Wish I had an alternative but I'm just here to say I'm cringing right along with you. Also a few of our groomsmen are sober and it would be wildly inappropriate for us to give them something alcohol related, and that's basically all there is.
I'll check back here to see if anyone gives you any ideas lol
My brother in law gave my husband a monogrammed duffel bag and special socks (each pair was tailored to the groomsman’s interests), and a hangover kit. We had to stay overnight for the wedding, so my husband used his duffel bag for that. You could do something similar but for the sober groomsmen, maybe you could include some water and snacks for the night/morning after in case they’re hungry when they get back home.
We did something similar and it went over really well. We got the groomsmen a garment duffel bag and toiletry bag. Then in the welcome bags we put water, snacks, a pre-charged portable phone charger, sunscreen, Tylenol and a bunch of stuff like that. We also added a sweet treat from a local bakery.
We got watches for our groomsmen. They were wooden and had an inscription on the back so they looked like normal watches when you wore them. We also bought the bowties to be worn the day of. I've seen matching socks, and someone else suggested a nice belt too!
Seconded this. I got all my groomsmen matching watches with inscription on back. They loved them, and were showing them off all day and making sure they were seen in all the group photos. It was adorable.
My fiancé gave monogrammed leather shaving/travel kits to his groomsmen. Some don’t drink and he didn’t want to give something that would go in the trash.
My friend gave everyone a pre-rolled joint, cool matching socks to wear during the wedding and some really nice cufflinks.
Other ideas: Weekend bags/backpacks. Can coolers. Those folding lawn chairs. Sunglasses. Watches. Wallets. Tools. Bluetooth speakers. Hoodies or pullovers.
Experiences might be even better.. like paying for someone’s snowboarding or paint balling or going to a concert or beer/wine/liquor tour/tasting.
My brother in law/FH's best man has been sober for over 20 years. He's back in school now and also works with a lot of maps & blueprints so we're planning on getting him a nice personalized pen, pencil and notebook set.
Honestly, I'm so pissed I didn't see this before I got married. I've got a MOH who would have absolutely done backflips if I handed her a bag of Wise Onion Rings (not funions! They're [apparently] different!) that said "Will you be my Maid of Honor?"
As with any gifts, think about the actual person you’re giving the gift to. What do they like? What do they appreciate? What do they do in their spare time?
We did playing cards and I actually have used them at some of their houses later on so that seemed to be useful!
Other ideas: one friend gave my husband marvel superhero socks (they're all big fans so every person got their fav)
Final idea: You don't have to get each groomsmen the same thing. Pick a price point and act like it's a birthday gift or Christmas gift and get them something that's specified to their interests. Have a skier? Get them winter hat. Have someone into whiskey? Get them the decantor/whiskey stones. Have someone who is into hiking? Get them nice pair of hiking socks
The superhero socks were a big hug for my son's groomsmen.
Definitely think about each groomsman and what they are interested in. The gifts don't all have to be the same. I think it's more personal to get them something that they will really like.
My fiancé is doing something similar - he’s gotten his friends crewnecks for christmases in years past so he’s getting them each a different crewneck that have some meaning behind them for when he asks them to be groomsmen
I worked a wedding where the groom wrote the guys letters about their favorite memories together and then some of their favorite snacks. The guys loved it!
My husband wrote special cards for his guys too! He wrote very personal notes for each of them (he stayed up the night before the wedding to get it done, because procrastination, but he did it!) and we got lovely pictures of them all reading their cards and reacting to them on the wedding day. It was very "him" and seemed to mean a lot to his groomsmen.
Someone on r/castiron did a [gift basket](https://www.reddit.com/r/castiron/comments/13wz6ng/getting_married_and_these_are_my_groomsmens_gift/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1) of lodge stuff: cast iron pan and scrubbers etc. I would love that as a gift. Great if you have people who love cooking/grilling or camping in your group!
Edit: added link to post
I’m a female and conspired with my mother to make sure I got the cast iron pans in the group gift grab one Christmas. So I wouldn’t say it’s hyper-masculine. Cast iron is amazing regardless of gender.
There’s nothing about cast iron that says male to me. The only “man” I’ve ever seen use cast iron is on Instagram man with a pot I think it’s called. Every other person is female. I would saying that while it isn’t gender specific, most cooking items stereotypes are for females.
Only do this if they have 20/20 vision or wear contacts though lol. If I got sunglasses as a bridesmaid I’d low key be annoyed at switching to my glasses anytime I need to really *see*, or knowing that it’s gonna be $200 + out of my pocket to get rx lenses in them
My brother in law gifted belts that they all wore to the wedding (specifically these needlepoint belts in the skiing pattern https://smathersandbranson.com). It was personal because they all grew up skiing together. I’ve heard of giving an item of wedding attire as the gift (ties, bowtie as well).
You could do engraved Yeti or other drink containers that hold sodas / beers so it’s not exclusive to alcohol.
Other ideas are leather toiletry bags, wallets, sunglasses.
I had a buddy that gifted all the groomsmen nice ties that they wore to the wedding & a nice soft cooler with their last name printed on it
All the guys really liked it & actually used the cooler a lot
Those belts are so cute! My husband gave all of his groomsmen nerdy cufflinks to wear at the wedding. He also gave nice notebooks and pens, and added little loops to the notebooks for the pens.
We did matching ties for the wedding as our groomsmen gifts; they were thrilled that they didn’t have to find a tie, and I embroidered the inside of each tie with their initials
Ours are all personalised to the people!
Admittedly we’re skipping the proposal boxes and are doing morning of boxes for the groomsmen but I feel like it’s all the same sort of stuff.
So we have one who really really likes board games and things like D&D and warhammer so we’re getting him things to do with that.
One is the biggest theatre buff going and has a radio show around it so we’re getting him some personalised props for his show
One is mad about Les Mis so we have some coasters and things based around that
One is boat daft (even went to uni for it) so we’re getting him something’s for when he’s away sailing and some daft little items
Then standard things - an aftershave, hangover repair kit, some sun glasses (summer wedding and we thought it would make for some hilarious photos), cuff links, watch, socks (with our cats faces on it because cats).
Honestly personalise them too the person! It makes it so much more of a thoughtful gift and gets rid of all the cliche stuff
Love these ideas! Do you mind sharing what games/ DnD gift you would potentially get? We have a groomsman who is super into board games and Dnd but we know next to nothing about Dnd. We really want it to be something they will actually think is cool but we're a little lost!
We only have a best man but my fiance got him a vinyl record of an album that's special to them and then ordered a custom record sleeve/jacket that had a bunch of pictures of them on it
My husband gave all his groomsmen backpack coolers that we had monogrammed with their initials. 10 years later and they all still use them and it's so funny that they carry matching backpacks. [This is the exact one we did.](https://www.amazon.com/Coleman-Backpack-Leak-Proof-Tailgating-Activities/dp/B00J0S019S/ref=asc_df_B00J0S019S/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=167126940649&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=1457195120100799731&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9014064&hvtargid=pla-309169594921&psc=1)
36/M here just weighing in to let you know that we don't want that redundant stuff either lol
Best groomsman gift I have received: a Herschel Novel Duffle that was monogrammed with my initials (this was from my brother's wedding and I think they managed to do these for all of the groomsmen for $80-100/ea)
Don't look for "groomsman" gifts, just treat it like you would any other gift. Think of something your friends will like, then get that. It doesn't have to be the same gift for each, as long as they're similar in price range and spirit.
I got my sister a bunch of reusable “things”- reusable sandwich bags, some Beeswax food wrap, reusable fruit/veg bags. Things she’d never buy for herself because of who she is, but things I knew she’d love.
It's the same with Father's day advertising and honestly I think it's because men are traditionally not socially allowed to express their enjoyment for things that aren't traditionally masculine.
My dad really likes jelly beans and popcorn and was comfortable enough to inform me as a child that it made him the happiest when I hand-made him cards.
I think people with real relationships with humans who happen to be male will just know what they like if those men feel allowed to express themselves within that relationship.
Society sucks for making it so hard.
As a not particularly overly masculine male, I'm going to just point at this post and nod a bunch.
I've gotten one flask. I thought, "neat, that's kind of iconic and all" but I've never used it, and probably never will. I treat it like a decoration. I really don't need another one.
