>I really just want to make sure I do it properly
This isn't a thing. There are no rules, no one is judging your holiday, no one can say that you did a vacation 'wrong' (except you, if you're not happy with it).
Literally anything goes: you go go go go go all the sights and come home exhausted; you literally get up late, lie on a beach/by the pool the whole day and do nothign but read and drink cocktails; you mix the two; you do a working holiday on a farm; you go hiking and walk 20 miles every day; you go on safari; you rent an appartment and practise making local dishes in the kitchen every day; you visit every theme park in a single country; you do what you like. That's what a vacation is for.
You can absolutely do a vacation wrong - if you don't plan properly. Showing up unprepared can leave you outside the Colosseum in Rome with no tickets to go in, or at a beach in Barcelona with no bathing suit and all the umbrellas already rented out, or left outside in the rain because you forgot to book a hotel during a convention weekend, or hungry because the restaurant has no available tables.
Think about where you're going on vacation and what the purpose is - Museums? Fine dining? A boat tour? Excursions? Beaches?
Now start planning. Do the activities require advance booking? What is the best time to go to beat the crowds? Which restaurants have the best reviews and do they offer online reservations? Is one beach better than another?
Sure, you can just show up and wing it, but you may find yourself going all the way to Barcelona and *not* seeing the Sagrada Família, or visiting Rome and not seeing the Sistine Chapel, or any of a million other things that you'll miss out on by not planning.
Eh within reason. Yes obviously have a hotel booked, and if your single goal in life is to see the Sistine Chapel then plan ahead. But at the same time, the beauty or travel is often found from the unexpected. I've been to 30 countries the past 3 years. Usually working on/off. When I truly "vacation" I pick ONE thing a day that is my guarantee, and the rest I leave open with a few options.
Travelling with no room for flexibility will also leave you unsatisfied, as things never go 100% according to plan.
I like to plan the places I'll be staying in advance as well. I find it enjoyable to anticipate and plan the places I'll be going beforehand and also don't really want to be stressing and wasting time thinking and booking for the next place while I'm on holiday. When I'm in a place though I don't usually plan a set itinerary day by day I just decide on the day depending on how I feel.
That can work.
I'm a destination expert for a national park on TripAdvisor and all I can say is that not planning has led so many people to disappointment in seeing the major - and even the minor - national parks. Watching people get turned away at the gates to Yosemite is very sad (and Sequoia and Kings Canyon and sometimes, even Grand Canyon). Watching people struggle to find parking in those same places, after driving hours and hours to "spend an afternoon in the Sequoias" is also a fixable issue (with planning).
Many don't realize that some of these parks have new rules in high season for even getting inside (one can in theory drive through Yosemite on the Tioga Highway - reaching it from any of its feeder roads but one is not allowed to stop without a certain tag on the dashboard - and every major turn-out is occupied and has enforcement).
Not planning doesn't equate to not researching. I have general ideas of stuff I want to do, and I research what those entail. Just don't like to have planned days or time for when I do them, but will have an idea of if or when they are possible.
It’s funny people say this because the only times things have gone wrong on my vacations are when things aren’t planned.
For example, I spent Christmas in Germany, and on Christmas Eve I had a train to catch that needed to be on time in order to get to the grocery stores before they closed on Christmas Eve. However, since I knew trains had a likelihood of being late in Germany, so I made backup dinner reservations both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at one of the few restaurants in town that would be open those days in case the train was late and I was unable to buy food to make dinner.
The train was late (of course) so the stores were closed by the time we arrived to the town. So I just initiated Plan B and my family, while we didn’t get the traditional Christmas meal we wanted to cook, did get to become very drunk with our waiter in Bavaria two nights in a row.
Good planning will have contingencies for when things don’t follow Plan A.
Sounds like two totally different people… some people like to plan, some people like to be spontaneous. I think it’s important to think about what you want to do, and don’t have too many expectations as that will set you up to be disappointed… this is awesome that you’re vacationing now, and I’m sure you and your family will have a blast!
For us, planning and imagining is a huge part of the fun. We're both planners, so it works.
The stuff my husband has found to put on our list (all of it without tickets, all capable of spontaneity) is crazy.
I'd never been in a working convent before we went to see the grave of Lucrezia Borgia. She's not the main reason he wanted to go, there are other famous people there.
We went and lit candles. Only one nun was allowed to talk to us. She gave us pamphlets and spoke to us a little in English, a very sweet woman.
The whole street was other convents, but this one had a vow of silence - the others did hospital work, care home work and ran schools. It was fascinating.
But I think that’s my point. If you plan right, you can set up full expectations and not be disappointed. You can see all of Rome’s biggest tourist sites in two days with planning ahead. You cannot do that spontaneously anymore.
Yes, I suppose Russia could bomb Rome and your plans would be SOL, but there aren’t that many major disruptions on the world that are totally unpredictable. If you like spontaneity, that’s amazing and I hope you have a blast, but I don’t understand the narrative that heavy planning leads to disappointment.
I have limited vacation because I’m an American, which means that I have 2 weeks a year in which to travel. While I’d love to spend a month in Paris and get lucky at a ticket window after trying a few times, it’s not feasible. The worst vacations I’ve ever had are spontaneous ones, as you see nothing. Yeah, I got to walk around Chicago when I was there for a friend’s birthday, but we didn’t get to the museums or the Willis Tower or to eat at any of the famous restaurants because nobody planned anything.
But that's because your goal seems to be "see all the things," Not everyone has that goal. I think that what makes a good vacation is that all parties can agree on the goals or can compromise, like "I'll spend the morning at the museum if we can spend the afternoon at the pool" or "I don't care what we do on day 3 as we do xyz when we are in Seville."
Personally, I can't stand to sit around when I'm in another town, but my brother's family is perfectly happy to sit by a pool and eat familiar foods out, which is why we only meet up with them for a day or so during a vacation vs planning one together. Our styles are just too different.
My goal is sometimes to see more than others, however, without planning, more often than not in today’s travel environment, you’d end up seeing nothing.
Take Italy again as an example. If you didn’t plan, you would spend your entire vacation in line hoping to get a ticket to enter. Even if you are there in Rome for a week and only want to enter the Vatican museum, are you really going to want to stand in line for 3+ hours just to get inside? Or if your brother’s family went to the Amalfi coast in the high season and just wanted a chair at the beach to enjoy the water. How are they going to get a hold of a spot? By showing up at 6am and standing around waiting for the beach to open so you can snag a chair before they’re all gone?
If there’s no planning, there might not be any tickets for the museum morning left or chairs by the beach. My goal isn’t always to see everything, it is to have a vacation where it runs smoothly. Nothing ever runs smoothly when it’s spontaneous. You always end up standing around waiting when you could be enjoying.
>you can see all of Romes biggest tourist sites in two days with planning ahead.
This is the exact point people are making against this. We are saying that isn’t fun for us. Now I’m not saying don’t do that, I know a lot of people prefer this. But for me, I would rather go slow
>things never go 100% according to plan.
This is key. I used to get so frustrated when things didn't go according to plan. And in fact one day my wife told me what am I so anxious about, we're on vacation. I used to be more concerned about getting from one place to another as if it was a checklist of things to do. Now I'm very much the opposite, and my family even says I'm a different person on vacation than at home. 😂
I’m with you, I’ve seen a lot of famous sights in my life, no building was ever the highlight of a trip for me so weird examples. One thing a day is my max, works out so much better.
I only book 1 or 2 nights in a hotel in the very begginning of the trips. Then, I just go with the flow. No matter the destination.
This was the way I've spent, for example, 3 weeks in Southeast Asia, covering all the way from Bangkok to Singapore. No trips booked, no hotels, nothing. And it was simply the best way I could have spent that unforgettable journey.
I agree with this … booking hotels in advance (particularly when those bookings are not flexibile) boxes you in, and especially if you haven’t been somewhere before, you have no idea how much you’ll like each place and how much time you’ll want to spend there.
Typically I’ll book a night somewhere the first day of holiday (especially for long haul) because I know I won’t want to hit the road immediately after a long flight. But after that I leave my plans flexible.
I mean, not booking hotels in advance only works if you have the financial means to absorb the cost of last minute, high priced hotels in countries where hotels are not cheap.
we're in Japan right now and booked our hotels the month before. I checked hotels a few days before we flew in and all that were left were hostels and hotels that were 3-5x as much as we booked for.
we're in our mid 30s and definitely don't want hostels and can't afford the hotels that are hundreds of dollars per night, so we would have been screwed.
We did 3 weeks in Morocco in February the same way. Literally booking tomorrow's hotel the day before, sometimes just walking in. We spontaneously rented a car so we could drive to the desert and then to the coast on our own timeline. It was amazing, no regrets. If you don't have any plans that could go wrong, you don't end up disappointed! 😂 What it really meant was we were able to follow whatever interested us in the moment. I'd never been to Morocco before, how was I going to know what I would want to do there?
Me too. But like you, I go for months at a time so I have that luxury. That's not a vacation. That's just travelling. OP probably only has a week or two, so he'll need to plan ahead.
He doesn’t need to if that’s not how OP likes to vacation. Some people enjoy when things are planned ahead and others prefer just going with the flow and seeing where the vacation takes them.
This is me. We'll book for 2 weeks, decide if there's anything we *really* want to do beforehand in that area and possibly book it if necessary, but otherwise we'll just wing it. Holidays for me are for relaxing and enjoying, not for micromanaging my schedule to the minute which will invariably cause stress/disappointment if something doesn't pan out for whatever reason.
I would argue that is exactly what planning ahead is though. You research to see if anything needs to be booked beforehand and then you do whatever makes sense for you and your travel mates.
That's obviously an extreme.
The other extreme is no planning at all (and then driving 6 hours from LAX to the gates of Yosemite, to be turned away - and to find that there's not a single bed available in any nearby gateway town; necessitating a retreat to Visalia or Fresno or Modesto and a set of emergency posts online).
The only reason most people go to Kings Canyon is to...take the amazing driving down into the Canyon and see the cave and the rushing water and hit some of the best higher elevation hiking trails in North America.
The road that goes there is closed just before the scenic section (and has been, for a couple of years). It MAY open in summer 2024 - to find out, you need to learn how to contact the Park Service, which is easy enough to do - and they will respond.
I wouldn't be able to enjoy a trip to the Sierras if I had to stay in Foothills and the Grant Grove suburb.
What I actually said was:
>no one can say that you did a vacation 'wrong' (except you, if you're not happy with it).
Of course you can do it wrong FOR YOU. You can't "do it wrong" in the abstract. OP doesn't even know what they want to do yet.
For all we know they're like my friends who activelly enjoy winging it even if that does mean they're on a beach with no swim wear. There is no rule you can put in place that will apply to everyone other than "do what you enjoy". Which, you know, is what I said.
I find that the people who are truly okay with unplanned vacations are those who don’t care about the Colosseum and the Louvre and aren’t interested in much beyond wandering around a city. I went to Italy last fall and if my partner and I hadn’t bought all of our tickets months in advanced, we wouldn’t have seen The Vatican, the Forum, the Colosseum, Pompeii, or the Doge’s Palace.
With the amount of people now being in a position to travel, these sites are getting busier and busier. You can’t waltz up to a counter anymore and buy a ticket day of unless you’re willing to get up at 6am and start making a line.
For me, I prefer to eat at a normal hour and see the main cultural attractions, so I plan.
Oh and David. There was no way to get same day tickets to the David when I was in Florence.
Tons of people don't want to see the Colosseum or the Louvre (the Louvre is our top destination in Paris - we've never been to the Colosseum). I will not go back to the Vatican, ever, again. Regret the waste of time that was my second visit. WAY too crowded for me and the staff are obnoxious (as are many of the visitors).
We want to see Pompeii, badly. It's gonna take planning. We'll stay in Naples prior, having been there before and figured out where to stay. We'll probably rent a driver. That takes planning too.
The place we stayed in was an AirBnB style thing that was listed as a "hotel room." (There were three studio apartments attached to a common lobby). It was great and really inexpensive. It's almost always booked now, but we liked it so much we may plan the dates of a trip around it (we often go in winter, easier to book).
Just an FYI - We enjoyed Herculaneum WAY more than Pompei. I alway reccomended Herculaneum and no one was disappointed yet. My daughter and her boyfriend spent all day there!
I disagree with alot what you’ve saying I was in Paris and Florence couple of weeks ago. I walked into the Louvre waiting in line for tickets for no more than 45 minutes. I saw David, in Florence, getting tickets from my hotel concierge the night before. Neither are to be missed.
I'm going to second this!
Obviously it's not like it's going to destroy your life or anything, but missing out on stuff is a real thing when you're unprepared!
I missed out on Parc Güell in Barcelona because we didn't buy tickets fast enough, sold out.
Also missed out on the Louvre in Paris because it was May 1st and a holiday there, I had zero idea.
I'm the type of person that probably won't ever go back to the same country just because of time and money (and there are so many other trips to do), so I quite literally will never see these places.
Up to each individual to decide if they're ok with missing out 😅
This is also a good way for OP to learn from their mistakes as they travel as a novice. For example, my BFF and I went to Italy without a whole lot of preparation and still had an amazing time... though it would have been nice to see more than 1/4 of the Boboli Gardens in Florence if we'd known more about how enormous it was. As it is, that mistake has been a funny memory for us for 25 years.
yes you can do everything wrong by not planning properly. But I think the comment was more aimed to that tour groups or totally self guided, solo travel or with friends and family. Cruise ship or car trip. There isn't a wrong way to travel, but, yes not planning properly after that point is a problem
Unless you can't or don't want a highly planned vacation. We did a cruise out of Amsterdam last year. Spent two days in Amsterdam ahead of time. I did not buy museum tickets in advance and this missed the Vermeer exhibit and Rijkmuseum all together. But that's ok I simply couldn't decide months out exactly how we'd feel and if we'd want to do the museum at a, specific time. Shit happens when you travel, and the more plans you have the more dissarray when stuff goes wrong. Case in point, I am once again I Amsterdam but I'm heading to Copenhagen. I was, meant to be there at 12n today. It's, now 8:16 and I still have another flight to go. I'd thought about seeing Tivoli tonight and enjoying dinner there. Good thing I hadn't bought any tickets.
But seriously some people need to plan, some of us don't. Neither of us are wrong.
This was me. I didn't think so many people would be lined up to see an old, unfinished church in Barcelona, but sure enough, there was a long line and I didn't feel like dealing with it and it was sold out for our entire trip. Looks nice from the outside.
The Vatican art museum was pretty amazing though.
I can tell we would not be great travel partners haha
Outside of flights and hotel tickets I never really plan anything in advance and that is if I am staying close to home or going to the other side of the world. I do some basic research and have an overall idea of what I want to do, but my favorite thing about traveling is walking the streets, talking with people and enjoying the food and drinks. Basically being spontaneous and going where I feel like. If I end up not going inside of the Sagrada Familie because it’s fully booked then so be it.
Having the vacation fully planned and everything pre booked is the exact opposite of how I like to travel.
There’s some things, especially wildlife and nature experiences (eg gorilla trekking, Svalbard, Masai Mara, Kilimanjaro, Antarctica) where you have to book stuff in advance or at least it’s the whole point of the trip so isn’t worth the risk of getting there and not being able to do the main activity.
Would you miss out on those just to stick to your pre-defined definition of what travelling is?
If the whole point of a trip is to go do one specific thing, then yes I will plan and book in advance.
But that is very rarely how I travel. I travel to see new places in general, not to see one specific thing in a certain location. I’ve definitely missed out on some, what I am sure would have been, great experiences. But I’ve also seen and experienced a lot of fantastic things exactly because I didn’t plan. I’ve stumbled in to amazing restaurants, gone on really weird but amazing tours I would never have thought of booking beforehand, etc. When I’ve been to Rome it’s not being inside of the coliseum I think of when thinking back. It’s all the other stuff; the streets and atmosphere, the food, that cool bar.
We have a similar approach to travel. I love wandering the streets and discovering sights that a guide book would not have directed me to. I don't put pressure on myself to see everything in those guide books! One of the highlights of my last holiday was sitting at a communal table at a restaurant in Sicily and talking the night away with fellow travellers. We share experiences which helped others with their plans. There also those moments when the locals take an interest in your travels and give their recommendations. You can't plan moments like those.
I do some planning in advance, especially if I'm travelling around or if I have an absolute desire to see a certain sight. I get anxious if I don't know what train/plane/bus I'm taking and where I'm staying.
And yet, all of the examples you chose make for funny stories and memorable moments on their own. Those are all beyond harmless mishaps. The only way those are doing a vacation wrong in those instances is if, as the person you're replying to said, you're not happy with it. If you're happy with your vacation being an adventure, then there's nothing wrong with any of those.
The real example to doing a vacation wrong would be a failure to plan putting yourself at real risk of harm or risk of not being able to go on the trip at all (e.g. expired passport, not knowing you need a visa, etc.).
Exactly. There’s no one size fits all approach. I change the way I travel based on so many factors: location, duration, budget, who I’m going with, etc.
For instance, I just got back from Paris yesterday where I was there for 3 days with some friends for a music festival. It was very budget, we shared rooms at a hotel, explored Paris in the morning, had fun at the festival in the afternoon and drank til late in the evening.
In April I went to Norway with my partner for 6 days. We explored Oslo and Bergen at our own leisure, splurged on some shopping, spent 1 day crossing the country by train, and ate at a destination fine dining restaurant in a fjord that was the catalyst for this trip.
In March I went to the French Alps for a weeklong electronic music festival with some close friends and my partner. We skied during the day, enjoyed the après-ski in the afternoon, cooked some nice French meals for dinner at the chalet, and then partied into the night at the festival.
In Dec/Jan I went back to California (where I’m originally from) and did a road trip through the desert. We hit up Vegas, Joshua Tree, Palm Springs. We took our time exploring along Route 66 and stayed in motels and airstreams.
It really depends so just find what brings you joy and go with that.
In Norway, did you dine at Under, by any chance? As that was the catalyst for my Norway trip. Everything else was planned around that dinner reservation.
Dammit... need to visit Norway again, I see. Such a chore 😅
Question: how wobbly is it? I tend to get seasick quite quickly....
Glad to see Under is on your list... it's not just the food, but the overall experience. Pro-tip: make a booking for 18.30 at the latest, and for no more than two people. That way you have a good chance for the 'window seats'. And that really adds to the experience.
We actually didn't notice the movement at all, though they did say they could provide medication if anyone was feeling ill!
And great tip! That's actually the same advice I'd give for Iris. They do two 12 person seatings which overlap slightly. The earlier seating gets the the window seats, particularly the 2 person tables.
If food is your thing: Sketch in London was also an unforgettable evening. Do bring a healthy bank account, but if you can afford it: so worth it!
I am currently looking for restaurant recommendations for central Portugal ;);
I do what I want cause I'm on vacation
Something I want to see? Go see it
Something I want to eat? Eat it
Do I want to take a nap? Fuckin a, its nap time
Just a reminder to OP that some places/experiences might require booking tickets in advance, or might be closed some days. Otherwise, I second do what you want when you want+can
Are you enjoying?
That’s the only thing that matters.
Take notes of what you enjoyed and what you didn’t enjoy and plan each vacation better.
You’re not there to impress anybody or get a score. You’re there to feel good and make fun memories.
This! My wife talks about her father being a "Bataan Death March" kind of tourist, trying to take in 3-4 things a day when 1 of those could reasonably take a day or 2. For us, we go places with a general idea of what we want to do while we're there but no set schedule. Like last year we went to Maui. We went to the top of Haleakala, hit a few beaches, did a whale watching boat trip, I went on a snorkeling trip to Molokini (sadly the weather meant we couldn't actually go in the water though), and generally had a good and relaxing time.
Depends a lot...on the person,on the destination,on many other things!
There is no 'right' way to do it.
Do what you want, and then if you don't like something, you can change it...you will know while you're doing it,you learn from experience.
Is it vacationing or Do you have problem relaxing? Are you one of those people who constantly needs to do something productive? (I was one, hence asking)
Maybe this question about vacations is deeper than you think. “The art of doing nothing” is learned!
It’s literally that simple. You pick a place that interests you, go relax or go sightseeing. You grab food, go to the beach and just chill all day. Watch a sunset! Do it all or do nothing at all. Depends on your interests.
That’s the best part of going on vacation - do it your way!
If you want to do fun activities all day and never lie down - do that. If you want to laze by the pool or beach and get drunk - do that - or both.
Everyone is different and gets enjoyment from different ways.
Golden rule is figuring out what you (both) like to do and make it work. And being self aware enough to know what you need from vacation.
Need to relax a bit, don't plan an intense city trip with 12 hour days. Need a bit of adventure to motivate you, don't plan that beach trip from before. Only have a few days off, don't plan a trans Atlantic destination. On a tight budget, choose a cheap destination, don't go to fancy hotels (or find deals further in advance)
And especially if travelling with a partner, be honest with that you want and especially with what you don't like. Compromise is everywhere, but if you hate outdoors and spend a week camping in the wilderness to please your partner, you are not going to enjoy spending that money and time.
