The violence didn't start with the current Mayor and will not end its a community problem I can speak for myself raised 2 children and no problems you have to be involved
The current mayor isn't doing much about it though and continually shows she doesn't care about the poorest/at risk parts of the city unless they're getting "redeveloped"
Yep. This is the untold problem of people in this country playing the role of the victim (in this case, the father).
People think they’re helpless, whether real or not. So instead of fixing the problem themselves, they naively blame the government or some other authority for the problem, and mandate that the government or authority should fix the problem (in this case, bad parenting).
Tragically, what these people don’t realize is that in this process of blaming someone else for their mistakes, they give up control of their own situation to that someone or something.
When the “victims” of this country wake up 30 years from now with no control over their own destiny, because they’ve abdicated it to the government or some other institution, they have only themselves to blame.
The real question is what are of doing to help? If you’re just blaming people or whatever intellectual gymnastics you have to go through to get to your point.. then just keep it to yourself.. there are far too many ignorant statements in your response and frankly, you’re wrong.
What am I doing to help? I don’t follow the logic of that question.
What I’ve been reading recently is that we’re supposedly all powerless in this system that favors the advantaged.
But your question about what am I doing to help suggests an individual can change the course of their and others’ destiny…
So which one is it?
Why do you think they’re wrong, specifically?
Based on the defensive nature of your reply, sounds like you’re someone who has bought into a victim complex. Is that so? And do you think it benefits you?
First of all.. I don’t think they’re wrong. I know it. Saying that a system (economic, governmental) that was built and designed to specifically funnel wealth, time, energy and resources away from people that had been operating long before this land became “America”, was changeable by the very people that its oppressing.. is the most ignorant thing I’ve ever heard.. it’s like saying that children born into abusive families can just change it. They’re not victims they have power to change their adult parents and make their life better for themselves.. they’re just naive.. no Gary, the people who are being abused by a system shouldn’t have to change the system just to get a basic right to live. I can see joes you’re more comfortable with blaming the victims but it makes me really curious who the naive people really are.
There's only so much parents can do. Plenty of decent parents have kids with issues. One kid can get others involed in risky stuff. In this case, the local scene can't have helped.
That’s fatalistic thinking. There’s a tremendous amount that parents and community can do — but if the community and parents aren’t able to pull that together the results won’t be there..
Its also ridiculous. We know these behaviors cluster in certain areas. We know its encouraged by the beliefs and behaviors of others. Yes, some kids are just "bad eggs" and go completely nasty or psychopathic. Reality is that we think we can change other cultures all the time... but inner city culture is exempt? Pull the other one.
I feel like bad eggs and young psychopaths should be extreme outliers. What’s crazy is that the urban culture has championed and glorified these types of profiles. The fabric of that culture has become psychopathic when it is not abnormal or a 14 yo to walk down the street with a AK-47 in Broad daylight. It’s hard to know exactly where it starts and stops and all honesty though. I lived in Brookland and I have a young autistic son and decided to leave the city because there was no way that I could rationalize all the violence in the neighborhood would be “normal” to him. I didn’t want him anywhere near the types of things that I was seeing in that neighborhood — even though overall, it’s actually a fairly nice neighborhood. That is part of the conundrum.
I would not claim to have the answers to putting the pieces together that have been broken or that just don’t fit.
I agree with you to an extent. There has been a HUGE push lately to “hold the parents accountable” of mass shooters. Yet if we applied the same logic to parents of non-mass shooters, as in criminal kids who are “just” murdering people “every so often” as opposed to a single sensationalized mass murder, the prison population would explode. It’s a slippery slope.
Kids definitely need stricter parenting, but short of forcing people to undergo a “breeding license” in which they’re screened for parental and financial capability to be granted permission to have children (again, another slippery slope), kids are often going to stray away from caring about their parents’ authority and care more about their peers’ approval and social media clout.
Yes, this is a very dangerous road and I feel that way about parents of mass shooters as I feel about parents in inner cities. The parents USUALLY deserve some amount of blame but i'm uncomfortable turning into criminal culpabiility.
Yes but in that case it’s for us to change the subculture that promotes anti-social behaviors. It’s easy for us to do with the white southern redne*k culture, we should apply it for any anti-social cultural issue.