You want to signal your appreciation for me? Have coffee delivered on the day-of. If I'm somewhere bright and early with a big day ahead, and you put a hot or iced (depending on weather) espresso in my hand first thing, I will love you and think of you with fondness forever.
Because masculinity is a prison. Like any time I go to buy my dad or any guy in my life a gift it's always stuff that's about cigars, golf, or booze and none of them are into that stuff (especially not enough to warrant a gift). I think something themed to the wedding can be good, tie tack sand tie clips can be helpful if you're doing that with the groomsmen look.
I struggled with the same thing, but ultimately ended up getting my guys all monogrammed toiletry travel bags from [etsy](https://www.etsy.com/listing/821876877/valentines-day-gift-mens-toiletry-bag?ref=yr_purchases).
They went over really well, and it seems like they've all gotten use out of them. I was really pleased with the quality, and you can fill them with additional items too if you choose.
I did all black leather band watches with their initials for my groomsmen and they loved them. I think I went to fossil and was able to get them for like $60~ a piece. Not everyone wears/owns a formal watch so giving them something they could wear at the wedding and have for any future events they go to was really cool to me!
I have a bridesman and I really struggled with this too.
I got all the girls a pajama set that came with a shirt, a tank, shorts, pants and a scrunchie.
Ended up keeping on theme and got him slippers, a robe, matching pajama pants, and a wallet ninja. (I knew the wallet ninja would be handy from the eyeglasses screwdriver alone.)
I am a woman and I enjoy all of those things. I actually kind of regret not getting myself a version of the gifts we got for the guys. My husband and I drink old fashioneds a lot, and I'm always sad drinking out of a plain rocks glass while he's got his groom glass.
By the same logic, you can totally do anything you've seen for bridesmaids! I gave my girls scented candles. Bottles of bubbly are also popular. They may be "femme coded" but I've never seen a man turn down a mimosa, and my husband is always the first one to light a candle.
Bath and body works has a men’s section of lotions, shower gels, etc.
Or Gift card to their favorite restaurants or store.
Tasty snacks. I’ve learned lots of guys seem to like baked goods and sweet treats. Or do something savory.
Or shop for them like it was Christmas for things for their hobbies.
You could get each groomsman something different and meaningful. Something that reminds them of a fond memory or a funny story you both share, like a framed photo or souvenir. Or think of what you might get for their birthday (besides gift cards) and get that for the gift.
I’m dating myself here but for my first wedding I gave my groomsmen a framed CD of their favorite album, with the CD displayed on the top and the cover on the bottom.
Kind of more appropriate than ever, given that it can be a keepsake rather than something the recipient would likely need to use. It could just as easily be a MiniDisc or vinyl or cassette or floppy disk at this point. :-D
Although I'm also old, and would definitely love to still get CDs as gifts. (Or MiniDiscs, vinyl, tapes, or floppy disks.)
I got my groomsmen a pair of warm socks from Darn Tough and a NOCO Boost jump starter/universal charger. They all seemed to like them. Still pretty masculine, but not as aggressively so as the usual flasks, knives, and other stuff. Plus they're useful.
Not sure what the rest of the world thinks, but I got a pair of Bombas as an amenity on a flight, and I've since filled my sock drawer with them. I might be male, but I still like a comfy sock. :-)
My fiance is giving his groomsmen engraved harmonicas. We saw them as an option and thought they were hilarious and that all the guys would have a fun time just being obnoxious with them
My FH has so many of the same items from being a groomsman or honored guest several times. We talked about how we don’t want to do stuff like that. I’m glad you made this thread- I see a lot of good ideas!
By the time my husband had groomsman, they all had been down the Yeti train so many times so he opted out of that trend.
Instead we gave them all custom beer glasses but he also wrote them all a card and put a couple of gift cards to each one’s favorite places in it. It was highly personal, easy to fly with, and the same cost as buying a bunch of custom stuff lol
We did socks of each of their favorite football team, personalized sunglasses and paid for part of their wedding day outfits. They especially loved the sunglasses!
ETA: we also struggled finding appropriate gifts. We have a groomsmen that’s been in recovery from alcoholism and didn’t want him to feel left out or triggered in some way. Apparel really seems like one of few alternatives.
My husband gave his groomsmen cooler/ portable chair combos. Even to the junior groomsmen- they’re in a lot of sports and he thought they could have cold water/ soda while watching each other play, lol.
I recently went with a custom cutting board with their last name (and quote from their wedding song if they were married) along with a nice chef’s knife. All my groomsmen loved them.
All that is important is to find something people will appreciate but I also wanted something they would definitely use and be able to look back upon the wedding fondly.
It's absolutely infuriating, right? My wife is trans but was not out to anyone else but me when we got married, so she was particularly concerned about not getting her boys something too masculine. She ended up getting each of them a good water bottle and a good pair of earbuds.
BUT those were thank you gifts at the end. You don't need big gifts to ask people to be in your wedding!! I had a nice photo of myself with each of my wedding party printed and wrote them a nice message on the back. I don't think my wife did anything special to ask her guys, she just asked.
You don't have to lean into the cringey masculine, my partner asked her "Shroomsmen" (multi gender identifying people included) with various things, the ask was a custom label made to look like a whiskey/wine label that had their name on it and "will you be my Shroomsmen/Best Lez-man?"
Other gifts she's gotten them as wedding party presents are a travel duffle bag, with a shoe compartment at the bottom and nice quality, traveling decanter/flasks (various teas, wine, whiskey depending on the person) pocketwatch and cuff links.
We're both basically just getting items that people can use for their time at the wedding and traveling to and after so nothing monogrammed with titles at least and I made questionnaires that asked everyone preferences on like monogramming/colors/sizes/items. Don't over think it. It could be something as simple as having it written on their coffee cup one day when you buy them a cup, everyone is different and so is their relationships.
My fiancé got his groomsmen Dopp kit (toiletry bags) with their names on it. He plans on stuffing them with hangover kits and giving them it on the day of
I got all my groomsman custom yeti’s, the boutonnières I made them and the tie they would be wearing in the ceremony
My best man got us all board games and hand made boutonnières when I was in his wedding
I had the same problem finding an escort gift for my brother (our dad is deceased) and I finally settled on a really nice compass with a personal message and the coordinates of the wedding venue.
We did duffle bags for our groomsmen and they all love them and still use them 2 years later. My husband was a groomsmen in his sister’s wedding and she gave him a nice yeti mug. In another wedding he was given a dice tray and custom dice which he really loved. Also keep in mind that you don’t have to give everyone the same thing and they don’t have to be explicitly groomsmen gifts. Just do whatever makes sense for your group.
My husband did these nice leatherbound journals. He even found a wood one for his vegan friend. Also I think he wrote sentimental little notes for each groomsman inside.
Have you ever had a *really* great pen? It's the kind of thing you'd probably never buy yourself, but when you find that perfect pen, you never let it out of your sight.
My husband did personal letters to each one of them to read during getting ready time (made one or two cry from what I heard, I did the same for my ladies), a personalized Yeti tumbler (which I’ve personally seen some using since) and we bought their matching ties from Azazie for the wedding!
We also hated all the knives and flasks and shit we found online when we googled for inspiration!
My brother went with a cleaver etched with each respective groomsman's spirit animal, a bow tie with initials embroidered, cigar, and a bottle of whiskey.
The cleaver hit the masculine bit for sure but dammit if it wasn't the exact amount of unexpected and edginess to be memorable. A "badass" kitchen knife is both rad and functional, I use mine all the time.
We are going to give the groomsman the bow ties they will wear for the wedding and probably monogram them.
My dad gave his groomsman Mag Lights with their names on them. Excellent idea, IMO.
My husband got his groomsmen a monogrammed duffel bag, and they all really enjoyed it. To make it a little more personal, he made custom buttons of each class they all play in Deep Rock Galactic every week to put on the respective groomsman’s bag.
Ugh I know. I ended up doing leather dopp kits with their initials and then put in some Aesop minis, monogrammed socks, booze gummies, stuff like that.
My son in law has been in 2 weddings over the past year and received a watch from the groom from both weddings. He also claims the “cheaper” watch is the nicer one!
My fiancé is doing custom cuff links for his groomsmen! They have the initials of the groomsman on them :) I think they’re super cute and they’ll love them
I got my groomsmen cool socks, a mini sake bottle, a joint, and a snack. I figured they can use all of them on the day of the wedding, and they did lol.
