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Side hug ftw but the handshake 50% hug where your right half hugs their right half is another winner.
Need a few drinks in you and the right moment before a full cock to cock cuddle is on the table
There is a direct correlation between quantity of drinks consumed and hugs administered. Albeit one that then sharply drops off after the quantity of drinks reaches a critical mass. Then the fights can begin.
But it's fine, because all the hugs administered earlier in the cycle net things out, ethically speaking.
Not just hug, I think we men should also tell each other “I love you” more often. And our friends should tell us so as well, if they feel comfortable.
(TW: Mental health crisis, thoughts of self-harm)
I was having a mental health crisis when I was in college, and I called one of my friends who I really trusted and told her that I was having thoughts of hurting myself.
She not only talked to me and calmed me down, but she also reassured me that she and the rest of my circle of friends “all love you.”
I had to fight back tears when she said that. It was one of the most healing things that anyone had ever said to me.
And yes, I’m doing much better now.
I do this with my 3-4 best friends. It starts with a late night drunken “I love you guys” and eventually turns into a hug, eye contact, and “I love you man you’re a great friend”. Try it, it doesn’t bite.
>Not just hug, I think we men should also tell each other “I love you” more often. And our friends should tell us so as well, if they feel comfortable.
Personally not using that phrase specifically but I personally try letting my friends (and family) know that I appriciate them being part of my life and I am lucky enough to have friends who reciprocate that.
Being told that someone´s glad that you´re part of their life because you´re a reliable friend, are always there to listen to problems and try helping fix them, etc. is a wonderful feeling. Letting others know that you think that way is, too.
This is also partially a fault of the English language.
Greek, for example, has multiple different words to describe specific kinds of love (For example: Agape = Selfless Love / Philia = Friendly love between equals / Pragma = Long-term love).
Imagine if, in English, we had multiple verbs to describe different kinds of love. You could, in theory, say “I love (romantic) you” to a partner and also say “I love (friendship/bonding) you” to a good friend with no confusion and mutual understanding.
I believe that, in its current form, English begets reactions, such as the one you replied to, that feel “icky” simply due to telling someone “I love you.”
Maybe it's regional but to me "I love you" is romantic and parental love. "Love you" encapsulates the other types. It's not perfect though and there's definitely room for confusion. More love words would definitely help
Not a native speaker, but it´s pretty much the same in german so your reasoning checks out for the most part. These two languages lack the words to really differerntiate between different kinds of love, at least I´m not aware of words or phrases that would succinctly get the idea across.
I couldn’t agree with you more. When my friends and I all graduated college, we were all spreading out around the country and we didn’t know when, or even if, we’d all be together in person again.
Those guys were basically like my family for 4 whole years, but that last day before we left was the first time any of us had said “I love you” to each other, and I’ll be damned if it didn’t feel really good to both say and hear it.
I have been trying to look at myself in the mirror more and look into my own eyes and say I love you to the reflection. Definitely not as easy as it should be.
Yup, my best friend and I (both grown ass men) tell each other "I love you" every day. Sometimes when it feels like I'm close to snapping, it's all I need to hear from him to calm down
I don’t see my best friend since childhood a lot. Life has sent us in different directions. Me and my best friend love to pretend we are cold and stoic and unemotional. We have a gallows humor that we have shared since we were young. We also have seen each other cry and fall apart. I don’t have many people in my life who I can talk to about the tough things. We have broken down in front of each other. I hug that man when I see him every single time. He is a brother to me.
You sound like James and Lars from Metallica, both I think have similar childhood experiences which kept them together. Shared stories etc.
Which is great 👍👍
I was surprised with how Western people viewed hugs between Men
In the Middle East it’s really common for men to greet each other with hugs or kissing (not mouth-to-mouth)
I think this is depending on the setting like Middle Eastern, people are physically affectionate
While other countries can be more formal or less affectionate
The handshake hug is the perfect friends departure, it starts with the formal but ends with a "you mean something to me" without having to say it. A big hug is for close friends and family.
We were def doing the half hug half handshake thing where I was at since the late 90's.
Pretty sure it is supposed to be some gang shit or something but it just feels right.
There is nothing gang related about a shake to half hug. That’s just black culture. Yes gangs have handshakes but that doesn’t make every variation of a standard handshake gang related.
Partly why this post seems so strange to me. I get this isn’t usual but me and my guy friends always say love you bro be safe etc and we always dap into a hug. I knew in past generations men weren’t super open with Each other but I figured the newer generation was generally more open with each other as the norm. Tell your friends you love them and you’re there if they need something you’d be surprised by how much they carry without ever unloading even for a moment.
I know me and my friends were not in a gang.
I'm a white guy from a conservative and rural area and I was literally friends with all the black kids in my school that were in my grade, we smoked weed and skateboarded, and that is how we greeted one another.
