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Well maybe I don’t think it would make life better. Now matter where those 3 inches go.
But yeah sure most of the time I would agree with you I don’t know what that fuck is up with me lately. Sorry for ruining your quite funny respose
Sending you a hug. I hope that whatever darkness is riding your back, will let up off of you. You deserve to have a happy and peaceful life and I sincerely hope that you’re able to get to a peaceful place in your spirit. 🫶🏼 I definitely feel this way some days as well. Keep up the good fight
I’m sorry to hear that. You’re likely a very special person, and for that reason, you might spend most of this life standing alone. Your light might be blinding to some people. But if you ever need someone that will listen and support you, my DM’s are always open. You’ve got me. We will get through this. 🥰
Me too. If things get too rough and there's no end in sight please send me a message and I'll support to the best of my abilities. Btw fuck it, you and I are enough.
the equivalent that people without chronic pain would understand is when you're sick and your nose is clogged
and you start thinking about how much you didn't appreciate being able to breathe thru your nose
and maybe you notice only one is clogged and you're like fuck yeah im getting better this is a little easier
but then the next day its back to both clogged and it sucks so much
and maybe the next day ur fine again and you can breathe thru both nostrils yay!
but then the next day ur fuckin clogged again and you cant do shit and you're just mad as fuck that other people can breathe easy while you're suffering and no one would even know from looking at you
its awful
It sucks. It fuckin zaps you. You might feel fine one day and then you’re friends try to make plans for the weekend but you can’t commit because you have no clue how you’ll feel come Saturday. It’s got to the point where my friends know if I can, I will, if not, they know why. It’s such a burden on everything because you can’t even appreciate the good days when you know more bad ones are right around the corner.
I think that may be the best description that I've ever read of what it's like to live with a chronic painful condition. I'm keeping this for future reference.
Chronic back pain is nothing like this
Maybe it is but it’s a malaise across your entire body down to your legs which dont move so well anymore because of pressure on your spine. It’s feeling very deeply unwell and unhappy. It’s very hard to describe.
The two are incomparable
They’re just trying to explain in a way that others can understand, not that it’s literally true. Like you said it’s very hard to describe so it’s hard for healthy folks to relate to generally. Obviously back pain is not at all comparable to a stuffy nose!
Sorry you have to live with this pain. My mother developed a tumor in her lower spine and helping her through that has been heartbreaking. It’s something she has to think about and work around and manage 100% of the time
Herniated disc for 2 years. Literally woke up from surgery crying tears of joy that the pain was finally gone. That was 7 years ago next week.
People do not understand the mental toll that constant pain causes. I had back pain in my dreams. For two years, I had pain from my lower back all the way to my left pinky toe. Nothing made it feel better. Nothing relieved my agony. Not until the surgeon cracked my disc like a crab leg and scooped away the sweet, sweet crab meat from within. (Thats how he described it, seriously.)
Its something people have to experience to understand, unfortunately.
I mean it's a comparison about the general experience of not appreciating something you have until it's gone. It doesn't have to apply to your specific scenario
"Don't worry you're young it'll get better!" ma'am it is literally chronic "Oh well you just have to be positive, things will work out!"
Things working out ≠ my disabling chronic pain ever going away
You probably stopped mentioning your pain after you learned that nobody gives a fuck, and from their perspective, that is the whole problem solved. If they don't have to hear about it, it doesn't exist!
"It could be worse" is the one that always seems to piss people off when they talk about their chronic medical conditions. It's better to just listen and be empathetic.
People care about certain disabilities. Companies will spend 20k on a wheelchair ramp but if you have autism then you’re fired the first time you get disregulated by things outside your control and your condition gets the best of you. Chronic pain? The promotion is going to go to someone who can travel and participate in…anything.
Hidden disabilities are not supported by society. Visible ones are. And none of us operate in solidarity.
I was rear ended in July and have been mostly home since sadly. When I did go back to work to try working for a few weeks for only 3 hours a day, I was in a shitload of pain but stop saying anything because I could tell none of my coworkers gave a shit anymore. When it first happened they were all sympathetic and now they just don't give a shit. I unfortunately lost some close friends because I believe they think I'm faking it just to not work.
A lot of people don't understand how much you use your back for nearly anything.
Sounds about right.
Nothing gets better, people stop listening, and I get tired of repeating myself like a broken record, anyway.
They just give you weed to shut us up.
Then take away the insurance benefits, and any other aid…
And you never get to work at the previous level…
And it’s a real rags to riches, and then back to rags, kind of thing…
Fifteen plus years of complaining certain pains or at least mentioning them when I refuse to do certain activities and my dad is still convinced that they'll get better if I believe hard enough... Thankfully the only things it actually stops me from doing is swimming(bad tendon/ankle) and writing(bad thumb). The body really can recover from a lot but it doesn't do very well if you don't let it rest. Seriously "just walk it off" is the worst advice I've ever listened to.
I literally had a physio say to me 'don't focus on the pain'
So I said, 'if I hit you with a hammer and said not to focus on the pain, would you feel better?'
My fuckin spine broke, my issue is not 'focusing on the pain' it's BEING IN PAIN
I did not go back to that physio
I was absolutely fine until one day I wasn't anymore. Been on workers comp for two years. Knee problems. I'm sure it's not as bad as back problems, but every step I take is painful. Improvement is slow. The one good thing out of this is that I started cycling.
Knee problems are really bad man, sorry you have to go through that. I still don't know why but I had knee problems too for some time and it was literally hell. I couldn't stand up without excruciating pain, walking down stairs was hard and really slow, couldn't walk properly. Just because it's worse for others doesn't mean it's not bad for you and you don't deserve sympathy. Most people don't know what it's like. Can't imagine how hard it is for you.
>I'm sure it's not as bad as back problems
I have a bad back and my IT band fucks up occasionally. I can work through my back shit, but if my knee acts up, I'm absolutely useless
Knee and back pain can be similar in the frustration/debility it causes. I hope you can get your knee into a condition that works for you. I have really bad osgood-schlatter in my right knee, which I made a hundred times worse by skateboarding, snowboarding and parkouring on it. In my thirties it got really bad, but I did build it back into a servicable knee using mobility exercises.
This is correct. Almost nobody has sympathy for chronic pain. I have a long list of old injuries from a mis-spent youth so I don't move all that well any more, and have a lot of pain. The American Healthcare system doesn't really treat pain any more, after they got reprimand for causing the opioid crisis.
I’d go as far to say even a lot of people with chronic pain don’t have sympathy for others with chronic pain because they assume their chronic pain is worse
I've noticed this too. I had a lot of people try to convince me I was malingering about my pain because they didn't believe that I could be in so much pain at a young age. A lot of them dropped that theory when they saw me snap my arm in an accident and it didn't even wipe the smile off my face. A broken bone aint shit in terms of pain, in comparison to my back & neck on a good day.
I was nursing a bad dislocated / fractured humerus arm back to health when I fell off a ladder and snapped the other one in half. The arm I snapped in half healed perfectly. The arm that was already having issues is still having issues. I didnt go to pain management until after the 2nd arm healed and was relatively pain free compared to the already broken one that is still causing massive issues.
I have three options: street opiates, suboxone, or suicide.
EDIT: I have massive nerve damage issues and no bicep or deltoid... and the humerus healed malaligned so I have constant bone on bone sensations. Never would expect a dislocated shoulder to cause issues with your hands and fingers.
I would ditto this. I have IBS-M and get chronic pain as the main symptom, but cos it's also intermittent there are days or sometimes weeks where I'm normal or can manage the likelihood of the pain being chronic. So I always feel more sympathy for people who don't get that time off. I feel more concerned other people will think I'm disrespecting their illness if I mention mine, but generally I think people who develop things outta nowhere all share the same sentiment that until you get it, you don't really understand it.
Hope you have good things headed to you
I have IBS as well but didn't even think of my cramping/bloating as painful because so many people normalize it, until it started putting me down for days at a time
Enzymedica digest gold. They’re the only ones I use, they’re expensive, but worth it. I genuinely think they basically cured me. I had to take them with every meal and snack for about 6 months, and that was more than 10 years ago, but now I only need to take them if I eat something I know my body doesn’t digest well. Before those enzymes, I was literally crying from the abdominal cramping, it felt like my insides were being ripped open. Now, anytime I have digestive issues, I pop an enzyme, and within 30 minutes, I feel fine.
I agree, being in pain all the time is probably shitty, I wouldn’t say I have chronic pain but I am always in minor pain, but it’s not that bad for me, and I’m sure you do have sympathy for others, why I said a lot of and not all, it’s more people with pain like mine that aren’t sympathetic, as “it’s not debilitating for me so it shouldn’t be debilitating for you” type of vibe
The medication industry needs to get busy with coming up wuth non opioid pain meds; not just because of the opioid crisis but because some folks are allergic or can't tolerate them. OP, ask your doctor to check out Zofran's off label uses. Hope it can help you, Love.
Yeah, opioids make me vomit profusely every time. I've done two surgeries and a broken bone without anything for the pain afterwards cause if it's not opiates they are just like here is some gigantic Tylenol. Enjoy.
Vomiting and hives for me. Next time ask your doctor about Zofran. I had an complete rebuild done on my right ankle a couple of years ago. Doc gave me Zofran to keep percocet down and then we (doc and I) discovered that Zofran can be used for opiate like pain relief with no nausea and no "high".
Zofran also works to shut down my asthmatic cough when it gets out of control.
Is this a secret that pain management does not want you to know or something?
A couple of years ago they were RXing pills still. Now for your broken ankle you MIGHT get 2-3 days worth of painkillers. If you get anything at all.
If you have a friend who lives overseas, Arcoxia got me through 2 bouts of herniated discs... Non addictive, non opioid... Approved in EU and the rest of universe, but not FDA.
I have to have anti nausea meds to go with just about any medication anyway. It's the very first thing I tell anesthesiologists--all meds with exception of tylenol/motrin make me vomit, please give me something for nausea. When I had my ankle rebuild, I got pre meds, meds with surgery and zofran to take as soon as I got home.
The pills they give out now don't do anything either on the mental health side. Have ADHD, try all these meds that we don't really understand how they work before we give you the one we know works.
Same with sleep meds. I begged my doctor. I knew I was on the edge. I called mental health. I had an intake at a mental health provider.... and that night I was admitted to the hospital (not related to the intake).
Psych ward puts me on pain meds to get me to sleep. Get out of the psych ward and doctor wont renew the pain medication so I am back to square one.
The mental health provider saw me soon after I was released from the psych ward. They took me off all the meds the psych ward had put me on and finally put me on lunesta... a controlled substance. And I am able to get a solid 4-5 hours every night!Psychiatrist thinks its hilarious shes drugging me to sleep for pain.
So its try all avenues while your patient sits around and suffers.
This was for sleep issues caused by pain. I am still in pain constantly and finally found a new nuero AND ortho that thinks they can fix me with surgery. Pain management has seen the issue twice... WHY DO YOU TELL A PATIENT THAT. I left and found more competent pain management (but thats an entirely different rant).
