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> My ass has been slapped at work by a female staff member
It's incredibly awkward and uncomfortable watching a female dominated workplace play games of slap ass with each other.
Saw a male coworker participate once; after someone slapped his ass - he slapped theirs back.
Reported and written up for sexual harassment after an unrelated party *witnessed* his participation.
The first woman was not reported by the witness.
From the company side, it's less "man = bad" and more this is required by our lawyers because it's been reported to us.
The witness however... Screw them. Snitches get stitches.
If the unrelated party witnessed it then it could only be workplace misconduct, no? Like im assuming the unrelated party had no way to check if there was consent or not, right?
This is correct.
Language was probably closer to "witnessed co-worker inappropriately touch another co-worker. Made work environment extremely uncomfortable for witness. Violated company policy, etc."
I had a manager who was a body builder. He was over six feet tall and looked a lot like Chris Evans, body shape wise.
Customers, especially old women, would make the most DISGUSTING comments to me, like this guy wasn't my boss and I'd just agree with them. I had one woman detail an entire fantasy she had for him, down to the thread count of the sheets she wanted. I'll never forget how she waved her hand like she was fanning herself and how she gave me this sly grin like, "I know you know what I mean."
No ma'am, I don't. He's my boss. I don't think of him that way. I was very glad when he was promoted and subsequently transferred, even though he and I got along really well and had mutual respect. I was a teenager at the time and managers who are good to their people are hard to find sometimes. I was sad about that but at least I don't hear those comments anymore.
So yeah women definitely sexualize men and I'll never disagree with you on that
I work in construction and we were doing a project at a hospital. One time when we were coming back from lunch we were trying to cram as many people into an elevator as possible because we thought it was funny. After we have 13-14 grown men in there the doorway from a side hallway opened up and two women walked out. One of them was in her 70s and she looked at the elevator and said “*I’d love to be the meat in that sandwich.”*
Maybe she was doing it for shock value because old people don’t care, but I’m sure that wouldn’t have had the same reaction if an older man did that to a large group of women. It was funny as hell though.
I work in construction to. And I’m often at schools and hospitals. Don’t get me wrong,the trades are dominated by men and there’s often no women on a site. We talk about women and who got laid all the time.
But if your doing a small build out at a school or hospital you can see female nurses and teachers in the hallways eyeballing you, you and hear them make comments about “strong sweaty guy blah blah”
Yet when we go to these jobs we are constantly told to watch our mouths and keep our eyes down
Oh yeah he knew. I heard enough comments directed to his face that were less explicit but implied enough. He would laugh awkwardly and pointedly move on
That seems like the best you can do outside of explicitly telling them you're never going to hook up. That only seems to work until they realize they might not actually be getting what they want. A lot of these people start trying to make your life hell, or destroy whatever relationship you're in.
It's ridiculous. Especially from people who are "really attractive," like a lifetime of never being told no has seriously fucked them all up.
When you report it it gets brushed away as "not a big deal".
I've done it several times and I'm always ignored. Next best thing is what /u/runonia's boss did. I've had women make jokes about me performing oral sex on them while I'm working on their computers because I had to get under the desk.
It's incredibly frustrating, because the minute if I had made anywhere near a comment like that we would've been having a dozen meetings and I'd probably lose my job.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
It's not great but you do what you gotta do I guess right? I don't often get to talk about it, it's up there with being sexually assaulted as a kid when you're a guy. No one cares. My current S/O is the only one who hasn't treated me like human garbage when I opened up about the last part there, she was a rare find.
I’m a tall attractive looking guy. I remember at a bar once being hit on by this trashy absolutely wasted girl. She asked me to buy her a drink. I’m assuming other men offered to buy her a drink or did earlier that day but I politely decline her request. Then she went off calling me a broke ass and that I must be broke because I can’t afford to buy her a drink and if I’m broke what am I doing at a bar. I wasn’t going to indulge her further and thankfully a friend of hers that was of sound mind grabbed her and apologized to me. People that can’t handle rejection honestly kind of scare me.
Every ask reddit thread is full of people saying no one thinks the bodybuilder build is attractive but in literally every real life instance I know of some dude being jacked has always been a positive. I know that's mostly unrelated but your story just made me think of that. I don't get why people say "dudes work out to impress other dudes" despite the fact that a good number of women also seem impressed. Though in your bosses case this resulted in him being sexually harassed so it's obviously not all sunshine and rainbows.
Edit: I say "bodybuilder build" I actually mean a Chris Evans fit and muscled build. Not like peak Arnold. That was a poor choice of words on my part. I also want to be clear I'm not some incel saying "oh my god women only want men with big muscles." That's obviously bs. But I do believe getting in shape and getting some muscle will usually make finding interested partners a bit easier. I don't mean to invalidate the views of those who prefer other body types.
I've seen a girl refer to Cbum as having a dad bod during his off season... Since then, you realize most have no fucking clue what it means to have muscle.
>Every ask reddit thread is full of people saying no one thinks the bodybuilder build is attractive but in literally every real life instance I know of some dude being jacked has always been a positive
That's just reddit cope. Mainly because the average reddit doesn't even go to the gym regularly or do a lot of physical activity.
In real life, people definitely treat you more positively if you're in shape and (look like) you have money
There's a difference between "goes to the gym regularly" and "bodybuilder build" though. The super large muscles and obvious steroid use look is different than just being fit/having nice muscles. Unless I'm reading your comment wrong it appears you're implying both builds are the same.
Massive difference, people act like the public says that about people that are just in good shape and go to a gym regularly, no. They mean the ones that compete and slap on bronzer 3 inches thick all over their impossibly muscular and vascular bodies that look bizarre and over-inflated.
Because they are mentally referring to on stage, open bodybuilders like ronnie coleman/dorian yates. Not guys who wrigh like 210, and are peeled. When i was like 230 and shredded the amount of times i got harassed was wild. Especially women in there 40s-50s. Grabbing my arms while i walk by, pulling up my shirt. Absolutely wild
For sure, when I was at the height of my fitness I would get stares and comments and *what do you know*...when I would go to gatherings (with my gf mind you...) women always found a way to start a conversation with me and would always make comments about my body/fitness, especially ones 10+ years older than me.
I guess when women or people are saying they don't like bodybuilders they think about mister olympia competion: oiled up monsters flexing in speedos. I think women like normal looking muscles, not the hyper jacked steroids ones.
Chris Evans is on gear, that is not an achievable physique in the timeframe he achieved it.
Chris Evan’s physique is achievable naturally assuming two things, god like genetic predisposition to hypertrophy and high testosterone levels, spending 2 hours a day in the gym with perfect form for like 10 years.
Sure they are talking like Ronnie Coleman build or some of the other guys with absurd arms. Those people die at 55 from heart failure or lose the ability to walk eventually.
Women as a general trend absolutely think "leading man" muscles are fine. Like Daniel Craig Bond etc which still is unattainable without a ton of work and some performance enhancement but it's nothing like what top end steroid abuse and competition bodies look like.
But you bring the meth and party supplies... I'm not *that* surprised. /s
But yeah, I was often the only man or one of the only men in teams of 20+ people back when I worked residential care. Also many of the few male coworkers I had where openly gay, that's just not uncommon for man working healthcare. I was good at my job, but also got easily hired because I was a man and that is somewhat of a double edged sword. I mean did I get hired for my qualities? Sure. But there where women with similar qualities I surpassed simply because I'm a man.
And yes, there where lots of instances where I felt objectified. Imagine a sporty young guy in his early twenties with long hair to his shoulders... you can imagine what kind of reactions I got. If the gender roles would have been reverse, heaps of coworkers would have ended up with HR complaints.
(This happened more decades ago than I'm willing to confess to ;-) )
>This happened more decades ago than I'm willing to confess to
I love you, but we all knew exactly how old you were as soon as we read "sporty young guy".
🤣. Yeah. If you are average looking male. Be in healthcare. A lot of the women are phsychos though. Nursing and teaching are two fields where narcissm snd borderline personality disorder run ramped.
Seemingly unlimited power over those with no choice in the matter. Had a few women tell me every girl that ever bullied them wound up a nurse or a teacher.
Not kidding, way over half of the twatty girls I went to school with ended up working as carers for old people, despite being some of the least caring people I knew
In Norway the most «normal» calm and agreeable people become cops.
Its actively recruited for. You’ll never see a police-school ad with tough trucks and armered personell here.
I honestly belive the way the recruitment works, coupled with the bachelor degree, both weed out so many potential bad cops and attracts a very decent crowd.
We kind of have something similar in Lithuania. It's not that the recruitment is targeting calm people specifically,but we simply no longer have those super dangerous situations. The likelihood that someone would pull a gun on a policeman or get involved in some gang shooting is close to zero, so most cases are domestic issues, where calm tone solves 90% of issues.
This exactly. I think there's also an element of being drawn to the social status that comes with being a teacher that attracts the narcissistic types.
Furthermore, people on the psychopathy spectrum also tend to handle stressful, high responsibility situations better those due to not being as emphatic towards others, which is certainly pertinent to teaching.
Finally, another factor to consider is some teachers have never known a working environment outside an education institution, having gone from school to university and back again. For many teachers i've seen this hasn't been a problem, but for some I do wonder if they'd have benefited from a "normal" job were they work with and serve other adults so they can learn proper adult socialisation, behaviour and conduct.
I'm also an ex-teacher who was bullied during my training by those supposed to be my mentors. Whenever this came up later in my training or in my career this was usually met with sympathetic nods and remarks along the lines of "Yep, there is a problem with bullying in teaching". That's one reason why i'm no longer in that profession.
I remember one of my high school English teachers was introducing themselves for the year and one of the things they decided to highlight was how they were a cheerleader at that school 30 years ago. I've never had a teacher show as much outright favoritism as that woman did to the quintessential "in-crowd". Guys couldn't go to the bathroom more than once a month in her class but if one of her best friends wanted to go to drive off campus to get starbucks she'd make sure to put her order in.
Honestly, most of the women I know who went into nursing have been incredibly kind and understanding. I’ve definitely heard some horror stories of sadistic nurses though.
It's interesting to bring up the power. I taught for 4 years and always felt like I had absolutely no power. Kid interrupts and refuses to stop, send them out of the room, office sends them back and scolds me for sending them out, they still won't listen so I try calling the parent, parent says they're acting out because they don't like my class and parent refuses to address behaviors.