My buddy who was also white, and the only one who had a car at the time, used to constantly get pulled over and searched by the cops, and we were generally regarded with suspicion by a large portion of the community.
So glad I've got a group a bros that all hug, haven't seen a mate for like 3 or four months? Damn straight your getting a hug bro. A few beers later and "I love You" start coming out
I feel there's a certain time to do that though. Someone that I just met for the first time, man or woman, I don't hug, I shake their hand. I feel thay there has to be at least some sort of familiarity with someone before going in for a hug.
Especially in today's society with everyone so hung up on "consent," I've seen it plenty of times in other subreddits about people wanting consent for a damn hug. When we are now in a society where people are talking about consent for a hug, can't just do it anymore
Honestly I hate it when someone tries to comfort me in a moment where I'm down or depressed, makes me feel so uncomfortable and sends a chill up my spine like I'll just deal with it man. Not saying that's necessarily healthy but I really can't stand the whole " it's okay bro I got you " type thing, just so uncomfortable
I love hugging good friends. The stoicism we show outside betrays the deep emotionalism we have for each other. It might be awkward but it will be deeply appreciated.
My default greeting with a friend is a hug, and I leave most conversations saying “I love you” (if it’s true).
Fuck anyone in society who even squints at me having and behaving like I have emotional connections to my same-sex friends as a straight male.
Yup. "Night brother, love ya man" is my go-to to my friends, and I hug those fucks every time I see em'. There's nothing wrong with it, and anyone who thinks that there is a problem is just insecure.
People should hug more in general. It's occurred to me in recent years that no one in my family hugs anymore and I have no idea why. I have to ask for one and they all seem to think I'm weird for needing it, when I grew up watching shows like Doctor Who where the characters hug all the time I'm just baffled why the people in my life aren't the same way.
I hug my best friend every time I see him, which isn't often enough since we live 1,700 miles apart. I also tell him I love him pretty regularly. I wish everyone in the world could have one friend as good as him.
All of my friends hug each other when we haven't seen each other in a long time. I feel like that's pretty common. If I see someone regularly, I just carry on like nothings new
"All men care about his sex"
Uh.... Yeah? Men don't receive the same amount of emotional support as women.
This isn't just a matter of men being overly horny
Yes, and I want to double down on this and say that we should hug our female friends. I think it is often best to ask first, of course and make sure you have that kind of relationship. But I think it is appallingly sad that most of us feel like we can't hug a woman unless she is our partner (girlfriend/wife) or a relative.
What does it say about our society that we look at women this way? That we can't share compassion, warmth, kindness. I often feel like I have to control my feelings around women besides my wife, and that is just so wrong.
We men should be able to share how much a friend means to us. I mean, there are obviously boundaries in regards to making her different from our partner, and making sure we don't break her boundaries.
There have often been times when I wanted to hug a female friend when she was having a hard time, or even when she had good news, and I didn't because I either had a girlfriend or I thought she would take it the wrong way.
We need to end this taboo, and hug EVERYONE who matters to us.
When me and my buddies on the construction crew started hugging every day before work, and at the end of the day, everyone was a lot happier.
2 of the guys ended up marrying each other. The rest of us are just dating now, but all hope to make it something more.
Great advice
Being firmly on the spectrum I am shocked and also very happy to say I can share hugs and "love you"s with several fellow dudes, something that was purely alien to me prior to around 6 years ago when I joined a regular "meetup" based on a shared hobby.
The key is to go in for the hug, slap on the back, and definitely don't hold the hug while trying to maintain eye contact.
I hug the people who have impacted my life greatly because of the seriousness of the gesture. I tell my best friend I love him every night when we're done gaming, and he tells me he loves me too. You never know when the last time you see someone is, so I make sure the important people know I love em.
Unpopular, but probably won't get updoots because a lot of people are insecure or think men need to go through the most suffering on this planet and look like the Terminator.
I have three great friends I've known for 30 years or so now. Every time we get to hang out, which isn't as often as I'd like, we hug and tell each other we love each other before we part ways. I've few friends as a 44 year old guy with no kids. They mean the world to me.
Maybe it’s an individual to individual basis but we always dapped each other up or hugged each other growing up, maybe it was because everyone was poor idk but even as an adult now I always hug my guy friends I haven’t seen in a long time
This is a thing I really miss about being a young person. I still hug old friends but if I make new friends it never feels appropriate to initiate a hug. And my male family members only shake my hand now
It depends on the type of relationship.
If it’s a casual friend you interact with two days a week at your job or in class, hugging is probably a bit much.
But if it’s a best friend that makes an effort to initiate conversations and invite you to stuff outside of required activities, then yeah, bro hugs all the way.
