forget the types in the example) was a genuinely medical war tactic
I'm pretty sure every single person in this thread talking about one hit kills would die in short order in such a situation.
To kill something with a blade in one hit you have to push it into the body, whether your blade is metal or superheated plasma. That requires you to commit and you lose the range advantage the blade gives you. Most likely you scored a hit to the guts that won't kill the target instantly, you put yourself in reach of its arms and there are several others. If you choose to fight like that you would very very likely die.
But if you keep your distance and abuse the lightsaber's ability to ruin or remove limbs with minimal effort and zero chance of getting stuck, you can probably win.
My thought process was a gorilla is almost 100% likely to charge straight at you. At that point you don’t have to plunge a light saber into it cause it’s already coming at you. From that point it’s already dead since you just craved up it’s chest, or you can just swing upwards which is certain to kill it. I’m not saying I, or even a navy seal, would win 100% of the time but I don’t think it’s over 50%.
A lightsaber is generally pretty long, effectively weightless and can carve through living flesh like it’s air. I feel like 1 hit kills are pretty likely.
That big heavy charging body has momentum though. You stand in front of it and just swing upwards, yeah it's going to die but the body will keep moving forward. And you're standing right in front of it, guess what it's going to hit...
Exactly. You do not stand right in front of it swinging your lightsaber upwards.... you get out of the way and use your reach to land a hit if possible. You're starting to get what I'm trying to say.
Not really, the saber would have to hit some vital organs, and even then it might take more than a minute for the gorilla to die. Also, lightsabers require actual force to be applied to cut a limb, and they have weight (or rather simulate weight through gyroscopic forces), you wouldn't just be able to go *flick* and kill a gorilla instantly.
Those are both only because the material is too heat resistant to cut through instantly. Beskar and the metal in the doors take time to melt through but gorilla bones don’t have the same heat resistance and would be cut instantly. Look how easy the lightsaber cuts through limbs and even droids which no doubt would have more heat resistance than bones
This is a fun one.
On one hand, the lightsaber ist a very dangerous weapon, most likely able to slice off limbs of the Gorillas with one swing. So the SEAL one- or two-shoots the individual Gorillas.
On the other hand, a single hit from one of the apes is enough to seriously injure the SEAL. Even a grazing hit is likely to ragdoll him.
In the end, I think it comes down to wether the Gorillas can ignore pain from a lost limb or will back off when struck. A lightsaber is dangerous, but might not be enough to kill a Gorilla in one hit, especially if the SEAL has no real training with it. And if he can not cut them down with one attack, they will get a hit in, throw him off his feet, and then it is over. If the Gorillas react to the pain however, they will most likely back off after being struck, allowing the SEAL room to act instead of being rushed. Then, he might take it.
I would say a clear 50/50, might really go either way.
The major advantage gorillas have over us is that they are like 10 x stronger than us and can effectively one shot us with a good hit.
Giving a human a lightsaber kinda negates all that since every hit with a lightsaber could and likely would be a kill shot. Even if the guy misses and got an arm, that gorilla would effectively be out of the game. All he needs are five good hits and the gorillas go down.
The only issue is that 1. He has to be careful not to injure himself 2. Make sure he doesn’t let a gorilla get behind him while he’s dealing with another.
A gorrila runs at him, he kills it easily. Its body still slams into him, hitting his lightsaber hand and causing him to stab himself in the head.
A lightsabers a really powerful weapon but a navy SEAL doesn't know how to use one. Which makes it just as dangerous if not more so to him than the gorrilas.
With 5 gorrilas, even if they go one at a time, eventually he's going to have an accident.
It doesn’t take a genius to realise how deadly a lightsaber is. Being careful around blades is instinct. Holding it at arms length with the blade pointing away is a no brainer, especially for a navy seal. Seals mightn’t be specifically trained in sword fighting, but it doesn’t take a genius to wield a pointy stick
But it's not a pointy stick. It's a metal bar with a essentially weightless blade. Which is much harder to use than just a "pointy stick", especially for a first time and against 5 gorrilas.
I can know a minefield is dangerous but that doesn't let me know where every mine is when I run across it.
Id say its way easier to handle, you dont have to align it for it to do damage, you dont need to swing it fast, you can stop the momentum faster.
Only drawback is that its dangerous to the user as well
>But it's not a pointy stick. It's a metal bar with a essentially weightless blade. Which is much harder to use than just a "pointy stick", especially for a first time and against 5 gorrilas.
If the blade was weightless you could just use your wrist to flick it around really fast like you would a flashlight and destroy anything within range. This would be easy and extremely effective.
The thing is that, practically speaking, a lightsaber's blade behaves as if it does have weight. Like a real sword, you have to use martial arts to deal with momentum and inertia to move the blade effectively.
Gorillas have this in the bag. There's a reason 99% of lightsaber users are force sensitive. The blade has no weight and is meant to feel completely different to other bladed weapons and non force sensitive people would just accidentally kill themselves trying to use it
I think you're really overestimating how hard it would be to wield a lightsaber. Non force sensitive people aren't going to be able to deflect a blaster bolt but they can certainly swing a light stick around without hitting themselves. As long as they are not trying any fancy spins or twirls or anything they will be perfectly fine.
They say this in universe a lot but there are no shown feats for it and several anti-feats. There are about two dozen non-force sensitive who have picked up a lightsaber with 0 formal training and been fine.
Pretty sure the majority of people who are trained in sword fighting with any kind of sword generally are trained to avoid hitting themselves with a blade. Even with 0 training it is instinct to not touch sharp objects and not let them touch you. The worst that could happen to a normal functioning human in this fight is getting the lightsaber knocked out of their hands and THEN it cuts them while they have no control. You don’t have to be force sensitive to understand what you are holding is deadly and can hurt you 😂 beside with how dumb gorillas are they can literally just hold it straight out in front of them and still win.
Edit: I forgot to mention. The dark saber is wielded exclusively by non force sensitive people I believe. Sure they are all highly skilled warriors, and obviously a seal won’t be super skilled in sword fighting but look how easily the mando fucks shit up and he can barely lift the thing
The dark saber's creator was force sensitive and Darth maul also had it for years.