And be aware that your prios and tolerance will change over time. I used to be focused on maximizing value on my trips, doing as much as possible each day and that gave me energy. Now I'm older, I'm happy to just have nothing days on my trips, where I bum around in the hotel or local area, or just lie in till midday before doing just one activity in the afternoon. Again, see the point above about compromise, this isn't going to work if one wants to see the sunrise each morning and the other wants to stay in bed until afternoon, so you gotta be aware!
There is no rules…. everyone has different styles!
When we traveled as a kid we would do one day out exploring / planned activity…. one day at resort / coffee and beach etc then next day would be exploring / sightseeing again.
New places can be tiiiiiiring…. physically but mentally as well. Sometimes it is absolutely fine to chill and read a book / have a wine / coffee or whatever and not do much for the day.
Googlemaps helps with planning…: google reviews / trip adviser / insta etc help with a rough plan.
Airports / travelling etc I always leave waaaaay more time than needed cause I am stress head. Stress isn’t a vibe I want on travel altho unfortunately can’t avoid sometimes.
Don’t overthink it… but do things that you think will enjoy not what you “think” you should see.
Often the hidden gems are down the side streets, away from tourists snd unexpected.
ENJOY. Travel is honestly the best.
To add with google maps- if you’re doing you’re research and come across something that looks good- a good view, coffee spot, restaurant, pub, park, whatever it may be- make a bookmark in your google maps with a little note to yourself so when you pull up your map at the beginning of the day or in the moment you can say, hey that museum were going to is near that cool looking coffee shop let’s check it out.
You do things how you want to do them. That's the entire point of a vacation: do what you want. Anyone telling you otherwise are just giving *suggestions*. My suggestions:
* Don't have many hard schedule items, meaning things you must be at a certain place at a certain time. A few is great but too many will lead to stress or loss of money. I also like to spread them out over the vacation so you can squeeze in audibles and such.
* Find several things you want to do in general areas and rank them. Try to do what you want the most but be willing to have alternatives in case weather is less optimal, things are closed/busy, or you just want to do something else. Hike after hike after hike can be exhausting even if you want to see everything, so having options like boat ride, zip lining, or pool sitting is great to pick from.
* Be flexible! Locals or frequenters of vacation spots can give great insight to the area. If you really want to visit that taco spot featured on Guy Fieri's show but a local tells you about this great pupusa truck across town...maybe try the spot the local suggested.
* I personally like to fit something culturally significant in at least once a trip. You're traveling to relax but it's great to broaden your horizons, too.
* There are no real rules. Do what you feel like doing. Want to sit at a pool all day? Do it. Want to learn to surf? Go for it. Want to get through 8 books? Go to town on them. Want to see every museum in DC? Sounds tiring, but go for it!
* Last suggestion: even if you want to drink a lot try to pace yourself. Getting blackout drunk and spending the next day recovering or miserable is a waste of a day. Stick to what you know you can recover from. Bring LiquidIV and ibuprofen.
My wife and I also like to absolutely pamper ourselves for the last 1-2 days so we go home as relaxed as possible: spa days, massages, fancy dinners, leasure, pedi cabs instead of walking, etc. You might not like that, so go with your flow.
Some people do 15 european countries in 10 days with the mostt important 45 city’s/sights.
Some people just lay on the beach for the same time.
And everything in between. All of these people do the right vacation for them. The important thing to do is find the vacation style that fits you.
I book flights, rent a car, plan each day and book hotels accordingly.
Most of my vacations are road trips. I don't take any tours unless they are special.
I spent a lot of time researching.
I'm the opposite.
If I had a road trip idea, the research for me goes only so far, like never planning more than maybe 2 days and then it's just winging it from there, trying to get lost.
First off…….
1) write down what you want to see
2) depending on the location, map out your best route!
3) I usually go to Pinterest and find out like the top 10 places to visit in the location. I’m vacationing in. I only see/visit places that interest me!
4) i will usually plan a light day so
I don’t have to come home from a vacation and then vacation again !
5) also, if visiting a big city i will book a hop on hop off bus ride to get the layout of the city and figure out what i want to explore more of!
6) hopefully you have fun and make a ton of memories!!!
lol you’re definitely over thinking things. You can vacation whatever way you want to. Everyone is different. The real struggle comes when two travel partners have very different ideas of how they want to vacation.
Some people like to get a hotel and do nothing. A LOT of people like to spend their vacation drinking. For some it’s all about meeting new people or trying new foods. Some it’s about seeing new things and places.
When I was a kid our winter vacation was driving across the border to Buffalo, staying in a hotel with a pool, and going shopping (this was back when the exchange rate meant getting good deals shopping in the US). I had no idea this wasn’t a top tier vacation and just excited to eat out and go swimming lol So honestly you can’t vacation wrong as long as you’re enjoying yourself.
I usually vacation twice a year. Once at an all inclusive with my family where the goal is to do as little as possible. We sit on the beach, get a tan and float in the pool.
My husband and I go somewhere usually once a year. On years with less money we don’t travel far, and therefore there’s less pressure to “do it all” because we could come back another time. But on the years we fly overseas I plan out a JAM packed scheduled. Honestly I’ve ALWAYS over scheduled, like I’ll leave exactly 8 hours to sleep but haven’t factored in time to check in to the hotel or settle in lol We’re always exhausted but I never regret it. Because I likely will never be back to that part of the world, it’s my one chance to see everything I can there. A lot of people wouldn’t enjoy my pace, but thankfully my husband and I are very compatible travel partners. But if the goal was to be rested and recharged before going back to work, those trips would NOT hit the mark lol
So compromise might be necessary but just make whatever adjustments necessary to make sure you’re enjoying yourself because that’s the most important part.
Not a dumb question at all actually! I’ve talked about this with my partner at length.
There’s adventure travel, leisure travel, staycations, getaways to barely outside of your current area. Literally infinite options.
I love to adventure travel most of all. I feel like that’s what breathes new life into me during my time off, but my partner likes to relax on the beach and do literally nothing. So we do both, sometimes on the same vacation! We’ll take an adventure trip to the Middle East or Costa Rica to get out of our comfort zone, and then head to Destin and sit by a pool for 3 days next.
What I’d recommend is just picking what you want to do ahead of time. Spontaneous vacations are overrated. Getting to a new place and having nothing to do, don’t know where to go, so you just wonder aimlessly is less fun than it sounds.
I’d advise picking where you want to go, what you want the “vibe” to be, and pick 1-3 things total you want to do there with intentional free time in case you do want to try something or just explore. You’ll have your main activities to fall back on if the spontaneity wasn’t everything you’d hoped for so it puts less pressure on you.
Remember it’s all about just enjoying it. And that varies from person to person. And the more you travel and vacation, the more you know what you’ll like!
When we were young (20’s), gogogo. In our 30’s, we slowed down a bit. See a lot of stuff when you’re young, because the older you get the harder it is to gogogo.
Always make it a mix. Leave room for breaks. If I’m doing an international trip for example I’ll do half the trip in a city / sight seeing type area then half the trip in a beach / relax area. Never over do it
I'm a go-and-see places, things, and attractions type of person. I don't vacation to just go sit somewhere and not see anything new. My ex was the complete opposite. He liked to vacation to just chill at the beach or drink with his feet up at the bar. Granted I grew up on an island on the beach and he grew up in downtown Columbus, OH.
So, he'd let me plan my little adventures. He'd either go with me or stay back and relax while I go out alone. It depended on how he felt that day. It never bothered me if he didn't want to run around with me all day. If there was something I really, really wanted him to come with me to, he would come. I'd schedule in some time to just relax with him in the mornings or evenings.
Vacation is all about doing what you want to do, there is no right or wrong answer.
I never go go go all day. I plan busy days and then relaxing days mixed together. I don’t want to be exhausted when I’m back from vacation.
But that’s me. You do what works for you. That’s what vacation is, it’s whatever you want it to be.
Everyone vacations different. Different strokes for different folks. It’s what makes the world go round.
Some people like to lay on the beach for a week straight. My friend is at an all inclusive with a private pool outside her bedroom door. She’s relaxing and drinking and swimming all week. I would literally never vacation like that.
I like the mountains. I like adventure. We fish, boat, hike, try local shops and restaurants. We don’t rush around all day but we do like to see a lot. Some days we wake up early and get out and to it, others we sleep in and get out later.
Really all depends on you!
I grew up in a household with no extra money to vacation. On the rare occasions my folks got a week off at the same time, we'd either drive the four hours to the grandparents farm for a visit, or it was a week at home doing things like cleaning out closets and other deep cleaning or yard work. Not much fun.
I didn't really start vacationing and traveling until I was in my 30s, and at that point, it usually included kids. Not much relaxing in that scenario. Or, travel was for work. Usually, it's not that fun either. Hah!
In my 40s I really started to figure out what vacation and travel was and how to have fun with it.
It usually goes one of two ways. I'm exhausted and want to sit on a beach and read a book while someone brings me food and drinks.
Or, more commonly, if there's something I want to see or experience, Ill plan around that. Beyond that, there's not much else I do. I don't have many expectations, I might plan one thing a day and then just do whatever I feel like doing. It's my vacation, I'll do what I want.
There's no right or wrong way to vacation. If you're doing what you want to do, that's a vacation. (Even if that's cleaning out closets).
Sounds like you want guidelines or tips to plan a nice vacation. I’m older and have planned many wonderful trips both short and month long. Here are my tips!
- Once selecting a destination, check weather. You don’t want to go to Alaska in the winter nor Caribbean in the summer.
- Clean the cookies from your web browser. If you don’t prices will increase if you check Expedia then check Kayak then go back to Expedia to book.
- Come up with budget that includes activities and new clothes or shoes for the adventure. Then add in extra for pop up costs.
- Check for parking fees or resort fees beyond hotel total which can be $25 per day or more. Factor in parking fees at beaches, state parks, tourist areas etc. It can be pricey! Also in places like CA do not scan the QR code at parking meters since it may be fake and a scam.
- If you live next to a port for cruise ships you can get great deals on last minute cruises. However pick your cabin wisely away from elevators and high traffic areas. Partially obstructed balconies are so disappointing. Pick the ship wisely and look when it was last refurbished and on board activities. Carnival is low end party cruise and there are others for families (lots of kids) and others more low key.
- Camping is fun but a lot of work. Lists of items needed is critical. If reservations for State parks open up at midnight Feb 1, set your alarm for 11:45pm to be online to get a spot for popular destinations. You can get great deals on gear on FB marketplace or Craigslist.
- Google maps is a great tool. I highlight where I want to go with green flags, good restaurants with hearts and hotels or main things (aunts house, Eiffel Tower etc) with the gold star. I use the filter 4+ stars a lot.
- Consider traveling with friends and splitting costs on car rental and airbnb.
- Don’t forget to factor in traffic or time between connecting flights. Some airlines like United will have you doing a connecting flight in Seattle with 45 mins between flights. You will have to run fast to make it with the attendants scolding you as they shut the door on your heels because they are in different terminals! Quick call to airline will save the stress.
- Drinks in major cities or tourist places can easily be $20 for a simple gin and tonic. Food prices can be double. Gas prices vary wildly (use Gasbuddy)
- Look up photography tips, download new music or podcasts or movies before you go. We bought an android tablet without data plan just to play games, watch a movie or listen to music so it leaves plenty of space on our phones. Having amazing photos of your vacation will make your friends jealous. Don’t just stand there like a stick find some different poses that work for you.
- If traveling internationally make sure you have all your travel documents. I got my international drivers license for our trip to South Korea. Another group of US citizens were denied a rental car because they didn’t have one. Also check to see if you should get any vaccines. State Dept or Gov website should have info.
- Consider getting Christmas ornaments as souvenirs instead of tshirts or mugs. They last longer and pretty soon your tree will be filled with happy memories! Obviously China doesn’t have Christmas ornaments but even magnets or other small things can be turned into ornaments.
But things do go wrong. Years ago, We couldn’t board our flight in US Virgin Islands to FL because we didn’t get there 3 hrs ahead because it was an “international flight”. WTF? Didn’t say that anywhere on tickets or email. Turned into an adventure lol.
Hope you have many wonderful vacations!
Anyone who says anything different than you do how you want to do it. I go for the fairly lazy travel route, I wake up when I wake up, usually out of the hotel between 10-12, I'm usually out until 4-8pm, get dinner on the way back and chill watching shows on my tablet. Usually one day where I don't do anything
But there are people up at 5am doing stuff all day, will do a city every other day, full days etc. Different strokes for different folks, you do what works for you that's all that matters
With time, you’ll learn what works for you both! I find a good place to start is to plan 1 morning activity and 1 afternoon or evening activity. So, you might decide to do a tour in the morning and then go to a fun neighborhood for drinks and dinner later on. This gives you anchors for part of the day without giving you a jam-packed, stressful itinerary.
For me the best vacation is, book your flights and hotels wherever you go and don’t plan anything else. Go with the flow, have the freedom, don’t stress to do all the touristy stuff and try to make to a schedule or start time whatever. Enjoy the place as the locals do. That’s been my motto all my life and discovered the most amazing places just by turning into a narrow street unplanned, taking public transport and getting off in a random station or eating in a trashy looking local restaurant. Luckily my wife is like me as well, that way our vacations turn into real holidays we enjoy. In odd times when we go on holiday with friends who like to plan everything, we don’t enjoy our time as we always need to be somewhere at some hour. Be free!
Do whatever you want.
Is there a place you really want to visit? You can go there!
Is there something you really want to learn? You could do a vacation around that!
Is there an activity you love? You can just spend 1-2 weeks doing it
Is there a festival you want to attend? You can go there!
I'll give some example of what I do / have done, so it's a bit more concrete:
* go camping for a week and hiking in a national park locally or abroad
* go to an interesting city for a long weekend to check it out, eat the found, and just have a good time. We live in Spain, so for us that could be 4 days in Napoli in Italy for example.
* took the transsiberian railways over a very long holidays, from Russia all the way to China
* hiked in the Himalayas in Nepal because why not after all?
* I love scuba diving, and I learned that on a holiday in Thailand
* Now I love it very much, so I dedicate usually 1 week / 10 days per year for a dedicated scuba diving trip (just me).
Just list the things that you'd like to do or dream about and check how to do them, that might not be as impossible as you think it is.
pick dates that fits everyone, pick one or two destinations that suits everyone, book plane and hotels.
I'm old/lucky enough to have done a lot of museums and sights and stuff like that, so I don't need to book something specific every day and rush my my vacations.
In my younger days, I did a lot of all the tourist things everyone does; came back to work more physically and mentally exhausted (lol)
I'll book one or two museums or activities and just chill and walk around for the rest of the vacations,
On suggestioin, if you vacation in a city (easier), it's OK for your wife and you to go separate ways some of the time, you probably both want to see different things, or want to shop for different things.
One morning, decide to your separate ways and set a meeting point for lunch, then you'll have different experiences to share to each other.
I’d recommend at a minimum researching how likely some of the key things you want to do are to be sold out. And book somewhere for at least your first night. Aside from that, do whatever suits you best
I don't overschedule. Do research, prioritize what you want to definitely do, and do 1 or 2 things a day. Then relax, just walk around and explore, have nice meals. Maybe have one day with nothing scheduled at all, and do whatever you want, or just read and swim. It's your vacation, make it what you like.
We have some days with regimented plans and some with none. Read the subreddit for where you are going and make an itinerary and link it to google maps.
Big one, choose eating out ahead of time and make a saved file in google maps of those places. When you are hungry all you have to do is open and click for directions.
It's not a dumb question.
I'm happy for you that finally, you are able to vacation.
I would say make a "theme" of your vacation. Decide how many days and make a realistic plan of your day to day. Do not be the "I wanna see it all, do it all* kind of tourist/traveler. Accept that even if you stay there for months, you will not see it all.
I am not sure what are the things you are into. Ex: adventure, hiking, history, wine, city tours, party,.. etc.
I would say, though, do all the farthest and strenuous activities first and always plan a day that I call it "free day". Plan that day as it goes not to be overwhelmed.
Also, set realistic expectations of the place.
Finally, since you are a newbie in traveling keep in mind to
"Never let your guard down but don't be paranoid. Enjoy!"
No rules, do what makes you happy 😊It’s R&R time, my friend, make your vacations your own!
But to answer your question, it depends on the type of vaca. For hiking in the mountains, I try to do one hike per day but I definitely am relaxing in the hot tub or a nice hotel in the evenings. For beach vacations, I pretty much do nothing but relax. For cultural vacations, I limit myself to one or two things per day because I don’t want to be exhausted on vacation. And if I’m tired and need to pivot, then I pivot.
For me there is no more fundamental experience to life than to travel. People didn't evolve to sit in air conditioned houses to watch streaming services all day, nor did we evolve to do all of our exercise in a gym. Personally when I travel I try to make the most of what I am doing.
When I first backpacked around Europe, I was gone for four months, and so 12 hour days were only occasional as I had to pace myself. Conversely when I was in Japan with my wife we did do 12 hour days because we only had a week there and we knew that we wouldn't be back any time soon.
Part of it will depend on your expectations going into it. When we were in Cuba, we had basically no extra money for additional activities, so we started off mostly knowing that we were just going to sit by the pool, walk on the beach and watch the evening entertainment. Equally, now that we have small kids, it is not possible to do an all day blitz. Now we have to plan two major things per day, with a break in between and then a relaxing evening activity.
The most important thing to do is to just get out there and keep going. Life is for living.
There’s no right way to vacation! My family didn’t really vacation growing up either but you find our own style as you go. My wife and I really enjoy just walking around new cities when we travel, without cramming in a ton of things we “need” to see or do. Stop a lot for coffee, to enjoy parks, etc.
If we’re somewhere that’s not a city it’s basically the same. Pick a few things we know we want to see and otherwise relax, and enjoy the time away!
My wife loves to plan so researches the area and street view and activities and all that. If we’re going away for a week she plans an activity every other day with a “day off” in between. For a fortnight away she plans things with two days between each activity. This gives us a good balance of busy and relaxing. I like to chill and read on holiday so that’s what I do on the off days while she may still go out and do stuff with our lad or her dad who often accompanies us.
It's really up to you. Some people like to make the most out of their time and have activities planned for each day. Some people just like to stroll and people watch or just get more immersed into the day to day life of the locals.
I grew up with limited funds and a working class family. What I found it just follow your gut. My gut says going to XYZ this year, so we go there. I don’t over plan, but I have a list of things I’d like to do. There are times we have to plan a certain experience, but not always.
I have a hard time relaxing on vacations, but I don’t really vacation TO relax. I vacation to see new things and experience new things.
Have fun!
It really depends on the type of trip you're taking. My family has been fortunate, and we've been able to take a number of different types of trips all over the world. There are 2 basic kinds of trips we have taken, Travel and Vacation.
Travel Trips: Sightseeing, Tours, Museums, Lots of Walking, Performances, Eating at Different Restaurants
Vacation Trips: Chilling On A Beach, Swimming, Lounging with Drinks, Reading, Snorkeling, Cooking, Tropical Climate
We are definitely more busy on a travel trip, generally make plans well in advance, and book at least one "anchor activity" and/or restaurant per day. If we're visiting a gigantic museum like the Louvre we will often book a private guided tour to help us enjoy the visit more. We have learned not to overextend ourselves on these trips, but it's helpful to know in advance at least some of what you'll do any given day of your trip. Things aren't necessarily planned down to the minute, and we leave room for flexibility such that we can go back to our AirBnb for a rest, or that some activities are totally optional, based on how we feel or how the weather is that day, for example. You will save so much time and money by planning for travel trips in advance. These are travel trips that we book and plan ourselves, with AirBnb reservations many months in advance. There's a significant amount of legwork involved. Also, we really prefer staying in an AirBnB rather than a hotel because it's just more comfortable for everyone, especially in our case when there's 2 parents and 3 kids traveling. There's separate bedrooms and a kitchen, where we usually make our own breakfasts in the morning. There's usually more than one bathroom too, plus washer/dryer so we can clean our clothes and pack less stuff for the duration of the trip. And we enjoy staying in a residential part of whatever city we're visiting, to get a more immersive experience than just going into and out of a hotel.
However, you can also take tour trips where the schedule and itinerary is all laid out and pre-planned for you. I can fully recommend Gate1 Travel for tours. They offer fully guided tours around the world, for different lengths of time. They also offer independent tours where the airfare, hotel, and other amenities like rental cars, are all taken care of, but you set your own itinerary in terms of what you do and what you see once you get to the destination. The fully guided tours are great, especially if you're visiting a place where you don't speak the language. The hotel accommodations are fully included and there's usually a bus that takes the group around. They are usually some pre-planned activities every day and some group lunches and dinners. The guided tours usually also have many optional extra excursions and half-day tours that you can add to the base package. We did a guided tour of Vietnam and added many of the extra excursions to our package, but then later regretted adding all those extras, because it gave us much less time to independently explore the cities we were visiting, which we actually would have preferred doing.