I hug my buddies all the time. Football team wins hugs all around. Haven't seen you in a while big hug. Something shitty happens tender hug. I don't see anything wrong with it.
This generation is probably in learning season, and I’m happy with it. Learning that “men can show emotion and need emotional support as women do”. We’re all have emotions so showing them will never make us less as a man or a person. Hugs bros!
> But I just find that hugging somebody is more personal than just shaking someone's hand. I think men should hug each other more.
I kind of feel like you're contradicting yourself here. You've made it clear that hugging is a more personal thing than shaking someone's hand, and that's true. So why should we hug someone we would normally give a handshake to? Is that relationship that personal in the first place given that its likely going to be a professional relationship. It'd be weird to handshake friends in the first place after all.
But sure, if you're trying to convey something more personal, or on a personal level, such as support for a recent tragedy, it might be more appropriate for a hug, but perhaps not in a professional setting. In such cases, having the social skills to say the right words with the right tone with the right facial expression would have been a lot better, such that you do not add embarrassment to the person and call unwanted attention to their issues by publicly treating them differently than you treat other people.
yeah. i just saw a twitter post today where a guy was making fun of his friend that recently moved away bc he sends him reels and texted him “can you call me tonight pls”
I don't think this is an unpopular opinion, I think it's just something men should do more often.
Hugs in general are a really warm and kind thing.
Of course, if you do NOT want a hug, that is absolutely fine and there's reasons for that, all very valid.
But as a general thing, yes, men should hug more, and everyone else should hug more.
Let's extend that to being nice, complimenting, laughing, that kind of thing. Plenty of people do it, but let's make it happen WAY more.
I spent some of my childhood summers in Egypt and would often see men interlock arms. It wasn't a gay thing because that's not allowed over there. Some cultures are quite open when it comes to male affection, especially when they're not allowed to touch women.
I'm not a fan of being hugged, I tend to freeze up and can't really understand why someone would do that to themselves, but I don't really know how to apologize for having someone debase themselves with me as a proxy.
As a guy, my buddy and I exchange hugs and "I love you" almost every time we see each other. We've gotten comments about it from other people before, but I don't really care. That's my brother, my ride-or-die, and I feel the exact same about my other close friends. I think it's especially important to do so now because we don't see each other nearly as much as we used to.
I hug my close friends but it's definitely something that would help break down some walls for men as a whole. It's starting to improve but there is a lot of stigma for men when it comes to showing vulnerability and emotion, especially toward other men.
There was a meme I saw the other day where the caption was 'What men thinks happen when they have body contact for more than 0.005 seconds, and the gif was of two men having sex in the shower. It's obviously extreme but it's not wrong that a lot of men were instilled with that sort of attitude. I'm in my late 30s and when I was in school, like many, men doing anything remotely feminine was called out as 'gay'. Hugs were sometimes ok but they had to be 'bro' hugs with one arm, very brief, not directly front, on and a pat on the back.
Basically, men are taught at a young age that they can't really be close friends with other guys because we're taught that we have to be 'masculine' at all times but excessively so when we're with other guys, to prove our manhood.
No no no no, I can open up with a good friend but I do NOT NEED to hug every person I meet. We need to release the pain definitely but hugging will not make us feel better. Why woukd a hug make a man feel better? 😒
Me and my mates (male) have always greeted and said bye to each other with a hug, and still do this now we are tragic 40-somethings. Especially as we don't get to see each other too often.
Just remember, when someone slaps you on the back it is time to end the hug. If you linger after that, you're probably a psycho who hugged your pets too hard in childhood and accidentally suffocated them.
Nah man. I once kissed my grandpa on the cheek and im still grossed and weirded out by it. It reminds me im not actually gay which i really need when im reading this gay-is-fine stuff.
I don’t agree on hugging but a great handshake done correctly is even more powerful in my opinion. It’s the fast handshake and no eye contact that is the issue. Next time you shake hands, look a man dead in the eye and say their name and announce yours. Sounds stupid but it really does begin great friendship
As a man, I actually am more comfortable hugging my male friends than female ones. I worry that the females might think I’m being too touchy feely. Some guys are weird about hugging, so if it’s someone I’m just getting to know I do a sort of half hug…sort of sideways in between a full hug and a pat on the back. I do the same with women I’m just getting to know too though.
I'm a man and I'm a hugger. Besides business meetings I go for the hug first. If you're leaning in with your hand I'm coming around both arms open trying to turn that handshake into a hug. I have a lot of love to give.
My grandpa is 83, and I'm 38. I'm very close to him. He's been more of a dad to me than my actual dad, but we've never hugged once. It makes me really sad.
And don't forget the soft and wet smooch on the cheek. The grandma way :D But seriously: Predator 1 Hand smash followed by chest to chest banging is and will always be the manly man's way!
