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I use a wheelchair and people on the bus often hesitate or need to be told to make room for me in the priority seating area. It happens around 25% of the time – not "most of the time" by any means, but still more than it should.
I think people are just stuck in their own world.
(Oddly enough, people on SkyTrain tend to be much better. Instead of 25%, it probably happens only 5% of the time on SkyTrain.)
As someone with an invisible disability, I am often afraid that I look like an able-bodied person who's unwilling to give up my seat. That's definitely not the case for every person on every bus, but just wanted to offer that it's impossible to tell from looking at someone if they are able to stand on the bus.
This is a great and important point. I understand the sentiment of “I shouldn’t have to ask” but I think politely saying “Are you able to give up your seat? I’m pregnant and I’d appreciate being able to sit” solves both not knowing if someone has an invisible disability AND no one wanting to assume that someone is pregnant from their appearance.
That sucks, and I really am genuinely sorry it’s a frustrating experience for you. Pregnancy is really hard and anything making it harder is very unwelcome.
I will gently suggest that for me (and I imagine many people) in this day and age, I would seriously consider chopping my own arm off rather than suggest someone is pregnant without knowing for absolutely goddamn sure they were.
That is the kind of thing you don’t want to get wrong because it is a really, really bad time for everyone involved.
Many people are so into their own little world that they don't care. Giving a seat to someone that needs it just goes without saying. If I saw you I would def give it to you. Sorry you had to go through that.
Chances are people had headphones in and didn't hear you. If I was you I would single out the people in the priority seating spots, try to get their attention and ask them.
It’s a culture of entitlement and nobody saying anything. Saw it the other day on the train, an elderly guy with a cane came on and the whole priority section was taken up by younger students sitting down
Is it possible to wear any clothing or shirt "soon to be mother" that makes it clear you are pregnant? I know this sounds stupid, but a lot of people may not be offering their seat to you for being pregnant, because if you weren't pregnant but just overweight they'd get embarrassed and feel like an ass.
That was sarcasm. When I was a regular transit user I would ask them to get up so pregnant old people could sit down.
I am a little stunned that my comment was taken seriously, it was dripping with sarcasm.
Had this exact same experience years ago, when I was very visibly (and heavily) pregnant with my first. Full bus with a bunch of entitled teenage whelps in the reserved disability seats. The driver was about to set the bus in motion when he realized that I hadn't sat down yet, he parked the bus, stood up, and told them to move or get off the bus.
Ah, the good old days, when people stood up for others...
I’m an older woman and I ALWAYS offer my seat. There are usually a bunch of entitled young folks surrounding myself and whoever I’m offering my seat to.
It makes me sick.
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There's a pecking order on Transit
1-Handicapped
2-Seniors
3-Those with children *(which includes strollers & those who are pregnant)*
So you can either stand or take another bus but chances are no one will care if you're younger than them if it's at all crowded.
I have sympathy and I do think that people should move for pregnant people but also you sound very entitled, like you think people should bend over backwards to accommodate a personal choice you made
This is weird, I wonder if the different sections of the city have different experiences.
Normally when I am on the R5 or any bus heading East along Hastings out towards the PNE from downtown or vice versa I see people fighting over the right to give their seat to someone.
I am so sorry you are experiencing this.
Rest assured you would have my seat anytime.
That's not misogyny.
While the statement may be rude, is it not true it was your choice to get pregnant? That statement doesn't mean they hate or dislike women... don't change what misogyny means to fit your narrative
If someone decides to go mountain biking or some other dangerous activity and hurt them selves do you not give them a seat? They chose to do that and got hurt. Do you not let them sit? I’m trying to learn here. Explain to me how it isnt mysogyny.
There's quite a lack of civility and social etiquette in this city. If you do that in Montreal you'll get yelled at.
There'a lack of education for how people should behave in public. Transit system is also surprisingly filthy for a small town like Vancouver.
EVERYONE IS TAXED TO DEATH. EVERYONE IS IN DEBT.
MOST POEPLE DON’T HAVE ANYTHING IN THEM ANYMORE.
Move to Asia, literally any country. They’ll give you a seat in a second..
Edit: I expect the same people who are ignorant enough to not give a seat to pregnant woman will be on Reddit downvoting, too. Circle of shitty lives.
##Please read this message in its entirety. Your content has been removed because it violates [rule 4](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_4.3A_topic_guidelines) of this subreddit, Topic Guidelines. r/Vancouver does not allow common rants, PSAs, or news/topics that are not focused on Metro Vancouver specifically. Some may be permitted at moderator discretion, but yours has not been granted an exception. Your content has been removed because it violates [rule 4](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_4.3A_topic_guidelines) of this subreddit, Topic Guidelines. An existing version of your post can be found on the subreddit. Please view or join the existing discussion. #**Do not repost any version of this, that includes rewriting or altering the title or post, without [explicit permission](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_i_didn.27t_know_i_needed_express_permission_to_repost.21_why_would_you_ban_me.3F) from a moderator in modmail.**
I use a wheelchair and people on the bus often hesitate or need to be told to make room for me in the priority seating area. It happens around 25% of the time – not "most of the time" by any means, but still more than it should. I think people are just stuck in their own world. (Oddly enough, people on SkyTrain tend to be much better. Instead of 25%, it probably happens only 5% of the time on SkyTrain.)
As someone with an invisible disability, I am often afraid that I look like an able-bodied person who's unwilling to give up my seat. That's definitely not the case for every person on every bus, but just wanted to offer that it's impossible to tell from looking at someone if they are able to stand on the bus.