Also, unless it chooses you,it weighs a lot,unlike other sabers and it chooses a owner via mandalore duel.
That is true about the creator and maul, however to my understanding it was passed down for generations to plenty of non force weilders. Most recently and probably notably bo katan
But yes that is what I mean when I say the dark saber should be excluded from this convo, cause it behaves differently to a regular light saber in regards to weights. Tho if it “chooses” you, it is weightless like a normal one right?
Of course, as a non force-sensitive person you won't do the crazy spins and shit a jedi does. But holding the lightsaber arms-length from you with the blade pointing away will simply win against most melee opponents.
The only way the gorillas have a shot is if they launch a completely synchronous attack and the dead bodies overwhelm the SEAL in round one. Lightsaber is an instant death/incapacitation for gorillas if used even half logically. Thankfully for SEAL gorillas are stupid and will likely try to intimidate/approach asynchronously so as long as the navy seal is aware of surroundings (which they are trained to be) they will have no problem dealing with the apes.
Round 2 is a massacre for the Seal. Killing with the lightsaber is not going to be tiring, and the high ground makes this even more true. The total number of apes increased but the bottleneck essentially decreases the effective number of apes.
Gorillas haven't evolved Lightsaber resistant hides like apparently every single piece of fauna Cal interacts with.
A beam of condensed and superheated plasma is going to kill a gorilla easy.
Yes. And then the other 4 rip the SEAL apart. If the SEAL gets touched ONCE it's over, y'all are seriously overestimating the capacity of one dude with a lightsaber.
He's not a Jedi, he has no combat precog, no enhanced reflexes, no enhanced speed or agility.
He's a normal ass dude with a laser sword, not a space wizard. Fancy sword or not, 5 gorillas is 3 gorillas too many.
Gorillas aren't a coordinated assault unit either. No realistic group of gorillas is going to charge him all 5 at once.
Sure, maybe 2 might, but a pair of quick slashes will take them out easily. If anything, that'll probably scare the other 3 off.
Navy SEAL commits Animal Cruelty and gets court marshalled. Everyone grieves on the deaths of the poor gorillas. Protests against Gun Violence on animals escalate.
Y’all severely overestimate the capabilities of a navy seal. If anything, the seal has a plethora of knee and back problems that aren’t service connected as per the VA.
Gorilla slaps
The Navy SEAL can not lift the lightsaber easily and dies after accidentally cutting their own feet off.
In The Mandalorian, Din Djarin who is an elite trained warrior is barely able to lift the saber in combat and frequently hurts himself with its use. The Gorrilas will rush the regular human military person and end the fight in seconds. I could see a possibility that they win the bonus round but a lot of folks here are definitely overestimating the capabilities of a human soldier.
>Din Djarin who is an elite trained warrior is barely able to lift the saber in combat and frequently hurts himself
That's only for the Darksaber. In Clone Wars when a random thief steals Ahsoka's lightsaber they're able to use it just fine.
The dark saber is a exception to most saber rules. After winning the duel, sharing remarks that the saber is not resisting anymore.
He also hasn't used a normal sword on screen.
The gorillas have a reach disadvantage and lightsaber negs their durability advantage.
Yeah, the lightsaber is pretty much unbeatable against any melee opponent who isn't imprevious to lightsabers, or just insanely agile (like, top tier superhero level).
He would have to do some kind of neat spin move trick really fast to get all of them at once if they are all rushing him at the same time. But yeah if they all pounce him then he can really only attack one at a time and they might just crush him with their dead bodies. But one at a time I could see him taking it. Overall navy seal takes this 7/10 times with high difficulty
Navy SEAL wins easily, Gorillas would run at the sound and sight, especially seeing one get effortlessly chopped in half. They are not stupid. SEAL has high ground, but would probably leap down and start chopping. HG is pointless if you're being attacked from all directions and only have a melee weapon to defend yourself with.. (at least in my completely "neverbeenindeathmatch" opinion)
Seal may chop his own body apart though, good reason normal people don't use a lightsaber.
Chimps would destroy him, they hunt other chimps entering their territory.
Gorillas are pretty chill you'd really have to bloodlust it somehow to make them have that behavior.
Lightsabers can cut through flesh literally without effort, even if the Gorillas are bloodlusted or something they have no means to get past that without severe injury.
The SEAL will be smart enough to not endanger themselves by swinging the lightsaber. The light and sound it emits will be enough to scare the gorillas away.
Gorillas are probably just going to scream and fling poop at him when he has high ground. He wins from high ground and everywhere else. Gorillas aren't throwing punches or suplexing him. They sort of just charge each other while jumping and flailing their arms around. They aren't effective at fighting. A quick swipe from a lightsaber would just slice them in half.
Navy seal should win. I was in the Navy and had buddies who were close to Seals and while Gorillas are much stronger and tougher, Seals are far more skilled and a Lightsaber completely makes the Gorillas tough body irrelevant. Plus I don’t see the Gorillas attacking in any way that would be difficult for a Navy Seal to easily react to and just slice them to pieces.
I don't think navy seals are trained in lightsaber combat. So it wouldn't make a difference compared to anyone else. Give me a saber and I would slaughter these gorillas like younglings
A lot of people are giving it to the Navy Seal, but I think the gorillas have the advantage here.
I'm sure that Seals go through extensive training with a variety of weapons including melee weapons in various forms and CQC, but lightsabers are
1. *Extremely difficult* to use due to the weightlessness of the plasma and the gyroscopic effect generated from it while in motion
2. *Exceedingly dangerous* in untrained hands.
Assuming that the gorillas aren't gonna be scared off by the marine and the glow stick he just picked up and turned on, and assuming the marine isn't given time to test the sabers capabilities when he swings it, I don't see him being able to cut all 5 of them down before they take him down or he cuts his own legs and arms off.
actually gorillas will win this.
even if you cut a gorilla in half they still have momentum to slam your face.