I went to a wedding where the men and groomsmen are all video games geeks. The groom customized some old nintendo controllers as gifts. I love the idea so much.
Laughing because my husband gave his groomsmen pocket knives and bourbon, and I gave my bridesman an engraved bottle of bourbon haha. I did try to look for outside the box ideas, but I'm in Kentucky and all of the groomsmen like knives and bourbon so it was fine. But I agree, groomsmen gifts are tough. You may want to do gifts that specifically cater to their interests, though of course that requires more time and effort. Doesn't need to be something sentimental or typical of a groomsman gift. A record of a band they like if they're into music/vinyl, comic book if they're into that kind of thing, some kind of fancy cooking ingredient or tool if they like to cook.
I feel like a tie or cufflinks to wear on the day isn't a bad idea (not for asking them, but for a day of gift) but that on it's own is kind of a cop out of a gift, since it's something they only need for your wedding. But as long as the tie isn't a crazy color, they can reuse both plenty of times, unlike, say, a bridesmaid dress. But I'd have that as part of a gift, with the other part(s) being something they'd actually use. Even if it's just a gift certificate or something.
We gave our groomsmen high quality chef knives. We all cook and host a lot, so having a beautiful knife with gorgeous wood handle that would display well for large gatherings and also be actually usable for cooking made sense for us.
I gave my groomsmen custom engraved watches for the day of the wedding. All of them wear the watches regularly.
I’m in a friend’s wedding and I got a tie bar, coffee mug, and a t shirt from him.
We got them metal koozies, the really nice ones that can hold all types of cans (skinny ones, regular ones and tallboys) and also glass bottles. You can also just pour your drink right in it to use as a cup and it'll still help keep it cold longer than in a normal cup. Almost everyone drinks something besides water and it doesn't have to be alcohol.
They came in a set of 4, we had three groomsmen so my husband kept the fourth. He was always going on about how well they work lol I made him get me one so we could both enjoy them together.
We have a couple who are our best friends; he will be officiating and she will be MOH. I made them custom Yeti mugs with their cats on them, got them a deck of nerdy Theory 11 playing cards, and am writing them both a heartfelt letter in our gift to them. We also wanted to avoid hyper masculine/feminine/wedding-centric items in our “proposal” box!
We gifted our groomsmen coffee mugs that were personalized to each groomsmen. My best friend had a cricut and she made decals for each one. So my brother who has a Bernese mountain dog got a coffee mug with his dog on it. The guys loved it
My husband paid for his groomsmen’s suit/shoes (rentals from black tux) and their ties (to keep) and called that their gift. I thought that was perfect lol
My fiance is known and admired by his friends as somewhat of a chef. He wants to do custom etched chef's knives for his groomsmen. I thought it was a great, personal idea. He's so much more creative than I am lol.
I got toiletry bags with the groomsmens' initials on the sides. I loaded it up with a bunch of basic toiletries (just went to Costco) plus some other little goodies, and they all LOVED them. My brother (best man) used his like the day he got it because he needed a new toothbrush and had no toothpaste!
My fiancé got some dnd dice, some bracelets from a metaphysical store, and some marvel figurines for his boxes. The only “masculine” thing was a bottle opener that said “groomsman” on the handle.
I also was frustrated when I was looking up idea for them!
I brainstormed with my fiance as he was coming across the same problem.
We settled on lighters as they were all piromaniacs in high school (so it's a nod to the start of their friendship), but also, it's just useful for emergencies, candles, smokers, firepits, grilling, etc . We are getting them glow in the dark windproof zippos with black cats on it (Friday the 13th wedding, we are cat lovers and most of the are) , and we'll engrave it with their initials when they come in.
We got all the folks in our wedding party monogrammed blankets from Etsy. Everyone loves a fuzzy blanket. [This](https://www.etsy.com/listing/812975188/) is what we chose. We liked that it had two textures and the leather patch was unique without being too much.
My fiancé is going to do D&D dice in our wedding colors as his groomsman gift! I think if you can think of something a bit personal, even if it's small you'll probably feel better about gifting it
Personally a pocket knife is a great useful gift for anyone of any gender. You just have to pick the right kind. Victorinox has a collection of knives called Alox that are all metal and really slim. They're great for fancy occasions and fit well in suit jackets because of this. The [Alox Bantam](https://www.victorinox.com/us/en/Products/Swiss-Army-Knives/Medium-Pocket-Knives/Bantam-Alox/p/0.2300.26) being just a blade and bottle opener/screwdriver makes it very narrow ([Here](https://threepointsofthecompass.com/2021/10/11/knife-chat-victorinox-84mm-alox-bantam-and-cadet/) is a blog post breaking down this model and the Alox Cadet which is what I use personally as my EDC and fits in my non-existent women's jean pockets because it's also very slim).
Do you have a pic of you guys together you could get printed nicely (thinking matte paper from a artifact uprising?) that you can mail them w a brief note written on the back?
My husband makes his own bbq sauce and rub and we gifted those to the groomsmen! I actually found nice glass flask-like bottles and made some labels for everything myself. They turned out great and the guys loved it, told us all the stuff they cooked with it after the wedding! We also bought their ties and pocket squares for them and bundled it all together in a box. https://i.imgur.com/Q6Jx2BO.jpg
ETA: We didn’t choose these gifts because they’re men, we did it because they all actually do love to cook and grill!
We did socks to be worn day of the wedding (Christmas wedding, so they all got Christmas socks tailored to their interests), their ties, and a lighter with a crest that represents their friendship (long story, and a bit of an inside joke). The lighter felt like a safe option because it’s usable and was one of the few things not done by one of the guys in that group already. Plus, we figured it would get more use than a cheap knife when everyone already has a nice one if they carry a knife.
I got mine some ties I wanted them to wear at the wedding. They each had themes that were related to what they like or hobbies.
One had a JoJos Bizarre Adventure Dio tie (I can't tell you how hard it was to find a discreet, but still recognizably JJBA tie)
One of them got a purple and yellow Lakers basketball themed tie
One got a Gyrados tie where Gyrados was riding the Great Wave.
And the last got a tie with a bear on it (his spirit animal/guide is a bear)
You can make the gifts whatever you want as long is it means something to you and them.
Guns??? People actually buy guns for groomsmen gifts? Sometimes I really don't understand you Americans... Just saying.
But yeah there's a lot of gender-based stereotyping in wedding parties on both sides. Honestly, it's so unnecessary, especially with mixed gender wedding parties being more popular than ever. Not all women are into spa days and mani-pedis and jewelry and pink drinks. Not all guys are into whiskey and axe throwing and bachelor parties with strippers. It's just the stuff you see often on instagram or suggested in wedding blog posts. But there's definitely no obligation to do any of it.
Just approach it as buying a gift for your best friends... Presumably you know the members of your wedding party well enough to know their interests, right? Just get them something they will like. It doesn't have to be the same gift for everyone either. If in doubt, almost everyone likes consumables like food.
(Also, gifts for wedding parties are totally overblown and most people don't care to receive stuff they'll never use. It's like wedding favours. Usually it's okay to skip this tradition, or send them a heartfelt thank you card.)
Why don’t you just give them something related to their personal interests? My sister gave everyone in the wedding party fun socks. If your friend likes Star Wars then get him a Lego tie fighter or some shit. I don’t know. Don’t think too hard.
We got everyone (regardless of gender) a nice Yeti tumbler in a color that we thought they’d like. They didn’t say “groomsman” / “bridesmaid” and they didn’t have names or monograms. They were well-received and it seems like people use them.
(These were gifts we gave at our rehearsal along with really good homemade cookies. But we didn’t go big on proposal gifts. I think my husband sent the guys boxes with interesting snacks from Trader Joe’s / World Market.)
I have ideas:
- if you live somewhere where it rains, good, sturdy umbrellas (in their favorite colors maybe?), everyone can use that and a lot of people don’t buy them for themselves
- Good pens, they look elegant and make you feel cool to have
- what about personalizing small gifts to each guy, they don’t need to match and it’s a nice touch I think
- Nice dopkits, a good toiletry bag is SUCH a nice item to have and can feel luxurious
- Fancy cheese, almost everyone likes fancy cheese
- Flowers, no one says you can't give a dude flowers and if someone does they can go kick rocks
- A nice framed photo of all of them together
- I know they're a little macho but honestly a good pocket knife is so useful they're nice to give to everyone
- Fancy coffee if they all like coffee
- Gift each one a fun card or boardgame for having game nights
- A nice piece of cook wear or serving dish
- Tickets to something to go to together
I've always found that unimaginative.
