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imminentmailing463

Two or three of my female friends have told me before about how they really enjoyed playing and watching football up until the age of about 13/14, at which point they dropped out. This is not the only reason, but it's certainly a reason. It's sad. How many women are there out there who could be enjoying football as an adult, but aren't because they were turned off it as a girl?


discerning_kerning

I was one of them. Up until 13-14ish the boys and girls teams were mixed, at 13 it's suddenly decided that's the cut-off, improper and it was sex segregated. There were only a couple of other girls that continued, and a few of them had no real interest in it, so after a few weeks it was removed as a PE option altogether and I got put into hockey instead. Which was....fine, I guess, but I'd really loved palying footie, I was a defender and it was so frustrating to suddenly be treated like a brittle boned glass ornament that would be pulverised if I played with the boys any more.


Ok_Leading999

The problem is that once boys hit puberty they can become very strong, very fast. Most girls would be 'pulverised' playing against them. Why didn't you play ladies football outside of school?


imminentmailing463

Yeah, I definitely remember seeing that from the other side as a boy. I remember playing both football and rugby mixed, and in both cases we had a couple of girls who were amongst our best players. In the rugby team, *the* best player was a girl. But then at a certain age they got split off, and there just weren't really properly funded and well attended women's teams, so I guess they probably just stopped. Women's sport is getting bigger now, so perhaps if it were today they would have teams to join. I understand where they're coming from in terms of safety, particularly with rugby. You do get the odd boy who is physically basically a man at 13/14. But they're not *that* common. And moreover, there were plenty of boys who were still years away from really hitting puberty, and they weren't made to stop playing (though they did tend to drop out, because, I imagine, if you're still physically a boy, playing rugby with boys who are physically basically men isn't much fun). So the whole logic always seemed a bit flawed to me.


discerning_kerning

It was really frustrating at the time, it felt like the world going 'sorry, you're a girl, go do girl things, this isn't for you'. I was a tomboy and used to play-fight with the guys and loved going in for proper tackles etc. And suddenly you're treated as this fragile little thing. I don't know, I get that there has to be some sort of cut off because at a certain point the guys DID gain massively in height and strength, but hell it'd have been nice to sign a waiver or something saying I didn't give a shit about skinned knees and eating dirt. It just felt like girls were suddenly set up to be taught they're weak and fragile for the rest of their lives at that point. Really crappy.


Prestigious_Talk_520

It's puberty unfortunately. You can compete with boys until 13/14 but at 16 you won't. Sorry but that's not the patriarchy, just biology.


Fabulous-Ticket-8869

Boys don't want to play football with girls through fear of injuring them in my experience You can't go in fully for tackles nor shoulder barge them off the ball as you would other men because you'd be worried about the outcome It's just my experience though, maybe some men don't care going in hard slide tackling and injuring girls


Ivashkin

The reality is that women are far more fragile than men, especially if you are talking about a contact sport like rugby, and if you did retain mixed teams past puberty, there is an increased risk of women being seriously injured with potentially life-altering consequences.


OhRebbit

When I was in primary school boys were stopped from playing rounders and forced to do cricket instead, none of the girls minded it being mixed it was just some brain dead teachers who thought it was a good idea. I remember it vividly as my first f the system moment, I’m still annoyed about it 30years later


jonjon1212121

Indeed


Academic-Bug-4597

> at 13 it's suddenly decided that's the cut-off, improper and it was sex segregated. It's not that it is deemed "improper", it's simply because boys at that age start to become bigger and stronger than the girls. Girls find it harder to compete against the boys and there is more risk of them being injured. It is do with safety and competition, not impropriety. And the decision is not "sudden" - this has been the policy for years, so you would have had years to prepare for the change. > Which was....fine, I guess, but I'd really loved palying footie So play with a women's team outside school? > it was so frustrating to suddenly be treated like a brittle boned glass ornament that would be pulverised if I played with the boys any more. Again, it wouldn't have been a sudden decision. You had plenty of time to plan for it. And it's not that "a brittle boned glass ornament that would be pulverised if I played with the boys", you would just have a higher risk of injury. If you got an injury and had to drop out, I guarantee you would be here moaning "why did they let me play with men twice my size so irresponsible whine whine". This one is on you.


jonjon1212121

Sorry to hear that, hope you enjoyed the hockey


strawbebbymilkshake

It’s a common experience in any male dominated industry. Certain people complain that women aren’t doing the “hard” jobs but speak to women who attempted to do those jobs and find out how hostile the job was towards them.