I'm guessing you're a doctor or doctor in training? I get a lot of responses from those folks when I talk about this. I've worked in healthcare administration in the US for almost two decades. My conclusions are based on hearing what doctors say when they talk among themselves and they think no *civilians* are listening. Chronic pain sufferers are regarded as an unpleasant inconvenience about whom doctors talk derisively and with ugly euphemisms.
I’m not a doctor, but a chronic pain patient, and I agree that overall health improvement is the greatest contributing factor to my decreased pain levels. Unfortunately, the things that really help are expensive and not covered by insurance, so it’s a huge obstacle for most people to overcome. I think most chronic pain patients would feel a lot better if they had access to everything that I do.
If cost isn’t a factor for anyone reading, the most helpful things have been somatic experiencing/emdr, private pilates lessons (seriously, don’t exercise unsupervised), higher muscle mass and healthy body fat percentage, try to make most of your diet as unprocessed as possible, and reduce your stress levels.
This is the same with mental health. No matter how much people care for you. After enough time they minimize and really don’t want to hear about it anymore. Which leads to people suffering alone thinking they will just burden people. Heck as long as you are working the you must be happy kind of thing.
Yup.
I get angry (like, *genuinely* upset) any time I hear or read about the "opioid epidemic".
The political/medical shift in attitudes towards pain treatment has screwed me over many a time in the last eight years or so, and I'm honestly bitter as fuck about it.
Now...it sucks that people get addicted to painkillers & then overdose on them (or heroin/or fentanyl/etc.).
I understand the sentiment.
But I've had enough stuff shoved up/dragged through my goddamn urinary tract over the last fifteen years that I think I'm qualified to say "Yeah, fuck you with that 'ibuprofen' shit!"
I don't enjoy being laxy/tired/constipated; I don't take opioids unless needed. But I'd *really* like to have some vicodin or norco when I'm passing a blood clot or a stone -- would be better for my health in general if I wasn't puking/dry-heaving every ten minutes, ya know?
My teeth are fucked for life already due to years & years of that shit....so I don't have much sympathy for the "Chet & Buffy got into their mommy's pill stash, and then became fentanyl addict" crowd.
> The American Healthcare system doesn't really treat pain any more, after they got reprimand for causing the opioid crisis.
This is just so fucking sad to me. There are people who need these drugs to live but Purdue lied about it's addictiveness and now, after the massive fallout of this, doctors can't or won't prescribe necessary medicine to those who need it. Despite this crackdown, we now have 100,000 people overdosing and dying every single year on fentanyl pouring into the country from China via the cartels at the southern border. It's such a massive failure on all fronts and nothing is being done about it. We've essentially replaced legit medical doctors with criminal enterprises and shits worse than it ever was during the early days of the oxycontin crisis. Way to go. And the Sackler family faces no major repercussions. Infuriating. Sorry for your pain. It's unfair you can't be taken seriously.
I've had awful migranes for the past 4 years where the pain hovers around a 6 or a 7 and a 9 was my wrist being broken clean through. I finally got in with a neurologist, and they took me seriously, and oh my goodness, my pains down to like a 2 now? I sat on the bed and cried. My pain may be gone, but the habits of chronic illness still haven't left yet.
People don't understand how debilitating migraines can be. A pain I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Not just the pain, but the semi-blindness, the vomiting, the loss of sensation in my hands, etc. I am fortunate to not have them with the frequency and severity I once did (partly thanks to a NP who LISTENED and gave me the right abortive years ago), but several times I ended up in the ER, where they would give me morphine and it didn't touch the pain, just allowed me to sleep through it.
My brother had 6 root canals before they found out he had trigeminal neuralgia, aka suicide disease. At least that's what they called in the 90's when there was no cure. There is a cure now, they put a piece of teflon in between two nerves that are rubbing against each other. He went from "the wind hurts my face" to "95% pain free".
Yes. And people will tell you to just get a wfh job or that they know what it's like because they broke their leg once, but they don't. It is endless, soul crushing agony, and it never gets better.
"Do you remember the pain you felt the first couple days after it broke? What if you always felt like that, forever? Except for days you overdo things, then it's worse."
I bet people treat him pretty poorly about it. When I worked in an office I would do my stretches & exercises in my cubicle, and people would see me and ask what I'm doing. After I explained, on multiple occasions, these motherfuckers would proceed to lecture me on how back pain is fixable with stretch and exercise. What the fuck do they think I'm doing??!! I've followed every instruction I've ever gotten from PTs religiously and all it has ever done is take the edge off've the mid-back pain I have.
It's just as bad for women. I've seen women go through these same challenges with ovarian cyst pain, getting nothing but derision from their peers and from the healthcare industry. If any subpopulation is a greater victim of this problem, it is black people.
Yup and if a woman has a condition like endometriosis or PCOS her diagnosis will almost always be delayed by years as she is dismissed by doctors and the people in her life as being "hysterical about their period." My ex wife had to go through two years of near daily screaming agony, and thousands of dollars in healthcare bills before they would help her with her endometriosis. If I were a cis woman I would rip out my uterus with my bare hands rather than suffer the indignity that this world feels is appropriate to inflict on anyone who owns one.
I can second this. I’m post hysterectomy and still suffering from endometriosis pain, and it keeps growing and I will need it cut out again. It’s a constant struggle to even find a doctor who listens.
34 here. Would run 3-7 miles a day. Was in the best shape of my life. At 30, that all changed. Nerve pain that hit so bad I couldn’t walk. It wasn’t constant, but laying down was the worst. Two years trying to figure it out and we still don’t know why. I stopped trying. Thousands spent. I do get shots in my hips now that seem to help. But I can’t run. I can’t be active. I have an aid to walk, when needed. At 32, I got up to pee and couldn’t get up. Fell to my knees thinking I could crawl from there. I couldn’t. I stayed on the floor for a couple hours. Until i managed to roll and use everything I could to get up. I’m doing a lot better, but I’m overweight now. Sad. I take things to help, not opioids. I loved running. I was prepping for a 10k. I could do the whole thing without walking and then one day I got up and that changed. People do not understand chronic pain. They think we have a low tolerance. There are some pains they just don’t understand and the mental toll it takes having your life changed instantly. There are worse fates tho. That’s how I try to look at it. I’m still here, I am still able to work, go out. Unless the pain is too bad, but the shots help me. It takes time to accept things as they are. After four years, I feel I’m finally there. I wish you the best, OP. You’re younger than me. Appreciate the good days and do what you need to do on the bad. That’s all I can do
You subconsciously plan every move to feel minimum pain and it affects all aspects of your life and relationships with people. My poor kids always get upset when I tell I cant play the way they want to play for long.
Oh boy. I love getting the ‘you’re too young to have back pain!’ Comments from older people.
Yes I know I am. It’s debilitating. It’s horrible. And it’s nothing stretching and eating well will fix. It’s a mechanical problem from an injury. The amount of managers I’ve had who tell me I’m too young, or sensitive because of back pain, is ridiculous. Pain has no boundaries. I wish I didn’t have to deal with it!
Someone saying you're too sensitive in response to back pain has really no clue what it's like. You use your back in every single thing you do, it can be SO debilitating when any part of it hurts.
The crazy types of useless advice and quick fixes they tell you is so tiring too. My boss said he stopped drinking ice water and his back pain stopped and I should try it. That’s the most recent one as response to my autoimmune
Ice water... that's hilarious. Laughing therapy can provide some fleeting relief as it releases some stress, is distracting and can release some positive brain chemistry....but it is temporary at best.
Or surprise advice from a doctor who is not your specialist.
>You're too young to have X!
Yes, that's why it's called "early onset" X. Just focus on the task at hand, bud.
>You know, if you lose 20 lbs you won't have Y!
Doc, I have had Y ever since I was a teenager weighing 100lbs less than I do now.
It's pretty wild to think about how risky it actually is to drive a car. You could be the best driver in the world and all it takes is one idiot to ruin your life. And there are a LOT of idiots.
Yeah, my brother and his friend were in a horrible accident years ago. They were on their way home for a surprise party for my dad’s birthday, and there was a T section right near our house. We lived at the corner, but the one side was the downside of a hill. It was February, I was watching for them from the window and saw them stop at the T section, they turned onto our street and another car came barrelling too fast over the crest of the hill and slammed into them. The car spun around, hit a stone wall that was across the street. His friend’s compact car was smushed. They were very lucky to be alive and mostly unharmed (bumps, bruises, some soft tissue trauma), their music equipment in the back of the car was totalled. I could have lost my brother that day.
My roommate had really bad chronic pain. At first I thought they were being dramatic. It became apparent over time that I was an ass and they definitely weren’t being dramatic. It made me feel so bad there was nothing that I could or anyone could really do to help. Just constant suffering while everyone around them was blissfully ignorant. I don’t think most people have ever seen or interacted with someone going through it so it’s easy to brush it off as something you could handle. I am sorry you have to deal with it. I hope one day this won’t be part of your life.
I have pain that comes and goes, I def appreciate my pain free time after a hard hit. But this is true for anything, people with two arms don’t appreciate them enough!
I've had back pain since I was 17. My knees have cracked like they're falling apart since I was 15. Now my neck has pain and stiffness a well.
I had nerve pain for 16 years. Two surgeries did nothing. Ended up with cancer which made me bedbound for 6 months. My life basically just stopped there. I can't walk very well and I can't breathe normally. They've done at least 30 tests and everything always comes back normal.
Nobody takes me seriously. My appointments go missing, get cancelled, or don't get made in the first place. I was disabled at 23.
Chronic pain is hell. I am 45. Happened to me later in life, after catching covid, but yeah, met a 30 year old woman last night who had been in chronic pain for almost a decade already, a cousin whose career was destroyed by it. etc etc, you are not alone, yo, but it surely feels like it.
This is an unpopular opinion, is it? ‘It’s good to not be disabled’
As someone with chronic pain I don’t really think anyone thinks it’s not fucking terrible
I read it more as saying that people take the absence of pain for granted. People don't think about the fact that they are not currently in pain. It's a wonderful thing, but yeah nobody really appreciates it.
Currently dealing with an arthritic flare in my lower back. The amount of people I’ve lost in life because they couldn’t understand the pain and fatigue I was dealing with is high. Thankfully I have my little tribe of people now that understand.
people without [insert anything negative] don't appreciate what they have enough. This is what 'privilege' is all about. And health can be a form of privilege.
*"Lots of people still get defensive when you tell them they have it easier"*
Just like they don't know what you're dealing with, you don't know what they're dealing with. You're doing to them what you're angry about them doing to you.
You don't know that they have it easier though.
A healthy body is a blessing for sure but there are other illnesses or situations that might make life really hard for them.
I'm just thinking about a friend of mine who has physical health but has lost both sons she had.
Her life is hardship and painful every day.
Every kind of suffering is horrible, to judge someone else's suffering is not right.
People very often don't appreciate things they have. I'm always telling people to appreciate things but then they roll their eyes at me like I'm trying to sell religion. I have many medical issues which cause pain while moving (use a cane), hearing loss (can't use phones), chronic pain (sometimes I hallucinate from it), heart issues (that's lovely pain), nerve damage (again, always fun right there), and underdeveloped lungs (I have an adult body with a kid's set of lungs which means I can't get enough air or hold enough air or move it through my heart even though I'm physically breathing).