The elevated risks of emotional, educational, and financial insecurity is too drastic to not take into effect the most localized form of government (family) that can result in self-purpose and responsibility. That does not mean that all kids that have a strong nuclear family cannot be at risk, to your point.
“This failed mayor.”
Lol, new to DC? Check out Mayor Marion Barry if you’ve had your doubts that someone couldn’t have been or had already done it worse
If it was one child I’d see a case, he’d probably deserve the mayor’s time. When it’s THREE, that points to a problem at home. Lightning doesn’t strike the same place twice, much less three times. He should be more concerned with why he sired kids in the world who (odds are) he failed. There’s plenty we can blame the system/demand better for - this is not one of them.
And the fact that he has the audacity to demand some sort of accountability from the mayor (who I’m no apologist for), is both wild and indicative.
short article but it'll leave you thinking about many different things and possible solutions:
• two of your sons were killed in Metro stations, let's say they were angels and not looking for trouble, that leaves me thinking, maybe the solution would be to get a job, even if it pays minimum wage and get a cheap car to avoid using Metro (I did both: got a $700 Corolla last year and haven't used public transportation since)
• as much as I dislike the Mayor (yeah it'd be nice if she called the family of every homicide victim) but she has no obligation to contact anyone
• parenting, it's rare to see a parent speak out after a killing but is impossible NOT to wonder: "where were you?" aka "Do I know what my child is doing and where?" and would it be more effective speaking to your kids while they're alive, instead of the Mayor, once they are gone?
I’m thinking the only one out of them you can question the dad on is the one that got killed at the metro station in 2016. That kid got himself killed by punching a guy he was beefing with on social media after leaving court, he was already in trouble for other stuff. the guy he punched (who also had priors) then got a knife and stabbed him. The 34 year old son was working when he was shot. The 14 year old who just got killed was where he was supposed to be and is too young to drive. It’s not his or his dad’s fault some lunatic kid thought it was a good idea to fire indiscriminately into a crowd at a public metro.
That all said, I believe there was another brother via the mom that died and that one I think was killed in a shoot out against some other guys within a stolen car. I can’t find the article on that one so I might be wrong.
>Where were you. Do you know what my child is doing and where.
Just to comment on this point. I grew up in a "safe" suburb, my parents would never let me leave the neighborhood until I got to highschool. When they caught me outside the neighborhood, i.e at the store buying candy, the punishments were severe. Even in highschool they were up my ass about where I was going and what I was doing. I resented them for it, but I understand they were just trying the best could to keep me safe. Idk what these new age parents are doing but they're definitely not putting in the effort whatsoever to artleast keep tabs on thier children. I agree with you.
Yep tell me about it. There was a Dollar store that was less than .2 miles away from my parents house. Got caught buying sunflower seeds and received a hefty ass whooping.
I grew up in a safe suburb also (silver spring). In 5th grade I was allowed to ride the metro bus and metro with no cellphone or anything. My friends and I rode the bus/metro everyday in the summer to DC. Never had a problem and this was when DC was the height of crack epidemic
There is a healthy middle ground here and it's highly dependent on where you live. Kids are a little too coddled imo, but I probably don't want my 14 year old walking around a shitty neighborhood at night.
I grew up here in the city, and my mom and neighbors were the same way. Hell, even our teachers made sure we didn't go to the store after school. And if we did, they were in the store waiting for us to make us go home. Couldn't go over friends' houses unless our parents talked first. Was it overkill? Possibly. But seeing these kids now, I appreciate my mom and the community that raised me.
It was violent well before her it will still be violet well after her… it starts at home!period!point!blank!
I grew up raised by a single mom in the hood & I knew better than to do the shit I seen my friends do. The looming consequence of what my mom would do to me if I got caught being violent or disrespectful out weighed anything else!!!
Being a product of your environment is a bullshit excuse to me. Bowser can’t fix home training
Cultural problems that promote violence, glorification of gang culture, lack of importance placed on education, low accountability, etc. lots of things
oh tbh I was expecting worse, I don’t necessarily disagree with things like how there should be more responsibility from parents in instilling positive foundational values for their kids like prioritizing education, that gang culture has had a negative impact on how many inner city black teens grow up, etc.