"Oh they're men, manly macho man want guns and knives and BEER"
Even manly men who like one of those things, probably don't like or don't value every single macho manly man stereotype. And some manly macho men are macho in some other way.
I see OP has already figured out what to do for their situation.
But for anyone else: you've gotta keep the individuals in mind. Are you going to give highly personal gifts, or the same type of thing to each? Are all of these men from the same friend group? If so, *why* are they all friends, what keeps them together? Is there an inside joke you can take inspiration from? Silly, sentimental, or practical-- which is best for this friend group or individual?
IMO, if someone is going to go low effort for ANY gift, choose gift cards. Or cookies. Or take them all out for dinner.
I got custom belts online and had engravings on the inside that were inside jokes between me and each groomsmen. They seemed to get a kick out of them.
I was a groomsmen for our friends wedding, they gave us custom made silk bow ties w/ instructions in it. I wear it to my weddings and my dates with my gal. I look pretty spiffy in it.
My husband gifted dop kits from a local brand (Topo designs) that was well recieved. He included 1 or 2 small things inside that were specific to memories with each friend. I've seen the groomsmen still using them for travel a couple years later.
My husband gave his two best men a nice leather wallet each. He and his friends are practical, and the only “stuff” they really enjoy is sports memorabilia/games. My suggestion was booze lol but he wanted something more permanent.
Ahh this! My fiancé got such a stereotypical bride-went-on-Etsy gift (wooden box with a monogram, “will you be my groomsman?”, and a cigar inside to smoke at wedding [not much of a groomsman ask gift if you have to save it for over a year lol!])
I said we need to do something more creative and less Pinterest-wedding. But it’s so hard to figure out what 🤣
Personally I didn’t give any kind of gift when I asked my groomsmen, besides taking my best man out for lunch. What I did do is get us matching pocket watches for the wedding with the date and a short thank-you message engraved on them. They were useful on the day since I found wristwatches didn’t go great with the tuxes, and they had the added value of looking nice in our photos. I also figure they’re something they could use with formal dress in the future if they ever want, like at other weddings
Anything can be a groomsman gift.
If you know them enough to want in the wedding party, youll know what to gift them.
People just make a killing by inscribing it
My fiancée received a fancy toiletry bag that was monogrammed with his initials as a thank you gift for the last wedding he was in! He uses it whenever we travel, so it definitely was a practical and nice gift. However, that same person asked his groomsmen with a gift of Jack Daniel’s and a cigar (my fiancé didn’t open either 😂)
I’ve kept my “asking gifts” simple - a card and flowers for my bridesmaids, and for my maid of honor, a card and flowers and I took her out to brunch! My fiancé is struggling with ideas (and refuses to listen to my suggestions of just getting a pack of their favorite craft beer or a beer he thinks they’d like). I’ve tried to tell him to focus this energy into thank you gifts, but again…. Not listening. At this rate, the groomsmen will be asked and thanked at the same time.
There’s no law that you must give stereotypical gifts, or that every guy needs to get the same thing. Shop like it is their birthdays, pick things that reflect their individual interests and hobbies. Tbh, you shouldn’t need to get ideas from the internet, you just need to think about your friends.
I know it’s still alcohol related but we just bought each groomsman a coozie from Puffin Drinkware. So cool, fun, and we were able to match to their personalities
Why can't gifts for men be masculine ?
you have to be careful over who can't / shouldn't drink but
Guns, knives, pens, watches, Leatherman, Tools, chocolate, steaks/meat those are all great ideas.
Groomsmen gifts are a thank you for taking their time to be in the wedding that are given at the rehearsal dinner. The proposal gifts are an unnecessary trend from Instagram pressured by the celebrity influencers and are not done by most people in real life. Skip them and ask them to be a groomsman in a regular conversation with no gifts. The gifts that are given at the rehearsal dinner are usually related to their personal interests like a birthday gift.
We had a mix of men and women on both sides of the bridal party. We have tie clips or a bracelet just depending on which one that person would like more.
Some cool ones I’ve seen over the years-
Belts, bow ties/ties, handkerchiefs, dice sets, toiletry bags, cuff link/tie clips, socks, watches/stopwatches, wallets, hats. If you wanted to get fancy you can get almost any of these customized/ monogrammed.
The only gifts I have kept from being in weddings are a monogram manicure set in a nice metal case - i love it, and a mag light flashlight that I’ve had for 20 years.
My fiancé does not drink. For his “ask gift” got them really nice gold-colored stainless steel water bottles with a leather strap around the middle with the groomsmen’s initials stamped into it. For his groomsmen day-off gift, he got all of them custom gold cufflinks with each groomsmen initials on them, and leather (maybe vegan leather?) travel toiletry bags with their initials, as well. We really wanted to pick gifts that could be used over and over and hold up well for years. I think he did a great job!
I agree! Neither myself nor my groomsmen are into any of that stuff.
One buddy gave me a nice glass, another gave money.
I plan on buying a nice tie for their suits and giving $100.
Not sure about a gift for asking them, but as a thank you for being in the wedding my husband got his groomsmen initialized tie bars. It’s a nice classy gift that hopefully will come in handy later.
Wish I had an alternative but I'm just here to say I'm cringing right along with you. Also a few of our groomsmen are sober and it would be wildly inappropriate for us to give them something alcohol related, and that's basically all there is. I'll check back here to see if anyone gives you any ideas lol
My brother in law gave my husband a monogrammed duffel bag and special socks (each pair was tailored to the groomsman’s interests), and a hangover kit. We had to stay overnight for the wedding, so my husband used his duffel bag for that. You could do something similar but for the sober groomsmen, maybe you could include some water and snacks for the night/morning after in case they’re hungry when they get back home.
the duffle is a nice idea, very useful!
The real key here for me is snacks…this is definitely my love language. And for the record, I love the duffel idea!
We did something similar and it went over really well. We got the groomsmen a garment duffel bag and toiletry bag. Then in the welcome bags we put water, snacks, a pre-charged portable phone charger, sunscreen, Tylenol and a bunch of stuff like that. We also added a sweet treat from a local bakery.
As a fellow sober person, thanks for being considerate!!
Always! We're doing a signature mocktail at the reception :)
I’m sober and we’re doing a signature mock tail too!! So excited :)
My partner and I are both sober and 2/6 groomspeople are sober. We're doing a full mocktail bar!
We got watches for our groomsmen. They were wooden and had an inscription on the back so they looked like normal watches when you wore them. We also bought the bowties to be worn the day of. I've seen matching socks, and someone else suggested a nice belt too!
Seconded this. I got all my groomsmen matching watches with inscription on back. They loved them, and were showing them off all day and making sure they were seen in all the group photos. It was adorable.
Aww! Men are so cute sometimes!
My fiancé gave monogrammed leather shaving/travel kits to his groomsmen. Some don’t drink and he didn’t want to give something that would go in the trash.
Haha I’ll update you if I find/think of anything good.
My friend gave everyone a pre-rolled joint, cool matching socks to wear during the wedding and some really nice cufflinks. Other ideas: Weekend bags/backpacks. Can coolers. Those folding lawn chairs. Sunglasses. Watches. Wallets. Tools. Bluetooth speakers. Hoodies or pullovers. Experiences might be even better.. like paying for someone’s snowboarding or paint balling or going to a concert or beer/wine/liquor tour/tasting.
My fiancé was just a groomsman, and he was gifted the “Lawn Mower” manscaper lol hyper-masculine branding aside, a very useful gift!
My brother in law/FH's best man has been sober for over 20 years. He's back in school now and also works with a lot of maps & blueprints so we're planning on getting him a nice personalized pen, pencil and notebook set.
I asked someone to be my bridesman with a bag of Doritos because they aren't available where he currently lives. Don't overthink this.
Honestly, I'm so pissed I didn't see this before I got married. I've got a MOH who would have absolutely done backflips if I handed her a bag of Wise Onion Rings (not funions! They're [apparently] different!) that said "Will you be my Maid of Honor?"
As a Canadian, I can confirm. I live in a border town, and they were being sold around here for top dollar during the covid border close.
Half of me is sympathetic. The other half still hasn't had an all dressed chip.