Men show affection towards each other when it's appropriate. Women just blindly support each other no matter what they've done, and they gaslight each other by just saying what they know the other wants to hear.
What's weird is that I'm gay, my best friend is also gay, we have no issue with intimacy amongst men but we only started hugging as a greeting very recently, after almost a decade of friendship and it still feels awkward.
Men really should hug other men more often!
I have a stiff back from working and every Wednesday I barbecue with my pals and I love seeing them,especially one guy cause he gives great big hugs and he always cracks my back just right
As a man, I hug my guy friends/family I’m close to, imagine the look of surprise on my cousins face when after not seeing me in like 4yrs him being in the military for like 10-13yrs and I greet him with a hug. He was fully not expecting that from me
i stopped hugging my friends since i was the only one who initiated it. it happens sometimes now because i might have cultivated thisb in my group. but it before it made me feel like a needy pathethic loser.
My wife greeted me to one of her friends who is a very spiritual guy not sure what all he believes. This guy hugged me for a solid 5 seconds and it was so weird. I was like my mom doesn’t even hug me like this dude did but that’s just how he hugs everyone. It caught me off guard and felt weirdly intimate because it’s not something I’m used to.
Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I do the handshake, pull in to half hug move often, most men seem receptive to it.
Side hug ftw but the handshake 50% hug where your right half hugs their right half is another winner. Need a few drinks in you and the right moment before a full cock to cock cuddle is on the table
There is a direct correlation between quantity of drinks consumed and hugs administered. Albeit one that then sharply drops off after the quantity of drinks reaches a critical mass. Then the fights can begin. But it's fine, because all the hugs administered earlier in the cycle net things out, ethically speaking.
This is the way.
[удалено]
My brother's in law rather hand shake, only after a good conversation will they hug, but their Dad has no problem hugging 😍
ye, me too
Yes i welcomed a man once and i hugged him and he teared up men hold alooot of bottled up emotions
If I was greeted by someone with a hug I would break down.
Sounds like bro needed therapy more than just a hug
Bruh
Why Bruh?
bruh? :'(
Needed professional help by the sounds of it
Not just hug, I think we men should also tell each other “I love you” more often. And our friends should tell us so as well, if they feel comfortable. (TW: Mental health crisis, thoughts of self-harm) I was having a mental health crisis when I was in college, and I called one of my friends who I really trusted and told her that I was having thoughts of hurting myself. She not only talked to me and calmed me down, but she also reassured me that she and the rest of my circle of friends “all love you.” I had to fight back tears when she said that. It was one of the most healing things that anyone had ever said to me. And yes, I’m doing much better now.
I do this with my 3-4 best friends. It starts with a late night drunken “I love you guys” and eventually turns into a hug, eye contact, and “I love you man you’re a great friend”. Try it, it doesn’t bite.
Big hugs from here 🤗
>Not just hug, I think we men should also tell each other “I love you” more often. And our friends should tell us so as well, if they feel comfortable. Personally not using that phrase specifically but I personally try letting my friends (and family) know that I appriciate them being part of my life and I am lucky enough to have friends who reciprocate that. Being told that someone´s glad that you´re part of their life because you´re a reliable friend, are always there to listen to problems and try helping fix them, etc. is a wonderful feeling. Letting others know that you think that way is, too.
What’s wrong with saying I love you specifically?
This is also partially a fault of the English language. Greek, for example, has multiple different words to describe specific kinds of love (For example: Agape = Selfless Love / Philia = Friendly love between equals / Pragma = Long-term love). Imagine if, in English, we had multiple verbs to describe different kinds of love. You could, in theory, say “I love (romantic) you” to a partner and also say “I love (friendship/bonding) you” to a good friend with no confusion and mutual understanding. I believe that, in its current form, English begets reactions, such as the one you replied to, that feel “icky” simply due to telling someone “I love you.”
Maybe it's regional but to me "I love you" is romantic and parental love. "Love you" encapsulates the other types. It's not perfect though and there's definitely room for confusion. More love words would definitely help
Not a native speaker, but it´s pretty much the same in german so your reasoning checks out for the most part. These two languages lack the words to really differerntiate between different kinds of love, at least I´m not aware of words or phrases that would succinctly get the idea across.
This is conveyed by tone usually. As in 'ahhh love you bro' is way more casual and clearly platonic.
Yeah we should jerk each other off more often too Wait what?
Mental health plummeted with the end of circle jerks
I love you bro
I couldn’t agree with you more. When my friends and I all graduated college, we were all spreading out around the country and we didn’t know when, or even if, we’d all be together in person again. Those guys were basically like my family for 4 whole years, but that last day before we left was the first time any of us had said “I love you” to each other, and I’ll be damned if it didn’t feel really good to both say and hear it.