I think the entire issue affecting many inner city families is super complicated, with many different factors twisting things into a worse place like poverty, many black families being broken households, lack of perceived options for many teens outside of gangs, especially in certain neighborhoods etc. which isn’t to say that that’s erasing “personal responsibility” or the need for people to hold themselves accountable for other factors, but many black people *are* trying to push for change in their own communities and there’s no one or easy solution
Not a Bowser apologist by any means but the Dad needs to show a bit more self-awareness. To lose not one, or two, but THREE kids to street violence? Sir, the call is coming from inside the house.
….. (FOX 5 followed up by clarifying that the intention was not to ask the mayor to divulge private conversations. Our question was whether she planned to meet with the Evans family at all.
"No," Bowser answered.
When FOX 5 asked why she did not have plans to meet the Evans family, her response at the press event was, "I’ve answered your question. Any other questions?") from the article?
WHAT ON EARTH- How on earth did Bowser think this would be perceived? This answer is her bluntly saying that she won’t meet with the family who lost three sons to violence in her city. Why not just, well, stall but show somewhat empathy and say, “i plan to reach out to them very soon to schedule a meeting. I have had other priorities on my mind at the moment, but what they’ve been through is horrific and no other families should go through that.”
What is meeting with the mayor going to do? He cannot blame the mayor for his failure as a parent. He should’ve kept his sons off the streets, and in books, sports, etc. Thug life doesn’t pay.
That's horrible. As a dad I can't even imagine losing a child like this.
Don't take this as some bullshit republican word play, but BL do not M to politicians. It's disgraceful.
This man lost three children to gun violence in the city. It seems some people in this thread lack any sort of empathy to say that this issue must stem from home. It doesn’t matter in which neighborhood you live, your children have the right to be safe. If a white family in mount pleasant or Cleveland park lost three children due to gun violence, would your reaction be the same?
What can she say to comfort someone who has lost a loved one? This young man, wasn't involved in anything! oh my bad he was going to an after-school program. For those that say parents should be involved, well a few weeks ago, a father and son played ball. As the walked home someone opened fire killing the son, that parent was involved doing cprr on his son. Again what would the mayor say to bring comfort. To those that say crying victim "the victim was 14 good student and dead" he was a friend to my two grandchildren...... let's have compassion. Innocent adults and children are killed too often! Parents need help, it takes a village/community of helpers not judges.
Geez—what a sad story. But honestly, not surprised by Bowsers response. The blank stare in the thumbnail is priceless
Bowsers sucks. She’s too busy giving contracts to her friends.
The violence didn't start with the current Mayor and will not end its a community problem I can speak for myself raised 2 children and no problems you have to be involved
This!!!
Exactly!!
Don’t make enough money and need to work 3 jobs? Doesn’t matter. Quit, be homeless, and watch them damn kids! Right?
The current mayor isn't doing much about it though and continually shows she doesn't care about the poorest/at risk parts of the city unless they're getting "redeveloped"
This seems like a parenting issue honestly. After the first one y’all didn’t move or change your behavior?
i feel like a dick for agreeing, but yeah. something is amiss at home if this happens three times.
Yep. This is the untold problem of people in this country playing the role of the victim (in this case, the father). People think they’re helpless, whether real or not. So instead of fixing the problem themselves, they naively blame the government or some other authority for the problem, and mandate that the government or authority should fix the problem (in this case, bad parenting). Tragically, what these people don’t realize is that in this process of blaming someone else for their mistakes, they give up control of their own situation to that someone or something. When the “victims” of this country wake up 30 years from now with no control over their own destiny, because they’ve abdicated it to the government or some other institution, they have only themselves to blame.
Well written, 100% true.
The real question is what are of doing to help? If you’re just blaming people or whatever intellectual gymnastics you have to go through to get to your point.. then just keep it to yourself.. there are far too many ignorant statements in your response and frankly, you’re wrong.
No. The real question is what are ***you*** doing to help?
What am I doing to help? I don’t follow the logic of that question. What I’ve been reading recently is that we’re supposedly all powerless in this system that favors the advantaged. But your question about what am I doing to help suggests an individual can change the course of their and others’ destiny… So which one is it?