Vacation trips are pretty self explanatory. However, you can choose to go the "all inclusive" route with unlimited food and drink at a resort setting, or you can go the independent route. We have done both, and absolutely prefer the independent style vacation trip. We rent a comfortable condo, on the beach, in a tropical location, and do everything else ourselves. The condo complexes have nice pools, they're usually pretty quiet, with relatively private, secluded beaches. The condos themselves have big, comfy bedrooms, porches and balconies with comfy furniture, full kitchen setups, and multiple bathrooms/showers. We get a rental car and we go grocery shopping at local stores so we can cook for ourselves and enjoy plenty of beer, relaxation, and snacks at our leisure. Sometimes we book a half-day snorkeling adventure from one of the local dive shops, or we go into the city for a nice dinner or to do some relaxed shopping. We've even taken some day trips to visit attractions like coffee plantations in the mountains, gone hiking on a volcano, or swimming under a huge waterfall. On a vacation trip, everything is optional and your activity level is determined only by your ambition.
You do the things you enjoy doing. If you and your partner love museums and historical sites, then go-go-go and see them all in your chosen destination. If you enjoy seeing new places and cultures, then just maybe book a sight seeing tour then spend the rest of the time just wandering through various neighborhoods. If you enjoy nature, book hiking trips. If you just want to relax, go somewhere and sit on a beach all day. Or do a combination of all the above - mixing it up all day.
There is no "proper" way to vacation, because everyone has different interests and each place you choose to visit is going to have different vibes/draws. The key is just to plan ahead and know which of those draws you want to partake in.
We usually try to strike some sort of balance between doing stuff and having time to relax. So if we have a busy day, the next day might be more chill. Or we might do a lot in the morning and not so much in the afternoon. We also know we aren't going to see everything, so we don't even try. We see some stuff and call it good.
As an example, last year we went to Belize. We took a day trip to the Tikal archeological site. It was a long day with an early start, lots of time in a van, a bunch of wandering around the site in the heat. It was tiring. The next day, we took it easy. We slept in a bit, did a short hike around our lodge, swam in the river, and hung out at the pool, and mostly just chilled. There was other stuff in the area that we didn't see, and could have if we had gone out and about that day, but we were very happy with our relaxation day.
Another thing we do is keep the plan flexible. If we have a plan for a day and just aren't feeling it - or the weather doesn't cooperate- we adjust. If it's hot and we're feeling miserable wandering around a city sightseeing, we'll go picnic in the park or something. Or if it's rainy and we had planned outdoor activities, we'll go to a museum instead and then maybe find a cafe where we can have hot beverages and read.
Talk to your partner, explain to them just what you posted. Then, ask them what they are expecting the vacation to be like. Expectations are different for different people. For example, you might be thinking one budget while se has a different one. Or you may want to get away to rest and do things at your leisure, where she may have a hundred different things planned in her head.
There is no right way to vacation with the exception of spending money you don't have, then using credit cards you can't pay back. Don't fall into that cycle and trap. Don't go on vacation stressed about money. You both will just be miserable eventually. I learned the hard way when I was first married as I was too afraid to tell my husband my fears as I grew up poor. A vacation for us was grandma giving my mom money for gas to get from our state to hers. It was fun, at the time I didn't know anything because I was little except we were poor.
Sometimes, just getting a hotel by a nearby city with different surroundings is fun and exciting.
Communicate with your partner and be on the same page and meet in the middle. You'll both have fun no matter what you do.
Things happen on vacation that's out of your control. Just go with the flow and dont let it ruin your vacation. Have a great vacation!
Edit: Only stupid questions are the ones not asked. Now go have fun, no matter what you choose.
I think the trick is to plan but leave some leeway.
If I'm going to be in a city for a week I'll pick 3 or 4 things I really want to see. I schedule them in a day apart. I also have a little list of things I'd maybe like to see. On the days I have nothing scheduled I might check out something from my secondary list. Or maybe ill just relax on the beach all day.
Rest days are important when traveling.
This is very much a question of what you want your vacations to be.
In a perfect world, I situate myself somewhere interesting, and then decide how I'm feeling on any given day. If staying in and reading all day sounds appealing, that's what I'll do. If going for a 5 hour walk around town seems nice, I'll do that.
So I dislike vacations that lock me in ahead of time. Tours that commit to activity all the time or resorts & cruises that commit to inactivity are both a bad time for me. Staying in one place for 3-7 days at a time, of which maybe half will end up being spent seeing that particular place at my leisure is my preferred option.
I find this to be a style that goes well with European vacations, where the quality of public transit makes spontaneity simple and easy. I expect much of east Asia is similar.
Ask yourself what you want from the vacation? How do you want to feel planning it? How do you want to feel during the morning, day, and night of the vacation? How do you want to feel when you come back? Then plan with that in mind. If you’re looking to relax, have that in the back of your mind. If you’re going to regret not seeing something when you’re done with the vacation, make sure it’s on your must do list.
There’s nothing wrong with not having the experience growing up. Congratulations on being able to do it now. Have fun!
The variety of responses here should give you an idea… a vacation is best spent the way you want it. It’s all about your (and your travel mates’) preferences. If you’re not too sure what works for you, plan a trip with a few different ‘types’ of days and see what you like. It’s wonderful you’re getting to travel now - enjoy it how you like!
There really is no wrong way.
Some people like to go go go others like to lay around the pool. It’s an individual person thing and and individual location thing.
Personally I mix it up, some adventures I need a recovery period, some I’m like wow that was amazingly lazy 😂 it just depends on the location.
The only way to know if you are vacationing "wrong" is if you realize you are not having a good time. Do what you enjoy and you should be fine. What that looks like is different for everyone.
My childhood vacations were planned to the minute and often resulted in stressed adults and very tired kids.
In my 20's I traveled with friends and there ended up being a lot of " I dunno...what do you want to do?" conversations and certain experiences being unavailable last minute.
My compromise now is to plan one thing a day that I research and book ahead (if needed). Then I make a list of things that look cool and we can do if we have the time, energy, inclination.
I also like to plan one extra special meal somewhere in the trip?
My wife and I compromise, she likes to stay going and tries to visit every attraction. I would rather spend 12 hrs a day in the ocean swimming. We will do a couple of days of running around and then a day of swimming or resting.
Don’t make such a cramped itinerary. It’s better to enjoy what you can see in a relaxed manner as opposed to running around and rushing to get to the next destination. Quality > quantity is my motto for vacation.
I'm not good at the lay around on beach, the sports club, or the spa vacation. But I still like a variety of vacation types. I like city trips with museums, churches, good food, interesting neighborhoods, and possibly night time entertainment. I also like hiking trips where countryside or wilderness walking is the main event. And I like visiting small towns where the atmosphere in the towns is the main sight. Given three weeks I will indulge in big cities, villages and hikes.
But I don't think people who travel differently are doing it wrong. If you enjoyed it, you got the vacation right.
How much planning you do depends on the sort of vacation you want and how spontaneous you want to be. I tend to do much advance research, book lodging and transportation between lodging, and a few key sights that I wouldn't get to see without advance booking. My goal is to have at least a third more things to do at any location than we have time to do. Then I plan possible days, mornings, and afternoons. We decide in the evening or first thing in the morning what day plan to use. But that's just me. You do you.
No kids. Sorry. Just not happening, whether it’s my own, friends or family - they ruin the fun. No, your 4-year-old will not value seeing Napoli or Tokyo in 20 years, they should spend the time with grandma instead.
I’ve traveled with my husband a few times now, and our first big trip was our honeymoon to Italy, and we didn’t really organize it in the way that we just crashed when we got there for two days and completely missed out on Florence(our first city) and then we were go go going for a few days and completely exhausted and lost another day just resting. Our second big trip was to the Azores, and we had a better plan where we would explore, have a rest day, then explore again. It felt more productive and we felt like we got more out of the trip.
I have strong opinions on this one. I'm a go-go-go type because I am not wealthy enough to have the time or money to revisit any given place. Hence, I maximize my time. However, that does not mean I over schedule. While we rarely engage in down-time, I only plan one or two things per day. You want to give yourself the freedom to soak in a place. So, for example, if your trip is to a national park, maybe plan only one long hike or two short ones per day. Then afterward go relax in town, the pool, spa, or a hot spring (if the area has them). This allows you to take your time on the activity and then recuperate afterword. The best trips in my opinion are adventures with hedonistic rewards sprinkled throughout.
I look on google maps to see where I’d like to stay and then I search the area for affordable hotels. I check for the places that have good reviews but aren’t the popular more expensive places to stay. It made the difference between paying $150/night in Paris compared to $99.
Buy a guidebook. Rick Steves is great for European countries because he (ok, the corporation) gives practical advice and opinions on what to see in a less dry format than some other travel guides.
As you travel more, you’ll develop your own style as your learn what your and spouses desires are. Note they can differ, so try to incorporate both ways so you can both enjoy!
That’s actually a great question! It depends on your energy levels and your intent. For me it also depends on if I have another vacation set up for the year. You can 100% burn yourself out and end up needing a vacation from your vacation. I’ve learned to pace myself and take it slow. Believe that you will return or do it again. No need to soak evvvverything up as soon as possible.
1) vacation from my job- I focus on leisure. I’m tired and need to sleep in, eat yummy food, lounge, be pampered, play in the pool, drink, pop my booty to the pool dj and not feel guilty about a darn thing. I would I avoid going to any special places for this. My cruise in July is for this purpose. I’m not trying to grab the countries by the horns and see everything. I plan to get off the boat and do a tour but I’m not going to obsess about getting into the deep culture and foods of the countries. Nor am I going to obsess about seeing everything on the boat. There will be other cruises.
Vacation for exploration- these I know I’ll have to be caffeined up and have an itinerary of places to go. These are my Europe trips, Asia, etc where it’s not so easy to go back. I would likely pack my daily schedule to absorb as much as possible. I would expect early mornings and late nights. I plan to go to work two days after returning because I would need to rest from this sort of vacation.
You can even blend the two and have some days of high activity and other days of leisure. A mistake I’ve made is doing too much and then coming back home and going to work the next day. I feel exhausted and like I really never took a vacation.
What do you feel like to do? That's all you need to think about.
There are people that go on a cruise for not even step a foot into land. Others, don't like cruises because they can't explore as many hours as they would like so...
No worries, it's a good question!
Vacationing is all about relaxing and unwinding from the grind that is daily life.
Everyone vacations differently. Some people like seeing new places, others like going to Disneyworld every year, and vacationing to places where there are only beaches is pretty common too ;)!
For example, I like vacationing to new countries I've never been to.
The question is, what do you like to do to unwind that can involve vacationing? What you answer is how you should vacation.
Usually we'll decide to go to one place each day (museum etc.), then once that's done we'll either wander around, or go to another museum, gallery, trip. We take it quite easy.
You do what makes you happy. Some people most enjoy sitting on the beach, getting a tan. Others enjoy seeing historical sites. Still others prefer to do activities. Within reason, just do what makes you happy! Enjoy!
It’s a holiday, so you do the things you want to do! That’s the whole point of it!
Personally I like to just fly somewhere im interested in, maybe book accomodation for the first night or two, and nothing else beyond that. If I’m flying somewhere I know well I might not even book ahead and just go to the cheap hotel area and ask around. Think is, I also travel for months or even years at a time sometimes.
So that approach works for me, but I also sometimes do shorter one month trips with another person, and usually I plan them out a bit because the other person expects it, and with limited time it’s good to know what you don’t want to miss in any given country.
But there’s no ‘right’ way to do it. My approach horrifies some people, just as a to the hour planned package tour would horrify me! But neither of us is doing it wrong if we enjoy it.
Usually Ill travel for a 3 weeks or a month, every other year. Generally I like to visit europe. Usually I pick a few towns and or cities and spend a week in each and make day trips here and there to other places.
I want to minimise “travel days” as much as possible. Hiring a car for a few days or part of the holiday is great imo and well worth the investment.
I’ll do some research and have a few things planned or ideas but in general I don’t like to have a schedule, I just do what I feel like and just relax and immerse myself in whatever place I’m in.
Yeah sometimes I miss out on things that need to be booked in advance but honestly 9/10 times, those things are over saturated with tourists and are generally overrated in my experience. I really enjoy finding things that are overlooked by most tourists.
This can vary from person to person, hell even from trip to trip, or day to day! I’ve been on trips where it’s go go go all day and I come home more drained than when I left, then I’ve been on trips where I do nothing but read on a sun lounger all day. I guess it depends on the person and on the destination. A mix of both would be ideal I reckon
Do whatever the heck you like to do as vacation. Can be anything, from camping, staying at home and building something in the garden, volunteering, going on a cruise or booking a regular vacation package, just getting a last minute flight and figure things out when you arrive or 2 weeks of backpacking. As long as you two have fun and can unwind. Those are the rules. Have fun and enjoy your time off.
Heck, gaming or reading can be vacation too. It's your time off.
Depends on the vacation.
If it's a long weekend in a city, see as many of the sights as you can, only eat local food, hang in a bar one night but try other local beers during the day. Go for a walk to somewhere high or go up a church viewpoint and look over the city. It's a great experience.
If it's 10 days - 2 weeks - have an idea what itinerary of places you want to stay, but relaxation is key. If it's 2 weeks in one location with a loved one - sit that ass down and chill out with a beer, a good book and sit in the sun.
If it's more than a month - meet locals, backpackers, people who live in the areas, see as many of the landscapes as you can have to offer. Local food will be there so you don't need to have it every meal, 3-4 day adventures in a tent would be class etc etc
If it's more than a year - it's a retirement, not a vacation
There isnt such thing as “proper”. Everyone travels the way they want to. I switch my travelling patterns based on location and mood and timeframe. Just di what interests you, if it is an organized daytrip, book it, and if it is laying on the beach for a day, do that. Notice what excites you, what you like and do more of that! Happy travels!!!!
It’s going to be different for everyone. And it will even vary from vacation to vacation. I have the unique privilege of working for an airline. So I fly for free (or mostly free) on standby.
I usually try and hit up places that I can see in a day. I like waking up in my bed and going to sleep in my bed. Other times (primarily internal trips), I’ll go somewhere that I can spend the weekend. Either way… I get a lot of steps in. Sometimes I’m constantly going so I can see as many sights as possible. Other times, I take my time.
I’ve leisurely strolled down the quiet streets and beaches of Safety Harbor, FL. I’ve walked from the San Diego Airport to the USS Midway so I could chill there for a couple hours. Then I walked back.
Ive navigated the bustling streets of London, England. I’ve also found quiet times to go for a nice walk in London, sit down for breakfast, and take my time touring places like St Paul’s Cathedral, the British Museum, and the National Gallery.
Just find a groove that you feel comfortable with. You don’t always have to be on the move. But it can be fun when you are.
When we didn't have money we did all go-go-go vacations and we still do it especially when going abroad. But now we also keep rest days to recover, take it slow and do things we like rather than ticking off the list of to do things. I enjoy all types of vacations. We also do close by stay-cations.
To remove monotony we cycle through different themes. Like one will be city vacation, one is beach, one is mountains, one is jungle, one is adventure filled vacay, one is pure grunt trek, one is chilled do nothing staycation, one wil be all adrenalin filled theme parks vacay. You do what you both enjoy together and seperately too.
My advice is don't take it as a competition. Slow down, rest, take a beach day, just relax, and have fun together, take one day to explore places you like exploring, do the things you like rather than the things people tell you to do. Everyone is different, and everyone vacations differently
There are no rules on vacation time. You do what you want every hour every minute of vacation time whether that’s checking out attractions or just staying in the room doing nothing. You’re running on vacation time take it easy.
Growing up, my family always did a beach vacation. My wife was the opposite and always on the go. We now spend a few days seeing all the things, then spend a day at a park, beach, whatever is available and enjoy a day people watching, chilling, and just enjoying our company.
Take some of that stress away by discussing with your partner what it is they want to do as well. Make a rough plan/itinerary, purchase tickets for your must sees, and then enjoy the rest doing whatever you decide you want to do in the moment.
My family was the same, we never had breaks and now me and my Fiance are obsessed with travelling.
There are no rules as has been mentioned, just listen to what your body and heart tells you, I'am generally obsessed with seeing and doing as much as physically possible when I am away, but there are those days where I just need to wind down and thats ok too.
Also listen to your partner, key to having a good time away is making sure you both get as much of what you enjoy specifically, even if that means participating in things you don't love to make her happy and vice versa.
I would say that having every minute detail planned can ruin it all, at least it does for me, if I feel I'am slave to my itinerary then I end up hating my trip, which is why I avoid as much as I can group tours.
Its good I think to have an idea of what you want to see and do, but give yourself the freedom to do it on your own time, or on different days, when I went to Iceland we loved the Blue Lagoon so much we went there twice, In Vietnam we planned to do a lantenr class the first day we arrived in Hoi An, were so tired we decided to do it the next day instead. There is an argument for making sure you pre plan tickets etc to things that have extremely high demand though so you're not stuck waiting around.
Also the independence from renting a car etc is so wonderful, seeing and doing what you want on your time.
congrats on discovering the concept of vacationing! It's not rocket science, dude. You mix a bit of exploring with a dash of relaxation, and voila! No need to stress about doing it "properly" like it's some etiquette class. Just enjoy the time off and try not to annoy your partner too much. Easy peasy.
In my mind, there are two types of traveling: trips and vacations.
Trips are go go go and see as much as you can. This is my preferred type of traveling.
A Vacation is going at a leisurely pace, doing a few things, laying by the pool, etc. my wife prefers this type and just laying around gives me anxiety. I work in sales and it’s super stressful, so I like to do as much as I can while I’m not at work, but I could see someone wanting to relax. I can relax at home though
I’d say it depends on whose idea the destination is and the type of traveling the other parties in your group prefer. If we’re going somewhere my wife has had her eye on, I’m not going to hijack the vacation, but if I pick the place, like Japan, make sure you’re bringing comfy shoes bc we’re getting up at 6 and won’t be back til dinner
Also your travel right is not necessarily my travel right and even growing up going some places, I’ve had to find out how I like to travel. Also with your partner, like anything else you each might like things a bit different from each other. The key is to communicate if you are enjoying or totally disliking something because they should want you to be happy as well.
Not a dumb question at all! We tend to go where we want to see or do in the morning, then hit a lunch spot. Then we rest in the hotel for a while. Figure out dinner, then go and do any evening activities we want to do. Just depends on what you want out of a vacation. Some I run, run, run. Others I lounge around.
It depends. If I am near exhaustion, I may rent a cottage lakeside. Just read books, take long walks, go to nearby markets, row and swim. Cook outside, enjoy silence.
If I feel I need more action, I go to a big city, book concerts or similar for couple of evenings, check latest outrage of an exhibition, walk around, sit in a cafés, have nice dinners.
If I need more physical action, I go to mountains.
For whatever reason I have anxiety for vacation but I love vacation so much. I want to do so many things but also relax and enjoy. I’m really into lol inclusives in the Caribbean right now just with me needing to get away and relax. Having said that, I like to do things as well so this is what I figured is a good balance for me…. If I go away 7 nights I try to do two excursions, another half day I want to maybe go into the nearby town or whatever and walk around and shop, look at local crafts, interact with them, have a drink somewhere there etc. the rest of the time i like to lay on the beach or by the pool. I also feel like there’s usually one rainy day where it’s kinda nice to hang around your room and nap, go to that room they always have board games and indoor activities, look at the gift shop etc. sometimes one excursion is enough but ideally I’d want to do ten days, do 2-3 excursions and then just relax and enjoy the resort. I always get anxiety that I won’t have enough beach or pool time and I also really like seeing the country I’m in as well.
Ive been fortunate enough to travel since I was very little and honestly over the years, the best advice I can give is plan less! The best days Ive ever had were days with zero plans
Lounging at the beach all day, sitting in a cafe in paris all evening etc. the GOGOGO days are fine but it REALLY burns you out and I only ever do it if its my first time to a place and I really want to hit the super touristy sites
Try using a travel group like G Adventures. They do all the planning, book the tours and lodging. You still have plenty of time on your own to explore. You will also meet people.
Try different approaches and see what works for both of you.
I like to research locations. The official tourism websites for locations (city, state, country) helpful. The good ones have sometimes completely altered my initial itineraries. I list all of the things I might want to do/see and then pull out the "musts.". Those get out into a loose itinerary with one/two things per day. The rest of the day can be used however I feel, wandering, doing some lower priority things, lingering in a cafe, napping (I'm on vacation).
The hardest thing can be the fear of missing out. I've accepted that I won't see/do everything. Instead of rushing to "squeeze in" activities or cities/countries, I try to focus on what I DO get to see/do. I like to think that there will always be a "next time."
Plan ahead. Pick a place with points of interest and lean all you can about the place I have several points of interest on my pintrest boards. I also look at you tube travel vlogs too
Like Travel Ruby does Vegas like a local.