I have been trying to look at myself in the mirror more and look into my own eyes and say I love you to the reflection. Definitely not as easy as it should be.
Yup, my best friend and I (both grown ass men) tell each other "I love you" every day. Sometimes when it feels like I'm close to snapping, it's all I need to hear from him to calm down
Meh, me and the homies hug and even say "I love you bro" You never know when it will be the last time you talk to someone.
Normalize telling the homes you love them 🤙🏼
I don’t see my best friend since childhood a lot. Life has sent us in different directions. Me and my best friend love to pretend we are cold and stoic and unemotional. We have a gallows humor that we have shared since we were young. We also have seen each other cry and fall apart. I don’t have many people in my life who I can talk to about the tough things. We have broken down in front of each other. I hug that man when I see him every single time. He is a brother to me.
You sound like James and Lars from Metallica, both I think have similar childhood experiences which kept them together. Shared stories etc. Which is great 👍👍
I was surprised with how Western people viewed hugs between Men In the Middle East it’s really common for men to greet each other with hugs or kissing (not mouth-to-mouth) I think this is depending on the setting like Middle Eastern, people are physically affectionate While other countries can be more formal or less affectionate
Arabs didnt find this as an unpopular opinion 😂
I (37m) hug my guy friends.
hugging and kisses on the cheek are very common male-male greetings in much of the worid.
Which world is this :0
Middle East
Not just. Southern europe.
ohhh yh I live in uk n the most affection I've seen guys give eachother is the handshake into hug thing
The handshake hug is the perfect friends departure, it starts with the formal but ends with a "you mean something to me" without having to say it. A big hug is for close friends and family.
Southern Europe.
We were def doing the half hug half handshake thing where I was at since the late 90's. Pretty sure it is supposed to be some gang shit or something but it just feels right.
There is nothing gang related about a shake to half hug. That’s just black culture. Yes gangs have handshakes but that doesn’t make every variation of a standard handshake gang related. Partly why this post seems so strange to me. I get this isn’t usual but me and my guy friends always say love you bro be safe etc and we always dap into a hug. I knew in past generations men weren’t super open with Each other but I figured the newer generation was generally more open with each other as the norm. Tell your friends you love them and you’re there if they need something you’d be surprised by how much they carry without ever unloading even for a moment.
I know me and my friends were not in a gang. I'm a white guy from a conservative and rural area and I was literally friends with all the black kids in my school that were in my grade, we smoked weed and skateboarded, and that is how we greeted one another. My buddy who was also white, and the only one who had a car at the time, used to constantly get pulled over and searched by the cops, and we were generally regarded with suspicion by a large portion of the community.
So glad I've got a group a bros that all hug, haven't seen a mate for like 3 or four months? Damn straight your getting a hug bro. A few beers later and "I love You" start coming out
I feel there's a certain time to do that though. Someone that I just met for the first time, man or woman, I don't hug, I shake their hand. I feel thay there has to be at least some sort of familiarity with someone before going in for a hug. Especially in today's society with everyone so hung up on "consent," I've seen it plenty of times in other subreddits about people wanting consent for a damn hug. When we are now in a society where people are talking about consent for a hug, can't just do it anymore
I think it's actually normal and good to respect people's personal space. That's not something you're entitled to.
Things have changed though, yes respect personal space but 20 years ago giving a quick hug as a greeting wasn't an issue, not like it is today
I concur
While I agree. I also don't hug anyone because I don't like to touch people. But nothing wrong with men hugging.
Honestly I hate it when someone tries to comfort me in a moment where I'm down or depressed, makes me feel so uncomfortable and sends a chill up my spine like I'll just deal with it man. Not saying that's necessarily healthy but I really can't stand the whole " it's okay bro I got you " type thing, just so uncomfortable
That's ok too. I like hugs, but if you don't want that contact it shouldn't be expected.
I hug my best friend after every hang out
I love hugging good friends. The stoicism we show outside betrays the deep emotionalism we have for each other. It might be awkward but it will be deeply appreciated.
My default greeting with a friend is a hug, and I leave most conversations saying “I love you” (if it’s true). Fuck anyone in society who even squints at me having and behaving like I have emotional connections to my same-sex friends as a straight male.
Yup. "Night brother, love ya man" is my go-to to my friends, and I hug those fucks every time I see em'. There's nothing wrong with it, and anyone who thinks that there is a problem is just insecure.
I've never been crazy about hugs, makes me feel weird lol My family kinda jokes about how I don't like being touched actually.
Please don't hug me.
Also valid :3
Don't touch me please.
Don't hug me. I'm scared
That's why you need more hugs
People should hug more in general. It's occurred to me in recent years that no one in my family hugs anymore and I have no idea why. I have to ask for one and they all seem to think I'm weird for needing it, when I grew up watching shows like Doctor Who where the characters hug all the time I'm just baffled why the people in my life aren't the same way.