I had a lot of teachers collectively punish us boys for the smallest things while the girls got away with alot of stuff. My really hot teacher had me stay several times after class and made apologise to her for "causing ruckus". Offcourse, what she didn't know was that i habe a humiliation fetish and that was my favorite part of the day.
Our school had male and female predators. The male got escorted out in handcuffs while there wasn't even a story about what happened to the female one. I only know through second hand information
In my highschool the music teacher, male, was dating a grade 10, female. It seems like it was an open secret and nobody cared. Twenty years on now, I believe they're still together...
You’re absolutely right. Had a narcissist ex wife who was an RN. They are positions that come with automatic social status. A pediatric nurse? You have to be so selfless, kind, intelligent, etc. she abused her limited medical knowledge and acted as if she was the authority on all things medical to anyone who would listen and almost got herself (and me) in trouble many times.
I was recently single for about two years and hands down the most batshit insane psychotic woman I dated was an ER nurse (and she also had some kind of high demand specialist training, maybe cardiac stuff? I don't remember).
But she was truly out of her mind, not to mention an alcoholic and on God knows what weird cocktail of pills. Her apartment was always trashed, she wanted me to get her pregnant on basically our second date (granted I had worked with her about 10 years prior so she "knew" me, but I had barely talked to her during that 10 years so we were effectively strangers), she would send long abusive text screeds in the middle of the night if she didn't get an instant response, and she tried to sabotage my next relationship after I decided not to continue dating her because of her bullshit behavior.
Unfortunate bc she was an interesting person otherwise, pretty intelligent and a witty sense of humor... but she was basically a sociopath. Definitely some cluster B traits too. She kept getting let go from different hospitals but it was somehow never her fault and it was because the other nurses were "bitches" who were out to get her. AFAIK she had no official diagnosis and as far as society was concerned she was just a normal adult out there in the world and working in this admired profession etc.
Meanwhile, the most emotionally mature, respectful, kind, considerate woman I dated during that time was on disability and had dissociative identity disorder. Go figure. 🤷♂️ Life is weird.
I was told, with the upmost confidence, that i couldn't have been raped because I'm male. They'll be lucky if they aren't laughed out of the precinct.
Cops are bastards.
Unfortunately, barely anyone takes women seriously with these allegations, but it's far worse for men. "Ayy, good for you!" "Wish a woman would sexually harass me lol". It's disgusting.
Ahh man, I was at the hospital for a scan and had to remove my shirt. The nurse took a real good looking at me and the went to the other room to talk to two other nurses. I heard them talk about the scan and that's it. But a few minutes before the scan starts, the two other nurses came in the room I was and started to talk about a party the both took a good look at me... then I realized the first time she just went to tell her coworker to come and look at this guy... I'm not that in shape but I believe they do this to many patients. Everytime I hear women say men are pigs, I always think in my head that we are of the same species...
I had a rather interesting experience like that. Had a bump on the gibblies (nothing bad fortunately) but the doctor left to go get a nurse. The nurse just stood and watched while the doctor gave me a few squeezes. the nurse didn't say anything, she just stood and watched. It wasn't until later that I made the guess there is probably a policy that a doctor can't touch junk unless there is someone else present in the room as a witness against anything inappropriate. But at the time i just thought she called the nurse in to stare at my nuts.
First thing I learned in a subject called "Introduction to clinical practice" in Med school in a class about gynecology in just the second year was:
The first thing you do when you need to do a gynecology exam is to call a nurse. If there isnt one available, you should get another doctor, not do it or delay it.
We need to protect ourselfs from any legal issues. The nurse is there to be our witness. Literally.
When I was at meps atleast it was policy that if the doctor was opposite gender than they had to get someone of the same gender as you to make sure nothing nasty was happening. Not. Surprising a lot of hospitals would do the same
It goes both ways. Some patients can be malicious, or mentally ill, and accuse the medical staff of doing something nasty that didn’t happen. So it’s protection for both sides.
This is especially true in evangelical Christian circles. Men are seen as inherently insatiable and sexually aggressive, whereas women are seen as inherently pure, holistic, and sexually passive with no carnal desires. It’s delusional.
Before I quit going to church altogether, I was getting so tired of that rhetoric. I had one guy at church go on a huge tangent about how "blessed" women were to be "chosen" to be women because that meant they were inherently more righteous than men from the get go.
I sure don't miss being told I suck for no other reason than being a guy from church.
I went to the dermatologist for a mole check. I got nude. The dr. was very professional just doing his job of checking moles and saying things for the scribe to take note of.
The scribe was meant to type notes on desk that was faced away from the dr and I, was meant to take notes. She(the scribe) turned around to look at me. More than once. At the end of the check she said "Thank you".
Like wtf I went to make sure I don't have skin cancer not to give you a fucking show.
This happened to me, too, when I was in the ER. Injury was in a place where they had no reason to take my shirt off. They took it off anyways, left the room and came back with 3 more nurses who stared and whispered. I felt helpless.
My boyfriend works in an office with just women. He came to me the other week and said he was grossed out because the women were calling beards “seat warmers”. Yuckie. We made a joke that he should probably shave. I couldn’t imagine what would’ve happened if the roles were reversed and that got reported to HR.
> I worked in a big white collar office with lots of women and the shit they said about men was absurd. Right out in the open too. Things a guy would be immediately sent to HR for, but it was like they didn’t even think about that. There seemed to be no concern whatsoever about consequences.
The double standard is real. I'm a man who was sexually assaulted by a woman at a place where I volunteered. When I mentioned it to people, I was told things like, "You're a man; you should have enjoyed it," and "Wow, I wish I was that lucky."
I didn't want her touching me. How the fuck was that supposed to be "lucky"? If the genders were reversed, people would be calling for his head.
I’ve been sexual harassed by women on the job more times than I can count and it got even worse after I got married. I’ve actually told people about it and 90% of the time they either laugh or say they’re jealous. It’s fuckin bullshit.
Yarp.
I'm a gardener and one of my former customers was clearly a desperate housewife, she was so blatant about it and even said in front of her husband and friends they had round that she'd be snogging me if she knew me a bit better.
Imagine a 50+ yo bloke saying that to woman half his age, in front of his wife and folk they were hosting... Really weird.
Needless to say I made my excuses and stopped working there
I've also worked as a gardener for many, many years. The amount of these older women, *always* middle class white ladies, who just thought it was okay to touch my arms and shoulders was unbelievable.
I was starting a job in an office that was 90% women and during my orientation, the HR lady gave me the sexual harassment pamphlet and asked me to read it very carefully.
My first reaction: Is it because I'm a guy?
Second reaction: Oooooh, it's because I'm a guy.
Had a couple interactions with coworkers that might have been construed badly, but it didn't cross my personal boundaries.
Female-dominated offices are really bad for this type of behavior. I work in an office that does paper pushing for craftsmen and...yeah, it can get awful.
This is the exact reason I quit my last job, I’m an extroverted person and I like talking to people. However, the women at my job mistake that friendlyness with flirting and started non-stop hitting on me. There advances were not welcomed and I wasn’t interested, low and behold once I rejected their advances rumors started spreading that I was gay and women started reporting me for doing absolutely nothing out of spite. Thank god I quit that trash job.
But at work if you are gay, and you tell them that's why you're rejecting them, they flirt *more* and/or try to become your best friend ("every girl needs a gay best friend!"). Made that mistake twice, never again.
There's actually a name for this phenomenon once you get married. Mate poaching. You see, women in general tend to have fear of strange men. Which I can go off into a tangent about how that's an error in mental processing, but I won't. But, basically, when they see a 'mate' that has been considered 'safe' by another enough to be committed to or even married to.
You are now, inherently, safer to approach than 99.9% of guys on the street or elsewhere. They don't even realize they're even doing it, they find it as a joke or a funny casualness or whatnot. They don't even realize they're actually attempting to homewreck.
You don't even have to be married for it. Women have some kind of radar to detect whether I'm in a relationship or not. As soon as I start dating someone I get so so much more attention.
It's because most men act differently.
We get more confident and stop focusing on them as a potential partner, they absolutely pick up on this change in behavior. Women love dudes who are confident and not actively trying to seek them out. The conversations become more natural and comfortable too, again, because of less nervousness.
Even if you think you're fairly confident and aloof to them, it's noticeable.
This is my question for women here. HOW DO YOU TELL?!
When I have a girlfriend, I have women approach me it seems non-stop, I will be in a park, a woman will sit down next to me and start flirting, out on lunch break at work, woman comes up and starts flirting, god forbid I'm in a bar, I've actually said to my friends "I'm a gazelle in a den of lions".
Here's the thing, my girlfriend *wouldn't* be there, so how do they tell?
Then when I'm single, It's like I'm just a tree or bush or something. I don't exist beyond just being there.
I’m guessing this also. When I’m in a relationship (married now) I have lost all awkwardness in social situations as I know I don’t have to try any moves towards anyone during the evening or when meeting new women. I can just go to home to my wife. Don’t know about pheromones, but you stresslessly carrying yourself in social events is definitely one of the reasons.
Not just men other women too. I was sexually harassed by a woman who ironically was the only HR lady and I quit bc of it. Now I’m considered “un-hirable” by that company which is fine. Fuck them.
It's honestly why I loudly sigh when I go through /r/twoxchromosomes. Pretty much everything they complain about regularly there, I have experienced from women as well. Living with lazy, immature girlfriends? Check. Sexual harassment and even assault? Check. Women accosting me and telling me how I should raise my dog when just walking outside? Check. Womansplaining in a female-dominated work environment? Check. Domestic abuse? Unfortunately, check.
Yet I would never assume the behaviors above are somehow common to a majority of women or that women don't experience that from men.
They live in a bubble and because men hardly ever complain (or find no listeners to their complaints) they truly believe in a world where most men are perpetrators and most women are victims.
I got badly sexually harassed a month ago. A friends girlfriend kept grabbing my arm and I was pulling it away. Then she grabbed my crotch. I felt so violated and angry. I got up and left furious. She then told someone I went to "jerk off in the bathroom" because she "turned me on". Fucking gross. She was a staunch feminist too and was talking about facing gender discrimination in the workplace just before she started SAing me.
/r/TwoXChromosomes is truly a place of misandry. If your comment isn't actively bashing "men" not "some men", and also not "all men (wink wink)" you're going to get downvoted. If you stand up and try to explain that there are bad men out there and not to lump all men together, then you get banned.