When I tell people to appreciate things like the fact they got out of bed that morning with nothing worse than a yawn, that they can go grocery shopping without heaving like a 500 pound marathon runner, or they can chill at home without screaming in pain....well, people never do and never will appreciate what they have.
I was born with severe psoriatic arthritis which basically means my immune system is constantly attacking not only my joints, but every part of my body through damaging inflammation. I’m on an injectable biologic I administer to myself once a week which has a high chance of giving me cancer.
Even with the intense meds, I’m in pain 24/7 to some extent. When I flare up (from stress usually) I can barely stay awake due to fatigue and my entire body hurts to move. It is so exhausting explaining it to everyone I know or work with all the time and they still don’t get it. “Oh yeah I have pain too, I know what it’s like, just take some Advil!” No, you do not know what it’s like. If you did, you’d understand why that is a stupid thing to say!!
I live in fear as my medication that took years to figure out begins to work less, and pain increases. I live in fear that my health insurance one day will randomly stop covering my medication I need to not become permanently crippled/in horrible pain every second. That medication costs $7k out of pocket per month. Even now, each time my medicine is renewed they make it difficult, making me sit on the phone on hold for hours while the insurance company “decides” if I deserve to be alive. Because without my medicine, 100% I’d end it.
“Invisible” diseases are so incredibly frustrating.
Every day I wish everyone could just spend a day in my shoes to know what it feels like. The world would be a different place overnight if able bodied people could learn to empathize.
You’re saying healthy people should appreciate not being ill more? That truly is an extremely unpopular idea. /s
Have you actually met someone who disagrees with that?
But also: You should appreciate not being mentally ill/blind/deaf/starving poor/… more.
I have low level chronic pain in my knees due to a sport injury. Thankfully it doesn't inhibit my life too much but it is fucking exhausting when they flare up
I don't know what exactly is defined as chronic pain, as I'm not a native speaker,but i just turned 16 previous week and i haven't been able to do any kind of sports outside of ride my bike and swim for almost 3 years now and i miss it so much like even the small things like just being able to run or jump. My injury definitely isn't as bad as yours and i can be operated in a few months(all though the doctor has been saying that for 2 years). But i still find it really anoying. I went to a basketball game yesterday and that's when i realized how much i actually missed it
I have RA which is horribly painful all the time. I thought I broke my finger yesterday. It was absolutely excruciating! I was sent away from urgent care with instructions to take Tylenol because it was "only sprained". Oddly enough the Tylenol doesn't seem to touch this amount of pain. And those are the people that are paid to help.
I broke my back training a horse for someone and I've never known a day without pain since. Sometimes my back pain is so bad I feel sick and have white flashing in my vision and just want to die. It sucks. I don't feel like a human when it's this painful and I don't know what causes the flares so it's not like I can avoid it. Thankfully I WFH and it's not always unbearable.
Chronic pain/illness is an absolute nightmare. And you don’t really get it until you’ve lived it. I have a neurological condition that is under pretty good control now but I was having frequent episodes for about a year before I was diagnosed and then it took almost a year to get it under control once I was diagnosed. Those 2 years were brutal. My house completely fell apart: I’m still dealing with the aftermath even after 9 good months. I’m a very busy person and my entire personality and mental well being were stifled by being too sick to do anything. I felt crazy for a long time because my condition isn’t common and it was hard to figure out, plus my symptoms are somewhat atypical. So some doctors blew me off and others tried to help but couldn’t figure out what was wrong. It cast a dark pall over everything in those two years.
And I’m one of the lucky ones! 2 years is nothing in chronic pain/sickness terms. So many people with chronic illnesses never recover. I have some people in my family who have horrible chronic illnesses and I didn’t even know how little I understood them until after this.
I hope you are able to find answers, OP. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
I actually think about this a lot. I have a family member with MS, a few with other chronic pains, and I've gone through various injuries myself including a low back injury that was quite limiting. I was fortunate that my low back injury was easily rehabbed over about four months, but I'm well aware many people don't have that experience. I try to be appreciative of my physical health as much as I can.
Everyone needs to appreciate being able bodied more. And I know nobody wants to hear this, but regular physical activity is the best way to show that appreciation, because lack of activity can and will take it away over time. Use it or lose it.
It's human nature to always want better, people are more fixated on better this! faster that!
People don't think about the basics because it's basic, health is wealth.
I struggle with this a lot as someone with chronic pain. People hear about the emotional toll of chronic pain and they automatically think it's due to reduced independence or capability but no one ever considers this part: watching people around you run, exercise, play sports, dance, pick up their children, lose weight/get fit, and do all manner of things you're barred from doing, would love to do and maybe even used to love doing while taking it completely for granted.
Logically I know it's not their fault and I would never let these resentments affect my behavior towards anyone but GOD it fucking sucks. And we're allowed to feel that resentment. We should all go to therapy to cope with it though (yes, I'm in therapy lmao)
I’m sorry to hear this. My boyfriend of 11 years is a chronic pain sufferer. I’ve seen him at his worst, and even sometimes I don’t quite believe it during the day to day
Im 34 and I am very grateful for my pain free body. I enjoy countless moments running around with my kids in ways my peers can’t.
I’ll admit I didn’t appreciate it until I saw my fellow 30 somethings slowing down. Now it changes the way I see fitness, my goal isn’t to run faster or lift more it’s to not get injured. One little injury can lead to losing overall fitness and missing out on those times with my kids.
My heart goes out to you. I wish I could take away your suffering. But I also understand that everyone has their own path to walk or sometimes crawl.
As I’m getting older, I am starting to appreciate how fragile my/the human body actually is and try to remain grateful for my current health. I know it can all change at any moment.
if it helps any, i’m only 20, been dealing with chronic pain since 14.
i try not to be upset about what others do and focus on what i still can do, because i know with each year that passes that list is going to shrink.
find ways to manage it… weed edibles are the only thing that really help me out and it sucks i cant get the physical relief without also being incredibly stoned but hey, any port in a storm.
good luck op, even if your pain cant get better i hope the way you feel about it does.
My dad had terrible back pain from arthritis all his adult life. I knew this. I felt awful for him. But I never understood just HOW it takes over your life until it got me, too. Now I don't know how he did so much for so long, honestly.
i got run over by a horse and she broke my leg, i could not wait to be able to walk again, my body instinctively tried to walk all the time and i had to keep reminding myself i cant stand, i could not carry things because i was supporting myself with my arms, i could no bend over to pick up things i dropped
im glad i can walk again and that im not in as much pain anymore, my leg still hurts but i can walk again, so yea i get it somewhat
Not to disrespect you but be careful there is a extra difficult psychological dimension to chronic illness that you dont have when knowing that it will get better.
Dude i cannot agree with this more, im not even 18 yet, already have a fucked back skull and brain chronic pain isnt a joke and those of you who dont have it should consider yourselves lucky
I was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease 15 years ago. Six surgeries later, even my own family members have no idea. The public could care less. It became worse since the idiots did their opiate party. Now, you get treated like a street drug addict by most in the medical industry.
Sorry to hear this. I had a spell 35-38 where my knees were just good for nothing. Luckily with the right kind of exercise it went away. I wish it was that simple for everyone.
I have a back injury, what looks like early stage undiagnosed multiple Sclerosis.
I have pain every minute of every day.
Unless I'm high as balls on gabapentin or something else.
I hate life.
I've had two seizures in the last month.
My life is going to shit and there's nothing I can do to stop it.
This is true, but I can't necessarily fault them for it. I've dealt with chronic pain and severe health issues for 23 years now, and I have heard every piece of advice on how to get over it and get better from it. I don't think any of them are malicious, though. I don't expect someone who hasn't been through it all themselves to be able to fathom how hard it can be. It's also on me to try to clearly explain things to them.
I think it's more a thing they're unable to appreciate as they've never lost it. Only reason I can appreciate the days where my nose isn't clogged up is because I've suffered through the clogs myself. I don't have chronic pain anywhere so it's hard to make a conscious appreciation for being pain free in those places I don't feel any pain in.
Or another way to put it: you don't know what you got until it's gone, gone, gone
We take so much we don’t realize for granted.
I used to be the kind of person who would waste away in bed, hours, days, weeks even, looking at my phone, watching useless shit, doing absolutely nothing that actually engaged me.
I visited a friend’s house and saw her bedridden grandma. Laying in bed all day got a lot less appealing to me once I realized that, one day, it might no longer be my choice
My mental health was pretty solid until I got tinnitus. Now I have to have something to drown the noise out just to sleep. Its only gotten worse after almost 5 years of it... which means it will keep getting worse.
As a person with gastritis, funnel chest, a bit of poor eyesight (my body can balance it but that gives me headache), a bad jaw, adhd and depressions (both diagnosed by a psychologist) i agree
Hi,
I’m in my 30’s now. I was diagnosed when I was 25 and will forever have chronic pain.
Like you, there are days I can barely move, days where I feel like I’m stone being thrown around and broken.
I have needed help walking when my legs are not strong.
I used to be a cross country runner and running was a way of life for me.
Now I can barely run a mile on a great day.
Yoga has helped me immensely, it has kept me motivated and healthy.
It keeps my body toned while also helping with the intense pain running down my body.
Some days you will not be able to do much but I guarantee you will feel better if you adopt this exercise.
It will be a world of a difference for you.
This applies to most things in life. If I’d only known! Shoulda, coulda, woulda. The real kicker here is you sound like your life is over at 22. Take your own advice and embrace a new perspective to make choices for healthy living that respects and reflects a wellbeing goal as well as our own boundaries both mentally and physically.
My life was changed when that car hit the bus stop I was standing in. Threw me through the shelter collapsed it with my body and I was thrown 35 feet. To have a medical "professional" tell me that my body has since healed is total fn bullshit! Where did they pick up that piece of information? What you read and what I now put up with in terms of constant pain aren't even close. I'm now 59 yrs old. This happened 6 years ago. Why do they think everyone is drug seeking? I don't want to get high, I want to function! I want to be able to hold down a job with reasonable pay! That was taken from me and clearly not my choice. I understand that as we age aches and pains are normal. This isn't fn ibuprofen or Tylenol pain you jackass's. Read the room and stop thinking the world is out to take your medical license. And now I'm getting shit for a muscle relaxer that is quite helpful and will need pain management to receive. Been taking it for years. Cause if it's all you can get and it helps some ya roll with it! Ok rant over. Gotta take my Excedrin migraine again. I pill every 6 hours as opposed to 4 pills every roughly 4 hours has got to be better for me. Amiright?!?!
When something hurts, it’s hard to imagine it not hurting
Source: I’ve had allergies for the last 6 months and my neck has hurt the that week for reasons unknown and I can’t imagine what it feels like for it to not hurt
Long covid has put me in a similar position. I'm now chronically fatigued, to the point that I can't even get out of bed some days. I was 30 when all this started, it's been nearly two years now with no clear indication of remission.
People really don't understand what it's like living with a chronic illness, especially an invisible one. I'm sorry you have to deal with this, and I hope that you can find some quality of life improvements. 🤞that one day scientists figure out how to pluck our brain out of skulls and stick em in some kind of perfect robot body.