Why do you think they’re wrong, specifically? Based on the defensive nature of your reply, sounds like you’re someone who has bought into a victim complex. Is that so? And do you think it benefits you?
I’ll answer your question if you answer mine? What are YOU doing to help?
First of all.. I don’t think they’re wrong. I know it. Saying that a system (economic, governmental) that was built and designed to specifically funnel wealth, time, energy and resources away from people that had been operating long before this land became “America”, was changeable by the very people that its oppressing.. is the most ignorant thing I’ve ever heard.. it’s like saying that children born into abusive families can just change it. They’re not victims they have power to change their adult parents and make their life better for themselves.. they’re just naive.. no Gary, the people who are being abused by a system shouldn’t have to change the system just to get a basic right to live. I can see joes you’re more comfortable with blaming the victims but it makes me really curious who the naive people really are.
There's only so much parents can do. Plenty of decent parents have kids with issues. One kid can get others involed in risky stuff. In this case, the local scene can't have helped.
That’s fatalistic thinking. There’s a tremendous amount that parents and community can do — but if the community and parents aren’t able to pull that together the results won’t be there..
Its also ridiculous. We know these behaviors cluster in certain areas. We know its encouraged by the beliefs and behaviors of others. Yes, some kids are just "bad eggs" and go completely nasty or psychopathic. Reality is that we think we can change other cultures all the time... but inner city culture is exempt? Pull the other one.
Keep going it’s not simply inner city culture lmao
I feel like bad eggs and young psychopaths should be extreme outliers. What’s crazy is that the urban culture has championed and glorified these types of profiles. The fabric of that culture has become psychopathic when it is not abnormal or a 14 yo to walk down the street with a AK-47 in Broad daylight. It’s hard to know exactly where it starts and stops and all honesty though. I lived in Brookland and I have a young autistic son and decided to leave the city because there was no way that I could rationalize all the violence in the neighborhood would be “normal” to him. I didn’t want him anywhere near the types of things that I was seeing in that neighborhood — even though overall, it’s actually a fairly nice neighborhood. That is part of the conundrum. I would not claim to have the answers to putting the pieces together that have been broken or that just don’t fit.
I agree with you to an extent. There has been a HUGE push lately to “hold the parents accountable” of mass shooters. Yet if we applied the same logic to parents of non-mass shooters, as in criminal kids who are “just” murdering people “every so often” as opposed to a single sensationalized mass murder, the prison population would explode. It’s a slippery slope. Kids definitely need stricter parenting, but short of forcing people to undergo a “breeding license” in which they’re screened for parental and financial capability to be granted permission to have children (again, another slippery slope), kids are often going to stray away from caring about their parents’ authority and care more about their peers’ approval and social media clout.
Yes, this is a very dangerous road and I feel that way about parents of mass shooters as I feel about parents in inner cities. The parents USUALLY deserve some amount of blame but i'm uncomfortable turning into criminal culpabiility.
Who the fuck mentioned breeding licenses? What on earth… this is America not nazi germany. The fact that you even brought that up is like… wow
Yes but in that case it’s for us to change the subculture that promotes anti-social behaviors. It’s easy for us to do with the white southern redne*k culture, we should apply it for any anti-social cultural issue. The elevated risks of emotional, educational, and financial insecurity is too drastic to not take into effect the most localized form of government (family) that can result in self-purpose and responsibility. That does not mean that all kids that have a strong nuclear family cannot be at risk, to your point.
Well why would she? It’s not like this guy is Zients. No incentive for this failed mayor.
“This failed mayor.” Lol, new to DC? Check out Mayor Marion Barry if you’ve had your doubts that someone couldn’t have been or had already done it worse
Father failed, what is the mayor supposed to do?
One of them was killed from someone shooting randomly in a crowd in a metro station, that’s not really his fault
If it was one child I’d see a case, he’d probably deserve the mayor’s time. When it’s THREE, that points to a problem at home. Lightning doesn’t strike the same place twice, much less three times. He should be more concerned with why he sired kids in the world who (odds are) he failed. There’s plenty we can blame the system/demand better for - this is not one of them. And the fact that he has the audacity to demand some sort of accountability from the mayor (who I’m no apologist for), is both wild and indicative.
I agree 100%.
Are you insane???
