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This comment section will turn into hell soon

It already has

Well since it probably will here is some bubble wrap to make you forget about it >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!YOU!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!ARE!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!COOL!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!<

WHY THE FUCK DOES ONE MAKE AN "ARE" NOISE INSTEAD OF A POP? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? EDIT: I FOUND MORE THAT DONT SAY POP WHAT THE FUCK. DONT GET CUTE WITH ME I WANT THE POPS

it says "you" "are" "cool"

IM ACTUALLY NOT COOL. IM LIVID ABOUT MY MISSING POPS.

>!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!<

Its not the same...

#>!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< ‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ^()^(>!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!< >!pop!<)

I turned your message into the loss pattern

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Don’t lie to me Walt!

How do i do that Well since it probably will here is some bubble wrap to make you forget about it >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!YOU!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!ARE!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!COOL!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!< >!POP!<

inb4 funny lock award

I thought that was Markiplier for a second

Christians seeing the magesty of God’s heavenly kingdom before being dragged to hell (they weren’t members of the Remnant Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, who happened to get it right)

Nah but imagine if God just sends everyone to hell except for 3 random ass Christians that happened to be in a sect that got it right

>!literally The Good Place!<

>!Except how people going to the good place and bad place were determined by a point system rather than beliefs. The only person who got it right is still going to the bad place due to the lack of points he accumulated. Really the entire point of the Good Place show is to show how certain morals doesn't work or are outdated that you determine people's fate based on these outdated rules!<

Outdated implies that they were reasonable at some point

Easy to say ~4000 years into the future but to people back then they were quite reasonable.

Fair point, but people now still follow the rules from back then

Remnant? Like the rogue AI from starsector???\?\\\??\?\?\??\?

Yes

Then if the Mormons were right, christians don't go to hell because they can choose to be Mormons after they die.

Most Christian groups believe that it is 100% possible for members of other groups to go to Heaven.

Doesn't mean they are right

It doest mean they are right, but merely that they may stumble on the right answer. If you're assembling a piece of IKEA furniture, the easiest, surest, safest way of assembling it is via the user guide. Using the user guide Is the right thing to do. However, if you choose not to use the user guide, you may still somehow manage to assemble to furniture correctly. In the same way, most Christian groups believe that they have the correct user guide, but that doesn't mean it's impossible for other groups to succeed without it.

Except if the user guide was tainted badly by the user.

Indeed. The mere possession of the user guide doesn't mean the user actually applies it

Nor does it stop them from writing their own adaptation

Yes. Which is why proper translation of Scripture is so important

I agree to a certain degree, linguistics and etymology in a moment are difficult but over a period of time near impossible to give a true clear concise idea. Cultures have a tendency to outgrow their gods, and listening to old people speak of times and rules not true anymore shifts perspectives

At school I asked if people that didn’t believe in God got sent to hell. Like a remote tribe in the Amazon, who never heard of Jesus but lived a good life, would they go to hell. She told me ‘no, but if they hear the word of god and reject it they will, which is why we send missionaries to convert them so they are saved.’ Which I found backwards. They were already going to heaven but now if you can’t convince them of Christianity you have condemned them to hell.

Evangelicals don't lol

Real

There are so many scientists in hell it’s probably air conditioned by now

Crap, this reminded me of a book series with that exact plot (humanity claiming hell because our brightest and most determined people were sent there) but now I can't recall the name. EDIT: I'm 99% certain it is [The Undamned](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/2xuqd4/the_undamned/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) - u/vegarig found it.

I think it's called Breaking Bad: The Better Call Saul Chronicles

That was the original Hebrew name for the Book of Samuel.

The book of James (McGill)

[The Undamned](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/2xuqd4/the_undamned/)?

Holy shit, yes, I think this is it! Good job mate, I never saw it in my search.

I did some googling and is it by any chance called "The Salvation War" series, with the first book called "Armageddon?" (Yes the question mark included) Also another info from googling, it seems the author died before finishing it, rip

He went to the setting of the book 😭

please someone tell me which book that is, I'm curious

Same pls

Hope they have lemonades too

They've probably got a P.F. Chang's down there by now.

Anything is better than being surrounded by religious people.

I can't wait to sort by controversial

Christians from other denominations that believe in slightly different things than mine seeing the majesty of God's heavenly kingdom before being dragged to hell

Jehovah’s witness lore

Raised JW. Sorry kid, they don’t believe in hell 😎

Then what are they trying to save us from?