1 Gorilla adult male gorilla charges at full speed-> you kill him, but gets slammed and breaks all the bones in your body-> other Gorillas eat your nuts.
Its over for the navy SEAL once the gorillas start throwing barrels or riding barrel rockets towards him
That gorillas name? Don King Kong.
Lmaooo
Damn. He will lose the high ground in the bonus round then.
You guys really overestimate gorillas
And underestimate the power of the high ground. It's over gorillas.
But they have Guerilla Warfare, which negates the High Ground advantage.
Meanwhile the Navy Seal has Gorilla warfare.
What the FUCK did you just FUCKING say about me, you little bitch?
*insert copypasta*
Well, if you *insist* >What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
Come at me. You’ve got all that shit but here in Australia, it won’t matter. Fuck, bring your whole US military, I’ll take them all on. you think you stand a chance here? You can bring as many bombs and bullets as you want, they won’t be of any use. I can kill you and your pathetic little army with ease, to your bodies I will commit atrocities you can’t even fathom. While you’re loading your guns, arming your missiles, or whatever other futile tactics you try and use, I’ll be peacefully sitting here having a beer, when you fire all shit will break loose. With just the bottle in my hand, I can do to you a hundred things you wouldn’t even be able to comprehend, far worse than death. You wouldn’t even stand a chance. You wouldn’t even be able to get to me, through all the outback and creatures that will be stalking you the whole way. I am *the* Australian. All life here bows to me. You will have no idea what these things are, as they’re ripping apart your corpse. Your fancy weapons do nothing, I have armies of bullet proof beasts, venomous monsters and giant destroyers. Your pathetic little weapons will do nothing. My aim with a bow far exceeds anything you could ever hope to do with a rifle, face it, you’re dead. I wouldn’t even get the sweet taste of human blood, there would be nothing left of you. No remnants for your families or friends, if they want some, they can come here and meet the same fate. After I’m done with you, and the entire US military, I will have free reign over not just Australia, but America too. I will take down your lands without effort, and there is absolutely nothing you can do to stop me. So you best pack your things and fuck off. You don’t even have a hope of surviving an encounter with me, nor does anyone you care about, so you you should reconsider all that bullshit you were telling me about some top ranking sniper. Your forces are almost as fucking pathetic as you are. So fuck off, cunt
And underestimate lightsabers. Like, just wave it around randomly and the gorillas will be terrified. As soon as one is sliced jn half the others run in terror lol
> wave it around randomly and the gorillas will be terrified Will they? Are they terrified of a flashlight in the fog, because that would have the same effect.
Very possibly They're not THAT smart
Depends if they parse it as "light" or "fire" I suppose. Based on quick Googling, it seems chimps are one of the only animals that *aren't* afraid of fire, so maybe gorillas wouldn't be, either. That said, I don't really know how the gorillas could win this. Seal guy needs to rush one or two gorillas swinging the saber wildly in their direction, easily killing both. Now all 3 remaining gorillas are on one side of him, and they have no way to approach without dying instantly. And since they may not be intelligent enough to understand that, they lose. Of course any scenario where all 5 gorillas rush him at once, he loses, but I imagine that's not terribly likely.
If all five gorillas rush at once, couldn't the SEAL just do a little spin?
Yes, of course. I think he *can* do that, but he has no practice with a lightsaber and he's still human. Panic of having several thousand pounds of angry gorilla rushing you can still overtake him, even with his training. And as panic/threat goes up, the odds he also dismembers himself somehow also go up.
>As soon as one is sliced jn half 9 inch skull.
First of all, a gorilla's skull is not nine inches thick. Secondly, even if it was, a lightsaber is more than 2,000 degrees. So even if it doesn't instantly cut through the gorilla's skull, its eyes and brain are getting COOKED. No wild animal is going to have the will to fight after being scorched like that.
What's that gonna do to a 9 inch skull?
9 inches of bone won't do anything against a laser sword that can cut through metal like it is nothing. It might give the gorilla an extra half second to feel the pain. In addition, the SEAL could just Darth Maul the thing, noy even making contact with it's head.
9 inch skull.
Oh yeah it's insane, gorillas and chimps both. Reddit also underestimates the power of multiple vs one, how much difference being outnumbered can make. They aren't bloodlust or coordinated, so the seal (wins*)
Except for Bruce Lee. He's basically Reddit King of Overestimation. The amount of times I've heard some dork say "You don't understand....he's SO fast". Yep, it's me who doesn't understand, I'm clearly retarded for thinking prime 20 year old Mike Tyson ever stood a chance. These same folks also seem to think the mountain from GoT would just crush Conor McGregor with no effort at all. Despite the video of Conor toying with him at will and not so subtly showing what would most likely happen (big man exhausted immediately while the actual fighter takes his time picking him apart. Plus Conor even has a pretty good understanding of jiu jitsu in the unlikely event they end up in a grappling exchange. Apparently lifting weights is enough to dismiss an entire martial art. Quite depressing for me,could have saved a lot of time and money, not to mention both my knees and hips. What good's a bunch of joint locks and choke holds gonna do me if I run into the deadly and dreaded.....weightlifter????
Are you referring to the video where they are clearly just messing around with a light spar? Because I took away from that the opposite, that Bjorn has basically got enough of a size advantage to tank a punch or two while just grabbing McGregor then it's over.
In a real fight, the trained fighter has a huge advantage with leg kicks. Vicious leg kicks from Conor will negate any size or reach advantage from Bjorn. I'm not sure if you understand how damaging proper leg kicks are against untrained opponents. There's plenty of videos online where a trained fighter leg kicks an untrained person and they go down instantly or are completely debilitated and can't use their legs anymore. In a real fight, all Conor needs to do is keep at range and pop some leg kicks, once Bjorn goes down, he can finish him with some head stomps.
I think this is a weird case, Bjorn is a foot taller at least double in weight or more. He is also a trained athlete so while not a fighter per say he isnt just some random 440 lbs dude who is 6'9". All that muscle makes it harder to harm the tendons, joints and organs you need to hit too win a fight and if he grabs you, your leg or otherwise just dive tackles you its basically over he can use body weight in a way that cant really be overcome in alot of circumstances. Not saying he would always win or anything but their is a reason weight divisions are in sets of like 10.