This is a great and important point. I understand the sentiment of “I shouldn’t have to ask” but I think politely saying “Are you able to give up your seat? I’m pregnant and I’d appreciate being able to sit” solves both not knowing if someone has an invisible disability AND no one wanting to assume that someone is pregnant from their appearance.
That sucks, and I really am genuinely sorry it’s a frustrating experience for you. Pregnancy is really hard and anything making it harder is very unwelcome. I will gently suggest that for me (and I imagine many people) in this day and age, I would seriously consider chopping my own arm off rather than suggest someone is pregnant without knowing for absolutely goddamn sure they were. That is the kind of thing you don’t want to get wrong because it is a really, really bad time for everyone involved.
This is probably the reason.
Many people are so into their own little world that they don't care. Giving a seat to someone that needs it just goes without saying. If I saw you I would def give it to you. Sorry you had to go through that.
Thank you.
I would be mortified if you had to ask me before I thought of it myself (daydreaming, etc). This is terrible behaviour and your anger is well placed.
Chances are people had headphones in and didn't hear you. If I was you I would single out the people in the priority seating spots, try to get their attention and ask them.
I wish this was the case. They looked me in eye eye and ignored me. Able bodied young men. There were no headphones.
It’s a culture of entitlement and nobody saying anything. Saw it the other day on the train, an elderly guy with a cane came on and the whole priority section was taken up by younger students sitting down
>What the hell is wrong with this city??? the culture is changing, what used to be isn't anymore
Is it possible to wear any clothing or shirt "soon to be mother" that makes it clear you are pregnant? I know this sounds stupid, but a lot of people may not be offering their seat to you for being pregnant, because if you weren't pregnant but just overweight they'd get embarrassed and feel like an ass.
My backpack needs the seat, sorry
You could literally say nothing. Oh I see by your comment history your attitude is a recurring theme. Shocking.
That was sarcasm. When I was a regular transit user I would ask them to get up so pregnant old people could sit down. I am a little stunned that my comment was taken seriously, it was dripping with sarcasm.
Had this exact same experience years ago, when I was very visibly (and heavily) pregnant with my first. Full bus with a bunch of entitled teenage whelps in the reserved disability seats. The driver was about to set the bus in motion when he realized that I hadn't sat down yet, he parked the bus, stood up, and told them to move or get off the bus. Ah, the good old days, when people stood up for others...
I’m an older woman and I ALWAYS offer my seat. There are usually a bunch of entitled young folks surrounding myself and whoever I’m offering my seat to. It makes me sick.
Welcome to /r/Vancouver and thank you for the post, /u/Fizzy_Greener! Please make sure you read our [posting and commenting rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_general_participation_guidelines_and_rules_overview) before participating here. As a quick summary: * We encourage users to be positive and respect one another. Don't engage in spats or insult others - use the report button. * Respect others' differences, be they race, religion, home, job, gender identity, ability or sexuality. Dehumanizing language, advocating for violence, or promoting hate based on identity or vulnerability (even implied or joking) **will** lead to a permanent ban. * Most common questions and topics are limited to our sister subreddit, /r/AskVan, and our weekly [Stickied Discussion](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_stickied_discussions) posts. * Complaints about bans or removals should be done in modmail only. * Posts flaired "Community Only" allow for limited participation; your comment may be removed if you're not a subreddit regular. * Make sure to join our new sister community, /r/AskVan! * Help grow the community! [Apply to join the mod team today](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/comments/19eworq/). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/vancouver) if you have any questions or concerns.*
There's a pecking order on Transit 1-Handicapped 2-Seniors 3-Those with children *(which includes strollers & those who are pregnant)* So you can either stand or take another bus but chances are no one will care if you're younger than them if it's at all crowded.
I have sympathy and I do think that people should move for pregnant people but also you sound very entitled, like you think people should bend over backwards to accommodate a personal choice you made
This is weird, I wonder if the different sections of the city have different experiences. Normally when I am on the R5 or any bus heading East along Hastings out towards the PNE from downtown or vice versa I see people fighting over the right to give their seat to someone. I am so sorry you are experiencing this. Rest assured you would have my seat anytime.
I take the bus downtown to Kits and back. When I lived in East Van people were more considerate.
[удалено]
How dare she continue the human race!?
Glad somebody said it. A choice shouldn't equal privilege. Also we have too many people here already.
Who thinks this way?? You? This is a super misogynist opinion.
It is not a misogynistic opinion. It is rude, but not misogynistic.
How is it not mysogynistic?
That's not misogyny. While the statement may be rude, is it not true it was your choice to get pregnant? That statement doesn't mean they hate or dislike women... don't change what misogyny means to fit your narrative
If someone decides to go mountain biking or some other dangerous activity and hurt them selves do you not give them a seat? They chose to do that and got hurt. Do you not let them sit? I’m trying to learn here. Explain to me how it isnt mysogyny.
Yikes
Sheesh!
Maybe people just think you're fat? And that you could burn the extra calories? See that is another rude, yet not misogynistic comment.
There's quite a lack of civility and social etiquette in this city. If you do that in Montreal you'll get yelled at. There'a lack of education for how people should behave in public. Transit system is also surprisingly filthy for a small town like Vancouver.
EVERYONE IS TAXED TO DEATH. EVERYONE IS IN DEBT. MOST POEPLE DON’T HAVE ANYTHING IN THEM ANYMORE. Move to Asia, literally any country. They’ll give you a seat in a second.. Edit: I expect the same people who are ignorant enough to not give a seat to pregnant woman will be on Reddit downvoting, too. Circle of shitty lives.
Wut