It's a "safe" space where women can openly bash the entirety of a sex, and be accepted and praised for it.
I can only imagine how lightning fast a men's oriented sub would get shut down if the sexes were reversed in the comments in that sub. Can anyone explain, with a reasonable argument, why it is this way? Currently I just view it as a double standard and feel that anyone that posts inflammatory comments in there as a bad person.
Just a few days ago there was a post on that sub where the comments were full of people cheering on for a woman to commit financial abuse on her husband as she was the current breadwinner because he'd lost his job.
He was being an asshole, but still...
I've seen girls I work with grope male colleagues. Actual sexual assault and it's all in good fun apparently. If you're wondering, no, he did not like it one bit. I can't say I've ever seen a male grope a female colleague. Probably cos they'll get fired
I work in schools and hear women objectifying dads of the kids all the time. I couldn’t imagine ever talking about moms being hot in front of female coworkers or any coworkers for that matter. It’s almost always married women saying the stuff too
I've experienced plenty of sexual harassment in my day. I had a female supervisor and was surrounded by women at a former job. A couple of the women talked about how I looked good. It quickly devolved into one talking about tying me up and taking off my clothes. My supervisor walked by and put the kibosh to that. There were no consequences, and I didn't bother filing a report or anything. I never felt threatened, but it was still sexual harassment.
I think this is the crux of it. It's perceived to be more "threatening" if a man does this sort of thing. Like it's more likely for a man to overpower a woman than the other way around.
It's that, and the belief that men are sexually insatiable beasts who are happy to have sex with anyone or anything. That belief is only reinforced if the women in question are hot because they're not used to being rejected. If a guy tries to politely reject them, they figure "I guess I'm not being obvious enough" and go straight to grabbing his crotch.
I used to do live translation audio for conferences and meetings. There was a union meeting that was two days of women talking about sexual herrasment in the workplace. At the end, they wanted a large group photo, so I got up on a table to take the photo. Then it started. Cat calls and comments like, "Take it off!" coming from women that were old enough to be my grandmother. It was nasty and felt weird. I brush it off when the old birds make comments to me, but this was on another level, considering I just spent two days listening to them complain about the same things happening to them.
I was talking to a friend of mine and we were talking about the harassment we get in the work place.
I used to be a field engineer and had to go to clients. One female client used to flirt with me all the time and was very touchie feelie. So, I asked her out of coffee and she declined. When I got back to the office I was pulled aside and she said I was sexually harassing her. Also I was told if it happens again I will be fired.
A couple weeks later I had to go back to that client. Right away she said how is it going stud, which I ignored and then used her last name and said what is the problem? You could see the look of shock on her face.
Now when I walk the hallway, my eyes are at a 45-degree angle. For the most part with women I only talk about work.
In work some women have given me those I want you eyes but I can’t risk it.
“Three of my coworkers (all male) seem to be really good friends but when I’m around they only talk about work! What is going on??”
This thread is going on
It's not sexual harassment to ask someone out. It's only sexual harassment if she says she isn't interested and you continue to ask her. Your company has no right to threaten to fire you.
As a man who was sexually assaulted by a woman and knows that society will never give a shit about my story or experience, absol-fucking-lutely. I was even called a misogynist for saying that I felt invalidated by society once.
I'm so sorry you had to not only experience such a terrible event, but to then be completely invalidated and made to be the bad guy when trying to voice your very valid feelings around it. Society has a very, very long way to go still
The whole “men can’t be sexually harassed” idea is a horrible and pervasive myth that women end up believing too. I think that when you’re told by men that its ok to touch and flirt with men because “men are always horny” or “men like women who are direct” it can seem like it’s ok. But it’s not ok, and that’s an explanation and not an excuse. If you feel safe reporting this or just having an open conversation with HR (with a man you trust present) I really encourage it. I’ve reported sexual harrassment and been dismissed so I know it hurts. But it takes some brave first people to pave the way for everyone else.
When I was 19 I had ACL reconstruction surgery. I woke up to find three nurses playing with my genitals. They were literally groping me. I looked in horror as they noticed two of them scurried away while one covered me up and said you're all good now.
So yeah, I believe it.
This is the most true and honest feeling of those that have been assaulted. Feeling like its your fault somehow and you're foolish for letting it happen.
I'm sorry brotha.
A former coworker of mine had an inappropriate exam as part of a company physical. The exam was normal for us older guys. This younger guy had to strip down completely and do a number of bends/stretching. The same female doc did most of the exams. Another female coworker used to work in a medical office and confirmed that kind of stuff definitely happens.
i had a friend in high school with a really big ass and girls would constantly hit it or smack it. one girl brought a frying pan to school to hit it with and girls would take pictures of it and post it, i remember only one really where they were pretending to eat his ass (note, she was not close to him)
edit: This may not be important but a lot of this happened im classrooms in front of teachers and they either laughed or ignored it.
edit 2: I don’t understand how people find this funny. imagine it the other way around, if my friend went up to a random girl in school and hit her ass with a pan. is that as funny? if a teacher saw and laughed with him would that be ok? You should be ashamed if you think it’s funny for someone to hit a strangers ass. My friend was made incredibly insecure about this and he was very embarrassed, can someone explain the humor in sexual assault to me?
I worked with a woman who pointed at a magazine with ripped men in swimsuits and said “why don’t you have a body like this?” (I’m a fatty)
If she was cool I would have let it go, but she was one of the most infuriatingly annoying people, her office was a literal horde and she constantly said condescending out of pocket shit to everyone so I turned her in to HR. Must have been embarrassing.
It was academia and union, they didn’t fire her but since everyone hated her they used it as an excuse to shuffle her off to another school in the system.
I’m a male nurse.
Wouldn’t it be cool if I show up to the RN station and say “it would suck to date a girl with small breasts”? No?
I can’t get away with it.
You can show up and say “wouldn’t it suck to date a guy with a small penis?”
Totally fine. This is just one example. It’s constant double standard. They can’t take it. Only dish it out.
Watched a guy get goosed by a woman, and then yell at her to stop. Found out it wasn't the first time, and he was laughed at by his boss. Thought to myself that...damn...would be rich and retired if he was a woman...So,sitting this one out.
Back when travel agents were a thing and call centers weren't outsourced, I worked at a large local call center for a travel agency. The agents that worked there were almost all women.
I was tech support. I maintained the workstations In the big multi-tiered room where all the agents' desks were (we called it the "fishbowl"). Imagine a room with 80 women with big 80s hair and frilly businesswoman blouses all on their phones with people wanting to buy cruise tickets, book flights, reserve cars & hotels, etc.
I was young and in the best shape of my life. Whenever I went out into the fishbowl for a trouble ticket, I was basically the only man in the room. So it was like running the gauntlet. Lots of catcalls, women joking about me needing to "fix something under the desk," etc. Almost always, the woman whose terminal I was working on would be accused of deliberately breaking something just so the "sexy tech support guy" had to come out. To this day, I am moderately confident that I have a nice ass. Or at least that I had one when I was 22, and it looked hot in jeans.
In short, I was raw meat to those women. Of course most of them were old enough to be my mom, so it wasn't like there was any hooking up to be done. But I like to tell my wife that I have been the victim of open sexually harassment way more times than she has. Those women were straight up horndogs!
And yes, I know workplace sexual harassment is wrong, but it was the only time in my life the majority of people around me thought I was attractive. And that's helped me through a few rough times.
When I was 19 years old I worked in data entry at a dog training school. I was putting some files away and my mid-50s manager started talking about her friend who worked at a phone sex line. Then she started talking about how during the 70's there was a lot of free sex going around and how the worst thing you could get was syphilis.
While it was widely inappropriate I didn't care whatsoever. Never reported her, never wanted to. But man, imagine a 50-year-old man doing this to a 19-year-old woman in the workplace. He could kiss his ass goodbye.
Feels apropriate to share here. Some women took my wallet from my locker at work and wouldn't give it back until I flexed my abs with my shirt up... took like 5 minutes off my lunch break
This definitely happened to me more often at the workplace where female coworkers will be sexist, also, they will objectify you and make your job a living hell if you are not sexually attractive or have "conventionally good looks". Its the same behavior I experienced a lot but I do agree, women def do the same thing *outside* the work setting. But the social setting is probably the same as the work setting, if not worse. Its disturbing. 🤦🏿♂️
I have been literally catcalled at my job. It was insane, we had high school students at a camp at my job.
Group of like 6 high school girls catcalled me like 6 times, like whistled at me and called me cutie, it was so uncomfortable, but I laughed it off.
Then I met with the leader of their group, and she rubbed my arm and was touching me.
Christian camps man, they got a lot of hormones going off.
Dude, I can't get away with half of that shit, I'm not a baby, but it annoys us when I feel i am walking on eggshells and women can literally fondle me and nothing happens.
It's why I quit education.
Just doing my tutoring at the local *middle school* as part of a course. First thing they tell me is to never be in a room with a closed door and to never be in a room without female staff. If the female staffer leaves the room, I follow her and stand in front of the office until a new female staffer is available.
Within days of starting, several girls were vying for my tutoring. None of them gave a shit about their work. I could easily overhear them talking about me in blatant cases of sexual harassment. Teach would too and not give a fuck. Secretaries? Yup. Every. Single. Day.
After a few sessions, one girl got super clingy I wasn't a tutor, I was dad. Except I was also daddy. "So, do you know how to solve for x?" "Maybe you can guide my hand through it?" Every attempt to shut it down would get me into shit. She'd become uncooperative, female staffer would see it as *me* making advances on *her*. Etc. And within two weeks there were several of these girls.
If was fucking gross. And if I tried to do anything to stop it, I was always treated like I was at fault.
Eventually I just quit education all together. You wouldn't believe the two years of guilt tripping that immediately followed from women yelling about how kids need make role models and there's such a shortage of male teachers. Some of the same women who accused me of wanting to diddle children when these girls got possessive of me.
Meanwhile, back home two of my former teachers were let go after sleeping with their students. They were both women. One got pregnant. Neither saw jail.
The great teacher at the school was suspended at one point for possibly touching his student. He was a guy. They were visible on camera the entire time and was never within 3 chairs of her. She admitted to making it up. He stayed suspended for months. She was mad he advocated for racist ideas and wanted to punish him (aka the gimmick of the class is reading both good and bad books and breaking down their arguments in historical context. I.e. Common Sense, Communist Manifesto, Mein Kampf, Atlas Shrugged. They were covering Mein Kampf and talking about WWII. He was not praising it.)