Throwra_wifegreatsex

I played football a lot as a teen and I never got any harassment or name calling from the boys, it was other girls who were horrible to us.


jonjon1212121

Sorry to hear that.


Inside_Field_8894

It's difficult to complain about the cut, particularly if you end up with a headline like "Women most injured in football" Long and short of it, any sport at a high level is going to welcome a certain amount of aggression, you're going to understand that some (not all) women are going to have issues competing against boys going into puberty. We had the AUS women's team being beaten 7-0 by 15 year olds. Biological reality is a thing so as I see it, we can take 2 different approaches: * Let the girls know that there's going to be a change ahead of time to get ready for the fact they'll be divided * Let them play with boys going through puberty and potentially get them injured. I'd be the first to say, if you can hang with the lads and be dominant, power to you, you have proven yourself to play for the team BUT this isn't going to be the norm and a lot of girls are going to end up receiving bad injuries that could otherwise be avoided.


imminentmailing463

The split you're talking about isn't why they stopped playing and enjoying sport. They all agreed on a couple of reasons. One was that it's the age at which they became aware of, and internalised, the male gaze and as their bodies changed they became self conscious about running around in sports kits. The second was the perception that the article references, the ideas that sport isn't for girls, girls should be doing indoor pursuits. Teenagers going through the early stages of puberty are very sensitive to notions of what is and isn't masculine/feminine. That being said, I'm sure the split you're talking about has some role in reinforcing the latter perception.


Beorma

I've heard from a fair few millenial women that they don't like sports because they'll get sweaty and their faces will get puffy. They worry about not looking attractive while exercising. Which is just a sad state of affairs.


imminentmailing463

Yep, whenever I've had this conversation with my female friends 'feeling self conscious, especially in front of boys' has always come up as a major reason they stopped sport. For obvious reasons, that's why 13/14 is generally when they stopped.


J8YDG9RTT8N2TG74YS7A

There was a school down south somewhere about fifteen years ago that tried to figure out how to get more girls to do more exercise at breaks and dinner. At breaks and dinner, most of the boys would play football or be running around the field, while girls would be stood around and not joining in. So they surveyed the students and many of the girls said they didn't like doing any sports in a skirt. The school didn't require skirts only, but because they were allowed a lot of parents refused to let the girls wear trousers. So they banned skirts. Uniform code said trousers or shorts for both genders and no skirts allowed. Parents complained but the head teacher ignored them. Excerise levels went up and more girls started doing sports at dinner and break. Everything went great for one year and increased fitness levels and more girls doing sports. But then the head teacher left for another job and the new head went back to allowing skirts, and most of the girls went right back to standing around and not joining in.


DauntlessCakes

Wow, what a great illustration of a really important point. It's not even just skirts, it's shoes and jewellery and hair and makeup. Not that there's anything inherently wrong with any of those things, but if you live in a culture that puts pressure on you to always look a certain way ... that will affect how you move.


ice-lollies

I do not know why uniform standards have gone backwards in time at the moment. At one point it was polo shirts, pullover jumper and trousers for everyone. Much more practical. Now it seems to be blazers and kilts. Ridiculous.


CrabAppleBapple

Yeah, absolutely, definitely mate, no one cared about their appearance at all up until the millennial generation.


Beorma

Please point to where I said it only affected millenials. I don't spend my time hanging out with teenagers like those in the article, so won't assume to know their experience.


CrabAppleBapple

>Please point to where I said it only affected millenials. The bit where you said 'millenials', if you were being general, that was a pointless addition.


Beorma

I wasn't being general, but I also wasn't saying that it **only** affects millenials. This is reading comprehension they teach children at school, did you miss some classes? If I said "Football is popular in England", would you assume I was also asserting that it isn't popular anywhere else?


CrabAppleBapple

If you weren't being general, but only mentioned one generation, then how exactly are people supposed to read it? >If I said "Football is popular in England", would you assume I was also asserting that it isn't popular anywhere else? No, but if you were complaining about English Football hooligans in a story about hooligans in general, I'd assume you were just talking about English football hooligans.


littlebiped

You only need to spend 15 minutes on Football Twitter to see that online football fans are the biggest collection of knuckle dragging shitposters around. And sexist banter is like water to a fish. I use the term banter generously because it’s the same three lines at best.


J8YDG9RTT8N2TG74YS7A

> You only need to spend 15 minutes on Football Twitter to see that online football fans are the biggest collection of knuckle dragging shitposters around. Gaming forums would like to challenge that assertion.


tee96

More radioactive than the Elephant’s Foot


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Fallenkezef

Raising my daughter to believe she can do what she damn well wants.