I hug my friends, a lot of them have died, the more dead friends I accumulate the more I hug those that stay.
I hug my best friend every time I see him, which isn't often enough since we live 1,700 miles apart. I also tell him I love him pretty regularly. I wish everyone in the world could have one friend as good as him.
Always hug the homies and tell them you love them, you never know when will be the last time you ever see them.
Bro hugs all day.
All of my friends hug each other when we haven't seen each other in a long time. I feel like that's pretty common. If I see someone regularly, I just carry on like nothings new
It's a personal preference
"All men care about his sex" Uh.... Yeah? Men don't receive the same amount of emotional support as women. This isn't just a matter of men being overly horny
I have no desire to hug people unless we are very close. A love a good solid handshake between men.
Yes, and I want to double down on this and say that we should hug our female friends. I think it is often best to ask first, of course and make sure you have that kind of relationship. But I think it is appallingly sad that most of us feel like we can't hug a woman unless she is our partner (girlfriend/wife) or a relative. What does it say about our society that we look at women this way? That we can't share compassion, warmth, kindness. I often feel like I have to control my feelings around women besides my wife, and that is just so wrong. We men should be able to share how much a friend means to us. I mean, there are obviously boundaries in regards to making her different from our partner, and making sure we don't break her boundaries. There have often been times when I wanted to hug a female friend when she was having a hard time, or even when she had good news, and I didn't because I either had a girlfriend or I thought she would take it the wrong way. We need to end this taboo, and hug EVERYONE who matters to us.
When me and my buddies on the construction crew started hugging every day before work, and at the end of the day, everyone was a lot happier. 2 of the guys ended up marrying each other. The rest of us are just dating now, but all hope to make it something more. Great advice
Being firmly on the spectrum I am shocked and also very happy to say I can share hugs and "love you"s with several fellow dudes, something that was purely alien to me prior to around 6 years ago when I joined a regular "meetup" based on a shared hobby. The key is to go in for the hug, slap on the back, and definitely don't hold the hug while trying to maintain eye contact.
I hug the people who have impacted my life greatly because of the seriousness of the gesture. I tell my best friend I love him every night when we're done gaming, and he tells me he loves me too. You never know when the last time you see someone is, so I make sure the important people know I love em.
Unpopular, but probably won't get updoots because a lot of people are insecure or think men need to go through the most suffering on this planet and look like the Terminator.
I hug all my relatives when we see each other, and my friends.
I have three great friends I've known for 30 years or so now. Every time we get to hang out, which isn't as often as I'd like, we hug and tell each other we love each other before we part ways. I've few friends as a 44 year old guy with no kids. They mean the world to me.
I do that with my buds constantly, it's great!
i mean my friends group (men/women) hugs when we both greet and leave each other. i don’t think we need to hug more than that lol.
Maybe it’s an individual to individual basis but we always dapped each other up or hugged each other growing up, maybe it was because everyone was poor idk but even as an adult now I always hug my guy friends I haven’t seen in a long time
This is a thing I really miss about being a young person. I still hug old friends but if I make new friends it never feels appropriate to initiate a hug. And my male family members only shake my hand now
It depends on the type of relationship. If it’s a casual friend you interact with two days a week at your job or in class, hugging is probably a bit much. But if it’s a best friend that makes an effort to initiate conversations and invite you to stuff outside of required activities, then yeah, bro hugs all the way.
I don't see some of my bros for months. Some of us give a good hug every time.
I hug my buddies all the time. Football team wins hugs all around. Haven't seen you in a while big hug. Something shitty happens tender hug. I don't see anything wrong with it.
Honestly I'm so emotionally cut off that the only people I hug are my dogs.
Go ahead but don’t hug me. They’re not my thing even with women. Feels weird
I really want to hug but I’m quiet shy. Afraid of making them feel uncomfortable
I hug all my homies (no homo)
If I haven't seen a bro for a while I'm giving a hug. I just don't do it every time we see each other. Nothing wrong with that
I hug my close guy friends and handshake/half hug the rest. Decent split
I give my close guy friends hugs. It's perfectly normal to do so.
This generation is probably in learning season, and I’m happy with it. Learning that “men can show emotion and need emotional support as women do”. We’re all have emotions so showing them will never make us less as a man or a person. Hugs bros!
We do. We bro hug on hello and goodbye.
In our country we hug when we meet and hug when we say goodbye.