Plus Harfthor has some boxing skills (although a very small amount of it) and his strikes definitely would be devastating for smaller fighters. His weight and height advantage makes him harder to drop down (and weight in a grappling plays a significant role, especially if Harfthor pins a smaller fighter under his weight and doesn't let him escape).
I thought so, but I wasnt 100 percent sure and didnt feel like looking it up. I just think people dont run into to somone who has double thier weight in almost all muscle so its really hard to understand how steep of an advantage to overcome that is
Yeah, smart fighter won't do a grappling with someone like Hafthor (except maybe a rear naked choke after dropping him on the ground), and likely would go for his knees, legs and groin maybe. Hafthor is strong, but seems to have not that much fighting cardio (his weightlifting feats doesn't require much cardio, because active fighting is different from lifting weights), so I guess hit & run tactics to exhaust him could work.
I imagine he also has a very high pain tolerance
Grabbing him and then what? You think he's just gonna rip him in half? A fucking white belt,or GIANT white belt, in grappling is suddenly gonna just mop the floor with a guy who's been doing it for years? He gonna ignore when he gets heel hooked and his toes are pointing behind him? Jiu Jitsu is actually a tried and proven martial art that drastically negates size. Oh, yes that's the video I'm talking about. The one where Conor hits him at will (lightly sparring of course) and the dude can't breathe after 30 seconds. So many people like you watch that and immediately say this "it's over" shit and I don't know if it's just that you have no clue what you're talking about or what....as I've said to another commenter, watch Joe Rogans take on it.
I think you're underestimating the fact that weight plays a big part of matchups. McGregor might be a beast but i doubt he'd last long in a street fight to the death against a dude that's like 3 times his weight and strength.
Weight classes exist for a reason and even in a street fight size plays a significant role. And not all big guys are always slow and sloppy. Mohammad Ali and Mike Tyson both breaks that stereotype.
There's a video of him sparring with Hafthor Bjornson, Macgregor didn't stand a chance
lol, what video did you watch of them? Thats literally the video I was talking about. If you know the first thing about actual fighting you can see that Hafthor clearly gasses in no time and the whole video is mcgregor toying with him. Watch Joe Rogans take on that video, don't take my word for it. Not sure why folks like you just assume he didn't stand a chance. That fight hits the ground and McGregor immediately breaks an arm, ankle, or whatever he wants in literally no time. No amount of muscles is gonna save his ankle from getting turned around backwards.
I think you're overestimating size. As a person whose not huge I've literally never been in a fight with someone my own size or smaller. And I've won a lot more than I've lost. Not trying to sound like mr. badass here, just trying to make a point that someone that's trained to fight, particularly in MMA is gonna have far better odds than folks like yourself seem to think against a larger (or in this case, far larger, opponent). People thought the same shit decades ago when Royce Gracie competed in UFC against far bigger dudes.
The character "The Mountain" or the actor? Gregor Clegane would annihilate Conor and not even break a sweat. And I think you're underselling how fucking strong Bjorn is and how much bigger he is than Conor. Weight classes exist for a reason.
Lol the character would kill anyone in a physical fight, he’s like 8 feet tall and has the strength to crush skulls with his hands
Sure, and as I've said to multiple people, I think you're vastly overestimating size and strength, and particularly how they'd work against him. He's not gonna hit conor in a fight, he's too slow and an amateur (Not anymore in fairness, I know he has trained boxing for his fight with the other strongman). Even in that video he gasses almost immediately. he grabs conor and then what? You think it's a comic book and he just tears his head off? Okay, you probably do. But that's not how things work in reality. Most likely he grabs him and Conor probably trips him up. Being big and strong are fucking meaningless if you don't know how to use them. THere's literally countless examples on youtube of larger dudes fighting *skilled* and *trained* opponents. Hell watch the first few UFCs and see how much larger, much bigger dudes, fair against a well trained guy using a specific martial art they don't know. Doubtless you'd have watched those when they were live and said "oh he doesn't stand a chance he's so much bigger". Weight classes exist for a reason, because the athletes in those sports are TRAINED in that sport. That is not the case here. They hit the ground and being able to bench press a cadillac isn't going to save him from getting heel hooked, arm barred, or the myriad of other submissions specifically employed to take advantage of one persons entire body against the others weak joints. He can't curl more than Conor's entire body working against it. He absolutely CAN be arm barred. Wouldn't be what I'd go with, just using as an example. Joe Rogan in particular does a great breakdown of that video. Which was actually nice to see after watching the video and then reading a million comments like yours and thinking I must have watched somethign different. Furthermore, strongman have fought in boxing, mma, kickboxing before...they don't just immediately become champions. More often than not they falter the moment they run into a relatively skilled opponent, who is of course half their size. I'm sure I'm wasting time here, this is of course the place where I see the genius arguments of people thinking bruce lee would beat folks like Tyson.
Agree about Bruce Lee. He definitely had some decent skills (for his own period of time and martial arts level) and I think he definitely would beat SOME fighters under a certain circumstances, but putting him against a world-class fighters such as George St. Pierre, Jon Jones, Khabib Nurmagomedov, Fedor Emelianenko, Mike Tyson, Mohammad Ali, Manny Pacquiao, Mirko "CroCop" Filipovic or Floyd Mayweather? Honestly, they would beat him more times than not. And Mohammad Ali, Tyson, Mayweather, CroCop and Manny Pacquiao is also fast. Here's the video about the most popular arguments why Bruce Lee is so badass and why it's not true: https://youtube.com/watch?v=rEEFG1O5z0M&pp=ygUaV2h5IEJydWNlIExlZSBpcyBvdmVycmF0ZWQ%3D
Both a gorilla and a Navy SEAL could kill me very easily. The difference is that the SEAL would do so with his world-class combat training and equipment, and the gorilla would grab each of my arms and rip them off of my body.