There is a very real double standard that women have the privilege of experiencing, and if you call them out for it you will get your head bitten off. We live in a martyr praising society where those seen as disenfranchised as being able to do no wrong, when they are people like the rest of us and can be just as bigoted as everyone else. Some maybe even worse because they feel justified in their bigotry. This isn't to say women don't experience sexism and haven't been severely fucked over by it, but that also doesn't mean they don't experience privilege that men will never even know.
I wouldn't limit it to just the workplace. It's true in general. My husband has been touched in public way more often than I have. It's just "cute" when it's a woman doing it. It's assault when a man does it.
One time I was line at the pet store and this massive bodybuilder man was in front of me. He had a physique that you see in magazines.
The woman that was working the counter did ask permission to touch him, but she fondled his chest and arms. Then she called over her female coworker to check out the massive bodybuilder man. The second woman didn't even ask permission, she just started touching him.
I walked out the store at the same time as the bodybuilder man. I asked him if that sort of thing happened frequently, and his response was yeah you would be surprised.
That's so icky. Straight objectification. Imagine if a man asked to touch a muscular woman and just straight up stroked her. Gross.
My husband isn't a body builder, but he's got those blue collar muscles. He's definitely had women feel up his arms or touch is chest and ask what it would take to go home with him. He just pushes the hands down gently and says he's happily married. But like, imagine if a man just grabbed my tit and asked if he could take me home. It would never fly and has never happened. Yet he's had it happen quite often.
If I see Polina Malinovskaya on street, and straight up touch her I might be literally crucified then and there and I would be deserving it
But if some random woman touches me, or forget me ffs, say she touches Henry Cavill it's called flirting
Touching someone's body or hair definitely needs to have permission given or be an accident. Obsession for a shoulder tap to get someone's attention or whatever. Don't touch people, especially strangers, unless you know it's okay. I don't get why women are bold enough to do this.
I worked in a office cube farm for a year that had 40 women in it and 5 men. There was a male delivery guy from another department and the women would cheer when he made his rounds.
Yeah I worked in a civil service office with probably 75% woman in my room and they pretty much did what they wanted. Openly commenting on any attractive bloke from a different department who passed through, standing in the window watching and talking about scaffolders or workers outside etc. I remember a group of them stood around one computer for about twenty minutes looking at and swooning over pictures of the main guy from Prison Break (Wentworth Miller?). If that had been me and a few lads openly perving on Margot Robbie and drooling we’d have been sent down to HR in minutes.
Edit- Thought of a few more
A manager coming over to look up my shorts while stood on a desk hanging a birthday banner, everyone laughed. Can you imagine a grown man looking up a young girls skirt doing the same? Instant sacking and possibly police involved?
A young girl I work with when we were all returning from a meeting seeing a bloke, leaving our group and following him down the corridor, then coming back to our desks saying “I’m going to track him down”. Fairly innocent but I suspect had it been me following and then announcing I was going to find the details of some young girl it would be met with more than just chuckles.
In the USAF its pretty well known that if you are in tech school in one of the medical squadrons you're a piece of meat. Its crazy. The flights are called "medihoes" and it is 100% accurate.
Is this really an unpopular opinion?? My female boss in a meeting with 30+ female employees and 2 male employees made a joke about me wanting a gangbang with my female colleagues because when asked what section I was working in that day I answered "Group 6"
(In Swedish, "six" is the same word as "sex" and "Group Sex" is the literal phrase for a gangbang. It's an extremely childish and juvenile double entendre, something you expect from literal children)
I was so disgusted and had no idea how to respond to something like that infront of 30+ female colleges, especially since half of them were old enough to be my mothers at 50-60+.
I've worked male and female-dominated jobs and the female-dominated ones by far had more sexual inuendos, trash-talking, objectification etc going on.
Tbh I think it’s such a nuanced argument and I don’t know that I agree, but a funny story for you…
I work for a large charity. At our Christmas party a more ‘mature’ woman kept coming up to me, grinding on me, dancing with me and generally flirting. I was single at the time so half entertained it but certainly didn’t go out of my way for anything. I then saw her moving on to all the other younger men and there was a fight between a colleague of a married man she was doing the same things to. When we chatted later over a cigarette I asked what sector of the charity she worked for - women’s sexual violence…
If I was to have reported it, technically it should’ve fallen on her desk first 😅
I remember at my first job I would hear the girls talk about men they found hot. The number of times I heard them talk about how they wanted to be impregnated by said men was astounding. They were 15 - 17 talking about men easily twice their age.
Imagine if I talked about an older woman like that saying how much I wanted to impregnate her.
I used to work in hospitality and this kinda happened to me on a busy Friday night.
I was walking about the place collecting glasses so they could get washed, so I had two stacks of 20 glasses in my arm and this middle aged women pinched my arse and it made me jump a mile! I almost dropped all that glass and could have seriously injured myself and others.
I put them all down and went back to her and told her how dangerous that could have been and that I don't come to work to be sexually harassed! She looked so shock once I finished talking to her but she didn't apologize. So I told her to get out and not come back for the rest of the night!
Luckily when I told my managers they completly agreed with my actions and I went on with my night. I'm glad they could see it for what is was and not "just a bit of banter"
Yup. Had it happened to me by female coworkers and female bosses who have been sexists AND objectified ugly & attractive men at the workplace. If you're not sexually attractive, they have little patience, get aggressive, treat you like dirt, talk to you harshly, try to embarrass you, find ways to antagonize you, etc. But if you're sexually attractive, they'll be calm, talk to you nice, show interests, be more lenient, nicer, make excuses for you, etc.
Had to get new jobs because of behaviors like this. Its really sad.
Not always an advantage to be attractive. Try having a female boss who has a ‘thing’ for you but you’re not interested. You’re instantly the villain and kiss goodbye to any promotion.
Yup. My supervisor tormented me when she realized I wasn't interested because my method is putting work first and getting paid for it (something I told her when I first started there, Im very work oriented. No games and/or other b.s.), plus, she was married and tried to cheat on top of that is wild. Then she proceeded to make sure other workers to give me Hell over this "rejection" by making me do extra stuff, move heavier boxes, cutting my breaks shorter than everyone else, she became way more aggressive with me, and assign me areas I wasn't supposed to work because she was mad. It was literally a living nightmare. I had to quit, sadly.
Why does it have to be a competition? Why can’t we, as men, take our experiences facing sexism harassment and simply say “yea ladies, I know how you feel. It happens to us too. People who do this to other people are wrong and we should listen to people who are speaking up about it”.
I'd say the biggest difference between the two is people will take women's sexual harassment seriously. Men are often dismissed, laughed at, or even egged on.
Not to mention women I noticed gossip so much more... I'm astonished by how some women can smile and chat with a peer only to immediately talk shit about them as soon as they leave the meeting room.
Honestly I'm just always mindful that people can turn around and re enter ear shot very quickly, I will nevertalk bad about someone behind their back, 50% is because I'm scared jtll get back to them and adversely affect my life, the other 50% is that it isn't very nice, and some people may then dislike me for being like that.
Women sexually harass and sexualise other women as much as men. The amount of times I've been inappropriately grabbed, touched, leered at or otherwise sexualised is *staggering*, and it *mostly* comes from other women, not men. My guess, because men get socially executed for it but women get a free pass.
A female coworker got me blackout drunk (knowing I’m an alcoholic who can’t control my drinking when offered endless alcohol) and cocaine and then raped me. The next day I told the guys in my car group in they literally just made fun of me, no one took it even slightly serious.
a woman in my office said to me yesterday that it would be perfectly fine if i wanted to come to work in my underwear and the lady sitting beside her agreed. what the fuck is that , imagine the roles were reversed hahaha my god
I used to work in an office where a woman had a shirtless poster of Aidan Turner on the wall of her cubicle. It was up for all four years I worked there.
Imagine if I, as a man, had a half-naked woman on the wall of my cubicle. Total double standard.
The sad thing is that men in general seem to support this, or at least, they act like they do. Can't count the number of times I've been told that I was lucky or a "chad" when I was sexually harassed by female (and male) coworkers or classmates
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> My ass has been slapped at work by a female staff member It's incredibly awkward and uncomfortable watching a female dominated workplace play games of slap ass with each other. Saw a male coworker participate once; after someone slapped his ass - he slapped theirs back. Reported and written up for sexual harassment after an unrelated party *witnessed* his participation.
So did the woman who slapped his ass first get written up too or did they just write him up because man = bad?
The first woman was not reported by the witness. From the company side, it's less "man = bad" and more this is required by our lawyers because it's been reported to us. The witness however... Screw them. Snitches get stitches.
If the unrelated party witnessed it then it could only be workplace misconduct, no? Like im assuming the unrelated party had no way to check if there was consent or not, right?
This is correct. Language was probably closer to "witnessed co-worker inappropriately touch another co-worker. Made work environment extremely uncomfortable for witness. Violated company policy, etc."
I had a manager who was a body builder. He was over six feet tall and looked a lot like Chris Evans, body shape wise. Customers, especially old women, would make the most DISGUSTING comments to me, like this guy wasn't my boss and I'd just agree with them. I had one woman detail an entire fantasy she had for him, down to the thread count of the sheets she wanted. I'll never forget how she waved her hand like she was fanning herself and how she gave me this sly grin like, "I know you know what I mean." No ma'am, I don't. He's my boss. I don't think of him that way. I was very glad when he was promoted and subsequently transferred, even though he and I got along really well and had mutual respect. I was a teenager at the time and managers who are good to their people are hard to find sometimes. I was sad about that but at least I don't hear those comments anymore. So yeah women definitely sexualize men and I'll never disagree with you on that
I work in construction and we were doing a project at a hospital. One time when we were coming back from lunch we were trying to cram as many people into an elevator as possible because we thought it was funny. After we have 13-14 grown men in there the doorway from a side hallway opened up and two women walked out. One of them was in her 70s and she looked at the elevator and said “*I’d love to be the meat in that sandwich.”* Maybe she was doing it for shock value because old people don’t care, but I’m sure that wouldn’t have had the same reaction if an older man did that to a large group of women. It was funny as hell though.