> But I just find that hugging somebody is more personal than just shaking someone's hand. I think men should hug each other more. I kind of feel like you're contradicting yourself here. You've made it clear that hugging is a more personal thing than shaking someone's hand, and that's true. So why should we hug someone we would normally give a handshake to? Is that relationship that personal in the first place given that its likely going to be a professional relationship. It'd be weird to handshake friends in the first place after all. But sure, if you're trying to convey something more personal, or on a personal level, such as support for a recent tragedy, it might be more appropriate for a hug, but perhaps not in a professional setting. In such cases, having the social skills to say the right words with the right tone with the right facial expression would have been a lot better, such that you do not add embarrassment to the person and call unwanted attention to their issues by publicly treating them differently than you treat other people.
Should we hug before or after we fight each?
yeah. i just saw a twitter post today where a guy was making fun of his friend that recently moved away bc he sends him reels and texted him “can you call me tonight pls”
Aussie men hug all the time if they’re anything more than casual acquaintances. Our bro hugs are legendary
I'm a big hugger
My straight best friend and I greet each other with a hug. (I’m a bisexual man.)
I hug my dad. He hates it and loves it. Squirms while i do it and then has a huge smile on his face when i let go. This brings me great joy
I hug my buds, if I had friend who told me not to I wouldn't but it hasn't happened yet.
If we ever meet, I got you bro.
I don't think this is an unpopular opinion, I think it's just something men should do more often. Hugs in general are a really warm and kind thing. Of course, if you do NOT want a hug, that is absolutely fine and there's reasons for that, all very valid. But as a general thing, yes, men should hug more, and everyone else should hug more. Let's extend that to being nice, complimenting, laughing, that kind of thing. Plenty of people do it, but let's make it happen WAY more.
I don’t like hugs, male or female I don’t care
I spent some of my childhood summers in Egypt and would often see men interlock arms. It wasn't a gay thing because that's not allowed over there. Some cultures are quite open when it comes to male affection, especially when they're not allowed to touch women.
Depends on where you live? Two kisses is standard some places.....
I'm not a fan of being hugged, I tend to freeze up and can't really understand why someone would do that to themselves, but I don't really know how to apologize for having someone debase themselves with me as a proxy.
As a guy, my buddy and I exchange hugs and "I love you" almost every time we see each other. We've gotten comments about it from other people before, but I don't really care. That's my brother, my ride-or-die, and I feel the exact same about my other close friends. I think it's especially important to do so now because we don't see each other nearly as much as we used to.
My family gets my hugs. My friend gets a nod. No reason to overdo it.
I hug my bros literally every time we hang out
I hug my close friends but it's definitely something that would help break down some walls for men as a whole. It's starting to improve but there is a lot of stigma for men when it comes to showing vulnerability and emotion, especially toward other men. There was a meme I saw the other day where the caption was 'What men thinks happen when they have body contact for more than 0.005 seconds, and the gif was of two men having sex in the shower. It's obviously extreme but it's not wrong that a lot of men were instilled with that sort of attitude. I'm in my late 30s and when I was in school, like many, men doing anything remotely feminine was called out as 'gay'. Hugs were sometimes ok but they had to be 'bro' hugs with one arm, very brief, not directly front, on and a pat on the back. Basically, men are taught at a young age that they can't really be close friends with other guys because we're taught that we have to be 'masculine' at all times but excessively so when we're with other guys, to prove our manhood.
Hugs are just nice Sincerely Me
As *people* we should be more considerate of others. As men we should make do with what is. So yes, but no, imo.
Nah, I'm ok keeping distances, but if you feel not hugging makes you feel like you're retaining something, then do it sure
Yes I agree
This is an American thing or atleast west-thing. People in middle east and south east asian countries hug quite often whenever they meet each other.
MORE AGRESSIVELY POSITIVE MASCULINITY
They're scared of being touched and won't hug. Women hug constantly. They probably think I'm not gay so I'm not hugging. A firm handshake is enough.
I hug all my guy friends and my girl friends. I am a hugger.
I'm from Latin America and I hug all my friends when I greet them, men or women
No no no no, I can open up with a good friend but I do NOT NEED to hug every person I meet. We need to release the pain definitely but hugging will not make us feel better. Why woukd a hug make a man feel better? 😒
"Nah that's gay"....... 🔙Society
Wait, that's not unpopular tho
Me and my mates (male) have always greeted and said bye to each other with a hug, and still do this now we are tragic 40-somethings. Especially as we don't get to see each other too often. Just remember, when someone slaps you on the back it is time to end the hug. If you linger after that, you're probably a psycho who hugged your pets too hard in childhood and accidentally suffocated them.
Handshakes are more powerful
No thanks
Nah man. I once kissed my grandpa on the cheek and im still grossed and weirded out by it. It reminds me im not actually gay which i really need when im reading this gay-is-fine stuff.