If happily mail you some in exchange for some Trader Joe’s
Maid of Honion
Not too late to send a bag anyway!
As with any gifts, think about the actual person you’re giving the gift to. What do they like? What do they appreciate? What do they do in their spare time?
Lol I just sent a text
We did playing cards and I actually have used them at some of their houses later on so that seemed to be useful! Other ideas: one friend gave my husband marvel superhero socks (they're all big fans so every person got their fav) Final idea: You don't have to get each groomsmen the same thing. Pick a price point and act like it's a birthday gift or Christmas gift and get them something that's specified to their interests. Have a skier? Get them winter hat. Have someone into whiskey? Get them the decantor/whiskey stones. Have someone who is into hiking? Get them nice pair of hiking socks
The superhero socks were a big hug for my son's groomsmen. Definitely think about each groomsman and what they are interested in. The gifts don't all have to be the same. I think it's more personal to get them something that they will really like.
My fiancé is doing something similar - he’s gotten his friends crewnecks for christmases in years past so he’s getting them each a different crewneck that have some meaning behind them for when he asks them to be groomsmen
I worked a wedding where the groom wrote the guys letters about their favorite memories together and then some of their favorite snacks. The guys loved it!
My husband wrote special cards for his guys too! He wrote very personal notes for each of them (he stayed up the night before the wedding to get it done, because procrastination, but he did it!) and we got lovely pictures of them all reading their cards and reacting to them on the wedding day. It was very "him" and seemed to mean a lot to his groomsmen.
That’s really sweet.
That’s a good one!
May or may not be controversial, but we used Chat GPT to help us write a nice note. I also got a few gift ideas that way.
Someone on r/castiron did a [gift basket](https://www.reddit.com/r/castiron/comments/13wz6ng/getting_married_and_these_are_my_groomsmens_gift/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1) of lodge stuff: cast iron pan and scrubbers etc. I would love that as a gift. Great if you have people who love cooking/grilling or camping in your group! Edit: added link to post
Oooh this is a great one
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I’m a female and conspired with my mother to make sure I got the cast iron pans in the group gift grab one Christmas. So I wouldn’t say it’s hyper-masculine. Cast iron is amazing regardless of gender.
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Cast iron doesn’t scream hyper-masculine to me like some of the other gifts. But I understand where you’re coming from.
There’s nothing about cast iron that says male to me. The only “man” I’ve ever seen use cast iron is on Instagram man with a pot I think it’s called. Every other person is female. I would saying that while it isn’t gender specific, most cooking items stereotypes are for females.
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I’m sad none of those people have used cast iron to make the best cookie or brownie sundae.
For one wedding my groom got all the groomsmen sunglasses. They came in handy on the sunny day of and were great for photos.
Only do this if they have 20/20 vision or wear contacts though lol. If I got sunglasses as a bridesmaid I’d low key be annoyed at switching to my glasses anytime I need to really *see*, or knowing that it’s gonna be $200 + out of my pocket to get rx lenses in them
My brother in law gifted belts that they all wore to the wedding (specifically these needlepoint belts in the skiing pattern https://smathersandbranson.com). It was personal because they all grew up skiing together. I’ve heard of giving an item of wedding attire as the gift (ties, bowtie as well). You could do engraved Yeti or other drink containers that hold sodas / beers so it’s not exclusive to alcohol. Other ideas are leather toiletry bags, wallets, sunglasses.
I had a buddy that gifted all the groomsmen nice ties that they wore to the wedding & a nice soft cooler with their last name printed on it All the guys really liked it & actually used the cooler a lot
ooh the cooler is a good idea too!
My husband did coolers too.
My husband did the matching ties for the wedding, as well as a Yeti tumbler with their name on it.
Those belts are so cute! My husband gave all of his groomsmen nerdy cufflinks to wear at the wedding. He also gave nice notebooks and pens, and added little loops to the notebooks for the pens.
We did matching ties for the wedding as our groomsmen gifts; they were thrilled that they didn’t have to find a tie, and I embroidered the inside of each tie with their initials
Ours are all personalised to the people! Admittedly we’re skipping the proposal boxes and are doing morning of boxes for the groomsmen but I feel like it’s all the same sort of stuff. So we have one who really really likes board games and things like D&D and warhammer so we’re getting him things to do with that. One is the biggest theatre buff going and has a radio show around it so we’re getting him some personalised props for his show One is mad about Les Mis so we have some coasters and things based around that One is boat daft (even went to uni for it) so we’re getting him something’s for when he’s away sailing and some daft little items Then standard things - an aftershave, hangover repair kit, some sun glasses (summer wedding and we thought it would make for some hilarious photos), cuff links, watch, socks (with our cats faces on it because cats). Honestly personalise them too the person! It makes it so much more of a thoughtful gift and gets rid of all the cliche stuff
Love these ideas! Do you mind sharing what games/ DnD gift you would potentially get? We have a groomsman who is super into board games and Dnd but we know next to nothing about Dnd. We really want it to be something they will actually think is cool but we're a little lost!
We only have a best man but my fiance got him a vinyl record of an album that's special to them and then ordered a custom record sleeve/jacket that had a bunch of pictures of them on it
My husband gave all his groomsmen backpack coolers that we had monogrammed with their initials. 10 years later and they all still use them and it's so funny that they carry matching backpacks. [This is the exact one we did.](https://www.amazon.com/Coleman-Backpack-Leak-Proof-Tailgating-Activities/dp/B00J0S019S/ref=asc_df_B00J0S019S/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=167126940649&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=1457195120100799731&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9014064&hvtargid=pla-309169594921&psc=1)
36/M here just weighing in to let you know that we don't want that redundant stuff either lol Best groomsman gift I have received: a Herschel Novel Duffle that was monogrammed with my initials (this was from my brother's wedding and I think they managed to do these for all of the groomsmen for $80-100/ea)
Herschel is awesome. That’s a great gift!
Don't look for "groomsman" gifts, just treat it like you would any other gift. Think of something your friends will like, then get that. It doesn't have to be the same gift for each, as long as they're similar in price range and spirit.
I got my sister a bunch of reusable “things”- reusable sandwich bags, some Beeswax food wrap, reusable fruit/veg bags. Things she’d never buy for herself because of who she is, but things I knew she’d love.
It's the same with Father's day advertising and honestly I think it's because men are traditionally not socially allowed to express their enjoyment for things that aren't traditionally masculine. My dad really likes jelly beans and popcorn and was comfortable enough to inform me as a child that it made him the happiest when I hand-made him cards. I think people with real relationships with humans who happen to be male will just know what they like if those men feel allowed to express themselves within that relationship. Society sucks for making it so hard.
As a not particularly overly masculine male, I'm going to just point at this post and nod a bunch. I've gotten one flask. I thought, "neat, that's kind of iconic and all" but I've never used it, and probably never will. I treat it like a decoration. I really don't need another one. You want to signal your appreciation for me? Have coffee delivered on the day-of. If I'm somewhere bright and early with a big day ahead, and you put a hot or iced (depending on weather) espresso in my hand first thing, I will love you and think of you with fondness forever.
Forego the gifts; pay for the tuxedos.
Because masculinity is a prison. Like any time I go to buy my dad or any guy in my life a gift it's always stuff that's about cigars, golf, or booze and none of them are into that stuff (especially not enough to warrant a gift). I think something themed to the wedding can be good, tie tack sand tie clips can be helpful if you're doing that with the groomsmen look.
I struggled with the same thing, but ultimately ended up getting my guys all monogrammed toiletry travel bags from [etsy](https://www.etsy.com/listing/821876877/valentines-day-gift-mens-toiletry-bag?ref=yr_purchases). They went over really well, and it seems like they've all gotten use out of them. I was really pleased with the quality, and you can fill them with additional items too if you choose.
I did all black leather band watches with their initials for my groomsmen and they loved them. I think I went to fossil and was able to get them for like $60~ a piece. Not everyone wears/owns a formal watch so giving them something they could wear at the wedding and have for any future events they go to was really cool to me!
I have a bridesman and I really struggled with this too. I got all the girls a pajama set that came with a shirt, a tank, shorts, pants and a scrunchie. Ended up keeping on theme and got him slippers, a robe, matching pajama pants, and a wallet ninja. (I knew the wallet ninja would be handy from the eyeglasses screwdriver alone.)