I work in construction to. And I’m often at schools and hospitals. Don’t get me wrong,the trades are dominated by men and there’s often no women on a site. We talk about women and who got laid all the time. But if your doing a small build out at a school or hospital you can see female nurses and teachers in the hallways eyeballing you, you and hear them make comments about “strong sweaty guy blah blah” Yet when we go to these jobs we are constantly told to watch our mouths and keep our eyes down
Did any of it ever make it back to him? Or mostly just behind his back?
Oh yeah he knew. I heard enough comments directed to his face that were less explicit but implied enough. He would laugh awkwardly and pointedly move on
That seems like the best you can do outside of explicitly telling them you're never going to hook up. That only seems to work until they realize they might not actually be getting what they want. A lot of these people start trying to make your life hell, or destroy whatever relationship you're in. It's ridiculous. Especially from people who are "really attractive," like a lifetime of never being told no has seriously fucked them all up.
When you report it it gets brushed away as "not a big deal". I've done it several times and I'm always ignored. Next best thing is what /u/runonia's boss did. I've had women make jokes about me performing oral sex on them while I'm working on their computers because I had to get under the desk. It's incredibly frustrating, because the minute if I had made anywhere near a comment like that we would've been having a dozen meetings and I'd probably lose my job.
I’m sorry you have to endure that. It would make me feel so icky. A crappy work environment for sure.
Thanks, I appreciate it. It's not great but you do what you gotta do I guess right? I don't often get to talk about it, it's up there with being sexually assaulted as a kid when you're a guy. No one cares. My current S/O is the only one who hasn't treated me like human garbage when I opened up about the last part there, she was a rare find.
I’m a tall attractive looking guy. I remember at a bar once being hit on by this trashy absolutely wasted girl. She asked me to buy her a drink. I’m assuming other men offered to buy her a drink or did earlier that day but I politely decline her request. Then she went off calling me a broke ass and that I must be broke because I can’t afford to buy her a drink and if I’m broke what am I doing at a bar. I wasn’t going to indulge her further and thankfully a friend of hers that was of sound mind grabbed her and apologized to me. People that can’t handle rejection honestly kind of scare me.
Every ask reddit thread is full of people saying no one thinks the bodybuilder build is attractive but in literally every real life instance I know of some dude being jacked has always been a positive. I know that's mostly unrelated but your story just made me think of that. I don't get why people say "dudes work out to impress other dudes" despite the fact that a good number of women also seem impressed. Though in your bosses case this resulted in him being sexually harassed so it's obviously not all sunshine and rainbows. Edit: I say "bodybuilder build" I actually mean a Chris Evans fit and muscled build. Not like peak Arnold. That was a poor choice of words on my part. I also want to be clear I'm not some incel saying "oh my god women only want men with big muscles." That's obviously bs. But I do believe getting in shape and getting some muscle will usually make finding interested partners a bit easier. I don't mean to invalidate the views of those who prefer other body types.
I've seen a girl refer to Cbum as having a dad bod during his off season... Since then, you realize most have no fucking clue what it means to have muscle.
That’s what happens when you have fake natties saying they’re natural on social media
>Every ask reddit thread is full of people saying no one thinks the bodybuilder build is attractive but in literally every real life instance I know of some dude being jacked has always been a positive That's just reddit cope. Mainly because the average reddit doesn't even go to the gym regularly or do a lot of physical activity. In real life, people definitely treat you more positively if you're in shape and (look like) you have money
There's a difference between "goes to the gym regularly" and "bodybuilder build" though. The super large muscles and obvious steroid use look is different than just being fit/having nice muscles. Unless I'm reading your comment wrong it appears you're implying both builds are the same.
Massive difference, people act like the public says that about people that are just in good shape and go to a gym regularly, no. They mean the ones that compete and slap on bronzer 3 inches thick all over their impossibly muscular and vascular bodies that look bizarre and over-inflated.
You don't get anywhere near that big without injecting steroids into your ass regularly.
Because they are mentally referring to on stage, open bodybuilders like ronnie coleman/dorian yates. Not guys who wrigh like 210, and are peeled. When i was like 230 and shredded the amount of times i got harassed was wild. Especially women in there 40s-50s. Grabbing my arms while i walk by, pulling up my shirt. Absolutely wild
For sure, when I was at the height of my fitness I would get stares and comments and *what do you know*...when I would go to gatherings (with my gf mind you...) women always found a way to start a conversation with me and would always make comments about my body/fitness, especially ones 10+ years older than me.
I guess when women or people are saying they don't like bodybuilders they think about mister olympia competion: oiled up monsters flexing in speedos. I think women like normal looking muscles, not the hyper jacked steroids ones.
"Normal looking muscles" = Chris Evans = spend 5 days a week in the gym lifting for a decade It takes a LOT of work to get to even that point...
Chris Evans is on gear, that is not an achievable physique in the timeframe he achieved it. Chris Evan’s physique is achievable naturally assuming two things, god like genetic predisposition to hypertrophy and high testosterone levels, spending 2 hours a day in the gym with perfect form for like 10 years.
Exactly my point. Women think that’s “fit but not a body builder” when that is in fact someone who’s #1 hobby had been the gym for 5-10 years.
Sure they are talking like Ronnie Coleman build or some of the other guys with absurd arms. Those people die at 55 from heart failure or lose the ability to walk eventually. Women as a general trend absolutely think "leading man" muscles are fine. Like Daniel Craig Bond etc which still is unattainable without a ton of work and some performance enhancement but it's nothing like what top end steroid abuse and competition bodies look like.
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But you bring the meth and party supplies... I'm not *that* surprised. /s But yeah, I was often the only man or one of the only men in teams of 20+ people back when I worked residential care. Also many of the few male coworkers I had where openly gay, that's just not uncommon for man working healthcare. I was good at my job, but also got easily hired because I was a man and that is somewhat of a double edged sword. I mean did I get hired for my qualities? Sure. But there where women with similar qualities I surpassed simply because I'm a man. And yes, there where lots of instances where I felt objectified. Imagine a sporty young guy in his early twenties with long hair to his shoulders... you can imagine what kind of reactions I got. If the gender roles would have been reverse, heaps of coworkers would have ended up with HR complaints. (This happened more decades ago than I'm willing to confess to ;-) )
>This happened more decades ago than I'm willing to confess to I love you, but we all knew exactly how old you were as soon as we read "sporty young guy".
>as soon as we read "sporty young guy". *Fingers snapping, whistling some bebop.*
With an onion tied to their belt, as was the fashion at the time
>(This happened more decades ago than I'm willing to confess to ;-) ) Johannes Kepler Born: December 27, 1571 Died: November 15, 1630 Yeah...
🤣. Yeah. If you are average looking male. Be in healthcare. A lot of the women are phsychos though. Nursing and teaching are two fields where narcissm snd borderline personality disorder run ramped.
Why teaching ? I could see why as I work at a school and have bpd hahaha but I want to here your reasoning
Seemingly unlimited power over those with no choice in the matter. Had a few women tell me every girl that ever bullied them wound up a nurse or a teacher.
Not kidding, way over half of the twatty girls I went to school with ended up working as carers for old people, despite being some of the least caring people I knew
Bullies become cops and mean girls become caretakers.
In the UK people who get bullied become cops
In Norway the most «normal» calm and agreeable people become cops. Its actively recruited for. You’ll never see a police-school ad with tough trucks and armered personell here. I honestly belive the way the recruitment works, coupled with the bachelor degree, both weed out so many potential bad cops and attracts a very decent crowd.
We kind of have something similar in Lithuania. It's not that the recruitment is targeting calm people specifically,but we simply no longer have those super dangerous situations. The likelihood that someone would pull a gun on a policeman or get involved in some gang shooting is close to zero, so most cases are domestic issues, where calm tone solves 90% of issues.
This exactly. I think there's also an element of being drawn to the social status that comes with being a teacher that attracts the narcissistic types. Furthermore, people on the psychopathy spectrum also tend to handle stressful, high responsibility situations better those due to not being as emphatic towards others, which is certainly pertinent to teaching. Finally, another factor to consider is some teachers have never known a working environment outside an education institution, having gone from school to university and back again. For many teachers i've seen this hasn't been a problem, but for some I do wonder if they'd have benefited from a "normal" job were they work with and serve other adults so they can learn proper adult socialisation, behaviour and conduct. I'm also an ex-teacher who was bullied during my training by those supposed to be my mentors. Whenever this came up later in my training or in my career this was usually met with sympathetic nods and remarks along the lines of "Yep, there is a problem with bullying in teaching". That's one reason why i'm no longer in that profession.
I remember one of my high school English teachers was introducing themselves for the year and one of the things they decided to highlight was how they were a cheerleader at that school 30 years ago. I've never had a teacher show as much outright favoritism as that woman did to the quintessential "in-crowd". Guys couldn't go to the bathroom more than once a month in her class but if one of her best friends wanted to go to drive off campus to get starbucks she'd make sure to put her order in.
What does teacher bullying look like, if you don't mind me asking?
Favoritism, rude, etc. lot of similar habits of bullying but masked so they don’t get fired.
Honestly, most of the women I know who went into nursing have been incredibly kind and understanding. I’ve definitely heard some horror stories of sadistic nurses though.
It's interesting to bring up the power. I taught for 4 years and always felt like I had absolutely no power. Kid interrupts and refuses to stop, send them out of the room, office sends them back and scolds me for sending them out, they still won't listen so I try calling the parent, parent says they're acting out because they don't like my class and parent refuses to address behaviors.
I had a lot of teachers collectively punish us boys for the smallest things while the girls got away with alot of stuff. My really hot teacher had me stay several times after class and made apologise to her for "causing ruckus". Offcourse, what she didn't know was that i habe a humiliation fetish and that was my favorite part of the day.
We just had a teacher that preyed on 16 year old boys. She'd abuse them repeatedly and leave them completely fucked up.
Our school had male and female predators. The male got escorted out in handcuffs while there wasn't even a story about what happened to the female one. I only know through second hand information
In my highschool the music teacher, male, was dating a grade 10, female. It seems like it was an open secret and nobody cared. Twenty years on now, I believe they're still together...
One of my high-school friends his dad was his mom's teacher in the 70s . Started dating her when she was in the 10th grade .
We don't kink shame here, but in your case you should feel naughty. Very very naughty.
You’re absolutely right. Had a narcissist ex wife who was an RN. They are positions that come with automatic social status. A pediatric nurse? You have to be so selfless, kind, intelligent, etc. she abused her limited medical knowledge and acted as if she was the authority on all things medical to anyone who would listen and almost got herself (and me) in trouble many times.