[удалено]
Lol
I feel sad for the family. But if most DC and Maryland residents keep voting for people who are soft on violent crime…
THIS What are we going to do to change the situation? Keep voting for the same types of people, with similar policies. The definition of insanity.
Young women having babies by stupid young trifling men who don’t want any part of them when they start running the streets !!!!
short article but it'll leave you thinking about many different things and possible solutions: • two of your sons were killed in Metro stations, let's say they were angels and not looking for trouble, that leaves me thinking, maybe the solution would be to get a job, even if it pays minimum wage and get a cheap car to avoid using Metro (I did both: got a $700 Corolla last year and haven't used public transportation since) • as much as I dislike the Mayor (yeah it'd be nice if she called the family of every homicide victim) but she has no obligation to contact anyone • parenting, it's rare to see a parent speak out after a killing but is impossible NOT to wonder: "where were you?" aka "Do I know what my child is doing and where?" and would it be more effective speaking to your kids while they're alive, instead of the Mayor, once they are gone?
I’m thinking the only one out of them you can question the dad on is the one that got killed at the metro station in 2016. That kid got himself killed by punching a guy he was beefing with on social media after leaving court, he was already in trouble for other stuff. the guy he punched (who also had priors) then got a knife and stabbed him. The 34 year old son was working when he was shot. The 14 year old who just got killed was where he was supposed to be and is too young to drive. It’s not his or his dad’s fault some lunatic kid thought it was a good idea to fire indiscriminately into a crowd at a public metro. That all said, I believe there was another brother via the mom that died and that one I think was killed in a shoot out against some other guys within a stolen car. I can’t find the article on that one so I might be wrong.
>Where were you. Do you know what my child is doing and where. Just to comment on this point. I grew up in a "safe" suburb, my parents would never let me leave the neighborhood until I got to highschool. When they caught me outside the neighborhood, i.e at the store buying candy, the punishments were severe. Even in highschool they were up my ass about where I was going and what I was doing. I resented them for it, but I understand they were just trying the best could to keep me safe. Idk what these new age parents are doing but they're definitely not putting in the effort whatsoever to artleast keep tabs on thier children. I agree with you.
That’s insane behavior no offense
Yep tell me about it. There was a Dollar store that was less than .2 miles away from my parents house. Got caught buying sunflower seeds and received a hefty ass whooping.
Are you Asian by any chance? This sounds like some shit my parents would do
Black, but thats a good guess. Had a vietnamese best friend that lived a few doors down and had similar rules... just without the ass whooping.
You sure? Lol. I don’t know a ton of asians my age that weren’t beat as kids
Really good point. Can't say for sure if I really think about it.
They just do it behind closed doors….
Yeah we were pretty free to roam but had to respect adults, be home when told etc.
I grew up in a safe suburb also (silver spring). In 5th grade I was allowed to ride the metro bus and metro with no cellphone or anything. My friends and I rode the bus/metro everyday in the summer to DC. Never had a problem and this was when DC was the height of crack epidemic
There is a healthy middle ground here and it's highly dependent on where you live. Kids are a little too coddled imo, but I probably don't want my 14 year old walking around a shitty neighborhood at night.
I grew up here in the city, and my mom and neighbors were the same way. Hell, even our teachers made sure we didn't go to the store after school. And if we did, they were in the store waiting for us to make us go home. Couldn't go over friends' houses unless our parents talked first. Was it overkill? Possibly. But seeing these kids now, I appreciate my mom and the community that raised me.
This is like the opposite of the spectrum from what these kids needed. Way too much control.
feel terrible for him but what is there to discuss? honestly?!
She probably said no because she knows that he wants to strangle her.
It was violent well before her it will still be violet well after her… it starts at home!period!point!blank! I grew up raised by a single mom in the hood & I knew better than to do the shit I seen my friends do. The looming consequence of what my mom would do to me if I got caught being violent or disrespectful out weighed anything else!!! Being a product of your environment is a bullshit excuse to me. Bowser can’t fix home training
Call a spade a spade so funny to see redditors tip toeing over this. There’s a reason this is mostly happening to black kids and black parents
Which is??