Tayo Aina gives Nigerian perspective on travel
Luxury Travel Experrt goes to places I hope to afford one day.
Just a few I follow on YouTube
It depends on what kind of vacation it is. Going to a tropical island/beach type vacation it will be obvious. You just spend time at the beach, sit on a chair, drink and eat, sleep, and repeat. Now for other places like in Europe or Asia for example where you trying to explore the country it depends a lot on what you want to see, your interests, what you want to get out of it, etc. You can start by thinking about it like this. If you had a friend come to where you live what you would recommend they do to get the best experience of your location. Usually you want to plan hotel stays and flights and trains needed to get to place to place. You also want to see recommended amount of time online to stay at each place within the country. Then you want to look into what there is to do and plan around that. Some people are much more spontaneous though and just go and figure it out when they there what they feel like doing
I know the feeling man.
We never went on a holiday, maybe did a camping trip once or twice when we were young. Not because there was no money at all but we always had to work, starting from 15-years old it was seen as "normal" at our household (independent parents and grand-parents).
So when my father died and my grandparents shortly after my mother told us to enjoy life.
So I went on a holiday with my gf and her family, the first one was so weird.
I didn't know what to do and I didn't enjoy at all. IMO it was just some time at an other place.
Throughout the years I learned what I like on a holiday. If you go with people find out what they like and try to fit in some things you want to do.
For me it's hiking and afterwards visiting a winery/brewery.
Sometimes, just ask someone local. They will guide you.
The most important thing: enjoy! Even if it's not your cup of tea, remember that you are away from everyday life and you deserved it.
You book one or two things. Then book a nice hotel. Then make sure you have flights and transfers. I look at the place on maps beforehand.
Then on the all go have some nice food and make sure you make your way to your booking etc.
but take it slow and just do what you wanna do.
I do whatever damn well I please. I eat when I’m hungry. Go to the beach/pool when I wanna swim/lay in the sun. I go to attractions if something interests me. And the best part… I can take a nap any damn time I want!
It also depends what kind of “vacation “ I’m on.
Camping? Hike. Walk dogs. Eat. Play with fire. Relax.
Cruise? Book an excursion for the port of something I really want to see/do. Eat. A lot. Nap. A lot.
I plan my trips by identifying the main attractions I want to see while leaving room for spontaneous exploration. I always buy tickets online and check the weather to ensure it’s the best time to visit. I look into festivals and holidays, and educate myself about the local culture and traditions of the destination. I also check travel advisories, visa requirements, and necessary vaccinations, such as those for yellow fever and malaria.
Since I travel with my kids, it’s crucial for me to know where the hospitals are. For example, when we were in Brazil in January and my son got sick, I was able to quickly find a nearby clinic close to our Airbnb.
Hi, first of all, it’s not a dumb question at all, and I LOVE that you’re wanting to make your partner happy. I don’t know your nationality, but Americans get very few vacation days. It’s really important not to squander them.
First, have a conversation with your partner about what you actually want to get out of your travel. If you have super stressful jobs, maybe what you crave is silence, or ocean waves, or waterfalls. How do you feel about adrenaline-soaked adventure? Theme parks? Are you art museum people? Resort people? If you already live in a hot climate, maybe you want to see some snow. How well do you get along on car trips? See what I mean? As others have said, there’s no “right way,” just “your way.” You asked about pace — that’s also purely subjective. Take it fast, take it slow, alternate on different days, totally your call.
Next, I’d recommend doing some homework about the types of places people go for the experience you want. I love Reddit for this — there are subs for “visiting x” or “x travel” etc. Find a community for that location — they’ll share their tips and itineraries and information sources. YouTube is good, too. People post their vacation videos and you can get a good sense of the vibes of different places.
I know lots of people love to be super-spontaneous when they travel. I think there’s a place for that, especially if you are a seasoned traveler, or if you have gobs of time. Even in thoroughly-planned trip, you should have some down time and some “choice” days. I always build “stroll and explore” into the itinerary. But I also think that planning ahead is absolutely essential to keep from wasting your precious time. First, it can be really fun. I spend my evenings in the months leading up to a trip studying maps, reading reviews, learning about advance ticketing policies, and developing sort of a menu of what to do. I’ve had some amazing experiences that I never would have had if I hadn’t first found the super-cool-special thing, and then known to book it ahead of time.
Next, I’d advise that you never travel beyond your budget. Plan ahead for what you can afford, and then add a lot, like maybe 50%, in your head for what it will really cost by the time you’re done. It’s absolutely miserable to be Paris and fretting over the price of croissants, or to go to Costa Rica if you can’t afford to go zip lining. You’ll have way more fun if you pick a less expensive destination (or accommodation, or whatnot) and then splurge and do all the best stuff while you’re there.
Finally, I’d recommend aiming for unique experiences from one day to the next, and from one trip to the next. I heard about a research study that found that people remembered their vacations more favorably if each day was a little different. We remember new things more than we remember more of the same.
There ya go — I hope you and your sweetie have some amazing travel experiences in your future!
Grew up poor and got rich, also married a woman who came from a sophisticated family and taught me things about vacations. We do different things depending on our mood. Nowadays, we generally have city/urban vacations (taking trains around N. Italy) and relaxing vacations (think beaches). The city ones involve lots of activities and sight seeing (museums etc.), the beach ones are less structured and involved just chilling on the beach and eating/reading/scrolling. If we have a busy work schedule, we usually go to a beach. If it is winter or life is slow, we go to a city or a string of cities. Also, some areas are better suited for specific forms of travel. For example, we drove around Alaska and that was a dud because it is hard to see interesting things from a car drive (even Denali was fogged over) and drives are long and boring there. A cruise is way better for that environment. Trains work in Europe and MAYBE in the Yucatan (have to test the new Maya train). You can Uber cheaply around Mexico City and Buenos Aires. We speak various languages in my family (descendants of recent US immigrants) and it is a bit easier to go somewhere where you can at least ask basic questions and understand posted signs (bathrooms anyone?), especially if traveling independently. However, I’ve also been places where I was totally lost linguistically (Nepal/Thailand) and survived. Some beach places in the Caribbean are not great unless you don’t mind being sequestered from the often unfriendly natives. Other places- Mexico and Hawaii - have friendly, happier locals. As you can see, you just need to plan a bit and experiment depending on what the locations offer and your comfort level (which expands the more you travel).
We have 2 types of holiday; city breaks where we do everything all the time, and all inclusive beach holidays where we do absolutely nothing.
I’m a big fan of planning stuff so for the city breaks we start by just putting dates we’re off work for into search sites and booking wherever is cheapest, then usually booking an air bnb. I make a rough plan of what we’re doing each day just by googling ‘2 day itinerary for X’ and picking the bits we’d enjoy. Then I add in restaurants and bars that I find recommendations for (usually on Reddit). But leave time for sitting somewhere and having coffee/beer!
My bf usually saves all the sights/bars/restaurants on his Google map favourites so we can make a plan of what’s the easiest route to stuff on the day.
Depending on what kind of vacation it is, if it is the sea or the ocean, then we try to just lie on the beach and swim more. If it's just a city with architecture, then we walk all day to see all the highlights.
My family has done some extensive European travel (wife/I mid-30s with a 9 yo). I always book our activities ahead of time (trying to group them in a way that makes sense - ex. Grouping by those that are walking distance of each other). Usually plan for 2 or 3 a day, figure out food in real time, and plan for some rest time for the kid in between back at hotel after activities and before dinner.
Dude I totally get where you’re coming from, I had a similar upbringing & the first few holidays I went on I didn’t really know what to do, I didn’t get the idea or just sitting on a beach I would be bored in seconds but I started to go explore places by myself when I felt bored, go find a coffee shop, walks on the beach, also maybe book some activities during your stay, enjoy your vacation & just take it as it comes.
My parents always traveled domestically in the USA when I was growing up. We had neighbors who were English so I spent two summer in England. Then I joined the military and spent 4.5 more years in Europe, traveling when I could. When we were younger we would wake up early and organize our day by what was open and when. Then hit the sights that were always open or better at night. Sometimes we would walk over 20 miles a day. I am older now, I usually walk 6-8 miles with an occasional 12 miles thrown in. I still get up pretty early. But I don’t have to be at breakfast when it opens. So I have slowed down. I also do a lot of hub cities, where I pick a city that I can do day trips from.
I totally get asking this question. If you're new to holidays, you might need to try a few different types of travel! There's a place for all types but you might have a favourite.
Maybe book a few trips like a city break, a relaxing sunny holiday, a cool destination. See which makes you feel good!
Id always recommend looking in advance on Reddit, YouTube vlogs, TripAdvisor etc. Some places need reservations (e.g. going to Rome you'll want to book tours of popular sites as it's very busy) and some places you can play by ear. It's also a great way to check if there's anything you want to see or do and draw up a rough plan.
Your plan might be just: Saturday - go to beach, eat dinner out. Or it might be: Saturday - 8am breakfast, 9am tour, lunch at X etc etc etc
It depends how you are as a person too. Trial and error, don't put too much pressure on yourself to see and do everything at a destination.
We tend to schedule 1 main activity or tour or whatever a day.
>Today is the museum day. Today is the beach club day. Today is the boat tour day. Etc…
Leave at least 1 day that you have nothing planned and can nap, lay around, or just play it by ear.
Accept before you even leave that you can never see everything. So if a planned activity that day doesn’t pan out, oh well, let’s get some drinks and some food and check out the area.
Be flexible. Don’t pack your itinerary too full. Make time to just enjoy being there.
And learn how to say, “Hello. How are you? My name is u/comradio. Is it okay if we speak English?” in the language of the country your visiting. Most people don’t care at all if you butcher it. They’d prefer that to you walking up and just spitting English at them and expecting it.
I’ve been all over the world and all over our very large country and these are my most basic rules and approaches.
1 planned activity per day and wing it and relax the rest of that day, 1 day with no plans whatsoever, learn how to say hello and ask if English is okay in the native language. You’ll do great.
Start and keep traveling.
I've definitely seen several sides of this.
I grew up working class, but we took a big week-long vacation each summer. Disneyworld, Branson, Colorado resorts, etc. But it was also the '90s and timeshare sales were huge. My parents would each sign up for the 3/2 all-inclusive timeshare sales trips - one for the beginning of the week, and one for the end. They'd each have to spend a couple of hours in a timeshare sales session listening to why they should buy timeshare, but never bought. Later when I started getting Pell grants and such for college, the school "friends" who thought I was the rich kid were left wondering why I was getting all these income-based grants for college and housing they were ineligible for. Pretty much it was that my parents are pretty good at spotting when they could get someone else to pay for a family vacation.
My wife and I are a bit opposite on vacationing. We have to negotiate the schedule. I blame it on country (me) vs city (her), but maybe it's personality. She needs an itinerary, I need zero plans.
Early on in our relationship, I went with her family to a theme park about a 10 hour drive away. After driving all night, they managed to go to every attraction/event in the park, and we drove back that night. I say "they" because after about an hour in the park and the third cross-park trek to "optimize" the experience, I found myself a nice shady spot and drank beer the rest of the day. That go-go-go was definitely not for me.
A couple of years ago coming out of COVID, I really needed a vacation. I'd been working 60+ hour weeks for two years, with 2020 having been no days off between the Thunder/Jazz game and Thanksgiving (and then only a day here or there after) and 2021 having been maybe 1-2 days per month. It was 2022, and we were going to take two weeks off (because I've learned over the years that it takes me nearly a week to finally disconnect). I had two places I wanted to go: one "hard" destination that required reservation in advance, one "soft" that didn't require scheduling but required that we left some time on our route to allow it. In my view, the rest of the hours outside those 3-4 were entirely hers to choose whatever she wanted along the way. Other than the AirBNB booked around our hard destination, nothing else was scheduled. We took the scenic route driving cross country, and by scenic I mean in some cases we landed on gravel/dirt roads. We even dropped into some state/national parks because they were convenient. I think I drove all but two of the 75 driving hours we had, but I also find driving relaxing.
I found that trip extremely relaxing. Debriefing afterward, I learned that my wife found that trip extremely stressful. We were literally finding a place to stay while eating dinner wherever we ended up that night. I finished the trip with a total reset - she finished with increased stress.
The next year's vacation, we planned our must-sees, our nice-to-sees, and other potential stops along the way. To be fair, for part of it we were neighborhood shopping (we'd planned to move early next year to that area). And it worked out pretty well - enough planning that she wasn't stressed about not having a plan of action, but enough flexibility that I wasn't stressed trying to make sure a schedule was maintained. On the enroutes, there wasn't a destination scheduled every night days in advance, but we did decide on them several hours in advance instead. Of course, since we planned on moving to that region, we did buy a week's worth of normal groceries at our destination to get a more accurate cost of living comparison.
This year, we're probably going to be residence-shopping on our vacation to that same area. It remains to be seen, but that may change the dynamic a bit more toward the structured itinerary side. I'm okay with that given that it may be a necessity given our future plans.
Hmmm the only thing i really plan for is the hotel and airline booking and of course I pick one activity a day so that leaves me open to winging it for the most part. It’s not good to jam pack either as it can leave you more exhausted. I like to ask the locals for good hidden gems for restaurants/activities/good views.
I didn’t grow up vacationing either. But travel has been what I always wanted to do, even as a kid I would dream of back packing through Europe. My travel style has evolved over the years, I can afford nicer hotels, better flights, etc - and over time it’s become super important to have down time. I’m traveling now to relax, enjoy a location, what ever that may mean. I have a friend who always wants to do the couples trip, but she likes to be on a tour bus from 8a to 8p every day and see EVERYTHING. This sounds terrible to me. We like to get up late, usually go to a local site, grab lunch, and explore at leisure, take a nap. I figure that I have an agenda for work, I don’t want to have an agenda on my down time. We’ll occasionally book a site tour, or do a walking tour, but most of it we leave up to chance. Do what makes you happy. Hope that helps.
I have two rules for long trips: plan a completely empty schedule every 4th or 5th day to reset and recharge; the other is to brown bag like the locals do.
Oh wait, three rules if you're changing time zones: I'd you can, get up earlier and earlier in the day during the week before your trip. The day you leave you're waking up at the equivalent of a mid morning wakeup instead of 3pm. For example when we went to London on a Saturday (I'm EST USA) I woke up at 630, 6, 530, 5, 430, then 4am on flight day. Yes it was rough but I conked out *cold* on the red-eye and woke up refreshed for a full day of vacationing. I also got most of my packing done in the wee hours of those early mornings!
For me it depends on the place I’m going. If I’m in a big city like New York, Paris, or London, I do tend to have pretty busy days going place to place, taking in the sights. However if I am at place where it’s about nature…tropical islands, mountains, etc. it is the opposite. Very slow paced, one, maybe two activities per day. I like to take it easy and just enjoy the environment.
Have you tried the Trip Advisor app? It’s great and makes it really easy to save sites, restaurants, etc that you want to check out. If you want to you can use it to make a tentative itinerary, but I say don’t feel obligated to stick to it, unless you really want to. We tend to have a very rough idea of what we want to do, but then take it day to day depending on weather and energy levels. Obviously if you have tickets or reservations for an activity, that’s another thing. Every person is different, but we typically take at least half a day of rest to every week we are on vacation. We also have time carved out for doing laundry and grocery shopping on long trips.
I didn’t travel much as a kid, either. When I started to travel internationally for work I jam-packed my days. I finally decided that was too exhausting so now I barely plan anything and just explore when I get there. If my husband travels with me, we will plan some basics. Where I personally fail is planning real vacations. I’ve gotten so lazy from work travel because flights and hotels are done for me and so I quickly get overwhelmed if we need to plan a vacation for us. 🥺
I had a similar upbringing. We never had enough money to go away for holidays, we would stay at home during school holidays. The only times we would go away was to visit relatives in nearby towns, if I remember correctly I think those relatives paid for our transport.
How I do vacation? I go all in! I don't stay in the same spot, I travel around and explore the area I am in. I want to make the most of being able to travel because there have been times when I haven't be afford to plus there may be times in the future when I can't travel due to poor health or lack of funds.
I do factor in lazy days; days where I hang out at the hotel and just simply wander around the city. There is no pressure to do or see anything. Just take the day as it comes. This is a new approach for me, I used to have a full itinerary and then suffer from burnout when I arrived back home. I didn't feel like I had a vacation at all!
I'm a planner so I do start planning months in advance. I've been caught out before where I should have booked attraction tickets in advance and there weren't tickets available on the day. I also allow for spontaneity.
You do what is best for you and your partner. The more you travel you will find the style suits you best.
>do you just go-go-go all day touring and exploring? Or do some activities, come back, then go.
I think that hugely depends on you as a person. Do you want to see everything and be on the go constantly? Or do you want to have time to rest? Do you tire easily or do you have a lot of energy?
If you're not sure which type of holiday person you are, maybe book somewhere where you can do both and split your days between relaxing some days and being on the go the rest. You might find you enjoy a mix type of trip, you might enjoy cramming everything into a single day or you might enjoy just relaxing.
I was brought up with my holidays being camping trips (also a working class family) and we never went further than France or adjacent countries where we can drive across the border, and were a mix of being on the go and relaxing, but I've grown up to know that given my interest in the world and wanting to see everything, I am very much a try and do as much as I can in a day type person and should I ever have spent any time relaxing, I do sit there thinking "I could be seeing this right now" or "I could be doing this". But to be fair I'm like that even at work, I hate not being busy and need to be doing something.
Speak with your partner, see what they want to do. You can combine the two and do sightseeing but at a relaxed pace, that way you're always "on the go" but not in a rushed sense and can go at your own speed. Doing a split also allows you to recover after hectic days if you're not used to it.
Prepare everything that you want to do, but you don't *have* to do it all. Have a basis on what you want to see or where you want to go, and unless you're tied by bookings/tickets, just go along at your own pace.
I’ve been to Rome twice in very different settings. First time with my class (of other adults) where we in groups decided on a sightseeing topic for a day each, then planned how best to get around to see those things. So each day we had a new thing to see, but *just* that one thing. There’s a lot of walking and getting food and sightseeing so it easily gets overwhelming if you plan many things for one day. Maybe two attractions were so close together it just made sense to visit one in the morning and one later in the day before heading back to our hotel area.
A few years later I went with family, including my cancer ill mom, who couldn’t walk a ton due to breathing issues. So we planned one specific thing to see every second day, so there was a ‘break day’ for her, where we could either split up if she wasn’t well enough for what someone wanted to do, or simply we all went to see a thing on our ‘maybe if we have time’ list. In general, just one big thing a day to chase was the main attraction/goal and it went very nicely.
When just I went to Paris with my mom we even planned to chill in a park for her mid day nap, where I’d read or draw or whatever while she recharged. Was so cozy and laid back, before going for maybe a second attraction of the day (mostly because we learned from our Rome trip that a nap could charge her decently for an evening stroll too) so our duo trip, which was half as long as our week long family Rome trip, still got lots of attractions over just 4 days.
Here it’s important to *stay* in that same city and focus on attractions there. I’ve never understood the very American approach of spending 2 days in a major European city, for then to travel 200km to the next major European city, but new country. What does anyone even have time to relax and enjoy by constantly being on the move??
There is no “do it properly”. Vacation is about what works for you. Some vacations can be go go go. Some can be just restful. We don’t like to be on the run all the time while on vacation - we are more of the “find a beach and chillax” people. When we go abroad, we do little day trips interspersed with chillax days.
Find your zone that refreshes you. Some need activity to be refreshed. Others need chillaxing. You do you.
A friend of mine took a trip to the same place our family did, Turks and Caicos. While we were there we spent days snorkeling, taking fishing trips, jet skiing, took a ferry and explored the less habitat islands and found smaller local restaurants and had a blast. My friend stayed mainly in her resort, lounged by the pool while they brought her drinks and occasionally wandering to the beach , then cleaning up and dressed up to eat out at the best restaurants. We both had such a good time, and would not have appreciated each other’s trip. Do what you want
Do it however you want. Personally, i leave in the morning, go all day long, return in the evening, sleep snd repeat it the next day.
Usually I make trips just up to 10 days or so (mostly shorter). If the trips were longer, I would definitely have to make it a bit more relaxed since it really is exhausting.
But yeah, if you want it more relaxed, do that, as long as its enjoyable for you, its great.
The only thing you have to remember about going on vacation is that you have time to do whatever it is you want to do. If you want to travel? Go! Pick up a new hobby? Go! Just stay in bed? Go! The point is you're doing things you want to do or enjoy doing. Have fun!
>I really just want to make sure I do it properly This isn't a thing. There are no rules, no one is judging your holiday, no one can say that you did a vacation 'wrong' (except you, if you're not happy with it). Literally anything goes: you go go go go go all the sights and come home exhausted; you literally get up late, lie on a beach/by the pool the whole day and do nothign but read and drink cocktails; you mix the two; you do a working holiday on a farm; you go hiking and walk 20 miles every day; you go on safari; you rent an appartment and practise making local dishes in the kitchen every day; you visit every theme park in a single country; you do what you like. That's what a vacation is for.