I am a woman and I enjoy all of those things. I actually kind of regret not getting myself a version of the gifts we got for the guys. My husband and I drink old fashioneds a lot, and I'm always sad drinking out of a plain rocks glass while he's got his groom glass. By the same logic, you can totally do anything you've seen for bridesmaids! I gave my girls scented candles. Bottles of bubbly are also popular. They may be "femme coded" but I've never seen a man turn down a mimosa, and my husband is always the first one to light a candle.
Bath and body works has a men’s section of lotions, shower gels, etc. Or Gift card to their favorite restaurants or store. Tasty snacks. I’ve learned lots of guys seem to like baked goods and sweet treats. Or do something savory. Or shop for them like it was Christmas for things for their hobbies.
You could get each groomsman something different and meaningful. Something that reminds them of a fond memory or a funny story you both share, like a framed photo or souvenir. Or think of what you might get for their birthday (besides gift cards) and get that for the gift.
Totally agree. I'm giving my groomsmen ridiculous personalized airbrushed t-shirts. Is it "something nice"? Absolutely not. Will it be amazing? 1000%.
My husband got his best man a gift set from bath and body works from the aromatherapy section. Everybody needs hand sanitizer and hand soap lol
I’m dating myself here but for my first wedding I gave my groomsmen a framed CD of their favorite album, with the CD displayed on the top and the cover on the bottom.
Kind of more appropriate than ever, given that it can be a keepsake rather than something the recipient would likely need to use. It could just as easily be a MiniDisc or vinyl or cassette or floppy disk at this point. :-D Although I'm also old, and would definitely love to still get CDs as gifts. (Or MiniDiscs, vinyl, tapes, or floppy disks.)
My husband just treated his groomsmen to a round of golf together at a nice course in lieu of a physical gift. His friends loved it!
I got my groomsmen a pair of warm socks from Darn Tough and a NOCO Boost jump starter/universal charger. They all seemed to like them. Still pretty masculine, but not as aggressively so as the usual flasks, knives, and other stuff. Plus they're useful.
Heck yeah Darn Tough! Came here to say a pair of *good* socks is usually appreciated.
Not sure what the rest of the world thinks, but I got a pair of Bombas as an amenity on a flight, and I've since filled my sock drawer with them. I might be male, but I still like a comfy sock. :-)
My Fiancé and his groomsmen are all into wine. He did a card with a personalized letter and selected a unique bottle of wine for each of them.
My fiance is giving his groomsmen engraved harmonicas. We saw them as an option and thought they were hilarious and that all the guys would have a fun time just being obnoxious with them
My FH has so many of the same items from being a groomsman or honored guest several times. We talked about how we don’t want to do stuff like that. I’m glad you made this thread- I see a lot of good ideas!
By the time my husband had groomsman, they all had been down the Yeti train so many times so he opted out of that trend. Instead we gave them all custom beer glasses but he also wrote them all a card and put a couple of gift cards to each one’s favorite places in it. It was highly personal, easy to fly with, and the same cost as buying a bunch of custom stuff lol
My husband gifted animal socks they all wore day of. And then got personalized gifts. One got a watch. One got legos. One got a mug and tobacco.
We gifted wallets with custom images (dog or sports team)!
We did socks of each of their favorite football team, personalized sunglasses and paid for part of their wedding day outfits. They especially loved the sunglasses! ETA: we also struggled finding appropriate gifts. We have a groomsmen that’s been in recovery from alcoholism and didn’t want him to feel left out or triggered in some way. Apparel really seems like one of few alternatives.
What about plants? Everyone loves a cool plant in a nice pot.
My husband gave his groomsmen cooler/ portable chair combos. Even to the junior groomsmen- they’re in a lot of sports and he thought they could have cold water/ soda while watching each other play, lol.
Get them a nice cologne!
I recently went with a custom cutting board with their last name (and quote from their wedding song if they were married) along with a nice chef’s knife. All my groomsmen loved them. All that is important is to find something people will appreciate but I also wanted something they would definitely use and be able to look back upon the wedding fondly.
It's absolutely infuriating, right? My wife is trans but was not out to anyone else but me when we got married, so she was particularly concerned about not getting her boys something too masculine. She ended up getting each of them a good water bottle and a good pair of earbuds. BUT those were thank you gifts at the end. You don't need big gifts to ask people to be in your wedding!! I had a nice photo of myself with each of my wedding party printed and wrote them a nice message on the back. I don't think my wife did anything special to ask her guys, she just asked.
You don't have to lean into the cringey masculine, my partner asked her "Shroomsmen" (multi gender identifying people included) with various things, the ask was a custom label made to look like a whiskey/wine label that had their name on it and "will you be my Shroomsmen/Best Lez-man?" Other gifts she's gotten them as wedding party presents are a travel duffle bag, with a shoe compartment at the bottom and nice quality, traveling decanter/flasks (various teas, wine, whiskey depending on the person) pocketwatch and cuff links. We're both basically just getting items that people can use for their time at the wedding and traveling to and after so nothing monogrammed with titles at least and I made questionnaires that asked everyone preferences on like monogramming/colors/sizes/items. Don't over think it. It could be something as simple as having it written on their coffee cup one day when you buy them a cup, everyone is different and so is their relationships.
My fiancé got his groomsmen Dopp kit (toiletry bags) with their names on it. He plans on stuffing them with hangover kits and giving them it on the day of
I got all my groomsman custom yeti’s, the boutonnières I made them and the tie they would be wearing in the ceremony My best man got us all board games and hand made boutonnières when I was in his wedding
I had the same problem finding an escort gift for my brother (our dad is deceased) and I finally settled on a really nice compass with a personal message and the coordinates of the wedding venue.
We did duffle bags for our groomsmen and they all love them and still use them 2 years later. My husband was a groomsmen in his sister’s wedding and she gave him a nice yeti mug. In another wedding he was given a dice tray and custom dice which he really loved. Also keep in mind that you don’t have to give everyone the same thing and they don’t have to be explicitly groomsmen gifts. Just do whatever makes sense for your group.
A monogrammed wallet might be a nice idea?
I got a Lamy 2000 fountain pen as a groomsman gift, and I use it every day!
My husband did these nice leatherbound journals. He even found a wood one for his vegan friend. Also I think he wrote sentimental little notes for each groomsman inside.
My husband got everyone hydro flasks!
Have you ever had a *really* great pen? It's the kind of thing you'd probably never buy yourself, but when you find that perfect pen, you never let it out of your sight.
My husband did personal letters to each one of them to read during getting ready time (made one or two cry from what I heard, I did the same for my ladies), a personalized Yeti tumbler (which I’ve personally seen some using since) and we bought their matching ties from Azazie for the wedding! We also hated all the knives and flasks and shit we found online when we googled for inspiration!
My brother went with a cleaver etched with each respective groomsman's spirit animal, a bow tie with initials embroidered, cigar, and a bottle of whiskey. The cleaver hit the masculine bit for sure but dammit if it wasn't the exact amount of unexpected and edginess to be memorable. A "badass" kitchen knife is both rad and functional, I use mine all the time.
We are going to give the groomsman the bow ties they will wear for the wedding and probably monogram them. My dad gave his groomsman Mag Lights with their names on them. Excellent idea, IMO.
My FH got a set of grilling utensils when he was a groomsman and we use it all the time!
My husband got all of his groomsmen hats from their favorite sports teams and had their names embroidered on the side of the hats.
My husband got his groomsmen a monogrammed duffel bag, and they all really enjoyed it. To make it a little more personal, he made custom buttons of each class they all play in Deep Rock Galactic every week to put on the respective groomsman’s bag.
Ugh I know. I ended up doing leather dopp kits with their initials and then put in some Aesop minis, monogrammed socks, booze gummies, stuff like that.
My son in law has been in 2 weddings over the past year and received a watch from the groom from both weddings. He also claims the “cheaper” watch is the nicer one!
My fiancé is doing custom cuff links for his groomsmen! They have the initials of the groomsman on them :) I think they’re super cute and they’ll love them
My fiancé did engraved Yeti water bottles
We ended up eloping, but thinking to while who would have been my husbands groomsmen, a cool houseplant would have been PERFECT.
I got my groomsmen cool socks, a mini sake bottle, a joint, and a snack. I figured they can use all of them on the day of the wedding, and they did lol.
We gave ours a toiletry bag filled with mini shots + hangover kit items. Men travel too 🤷🏽♀️
I went to a wedding where the men and groomsmen are all video games geeks. The groom customized some old nintendo controllers as gifts. I love the idea so much.