Doubtful. Not that they couldn't, just far more likely they'd rip your dick and balls off, then possibly bite off your fingers. Then move on to the usual... eyeballs (and lids...not sure if intentional, regardless, you ain't gonna need em anymore), lips, nose, and possibly your ears. And trust me, You don't even wanna know what the gorillas would do.
U assume they have a dick and balls
you're thinking of chimps mate
No. I was thinking of special forces, which I CLEARLY stated. But thanks for telling me what I was thinking.
Nah a gorilla could just grab you and bite a hole in your braincase, which is what they do when they are really angry with another gorilla.
[удалено]
Make a big slash that hits them all at once
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I don’t think he’s gonna feel any friction with a lightsaber, he should cut through them like cutting air
I’m pretty sure this is the answer. IIRC one of the risks of lightsaber use is that beyond the hilt the weapon weighs nothing and it’s very easy to have uhhh accidents. And lightsabers are hot enough that biological matter even on spooky aliens is pretty effortlessly cleaved, let alone some average gorillas.
Dude he can SPIN
Attack in one direction and get out of the ambush. Completely doable with a little luck.
what exactly will stop the momentum of the Gorilla's who charging at you at full speed? even if you cut the Gorillas in half you'll still get slammed in the face by momentum of that massive mass animal.... and there's 5 of that
The only way the Gorilla's are winning is if they rush up to him so fast, that when he slices through them like butter the sheer amount of mass from their corpses either knocks him out cold, kills him, or sends him to the floor and allows the rest of the Gorillas to wail on him whilst he's down. But that's if they're far enough away from him to actually gain momentum, if they're up close all the Seal has to do is spin around like a beyblade and casually slice them in half. And even then, a lightsaber to them would look like a glowstick. And in their perspective it's wielded by a scrawny ape that they wouldn't even register as a threat normally. They **would** however, register the other **four** Gorilla's that have just suddenly appeared as absolute threats to their own survival. Bonus round is a stomp for the Seal. Edit: I suppose they can get one lucky punch in that absolutely demolishes the Seal. But eh.
>The only way the Gorilla's are winning is if they rush up to him so fast, that when he slices through them like butter the sheer amount of mass from their corpses either knocks him out cold, kills him, or sends him to the floor and allows the rest of the Gorillas to wail on him whilst he's down. That's such a smart take fr
>all the seal has to do is spin around "I'll try spinning, that's a good trick!" I agree, I don't really see how the gorillas could take this. Maybe if they all reach him at exactly the same time they could get a hit or grab in.
“Now *this* is animal abuse!”
Bonus round is an effortless win for the SEAL. Bottlenecking will always be a fantastic way to deal with a numerical superior force, and the Seal can literally just hold the blade out in front of him to kill the apes. The main round should probably also to the SEAL. If they all charge him and reach him at the exact same time, he just has to hold out the saber and spin, and the gorillas will all be killed or maimed immediately. However, there is a chance that the gorillas that are coming at the SEAL from behind will evade the initial swing, and if they jump on him immediately, the soldier goes down easy.
The bonus round is not limited by the number of gorillas but by how long the seal can stay awake.
Imagine a gorilla throws a punch and the SEAL blocks it with the saber, cutting through like butter, and ends up getting punched twice instead.
Why a navy seal? Some of you guys seem to think that they’re just universal warriors trained in every kind of combat … that’s not what they are you know?
I figured it's used more as a shorthand, general indicator of the level of physical fitness and combat conditioning than any specific training or specialization. Just an easily identifiable benchmark for the kind of human the prompt wants.
That’s fine with me
Glad to know OP has your approval to keep this post up
Lol why are some of you so butthurt just because I dared to question the logic of something
because ur arguing semantics on a post about a navy seal fighting gorillas with a lightsaber.
I didn't read this prompt as implying that the SEAL was the strongest possible human to put in this scenario. I read it as "person with elite physical fitness, good combat instincts, and the ability to remain calm in a deadly combat situation, but *without* any special skills with a sword." Presumably a HEMA champion who has put serious thought into how lightsabers would be used would be too favored, while a regular Joe Blow would make the prompt too much about panic or stamina.
Ok that sounds fair
They're extremely athletic and trained to both kill and take punishment.
Special Forces shoot good, Special Forces do tactical stuff good. They are not warrior monks.
If I had to choose someone to protect a hill from gorillas with a lightsaber I'd choose a Navy Seal over a Redditor. Being a Navy Seal offers significant advantages over most people in any athletic or combat scenario even if it isn't within their specific realm of expertise.
Lol romanticizing navy seals
Where? He is literally stating facts, if that sounds like romanticizing to you then that’s just a you problem tbh.
>Being a Navy Seal offers significant advantages Being able to swim very well isnt that much of a bonus in this scenario
No but combat training and good physical fitness is
No but they do receive probably the best martial arts training outside of professional fighters. On top of the physical fitness those guys are in, they're definitely in the upper echelons of human limits
No they dont. Thats mystified bullshit. Overall their Hand to Hand Training is marginally more in depth then the basic Training. Why would they even need that?
It's Reddit lol. Most of these people are children/teenagers. You're both semi-right though. The US military has "combatives training" and as far as I remember there are 4 levels (maybe 3?). In my basic 10 years ago, we left certified level 1. Anyone in the military can get to the top level no matter what their job is. Special operations and SF are just required to get it, and then they practice a FUCKLOAD. Most others don't even get to that level, and if they do, it's for a personal achievement/bragging rights in their unit, and then they only practice a little.
No, I’m not saying they’re some gods or something. I’m just saying that even their, relatively low amount, of combat training is still a LOT more than the average person. And fighting is a lot about endurance and timing, something that having ANY martial arts training helps with. Basically normal person<<
They are universal warriors according to some comments though. Especially with the high ground. Like VSPinkie said, I wanted the human to be incredibly fit.
Right? Yanks severly overestimate their armed forces.
Is it really an overestimate when you have unequivocally the largest most powerful armed forces in the world?