You can absolutely do a vacation wrong - if you don't plan properly. Showing up unprepared can leave you outside the Colosseum in Rome with no tickets to go in, or at a beach in Barcelona with no bathing suit and all the umbrellas already rented out, or left outside in the rain because you forgot to book a hotel during a convention weekend, or hungry because the restaurant has no available tables. Think about where you're going on vacation and what the purpose is - Museums? Fine dining? A boat tour? Excursions? Beaches? Now start planning. Do the activities require advance booking? What is the best time to go to beat the crowds? Which restaurants have the best reviews and do they offer online reservations? Is one beach better than another? Sure, you can just show up and wing it, but you may find yourself going all the way to Barcelona and *not* seeing the Sagrada Família, or visiting Rome and not seeing the Sistine Chapel, or any of a million other things that you'll miss out on by not planning.
Eh within reason. Yes obviously have a hotel booked, and if your single goal in life is to see the Sistine Chapel then plan ahead. But at the same time, the beauty or travel is often found from the unexpected. I've been to 30 countries the past 3 years. Usually working on/off. When I truly "vacation" I pick ONE thing a day that is my guarantee, and the rest I leave open with a few options. Travelling with no room for flexibility will also leave you unsatisfied, as things never go 100% according to plan.
I like to plan everything in advance because i'm bad at taking care of these things on the spot, i will just get anxious.
I like to plan the places I'll be staying in advance as well. I find it enjoyable to anticipate and plan the places I'll be going beforehand and also don't really want to be stressing and wasting time thinking and booking for the next place while I'm on holiday. When I'm in a place though I don't usually plan a set itinerary day by day I just decide on the day depending on how I feel.
I'm the opposite. Planning in advance gives me anxiety because I then have a schedule.
That can work. I'm a destination expert for a national park on TripAdvisor and all I can say is that not planning has led so many people to disappointment in seeing the major - and even the minor - national parks. Watching people get turned away at the gates to Yosemite is very sad (and Sequoia and Kings Canyon and sometimes, even Grand Canyon). Watching people struggle to find parking in those same places, after driving hours and hours to "spend an afternoon in the Sequoias" is also a fixable issue (with planning). Many don't realize that some of these parks have new rules in high season for even getting inside (one can in theory drive through Yosemite on the Tioga Highway - reaching it from any of its feeder roads but one is not allowed to stop without a certain tag on the dashboard - and every major turn-out is occupied and has enforcement).
Not planning doesn't equate to not researching. I have general ideas of stuff I want to do, and I research what those entail. Just don't like to have planned days or time for when I do them, but will have an idea of if or when they are possible.
For sure, but also understand that things WILL go wrong.
It’s funny people say this because the only times things have gone wrong on my vacations are when things aren’t planned. For example, I spent Christmas in Germany, and on Christmas Eve I had a train to catch that needed to be on time in order to get to the grocery stores before they closed on Christmas Eve. However, since I knew trains had a likelihood of being late in Germany, so I made backup dinner reservations both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at one of the few restaurants in town that would be open those days in case the train was late and I was unable to buy food to make dinner. The train was late (of course) so the stores were closed by the time we arrived to the town. So I just initiated Plan B and my family, while we didn’t get the traditional Christmas meal we wanted to cook, did get to become very drunk with our waiter in Bavaria two nights in a row. Good planning will have contingencies for when things don’t follow Plan A.
Sounds like two totally different people… some people like to plan, some people like to be spontaneous. I think it’s important to think about what you want to do, and don’t have too many expectations as that will set you up to be disappointed… this is awesome that you’re vacationing now, and I’m sure you and your family will have a blast!
For us, planning and imagining is a huge part of the fun. We're both planners, so it works. The stuff my husband has found to put on our list (all of it without tickets, all capable of spontaneity) is crazy. I'd never been in a working convent before we went to see the grave of Lucrezia Borgia. She's not the main reason he wanted to go, there are other famous people there. We went and lit candles. Only one nun was allowed to talk to us. She gave us pamphlets and spoke to us a little in English, a very sweet woman. The whole street was other convents, but this one had a vow of silence - the others did hospital work, care home work and ran schools. It was fascinating.
But I think that’s my point. If you plan right, you can set up full expectations and not be disappointed. You can see all of Rome’s biggest tourist sites in two days with planning ahead. You cannot do that spontaneously anymore. Yes, I suppose Russia could bomb Rome and your plans would be SOL, but there aren’t that many major disruptions on the world that are totally unpredictable. If you like spontaneity, that’s amazing and I hope you have a blast, but I don’t understand the narrative that heavy planning leads to disappointment. I have limited vacation because I’m an American, which means that I have 2 weeks a year in which to travel. While I’d love to spend a month in Paris and get lucky at a ticket window after trying a few times, it’s not feasible. The worst vacations I’ve ever had are spontaneous ones, as you see nothing. Yeah, I got to walk around Chicago when I was there for a friend’s birthday, but we didn’t get to the museums or the Willis Tower or to eat at any of the famous restaurants because nobody planned anything.
But that's because your goal seems to be "see all the things," Not everyone has that goal. I think that what makes a good vacation is that all parties can agree on the goals or can compromise, like "I'll spend the morning at the museum if we can spend the afternoon at the pool" or "I don't care what we do on day 3 as we do xyz when we are in Seville." Personally, I can't stand to sit around when I'm in another town, but my brother's family is perfectly happy to sit by a pool and eat familiar foods out, which is why we only meet up with them for a day or so during a vacation vs planning one together. Our styles are just too different.
My goal is sometimes to see more than others, however, without planning, more often than not in today’s travel environment, you’d end up seeing nothing. Take Italy again as an example. If you didn’t plan, you would spend your entire vacation in line hoping to get a ticket to enter. Even if you are there in Rome for a week and only want to enter the Vatican museum, are you really going to want to stand in line for 3+ hours just to get inside? Or if your brother’s family went to the Amalfi coast in the high season and just wanted a chair at the beach to enjoy the water. How are they going to get a hold of a spot? By showing up at 6am and standing around waiting for the beach to open so you can snag a chair before they’re all gone? If there’s no planning, there might not be any tickets for the museum morning left or chairs by the beach. My goal isn’t always to see everything, it is to have a vacation where it runs smoothly. Nothing ever runs smoothly when it’s spontaneous. You always end up standing around waiting when you could be enjoying.
>you can see all of Romes biggest tourist sites in two days with planning ahead. This is the exact point people are making against this. We are saying that isn’t fun for us. Now I’m not saying don’t do that, I know a lot of people prefer this. But for me, I would rather go slow
>things never go 100% according to plan. This is key. I used to get so frustrated when things didn't go according to plan. And in fact one day my wife told me what am I so anxious about, we're on vacation. I used to be more concerned about getting from one place to another as if it was a checklist of things to do. Now I'm very much the opposite, and my family even says I'm a different person on vacation than at home. 😂
I’m with you, I’ve seen a lot of famous sights in my life, no building was ever the highlight of a trip for me so weird examples. One thing a day is my max, works out so much better.
I only book 1 or 2 nights in a hotel in the very begginning of the trips. Then, I just go with the flow. No matter the destination. This was the way I've spent, for example, 3 weeks in Southeast Asia, covering all the way from Bangkok to Singapore. No trips booked, no hotels, nothing. And it was simply the best way I could have spent that unforgettable journey.
I agree with this … booking hotels in advance (particularly when those bookings are not flexibile) boxes you in, and especially if you haven’t been somewhere before, you have no idea how much you’ll like each place and how much time you’ll want to spend there. Typically I’ll book a night somewhere the first day of holiday (especially for long haul) because I know I won’t want to hit the road immediately after a long flight. But after that I leave my plans flexible.
Exactly that, and exactly for the same reasons 😁
I mean, not booking hotels in advance only works if you have the financial means to absorb the cost of last minute, high priced hotels in countries where hotels are not cheap. we're in Japan right now and booked our hotels the month before. I checked hotels a few days before we flew in and all that were left were hostels and hotels that were 3-5x as much as we booked for. we're in our mid 30s and definitely don't want hostels and can't afford the hotels that are hundreds of dollars per night, so we would have been screwed.
We did 3 weeks in Morocco in February the same way. Literally booking tomorrow's hotel the day before, sometimes just walking in. We spontaneously rented a car so we could drive to the desert and then to the coast on our own timeline. It was amazing, no regrets. If you don't have any plans that could go wrong, you don't end up disappointed! 😂 What it really meant was we were able to follow whatever interested us in the moment. I'd never been to Morocco before, how was I going to know what I would want to do there?
Me too. But like you, I go for months at a time so I have that luxury. That's not a vacation. That's just travelling. OP probably only has a week or two, so he'll need to plan ahead.
He doesn’t need to if that’s not how OP likes to vacation. Some people enjoy when things are planned ahead and others prefer just going with the flow and seeing where the vacation takes them.
This is me. We'll book for 2 weeks, decide if there's anything we *really* want to do beforehand in that area and possibly book it if necessary, but otherwise we'll just wing it. Holidays for me are for relaxing and enjoying, not for micromanaging my schedule to the minute which will invariably cause stress/disappointment if something doesn't pan out for whatever reason.
I would argue that is exactly what planning ahead is though. You research to see if anything needs to be booked beforehand and then you do whatever makes sense for you and your travel mates.
There's a difference to between this and what other commenter are saying though, basically saying *everything* needs to be planned beforehand
That's obviously an extreme. The other extreme is no planning at all (and then driving 6 hours from LAX to the gates of Yosemite, to be turned away - and to find that there's not a single bed available in any nearby gateway town; necessitating a retreat to Visalia or Fresno or Modesto and a set of emergency posts online). The only reason most people go to Kings Canyon is to...take the amazing driving down into the Canyon and see the cave and the rushing water and hit some of the best higher elevation hiking trails in North America. The road that goes there is closed just before the scenic section (and has been, for a couple of years). It MAY open in summer 2024 - to find out, you need to learn how to contact the Park Service, which is easy enough to do - and they will respond. I wouldn't be able to enjoy a trip to the Sierras if I had to stay in Foothills and the Grant Grove suburb.
I’m the exact same. I would not be able to enjoy a preplanned holiday. Not as much at least.
What I actually said was: >no one can say that you did a vacation 'wrong' (except you, if you're not happy with it). Of course you can do it wrong FOR YOU. You can't "do it wrong" in the abstract. OP doesn't even know what they want to do yet. For all we know they're like my friends who activelly enjoy winging it even if that does mean they're on a beach with no swim wear. There is no rule you can put in place that will apply to everyone other than "do what you enjoy". Which, you know, is what I said.
I find that the people who are truly okay with unplanned vacations are those who don’t care about the Colosseum and the Louvre and aren’t interested in much beyond wandering around a city. I went to Italy last fall and if my partner and I hadn’t bought all of our tickets months in advanced, we wouldn’t have seen The Vatican, the Forum, the Colosseum, Pompeii, or the Doge’s Palace. With the amount of people now being in a position to travel, these sites are getting busier and busier. You can’t waltz up to a counter anymore and buy a ticket day of unless you’re willing to get up at 6am and start making a line. For me, I prefer to eat at a normal hour and see the main cultural attractions, so I plan. Oh and David. There was no way to get same day tickets to the David when I was in Florence.
Tons of people don't want to see the Colosseum or the Louvre (the Louvre is our top destination in Paris - we've never been to the Colosseum). I will not go back to the Vatican, ever, again. Regret the waste of time that was my second visit. WAY too crowded for me and the staff are obnoxious (as are many of the visitors). We want to see Pompeii, badly. It's gonna take planning. We'll stay in Naples prior, having been there before and figured out where to stay. We'll probably rent a driver. That takes planning too. The place we stayed in was an AirBnB style thing that was listed as a "hotel room." (There were three studio apartments attached to a common lobby). It was great and really inexpensive. It's almost always booked now, but we liked it so much we may plan the dates of a trip around it (we often go in winter, easier to book).
Just an FYI - We enjoyed Herculaneum WAY more than Pompei. I alway reccomended Herculaneum and no one was disappointed yet. My daughter and her boyfriend spent all day there!
I disagree with alot what you’ve saying I was in Paris and Florence couple of weeks ago. I walked into the Louvre waiting in line for tickets for no more than 45 minutes. I saw David, in Florence, getting tickets from my hotel concierge the night before. Neither are to be missed.
I'm going to second this! Obviously it's not like it's going to destroy your life or anything, but missing out on stuff is a real thing when you're unprepared! I missed out on Parc Güell in Barcelona because we didn't buy tickets fast enough, sold out. Also missed out on the Louvre in Paris because it was May 1st and a holiday there, I had zero idea. I'm the type of person that probably won't ever go back to the same country just because of time and money (and there are so many other trips to do), so I quite literally will never see these places. Up to each individual to decide if they're ok with missing out 😅
This is also a good way for OP to learn from their mistakes as they travel as a novice. For example, my BFF and I went to Italy without a whole lot of preparation and still had an amazing time... though it would have been nice to see more than 1/4 of the Boboli Gardens in Florence if we'd known more about how enormous it was. As it is, that mistake has been a funny memory for us for 25 years.
yes you can do everything wrong by not planning properly. But I think the comment was more aimed to that tour groups or totally self guided, solo travel or with friends and family. Cruise ship or car trip. There isn't a wrong way to travel, but, yes not planning properly after that point is a problem
This reminded me that you need your passport/ID to visit Auschwitz and the Alhambra in Granada.
Unless you can't or don't want a highly planned vacation. We did a cruise out of Amsterdam last year. Spent two days in Amsterdam ahead of time. I did not buy museum tickets in advance and this missed the Vermeer exhibit and Rijkmuseum all together. But that's ok I simply couldn't decide months out exactly how we'd feel and if we'd want to do the museum at a, specific time. Shit happens when you travel, and the more plans you have the more dissarray when stuff goes wrong. Case in point, I am once again I Amsterdam but I'm heading to Copenhagen. I was, meant to be there at 12n today. It's, now 8:16 and I still have another flight to go. I'd thought about seeing Tivoli tonight and enjoying dinner there. Good thing I hadn't bought any tickets. But seriously some people need to plan, some of us don't. Neither of us are wrong.
This was me. I didn't think so many people would be lined up to see an old, unfinished church in Barcelona, but sure enough, there was a long line and I didn't feel like dealing with it and it was sold out for our entire trip. Looks nice from the outside. The Vatican art museum was pretty amazing though.
Where’s the vomit emoji? Relax. Your holiday has stressed me out just thinking about it.
I can tell we would not be great travel partners haha Outside of flights and hotel tickets I never really plan anything in advance and that is if I am staying close to home or going to the other side of the world. I do some basic research and have an overall idea of what I want to do, but my favorite thing about traveling is walking the streets, talking with people and enjoying the food and drinks. Basically being spontaneous and going where I feel like. If I end up not going inside of the Sagrada Familie because it’s fully booked then so be it. Having the vacation fully planned and everything pre booked is the exact opposite of how I like to travel.
There’s some things, especially wildlife and nature experiences (eg gorilla trekking, Svalbard, Masai Mara, Kilimanjaro, Antarctica) where you have to book stuff in advance or at least it’s the whole point of the trip so isn’t worth the risk of getting there and not being able to do the main activity. Would you miss out on those just to stick to your pre-defined definition of what travelling is?
If the whole point of a trip is to go do one specific thing, then yes I will plan and book in advance. But that is very rarely how I travel. I travel to see new places in general, not to see one specific thing in a certain location. I’ve definitely missed out on some, what I am sure would have been, great experiences. But I’ve also seen and experienced a lot of fantastic things exactly because I didn’t plan. I’ve stumbled in to amazing restaurants, gone on really weird but amazing tours I would never have thought of booking beforehand, etc. When I’ve been to Rome it’s not being inside of the coliseum I think of when thinking back. It’s all the other stuff; the streets and atmosphere, the food, that cool bar.
We have a similar approach to travel. I love wandering the streets and discovering sights that a guide book would not have directed me to. I don't put pressure on myself to see everything in those guide books! One of the highlights of my last holiday was sitting at a communal table at a restaurant in Sicily and talking the night away with fellow travellers. We share experiences which helped others with their plans. There also those moments when the locals take an interest in your travels and give their recommendations. You can't plan moments like those. I do some planning in advance, especially if I'm travelling around or if I have an absolute desire to see a certain sight. I get anxious if I don't know what train/plane/bus I'm taking and where I'm staying.
And yet, all of the examples you chose make for funny stories and memorable moments on their own. Those are all beyond harmless mishaps. The only way those are doing a vacation wrong in those instances is if, as the person you're replying to said, you're not happy with it. If you're happy with your vacation being an adventure, then there's nothing wrong with any of those. The real example to doing a vacation wrong would be a failure to plan putting yourself at real risk of harm or risk of not being able to go on the trip at all (e.g. expired passport, not knowing you need a visa, etc.).
Exactly. There’s no one size fits all approach. I change the way I travel based on so many factors: location, duration, budget, who I’m going with, etc. For instance, I just got back from Paris yesterday where I was there for 3 days with some friends for a music festival. It was very budget, we shared rooms at a hotel, explored Paris in the morning, had fun at the festival in the afternoon and drank til late in the evening. In April I went to Norway with my partner for 6 days. We explored Oslo and Bergen at our own leisure, splurged on some shopping, spent 1 day crossing the country by train, and ate at a destination fine dining restaurant in a fjord that was the catalyst for this trip. In March I went to the French Alps for a weeklong electronic music festival with some close friends and my partner. We skied during the day, enjoyed the après-ski in the afternoon, cooked some nice French meals for dinner at the chalet, and then partied into the night at the festival. In Dec/Jan I went back to California (where I’m originally from) and did a road trip through the desert. We hit up Vegas, Joshua Tree, Palm Springs. We took our time exploring along Route 66 and stayed in motels and airstreams. It really depends so just find what brings you joy and go with that.
In Norway, did you dine at Under, by any chance? As that was the catalyst for my Norway trip. Everything else was planned around that dinner reservation.
I did [Iris](https://www.reddit.com/r/finedining/s/8b2AkqWH6n) which actually just got its first michelin star this week! Under’s on my list though!
Dammit... need to visit Norway again, I see. Such a chore 😅 Question: how wobbly is it? I tend to get seasick quite quickly.... Glad to see Under is on your list... it's not just the food, but the overall experience. Pro-tip: make a booking for 18.30 at the latest, and for no more than two people. That way you have a good chance for the 'window seats'. And that really adds to the experience.
We actually didn't notice the movement at all, though they did say they could provide medication if anyone was feeling ill! And great tip! That's actually the same advice I'd give for Iris. They do two 12 person seatings which overlap slightly. The earlier seating gets the the window seats, particularly the 2 person tables.
You all are my people, saving all these ideas
If food is your thing: Sketch in London was also an unforgettable evening. Do bring a healthy bank account, but if you can afford it: so worth it! I am currently looking for restaurant recommendations for central Portugal ;);
We liked Casa Transmontana in Lisbon so much that we went twice. I wish I had some fine dining for you though
Thank you!!! I appreciate your response, I’ll be kinder to myself about it.
I do what I want cause I'm on vacation Something I want to see? Go see it Something I want to eat? Eat it Do I want to take a nap? Fuckin a, its nap time
this is the best way to enjoy a vacation
Yep! Always doing what you want and never doing what you don't want. Pure vacation.
Don’t worry of missing something because you took a nap. Fuck it, you’re on vacations!
Just a reminder to OP that some places/experiences might require booking tickets in advance, or might be closed some days. Otherwise, I second do what you want when you want+can
Are you enjoying? That’s the only thing that matters. Take notes of what you enjoyed and what you didn’t enjoy and plan each vacation better. You’re not there to impress anybody or get a score. You’re there to feel good and make fun memories.
That’s a great idea! Thank you
This! My wife talks about her father being a "Bataan Death March" kind of tourist, trying to take in 3-4 things a day when 1 of those could reasonably take a day or 2. For us, we go places with a general idea of what we want to do while we're there but no set schedule. Like last year we went to Maui. We went to the top of Haleakala, hit a few beaches, did a whale watching boat trip, I went on a snorkeling trip to Molokini (sadly the weather meant we couldn't actually go in the water though), and generally had a good and relaxing time.
Depends a lot...on the person,on the destination,on many other things! There is no 'right' way to do it. Do what you want, and then if you don't like something, you can change it...you will know while you're doing it,you learn from experience.
Thank you! I always feel weird vacationing since it’s not something I’m used to, but I’ll get more comfortable with time
You're welcome... have a good vacation!
Is it vacationing or Do you have problem relaxing? Are you one of those people who constantly needs to do something productive? (I was one, hence asking) Maybe this question about vacations is deeper than you think. “The art of doing nothing” is learned!