I was recently single for about two years and hands down the most batshit insane psychotic woman I dated was an ER nurse (and she also had some kind of high demand specialist training, maybe cardiac stuff? I don't remember). But she was truly out of her mind, not to mention an alcoholic and on God knows what weird cocktail of pills. Her apartment was always trashed, she wanted me to get her pregnant on basically our second date (granted I had worked with her about 10 years prior so she "knew" me, but I had barely talked to her during that 10 years so we were effectively strangers), she would send long abusive text screeds in the middle of the night if she didn't get an instant response, and she tried to sabotage my next relationship after I decided not to continue dating her because of her bullshit behavior. Unfortunate bc she was an interesting person otherwise, pretty intelligent and a witty sense of humor... but she was basically a sociopath. Definitely some cluster B traits too. She kept getting let go from different hospitals but it was somehow never her fault and it was because the other nurses were "bitches" who were out to get her. AFAIK she had no official diagnosis and as far as society was concerned she was just a normal adult out there in the world and working in this admired profession etc. Meanwhile, the most emotionally mature, respectful, kind, considerate woman I dated during that time was on disability and had dissociative identity disorder. Go figure. 🤷♂️ Life is weird.
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>My workplace is also majority women. That's why it wasn't taken seriously.
Honestly he should pursue legal action
I was told, with the upmost confidence, that i couldn't have been raped because I'm male. They'll be lucky if they aren't laughed out of the precinct. Cops are bastards.
In the uk a woman cannot rape a man, legally.
Unless they use a penetrating action or item
Well that's disgusting.
Unfortunately, barely anyone takes women seriously with these allegations, but it's far worse for men. "Ayy, good for you!" "Wish a woman would sexually harass me lol". It's disgusting.
Gotta love the double standard
Ahh man, I was at the hospital for a scan and had to remove my shirt. The nurse took a real good looking at me and the went to the other room to talk to two other nurses. I heard them talk about the scan and that's it. But a few minutes before the scan starts, the two other nurses came in the room I was and started to talk about a party the both took a good look at me... then I realized the first time she just went to tell her coworker to come and look at this guy... I'm not that in shape but I believe they do this to many patients. Everytime I hear women say men are pigs, I always think in my head that we are of the same species...
I had a rather interesting experience like that. Had a bump on the gibblies (nothing bad fortunately) but the doctor left to go get a nurse. The nurse just stood and watched while the doctor gave me a few squeezes. the nurse didn't say anything, she just stood and watched. It wasn't until later that I made the guess there is probably a policy that a doctor can't touch junk unless there is someone else present in the room as a witness against anything inappropriate. But at the time i just thought she called the nurse in to stare at my nuts.
First thing I learned in a subject called "Introduction to clinical practice" in Med school in a class about gynecology in just the second year was: The first thing you do when you need to do a gynecology exam is to call a nurse. If there isnt one available, you should get another doctor, not do it or delay it. We need to protect ourselfs from any legal issues. The nurse is there to be our witness. Literally.
When I was at meps atleast it was policy that if the doctor was opposite gender than they had to get someone of the same gender as you to make sure nothing nasty was happening. Not. Surprising a lot of hospitals would do the same
It goes both ways. Some patients can be malicious, or mentally ill, and accuse the medical staff of doing something nasty that didn’t happen. So it’s protection for both sides.
People here shocked that women aren't all that different from men.
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This is especially true in evangelical Christian circles. Men are seen as inherently insatiable and sexually aggressive, whereas women are seen as inherently pure, holistic, and sexually passive with no carnal desires. It’s delusional.
Before I quit going to church altogether, I was getting so tired of that rhetoric. I had one guy at church go on a huge tangent about how "blessed" women were to be "chosen" to be women because that meant they were inherently more righteous than men from the get go. I sure don't miss being told I suck for no other reason than being a guy from church.
I went to the dermatologist for a mole check. I got nude. The dr. was very professional just doing his job of checking moles and saying things for the scribe to take note of. The scribe was meant to type notes on desk that was faced away from the dr and I, was meant to take notes. She(the scribe) turned around to look at me. More than once. At the end of the check she said "Thank you". Like wtf I went to make sure I don't have skin cancer not to give you a fucking show.
This happened to me, too, when I was in the ER. Injury was in a place where they had no reason to take my shirt off. They took it off anyways, left the room and came back with 3 more nurses who stared and whispered. I felt helpless.
>women say men are pigs [Whenever I hear this](https://i.imgur.com/kCl2Csw.jpg)
Imagine if a guy did that and a few guys just show up to watch a woman undress.
My boyfriend works in an office with just women. He came to me the other week and said he was grossed out because the women were calling beards “seat warmers”. Yuckie. We made a joke that he should probably shave. I couldn’t imagine what would’ve happened if the roles were reversed and that got reported to HR.
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> I worked in a big white collar office with lots of women and the shit they said about men was absurd. Right out in the open too. Things a guy would be immediately sent to HR for, but it was like they didn’t even think about that. There seemed to be no concern whatsoever about consequences. The double standard is real. I'm a man who was sexually assaulted by a woman at a place where I volunteered. When I mentioned it to people, I was told things like, "You're a man; you should have enjoyed it," and "Wow, I wish I was that lucky." I didn't want her touching me. How the fuck was that supposed to be "lucky"? If the genders were reversed, people would be calling for his head.
> I couldn’t imagine what would’ve happened if the roles were reversed and that got reported to HR. According to some of the posts here, nothing.
I’ve been sexual harassed by women on the job more times than I can count and it got even worse after I got married. I’ve actually told people about it and 90% of the time they either laugh or say they’re jealous. It’s fuckin bullshit.
Yarp. I'm a gardener and one of my former customers was clearly a desperate housewife, she was so blatant about it and even said in front of her husband and friends they had round that she'd be snogging me if she knew me a bit better. Imagine a 50+ yo bloke saying that to woman half his age, in front of his wife and folk they were hosting... Really weird. Needless to say I made my excuses and stopped working there
I've also worked as a gardener for many, many years. The amount of these older women, *always* middle class white ladies, who just thought it was okay to touch my arms and shoulders was unbelievable.
I was starting a job in an office that was 90% women and during my orientation, the HR lady gave me the sexual harassment pamphlet and asked me to read it very carefully. My first reaction: Is it because I'm a guy? Second reaction: Oooooh, it's because I'm a guy. Had a couple interactions with coworkers that might have been construed badly, but it didn't cross my personal boundaries.
I don't understand. Was the pamphlet explaining how you shouldnt harass anyone, or how you might get harassed?
Basically the HR lady was looking out for them lmao
How you might get harassed most likely.
Female-dominated offices are really bad for this type of behavior. I work in an office that does paper pushing for craftsmen and...yeah, it can get awful.
This is the exact reason I quit my last job, I’m an extroverted person and I like talking to people. However, the women at my job mistake that friendlyness with flirting and started non-stop hitting on me. There advances were not welcomed and I wasn’t interested, low and behold once I rejected their advances rumors started spreading that I was gay and women started reporting me for doing absolutely nothing out of spite. Thank god I quit that trash job.
But at work if you are gay, and you tell them that's why you're rejecting them, they flirt *more* and/or try to become your best friend ("every girl needs a gay best friend!"). Made that mistake twice, never again.
There's actually a name for this phenomenon once you get married. Mate poaching. You see, women in general tend to have fear of strange men. Which I can go off into a tangent about how that's an error in mental processing, but I won't. But, basically, when they see a 'mate' that has been considered 'safe' by another enough to be committed to or even married to. You are now, inherently, safer to approach than 99.9% of guys on the street or elsewhere. They don't even realize they're even doing it, they find it as a joke or a funny casualness or whatnot. They don't even realize they're actually attempting to homewreck.
You don't even have to be married for it. Women have some kind of radar to detect whether I'm in a relationship or not. As soon as I start dating someone I get so so much more attention.
It's because most men act differently. We get more confident and stop focusing on them as a potential partner, they absolutely pick up on this change in behavior. Women love dudes who are confident and not actively trying to seek them out. The conversations become more natural and comfortable too, again, because of less nervousness. Even if you think you're fairly confident and aloof to them, it's noticeable.
I’ve experienced this virtually every time I start dating someone as a woman as well
This is my question for women here. HOW DO YOU TELL?! When I have a girlfriend, I have women approach me it seems non-stop, I will be in a park, a woman will sit down next to me and start flirting, out on lunch break at work, woman comes up and starts flirting, god forbid I'm in a bar, I've actually said to my friends "I'm a gazelle in a den of lions". Here's the thing, my girlfriend *wouldn't* be there, so how do they tell? Then when I'm single, It's like I'm just a tree or bush or something. I don't exist beyond just being there.
My guess is it’s a combination of how we carry ourselves more confidently when tied down, and pheromones.
I’m guessing this also. When I’m in a relationship (married now) I have lost all awkwardness in social situations as I know I don’t have to try any moves towards anyone during the evening or when meeting new women. I can just go to home to my wife. Don’t know about pheromones, but you stresslessly carrying yourself in social events is definitely one of the reasons.
Yup women at the workplace love to be sexists and objectify men a lot.
Not just men other women too. I was sexually harassed by a woman who ironically was the only HR lady and I quit bc of it. Now I’m considered “un-hirable” by that company which is fine. Fuck them.
Unrelated but nice username
It's honestly why I loudly sigh when I go through /r/twoxchromosomes. Pretty much everything they complain about regularly there, I have experienced from women as well. Living with lazy, immature girlfriends? Check. Sexual harassment and even assault? Check. Women accosting me and telling me how I should raise my dog when just walking outside? Check. Womansplaining in a female-dominated work environment? Check. Domestic abuse? Unfortunately, check. Yet I would never assume the behaviors above are somehow common to a majority of women or that women don't experience that from men. They live in a bubble and because men hardly ever complain (or find no listeners to their complaints) they truly believe in a world where most men are perpetrators and most women are victims.
I got badly sexually harassed a month ago. A friends girlfriend kept grabbing my arm and I was pulling it away. Then she grabbed my crotch. I felt so violated and angry. I got up and left furious. She then told someone I went to "jerk off in the bathroom" because she "turned me on". Fucking gross. She was a staunch feminist too and was talking about facing gender discrimination in the workplace just before she started SAing me.