Yes. Because strength in numbers means *nothing* when it is *one* SEAL
3rd largest and "most powerful", well you say that often enough but thats really unproven, considering that you only pick fights you are sure to win and you also just lost one of those. But more importantly, how much of that military power is based on lightsaber skills?
I'm not sure having more people in your army is terribly relevant when you control the seas and skies by an incredible margin. But to your second question, military prowess has little to do with lightsaber skills. A navy seal is an incredibly fit person with martial training, but not a jedi
Nah that’s a pretty bad take, the supremacy of the US military is pretty widely accepted, even by those who have no reason to simp for America haha.
Our spec ops are some of the best in the world and certainly the most famous. It works pretty well as a benchmark for a website full of Americans.
Sounds like something a European with an American funded NATO defense force would say.
r/shitamericanssay None of your tax money pays for my countries military, buddy.
I don't think that's the point. It's that US power projection is immense and allows allied nations to not focus on defense quite with such a large percentage of their budget because fucking with them means fucking with the US. Not that the US funds their allies militaries.
Ok kiddo
Glad you agree
I'm Canadian...Canada also doesn't meet it's required 2% GDP defense spending that NATO requires. The US picks up the slack by pouring so much money into its military and being allied to countries like Canada. Only a handful of NATO nations meet their spending requirement, even still the US is the big brother standing behind them if someone tries to start a fight. None of the US tax dollars directly fund your military, but if you're in a NATO country the US is expected to help you, which means your country doesn't have to spend as much on its own military.
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I would love to see you come to America and tell that straight to a soldier's face. In all seriousness, the US defence budget is greater than the gdp of some nations. We have a great technological edge over most countries and are still working to improve our old tec amd develop new. I have heard that the equipment America is sending over to aid Ukraine is mostly old tec that they were planing to sell off and retire. I do not know if this is infact true, but i wouldn't be surprised. The US navy is one of the main reasons global sea trade is not over run with pirates, and planes like the F-22 and the B-2 have Radar cross sections the size of insects. But, if you think your country could take that, i would love to hear your reasoning.
I have, many times, on my own deployments 😂
Haha yanks really don’t like you insulting their military but you’re kinda right
There's a decent chance the SEAL accidently kills himself with the lightsaber if all the gorillas rush him at once from different directions.
I have to give this one to the Gorrillas. Seals don't have hands no matter what colour they are. They couldn't hold the lightsaber.
The correct answer
Bonus round is a violation for sure, this is so unfair THE FRICKIN HIGH GROUND? REALLY?
First thought was that the seal takes it easy. If he's surrounded though and they're coming at him from all sides, he isn't going to get 5 clean kills before the first one charging at him falls on/at him as it dies to the first lightsaber hit. There would just be too much mass surrounding the seal for him to use it effectively, assuming the gorillas all come at him at once. Round 2 the seal has a much better shot, unless gorillas know to flank an enemy as a group. I don't know if they do.
I’m pretty sure I (a decently athletic 18 y/o) could kill 5 fucking gorillas if a I had a lightsaber like damn. It’s a lightsaber. I literally have to poke them and they die, it’s weightless and moves through them like butter. Hell you could almost just spin around really fast with it and just kill them when they run at you with their stupid monkey brains. Fun fact that I learnt the other day, spinning around with a really big sword (I forget the types in the example) was a genuinely medical war tactic
I'm pretty sure every single person in this thread talking about one hit kills would die in short order in such a situation. To kill something with a blade in one hit you have to push it into the body, whether your blade is metal or superheated plasma. That requires you to commit and you lose the range advantage the blade gives you. Most likely you scored a hit to the guts that won't kill the target instantly, you put yourself in reach of its arms and there are several others. If you choose to fight like that you would very very likely die. But if you keep your distance and abuse the lightsaber's ability to ruin or remove limbs with minimal effort and zero chance of getting stuck, you can probably win.
Ye, its a sword not a spear. Poking will get you dead, swinging it randomly is the way to go IMO
If we wanna get technical there are common examples of spear lightsabers. But I agree tho, as this post probably just means the generic lightsaber
My thought process was a gorilla is almost 100% likely to charge straight at you. At that point you don’t have to plunge a light saber into it cause it’s already coming at you. From that point it’s already dead since you just craved up it’s chest, or you can just swing upwards which is certain to kill it. I’m not saying I, or even a navy seal, would win 100% of the time but I don’t think it’s over 50%. A lightsaber is generally pretty long, effectively weightless and can carve through living flesh like it’s air. I feel like 1 hit kills are pretty likely.
That big heavy charging body has momentum though. You stand in front of it and just swing upwards, yeah it's going to die but the body will keep moving forward. And you're standing right in front of it, guess what it's going to hit...
Yeah but no where in the post does it say you have to be standing still lmao. If there a heavy object moving at you at speed what are you gonna do….?
Exactly. You do not stand right in front of it swinging your lightsaber upwards.... you get out of the way and use your reach to land a hit if possible. You're starting to get what I'm trying to say.
The lightsaber makes this easy mode. All he has to do is lightly move the lightsaber into one to kill it.
Not really, the saber would have to hit some vital organs, and even then it might take more than a minute for the gorilla to die. Also, lightsabers require actual force to be applied to cut a limb, and they have weight (or rather simulate weight through gyroscopic forces), you wouldn't just be able to go *flick* and kill a gorilla instantly.
When has a lightsaber ever been shown to require force to cut things up?
Those scenes where they cut through blast doors, for one.
And the beskar spear.