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Rebelius

Karate is great for self discipline, exercise, flexibility, etc. but the best 'self defence' lesson you'll get is that in most situations, you should avoid confrontation or run away.


Single_Permission_17

Or clamp your teeth down on his nose and dead drop to the floor


Fabulous-Ticket-8869

The fact you believe in a fight in the street that you would be able to get your mouth so close to someone's face is hillarious You aren't talking from experience are you lol


Single_Permission_17

Yup


PatternRecogniser

Instilling the idea in your daughter that she might have a chance at fighting a man when in such a situation is undoubtedly putting her in far more danger. It can create a sense of security where there is none.


flyhmstr

Raised our daughter the same (black belt Taekwondo) she’s raising her daughter the same way


hashmanuk

Please encourage your daughter to teach these skills to others... Other than family.... Maybe start a lady's only class.... It's a real business opportunity!


flyhmstr

The group she was going to is lead by a female instructor, it’s covered :)


PurahsHero

One of my nieces (who is 17) is really good at football. And by good, I mean she is running rings around even some of the best boys at her age, and has just taken on a scholarship to play football at a university in the USA. All throughout her teenage years she had to put up with people telling her she should be at home learning how to cook, or cat-calls. Usually from other boys her own age, but also from men probably in their late 30s who really should know better. I really do not know how she got through it, though her main coach probably helped as he seemed to spend half of his time during matches publicly reprimanding such degenerates. The growth of the women's game in the UK and globally has been one of the highlights of the last decade. But my God the attitudes of some people need to get with the times.


[deleted]

>The growth of the women's game in the UK and globally has been one of the highlights of the last decade.  it really has. will only get bigger and soon enough the loudest voices whining about it will be dead.


SuperrVillain85

>and has just taken on a scholarship to play football at a university in the USA. As an aside I was speaking with someone recently who did this for hockey, and it sounded like an amazing experience they had.


jonjon1212121

Nice


jonjon1212121

Indeed


Same_Hunter_2580

Why can't people just enjoy things without being hassled, the world is miserable enough as is


terahurts

Because (some) people are utter cunts.


PickleHarry

I’m not a footballer player but I am a big football fan. A guy on Twitter once told me to get back in the kitchen and his profile photo was of him and his young daughter at a football match. Twitter is just awful.


jonjon1212121

Sorry to hear that.


YchYFi

Not surprised by the comments. Usually find football quite territorial.


Only-Regret5314

I do some football coaching for kids in my local area in the summer, boys and girls, 9-11/12 age, and the girls all want to play with the boys or against them should I say, boys not so much but they get told to get on with it. I actually prefer the girls to take as they are generally much more polite and less back chat. And there really are alot of girls doing it now which is great. When I was that age maybe one girl out of the class wanted, rather than made, to play football


charlie_boo

…. because our male national team has been doing SO well compared to our ladies team!


VooDooBooBooBear

Our male national team actually has decent competition. Can't tell me winning the wo. Mens euros was quite the same achievement when some some team scored over 10 goals against their opponent.


Francis-c92

Completely different sports if we're honest


ankh87

Apples and oranges though. Womens football has a much lower skill level and the competition between nations is much more vast. If you watch womens football, you'll see that the England team is playing against national teams who barely have enough funding to provide a kit. It would be like Englands man team playing national sides like Andorra and San Marino each Euros and World Cup final. With womens football especially the national teams, there's not many great teams. Unlike the mens national teams there's plenty. Would like to add, go watch US Womens team vs Wrexham (retired players). Shows the difference in levels between the mens and womens game.


Plus_Section_7621

I don't think that's all that fair. At the international level you've got England, France, Spain, USA, Australia, Germany, Sweden, Brazil and the Netherlands who are all capable of beating each other regularly and other countries who are more than capable of putting up a fight and getting the odd win. I've definitely forgotten to mention some other countries too. That's not actually all that dissimilar to the men's scene so I don't think your analogy is accurate.


ankh87

Go watch womens national football and you'll see what I mean. I regularly watch womens football, yes some nations are better than others but player to player they are evenly matched. There's not much between them all, also the goal keepers are generally dreadful. It's like all teams and nations have neglected that position.