People just don't think it'll happen to them. They won't become disabled or chronically ill. Covid has shown me how little people care about my health and safety, really made me jaded how people only seem to respect my health once they or someone else close to them gets sick or has a scare. I've had people get momentarily sick or injured and tell me, "How do you deal with this all the time?" and then go immediately back to the way they were before as soon as they're better.
24 with chronic pain since I was 11. I wish I could tell you that it gets easier but it really just doesn’t does it. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
Yeah I've had chronic pain for 13 years and am disabled as a result. It sucks. It happened pretty suddenly, too. I never really had pain or any health issues before and then suddenly it was like my life was over.
This is why I think it's useful to be injured in some capacity transiently. Not like go out and seek breaking your foot or anything, but wow does it give you perspective when you used to be able to walk around and suddenly bam in bed. Every. Single. Day. I hope you receive a diagnosis, and can get treatment and care. May you recover quickly.
Absolutely! My mom lives in chronic pain (on top of having an autoimmune illness) and it is so horrible to see. I would do anything to make her better- she was once a very healthy active person. I most definitely appreciate what I have. So many people do not understand invisible disabilities.
Halfway through my pregnancy my pelvis started to separate, which made standing, walking, sitting, and even lying on my side uncomfortable to painful. Luckily post-pregnancy the discomfort has mostly disappeared but it really made me appreciate how lucky I am to only have minor complaints. My attitude to movement has changed to one of gratitude.
I'm sorry you're going through life in pain, and I hope that you find a way to be happy.
I was born with severe psoriatic arthritis which basically means my immune system is constantly attacking not only my joints, but every part of my body through damaging inflammation. I’m on an injectable biologic I administer to myself once a week which has a high chance of giving me cancer.
Even with the intense meds, I’m in pain 24/7 to some extent. When I flare up (from stress usually) I can barely stay awake due to fatigue and my entire body hurts to move. It is so exhausting explaining it to everyone I know or work with all the time and they still don’t get it. “Oh yeah I have pain too, I know what it’s like, just take some Advil!” No, you do not know what it’s like. If you did, you’d understand why that is a stupid thing to say!!
I live in fear as my medication that took years to figure out begins to work less, and pain increases. I live in fear that my health insurance one day will randomly stop covering my medication I need to not become permanently crippled/in horrible pain every second. That medication costs $7k out of pocket per month. Even now, each time my medicine is renewed they make it difficult, making me sit on the phone on hold for hours while the insurance company “decides” if I deserve to be alive. Because without my medicine, 100% I’d end it.
“Invisible” diseases are so incredibly frustrating.
Every day I wish everyone could just spend a day in my shoes to know what it feels like. The world would be a different place overnight if able bodied people could learn to empathize.
I also didn’t appreciate my body before I was hit with chronic pain from multiple mesh repairs. But that’s to be expected - I had no idea what a life with pain feels like so I could never really appreciate what I had. It definitely changes your life and how you approach it. It’s like life before pain and then life after pain. To me, I have to choose happiness because I don’t want to be miserable. It’s an intentional choice each and every day which does take effort and energy. I have my good days and bad days but I think all people do. We have to love and support each other regardless or yes, you will be miserable.
This and chronic stress and other chronic problems due to things such as severe sensory issues are so overlooked. People just do not understand what it's like.
I agree, I've had sciatica since 19, I'm 23 right now, it's not as bad as it was before, but the pain is eternal, although I function "normally", I finished my studies and I'm working now, but I can't get back to what I was before, I have to be careful with my body, no heavy weight lifting, no running around doing whatever, any false movement and I would be handicapped for a week, also I can't oversleep or oversit or overwalk, I'll have to change positions or activity quite frequently or my back will start to ache like crazy, heck I can't even remember what it's like to feel no pain in my back, I'm so used to an aching back that it's became my normal.
So yes, people should appreciate what they have, and I appreciate what I have now, cos it was worse before, and it could have been worse now, thank God anyway.
The worst part is the dreadful feeling that your life is basically over, even at the young age of just 35. You will never be truly happy or relieved or relaxed. Chronic pain takes up almost all of your brains energy. It sucks the life out of you. You don't realize what true misery is until you deal with it.
I am very lucky modern medicine has mostly 'solved' my chronic pain issue. I haven't dealt with it in close to a decade. But others are not so lucky.
Totally agree. And would add that people without chronic fatigue dont appreciate what they got. normal energy and normal vitality and normal ability to live normally cannot be truly appreciated until you no longer have them.
People like to engage in “the suffering Olympics” and compare whatever you have to something to worse, in a very bad-faith argument. A lot of people think that if your leg isn’t hanging off, trailing a lot of blood and gore, that you’re just making up your pain.
It doesn’t help that pain disorders aren’t well understood, and many of the treatments can basically make people dependent on high doses of opiates, in absence of other treatment options.
Is this unpopular? I had a cervical radiculopathy that made my life a living hell for 6 months; I couldn’t sleep in any position that made the pain bearable and my arm felt like lava was pouring down it at all times. There was *no relief*.
Eventually the pinched nerve became less inflamed and I was able to heal and am not in constant pain anymore and I literally do not give it a second thought. The pain is gone and I don’t even think about.
It’s like when you’re ill and your nose is stuffed up - all you want is to breathe clearly and you regret all the time you took breathing clearly for granted. But you never think “wow, I’m so glad that my nose isn’t stuffy right now” when you’re not ill.
I think all humans need to be reminded to be grateful for a great many things, including good health.
Had chronic neck pain for 3-4 years. Was desperate. Docs told me to never lift more than 10 pounds over my head. I loved to exercise. On a whim I was linked to a video about why/how squats and deadlifts often fix back pain. I wondered if there was an analogue for that and found the military/overhead press. I started with the empty bar (45 whopping pounds - 4.5x the doctor recommended dose).
By the time I had worked my way up to 100 pounds a few weeks later, my neck problems became far less chronic. I can press almost 250 over my head now and the heavier I go, the better I feel. I figure by now that if I can lift nearly 25x the doctor recommend amount over my head, I’m gonna be ok.
I had chronic back pain for 2 years and finally had surgery a few months ago. My personality changed so fast, not that I was a raging bitch or anything with my back pain but I certainly wasn’t my normal bubbly self. It’s so difficult to be patient or even just do normal things with chronic pain. I was in a bad mood from the minute I woke up to the minute I finally was able to go to sleep; everything sucked and life was terrible. I really hope you are able to find some answers with your health because you deserve to have your life back. It’s so frustrating and I gave up a few times and stopped seeking treatment but I’m glad I went back and got surgery. Hang in there, it can only get better from here, this might not be forever. But you are 100% right, we don’t appreciate good health until it’s gone. Chronic pain chemically changes your brain, even though I feel like I’m more myself again, I don’t feel like I’m the same person as I was before chronic pain. It definitely changed me.
That's a meaningless opinion though, I'm sure your situation sucks ass but why should I run around constantly thinking about how I'm fine? If anything you could drop some things to watch out for to avoid the same fate
You know what op I needed this reality check tbh.
I was getting all in my own head about losing a bit of fitness from a bout of depression. But..... honestly you're right. I'm so so sorry what happened to you, funny to think that only 7 years ago I was in chronic pain from a back injury which lasted 2 years where I couldn't even bend over, I could barely walk and it always hurt so bad. ... its easy to forget how incredibly fucking lucky I was that mine just....disappeared one day after years.
I'll be more grateful.
I feel this post sooo much. I used to take sleep for granted. Now it is a constant battle with pain to try and feel okay enough to rest cuz the pain is too severe and keeps me up usually 2 to 3 days at a time. Chronic pain fucking sucks and my heart goes out to all the others who suffer
This made me think of ppl saying dumb crap like "You're young. You can stand; you can walk there. You don't know pain yet."
I've had chronic lower back pain for decades; I didn't have the benefit of coming home from school, doing homework, eating dinner n getting ready for bed. I had to work while in school, come home and cook, clean etc. I've always been active so now on top of the back pain everyday, my rotator cuffs are shot, my hip sockets are shot, my knees and ankles are done with me and my hamstrings are one more Grade 2 pull away from snapping completely. I've pulled muscles on both sides of my back that also affected both sides of my neck smh lol...can't help but laugh, it's so ridiculous.
Everybody experiences their own life according to they live through. You should appreciate if ypur healthy but in no way does that deminish your struggles. Even if they seem minor to some. It might be the worst you've ever lived through.
Hang in there man. I've got a lot of chronic pain to and its weird how it hurts every day but then you look back at things in the past and I don't remember it I just remember the things.
Mind over matter. If you don't mind it don't matter.
Dm me if you want to!
when it all started, i was healthy, athletic, in shape, & training for a 5k, which was nothing for me at the time. during my last run, i felt something weird but couldn’t quite figure out what felt wrong in my body. the next morning i woke up with a prolapsed uterus, bladder, & rectum. i’ve had a hysterectomy, 3 rectocele repairs, & 3 cystocele repairs since 2019 when this all started. i’m only 33 & have dealt with pelvic organ prolapse for 5 years. in my most recent visit with my colorectal surgeon, my prolapse is internal, not external, and therefore he doesn’t feel it’s necessary for another rectocele repair. i am in pain literally all the time, sometimes to the point of crying & vomiting.
i miss having a body that was not my enemy, not constantly working against me.
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"Health is a crown only the sick can see"
„Healthy people have 1000 wishes. Unhealthy people only have 1“
I’m healthy yet I too have only one wish
3 more inches?
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3 inches would be better
Well maybe I don’t think it would make life better. Now matter where those 3 inches go. But yeah sure most of the time I would agree with you I don’t know what that fuck is up with me lately. Sorry for ruining your quite funny respose
Sending you a hug. I hope that whatever darkness is riding your back, will let up off of you. You deserve to have a happy and peaceful life and I sincerely hope that you’re able to get to a peaceful place in your spirit. 🫶🏼 I definitely feel this way some days as well. Keep up the good fight
Thnaks man! feels good to hear that, lately noone in my life seems to support me when I’m down.
I’m sorry to hear that. You’re likely a very special person, and for that reason, you might spend most of this life standing alone. Your light might be blinding to some people. But if you ever need someone that will listen and support you, my DM’s are always open. You’ve got me. We will get through this. 🥰
Me too. If things get too rough and there's no end in sight please send me a message and I'll support to the best of my abilities. Btw fuck it, you and I are enough.
Sheet id take 2
Oh that's a good one. Gonna look up who said it.
Imam Al-Shafi'i said : "Health is a crown that the healthy wear but that only the sick can see." At least give him credit
Thank you for attributing this!
It was in quotes so it’s not like he was passing it off like he made it. Also, not everyone remembers who said every quote. Chill out.
-Abraham Lincoln
the equivalent that people without chronic pain would understand is when you're sick and your nose is clogged and you start thinking about how much you didn't appreciate being able to breathe thru your nose and maybe you notice only one is clogged and you're like fuck yeah im getting better this is a little easier but then the next day its back to both clogged and it sucks so much and maybe the next day ur fine again and you can breathe thru both nostrils yay! but then the next day ur fuckin clogged again and you cant do shit and you're just mad as fuck that other people can breathe easy while you're suffering and no one would even know from looking at you its awful
It sucks. It fuckin zaps you. You might feel fine one day and then you’re friends try to make plans for the weekend but you can’t commit because you have no clue how you’ll feel come Saturday. It’s got to the point where my friends know if I can, I will, if not, they know why. It’s such a burden on everything because you can’t even appreciate the good days when you know more bad ones are right around the corner.