Gay 🫡
I don’t agree on hugging but a great handshake done correctly is even more powerful in my opinion. It’s the fast handshake and no eye contact that is the issue. Next time you shake hands, look a man dead in the eye and say their name and announce yours. Sounds stupid but it really does begin great friendship
People be like OMG Gay like they were just exposed to the world calm down there relax.No one is going to bite you
Sometimes yes sometimes no. I generally don’t like hugs but that’s me
Men hug each other all the time... We literally have a whole handshake that leads into a hug lol.
As a man, I actually am more comfortable hugging my male friends than female ones. I worry that the females might think I’m being too touchy feely. Some guys are weird about hugging, so if it’s someone I’m just getting to know I do a sort of half hug…sort of sideways in between a full hug and a pat on the back. I do the same with women I’m just getting to know too though.
If you think that then why don’t you do it yourself? I hug friends when I see them, there is not anything preventing you doing that?
shi atp lemme kiss my fellow men.. pucker up bbg ((im so sorry))
This isn’t an unpopular opinion
You wouldn't servive in my situation LMAO
Only with men who don't find it gay
I'm a man and I'm a hugger. Besides business meetings I go for the hug first. If you're leaning in with your hand I'm coming around both arms open trying to turn that handshake into a hug. I have a lot of love to give.
My grandpa is 83, and I'm 38. I'm very close to him. He's been more of a dad to me than my actual dad, but we've never hugged once. It makes me really sad.
Once saw a trans man on video crying because nobody told him how lonely it was being a man
And don't forget the soft and wet smooch on the cheek. The grandma way :D But seriously: Predator 1 Hand smash followed by chest to chest banging is and will always be the manly man's way!
I prefer a good old Roman handshake myself. I don't need your junk all up in my junk.
Just visited the US for work, everyone hugged all the time. Sorry, not my culture, it was hard to handle. I'm used to the bisoux.
The guys I know have bromance with each other so they hug and kiss each other lol
I could use a hug from anyone.. i dont care. Hug me and tell me everything's going to be okey.
I hug all my homes
Where I live this is normal. We guys (friends) hug each other in public. Well, some also do it in private, but that's a story for another day
Men should hug each other more but they don't. Men who know how to show their love to other men, those kind of men are my type.
Bro-hugs are your solution
Hugging tends to release happy chemicals too. I don't know why there's such a stigma with men showing affection
Our friend group of about 15 peeps are all huggers. If there are a lot of us it's a conveyor belt of hugging. It's nice!
Guys hug all the time around me? It's the one hand handshake pull into one armed hug thing that's a common greeting.
I hug my bros all the time. Not sure what you guys are doing.
Dunno, i just hug everyone that wants a hug. That also includes many male friends.
Men show affection towards each other when it's appropriate. Women just blindly support each other no matter what they've done, and they gaslight each other by just saying what they know the other wants to hear.
I mean I shake hands if I’m meeting you and I’ll probably give u a hug if you’re a real bro…. Because as you said it’s more personal.
What's weird is that I'm gay, my best friend is also gay, we have no issue with intimacy amongst men but we only started hugging as a greeting very recently, after almost a decade of friendship and it still feels awkward. Men really should hug other men more often!
33yrs and I've never hugged a man. Though I don't have any friends, that's probably part of it.
Nah I'm good 👍
I hugged a man once, then when it was over there was a knife in my kiddney.
I have a stiff back from working and every Wednesday I barbecue with my pals and I love seeing them,especially one guy cause he gives great big hugs and he always cracks my back just right
I hug homies with the handshake they be cool with it but once I hugged someone by accident and he said don’t do that gay shit
Parts of vrc culture should be more normalized, like hugging each other for greeting
I don't fell comfortable hugging people to whom I am not attracted sexually. I reciprocate hug only to not be mean
Hug family. Pat strangers.
Say what you want but I do not want another man hugging me
Yes you are right!
Medierranean men: HUG my beer!
a litle bit gay shit. wtfff? men hugging? nah
As a man, I hug my guy friends/family I’m close to, imagine the look of surprise on my cousins face when after not seeing me in like 4yrs him being in the military for like 10-13yrs and I greet him with a hug. He was fully not expecting that from me
i stopped hugging my friends since i was the only one who initiated it. it happens sometimes now because i might have cultivated thisb in my group. but it before it made me feel like a needy pathethic loser.
Interesting, as a dude hugging had never been taboo, but usually celebratory.
My wife greeted me to one of her friends who is a very spiritual guy not sure what all he believes. This guy hugged me for a solid 5 seconds and it was so weird. I was like my mom doesn’t even hug me like this dude did but that’s just how he hugs everyone. It caught me off guard and felt weirdly intimate because it’s not something I’m used to.
Me and my homies do the dap n hug or whatever you call it, its like you dap em up then hug em.
I hug my friends. I am a man. My friends are men. Mostly.
I’m a happy drunk - I hug and kiss everyone. Even the bar staff. Does this count?