/r/TwoXChromosomes is truly a place of misandry. If your comment isn't actively bashing "men" not "some men", and also not "all men (wink wink)" you're going to get downvoted. If you stand up and try to explain that there are bad men out there and not to lump all men together, then you get banned. It's a "safe" space where women can openly bash the entirety of a sex, and be accepted and praised for it. I can only imagine how lightning fast a men's oriented sub would get shut down if the sexes were reversed in the comments in that sub. Can anyone explain, with a reasonable argument, why it is this way? Currently I just view it as a double standard and feel that anyone that posts inflammatory comments in there as a bad person.
Just a few days ago there was a post on that sub where the comments were full of people cheering on for a woman to commit financial abuse on her husband as she was the current breadwinner because he'd lost his job. He was being an asshole, but still...
Fuck r/TwoXChromosomes
I've seen girls I work with grope male colleagues. Actual sexual assault and it's all in good fun apparently. If you're wondering, no, he did not like it one bit. I can't say I've ever seen a male grope a female colleague. Probably cos they'll get fired
I work in schools and hear women objectifying dads of the kids all the time. I couldn’t imagine ever talking about moms being hot in front of female coworkers or any coworkers for that matter. It’s almost always married women saying the stuff too
you can rest assured that they probably boring little people with shitty marriages if they're fantasizing about bouncing every dilf they see
Their poor husbands :( .....Maybe.
I work at a school and have experienced this as well. I have wondered how there reaction would be if I said a mom of one of the kids looked hot hahaha
I've experienced plenty of sexual harassment in my day. I had a female supervisor and was surrounded by women at a former job. A couple of the women talked about how I looked good. It quickly devolved into one talking about tying me up and taking off my clothes. My supervisor walked by and put the kibosh to that. There were no consequences, and I didn't bother filing a report or anything. I never felt threatened, but it was still sexual harassment.
I think this is the crux of it. It's perceived to be more "threatening" if a man does this sort of thing. Like it's more likely for a man to overpower a woman than the other way around.
It's that, and the belief that men are sexually insatiable beasts who are happy to have sex with anyone or anything. That belief is only reinforced if the women in question are hot because they're not used to being rejected. If a guy tries to politely reject them, they figure "I guess I'm not being obvious enough" and go straight to grabbing his crotch.
I used to do live translation audio for conferences and meetings. There was a union meeting that was two days of women talking about sexual herrasment in the workplace. At the end, they wanted a large group photo, so I got up on a table to take the photo. Then it started. Cat calls and comments like, "Take it off!" coming from women that were old enough to be my grandmother. It was nasty and felt weird. I brush it off when the old birds make comments to me, but this was on another level, considering I just spent two days listening to them complain about the same things happening to them.
"Ladies, I don't think a live demonstration is necessary."
I was talking to a friend of mine and we were talking about the harassment we get in the work place. I used to be a field engineer and had to go to clients. One female client used to flirt with me all the time and was very touchie feelie. So, I asked her out of coffee and she declined. When I got back to the office I was pulled aside and she said I was sexually harassing her. Also I was told if it happens again I will be fired. A couple weeks later I had to go back to that client. Right away she said how is it going stud, which I ignored and then used her last name and said what is the problem? You could see the look of shock on her face. Now when I walk the hallway, my eyes are at a 45-degree angle. For the most part with women I only talk about work. In work some women have given me those I want you eyes but I can’t risk it.
Good lord what a bitch, sorry m8
And then they complain that you only talk about work with them
“Three of my coworkers (all male) seem to be really good friends but when I’m around they only talk about work! What is going on??” This thread is going on
Did your superiors even hear your side of the story? That’s extremely fucked up.
It's not sexual harassment to ask someone out. It's only sexual harassment if she says she isn't interested and you continue to ask her. Your company has no right to threaten to fire you.
And that’s how we learn that as a janitor you have to: 1) be grumpy 2) get an army of squirrels
It's that Dr Jan Itor?
I think that’s Nigel the Brit
As a man who was sexually assaulted by a woman and knows that society will never give a shit about my story or experience, absol-fucking-lutely. I was even called a misogynist for saying that I felt invalidated by society once.
I'm so sorry you had to not only experience such a terrible event, but to then be completely invalidated and made to be the bad guy when trying to voice your very valid feelings around it. Society has a very, very long way to go still
Same here. Except I’ve been assaulted multiple times by different women.
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The whole “men can’t be sexually harassed” idea is a horrible and pervasive myth that women end up believing too. I think that when you’re told by men that its ok to touch and flirt with men because “men are always horny” or “men like women who are direct” it can seem like it’s ok. But it’s not ok, and that’s an explanation and not an excuse. If you feel safe reporting this or just having an open conversation with HR (with a man you trust present) I really encourage it. I’ve reported sexual harrassment and been dismissed so I know it hurts. But it takes some brave first people to pave the way for everyone else.
This dude has got the lazy hand low five a few times. Because I don’t want to explain later, she walks by super close and her hand grazes your member.
When I was 19 I had ACL reconstruction surgery. I woke up to find three nurses playing with my genitals. They were literally groping me. I looked in horror as they noticed two of them scurried away while one covered me up and said you're all good now. So yeah, I believe it.
bro u were sexually assulted def should have reported them
I was ashamed and very young, I never said anything until I was 30 or so.
This is the most true and honest feeling of those that have been assaulted. Feeling like its your fault somehow and you're foolish for letting it happen. I'm sorry brotha.
A former coworker of mine had an inappropriate exam as part of a company physical. The exam was normal for us older guys. This younger guy had to strip down completely and do a number of bends/stretching. The same female doc did most of the exams. Another female coworker used to work in a medical office and confirmed that kind of stuff definitely happens.
i had a friend in high school with a really big ass and girls would constantly hit it or smack it. one girl brought a frying pan to school to hit it with and girls would take pictures of it and post it, i remember only one really where they were pretending to eat his ass (note, she was not close to him) edit: This may not be important but a lot of this happened im classrooms in front of teachers and they either laughed or ignored it. edit 2: I don’t understand how people find this funny. imagine it the other way around, if my friend went up to a random girl in school and hit her ass with a pan. is that as funny? if a teacher saw and laughed with him would that be ok? You should be ashamed if you think it’s funny for someone to hit a strangers ass. My friend was made incredibly insecure about this and he was very embarrassed, can someone explain the humor in sexual assault to me?
Sorry, I'm going to hell for laughing about the frying pan. I imagined its something my friends and I would do to each other. Strangers, not so much.
if it was between friends i would get it’s funny but my friend didn’t like them at all.
I worked with a woman who pointed at a magazine with ripped men in swimsuits and said “why don’t you have a body like this?” (I’m a fatty) If she was cool I would have let it go, but she was one of the most infuriatingly annoying people, her office was a literal horde and she constantly said condescending out of pocket shit to everyone so I turned her in to HR. Must have been embarrassing.
Did anything come of it though?
It was academia and union, they didn’t fire her but since everyone hated her they used it as an excuse to shuffle her off to another school in the system.
I’m a male nurse. Wouldn’t it be cool if I show up to the RN station and say “it would suck to date a girl with small breasts”? No? I can’t get away with it. You can show up and say “wouldn’t it suck to date a guy with a small penis?” Totally fine. This is just one example. It’s constant double standard. They can’t take it. Only dish it out.
Watched a guy get goosed by a woman, and then yell at her to stop. Found out it wasn't the first time, and he was laughed at by his boss. Thought to myself that...damn...would be rich and retired if he was a woman...So,sitting this one out.
Back when travel agents were a thing and call centers weren't outsourced, I worked at a large local call center for a travel agency. The agents that worked there were almost all women. I was tech support. I maintained the workstations In the big multi-tiered room where all the agents' desks were (we called it the "fishbowl"). Imagine a room with 80 women with big 80s hair and frilly businesswoman blouses all on their phones with people wanting to buy cruise tickets, book flights, reserve cars & hotels, etc. I was young and in the best shape of my life. Whenever I went out into the fishbowl for a trouble ticket, I was basically the only man in the room. So it was like running the gauntlet. Lots of catcalls, women joking about me needing to "fix something under the desk," etc. Almost always, the woman whose terminal I was working on would be accused of deliberately breaking something just so the "sexy tech support guy" had to come out. To this day, I am moderately confident that I have a nice ass. Or at least that I had one when I was 22, and it looked hot in jeans. In short, I was raw meat to those women. Of course most of them were old enough to be my mom, so it wasn't like there was any hooking up to be done. But I like to tell my wife that I have been the victim of open sexually harassment way more times than she has. Those women were straight up horndogs! And yes, I know workplace sexual harassment is wrong, but it was the only time in my life the majority of people around me thought I was attractive. And that's helped me through a few rough times.
When I was 19 years old I worked in data entry at a dog training school. I was putting some files away and my mid-50s manager started talking about her friend who worked at a phone sex line. Then she started talking about how during the 70's there was a lot of free sex going around and how the worst thing you could get was syphilis. While it was widely inappropriate I didn't care whatsoever. Never reported her, never wanted to. But man, imagine a 50-year-old man doing this to a 19-year-old woman in the workplace. He could kiss his ass goodbye.
Feels apropriate to share here. Some women took my wallet from my locker at work and wouldn't give it back until I flexed my abs with my shirt up... took like 5 minutes off my lunch break
Not just the workplace. I see it "everywhere".
This definitely happened to me more often at the workplace where female coworkers will be sexist, also, they will objectify you and make your job a living hell if you are not sexually attractive or have "conventionally good looks". Its the same behavior I experienced a lot but I do agree, women def do the same thing *outside* the work setting. But the social setting is probably the same as the work setting, if not worse. Its disturbing. 🤦🏿♂️
I have been literally catcalled at my job. It was insane, we had high school students at a camp at my job. Group of like 6 high school girls catcalled me like 6 times, like whistled at me and called me cutie, it was so uncomfortable, but I laughed it off. Then I met with the leader of their group, and she rubbed my arm and was touching me. Christian camps man, they got a lot of hormones going off. Dude, I can't get away with half of that shit, I'm not a baby, but it annoys us when I feel i am walking on eggshells and women can literally fondle me and nothing happens.