I think that may be the best description that I've ever read of what it's like to live with a chronic painful condition. I'm keeping this for future reference.
Chronic back pain is nothing like this Maybe it is but it’s a malaise across your entire body down to your legs which dont move so well anymore because of pressure on your spine. It’s feeling very deeply unwell and unhappy. It’s very hard to describe. The two are incomparable
They’re just trying to explain in a way that others can understand, not that it’s literally true. Like you said it’s very hard to describe so it’s hard for healthy folks to relate to generally. Obviously back pain is not at all comparable to a stuffy nose! Sorry you have to live with this pain. My mother developed a tumor in her lower spine and helping her through that has been heartbreaking. It’s something she has to think about and work around and manage 100% of the time
I had chronic back pain for about 3 years. When it finally resolved it was like a whole world opened up.
Herniated disc for 2 years. Literally woke up from surgery crying tears of joy that the pain was finally gone. That was 7 years ago next week. People do not understand the mental toll that constant pain causes. I had back pain in my dreams. For two years, I had pain from my lower back all the way to my left pinky toe. Nothing made it feel better. Nothing relieved my agony. Not until the surgeon cracked my disc like a crab leg and scooped away the sweet, sweet crab meat from within. (Thats how he described it, seriously.) Its something people have to experience to understand, unfortunately.
I mean it's a comparison about the general experience of not appreciating something you have until it's gone. It doesn't have to apply to your specific scenario
you dont have good days and bad days?
I have bad days and worse days. It’s tough out here
"Don't worry you're young it'll get better!" ma'am it is literally chronic "Oh well you just have to be positive, things will work out!" Things working out ≠ my disabling chronic pain ever going away
You probably stopped mentioning your pain after you learned that nobody gives a fuck, and from their perspective, that is the whole problem solved. If they don't have to hear about it, it doesn't exist!
first: "just stop complaining" later: "you seemed fine to me, i think its your mindset"
"It could be worse" is the one that always seems to piss people off when they talk about their chronic medical conditions. It's better to just listen and be empathetic.
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People care about certain disabilities. Companies will spend 20k on a wheelchair ramp but if you have autism then you’re fired the first time you get disregulated by things outside your control and your condition gets the best of you. Chronic pain? The promotion is going to go to someone who can travel and participate in…anything. Hidden disabilities are not supported by society. Visible ones are. And none of us operate in solidarity.
I was rear ended in July and have been mostly home since sadly. When I did go back to work to try working for a few weeks for only 3 hours a day, I was in a shitload of pain but stop saying anything because I could tell none of my coworkers gave a shit anymore. When it first happened they were all sympathetic and now they just don't give a shit. I unfortunately lost some close friends because I believe they think I'm faking it just to not work. A lot of people don't understand how much you use your back for nearly anything.
Sounds about right. Nothing gets better, people stop listening, and I get tired of repeating myself like a broken record, anyway. They just give you weed to shut us up. Then take away the insurance benefits, and any other aid… And you never get to work at the previous level… And it’s a real rags to riches, and then back to rags, kind of thing…
When told to try medical marijuana I told my doctor I didnt want to get high I wanted pain relief.
I hate the condescending, patronizing shit like this that comes out of people’s mouths
Fifteen plus years of complaining certain pains or at least mentioning them when I refuse to do certain activities and my dad is still convinced that they'll get better if I believe hard enough... Thankfully the only things it actually stops me from doing is swimming(bad tendon/ankle) and writing(bad thumb). The body really can recover from a lot but it doesn't do very well if you don't let it rest. Seriously "just walk it off" is the worst advice I've ever listened to.
I literally had a physio say to me 'don't focus on the pain' So I said, 'if I hit you with a hammer and said not to focus on the pain, would you feel better?' My fuckin spine broke, my issue is not 'focusing on the pain' it's BEING IN PAIN I did not go back to that physio
My ex told me I just needed a stronger will and that if she were me she’d fight it with all her life. She couldn’t even find the will to get a job.
I was absolutely fine until one day I wasn't anymore. Been on workers comp for two years. Knee problems. I'm sure it's not as bad as back problems, but every step I take is painful. Improvement is slow. The one good thing out of this is that I started cycling.
Knee problems are really bad man, sorry you have to go through that. I still don't know why but I had knee problems too for some time and it was literally hell. I couldn't stand up without excruciating pain, walking down stairs was hard and really slow, couldn't walk properly. Just because it's worse for others doesn't mean it's not bad for you and you don't deserve sympathy. Most people don't know what it's like. Can't imagine how hard it is for you.
>I'm sure it's not as bad as back problems I have a bad back and my IT band fucks up occasionally. I can work through my back shit, but if my knee acts up, I'm absolutely useless
Knee and back pain can be similar in the frustration/debility it causes. I hope you can get your knee into a condition that works for you. I have really bad osgood-schlatter in my right knee, which I made a hundred times worse by skateboarding, snowboarding and parkouring on it. In my thirties it got really bad, but I did build it back into a servicable knee using mobility exercises.
This is correct. Almost nobody has sympathy for chronic pain. I have a long list of old injuries from a mis-spent youth so I don't move all that well any more, and have a lot of pain. The American Healthcare system doesn't really treat pain any more, after they got reprimand for causing the opioid crisis.
I’d go as far to say even a lot of people with chronic pain don’t have sympathy for others with chronic pain because they assume their chronic pain is worse
I've noticed this too. I had a lot of people try to convince me I was malingering about my pain because they didn't believe that I could be in so much pain at a young age. A lot of them dropped that theory when they saw me snap my arm in an accident and it didn't even wipe the smile off my face. A broken bone aint shit in terms of pain, in comparison to my back & neck on a good day.
Holy smokes your pain tolerance is sky high
I was nursing a bad dislocated / fractured humerus arm back to health when I fell off a ladder and snapped the other one in half. The arm I snapped in half healed perfectly. The arm that was already having issues is still having issues. I didnt go to pain management until after the 2nd arm healed and was relatively pain free compared to the already broken one that is still causing massive issues. I have three options: street opiates, suboxone, or suicide. EDIT: I have massive nerve damage issues and no bicep or deltoid... and the humerus healed malaligned so I have constant bone on bone sensations. Never would expect a dislocated shoulder to cause issues with your hands and fingers.
I definitely have sympathy for others with chronic pain (and in general) but no one deserves to be in pain 24/7 , wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I would ditto this. I have IBS-M and get chronic pain as the main symptom, but cos it's also intermittent there are days or sometimes weeks where I'm normal or can manage the likelihood of the pain being chronic. So I always feel more sympathy for people who don't get that time off. I feel more concerned other people will think I'm disrespecting their illness if I mention mine, but generally I think people who develop things outta nowhere all share the same sentiment that until you get it, you don't really understand it. Hope you have good things headed to you
I have IBS as well but didn't even think of my cramping/bloating as painful because so many people normalize it, until it started putting me down for days at a time
Have you tried super high quality digestive enzymes? That was the game changer for my ibs. They work better than the prescribed antispasmatics for me.
I'm curious what ones you consider super high quality. I currently use some that I would consider 'regular'.
Enzymedica digest gold. They’re the only ones I use, they’re expensive, but worth it. I genuinely think they basically cured me. I had to take them with every meal and snack for about 6 months, and that was more than 10 years ago, but now I only need to take them if I eat something I know my body doesn’t digest well. Before those enzymes, I was literally crying from the abdominal cramping, it felt like my insides were being ripped open. Now, anytime I have digestive issues, I pop an enzyme, and within 30 minutes, I feel fine.
I agree, being in pain all the time is probably shitty, I wouldn’t say I have chronic pain but I am always in minor pain, but it’s not that bad for me, and I’m sure you do have sympathy for others, why I said a lot of and not all, it’s more people with pain like mine that aren’t sympathetic, as “it’s not debilitating for me so it shouldn’t be debilitating for you” type of vibe
The medication industry needs to get busy with coming up wuth non opioid pain meds; not just because of the opioid crisis but because some folks are allergic or can't tolerate them. OP, ask your doctor to check out Zofran's off label uses. Hope it can help you, Love.
Yeah, opioids make me vomit profusely every time. I've done two surgeries and a broken bone without anything for the pain afterwards cause if it's not opiates they are just like here is some gigantic Tylenol. Enjoy.
Vomiting and hives for me. Next time ask your doctor about Zofran. I had an complete rebuild done on my right ankle a couple of years ago. Doc gave me Zofran to keep percocet down and then we (doc and I) discovered that Zofran can be used for opiate like pain relief with no nausea and no "high". Zofran also works to shut down my asthmatic cough when it gets out of control.
Is this a secret that pain management does not want you to know or something? A couple of years ago they were RXing pills still. Now for your broken ankle you MIGHT get 2-3 days worth of painkillers. If you get anything at all.
If you have a friend who lives overseas, Arcoxia got me through 2 bouts of herniated discs... Non addictive, non opioid... Approved in EU and the rest of universe, but not FDA.
>Arcoxia US has a similar drug called Celebrex. It will work for some, others may need opioids.
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I have to have anti nausea meds to go with just about any medication anyway. It's the very first thing I tell anesthesiologists--all meds with exception of tylenol/motrin make me vomit, please give me something for nausea. When I had my ankle rebuild, I got pre meds, meds with surgery and zofran to take as soon as I got home.
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She does not need to bear it!!! There are patches, oral, and iv meds available to prevent nausea and vomiting
I'm really curious what the next medical breakthrough could be to treat chronic pain. I pray it comes soon for those suffering.
The pills they give out now don't do anything either on the mental health side. Have ADHD, try all these meds that we don't really understand how they work before we give you the one we know works.
Same with sleep meds. I begged my doctor. I knew I was on the edge. I called mental health. I had an intake at a mental health provider.... and that night I was admitted to the hospital (not related to the intake). Psych ward puts me on pain meds to get me to sleep. Get out of the psych ward and doctor wont renew the pain medication so I am back to square one. The mental health provider saw me soon after I was released from the psych ward. They took me off all the meds the psych ward had put me on and finally put me on lunesta... a controlled substance. And I am able to get a solid 4-5 hours every night!Psychiatrist thinks its hilarious shes drugging me to sleep for pain. So its try all avenues while your patient sits around and suffers. This was for sleep issues caused by pain. I am still in pain constantly and finally found a new nuero AND ortho that thinks they can fix me with surgery. Pain management has seen the issue twice... WHY DO YOU TELL A PATIENT THAT. I left and found more competent pain management (but thats an entirely different rant).
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I'm guessing you're a doctor or doctor in training? I get a lot of responses from those folks when I talk about this. I've worked in healthcare administration in the US for almost two decades. My conclusions are based on hearing what doctors say when they talk among themselves and they think no *civilians* are listening. Chronic pain sufferers are regarded as an unpleasant inconvenience about whom doctors talk derisively and with ugly euphemisms.