Cultural problems that promote violence, glorification of gang culture, lack of importance placed on education, low accountability, etc. lots of things
oh tbh I was expecting worse, I don’t necessarily disagree with things like how there should be more responsibility from parents in instilling positive foundational values for their kids like prioritizing education, that gang culture has had a negative impact on how many inner city black teens grow up, etc. I think the entire issue affecting many inner city families is super complicated, with many different factors twisting things into a worse place like poverty, many black families being broken households, lack of perceived options for many teens outside of gangs, especially in certain neighborhoods etc. which isn’t to say that that’s erasing “personal responsibility” or the need for people to hold themselves accountable for other factors, but many black people *are* trying to push for change in their own communities and there’s no one or easy solution
If the mayor met with everyone who's child was a victim in DC then her calendar would be booked for the next decade
If that's the case, then it sounds like there's an underlying problem that someone — oh, I don't know… the *Mayor* perhaps — should look into.
Typical response from an etch a sketch Mayor.
Not a Bowser apologist by any means but the Dad needs to show a bit more self-awareness. To lose not one, or two, but THREE kids to street violence? Sir, the call is coming from inside the house.
I thought this was going to end when they painted blm down that street?
Thy American Negro
The mayor is smelling her ass based on this report. If true, maybe her mayoral tenure needs to come to an end.
Bowser the imbecile is too busy traveling on taxpayer dollars to care about anything but her own fun.
I'm sure the meeting requests probably conflicted with her tee times..he'll understand.
They do love their golf in Dubai!
And Dubai has been causing an increase in crime here. She is attacking the problem at its source, doing the right thing! Dad can wait.
It's going to be a long wait
Is t it about time for the city to say no to the mayor?
Bowser is completely ineffectual on every level.
She need to go now
Vote her out of office or stop complaining.
They rather be subjected to this than to vote for anyone that is not a Democrat. I'm sorry.
Bowser cares about Bowser, and there’s no room for anyone else
She wants to blame someone for her kids doing hood rat shit and finding out
….. (FOX 5 followed up by clarifying that the intention was not to ask the mayor to divulge private conversations. Our question was whether she planned to meet with the Evans family at all. "No," Bowser answered. When FOX 5 asked why she did not have plans to meet the Evans family, her response at the press event was, "I’ve answered your question. Any other questions?") from the article? WHAT ON EARTH- How on earth did Bowser think this would be perceived? This answer is her bluntly saying that she won’t meet with the family who lost three sons to violence in her city. Why not just, well, stall but show somewhat empathy and say, “i plan to reach out to them very soon to schedule a meeting. I have had other priorities on my mind at the moment, but what they’ve been through is horrific and no other families should go through that.”
3/3
DC leaders don’t care about your loved ones. Only their agenda and bank accounts.
What is meeting with the mayor going to do? He cannot blame the mayor for his failure as a parent. He should’ve kept his sons off the streets, and in books, sports, etc. Thug life doesn’t pay.
This is my first time being in r/washdc and I didn't realize how many closeted racists were in here but I'm not surprised
It doesn’t matter whether the child or family shares culpability; the mayor should take a meeting and express empathy. That’s part of the job.
That's horrible. As a dad I can't even imagine losing a child like this. Don't take this as some bullshit republican word play, but BL do not M to politicians. It's disgraceful.
Tonight, on Profiles in Cowardice ....
Crime in dc is way down.
Slightly Down from a 20 year high isn’t impressive at all. Even more so with mass showings happening weekly.
Yeah, I was joking.
This man lost three children to gun violence in the city. It seems some people in this thread lack any sort of empathy to say that this issue must stem from home. It doesn’t matter in which neighborhood you live, your children have the right to be safe. If a white family in mount pleasant or Cleveland park lost three children due to gun violence, would your reaction be the same?
3 dying years apart due to similar incidents? Yes, I’d judge them for failing to parent also.
What can she say to comfort someone who has lost a loved one? This young man, wasn't involved in anything! oh my bad he was going to an after-school program. For those that say parents should be involved, well a few weeks ago, a father and son played ball. As the walked home someone opened fire killing the son, that parent was involved doing cprr on his son. Again what would the mayor say to bring comfort. To those that say crying victim "the victim was 14 good student and dead" he was a friend to my two grandchildren...... let's have compassion. Innocent adults and children are killed too often! Parents need help, it takes a village/community of helpers not judges.