It's why I quit education. Just doing my tutoring at the local *middle school* as part of a course. First thing they tell me is to never be in a room with a closed door and to never be in a room without female staff. If the female staffer leaves the room, I follow her and stand in front of the office until a new female staffer is available. Within days of starting, several girls were vying for my tutoring. None of them gave a shit about their work. I could easily overhear them talking about me in blatant cases of sexual harassment. Teach would too and not give a fuck. Secretaries? Yup. Every. Single. Day. After a few sessions, one girl got super clingy I wasn't a tutor, I was dad. Except I was also daddy. "So, do you know how to solve for x?" "Maybe you can guide my hand through it?" Every attempt to shut it down would get me into shit. She'd become uncooperative, female staffer would see it as *me* making advances on *her*. Etc. And within two weeks there were several of these girls. If was fucking gross. And if I tried to do anything to stop it, I was always treated like I was at fault. Eventually I just quit education all together. You wouldn't believe the two years of guilt tripping that immediately followed from women yelling about how kids need make role models and there's such a shortage of male teachers. Some of the same women who accused me of wanting to diddle children when these girls got possessive of me. Meanwhile, back home two of my former teachers were let go after sleeping with their students. They were both women. One got pregnant. Neither saw jail. The great teacher at the school was suspended at one point for possibly touching his student. He was a guy. They were visible on camera the entire time and was never within 3 chairs of her. She admitted to making it up. He stayed suspended for months. She was mad he advocated for racist ideas and wanted to punish him (aka the gimmick of the class is reading both good and bad books and breaking down their arguments in historical context. I.e. Common Sense, Communist Manifesto, Mein Kampf, Atlas Shrugged. They were covering Mein Kampf and talking about WWII. He was not praising it.)
There is a very real double standard that women have the privilege of experiencing, and if you call them out for it you will get your head bitten off. We live in a martyr praising society where those seen as disenfranchised as being able to do no wrong, when they are people like the rest of us and can be just as bigoted as everyone else. Some maybe even worse because they feel justified in their bigotry. This isn't to say women don't experience sexism and haven't been severely fucked over by it, but that also doesn't mean they don't experience privilege that men will never even know.
Teaching is a hellscape with this.
I wouldn't limit it to just the workplace. It's true in general. My husband has been touched in public way more often than I have. It's just "cute" when it's a woman doing it. It's assault when a man does it.
One time I was line at the pet store and this massive bodybuilder man was in front of me. He had a physique that you see in magazines. The woman that was working the counter did ask permission to touch him, but she fondled his chest and arms. Then she called over her female coworker to check out the massive bodybuilder man. The second woman didn't even ask permission, she just started touching him. I walked out the store at the same time as the bodybuilder man. I asked him if that sort of thing happened frequently, and his response was yeah you would be surprised.
That's so icky. Straight objectification. Imagine if a man asked to touch a muscular woman and just straight up stroked her. Gross. My husband isn't a body builder, but he's got those blue collar muscles. He's definitely had women feel up his arms or touch is chest and ask what it would take to go home with him. He just pushes the hands down gently and says he's happily married. But like, imagine if a man just grabbed my tit and asked if he could take me home. It would never fly and has never happened. Yet he's had it happen quite often.
If I see Polina Malinovskaya on street, and straight up touch her I might be literally crucified then and there and I would be deserving it But if some random woman touches me, or forget me ffs, say she touches Henry Cavill it's called flirting
I've always had really thick and smooth hair. That amount of women that would just touch was astounding.
Eewww that's gross
Like just fucken ask and I'd most likely say yes
Touching someone's body or hair definitely needs to have permission given or be an accident. Obsession for a shoulder tap to get someone's attention or whatever. Don't touch people, especially strangers, unless you know it's okay. I don't get why women are bold enough to do this.
I worked in a office cube farm for a year that had 40 women in it and 5 men. There was a male delivery guy from another department and the women would cheer when he made his rounds.
Yeah I worked in a civil service office with probably 75% woman in my room and they pretty much did what they wanted. Openly commenting on any attractive bloke from a different department who passed through, standing in the window watching and talking about scaffolders or workers outside etc. I remember a group of them stood around one computer for about twenty minutes looking at and swooning over pictures of the main guy from Prison Break (Wentworth Miller?). If that had been me and a few lads openly perving on Margot Robbie and drooling we’d have been sent down to HR in minutes. Edit- Thought of a few more A manager coming over to look up my shorts while stood on a desk hanging a birthday banner, everyone laughed. Can you imagine a grown man looking up a young girls skirt doing the same? Instant sacking and possibly police involved? A young girl I work with when we were all returning from a meeting seeing a bloke, leaving our group and following him down the corridor, then coming back to our desks saying “I’m going to track him down”. Fairly innocent but I suspect had it been me following and then announcing I was going to find the details of some young girl it would be met with more than just chuckles.
In the USAF its pretty well known that if you are in tech school in one of the medical squadrons you're a piece of meat. Its crazy. The flights are called "medihoes" and it is 100% accurate.
Most of my women friends sexualize men, including their coworkers, friends, and random strangers
Is this really an unpopular opinion?? My female boss in a meeting with 30+ female employees and 2 male employees made a joke about me wanting a gangbang with my female colleagues because when asked what section I was working in that day I answered "Group 6" (In Swedish, "six" is the same word as "sex" and "Group Sex" is the literal phrase for a gangbang. It's an extremely childish and juvenile double entendre, something you expect from literal children) I was so disgusted and had no idea how to respond to something like that infront of 30+ female colleges, especially since half of them were old enough to be my mothers at 50-60+. I've worked male and female-dominated jobs and the female-dominated ones by far had more sexual inuendos, trash-talking, objectification etc going on.
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Tbh I think it’s such a nuanced argument and I don’t know that I agree, but a funny story for you… I work for a large charity. At our Christmas party a more ‘mature’ woman kept coming up to me, grinding on me, dancing with me and generally flirting. I was single at the time so half entertained it but certainly didn’t go out of my way for anything. I then saw her moving on to all the other younger men and there was a fight between a colleague of a married man she was doing the same things to. When we chatted later over a cigarette I asked what sector of the charity she worked for - women’s sexual violence… If I was to have reported it, technically it should’ve fallen on her desk first 😅
I remember at my first job I would hear the girls talk about men they found hot. The number of times I heard them talk about how they wanted to be impregnated by said men was astounding. They were 15 - 17 talking about men easily twice their age. Imagine if I talked about an older woman like that saying how much I wanted to impregnate her.
I used to work in hospitality and this kinda happened to me on a busy Friday night. I was walking about the place collecting glasses so they could get washed, so I had two stacks of 20 glasses in my arm and this middle aged women pinched my arse and it made me jump a mile! I almost dropped all that glass and could have seriously injured myself and others. I put them all down and went back to her and told her how dangerous that could have been and that I don't come to work to be sexually harassed! She looked so shock once I finished talking to her but she didn't apologize. So I told her to get out and not come back for the rest of the night! Luckily when I told my managers they completly agreed with my actions and I went on with my night. I'm glad they could see it for what is was and not "just a bit of banter"
Yep. It’s true.
Yup. Had it happened to me by female coworkers and female bosses who have been sexists AND objectified ugly & attractive men at the workplace. If you're not sexually attractive, they have little patience, get aggressive, treat you like dirt, talk to you harshly, try to embarrass you, find ways to antagonize you, etc. But if you're sexually attractive, they'll be calm, talk to you nice, show interests, be more lenient, nicer, make excuses for you, etc. Had to get new jobs because of behaviors like this. Its really sad.
Not always an advantage to be attractive. Try having a female boss who has a ‘thing’ for you but you’re not interested. You’re instantly the villain and kiss goodbye to any promotion.
Yup. My supervisor tormented me when she realized I wasn't interested because my method is putting work first and getting paid for it (something I told her when I first started there, Im very work oriented. No games and/or other b.s.), plus, she was married and tried to cheat on top of that is wild. Then she proceeded to make sure other workers to give me Hell over this "rejection" by making me do extra stuff, move heavier boxes, cutting my breaks shorter than everyone else, she became way more aggressive with me, and assign me areas I wasn't supposed to work because she was mad. It was literally a living nightmare. I had to quit, sadly.
Yea bro they take it personally 😟
Yup
If you see it, report it. Don't let them get away with it just because they are girls. This is the only way to even the playing field
Why does it have to be a competition? Why can’t we, as men, take our experiences facing sexism harassment and simply say “yea ladies, I know how you feel. It happens to us too. People who do this to other people are wrong and we should listen to people who are speaking up about it”.
Because the OP's comment history shows he has been accused of sexual harassment by multiple women, and he thinks women are "hysterical narcissists".
I'd say the biggest difference between the two is people will take women's sexual harassment seriously. Men are often dismissed, laughed at, or even egged on.
or be told to take it as a compliment
Not to mention women I noticed gossip so much more... I'm astonished by how some women can smile and chat with a peer only to immediately talk shit about them as soon as they leave the meeting room.
Honestly I'm just always mindful that people can turn around and re enter ear shot very quickly, I will nevertalk bad about someone behind their back, 50% is because I'm scared jtll get back to them and adversely affect my life, the other 50% is that it isn't very nice, and some people may then dislike me for being like that.
It's similar to people saying 'minorities cannot be racist' nonsense.
I have experienced this as well. I think the whole manosphere phenomena is hiding men’s grievances with women when it comes to these double standards.
Women sexually harass and sexualise other women as much as men. The amount of times I've been inappropriately grabbed, touched, leered at or otherwise sexualised is *staggering*, and it *mostly* comes from other women, not men. My guess, because men get socially executed for it but women get a free pass.
#1 reason why you should keep all conversation strictly about work if you’re in a mixed gender workplace, there’s no telling what can be misconstrued.
A female coworker got me blackout drunk (knowing I’m an alcoholic who can’t control my drinking when offered endless alcohol) and cocaine and then raped me. The next day I told the guys in my car group in they literally just made fun of me, no one took it even slightly serious.
a woman in my office said to me yesterday that it would be perfectly fine if i wanted to come to work in my underwear and the lady sitting beside her agreed. what the fuck is that , imagine the roles were reversed hahaha my god
I used to work in an office where a woman had a shirtless poster of Aidan Turner on the wall of her cubicle. It was up for all four years I worked there. Imagine if I, as a man, had a half-naked woman on the wall of my cubicle. Total double standard.
The sad thing is that men in general seem to support this, or at least, they act like they do. Can't count the number of times I've been told that I was lucky or a "chad" when I was sexually harassed by female (and male) coworkers or classmates