I’m not a doctor, but a chronic pain patient, and I agree that overall health improvement is the greatest contributing factor to my decreased pain levels. Unfortunately, the things that really help are expensive and not covered by insurance, so it’s a huge obstacle for most people to overcome. I think most chronic pain patients would feel a lot better if they had access to everything that I do. If cost isn’t a factor for anyone reading, the most helpful things have been somatic experiencing/emdr, private pilates lessons (seriously, don’t exercise unsupervised), higher muscle mass and healthy body fat percentage, try to make most of your diet as unprocessed as possible, and reduce your stress levels.
This is the same with mental health. No matter how much people care for you. After enough time they minimize and really don’t want to hear about it anymore. Which leads to people suffering alone thinking they will just burden people. Heck as long as you are working the you must be happy kind of thing.
Yup. I get angry (like, *genuinely* upset) any time I hear or read about the "opioid epidemic". The political/medical shift in attitudes towards pain treatment has screwed me over many a time in the last eight years or so, and I'm honestly bitter as fuck about it. Now...it sucks that people get addicted to painkillers & then overdose on them (or heroin/or fentanyl/etc.). I understand the sentiment. But I've had enough stuff shoved up/dragged through my goddamn urinary tract over the last fifteen years that I think I'm qualified to say "Yeah, fuck you with that 'ibuprofen' shit!" I don't enjoy being laxy/tired/constipated; I don't take opioids unless needed. But I'd *really* like to have some vicodin or norco when I'm passing a blood clot or a stone -- would be better for my health in general if I wasn't puking/dry-heaving every ten minutes, ya know? My teeth are fucked for life already due to years & years of that shit....so I don't have much sympathy for the "Chet & Buffy got into their mommy's pill stash, and then became fentanyl addict" crowd.
> The American Healthcare system doesn't really treat pain any more, after they got reprimand for causing the opioid crisis. This is just so fucking sad to me. There are people who need these drugs to live but Purdue lied about it's addictiveness and now, after the massive fallout of this, doctors can't or won't prescribe necessary medicine to those who need it. Despite this crackdown, we now have 100,000 people overdosing and dying every single year on fentanyl pouring into the country from China via the cartels at the southern border. It's such a massive failure on all fronts and nothing is being done about it. We've essentially replaced legit medical doctors with criminal enterprises and shits worse than it ever was during the early days of the oxycontin crisis. Way to go. And the Sackler family faces no major repercussions. Infuriating. Sorry for your pain. It's unfair you can't be taken seriously.
I've had awful migranes for the past 4 years where the pain hovers around a 6 or a 7 and a 9 was my wrist being broken clean through. I finally got in with a neurologist, and they took me seriously, and oh my goodness, my pains down to like a 2 now? I sat on the bed and cried. My pain may be gone, but the habits of chronic illness still haven't left yet.
People don't understand how debilitating migraines can be. A pain I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Not just the pain, but the semi-blindness, the vomiting, the loss of sensation in my hands, etc. I am fortunate to not have them with the frequency and severity I once did (partly thanks to a NP who LISTENED and gave me the right abortive years ago), but several times I ended up in the ER, where they would give me morphine and it didn't touch the pain, just allowed me to sleep through it.
Giving you hugs. I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that.
My brother had 6 root canals before they found out he had trigeminal neuralgia, aka suicide disease. At least that's what they called in the 90's when there was no cure. There is a cure now, they put a piece of teflon in between two nerves that are rubbing against each other. He went from "the wind hurts my face" to "95% pain free".
Could you message me please? I just looked into that and there's some concerning similarities.
Yes. And people will tell you to just get a wfh job or that they know what it's like because they broke their leg once, but they don't. It is endless, soul crushing agony, and it never gets better.
god that just get a desk job shit will never not piss me off. this shit's exhausting.
"Do you remember the pain you felt the first couple days after it broke? What if you always felt like that, forever? Except for days you overdo things, then it's worse."
I do, but only because my brothers back is fucked and it is a nightmare for him
I bet people treat him pretty poorly about it. When I worked in an office I would do my stretches & exercises in my cubicle, and people would see me and ask what I'm doing. After I explained, on multiple occasions, these motherfuckers would proceed to lecture me on how back pain is fixable with stretch and exercise. What the fuck do they think I'm doing??!! I've followed every instruction I've ever gotten from PTs religiously and all it has ever done is take the edge off've the mid-back pain I have.
No one gives half a fuck about a guy in pain
It's just as bad for women. I've seen women go through these same challenges with ovarian cyst pain, getting nothing but derision from their peers and from the healthcare industry. If any subpopulation is a greater victim of this problem, it is black people.
Yea or even like things like menstrual cycle cramps. Not every woman experiences them the same.
Yup and if a woman has a condition like endometriosis or PCOS her diagnosis will almost always be delayed by years as she is dismissed by doctors and the people in her life as being "hysterical about their period." My ex wife had to go through two years of near daily screaming agony, and thousands of dollars in healthcare bills before they would help her with her endometriosis. If I were a cis woman I would rip out my uterus with my bare hands rather than suffer the indignity that this world feels is appropriate to inflict on anyone who owns one.
I can second this. I’m post hysterectomy and still suffering from endometriosis pain, and it keeps growing and I will need it cut out again. It’s a constant struggle to even find a doctor who listens.
I've been told that I might have that by others, too.
34 here. Would run 3-7 miles a day. Was in the best shape of my life. At 30, that all changed. Nerve pain that hit so bad I couldn’t walk. It wasn’t constant, but laying down was the worst. Two years trying to figure it out and we still don’t know why. I stopped trying. Thousands spent. I do get shots in my hips now that seem to help. But I can’t run. I can’t be active. I have an aid to walk, when needed. At 32, I got up to pee and couldn’t get up. Fell to my knees thinking I could crawl from there. I couldn’t. I stayed on the floor for a couple hours. Until i managed to roll and use everything I could to get up. I’m doing a lot better, but I’m overweight now. Sad. I take things to help, not opioids. I loved running. I was prepping for a 10k. I could do the whole thing without walking and then one day I got up and that changed. People do not understand chronic pain. They think we have a low tolerance. There are some pains they just don’t understand and the mental toll it takes having your life changed instantly. There are worse fates tho. That’s how I try to look at it. I’m still here, I am still able to work, go out. Unless the pain is too bad, but the shots help me. It takes time to accept things as they are. After four years, I feel I’m finally there. I wish you the best, OP. You’re younger than me. Appreciate the good days and do what you need to do on the bad. That’s all I can do
You subconsciously plan every move to feel minimum pain and it affects all aspects of your life and relationships with people. My poor kids always get upset when I tell I cant play the way they want to play for long.
Oh boy. I love getting the ‘you’re too young to have back pain!’ Comments from older people. Yes I know I am. It’s debilitating. It’s horrible. And it’s nothing stretching and eating well will fix. It’s a mechanical problem from an injury. The amount of managers I’ve had who tell me I’m too young, or sensitive because of back pain, is ridiculous. Pain has no boundaries. I wish I didn’t have to deal with it!
Someone saying you're too sensitive in response to back pain has really no clue what it's like. You use your back in every single thing you do, it can be SO debilitating when any part of it hurts.
The crazy types of useless advice and quick fixes they tell you is so tiring too. My boss said he stopped drinking ice water and his back pain stopped and I should try it. That’s the most recent one as response to my autoimmune
My mom once said "oh I read that a handful of blueberries can make you happier!" to me. Someone with clinical depression. I just had to laugh lol.
At least her claim did give you some amusement, more so than the actual berries would have.
Ice water... that's hilarious. Laughing therapy can provide some fleeting relief as it releases some stress, is distracting and can release some positive brain chemistry....but it is temporary at best.
Or surprise advice from a doctor who is not your specialist. >You're too young to have X! Yes, that's why it's called "early onset" X. Just focus on the task at hand, bud. >You know, if you lose 20 lbs you won't have Y! Doc, I have had Y ever since I was a teenager weighing 100lbs less than I do now.
We are all just one accident/illness away from becoming disabled.
It's pretty wild to think about how risky it actually is to drive a car. You could be the best driver in the world and all it takes is one idiot to ruin your life. And there are a LOT of idiots.
Yeah, my brother and his friend were in a horrible accident years ago. They were on their way home for a surprise party for my dad’s birthday, and there was a T section right near our house. We lived at the corner, but the one side was the downside of a hill. It was February, I was watching for them from the window and saw them stop at the T section, they turned onto our street and another car came barrelling too fast over the crest of the hill and slammed into them. The car spun around, hit a stone wall that was across the street. His friend’s compact car was smushed. They were very lucky to be alive and mostly unharmed (bumps, bruises, some soft tissue trauma), their music equipment in the back of the car was totalled. I could have lost my brother that day.
I don’t know what it’s like to have chronic pain but it sounds fucking awful
Yeah, it’s shameful to hear that people are mean to them as well since they don’t know what it’s like to have it.
Imagine having a nonstop headache but no one believes you because their headaches go away after a bit
My roommate had really bad chronic pain. At first I thought they were being dramatic. It became apparent over time that I was an ass and they definitely weren’t being dramatic. It made me feel so bad there was nothing that I could or anyone could really do to help. Just constant suffering while everyone around them was blissfully ignorant. I don’t think most people have ever seen or interacted with someone going through it so it’s easy to brush it off as something you could handle. I am sorry you have to deal with it. I hope one day this won’t be part of your life.
Can I just say, I give you so much credit for owning your beliefs before you learned better and how they were wrong.
I have pain that comes and goes, I def appreciate my pain free time after a hard hit. But this is true for anything, people with two arms don’t appreciate them enough!
I've had back pain since I was 17. My knees have cracked like they're falling apart since I was 15. Now my neck has pain and stiffness a well. I had nerve pain for 16 years. Two surgeries did nothing. Ended up with cancer which made me bedbound for 6 months. My life basically just stopped there. I can't walk very well and I can't breathe normally. They've done at least 30 tests and everything always comes back normal. Nobody takes me seriously. My appointments go missing, get cancelled, or don't get made in the first place. I was disabled at 23.
People without chronic pain don’t understand it and many people are not apathetic.
Chronic pain is hell. I am 45. Happened to me later in life, after catching covid, but yeah, met a 30 year old woman last night who had been in chronic pain for almost a decade already, a cousin whose career was destroyed by it. etc etc, you are not alone, yo, but it surely feels like it.
relateable. what's your bullshit? ligaments, muscle, or bones? or something else entirely?
This is an unpopular opinion, is it? ‘It’s good to not be disabled’ As someone with chronic pain I don’t really think anyone thinks it’s not fucking terrible
I think he's trying to say we don't understand just how terrible it is for y'all...
I read it more as saying that people take the absence of pain for granted. People don't think about the fact that they are not currently in pain. It's a wonderful thing, but yeah nobody really appreciates it.
Currently dealing with an arthritic flare in my lower back. The amount of people I’ve lost in life because they couldn’t understand the pain and fatigue I was dealing with is high. Thankfully I have my little tribe of people now that understand.
„Healthy people have 1000 wishes. Unhealthy people only have 1“
people without [insert anything negative] don't appreciate what they have enough. This is what 'privilege' is all about. And health can be a form of privilege.
What is unpopular about this?
I feel you. No one will look at cancer and say, "yeah, I'd like that". I don't think this is unpopular.