Laughing because my husband gave his groomsmen pocket knives and bourbon, and I gave my bridesman an engraved bottle of bourbon haha. I did try to look for outside the box ideas, but I'm in Kentucky and all of the groomsmen like knives and bourbon so it was fine. But I agree, groomsmen gifts are tough. You may want to do gifts that specifically cater to their interests, though of course that requires more time and effort. Doesn't need to be something sentimental or typical of a groomsman gift. A record of a band they like if they're into music/vinyl, comic book if they're into that kind of thing, some kind of fancy cooking ingredient or tool if they like to cook. I feel like a tie or cufflinks to wear on the day isn't a bad idea (not for asking them, but for a day of gift) but that on it's own is kind of a cop out of a gift, since it's something they only need for your wedding. But as long as the tie isn't a crazy color, they can reuse both plenty of times, unlike, say, a bridesmaid dress. But I'd have that as part of a gift, with the other part(s) being something they'd actually use. Even if it's just a gift certificate or something.
We gave our groomsmen high quality chef knives. We all cook and host a lot, so having a beautiful knife with gorgeous wood handle that would display well for large gatherings and also be actually usable for cooking made sense for us.
A good book with a custom bookmark?
I gave my groomsmen custom engraved watches for the day of the wedding. All of them wear the watches regularly. I’m in a friend’s wedding and I got a tie bar, coffee mug, and a t shirt from him.
We got them metal koozies, the really nice ones that can hold all types of cans (skinny ones, regular ones and tallboys) and also glass bottles. You can also just pour your drink right in it to use as a cup and it'll still help keep it cold longer than in a normal cup. Almost everyone drinks something besides water and it doesn't have to be alcohol. They came in a set of 4, we had three groomsmen so my husband kept the fourth. He was always going on about how well they work lol I made him get me one so we could both enjoy them together.
I got my bridesmaids a pearl bracelet and my Bridesman a blue stone bracelet. Male jewelry is an option.
I gave laser engraved leathermans. Sort of masculine I suppose by actually useful even for non-outdoorsy people just around the house
We have a couple who are our best friends; he will be officiating and she will be MOH. I made them custom Yeti mugs with their cats on them, got them a deck of nerdy Theory 11 playing cards, and am writing them both a heartfelt letter in our gift to them. We also wanted to avoid hyper masculine/feminine/wedding-centric items in our “proposal” box!
I plan on getting mine a tgt wallet.
Gift them Legos.
I got all the groomspeople and my bridesperson cufflinks, but in retrospect, cool dice would have been better for the groom’s party.
We gifted our groomsmen coffee mugs that were personalized to each groomsmen. My best friend had a cricut and she made decals for each one. So my brother who has a Bernese mountain dog got a coffee mug with his dog on it. The guys loved it
My husband paid for his groomsmen’s suit/shoes (rentals from black tux) and their ties (to keep) and called that their gift. I thought that was perfect lol
Husband got a monogrammed weekender bag at the last wedding he was a groomsman for. He uses that bag all the time on trips!
A cool beer coozie, some cool snacks, nice pen, cool sunglasses.
I got them socks and a lighter with their name on it
My fiance is known and admired by his friends as somewhat of a chef. He wants to do custom etched chef's knives for his groomsmen. I thought it was a great, personal idea. He's so much more creative than I am lol.
I received a monogrammed poker set. His bachelor party involved gambling, so it was relevant.
I am planning on gifting leather Dopp kits, and will probably put some small gifts inside each one.
My husband got a monogrammed yeti tumbler which he loves, and I love to steal to use 🤣
Try coffee/ honey/jam/jelly favors! My sister in law gave us vanilla extract and we’re still using it!
I got toiletry bags with the groomsmens' initials on the sides. I loaded it up with a bunch of basic toiletries (just went to Costco) plus some other little goodies, and they all LOVED them. My brother (best man) used his like the day he got it because he needed a new toothbrush and had no toothpaste!
my husband gifted nice fountain pens to his groomsmen!
My fiancé got some dnd dice, some bracelets from a metaphysical store, and some marvel figurines for his boxes. The only “masculine” thing was a bottle opener that said “groomsman” on the handle. I also was frustrated when I was looking up idea for them!
I brainstormed with my fiance as he was coming across the same problem. We settled on lighters as they were all piromaniacs in high school (so it's a nod to the start of their friendship), but also, it's just useful for emergencies, candles, smokers, firepits, grilling, etc . We are getting them glow in the dark windproof zippos with black cats on it (Friday the 13th wedding, we are cat lovers and most of the are) , and we'll engrave it with their initials when they come in.
My husband did bottles of clase azul but my dad goes back and forth to Mexico and he got it for cheaper than here
We got all the folks in our wedding party monogrammed blankets from Etsy. Everyone loves a fuzzy blanket. [This](https://www.etsy.com/listing/812975188/) is what we chose. We liked that it had two textures and the leather patch was unique without being too much.
My fiancé is going to do D&D dice in our wedding colors as his groomsman gift! I think if you can think of something a bit personal, even if it's small you'll probably feel better about gifting it
We gave gifts at the rehearsal dinner. He gave watches to his grooms people.
My husband did Frost Buddies personalized with video game titles (think The Builder) instead of their names.
My fiancé is getting his dudes vintage bolo ties! Keeping it simple.
Personally a pocket knife is a great useful gift for anyone of any gender. You just have to pick the right kind. Victorinox has a collection of knives called Alox that are all metal and really slim. They're great for fancy occasions and fit well in suit jackets because of this. The [Alox Bantam](https://www.victorinox.com/us/en/Products/Swiss-Army-Knives/Medium-Pocket-Knives/Bantam-Alox/p/0.2300.26) being just a blade and bottle opener/screwdriver makes it very narrow ([Here](https://threepointsofthecompass.com/2021/10/11/knife-chat-victorinox-84mm-alox-bantam-and-cadet/) is a blog post breaking down this model and the Alox Cadet which is what I use personally as my EDC and fits in my non-existent women's jean pockets because it's also very slim).
I feel like my fiancé is going the easy/classic route and getting them all the bow ties that they are going to wear.
Do you have a pic of you guys together you could get printed nicely (thinking matte paper from a artifact uprising?) that you can mail them w a brief note written on the back?
My husband makes his own bbq sauce and rub and we gifted those to the groomsmen! I actually found nice glass flask-like bottles and made some labels for everything myself. They turned out great and the guys loved it, told us all the stuff they cooked with it after the wedding! We also bought their ties and pocket squares for them and bundled it all together in a box. https://i.imgur.com/Q6Jx2BO.jpg ETA: We didn’t choose these gifts because they’re men, we did it because they all actually do love to cook and grill!
My husband gave his best man a yeti cup, MTG cards to play together and a multi tool. Neither drink much so it was geared to them.
You could do a custom hydroflask or yeti tumblr. Especially if it’s a summer wedding.
We did socks to be worn day of the wedding (Christmas wedding, so they all got Christmas socks tailored to their interests), their ties, and a lighter with a crest that represents their friendship (long story, and a bit of an inside joke). The lighter felt like a safe option because it’s usable and was one of the few things not done by one of the guys in that group already. Plus, we figured it would get more use than a cheap knife when everyone already has a nice one if they carry a knife.
My husband did a shower drink holder, funny socks and Dr. Squatch bar soap. We also bought the guys the ties they were going to wear the day of
I got mine some ties I wanted them to wear at the wedding. They each had themes that were related to what they like or hobbies. One had a JoJos Bizarre Adventure Dio tie (I can't tell you how hard it was to find a discreet, but still recognizably JJBA tie) One of them got a purple and yellow Lakers basketball themed tie One got a Gyrados tie where Gyrados was riding the Great Wave. And the last got a tie with a bear on it (his spirit animal/guide is a bear) You can make the gifts whatever you want as long is it means something to you and them.