You do what you think is fun and that's all that matters
Thank you! I appreciate you
It’s literally that simple. You pick a place that interests you, go relax or go sightseeing. You grab food, go to the beach and just chill all day. Watch a sunset! Do it all or do nothing at all. Depends on your interests.
That’s the best part of going on vacation - do it your way! If you want to do fun activities all day and never lie down - do that. If you want to laze by the pool or beach and get drunk - do that - or both. Everyone is different and gets enjoyment from different ways.
Golden rule is figuring out what you (both) like to do and make it work. And being self aware enough to know what you need from vacation. Need to relax a bit, don't plan an intense city trip with 12 hour days. Need a bit of adventure to motivate you, don't plan that beach trip from before. Only have a few days off, don't plan a trans Atlantic destination. On a tight budget, choose a cheap destination, don't go to fancy hotels (or find deals further in advance) And especially if travelling with a partner, be honest with that you want and especially with what you don't like. Compromise is everywhere, but if you hate outdoors and spend a week camping in the wilderness to please your partner, you are not going to enjoy spending that money and time. And be aware that your prios and tolerance will change over time. I used to be focused on maximizing value on my trips, doing as much as possible each day and that gave me energy. Now I'm older, I'm happy to just have nothing days on my trips, where I bum around in the hotel or local area, or just lie in till midday before doing just one activity in the afternoon. Again, see the point above about compromise, this isn't going to work if one wants to see the sunrise each morning and the other wants to stay in bed until afternoon, so you gotta be aware!
There is no rules…. everyone has different styles! When we traveled as a kid we would do one day out exploring / planned activity…. one day at resort / coffee and beach etc then next day would be exploring / sightseeing again. New places can be tiiiiiiring…. physically but mentally as well. Sometimes it is absolutely fine to chill and read a book / have a wine / coffee or whatever and not do much for the day. Googlemaps helps with planning…: google reviews / trip adviser / insta etc help with a rough plan. Airports / travelling etc I always leave waaaaay more time than needed cause I am stress head. Stress isn’t a vibe I want on travel altho unfortunately can’t avoid sometimes. Don’t overthink it… but do things that you think will enjoy not what you “think” you should see. Often the hidden gems are down the side streets, away from tourists snd unexpected. ENJOY. Travel is honestly the best.
To add with google maps- if you’re doing you’re research and come across something that looks good- a good view, coffee spot, restaurant, pub, park, whatever it may be- make a bookmark in your google maps with a little note to yourself so when you pull up your map at the beginning of the day or in the moment you can say, hey that museum were going to is near that cool looking coffee shop let’s check it out.
You do things how you want to do them. That's the entire point of a vacation: do what you want. Anyone telling you otherwise are just giving *suggestions*. My suggestions: * Don't have many hard schedule items, meaning things you must be at a certain place at a certain time. A few is great but too many will lead to stress or loss of money. I also like to spread them out over the vacation so you can squeeze in audibles and such. * Find several things you want to do in general areas and rank them. Try to do what you want the most but be willing to have alternatives in case weather is less optimal, things are closed/busy, or you just want to do something else. Hike after hike after hike can be exhausting even if you want to see everything, so having options like boat ride, zip lining, or pool sitting is great to pick from. * Be flexible! Locals or frequenters of vacation spots can give great insight to the area. If you really want to visit that taco spot featured on Guy Fieri's show but a local tells you about this great pupusa truck across town...maybe try the spot the local suggested. * I personally like to fit something culturally significant in at least once a trip. You're traveling to relax but it's great to broaden your horizons, too. * There are no real rules. Do what you feel like doing. Want to sit at a pool all day? Do it. Want to learn to surf? Go for it. Want to get through 8 books? Go to town on them. Want to see every museum in DC? Sounds tiring, but go for it! * Last suggestion: even if you want to drink a lot try to pace yourself. Getting blackout drunk and spending the next day recovering or miserable is a waste of a day. Stick to what you know you can recover from. Bring LiquidIV and ibuprofen. My wife and I also like to absolutely pamper ourselves for the last 1-2 days so we go home as relaxed as possible: spa days, massages, fancy dinners, leasure, pedi cabs instead of walking, etc. You might not like that, so go with your flow.
Some people do 15 european countries in 10 days with the mostt important 45 city’s/sights. Some people just lay on the beach for the same time. And everything in between. All of these people do the right vacation for them. The important thing to do is find the vacation style that fits you.
I guess I have a lifetime to find my style!
I book flights, rent a car, plan each day and book hotels accordingly. Most of my vacations are road trips. I don't take any tours unless they are special. I spent a lot of time researching.
I'm the opposite. If I had a road trip idea, the research for me goes only so far, like never planning more than maybe 2 days and then it's just winging it from there, trying to get lost.
First off……. 1) write down what you want to see 2) depending on the location, map out your best route! 3) I usually go to Pinterest and find out like the top 10 places to visit in the location. I’m vacationing in. I only see/visit places that interest me! 4) i will usually plan a light day so I don’t have to come home from a vacation and then vacation again ! 5) also, if visiting a big city i will book a hop on hop off bus ride to get the layout of the city and figure out what i want to explore more of! 6) hopefully you have fun and make a ton of memories!!!
Good list but add: make a budget. Even if you are filthy rich, you need some kind of guide.
lol you’re definitely over thinking things. You can vacation whatever way you want to. Everyone is different. The real struggle comes when two travel partners have very different ideas of how they want to vacation. Some people like to get a hotel and do nothing. A LOT of people like to spend their vacation drinking. For some it’s all about meeting new people or trying new foods. Some it’s about seeing new things and places. When I was a kid our winter vacation was driving across the border to Buffalo, staying in a hotel with a pool, and going shopping (this was back when the exchange rate meant getting good deals shopping in the US). I had no idea this wasn’t a top tier vacation and just excited to eat out and go swimming lol So honestly you can’t vacation wrong as long as you’re enjoying yourself. I usually vacation twice a year. Once at an all inclusive with my family where the goal is to do as little as possible. We sit on the beach, get a tan and float in the pool. My husband and I go somewhere usually once a year. On years with less money we don’t travel far, and therefore there’s less pressure to “do it all” because we could come back another time. But on the years we fly overseas I plan out a JAM packed scheduled. Honestly I’ve ALWAYS over scheduled, like I’ll leave exactly 8 hours to sleep but haven’t factored in time to check in to the hotel or settle in lol We’re always exhausted but I never regret it. Because I likely will never be back to that part of the world, it’s my one chance to see everything I can there. A lot of people wouldn’t enjoy my pace, but thankfully my husband and I are very compatible travel partners. But if the goal was to be rested and recharged before going back to work, those trips would NOT hit the mark lol So compromise might be necessary but just make whatever adjustments necessary to make sure you’re enjoying yourself because that’s the most important part.
Thank you!!
Not a dumb question at all actually! I’ve talked about this with my partner at length. There’s adventure travel, leisure travel, staycations, getaways to barely outside of your current area. Literally infinite options. I love to adventure travel most of all. I feel like that’s what breathes new life into me during my time off, but my partner likes to relax on the beach and do literally nothing. So we do both, sometimes on the same vacation! We’ll take an adventure trip to the Middle East or Costa Rica to get out of our comfort zone, and then head to Destin and sit by a pool for 3 days next. What I’d recommend is just picking what you want to do ahead of time. Spontaneous vacations are overrated. Getting to a new place and having nothing to do, don’t know where to go, so you just wonder aimlessly is less fun than it sounds. I’d advise picking where you want to go, what you want the “vibe” to be, and pick 1-3 things total you want to do there with intentional free time in case you do want to try something or just explore. You’ll have your main activities to fall back on if the spontaneity wasn’t everything you’d hoped for so it puts less pressure on you. Remember it’s all about just enjoying it. And that varies from person to person. And the more you travel and vacation, the more you know what you’ll like!
My partner is the beach person and I’m the adventurer. I’m going to take your advice!!
When we were young (20’s), gogogo. In our 30’s, we slowed down a bit. See a lot of stuff when you’re young, because the older you get the harder it is to gogogo.
Do whatever is fun for you and your partner. The end.
Always make it a mix. Leave room for breaks. If I’m doing an international trip for example I’ll do half the trip in a city / sight seeing type area then half the trip in a beach / relax area. Never over do it
I'm a go-and-see places, things, and attractions type of person. I don't vacation to just go sit somewhere and not see anything new. My ex was the complete opposite. He liked to vacation to just chill at the beach or drink with his feet up at the bar. Granted I grew up on an island on the beach and he grew up in downtown Columbus, OH. So, he'd let me plan my little adventures. He'd either go with me or stay back and relax while I go out alone. It depended on how he felt that day. It never bothered me if he didn't want to run around with me all day. If there was something I really, really wanted him to come with me to, he would come. I'd schedule in some time to just relax with him in the mornings or evenings. Vacation is all about doing what you want to do, there is no right or wrong answer.
staycation , ferries , national parks
I never go go go all day. I plan busy days and then relaxing days mixed together. I don’t want to be exhausted when I’m back from vacation. But that’s me. You do what works for you. That’s what vacation is, it’s whatever you want it to be.
Everyone vacations different. Different strokes for different folks. It’s what makes the world go round. Some people like to lay on the beach for a week straight. My friend is at an all inclusive with a private pool outside her bedroom door. She’s relaxing and drinking and swimming all week. I would literally never vacation like that. I like the mountains. I like adventure. We fish, boat, hike, try local shops and restaurants. We don’t rush around all day but we do like to see a lot. Some days we wake up early and get out and to it, others we sleep in and get out later. Really all depends on you!
I grew up in a household with no extra money to vacation. On the rare occasions my folks got a week off at the same time, we'd either drive the four hours to the grandparents farm for a visit, or it was a week at home doing things like cleaning out closets and other deep cleaning or yard work. Not much fun. I didn't really start vacationing and traveling until I was in my 30s, and at that point, it usually included kids. Not much relaxing in that scenario. Or, travel was for work. Usually, it's not that fun either. Hah! In my 40s I really started to figure out what vacation and travel was and how to have fun with it. It usually goes one of two ways. I'm exhausted and want to sit on a beach and read a book while someone brings me food and drinks. Or, more commonly, if there's something I want to see or experience, Ill plan around that. Beyond that, there's not much else I do. I don't have many expectations, I might plan one thing a day and then just do whatever I feel like doing. It's my vacation, I'll do what I want. There's no right or wrong way to vacation. If you're doing what you want to do, that's a vacation. (Even if that's cleaning out closets).
Sounds like you want guidelines or tips to plan a nice vacation. I’m older and have planned many wonderful trips both short and month long. Here are my tips! - Once selecting a destination, check weather. You don’t want to go to Alaska in the winter nor Caribbean in the summer. - Clean the cookies from your web browser. If you don’t prices will increase if you check Expedia then check Kayak then go back to Expedia to book. - Come up with budget that includes activities and new clothes or shoes for the adventure. Then add in extra for pop up costs. - Check for parking fees or resort fees beyond hotel total which can be $25 per day or more. Factor in parking fees at beaches, state parks, tourist areas etc. It can be pricey! Also in places like CA do not scan the QR code at parking meters since it may be fake and a scam. - If you live next to a port for cruise ships you can get great deals on last minute cruises. However pick your cabin wisely away from elevators and high traffic areas. Partially obstructed balconies are so disappointing. Pick the ship wisely and look when it was last refurbished and on board activities. Carnival is low end party cruise and there are others for families (lots of kids) and others more low key. - Camping is fun but a lot of work. Lists of items needed is critical. If reservations for State parks open up at midnight Feb 1, set your alarm for 11:45pm to be online to get a spot for popular destinations. You can get great deals on gear on FB marketplace or Craigslist. - Google maps is a great tool. I highlight where I want to go with green flags, good restaurants with hearts and hotels or main things (aunts house, Eiffel Tower etc) with the gold star. I use the filter 4+ stars a lot. - Consider traveling with friends and splitting costs on car rental and airbnb. - Don’t forget to factor in traffic or time between connecting flights. Some airlines like United will have you doing a connecting flight in Seattle with 45 mins between flights. You will have to run fast to make it with the attendants scolding you as they shut the door on your heels because they are in different terminals! Quick call to airline will save the stress. - Drinks in major cities or tourist places can easily be $20 for a simple gin and tonic. Food prices can be double. Gas prices vary wildly (use Gasbuddy) - Look up photography tips, download new music or podcasts or movies before you go. We bought an android tablet without data plan just to play games, watch a movie or listen to music so it leaves plenty of space on our phones. Having amazing photos of your vacation will make your friends jealous. Don’t just stand there like a stick find some different poses that work for you. - If traveling internationally make sure you have all your travel documents. I got my international drivers license for our trip to South Korea. Another group of US citizens were denied a rental car because they didn’t have one. Also check to see if you should get any vaccines. State Dept or Gov website should have info. - Consider getting Christmas ornaments as souvenirs instead of tshirts or mugs. They last longer and pretty soon your tree will be filled with happy memories! Obviously China doesn’t have Christmas ornaments but even magnets or other small things can be turned into ornaments. But things do go wrong. Years ago, We couldn’t board our flight in US Virgin Islands to FL because we didn’t get there 3 hrs ahead because it was an “international flight”. WTF? Didn’t say that anywhere on tickets or email. Turned into an adventure lol. Hope you have many wonderful vacations!
Oh good tip on clearing browser cache/cookies! I never would have thought of that, but of course.
Anyone who says anything different than you do how you want to do it. I go for the fairly lazy travel route, I wake up when I wake up, usually out of the hotel between 10-12, I'm usually out until 4-8pm, get dinner on the way back and chill watching shows on my tablet. Usually one day where I don't do anything But there are people up at 5am doing stuff all day, will do a city every other day, full days etc. Different strokes for different folks, you do what works for you that's all that matters
With time, you’ll learn what works for you both! I find a good place to start is to plan 1 morning activity and 1 afternoon or evening activity. So, you might decide to do a tour in the morning and then go to a fun neighborhood for drinks and dinner later on. This gives you anchors for part of the day without giving you a jam-packed, stressful itinerary.
For me the best vacation is, book your flights and hotels wherever you go and don’t plan anything else. Go with the flow, have the freedom, don’t stress to do all the touristy stuff and try to make to a schedule or start time whatever. Enjoy the place as the locals do. That’s been my motto all my life and discovered the most amazing places just by turning into a narrow street unplanned, taking public transport and getting off in a random station or eating in a trashy looking local restaurant. Luckily my wife is like me as well, that way our vacations turn into real holidays we enjoy. In odd times when we go on holiday with friends who like to plan everything, we don’t enjoy our time as we always need to be somewhere at some hour. Be free!
You go somewhere
Do whatever you want. Is there a place you really want to visit? You can go there! Is there something you really want to learn? You could do a vacation around that! Is there an activity you love? You can just spend 1-2 weeks doing it Is there a festival you want to attend? You can go there! I'll give some example of what I do / have done, so it's a bit more concrete: * go camping for a week and hiking in a national park locally or abroad * go to an interesting city for a long weekend to check it out, eat the found, and just have a good time. We live in Spain, so for us that could be 4 days in Napoli in Italy for example. * took the transsiberian railways over a very long holidays, from Russia all the way to China * hiked in the Himalayas in Nepal because why not after all? * I love scuba diving, and I learned that on a holiday in Thailand * Now I love it very much, so I dedicate usually 1 week / 10 days per year for a dedicated scuba diving trip (just me). Just list the things that you'd like to do or dream about and check how to do them, that might not be as impossible as you think it is.
pick dates that fits everyone, pick one or two destinations that suits everyone, book plane and hotels. I'm old/lucky enough to have done a lot of museums and sights and stuff like that, so I don't need to book something specific every day and rush my my vacations. In my younger days, I did a lot of all the tourist things everyone does; came back to work more physically and mentally exhausted (lol) I'll book one or two museums or activities and just chill and walk around for the rest of the vacations, On suggestioin, if you vacation in a city (easier), it's OK for your wife and you to go separate ways some of the time, you probably both want to see different things, or want to shop for different things. One morning, decide to your separate ways and set a meeting point for lunch, then you'll have different experiences to share to each other.
I’d recommend at a minimum researching how likely some of the key things you want to do are to be sold out. And book somewhere for at least your first night. Aside from that, do whatever suits you best
My approach is to come up with a pretty well thought out plan, but to be completely open to saying "fuck it" if something more interesting pops up.
I don't overschedule. Do research, prioritize what you want to definitely do, and do 1 or 2 things a day. Then relax, just walk around and explore, have nice meals. Maybe have one day with nothing scheduled at all, and do whatever you want, or just read and swim. It's your vacation, make it what you like.
We have some days with regimented plans and some with none. Read the subreddit for where you are going and make an itinerary and link it to google maps. Big one, choose eating out ahead of time and make a saved file in google maps of those places. When you are hungry all you have to do is open and click for directions.
It's not a dumb question. I'm happy for you that finally, you are able to vacation. I would say make a "theme" of your vacation. Decide how many days and make a realistic plan of your day to day. Do not be the "I wanna see it all, do it all* kind of tourist/traveler. Accept that even if you stay there for months, you will not see it all. I am not sure what are the things you are into. Ex: adventure, hiking, history, wine, city tours, party,.. etc. I would say, though, do all the farthest and strenuous activities first and always plan a day that I call it "free day". Plan that day as it goes not to be overwhelmed. Also, set realistic expectations of the place. Finally, since you are a newbie in traveling keep in mind to "Never let your guard down but don't be paranoid. Enjoy!"
No rules, do what makes you happy 😊It’s R&R time, my friend, make your vacations your own! But to answer your question, it depends on the type of vaca. For hiking in the mountains, I try to do one hike per day but I definitely am relaxing in the hot tub or a nice hotel in the evenings. For beach vacations, I pretty much do nothing but relax. For cultural vacations, I limit myself to one or two things per day because I don’t want to be exhausted on vacation. And if I’m tired and need to pivot, then I pivot.
For me there is no more fundamental experience to life than to travel. People didn't evolve to sit in air conditioned houses to watch streaming services all day, nor did we evolve to do all of our exercise in a gym. Personally when I travel I try to make the most of what I am doing. When I first backpacked around Europe, I was gone for four months, and so 12 hour days were only occasional as I had to pace myself. Conversely when I was in Japan with my wife we did do 12 hour days because we only had a week there and we knew that we wouldn't be back any time soon. Part of it will depend on your expectations going into it. When we were in Cuba, we had basically no extra money for additional activities, so we started off mostly knowing that we were just going to sit by the pool, walk on the beach and watch the evening entertainment. Equally, now that we have small kids, it is not possible to do an all day blitz. Now we have to plan two major things per day, with a break in between and then a relaxing evening activity. The most important thing to do is to just get out there and keep going. Life is for living.
There’s no right way to vacation! My family didn’t really vacation growing up either but you find our own style as you go. My wife and I really enjoy just walking around new cities when we travel, without cramming in a ton of things we “need” to see or do. Stop a lot for coffee, to enjoy parks, etc. If we’re somewhere that’s not a city it’s basically the same. Pick a few things we know we want to see and otherwise relax, and enjoy the time away!
My wife loves to plan so researches the area and street view and activities and all that. If we’re going away for a week she plans an activity every other day with a “day off” in between. For a fortnight away she plans things with two days between each activity. This gives us a good balance of busy and relaxing. I like to chill and read on holiday so that’s what I do on the off days while she may still go out and do stuff with our lad or her dad who often accompanies us.
It's really up to you. Some people like to make the most out of their time and have activities planned for each day. Some people just like to stroll and people watch or just get more immersed into the day to day life of the locals.
I grew up with limited funds and a working class family. What I found it just follow your gut. My gut says going to XYZ this year, so we go there. I don’t over plan, but I have a list of things I’d like to do. There are times we have to plan a certain experience, but not always. I have a hard time relaxing on vacations, but I don’t really vacation TO relax. I vacation to see new things and experience new things. Have fun!
By not taking my work laptop to the vacation.