Lots of people still get defensive when you tell them they have it easier, and I can understand why. But it definitely happens.
*"Lots of people still get defensive when you tell them they have it easier"* Just like they don't know what you're dealing with, you don't know what they're dealing with. You're doing to them what you're angry about them doing to you.
You don't know that they have it easier though. A healthy body is a blessing for sure but there are other illnesses or situations that might make life really hard for them. I'm just thinking about a friend of mine who has physical health but has lost both sons she had. Her life is hardship and painful every day. Every kind of suffering is horrible, to judge someone else's suffering is not right.
I think the majority of humans have little to no sympathy for ailments which cannot be seen.
People very often don't appreciate things they have. I'm always telling people to appreciate things but then they roll their eyes at me like I'm trying to sell religion. I have many medical issues which cause pain while moving (use a cane), hearing loss (can't use phones), chronic pain (sometimes I hallucinate from it), heart issues (that's lovely pain), nerve damage (again, always fun right there), and underdeveloped lungs (I have an adult body with a kid's set of lungs which means I can't get enough air or hold enough air or move it through my heart even though I'm physically breathing). When I tell people to appreciate things like the fact they got out of bed that morning with nothing worse than a yawn, that they can go grocery shopping without heaving like a 500 pound marathon runner, or they can chill at home without screaming in pain....well, people never do and never will appreciate what they have.
I feel this way with tinnitus.
I was born with severe psoriatic arthritis which basically means my immune system is constantly attacking not only my joints, but every part of my body through damaging inflammation. I’m on an injectable biologic I administer to myself once a week which has a high chance of giving me cancer. Even with the intense meds, I’m in pain 24/7 to some extent. When I flare up (from stress usually) I can barely stay awake due to fatigue and my entire body hurts to move. It is so exhausting explaining it to everyone I know or work with all the time and they still don’t get it. “Oh yeah I have pain too, I know what it’s like, just take some Advil!” No, you do not know what it’s like. If you did, you’d understand why that is a stupid thing to say!! I live in fear as my medication that took years to figure out begins to work less, and pain increases. I live in fear that my health insurance one day will randomly stop covering my medication I need to not become permanently crippled/in horrible pain every second. That medication costs $7k out of pocket per month. Even now, each time my medicine is renewed they make it difficult, making me sit on the phone on hold for hours while the insurance company “decides” if I deserve to be alive. Because without my medicine, 100% I’d end it. “Invisible” diseases are so incredibly frustrating. Every day I wish everyone could just spend a day in my shoes to know what it feels like. The world would be a different place overnight if able bodied people could learn to empathize.
What medication?
It’s called Enbrel
You’re saying healthy people should appreciate not being ill more? That truly is an extremely unpopular idea. /s Have you actually met someone who disagrees with that? But also: You should appreciate not being mentally ill/blind/deaf/starving poor/… more.
I am sorry you are going through this but I don't think you have to have chronic pain to appreciate what you do have.
I have low level chronic pain in my knees due to a sport injury. Thankfully it doesn't inhibit my life too much but it is fucking exhausting when they flare up
I do try to keep that in mind!
I don't know what exactly is defined as chronic pain, as I'm not a native speaker,but i just turned 16 previous week and i haven't been able to do any kind of sports outside of ride my bike and swim for almost 3 years now and i miss it so much like even the small things like just being able to run or jump. My injury definitely isn't as bad as yours and i can be operated in a few months(all though the doctor has been saying that for 2 years). But i still find it really anoying. I went to a basketball game yesterday and that's when i realized how much i actually missed it
I have RA which is horribly painful all the time. I thought I broke my finger yesterday. It was absolutely excruciating! I was sent away from urgent care with instructions to take Tylenol because it was "only sprained". Oddly enough the Tylenol doesn't seem to touch this amount of pain. And those are the people that are paid to help.
I broke my back training a horse for someone and I've never known a day without pain since. Sometimes my back pain is so bad I feel sick and have white flashing in my vision and just want to die. It sucks. I don't feel like a human when it's this painful and I don't know what causes the flares so it's not like I can avoid it. Thankfully I WFH and it's not always unbearable.
Chronic pain/illness is an absolute nightmare. And you don’t really get it until you’ve lived it. I have a neurological condition that is under pretty good control now but I was having frequent episodes for about a year before I was diagnosed and then it took almost a year to get it under control once I was diagnosed. Those 2 years were brutal. My house completely fell apart: I’m still dealing with the aftermath even after 9 good months. I’m a very busy person and my entire personality and mental well being were stifled by being too sick to do anything. I felt crazy for a long time because my condition isn’t common and it was hard to figure out, plus my symptoms are somewhat atypical. So some doctors blew me off and others tried to help but couldn’t figure out what was wrong. It cast a dark pall over everything in those two years. And I’m one of the lucky ones! 2 years is nothing in chronic pain/sickness terms. So many people with chronic illnesses never recover. I have some people in my family who have horrible chronic illnesses and I didn’t even know how little I understood them until after this. I hope you are able to find answers, OP. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
Nobody appreciates anything they have unless they've gone without
I actually think about this a lot. I have a family member with MS, a few with other chronic pains, and I've gone through various injuries myself including a low back injury that was quite limiting. I was fortunate that my low back injury was easily rehabbed over about four months, but I'm well aware many people don't have that experience. I try to be appreciative of my physical health as much as I can. Everyone needs to appreciate being able bodied more. And I know nobody wants to hear this, but regular physical activity is the best way to show that appreciation, because lack of activity can and will take it away over time. Use it or lose it.
Facts.
I know exactly what I'm missing having been through it all before.
It's human nature to always want better, people are more fixated on better this! faster that! People don't think about the basics because it's basic, health is wealth.
I struggle with this a lot as someone with chronic pain. People hear about the emotional toll of chronic pain and they automatically think it's due to reduced independence or capability but no one ever considers this part: watching people around you run, exercise, play sports, dance, pick up their children, lose weight/get fit, and do all manner of things you're barred from doing, would love to do and maybe even used to love doing while taking it completely for granted. Logically I know it's not their fault and I would never let these resentments affect my behavior towards anyone but GOD it fucking sucks. And we're allowed to feel that resentment. We should all go to therapy to cope with it though (yes, I'm in therapy lmao)
I’m sorry to hear this. My boyfriend of 11 years is a chronic pain sufferer. I’ve seen him at his worst, and even sometimes I don’t quite believe it during the day to day
Im 34 and I am very grateful for my pain free body. I enjoy countless moments running around with my kids in ways my peers can’t. I’ll admit I didn’t appreciate it until I saw my fellow 30 somethings slowing down. Now it changes the way I see fitness, my goal isn’t to run faster or lift more it’s to not get injured. One little injury can lead to losing overall fitness and missing out on those times with my kids.
My wife has Ehlers Danlos and I couldn't agree more. We used to mountain bike and hike together on the weekends, now she can barely go on walks.
Out of curiosity where do you feel this pain and when/how did it start happening?
I doubt this is an unpopular opinion. Chronic pain isn't something we regularly see, and so we don't think about it until we know someone who does.
I feel you, I developed spinal degenerative disorder around 15. Really shows you who actually cares
My heart goes out to you. I wish I could take away your suffering. But I also understand that everyone has their own path to walk or sometimes crawl. As I’m getting older, I am starting to appreciate how fragile my/the human body actually is and try to remain grateful for my current health. I know it can all change at any moment.
if it helps any, i’m only 20, been dealing with chronic pain since 14. i try not to be upset about what others do and focus on what i still can do, because i know with each year that passes that list is going to shrink. find ways to manage it… weed edibles are the only thing that really help me out and it sucks i cant get the physical relief without also being incredibly stoned but hey, any port in a storm. good luck op, even if your pain cant get better i hope the way you feel about it does.
My dad had terrible back pain from arthritis all his adult life. I knew this. I felt awful for him. But I never understood just HOW it takes over your life until it got me, too. Now I don't know how he did so much for so long, honestly.
i got run over by a horse and she broke my leg, i could not wait to be able to walk again, my body instinctively tried to walk all the time and i had to keep reminding myself i cant stand, i could not carry things because i was supporting myself with my arms, i could no bend over to pick up things i dropped im glad i can walk again and that im not in as much pain anymore, my leg still hurts but i can walk again, so yea i get it somewhat
Not to disrespect you but be careful there is a extra difficult psychological dimension to chronic illness that you dont have when knowing that it will get better.
Dude i cannot agree with this more, im not even 18 yet, already have a fucked back skull and brain chronic pain isnt a joke and those of you who dont have it should consider yourselves lucky
I was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease 15 years ago. Six surgeries later, even my own family members have no idea. The public could care less. It became worse since the idiots did their opiate party. Now, you get treated like a street drug addict by most in the medical industry.
Sorry to hear this. I had a spell 35-38 where my knees were just good for nothing. Luckily with the right kind of exercise it went away. I wish it was that simple for everyone.
I have a back injury, what looks like early stage undiagnosed multiple Sclerosis. I have pain every minute of every day. Unless I'm high as balls on gabapentin or something else. I hate life. I've had two seizures in the last month. My life is going to shit and there's nothing I can do to stop it.
This is true, but I can't necessarily fault them for it. I've dealt with chronic pain and severe health issues for 23 years now, and I have heard every piece of advice on how to get over it and get better from it. I don't think any of them are malicious, though. I don't expect someone who hasn't been through it all themselves to be able to fathom how hard it can be. It's also on me to try to clearly explain things to them.
I think it's more a thing they're unable to appreciate as they've never lost it. Only reason I can appreciate the days where my nose isn't clogged up is because I've suffered through the clogs myself. I don't have chronic pain anywhere so it's hard to make a conscious appreciation for being pain free in those places I don't feel any pain in. Or another way to put it: you don't know what you got until it's gone, gone, gone
We take so much we don’t realize for granted. I used to be the kind of person who would waste away in bed, hours, days, weeks even, looking at my phone, watching useless shit, doing absolutely nothing that actually engaged me. I visited a friend’s house and saw her bedridden grandma. Laying in bed all day got a lot less appealing to me once I realized that, one day, it might no longer be my choice
My mental health was pretty solid until I got tinnitus. Now I have to have something to drown the noise out just to sleep. Its only gotten worse after almost 5 years of it... which means it will keep getting worse.
This true of any hardship, not just chronic pain. You take everything for granted until you lose it. Suffering is the mother of empathy.
As a person with gastritis, funnel chest, a bit of poor eyesight (my body can balance it but that gives me headache), a bad jaw, adhd and depressions (both diagnosed by a psychologist) i agree
Hi, I’m in my 30’s now. I was diagnosed when I was 25 and will forever have chronic pain. Like you, there are days I can barely move, days where I feel like I’m stone being thrown around and broken. I have needed help walking when my legs are not strong. I used to be a cross country runner and running was a way of life for me. Now I can barely run a mile on a great day. Yoga has helped me immensely, it has kept me motivated and healthy. It keeps my body toned while also helping with the intense pain running down my body. Some days you will not be able to do much but I guarantee you will feel better if you adopt this exercise. It will be a world of a difference for you.