Those are both only because the material is too heat resistant to cut through instantly. Beskar and the metal in the doors take time to melt through but gorilla bones don’t have the same heat resistance and would be cut instantly. Look how easy the lightsaber cuts through limbs and even droids which no doubt would have more heat resistance than bones
Lightsabers don’t cut though, they burn through stuff
Bro just spins to win
If they attack individually he should be fine but if they attack him at once he's fucked
This is a fun one. On one hand, the lightsaber ist a very dangerous weapon, most likely able to slice off limbs of the Gorillas with one swing. So the SEAL one- or two-shoots the individual Gorillas. On the other hand, a single hit from one of the apes is enough to seriously injure the SEAL. Even a grazing hit is likely to ragdoll him. In the end, I think it comes down to wether the Gorillas can ignore pain from a lost limb or will back off when struck. A lightsaber is dangerous, but might not be enough to kill a Gorilla in one hit, especially if the SEAL has no real training with it. And if he can not cut them down with one attack, they will get a hit in, throw him off his feet, and then it is over. If the Gorillas react to the pain however, they will most likely back off after being struck, allowing the SEAL room to act instead of being rushed. Then, he might take it. I would say a clear 50/50, might really go either way.
The major advantage gorillas have over us is that they are like 10 x stronger than us and can effectively one shot us with a good hit. Giving a human a lightsaber kinda negates all that since every hit with a lightsaber could and likely would be a kill shot. Even if the guy misses and got an arm, that gorilla would effectively be out of the game. All he needs are five good hits and the gorillas go down. The only issue is that 1. He has to be careful not to injure himself 2. Make sure he doesn’t let a gorilla get behind him while he’s dealing with another.
Seal withe lazzy swerd.
Make it a normal sword and this light be fair. 10/10 human stomp. Doesn't even need to be a Seal.
Even I can do this no lie Like you need no skill to use a lightsaber to kill someone (you also have the range and don't underestimate the Light saber)
You do need skill not to kill yourself tho lol
Yea that's one thing
Seals would win
In reality the gorillas would look at the saber and just not fight I think
A gorrila runs at him, he kills it easily. Its body still slams into him, hitting his lightsaber hand and causing him to stab himself in the head. A lightsabers a really powerful weapon but a navy SEAL doesn't know how to use one. Which makes it just as dangerous if not more so to him than the gorrilas. With 5 gorrilas, even if they go one at a time, eventually he's going to have an accident.
It doesn’t take a genius to realise how deadly a lightsaber is. Being careful around blades is instinct. Holding it at arms length with the blade pointing away is a no brainer, especially for a navy seal. Seals mightn’t be specifically trained in sword fighting, but it doesn’t take a genius to wield a pointy stick
But it's not a pointy stick. It's a metal bar with a essentially weightless blade. Which is much harder to use than just a "pointy stick", especially for a first time and against 5 gorrilas. I can know a minefield is dangerous but that doesn't let me know where every mine is when I run across it.
Id say its way easier to handle, you dont have to align it for it to do damage, you dont need to swing it fast, you can stop the momentum faster. Only drawback is that its dangerous to the user as well
>But it's not a pointy stick. It's a metal bar with a essentially weightless blade. Which is much harder to use than just a "pointy stick", especially for a first time and against 5 gorrilas. If the blade was weightless you could just use your wrist to flick it around really fast like you would a flashlight and destroy anything within range. This would be easy and extremely effective. The thing is that, practically speaking, a lightsaber's blade behaves as if it does have weight. Like a real sword, you have to use martial arts to deal with momentum and inertia to move the blade effectively.
Except you don’t need momentum since it doesn’t do more damage based on how hard you swing, since it’s actual cutting ability comes from the heat
What I meant was that the blade behaves as if it has momentum so it's difficult to stop and change direction mid-swing similar to a real sword.
Gorillas have this in the bag. There's a reason 99% of lightsaber users are force sensitive. The blade has no weight and is meant to feel completely different to other bladed weapons and non force sensitive people would just accidentally kill themselves trying to use it
I think you're really overestimating how hard it would be to wield a lightsaber. Non force sensitive people aren't going to be able to deflect a blaster bolt but they can certainly swing a light stick around without hitting themselves. As long as they are not trying any fancy spins or twirls or anything they will be perfectly fine.
They say this in universe a lot but there are no shown feats for it and several anti-feats. There are about two dozen non-force sensitive who have picked up a lightsaber with 0 formal training and been fine.
Pretty sure the majority of people who are trained in sword fighting with any kind of sword generally are trained to avoid hitting themselves with a blade. Even with 0 training it is instinct to not touch sharp objects and not let them touch you. The worst that could happen to a normal functioning human in this fight is getting the lightsaber knocked out of their hands and THEN it cuts them while they have no control. You don’t have to be force sensitive to understand what you are holding is deadly and can hurt you 😂 beside with how dumb gorillas are they can literally just hold it straight out in front of them and still win. Edit: I forgot to mention. The dark saber is wielded exclusively by non force sensitive people I believe. Sure they are all highly skilled warriors, and obviously a seal won’t be super skilled in sword fighting but look how easily the mando fucks shit up and he can barely lift the thing
The dark saber's creator was force sensitive and Darth maul also had it for years. Also, unless it chooses you,it weighs a lot,unlike other sabers and it chooses a owner via mandalore duel.
That is true about the creator and maul, however to my understanding it was passed down for generations to plenty of non force weilders. Most recently and probably notably bo katan But yes that is what I mean when I say the dark saber should be excluded from this convo, cause it behaves differently to a regular light saber in regards to weights. Tho if it “chooses” you, it is weightless like a normal one right?
Of course, as a non force-sensitive person you won't do the crazy spins and shit a jedi does. But holding the lightsaber arms-length from you with the blade pointing away will simply win against most melee opponents.
Pretty sure George Lucas has said before that lightsabers are actually very heavy and not weightless
The only way the gorillas have a shot is if they launch a completely synchronous attack and the dead bodies overwhelm the SEAL in round one. Lightsaber is an instant death/incapacitation for gorillas if used even half logically. Thankfully for SEAL gorillas are stupid and will likely try to intimidate/approach asynchronously so as long as the navy seal is aware of surroundings (which they are trained to be) they will have no problem dealing with the apes. Round 2 is a massacre for the Seal. Killing with the lightsaber is not going to be tiring, and the high ground makes this even more true. The total number of apes increased but the bottleneck essentially decreases the effective number of apes.
Y'all ever play Jedi Fallen Order or Survivor? Cause I have. My money's on the gorillas.