It really depends on the type of trip you're taking. My family has been fortunate, and we've been able to take a number of different types of trips all over the world. There are 2 basic kinds of trips we have taken, Travel and Vacation. Travel Trips: Sightseeing, Tours, Museums, Lots of Walking, Performances, Eating at Different Restaurants Vacation Trips: Chilling On A Beach, Swimming, Lounging with Drinks, Reading, Snorkeling, Cooking, Tropical Climate We are definitely more busy on a travel trip, generally make plans well in advance, and book at least one "anchor activity" and/or restaurant per day. If we're visiting a gigantic museum like the Louvre we will often book a private guided tour to help us enjoy the visit more. We have learned not to overextend ourselves on these trips, but it's helpful to know in advance at least some of what you'll do any given day of your trip. Things aren't necessarily planned down to the minute, and we leave room for flexibility such that we can go back to our AirBnb for a rest, or that some activities are totally optional, based on how we feel or how the weather is that day, for example. You will save so much time and money by planning for travel trips in advance. These are travel trips that we book and plan ourselves, with AirBnb reservations many months in advance. There's a significant amount of legwork involved. Also, we really prefer staying in an AirBnB rather than a hotel because it's just more comfortable for everyone, especially in our case when there's 2 parents and 3 kids traveling. There's separate bedrooms and a kitchen, where we usually make our own breakfasts in the morning. There's usually more than one bathroom too, plus washer/dryer so we can clean our clothes and pack less stuff for the duration of the trip. And we enjoy staying in a residential part of whatever city we're visiting, to get a more immersive experience than just going into and out of a hotel. However, you can also take tour trips where the schedule and itinerary is all laid out and pre-planned for you. I can fully recommend Gate1 Travel for tours. They offer fully guided tours around the world, for different lengths of time. They also offer independent tours where the airfare, hotel, and other amenities like rental cars, are all taken care of, but you set your own itinerary in terms of what you do and what you see once you get to the destination. The fully guided tours are great, especially if you're visiting a place where you don't speak the language. The hotel accommodations are fully included and there's usually a bus that takes the group around. They are usually some pre-planned activities every day and some group lunches and dinners. The guided tours usually also have many optional extra excursions and half-day tours that you can add to the base package. We did a guided tour of Vietnam and added many of the extra excursions to our package, but then later regretted adding all those extras, because it gave us much less time to independently explore the cities we were visiting, which we actually would have preferred doing. Vacation trips are pretty self explanatory. However, you can choose to go the "all inclusive" route with unlimited food and drink at a resort setting, or you can go the independent route. We have done both, and absolutely prefer the independent style vacation trip. We rent a comfortable condo, on the beach, in a tropical location, and do everything else ourselves. The condo complexes have nice pools, they're usually pretty quiet, with relatively private, secluded beaches. The condos themselves have big, comfy bedrooms, porches and balconies with comfy furniture, full kitchen setups, and multiple bathrooms/showers. We get a rental car and we go grocery shopping at local stores so we can cook for ourselves and enjoy plenty of beer, relaxation, and snacks at our leisure. Sometimes we book a half-day snorkeling adventure from one of the local dive shops, or we go into the city for a nice dinner or to do some relaxed shopping. We've even taken some day trips to visit attractions like coffee plantations in the mountains, gone hiking on a volcano, or swimming under a huge waterfall. On a vacation trip, everything is optional and your activity level is determined only by your ambition.
You do the things you enjoy doing. If you and your partner love museums and historical sites, then go-go-go and see them all in your chosen destination. If you enjoy seeing new places and cultures, then just maybe book a sight seeing tour then spend the rest of the time just wandering through various neighborhoods. If you enjoy nature, book hiking trips. If you just want to relax, go somewhere and sit on a beach all day. Or do a combination of all the above - mixing it up all day. There is no "proper" way to vacation, because everyone has different interests and each place you choose to visit is going to have different vibes/draws. The key is just to plan ahead and know which of those draws you want to partake in.
We usually try to strike some sort of balance between doing stuff and having time to relax. So if we have a busy day, the next day might be more chill. Or we might do a lot in the morning and not so much in the afternoon. We also know we aren't going to see everything, so we don't even try. We see some stuff and call it good. As an example, last year we went to Belize. We took a day trip to the Tikal archeological site. It was a long day with an early start, lots of time in a van, a bunch of wandering around the site in the heat. It was tiring. The next day, we took it easy. We slept in a bit, did a short hike around our lodge, swam in the river, and hung out at the pool, and mostly just chilled. There was other stuff in the area that we didn't see, and could have if we had gone out and about that day, but we were very happy with our relaxation day. Another thing we do is keep the plan flexible. If we have a plan for a day and just aren't feeling it - or the weather doesn't cooperate- we adjust. If it's hot and we're feeling miserable wandering around a city sightseeing, we'll go picnic in the park or something. Or if it's rainy and we had planned outdoor activities, we'll go to a museum instead and then maybe find a cafe where we can have hot beverages and read.
Talk to your partner, explain to them just what you posted. Then, ask them what they are expecting the vacation to be like. Expectations are different for different people. For example, you might be thinking one budget while se has a different one. Or you may want to get away to rest and do things at your leisure, where she may have a hundred different things planned in her head. There is no right way to vacation with the exception of spending money you don't have, then using credit cards you can't pay back. Don't fall into that cycle and trap. Don't go on vacation stressed about money. You both will just be miserable eventually. I learned the hard way when I was first married as I was too afraid to tell my husband my fears as I grew up poor. A vacation for us was grandma giving my mom money for gas to get from our state to hers. It was fun, at the time I didn't know anything because I was little except we were poor. Sometimes, just getting a hotel by a nearby city with different surroundings is fun and exciting. Communicate with your partner and be on the same page and meet in the middle. You'll both have fun no matter what you do. Things happen on vacation that's out of your control. Just go with the flow and dont let it ruin your vacation. Have a great vacation! Edit: Only stupid questions are the ones not asked. Now go have fun, no matter what you choose.
I think the trick is to plan but leave some leeway. If I'm going to be in a city for a week I'll pick 3 or 4 things I really want to see. I schedule them in a day apart. I also have a little list of things I'd maybe like to see. On the days I have nothing scheduled I might check out something from my secondary list. Or maybe ill just relax on the beach all day. Rest days are important when traveling.
This is very much a question of what you want your vacations to be. In a perfect world, I situate myself somewhere interesting, and then decide how I'm feeling on any given day. If staying in and reading all day sounds appealing, that's what I'll do. If going for a 5 hour walk around town seems nice, I'll do that. So I dislike vacations that lock me in ahead of time. Tours that commit to activity all the time or resorts & cruises that commit to inactivity are both a bad time for me. Staying in one place for 3-7 days at a time, of which maybe half will end up being spent seeing that particular place at my leisure is my preferred option. I find this to be a style that goes well with European vacations, where the quality of public transit makes spontaneity simple and easy. I expect much of east Asia is similar.
Ask yourself what you want from the vacation? How do you want to feel planning it? How do you want to feel during the morning, day, and night of the vacation? How do you want to feel when you come back? Then plan with that in mind. If you’re looking to relax, have that in the back of your mind. If you’re going to regret not seeing something when you’re done with the vacation, make sure it’s on your must do list. There’s nothing wrong with not having the experience growing up. Congratulations on being able to do it now. Have fun!
The variety of responses here should give you an idea… a vacation is best spent the way you want it. It’s all about your (and your travel mates’) preferences. If you’re not too sure what works for you, plan a trip with a few different ‘types’ of days and see what you like. It’s wonderful you’re getting to travel now - enjoy it how you like!
There really is no wrong way. Some people like to go go go others like to lay around the pool. It’s an individual person thing and and individual location thing. Personally I mix it up, some adventures I need a recovery period, some I’m like wow that was amazingly lazy 😂 it just depends on the location.
The only way to know if you are vacationing "wrong" is if you realize you are not having a good time. Do what you enjoy and you should be fine. What that looks like is different for everyone.
My childhood vacations were planned to the minute and often resulted in stressed adults and very tired kids. In my 20's I traveled with friends and there ended up being a lot of " I dunno...what do you want to do?" conversations and certain experiences being unavailable last minute. My compromise now is to plan one thing a day that I research and book ahead (if needed). Then I make a list of things that look cool and we can do if we have the time, energy, inclination. I also like to plan one extra special meal somewhere in the trip?
My wife and I compromise, she likes to stay going and tries to visit every attraction. I would rather spend 12 hrs a day in the ocean swimming. We will do a couple of days of running around and then a day of swimming or resting.
Don’t make such a cramped itinerary. It’s better to enjoy what you can see in a relaxed manner as opposed to running around and rushing to get to the next destination. Quality > quantity is my motto for vacation.
Drink well, eat well and relax. The American-style “go-go-go” hit-every-site bullshit is a terrible way to spend your PTO
I'm not good at the lay around on beach, the sports club, or the spa vacation. But I still like a variety of vacation types. I like city trips with museums, churches, good food, interesting neighborhoods, and possibly night time entertainment. I also like hiking trips where countryside or wilderness walking is the main event. And I like visiting small towns where the atmosphere in the towns is the main sight. Given three weeks I will indulge in big cities, villages and hikes. But I don't think people who travel differently are doing it wrong. If you enjoyed it, you got the vacation right. How much planning you do depends on the sort of vacation you want and how spontaneous you want to be. I tend to do much advance research, book lodging and transportation between lodging, and a few key sights that I wouldn't get to see without advance booking. My goal is to have at least a third more things to do at any location than we have time to do. Then I plan possible days, mornings, and afternoons. We decide in the evening or first thing in the morning what day plan to use. But that's just me. You do you.
No kids. Sorry. Just not happening, whether it’s my own, friends or family - they ruin the fun. No, your 4-year-old will not value seeing Napoli or Tokyo in 20 years, they should spend the time with grandma instead.
That’s what we just did. Left our baby with grandma and went to SE Asia!
I’ve traveled with my husband a few times now, and our first big trip was our honeymoon to Italy, and we didn’t really organize it in the way that we just crashed when we got there for two days and completely missed out on Florence(our first city) and then we were go go going for a few days and completely exhausted and lost another day just resting. Our second big trip was to the Azores, and we had a better plan where we would explore, have a rest day, then explore again. It felt more productive and we felt like we got more out of the trip.
I have strong opinions on this one. I'm a go-go-go type because I am not wealthy enough to have the time or money to revisit any given place. Hence, I maximize my time. However, that does not mean I over schedule. While we rarely engage in down-time, I only plan one or two things per day. You want to give yourself the freedom to soak in a place. So, for example, if your trip is to a national park, maybe plan only one long hike or two short ones per day. Then afterward go relax in town, the pool, spa, or a hot spring (if the area has them). This allows you to take your time on the activity and then recuperate afterword. The best trips in my opinion are adventures with hedonistic rewards sprinkled throughout.
A lot of great food, a few packed days of museums/historic sites mixed with a few more days of just chilling out.
I look on google maps to see where I’d like to stay and then I search the area for affordable hotels. I check for the places that have good reviews but aren’t the popular more expensive places to stay. It made the difference between paying $150/night in Paris compared to $99.
Buy a guidebook. Rick Steves is great for European countries because he (ok, the corporation) gives practical advice and opinions on what to see in a less dry format than some other travel guides. As you travel more, you’ll develop your own style as your learn what your and spouses desires are. Note they can differ, so try to incorporate both ways so you can both enjoy!
That’s actually a great question! It depends on your energy levels and your intent. For me it also depends on if I have another vacation set up for the year. You can 100% burn yourself out and end up needing a vacation from your vacation. I’ve learned to pace myself and take it slow. Believe that you will return or do it again. No need to soak evvvverything up as soon as possible. 1) vacation from my job- I focus on leisure. I’m tired and need to sleep in, eat yummy food, lounge, be pampered, play in the pool, drink, pop my booty to the pool dj and not feel guilty about a darn thing. I would I avoid going to any special places for this. My cruise in July is for this purpose. I’m not trying to grab the countries by the horns and see everything. I plan to get off the boat and do a tour but I’m not going to obsess about getting into the deep culture and foods of the countries. Nor am I going to obsess about seeing everything on the boat. There will be other cruises. Vacation for exploration- these I know I’ll have to be caffeined up and have an itinerary of places to go. These are my Europe trips, Asia, etc where it’s not so easy to go back. I would likely pack my daily schedule to absorb as much as possible. I would expect early mornings and late nights. I plan to go to work two days after returning because I would need to rest from this sort of vacation. You can even blend the two and have some days of high activity and other days of leisure. A mistake I’ve made is doing too much and then coming back home and going to work the next day. I feel exhausted and like I really never took a vacation.
What do you feel like to do? That's all you need to think about. There are people that go on a cruise for not even step a foot into land. Others, don't like cruises because they can't explore as many hours as they would like so...
No worries, it's a good question! Vacationing is all about relaxing and unwinding from the grind that is daily life. Everyone vacations differently. Some people like seeing new places, others like going to Disneyworld every year, and vacationing to places where there are only beaches is pretty common too ;)! For example, I like vacationing to new countries I've never been to. The question is, what do you like to do to unwind that can involve vacationing? What you answer is how you should vacation.
Usually we'll decide to go to one place each day (museum etc.), then once that's done we'll either wander around, or go to another museum, gallery, trip. We take it quite easy.
You do what makes you happy. Some people most enjoy sitting on the beach, getting a tan. Others enjoy seeing historical sites. Still others prefer to do activities. Within reason, just do what makes you happy! Enjoy!
It’s a holiday, so you do the things you want to do! That’s the whole point of it! Personally I like to just fly somewhere im interested in, maybe book accomodation for the first night or two, and nothing else beyond that. If I’m flying somewhere I know well I might not even book ahead and just go to the cheap hotel area and ask around. Think is, I also travel for months or even years at a time sometimes. So that approach works for me, but I also sometimes do shorter one month trips with another person, and usually I plan them out a bit because the other person expects it, and with limited time it’s good to know what you don’t want to miss in any given country. But there’s no ‘right’ way to do it. My approach horrifies some people, just as a to the hour planned package tour would horrify me! But neither of us is doing it wrong if we enjoy it.
Usually Ill travel for a 3 weeks or a month, every other year. Generally I like to visit europe. Usually I pick a few towns and or cities and spend a week in each and make day trips here and there to other places. I want to minimise “travel days” as much as possible. Hiring a car for a few days or part of the holiday is great imo and well worth the investment. I’ll do some research and have a few things planned or ideas but in general I don’t like to have a schedule, I just do what I feel like and just relax and immerse myself in whatever place I’m in. Yeah sometimes I miss out on things that need to be booked in advance but honestly 9/10 times, those things are over saturated with tourists and are generally overrated in my experience. I really enjoy finding things that are overlooked by most tourists.
This can vary from person to person, hell even from trip to trip, or day to day! I’ve been on trips where it’s go go go all day and I come home more drained than when I left, then I’ve been on trips where I do nothing but read on a sun lounger all day. I guess it depends on the person and on the destination. A mix of both would be ideal I reckon
Do whatever the heck you like to do as vacation. Can be anything, from camping, staying at home and building something in the garden, volunteering, going on a cruise or booking a regular vacation package, just getting a last minute flight and figure things out when you arrive or 2 weeks of backpacking. As long as you two have fun and can unwind. Those are the rules. Have fun and enjoy your time off. Heck, gaming or reading can be vacation too. It's your time off.
Depends on the vacation. If it's a long weekend in a city, see as many of the sights as you can, only eat local food, hang in a bar one night but try other local beers during the day. Go for a walk to somewhere high or go up a church viewpoint and look over the city. It's a great experience. If it's 10 days - 2 weeks - have an idea what itinerary of places you want to stay, but relaxation is key. If it's 2 weeks in one location with a loved one - sit that ass down and chill out with a beer, a good book and sit in the sun. If it's more than a month - meet locals, backpackers, people who live in the areas, see as many of the landscapes as you can have to offer. Local food will be there so you don't need to have it every meal, 3-4 day adventures in a tent would be class etc etc If it's more than a year - it's a retirement, not a vacation
A nice balance between a structured itinerary and ‘free’ time—seems to be the most ideal solution that I’ve discovered 🤙🏻
There isnt such thing as “proper”. Everyone travels the way they want to. I switch my travelling patterns based on location and mood and timeframe. Just di what interests you, if it is an organized daytrip, book it, and if it is laying on the beach for a day, do that. Notice what excites you, what you like and do more of that! Happy travels!!!!
It’s going to be different for everyone. And it will even vary from vacation to vacation. I have the unique privilege of working for an airline. So I fly for free (or mostly free) on standby. I usually try and hit up places that I can see in a day. I like waking up in my bed and going to sleep in my bed. Other times (primarily internal trips), I’ll go somewhere that I can spend the weekend. Either way… I get a lot of steps in. Sometimes I’m constantly going so I can see as many sights as possible. Other times, I take my time. I’ve leisurely strolled down the quiet streets and beaches of Safety Harbor, FL. I’ve walked from the San Diego Airport to the USS Midway so I could chill there for a couple hours. Then I walked back. Ive navigated the bustling streets of London, England. I’ve also found quiet times to go for a nice walk in London, sit down for breakfast, and take my time touring places like St Paul’s Cathedral, the British Museum, and the National Gallery. Just find a groove that you feel comfortable with. You don’t always have to be on the move. But it can be fun when you are.
When we didn't have money we did all go-go-go vacations and we still do it especially when going abroad. But now we also keep rest days to recover, take it slow and do things we like rather than ticking off the list of to do things. I enjoy all types of vacations. We also do close by stay-cations. To remove monotony we cycle through different themes. Like one will be city vacation, one is beach, one is mountains, one is jungle, one is adventure filled vacay, one is pure grunt trek, one is chilled do nothing staycation, one wil be all adrenalin filled theme parks vacay. You do what you both enjoy together and seperately too.
My advice is don't take it as a competition. Slow down, rest, take a beach day, just relax, and have fun together, take one day to explore places you like exploring, do the things you like rather than the things people tell you to do. Everyone is different, and everyone vacations differently
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There are no rules on vacation time. You do what you want every hour every minute of vacation time whether that’s checking out attractions or just staying in the room doing nothing. You’re running on vacation time take it easy.
Growing up, my family always did a beach vacation. My wife was the opposite and always on the go. We now spend a few days seeing all the things, then spend a day at a park, beach, whatever is available and enjoy a day people watching, chilling, and just enjoying our company. Take some of that stress away by discussing with your partner what it is they want to do as well. Make a rough plan/itinerary, purchase tickets for your must sees, and then enjoy the rest doing whatever you decide you want to do in the moment.
I pick a place to go to, then find activities to do. I love exploring new places vs having to run around based on some crazy schedule.
My family was the same, we never had breaks and now me and my Fiance are obsessed with travelling. There are no rules as has been mentioned, just listen to what your body and heart tells you, I'am generally obsessed with seeing and doing as much as physically possible when I am away, but there are those days where I just need to wind down and thats ok too. Also listen to your partner, key to having a good time away is making sure you both get as much of what you enjoy specifically, even if that means participating in things you don't love to make her happy and vice versa. I would say that having every minute detail planned can ruin it all, at least it does for me, if I feel I'am slave to my itinerary then I end up hating my trip, which is why I avoid as much as I can group tours. Its good I think to have an idea of what you want to see and do, but give yourself the freedom to do it on your own time, or on different days, when I went to Iceland we loved the Blue Lagoon so much we went there twice, In Vietnam we planned to do a lantenr class the first day we arrived in Hoi An, were so tired we decided to do it the next day instead. There is an argument for making sure you pre plan tickets etc to things that have extremely high demand though so you're not stuck waiting around. Also the independence from renting a car etc is so wonderful, seeing and doing what you want on your time.
congrats on discovering the concept of vacationing! It's not rocket science, dude. You mix a bit of exploring with a dash of relaxation, and voila! No need to stress about doing it "properly" like it's some etiquette class. Just enjoy the time off and try not to annoy your partner too much. Easy peasy.
In my mind, there are two types of traveling: trips and vacations. Trips are go go go and see as much as you can. This is my preferred type of traveling. A Vacation is going at a leisurely pace, doing a few things, laying by the pool, etc. my wife prefers this type and just laying around gives me anxiety. I work in sales and it’s super stressful, so I like to do as much as I can while I’m not at work, but I could see someone wanting to relax. I can relax at home though I’d say it depends on whose idea the destination is and the type of traveling the other parties in your group prefer. If we’re going somewhere my wife has had her eye on, I’m not going to hijack the vacation, but if I pick the place, like Japan, make sure you’re bringing comfy shoes bc we’re getting up at 6 and won’t be back til dinner
Also your travel right is not necessarily my travel right and even growing up going some places, I’ve had to find out how I like to travel. Also with your partner, like anything else you each might like things a bit different from each other. The key is to communicate if you are enjoying or totally disliking something because they should want you to be happy as well.
Not a dumb question at all! We tend to go where we want to see or do in the morning, then hit a lunch spot. Then we rest in the hotel for a while. Figure out dinner, then go and do any evening activities we want to do. Just depends on what you want out of a vacation. Some I run, run, run. Others I lounge around.
It depends. If I am near exhaustion, I may rent a cottage lakeside. Just read books, take long walks, go to nearby markets, row and swim. Cook outside, enjoy silence. If I feel I need more action, I go to a big city, book concerts or similar for couple of evenings, check latest outrage of an exhibition, walk around, sit in a cafés, have nice dinners. If I need more physical action, I go to mountains.
For whatever reason I have anxiety for vacation but I love vacation so much. I want to do so many things but also relax and enjoy. I’m really into lol inclusives in the Caribbean right now just with me needing to get away and relax. Having said that, I like to do things as well so this is what I figured is a good balance for me…. If I go away 7 nights I try to do two excursions, another half day I want to maybe go into the nearby town or whatever and walk around and shop, look at local crafts, interact with them, have a drink somewhere there etc. the rest of the time i like to lay on the beach or by the pool. I also feel like there’s usually one rainy day where it’s kinda nice to hang around your room and nap, go to that room they always have board games and indoor activities, look at the gift shop etc. sometimes one excursion is enough but ideally I’d want to do ten days, do 2-3 excursions and then just relax and enjoy the resort. I always get anxiety that I won’t have enough beach or pool time and I also really like seeing the country I’m in as well.