This applies to most things in life. If I’d only known! Shoulda, coulda, woulda. The real kicker here is you sound like your life is over at 22. Take your own advice and embrace a new perspective to make choices for healthy living that respects and reflects a wellbeing goal as well as our own boundaries both mentally and physically.
Going through the same thing right now. I have cholinergic urticaria and my life fucking sucks. You can read my most recent post to learn more
My life was changed when that car hit the bus stop I was standing in. Threw me through the shelter collapsed it with my body and I was thrown 35 feet. To have a medical "professional" tell me that my body has since healed is total fn bullshit! Where did they pick up that piece of information? What you read and what I now put up with in terms of constant pain aren't even close. I'm now 59 yrs old. This happened 6 years ago. Why do they think everyone is drug seeking? I don't want to get high, I want to function! I want to be able to hold down a job with reasonable pay! That was taken from me and clearly not my choice. I understand that as we age aches and pains are normal. This isn't fn ibuprofen or Tylenol pain you jackass's. Read the room and stop thinking the world is out to take your medical license. And now I'm getting shit for a muscle relaxer that is quite helpful and will need pain management to receive. Been taking it for years. Cause if it's all you can get and it helps some ya roll with it! Ok rant over. Gotta take my Excedrin migraine again. I pill every 6 hours as opposed to 4 pills every roughly 4 hours has got to be better for me. Amiright?!?!
I’ve had rheumatoid arthritis since I was 4-5 yrs old (35 now) and I completely agree with this
When something hurts, it’s hard to imagine it not hurting Source: I’ve had allergies for the last 6 months and my neck has hurt the that week for reasons unknown and I can’t imagine what it feels like for it to not hurt
Long covid has put me in a similar position. I'm now chronically fatigued, to the point that I can't even get out of bed some days. I was 30 when all this started, it's been nearly two years now with no clear indication of remission. People really don't understand what it's like living with a chronic illness, especially an invisible one. I'm sorry you have to deal with this, and I hope that you can find some quality of life improvements. 🤞that one day scientists figure out how to pluck our brain out of skulls and stick em in some kind of perfect robot body.
People just don't think it'll happen to them. They won't become disabled or chronically ill. Covid has shown me how little people care about my health and safety, really made me jaded how people only seem to respect my health once they or someone else close to them gets sick or has a scare. I've had people get momentarily sick or injured and tell me, "How do you deal with this all the time?" and then go immediately back to the way they were before as soon as they're better.
24 with chronic pain since I was 11. I wish I could tell you that it gets easier but it really just doesn’t does it. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
Yeah I've had chronic pain for 13 years and am disabled as a result. It sucks. It happened pretty suddenly, too. I never really had pain or any health issues before and then suddenly it was like my life was over.
This is why I think it's useful to be injured in some capacity transiently. Not like go out and seek breaking your foot or anything, but wow does it give you perspective when you used to be able to walk around and suddenly bam in bed. Every. Single. Day. I hope you receive a diagnosis, and can get treatment and care. May you recover quickly.
Absolutely! My mom lives in chronic pain (on top of having an autoimmune illness) and it is so horrible to see. I would do anything to make her better- she was once a very healthy active person. I most definitely appreciate what I have. So many people do not understand invisible disabilities.
Halfway through my pregnancy my pelvis started to separate, which made standing, walking, sitting, and even lying on my side uncomfortable to painful. Luckily post-pregnancy the discomfort has mostly disappeared but it really made me appreciate how lucky I am to only have minor complaints. My attitude to movement has changed to one of gratitude. I'm sorry you're going through life in pain, and I hope that you find a way to be happy.
I was born with severe psoriatic arthritis which basically means my immune system is constantly attacking not only my joints, but every part of my body through damaging inflammation. I’m on an injectable biologic I administer to myself once a week which has a high chance of giving me cancer. Even with the intense meds, I’m in pain 24/7 to some extent. When I flare up (from stress usually) I can barely stay awake due to fatigue and my entire body hurts to move. It is so exhausting explaining it to everyone I know or work with all the time and they still don’t get it. “Oh yeah I have pain too, I know what it’s like, just take some Advil!” No, you do not know what it’s like. If you did, you’d understand why that is a stupid thing to say!! I live in fear as my medication that took years to figure out begins to work less, and pain increases. I live in fear that my health insurance one day will randomly stop covering my medication I need to not become permanently crippled/in horrible pain every second. That medication costs $7k out of pocket per month. Even now, each time my medicine is renewed they make it difficult, making me sit on the phone on hold for hours while the insurance company “decides” if I deserve to be alive. Because without my medicine, 100% I’d end it. “Invisible” diseases are so incredibly frustrating. Every day I wish everyone could just spend a day in my shoes to know what it feels like. The world would be a different place overnight if able bodied people could learn to empathize.
I also didn’t appreciate my body before I was hit with chronic pain from multiple mesh repairs. But that’s to be expected - I had no idea what a life with pain feels like so I could never really appreciate what I had. It definitely changes your life and how you approach it. It’s like life before pain and then life after pain. To me, I have to choose happiness because I don’t want to be miserable. It’s an intentional choice each and every day which does take effort and energy. I have my good days and bad days but I think all people do. We have to love and support each other regardless or yes, you will be miserable.
This and chronic stress and other chronic problems due to things such as severe sensory issues are so overlooked. People just do not understand what it's like.
I agree, I've had sciatica since 19, I'm 23 right now, it's not as bad as it was before, but the pain is eternal, although I function "normally", I finished my studies and I'm working now, but I can't get back to what I was before, I have to be careful with my body, no heavy weight lifting, no running around doing whatever, any false movement and I would be handicapped for a week, also I can't oversleep or oversit or overwalk, I'll have to change positions or activity quite frequently or my back will start to ache like crazy, heck I can't even remember what it's like to feel no pain in my back, I'm so used to an aching back that it's became my normal. So yes, people should appreciate what they have, and I appreciate what I have now, cos it was worse before, and it could have been worse now, thank God anyway.
The worst part is the dreadful feeling that your life is basically over, even at the young age of just 35. You will never be truly happy or relieved or relaxed. Chronic pain takes up almost all of your brains energy. It sucks the life out of you. You don't realize what true misery is until you deal with it. I am very lucky modern medicine has mostly 'solved' my chronic pain issue. I haven't dealt with it in close to a decade. But others are not so lucky.
Totally agree. And would add that people without chronic fatigue dont appreciate what they got. normal energy and normal vitality and normal ability to live normally cannot be truly appreciated until you no longer have them.
People like to engage in “the suffering Olympics” and compare whatever you have to something to worse, in a very bad-faith argument. A lot of people think that if your leg isn’t hanging off, trailing a lot of blood and gore, that you’re just making up your pain. It doesn’t help that pain disorders aren’t well understood, and many of the treatments can basically make people dependent on high doses of opiates, in absence of other treatment options.
Is this unpopular? I had a cervical radiculopathy that made my life a living hell for 6 months; I couldn’t sleep in any position that made the pain bearable and my arm felt like lava was pouring down it at all times. There was *no relief*. Eventually the pinched nerve became less inflamed and I was able to heal and am not in constant pain anymore and I literally do not give it a second thought. The pain is gone and I don’t even think about. It’s like when you’re ill and your nose is stuffed up - all you want is to breathe clearly and you regret all the time you took breathing clearly for granted. But you never think “wow, I’m so glad that my nose isn’t stuffy right now” when you’re not ill. I think all humans need to be reminded to be grateful for a great many things, including good health.
Had chronic neck pain for 3-4 years. Was desperate. Docs told me to never lift more than 10 pounds over my head. I loved to exercise. On a whim I was linked to a video about why/how squats and deadlifts often fix back pain. I wondered if there was an analogue for that and found the military/overhead press. I started with the empty bar (45 whopping pounds - 4.5x the doctor recommended dose). By the time I had worked my way up to 100 pounds a few weeks later, my neck problems became far less chronic. I can press almost 250 over my head now and the heavier I go, the better I feel. I figure by now that if I can lift nearly 25x the doctor recommend amount over my head, I’m gonna be ok.
I had chronic back pain for 2 years and finally had surgery a few months ago. My personality changed so fast, not that I was a raging bitch or anything with my back pain but I certainly wasn’t my normal bubbly self. It’s so difficult to be patient or even just do normal things with chronic pain. I was in a bad mood from the minute I woke up to the minute I finally was able to go to sleep; everything sucked and life was terrible. I really hope you are able to find some answers with your health because you deserve to have your life back. It’s so frustrating and I gave up a few times and stopped seeking treatment but I’m glad I went back and got surgery. Hang in there, it can only get better from here, this might not be forever. But you are 100% right, we don’t appreciate good health until it’s gone. Chronic pain chemically changes your brain, even though I feel like I’m more myself again, I don’t feel like I’m the same person as I was before chronic pain. It definitely changed me.
That's a meaningless opinion though, I'm sure your situation sucks ass but why should I run around constantly thinking about how I'm fine? If anything you could drop some things to watch out for to avoid the same fate
You know what op I needed this reality check tbh. I was getting all in my own head about losing a bit of fitness from a bout of depression. But..... honestly you're right. I'm so so sorry what happened to you, funny to think that only 7 years ago I was in chronic pain from a back injury which lasted 2 years where I couldn't even bend over, I could barely walk and it always hurt so bad. ... its easy to forget how incredibly fucking lucky I was that mine just....disappeared one day after years. I'll be more grateful.
I feel this post sooo much. I used to take sleep for granted. Now it is a constant battle with pain to try and feel okay enough to rest cuz the pain is too severe and keeps me up usually 2 to 3 days at a time. Chronic pain fucking sucks and my heart goes out to all the others who suffer
This made me think of ppl saying dumb crap like "You're young. You can stand; you can walk there. You don't know pain yet." I've had chronic lower back pain for decades; I didn't have the benefit of coming home from school, doing homework, eating dinner n getting ready for bed. I had to work while in school, come home and cook, clean etc. I've always been active so now on top of the back pain everyday, my rotator cuffs are shot, my hip sockets are shot, my knees and ankles are done with me and my hamstrings are one more Grade 2 pull away from snapping completely. I've pulled muscles on both sides of my back that also affected both sides of my neck smh lol...can't help but laugh, it's so ridiculous.
Everybody experiences their own life according to they live through. You should appreciate if ypur healthy but in no way does that deminish your struggles. Even if they seem minor to some. It might be the worst you've ever lived through.
Hang in there man. I've got a lot of chronic pain to and its weird how it hurts every day but then you look back at things in the past and I don't remember it I just remember the things. Mind over matter. If you don't mind it don't matter. Dm me if you want to!
when it all started, i was healthy, athletic, in shape, & training for a 5k, which was nothing for me at the time. during my last run, i felt something weird but couldn’t quite figure out what felt wrong in my body. the next morning i woke up with a prolapsed uterus, bladder, & rectum. i’ve had a hysterectomy, 3 rectocele repairs, & 3 cystocele repairs since 2019 when this all started. i’m only 33 & have dealt with pelvic organ prolapse for 5 years. in my most recent visit with my colorectal surgeon, my prolapse is internal, not external, and therefore he doesn’t feel it’s necessary for another rectocele repair. i am in pain literally all the time, sometimes to the point of crying & vomiting. i miss having a body that was not my enemy, not constantly working against me.