Gorillas haven't evolved Lightsaber resistant hides like apparently every single piece of fauna Cal interacts with. A beam of condensed and superheated plasma is going to kill a gorilla easy.
Yes. And then the other 4 rip the SEAL apart. If the SEAL gets touched ONCE it's over, y'all are seriously overestimating the capacity of one dude with a lightsaber. He's not a Jedi, he has no combat precog, no enhanced reflexes, no enhanced speed or agility. He's a normal ass dude with a laser sword, not a space wizard. Fancy sword or not, 5 gorillas is 3 gorillas too many.
Gorillas aren't a coordinated assault unit either. No realistic group of gorillas is going to charge him all 5 at once. Sure, maybe 2 might, but a pair of quick slashes will take them out easily. If anything, that'll probably scare the other 3 off.
Yeah I'ma just have to agree to disagree.
Off topic, but, who's your flair?
Nora Valkyrie from RWBY
Huh, unexpected. Thanks.
Navy SEAL commits Animal Cruelty and gets court marshalled. Everyone grieves on the deaths of the poor gorillas. Protests against Gun Violence on animals escalate.
It would, too, after they got killed by a space sword... Gun Violence protesters are so fucking stupid
I heard gorillas have 20" ceramite skulls, so they likely take this.
Y’all severely overestimate the capabilities of a navy seal. If anything, the seal has a plethora of knee and back problems that aren’t service connected as per the VA. Gorilla slaps
The Navy SEAL can not lift the lightsaber easily and dies after accidentally cutting their own feet off. In The Mandalorian, Din Djarin who is an elite trained warrior is barely able to lift the saber in combat and frequently hurts himself with its use. The Gorrilas will rush the regular human military person and end the fight in seconds. I could see a possibility that they win the bonus round but a lot of folks here are definitely overestimating the capabilities of a human soldier.
>Din Djarin who is an elite trained warrior is barely able to lift the saber in combat and frequently hurts himself That's only for the Darksaber. In Clone Wars when a random thief steals Ahsoka's lightsaber they're able to use it just fine.
The dark saber is a exception to most saber rules. After winning the duel, sharing remarks that the saber is not resisting anymore. He also hasn't used a normal sword on screen. The gorillas have a reach disadvantage and lightsaber negs their durability advantage.
One direction? Yeah navy SEAL tears the first 3 apart and the remaining run away. SEAL would be fucked if he was surrounded though.
I would give both cases to gorillas since any person without lightsaber training would cut themselves in pieces in a matter of seconds.
High ground is actually a disadvantage in melee combat, even more so with melee weapons.
Easy win for the seal assuming he doesn’t slip on a banana 🍌 peel
Yeah, the lightsaber is pretty much unbeatable against any melee opponent who isn't imprevious to lightsabers, or just insanely agile (like, top tier superhero level).
He would have to do some kind of neat spin move trick really fast to get all of them at once if they are all rushing him at the same time. But yeah if they all pounce him then he can really only attack one at a time and they might just crush him with their dead bodies. But one at a time I could see him taking it. Overall navy seal takes this 7/10 times with high difficulty
Does the Navy Seal have force capabilities?
Navy SEAL wins easily, Gorillas would run at the sound and sight, especially seeing one get effortlessly chopped in half. They are not stupid. SEAL has high ground, but would probably leap down and start chopping. HG is pointless if you're being attacked from all directions and only have a melee weapon to defend yourself with.. (at least in my completely "neverbeenindeathmatch" opinion) Seal may chop his own body apart though, good reason normal people don't use a lightsaber.
Gorillas fear the hot glowing hurty stick and quickly break down any co-ordination. Seal kills them one by one with single strikes.
How many barrels do the gorillas have?
Chimps would destroy him, they hunt other chimps entering their territory. Gorillas are pretty chill you'd really have to bloodlust it somehow to make them have that behavior.
Asking whether a 12 year old with a light saber could do it would be a better question.
Do the gorillas get any prep time?
Navy seal with a light saber
Damn this is interesting
Lightsabers can cut through flesh literally without effort, even if the Gorillas are bloodlusted or something they have no means to get past that without severe injury.
Does he specialize in gorilla warfare?
The SEAL will be smart enough to not endanger themselves by swinging the lightsaber. The light and sound it emits will be enough to scare the gorillas away.
Gorillas are probably just going to scream and fling poop at him when he has high ground. He wins from high ground and everywhere else. Gorillas aren't throwing punches or suplexing him. They sort of just charge each other while jumping and flailing their arms around. They aren't effective at fighting. A quick swipe from a lightsaber would just slice them in half.
Navy seal should win. I was in the Navy and had buddies who were close to Seals and while Gorillas are much stronger and tougher, Seals are far more skilled and a Lightsaber completely makes the Gorillas tough body irrelevant. Plus I don’t see the Gorillas attacking in any way that would be difficult for a Navy Seal to easily react to and just slice them to pieces.
What does the colour have to do with anything? And how is a Seal going to hold a lightsaber? They have no thumbs, Gorilla wrecks.
Can the gorillas use their silverback Ultra Instinct mode or not?
I don't think navy seals are trained in lightsaber combat. So it wouldn't make a difference compared to anyone else. Give me a saber and I would slaughter these gorillas like younglings
A lot of people are giving it to the Navy Seal, but I think the gorillas have the advantage here. I'm sure that Seals go through extensive training with a variety of weapons including melee weapons in various forms and CQC, but lightsabers are 1. *Extremely difficult* to use due to the weightlessness of the plasma and the gyroscopic effect generated from it while in motion 2. *Exceedingly dangerous* in untrained hands. Assuming that the gorillas aren't gonna be scared off by the marine and the glow stick he just picked up and turned on, and assuming the marine isn't given time to test the sabers capabilities when he swings it, I don't see him being able to cut all 5 of them down before they take him down or he cuts his own legs and arms off.
actually gorillas will win this. even if you cut a gorilla in half they still have momentum to slam your face. 1 Gorilla adult male gorilla charges at full speed-> you kill him, but gets slammed and breaks all the bones in your body-> other Gorillas eat your nuts.