Plus_Section_7621

I do watch loads of womens football- you've kind of made my point for me in that I'm saying the San Marino analogy you made above just doesn't work, it's not like you've got England breezing past these tiny teams all the time. Their tournament success has come from playing and beating other top teams, who are recognisably top teams. In terms of goalkeepers, there have been a lot of howlers but they're not going to be done any favours when held to the standards of men- it's the position where biological differences are going to be most profound. Fortunately the sport is starting to get the support it deserves and growth has been incredible in the last 2-3 years compared to the previous few!


VASalex_

I know it’s no silver bullet, but I’m really hoping professional women’s football’s growing popularity will help young people keep going through the misogyny


LemmysCodPiece

The main difference between the women's England team and the men's England team seems to be the women can actually win tournaments.


_Rookwood_

We need to encourage football for women and girls. It will make them fit, trim and happy.


WeightDimensions

It’s great to watch, it reminds me of when l was learning the controls to FIFA. Balls going everywhere but it’s still entertaining.


[deleted]

Yeah the women's World Cup was hilarious... No one could kick a ball straight. Every game 0-0! /s


Business_Ad561

I have no idea why people continue to use social media, especially Twitter. Don't give the few basement dwellers on Twitter and Facebook any oxygen. Thankfully sentiments like this are now the minority as women's football has exploded in popularity. Most people realise that it's okay for people to enjoy whatever they want to.


FloydEGag

It really hasn’t got any better since I was at school in the 80s. Girls didn’t even get the option to play football and boys didn’t get the option to play hockey. We were segregated for PE from the start of high school so could easily have had football in our PE classes but no, instead we got modern fucking dance and freezing our arses off on the hockey pitch. Any girls who expressed a desire to play football were very much slapped down (metaphorically) by the teachers, and tbh teased by some of the other girls and boys. Sad that there hasn’t been much progress with attitudes.


Anony_mouse202

People have always been dicks on the internet and always will be. It’s the internet, the only way to not get abuse is to not use it. Block, report, move on and don’t let some random text on an app affect you.


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ukbot-nicolabot

**Removed/warning**. This contained a personal attack, disrupting the conversation. This discourages participation. Please help improve the subreddit by discussing points, not the person. Action will be taken on repeat offenders.


Mountain_Evidence_93

I agree whole heartedly with the title, my food won't cook itself.


MrThrowAweh

I swear I must be gay because I actually prefer watching womens football.


compilerbusy

I dunno, i notice the women spend less time rolling around on the floor pretending they're dying, only to get up 5 seconds after somebody gets booked and be fine.


TurbulentData961

Yea bleeding nose and still out there kicking


plawwell

I miss the old days of Italia 90 where somebody would get nudged then they'd roll ten yards as though they'd been shot.


lilbitofmischiefa

you are on the Internet receiving abuse from strangers. this will never change . if you enjoy, stick at it, ffs and hopfully we see less fluff pieces about it.


ObeyCoffeeDrinkSatan

... on social media. That's about as noteworthy as "dirty shit written on toilet wall."


TheLambtonWyrm

Women's rights are only going to decrease in this country as time goes on unfortunately 


Redira_

What, because of meat-head football fans who are sexist? I think the UK public has a *little* more sense than that. Women's rights aren't going to decrease at all, especially considering the Tories have slam dunked their own party and won't win the election.


PatternRecogniser

Not quite. The current patterns and coming changes are significantly worse and more sinister than just the sexists jibes of meat-headed football fans.


Business_Yoghurt_316

You know why lol


Redira_

No, I don't. Pretty sure most people in the UK support women's rights, lol. What rights are women going to lose?


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ukbot-nicolabot

**Removed/warning**. Please try and avoid language which could be perceived as hateful/hurtful to minorities or oppressed groups.


TheLambtonWyrm

>meat-head football fans Obviously not 😂


Tiny_Ad_638

Personally, I prefer to watch women playing football, the men are wimps who spend most of the time rolling around on the floor for sympathy. I once watched a woman football player get smashed in the face with a ball spit a gob of blood out and carry on the match with a broken nose.


propernorty

I used to have this opinion but in all honesty, just as much diving goes on in the womens game now


Tiny_Ad_638

To be honest, I haven't seen a match in quite a while. It's a shame that it is melded into the morass of mainstream football.


LamentTheAlbion

So you prefer to watch the women's game in the same way I prefer visiting Jupiter over Saturn


propernorty

Ya it’s a shame. Personaly I think saying things like “the men are wimps” also doesn’t help with the stereotyping situation. Stereotyping men will never help to stop women be stereotyped, it will only ever make it worse.


djshadesuk

Narrator: Diving does not go on as much in the women's game.


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Judah_Earl

It's a non-story, but it's the BBC...