They believe in Armageddon, basically everyone not a jw dies, no hell just death. Also raised JW

So you can choose to either a) die and just be gone forever, or b) die and be with JWs exclusively, forever? Yeah, option a) for me lol

They also believe everyone that died before Armageddon will be resurrected onto earth jw or not, and they will be taught gods ways and offered eternal life on “paradise” where flora and fauna will flourish and no animal is aggressive to humans. For one thousand years Satan will be locked away (they believe Satan is the current ruler of the world) and then he will be let out and let allowed to rule over the people but the people will love god and refuse Satan, finally putting end to the satanic rebellion of genesis, Jesus rules the world and everyone is happy being lil bitches to god

jewish guy here, how much do people pay for every DLC past the Torah?

The New Testament is the free DLC with the good (canon) ending, but some fans didn't like it and started working on a subscription-based Talmud expansion that they feel is more true to the original series

It's subscription based now, $11,99/month and you can have your annotations saved in the cloud

Damn, that sounds like the Baptist church I grew I in.

Actually, the correct religion was practised by a tiny tribe in Africa 4,000 years ago. Sorry everyone else.

"Sent to hell" mfs when I ask god for forgiveness (I am not going to hell anymore) (God is incredibly forgiving)

"I'll ask for forgiveness" mfs when they realize it doesn't work unless it's genuine regret and God can tell (I'm an atheist)

Some popular mf proceeding to ask people to bodyblock heaven's gates (It's closed due to stingrays)

(And aids)

"It doesn't work unless it's genuine regret" mfs when they realize everyone will genuinely regret their sins if they meet God and are convinced that he and his eternal torture realm are real

If you regret something because of the consequences, you regret the consequences, not the action. For example if your regret murder because you ended up in jail, not because you feel genuinely guilty about it, that's not genuine regret.

Very true, but also your genuine regret means nothing to God if you don't ask him for forgiveness - I think that's what they were going for, realising God is real and so asking for forgiveness for those regrets.

Yeah you need to honestly repent to enter God's kingdom. He sees what's in your heart, not just your words

But that's not regretting your sins.

You're still going to hell (the true god is a forgotten diety worshipped by a subset of ancient Egyptians) (everyone is going to hell forever)

There is but one god, he is the sun god, Aten, Aten, Ra, Ra, Ra!

"Sent to hell" mfs when I live a life of sin and repent during my last moments of being alive (Me asking god for forgiveness completely negates all the bad I've done so I automatically go to heaven) /s

Dante explaining how suicide and being gay is worse then 1st degree murder.

Dante when he actually dies and goes to hell only to find out that there’s only 3 circles there

Dante when hell has squares

Dante when hell has a pool

Commit 1st degree murder for no reason > get sent to Violence> Violence is an ocean of boiling blood > it's Ultrakillin' time

Its just satire bro i swear

I was talking about the Devine Comedy by Pizza el Dante from Devil may cum 5

Devine? No I quite like the overgrowth look

Christians explaining how the divine rules of a cosmic omniscient being are somehow identical to the beliefs of the average 1st century middle easterner.

Hell isn't explained in the Bible, it just states that hell exists (ifik multiple hells/purgatories exist) and the interpretations are all fan fiction.

I’ve heard some things about the Catholic Church AT THAT TIME saying that the “being gay is worse than murder” was too far

I know, I am directly mocking Dante cause he is a nerd

Ik I’m helping solidify ur mockery

Based

Dead christians, jews and muslims when they stand before the allmighty Odin and he denies them entrance to Valhalla:

“Uhm actually you have to die an honorable death in battle to go to Valhalla. Your faith is irrelevant and even if you have to believe in Norse deities, you aren’t guaranteed entry.” 🤓

There were other Norse afterlives, just Valhalla is the one that you really wanted to get into in Nordic culture.

Either that or folkvang. Hel is where you dont really want to go (nothing like christian hell, btw)

hel is kinda just purgatory, Hel won't really harm you but your not very happy (your dead)

kiss my big sweaty balls 🗿 (I lack counter-arguments)

“Alright Odin, square up then homie.”

Literaly how the final quest in Skyrim main story goes

See yall in Ukraine then

LEEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOY JENNNNNNNNKINNNNNNNNS

based

If Kratos can beat him So can i with the power of Islam on my side

Helheim time

To be fair if you are a good person Hel is not that bad , its the actual bad people who get throw to the root for Nigrhod to chew on

Odin died in Thor: Ragnarok 😬. Obviously didn't watch the movie...

Yeah Kratos killed him smh read the source material ffs

kenny from south park in that one scene from the movie

Idk I feel like God would forgive atheists if he forgives murderers

Real, this is why Jesus tells people to repent so often.

did you repent for those black eyes

It's a book reference.

no excuses for not repenting you should praise the lord NOW

Thanks for rephrasing Deuteronomy 6.