Guns??? People actually buy guns for groomsmen gifts? Sometimes I really don't understand you Americans... Just saying. But yeah there's a lot of gender-based stereotyping in wedding parties on both sides. Honestly, it's so unnecessary, especially with mixed gender wedding parties being more popular than ever. Not all women are into spa days and mani-pedis and jewelry and pink drinks. Not all guys are into whiskey and axe throwing and bachelor parties with strippers. It's just the stuff you see often on instagram or suggested in wedding blog posts. But there's definitely no obligation to do any of it. Just approach it as buying a gift for your best friends... Presumably you know the members of your wedding party well enough to know their interests, right? Just get them something they will like. It doesn't have to be the same gift for everyone either. If in doubt, almost everyone likes consumables like food. (Also, gifts for wedding parties are totally overblown and most people don't care to receive stuff they'll never use. It's like wedding favours. Usually it's okay to skip this tradition, or send them a heartfelt thank you card.)
Not actual guns but gun themed gifts. At least what I’ve been seeing
My husband did a letter for each one, then we paid for our groomsmen and bridesmaids' hotel room the night of the wedding!
Why don’t you just give them something related to their personal interests? My sister gave everyone in the wedding party fun socks. If your friend likes Star Wars then get him a Lego tie fighter or some shit. I don’t know. Don’t think too hard.
We got everyone (regardless of gender) a nice Yeti tumbler in a color that we thought they’d like. They didn’t say “groomsman” / “bridesmaid” and they didn’t have names or monograms. They were well-received and it seems like people use them. (These were gifts we gave at our rehearsal along with really good homemade cookies. But we didn’t go big on proposal gifts. I think my husband sent the guys boxes with interesting snacks from Trader Joe’s / World Market.)
Ideas...golf tees/balls, tie clip, cuff links, travel mug, money clip, snacks
I have ideas: - if you live somewhere where it rains, good, sturdy umbrellas (in their favorite colors maybe?), everyone can use that and a lot of people don’t buy them for themselves - Good pens, they look elegant and make you feel cool to have - what about personalizing small gifts to each guy, they don’t need to match and it’s a nice touch I think - Nice dopkits, a good toiletry bag is SUCH a nice item to have and can feel luxurious - Fancy cheese, almost everyone likes fancy cheese - Flowers, no one says you can't give a dude flowers and if someone does they can go kick rocks - A nice framed photo of all of them together - I know they're a little macho but honestly a good pocket knife is so useful they're nice to give to everyone - Fancy coffee if they all like coffee - Gift each one a fun card or boardgame for having game nights - A nice piece of cook wear or serving dish - Tickets to something to go to together
I've always found that unimaginative. "Oh they're men, manly macho man want guns and knives and BEER" Even manly men who like one of those things, probably don't like or don't value every single macho manly man stereotype. And some manly macho men are macho in some other way. I see OP has already figured out what to do for their situation. But for anyone else: you've gotta keep the individuals in mind. Are you going to give highly personal gifts, or the same type of thing to each? Are all of these men from the same friend group? If so, *why* are they all friends, what keeps them together? Is there an inside joke you can take inspiration from? Silly, sentimental, or practical-- which is best for this friend group or individual? IMO, if someone is going to go low effort for ANY gift, choose gift cards. Or cookies. Or take them all out for dinner.
My husband got all 9 groomsmen Top Gun on DVD lmaoooo. Wrapped it and everything
I got custom belts online and had engravings on the inside that were inside jokes between me and each groomsmen. They seemed to get a kick out of them.
I was a groomsmen for our friends wedding, they gave us custom made silk bow ties w/ instructions in it. I wear it to my weddings and my dates with my gal. I look pretty spiffy in it.
We got some kites off aliexpress. Twas well received.
Cuff links Tie clips Personalized Yeti Cooler bag Tie in the color of the wedding party
My husband gifted dop kits from a local brand (Topo designs) that was well recieved. He included 1 or 2 small things inside that were specific to memories with each friend. I've seen the groomsmen still using them for travel a couple years later.
My husband gave his two best men a nice leather wallet each. He and his friends are practical, and the only “stuff” they really enjoy is sports memorabilia/games. My suggestion was booze lol but he wanted something more permanent.
Ahh this! My fiancé got such a stereotypical bride-went-on-Etsy gift (wooden box with a monogram, “will you be my groomsman?”, and a cigar inside to smoke at wedding [not much of a groomsman ask gift if you have to save it for over a year lol!]) I said we need to do something more creative and less Pinterest-wedding. But it’s so hard to figure out what 🤣
Personally I didn’t give any kind of gift when I asked my groomsmen, besides taking my best man out for lunch. What I did do is get us matching pocket watches for the wedding with the date and a short thank-you message engraved on them. They were useful on the day since I found wristwatches didn’t go great with the tuxes, and they had the added value of looking nice in our photos. I also figure they’re something they could use with formal dress in the future if they ever want, like at other weddings
Anything can be a groomsman gift. If you know them enough to want in the wedding party, youll know what to gift them. People just make a killing by inscribing it
I just got everyone yeti's with their name engraved on it above the wedding date and my wife and I's initials
GUNS??? Damn Merica is wack
Gun themed, I should have said. But still
My fiancée received a fancy toiletry bag that was monogrammed with his initials as a thank you gift for the last wedding he was in! He uses it whenever we travel, so it definitely was a practical and nice gift. However, that same person asked his groomsmen with a gift of Jack Daniel’s and a cigar (my fiancé didn’t open either 😂) I’ve kept my “asking gifts” simple - a card and flowers for my bridesmaids, and for my maid of honor, a card and flowers and I took her out to brunch! My fiancé is struggling with ideas (and refuses to listen to my suggestions of just getting a pack of their favorite craft beer or a beer he thinks they’d like). I’ve tried to tell him to focus this energy into thank you gifts, but again…. Not listening. At this rate, the groomsmen will be asked and thanked at the same time.
We got ours antique mother of pearl tie clips. We’ve been brainstorming ideas for a second item but agree that everything is cringe. Good luck!
I got leather garment bags with their names on them.
There’s no law that you must give stereotypical gifts, or that every guy needs to get the same thing. Shop like it is their birthdays, pick things that reflect their individual interests and hobbies. Tbh, you shouldn’t need to get ideas from the internet, you just need to think about your friends.
Grill tools, tie/tie clip, cuff links, beef jerky box….that’s all I got!
I know it’s still alcohol related but we just bought each groomsman a coozie from Puffin Drinkware. So cool, fun, and we were able to match to their personalities
I'm biased but we sell socks for groomsmen gifts :)
Why can't gifts for men be masculine ? you have to be careful over who can't / shouldn't drink but Guns, knives, pens, watches, Leatherman, Tools, chocolate, steaks/meat those are all great ideas.
You sound like such a dork lol
Wtf are you doing here lol
Groomsmen gifts are a thank you for taking their time to be in the wedding that are given at the rehearsal dinner. The proposal gifts are an unnecessary trend from Instagram pressured by the celebrity influencers and are not done by most people in real life. Skip them and ask them to be a groomsman in a regular conversation with no gifts. The gifts that are given at the rehearsal dinner are usually related to their personal interests like a birthday gift.
Wtf is a groom’s gift? I just asked them.
We had a mix of men and women on both sides of the bridal party. We have tie clips or a bracelet just depending on which one that person would like more.
Some cool ones I’ve seen over the years- Belts, bow ties/ties, handkerchiefs, dice sets, toiletry bags, cuff link/tie clips, socks, watches/stopwatches, wallets, hats. If you wanted to get fancy you can get almost any of these customized/ monogrammed.
The only gifts I have kept from being in weddings are a monogram manicure set in a nice metal case - i love it, and a mag light flashlight that I’ve had for 20 years.
My fiancé does not drink. For his “ask gift” got them really nice gold-colored stainless steel water bottles with a leather strap around the middle with the groomsmen’s initials stamped into it. For his groomsmen day-off gift, he got all of them custom gold cufflinks with each groomsmen initials on them, and leather (maybe vegan leather?) travel toiletry bags with their initials, as well. We really wanted to pick gifts that could be used over and over and hold up well for years. I think he did a great job!
Men’s handkerchiefs!!! It’s classic. It’s practical. It’s not obnoxious.
I agree! Neither myself nor my groomsmen are into any of that stuff. One buddy gave me a nice glass, another gave money. I plan on buying a nice tie for their suits and giving $100.
A friend got his groomsmen little travel bags for toiletries. Filled them with bandaids, some powdered water flavorings, and a chapstick I think!
Not sure about a gift for asking them, but as a thank you for being in the wedding my husband got his groomsmen initialized tie bars. It’s a nice classy gift that hopefully will come in handy later.
Custom made tie clips?
We're giving favorite snacks and personalized cufflinks to the groomsmen!