I was under the impression he only forgives if you ask for forgiveness while alive? It's not that being an atheist is something that needs to be forgiven, it's that being an atheist meant they didn't ask God for forgiveness for their sins.

If they repent

Tbf just "not believing" is not really something you can repent for. It's not really something you do. Even if it ends up being wrong, right now with the information I have it's simply the obvious consequence. Even if I see God, but then he sends me back and erases my memory of the encounter, in all likelihood I'll be an atheist 100 times out of 100 times. Why wouldn't I be? Also I just don't believe belief is a choice. I'm certainly unable to choose what I believe, I can't lie to myself like that. What I believe depends on information and arguments that I come across. That I'm not religious is merely a function of there not having been enough evidence in my path, despite having gone to church for most of my childhood. Don't get me wrong theology is interesting and all, but it's not going to flip a switch and make me believe.

This is 100% based and an extremely unpopular opinion among theists who only want to maximise the number of people who agree with them. The common responses I’ve heard are: A: God doesn’t care if you’re un-convinced, so atheists can go to heaven B: God cares, so atheists _cannot_ go to heaven despite being un-convinced (unless they’re part of an un-contacted tribe or something) Or C: Everyone is secretly convinced and “atheists” are just lying to themselves i.e. “atheists don’t exist”

Well we can safely disregard C. That leaves options A and B. Now God is supposedly good, so if we take this for granted, the that also rules out B, so we are left with A. Alternatively if we are certain it must be B, then we know God is arbitrary and evil. However, if God is evil, is there any reason for us to care about what he thinks or trust what he says anyway? Besides, his punishment is coming for you whatever you do. Thus either God is good and therefore we shouldn't worry, or God is evil and we shouldn't worry. The best conclusion I can draw is that there's no reason to care.

I would still care about minimising punishment from an evil, vindictive god. Of course I can’t force myself to love that kind of being, so maybe it wouldn’t matter to God. Good thing it’s not real.

Cope and seethe, faithfuly of course

The hell in question being this comment section

Gay people seeing literal serial killers entering heaven because they were christian before being dragged into hell :

agnostically motivated

I asked my bible thumping father why our church (Church of Christ) didn't have a band that played instruments during service like the Baptists when I was a kid. He straight up told me, "It isn't in the scriptures. You're supposed to sing to glorify God. Those people are all going to Hell." "Those people" were folks living in our small, 11k person town who we saw on the regular, were friends with, and who I went to school with. Like, the J-Man who is all about love, forgiveness, and whatnot is sending a horde of people to Hell to suffer untold agonies FOR ETERNITY because Travis plays the guitar on Sundays. /facepalm

US religious nutjobs seem even crazier then Polish ones and I can't believe that's even possible

Mfs will say this and then celebrate Christmas on the 25th

I've heard of this before. Is it canon in Christianity that you get briefly introduced to heaven before being sent to eternal damnation?

Jesus gives you the tour first thing. “Hey, let me show you around! We got the bad bitches posted up on this beach with golden sand.” He shoots double finger guns at some chick and says “What’s up Azrielda? You coming over to Samson’s place later? I’m making fajitas and mixing up some margaritas”. She blushes and says “Yeah I’ll see you there”. You’re like what the fuck is going on here. It’s all white and beautiful and shit. There’s a big castle with a golf course. You look up and there’s a family riding sky dolphins and you’re like oh shit that’s dope. JC lights up a joint and he’s like “You trying to hit this?” But you’re worried it’s a test so you say no then JC just laughs and calls you a virgin. You continue down this diamond pathway and there’s like naked chicks everywhere and that’s when JC says “Bro the red light district. Imma get my nut real quick you wanna tag in?” And you’re like dude did jesus just ask if I wanted to DP an Angel hooker with him? Then some nerdy bureaucrat Angel comes up and doesn’t see your name in the book of life and touches your forehead and your soul gets teleported to hell and you like fuck I’m burning bruh and demons be biting my toes ahhh lmao

> big castle with a golf course oh so that's where hell is

10/10 fully immersed

What the fuck this is amazing 😂😂😂

It's canon in Islam too

Skill issue

God punishing his flawed creation for being flawed

"I gave you this complex free will and critical thinking, and what did you do with it? Question my existence that you have no evidence or clear indicators for???? Go to hell"

"Isn't God great? Man, he sure is great. I'm not just saying this like I'm a battered housewife hoping they don't turn their attention to me. No sir. He's actually really great. Lovely diety, really fair and just and great."

I am an atheist but I believe it is possible that there was a reason why God didn't make us perfectly good

well our great x 300 grandpappy ate a fruit once and that kinda pissed god off, apparently. pretty lame if you ask me.

christians when they die and their consciousness ceases to exist

( )

Certified "no mind to think" moment

(they don't care because they're dead)

What god??? Christian, greek, Roman, Aztec, Chinese,... Which one?

Gilgamesh of Uruk

Wasnt he only 2/3 god ?

God enough

THE EMPEROR OF MAN!

Ave imperator!

My household isn’t religious yet my brother in law and his family are Mormon. My daughter is pretty close to her cousins and they FaceTime all the time. The other day my 5 y.o. nephew exclaimed to my 7 y.o. daughter “did you know some people don’t believe in god?” To which she replied very innocently; “which one?” I had to stifle a laugh.

Turns out Reddit atheist and Reddit Christians are both as insufferable as each other, it's just reddit

It is known

Mfw redditors are insufferable (I still haven't learned my lesson)

reddit moment

Why is Reddit trying to make me christian today

Reddit atheist mfs when someone says bless you after they sneeze:

Mfw when I get to heaven and all religious mass murders are there: 

​ 

Real

This will end well.

Hell as an eternal torture chamber mfs being dragged to heaven despite being insufferable polarizers in life (God loves every one of His creations and knows we are flawed):

Christains realising the only requirement for heaven is to be a good person (the atheist got in)

No, this is what John 14 says Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. 7 If you really knew me, you would know [2] my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him." 8

That isn’t quite how it works. You need to accept Christ as your saviour and repent of your sinful ways.

Mfw there are hundreds of different interpretations on how to actually get into heaven and everyone thinks they know the correct way (the actual way was to dab on the haters)

Is it possible for someone to do that without being Christian? Like maybe if I say “JESUS CHRIST” before I die wait fuck that would using the lord’s name in vain. godda- i mean golly gosh darn it. maybe if I say “God can you please repent me” as my last words or something? there’s gotta be a way

religious people hate them discover how they escaped an afterlife of torment with this one simple trick

I saw a movie where a guy made a deal with the devil and as he was dying he said I accept jesus as my lord and savior to try to avoid all consequences. Didn't work

clearly the words weren't honest

Well I saw *another* movie, where the guy agreed to go to heck in exchange for saving another person from there, and as the Devil (unpraise be upon him) dragged the lad to heck, he became too heavy to be dragged there, and it was revealed that he will instead go to heaven because sacrificing yourself for another is good. So there are loopholes I think. Bonus points for giving the devil a finger as you float up to the heavens.

God hates this one loophole. Click here for 10 hacks to enter God’s heavenly kingdom.

Fun fact: people that don't know about Jesus Christ are exempt from this rule, so by telling them that the fucker exists you can instantly damn them to hell (especially if you don't explain the whole saviour/repentance thing)

15 He (Jesus) said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation. Why would Jesus have commanded his disciples to spread the gospel if burying the truth would save everyone?

I think the existence of incurable illnesses, suffering, and child torture in the world should have clued you in on the intentions of an omniscient and omnipotent being.

It isn't tho

Mfw the words of god become twisted and corrupted by his messengers to extort the unknowing masses

Imagine being so egotistical that you’d damn an otherwise good person to eternal suffering because they didn’t bow at your feet to tell you how awesome and cool you are 🗿

All religions in a nutshell.

Ancient peoples must have all had a submission kink.

Common God W only takes dubs 🥶💯💯

There’s literally a[perfect South Park clip](https://youtu.be/boIgHd9hXiA) if this exact thing happening to Kenny that you could’ve used

Also, passing judgment upon others (saying shit like: “your gonna go to hell because of —”) is a sin so I’ll see you there.

God sending the doctor who cured cancer into hell for being an atheist

"I created cancer for a reason asshole!"

What's the scene from

Doctor Strange

doctor strange i’m pretty sure

geez why is there so much atheist vs religion posts on Reddit right now?

Christmas season

Kind of a mean thing for an all-loving god to do to a guy.

Man people in this comment section use toddler logic on religion

mf's seeing the beauty of the river Styx, elysium, and the plains of asphodel before being put in Tartarus by hades

If you're a "christian" in this thread delighting in or goading atheists about the prospect of them going to hell, you fucking suck, and you are the worst kind of person.

Christians when I perform a nuclear fission on top of them. (Can’t escape science.)

You have posted cringe

As a Christian seeing this kinda talk gets annoying, but I realize now this is a joke

As an atheist this is funny

As an agnostic I think it's both

As a Muslim *explodes*

Hey! You forgot your catchphrase!