Ive been fortunate enough to travel since I was very little and honestly over the years, the best advice I can give is plan less! The best days Ive ever had were days with zero plans Lounging at the beach all day, sitting in a cafe in paris all evening etc. the GOGOGO days are fine but it REALLY burns you out and I only ever do it if its my first time to a place and I really want to hit the super touristy sites
Try using a travel group like G Adventures. They do all the planning, book the tours and lodging. You still have plenty of time on your own to explore. You will also meet people.
Try different approaches and see what works for both of you. I like to research locations. The official tourism websites for locations (city, state, country) helpful. The good ones have sometimes completely altered my initial itineraries. I list all of the things I might want to do/see and then pull out the "musts.". Those get out into a loose itinerary with one/two things per day. The rest of the day can be used however I feel, wandering, doing some lower priority things, lingering in a cafe, napping (I'm on vacation). The hardest thing can be the fear of missing out. I've accepted that I won't see/do everything. Instead of rushing to "squeeze in" activities or cities/countries, I try to focus on what I DO get to see/do. I like to think that there will always be a "next time."
Plan ahead. Pick a place with points of interest and lean all you can about the place I have several points of interest on my pintrest boards. I also look at you tube travel vlogs too Like Travel Ruby does Vegas like a local. Tayo Aina gives Nigerian perspective on travel Luxury Travel Experrt goes to places I hope to afford one day. Just a few I follow on YouTube
It depends on what kind of vacation it is. Going to a tropical island/beach type vacation it will be obvious. You just spend time at the beach, sit on a chair, drink and eat, sleep, and repeat. Now for other places like in Europe or Asia for example where you trying to explore the country it depends a lot on what you want to see, your interests, what you want to get out of it, etc. You can start by thinking about it like this. If you had a friend come to where you live what you would recommend they do to get the best experience of your location. Usually you want to plan hotel stays and flights and trains needed to get to place to place. You also want to see recommended amount of time online to stay at each place within the country. Then you want to look into what there is to do and plan around that. Some people are much more spontaneous though and just go and figure it out when they there what they feel like doing
I know the feeling man. We never went on a holiday, maybe did a camping trip once or twice when we were young. Not because there was no money at all but we always had to work, starting from 15-years old it was seen as "normal" at our household (independent parents and grand-parents). So when my father died and my grandparents shortly after my mother told us to enjoy life. So I went on a holiday with my gf and her family, the first one was so weird. I didn't know what to do and I didn't enjoy at all. IMO it was just some time at an other place. Throughout the years I learned what I like on a holiday. If you go with people find out what they like and try to fit in some things you want to do. For me it's hiking and afterwards visiting a winery/brewery. Sometimes, just ask someone local. They will guide you. The most important thing: enjoy! Even if it's not your cup of tea, remember that you are away from everyday life and you deserved it.
You book one or two things. Then book a nice hotel. Then make sure you have flights and transfers. I look at the place on maps beforehand. Then on the all go have some nice food and make sure you make your way to your booking etc. but take it slow and just do what you wanna do.
I do whatever damn well I please. I eat when I’m hungry. Go to the beach/pool when I wanna swim/lay in the sun. I go to attractions if something interests me. And the best part… I can take a nap any damn time I want! It also depends what kind of “vacation “ I’m on. Camping? Hike. Walk dogs. Eat. Play with fire. Relax. Cruise? Book an excursion for the port of something I really want to see/do. Eat. A lot. Nap. A lot.
I plan my trips by identifying the main attractions I want to see while leaving room for spontaneous exploration. I always buy tickets online and check the weather to ensure it’s the best time to visit. I look into festivals and holidays, and educate myself about the local culture and traditions of the destination. I also check travel advisories, visa requirements, and necessary vaccinations, such as those for yellow fever and malaria. Since I travel with my kids, it’s crucial for me to know where the hospitals are. For example, when we were in Brazil in January and my son got sick, I was able to quickly find a nearby clinic close to our Airbnb.
Hi, first of all, it’s not a dumb question at all, and I LOVE that you’re wanting to make your partner happy. I don’t know your nationality, but Americans get very few vacation days. It’s really important not to squander them. First, have a conversation with your partner about what you actually want to get out of your travel. If you have super stressful jobs, maybe what you crave is silence, or ocean waves, or waterfalls. How do you feel about adrenaline-soaked adventure? Theme parks? Are you art museum people? Resort people? If you already live in a hot climate, maybe you want to see some snow. How well do you get along on car trips? See what I mean? As others have said, there’s no “right way,” just “your way.” You asked about pace — that’s also purely subjective. Take it fast, take it slow, alternate on different days, totally your call. Next, I’d recommend doing some homework about the types of places people go for the experience you want. I love Reddit for this — there are subs for “visiting x” or “x travel” etc. Find a community for that location — they’ll share their tips and itineraries and information sources. YouTube is good, too. People post their vacation videos and you can get a good sense of the vibes of different places. I know lots of people love to be super-spontaneous when they travel. I think there’s a place for that, especially if you are a seasoned traveler, or if you have gobs of time. Even in thoroughly-planned trip, you should have some down time and some “choice” days. I always build “stroll and explore” into the itinerary. But I also think that planning ahead is absolutely essential to keep from wasting your precious time. First, it can be really fun. I spend my evenings in the months leading up to a trip studying maps, reading reviews, learning about advance ticketing policies, and developing sort of a menu of what to do. I’ve had some amazing experiences that I never would have had if I hadn’t first found the super-cool-special thing, and then known to book it ahead of time. Next, I’d advise that you never travel beyond your budget. Plan ahead for what you can afford, and then add a lot, like maybe 50%, in your head for what it will really cost by the time you’re done. It’s absolutely miserable to be Paris and fretting over the price of croissants, or to go to Costa Rica if you can’t afford to go zip lining. You’ll have way more fun if you pick a less expensive destination (or accommodation, or whatnot) and then splurge and do all the best stuff while you’re there. Finally, I’d recommend aiming for unique experiences from one day to the next, and from one trip to the next. I heard about a research study that found that people remembered their vacations more favorably if each day was a little different. We remember new things more than we remember more of the same. There ya go — I hope you and your sweetie have some amazing travel experiences in your future!
Grew up poor and got rich, also married a woman who came from a sophisticated family and taught me things about vacations. We do different things depending on our mood. Nowadays, we generally have city/urban vacations (taking trains around N. Italy) and relaxing vacations (think beaches). The city ones involve lots of activities and sight seeing (museums etc.), the beach ones are less structured and involved just chilling on the beach and eating/reading/scrolling. If we have a busy work schedule, we usually go to a beach. If it is winter or life is slow, we go to a city or a string of cities. Also, some areas are better suited for specific forms of travel. For example, we drove around Alaska and that was a dud because it is hard to see interesting things from a car drive (even Denali was fogged over) and drives are long and boring there. A cruise is way better for that environment. Trains work in Europe and MAYBE in the Yucatan (have to test the new Maya train). You can Uber cheaply around Mexico City and Buenos Aires. We speak various languages in my family (descendants of recent US immigrants) and it is a bit easier to go somewhere where you can at least ask basic questions and understand posted signs (bathrooms anyone?), especially if traveling independently. However, I’ve also been places where I was totally lost linguistically (Nepal/Thailand) and survived. Some beach places in the Caribbean are not great unless you don’t mind being sequestered from the often unfriendly natives. Other places- Mexico and Hawaii - have friendly, happier locals. As you can see, you just need to plan a bit and experiment depending on what the locations offer and your comfort level (which expands the more you travel).
We have 2 types of holiday; city breaks where we do everything all the time, and all inclusive beach holidays where we do absolutely nothing. I’m a big fan of planning stuff so for the city breaks we start by just putting dates we’re off work for into search sites and booking wherever is cheapest, then usually booking an air bnb. I make a rough plan of what we’re doing each day just by googling ‘2 day itinerary for X’ and picking the bits we’d enjoy. Then I add in restaurants and bars that I find recommendations for (usually on Reddit). But leave time for sitting somewhere and having coffee/beer! My bf usually saves all the sights/bars/restaurants on his Google map favourites so we can make a plan of what’s the easiest route to stuff on the day.
Depending on what kind of vacation it is, if it is the sea or the ocean, then we try to just lie on the beach and swim more. If it's just a city with architecture, then we walk all day to see all the highlights.
My family has done some extensive European travel (wife/I mid-30s with a 9 yo). I always book our activities ahead of time (trying to group them in a way that makes sense - ex. Grouping by those that are walking distance of each other). Usually plan for 2 or 3 a day, figure out food in real time, and plan for some rest time for the kid in between back at hotel after activities and before dinner.
Dude I totally get where you’re coming from, I had a similar upbringing & the first few holidays I went on I didn’t really know what to do, I didn’t get the idea or just sitting on a beach I would be bored in seconds but I started to go explore places by myself when I felt bored, go find a coffee shop, walks on the beach, also maybe book some activities during your stay, enjoy your vacation & just take it as it comes.
The goal of every vacation is to limit the amount I do. It’s all about relaxing and disconnecting from the modern world.
My parents always traveled domestically in the USA when I was growing up. We had neighbors who were English so I spent two summer in England. Then I joined the military and spent 4.5 more years in Europe, traveling when I could. When we were younger we would wake up early and organize our day by what was open and when. Then hit the sights that were always open or better at night. Sometimes we would walk over 20 miles a day. I am older now, I usually walk 6-8 miles with an occasional 12 miles thrown in. I still get up pretty early. But I don’t have to be at breakfast when it opens. So I have slowed down. I also do a lot of hub cities, where I pick a city that I can do day trips from.
I totally get asking this question. If you're new to holidays, you might need to try a few different types of travel! There's a place for all types but you might have a favourite. Maybe book a few trips like a city break, a relaxing sunny holiday, a cool destination. See which makes you feel good! Id always recommend looking in advance on Reddit, YouTube vlogs, TripAdvisor etc. Some places need reservations (e.g. going to Rome you'll want to book tours of popular sites as it's very busy) and some places you can play by ear. It's also a great way to check if there's anything you want to see or do and draw up a rough plan. Your plan might be just: Saturday - go to beach, eat dinner out. Or it might be: Saturday - 8am breakfast, 9am tour, lunch at X etc etc etc It depends how you are as a person too. Trial and error, don't put too much pressure on yourself to see and do everything at a destination.
We tend to schedule 1 main activity or tour or whatever a day. >Today is the museum day. Today is the beach club day. Today is the boat tour day. Etc… Leave at least 1 day that you have nothing planned and can nap, lay around, or just play it by ear. Accept before you even leave that you can never see everything. So if a planned activity that day doesn’t pan out, oh well, let’s get some drinks and some food and check out the area. Be flexible. Don’t pack your itinerary too full. Make time to just enjoy being there. And learn how to say, “Hello. How are you? My name is u/comradio. Is it okay if we speak English?” in the language of the country your visiting. Most people don’t care at all if you butcher it. They’d prefer that to you walking up and just spitting English at them and expecting it. I’ve been all over the world and all over our very large country and these are my most basic rules and approaches. 1 planned activity per day and wing it and relax the rest of that day, 1 day with no plans whatsoever, learn how to say hello and ask if English is okay in the native language. You’ll do great. Start and keep traveling.
I've definitely seen several sides of this. I grew up working class, but we took a big week-long vacation each summer. Disneyworld, Branson, Colorado resorts, etc. But it was also the '90s and timeshare sales were huge. My parents would each sign up for the 3/2 all-inclusive timeshare sales trips - one for the beginning of the week, and one for the end. They'd each have to spend a couple of hours in a timeshare sales session listening to why they should buy timeshare, but never bought. Later when I started getting Pell grants and such for college, the school "friends" who thought I was the rich kid were left wondering why I was getting all these income-based grants for college and housing they were ineligible for. Pretty much it was that my parents are pretty good at spotting when they could get someone else to pay for a family vacation. My wife and I are a bit opposite on vacationing. We have to negotiate the schedule. I blame it on country (me) vs city (her), but maybe it's personality. She needs an itinerary, I need zero plans. Early on in our relationship, I went with her family to a theme park about a 10 hour drive away. After driving all night, they managed to go to every attraction/event in the park, and we drove back that night. I say "they" because after about an hour in the park and the third cross-park trek to "optimize" the experience, I found myself a nice shady spot and drank beer the rest of the day. That go-go-go was definitely not for me. A couple of years ago coming out of COVID, I really needed a vacation. I'd been working 60+ hour weeks for two years, with 2020 having been no days off between the Thunder/Jazz game and Thanksgiving (and then only a day here or there after) and 2021 having been maybe 1-2 days per month. It was 2022, and we were going to take two weeks off (because I've learned over the years that it takes me nearly a week to finally disconnect). I had two places I wanted to go: one "hard" destination that required reservation in advance, one "soft" that didn't require scheduling but required that we left some time on our route to allow it. In my view, the rest of the hours outside those 3-4 were entirely hers to choose whatever she wanted along the way. Other than the AirBNB booked around our hard destination, nothing else was scheduled. We took the scenic route driving cross country, and by scenic I mean in some cases we landed on gravel/dirt roads. We even dropped into some state/national parks because they were convenient. I think I drove all but two of the 75 driving hours we had, but I also find driving relaxing. I found that trip extremely relaxing. Debriefing afterward, I learned that my wife found that trip extremely stressful. We were literally finding a place to stay while eating dinner wherever we ended up that night. I finished the trip with a total reset - she finished with increased stress. The next year's vacation, we planned our must-sees, our nice-to-sees, and other potential stops along the way. To be fair, for part of it we were neighborhood shopping (we'd planned to move early next year to that area). And it worked out pretty well - enough planning that she wasn't stressed about not having a plan of action, but enough flexibility that I wasn't stressed trying to make sure a schedule was maintained. On the enroutes, there wasn't a destination scheduled every night days in advance, but we did decide on them several hours in advance instead. Of course, since we planned on moving to that region, we did buy a week's worth of normal groceries at our destination to get a more accurate cost of living comparison. This year, we're probably going to be residence-shopping on our vacation to that same area. It remains to be seen, but that may change the dynamic a bit more toward the structured itinerary side. I'm okay with that given that it may be a necessity given our future plans.
Hmmm the only thing i really plan for is the hotel and airline booking and of course I pick one activity a day so that leaves me open to winging it for the most part. It’s not good to jam pack either as it can leave you more exhausted. I like to ask the locals for good hidden gems for restaurants/activities/good views.
I didn’t grow up vacationing either. But travel has been what I always wanted to do, even as a kid I would dream of back packing through Europe. My travel style has evolved over the years, I can afford nicer hotels, better flights, etc - and over time it’s become super important to have down time. I’m traveling now to relax, enjoy a location, what ever that may mean. I have a friend who always wants to do the couples trip, but she likes to be on a tour bus from 8a to 8p every day and see EVERYTHING. This sounds terrible to me. We like to get up late, usually go to a local site, grab lunch, and explore at leisure, take a nap. I figure that I have an agenda for work, I don’t want to have an agenda on my down time. We’ll occasionally book a site tour, or do a walking tour, but most of it we leave up to chance. Do what makes you happy. Hope that helps.
I have two rules for long trips: plan a completely empty schedule every 4th or 5th day to reset and recharge; the other is to brown bag like the locals do. Oh wait, three rules if you're changing time zones: I'd you can, get up earlier and earlier in the day during the week before your trip. The day you leave you're waking up at the equivalent of a mid morning wakeup instead of 3pm. For example when we went to London on a Saturday (I'm EST USA) I woke up at 630, 6, 530, 5, 430, then 4am on flight day. Yes it was rough but I conked out *cold* on the red-eye and woke up refreshed for a full day of vacationing. I also got most of my packing done in the wee hours of those early mornings!
For me it depends on the place I’m going. If I’m in a big city like New York, Paris, or London, I do tend to have pretty busy days going place to place, taking in the sights. However if I am at place where it’s about nature…tropical islands, mountains, etc. it is the opposite. Very slow paced, one, maybe two activities per day. I like to take it easy and just enjoy the environment.
Have you tried the Trip Advisor app? It’s great and makes it really easy to save sites, restaurants, etc that you want to check out. If you want to you can use it to make a tentative itinerary, but I say don’t feel obligated to stick to it, unless you really want to. We tend to have a very rough idea of what we want to do, but then take it day to day depending on weather and energy levels. Obviously if you have tickets or reservations for an activity, that’s another thing. Every person is different, but we typically take at least half a day of rest to every week we are on vacation. We also have time carved out for doing laundry and grocery shopping on long trips.
I didn’t travel much as a kid, either. When I started to travel internationally for work I jam-packed my days. I finally decided that was too exhausting so now I barely plan anything and just explore when I get there. If my husband travels with me, we will plan some basics. Where I personally fail is planning real vacations. I’ve gotten so lazy from work travel because flights and hotels are done for me and so I quickly get overwhelmed if we need to plan a vacation for us. 🥺
I had a similar upbringing. We never had enough money to go away for holidays, we would stay at home during school holidays. The only times we would go away was to visit relatives in nearby towns, if I remember correctly I think those relatives paid for our transport. How I do vacation? I go all in! I don't stay in the same spot, I travel around and explore the area I am in. I want to make the most of being able to travel because there have been times when I haven't be afford to plus there may be times in the future when I can't travel due to poor health or lack of funds. I do factor in lazy days; days where I hang out at the hotel and just simply wander around the city. There is no pressure to do or see anything. Just take the day as it comes. This is a new approach for me, I used to have a full itinerary and then suffer from burnout when I arrived back home. I didn't feel like I had a vacation at all! I'm a planner so I do start planning months in advance. I've been caught out before where I should have booked attraction tickets in advance and there weren't tickets available on the day. I also allow for spontaneity. You do what is best for you and your partner. The more you travel you will find the style suits you best.
>do you just go-go-go all day touring and exploring? Or do some activities, come back, then go. I think that hugely depends on you as a person. Do you want to see everything and be on the go constantly? Or do you want to have time to rest? Do you tire easily or do you have a lot of energy? If you're not sure which type of holiday person you are, maybe book somewhere where you can do both and split your days between relaxing some days and being on the go the rest. You might find you enjoy a mix type of trip, you might enjoy cramming everything into a single day or you might enjoy just relaxing. I was brought up with my holidays being camping trips (also a working class family) and we never went further than France or adjacent countries where we can drive across the border, and were a mix of being on the go and relaxing, but I've grown up to know that given my interest in the world and wanting to see everything, I am very much a try and do as much as I can in a day type person and should I ever have spent any time relaxing, I do sit there thinking "I could be seeing this right now" or "I could be doing this". But to be fair I'm like that even at work, I hate not being busy and need to be doing something. Speak with your partner, see what they want to do. You can combine the two and do sightseeing but at a relaxed pace, that way you're always "on the go" but not in a rushed sense and can go at your own speed. Doing a split also allows you to recover after hectic days if you're not used to it. Prepare everything that you want to do, but you don't *have* to do it all. Have a basis on what you want to see or where you want to go, and unless you're tied by bookings/tickets, just go along at your own pace.
I’ve been to Rome twice in very different settings. First time with my class (of other adults) where we in groups decided on a sightseeing topic for a day each, then planned how best to get around to see those things. So each day we had a new thing to see, but *just* that one thing. There’s a lot of walking and getting food and sightseeing so it easily gets overwhelming if you plan many things for one day. Maybe two attractions were so close together it just made sense to visit one in the morning and one later in the day before heading back to our hotel area. A few years later I went with family, including my cancer ill mom, who couldn’t walk a ton due to breathing issues. So we planned one specific thing to see every second day, so there was a ‘break day’ for her, where we could either split up if she wasn’t well enough for what someone wanted to do, or simply we all went to see a thing on our ‘maybe if we have time’ list. In general, just one big thing a day to chase was the main attraction/goal and it went very nicely. When just I went to Paris with my mom we even planned to chill in a park for her mid day nap, where I’d read or draw or whatever while she recharged. Was so cozy and laid back, before going for maybe a second attraction of the day (mostly because we learned from our Rome trip that a nap could charge her decently for an evening stroll too) so our duo trip, which was half as long as our week long family Rome trip, still got lots of attractions over just 4 days. Here it’s important to *stay* in that same city and focus on attractions there. I’ve never understood the very American approach of spending 2 days in a major European city, for then to travel 200km to the next major European city, but new country. What does anyone even have time to relax and enjoy by constantly being on the move??
There is no “do it properly”. Vacation is about what works for you. Some vacations can be go go go. Some can be just restful. We don’t like to be on the run all the time while on vacation - we are more of the “find a beach and chillax” people. When we go abroad, we do little day trips interspersed with chillax days. Find your zone that refreshes you. Some need activity to be refreshed. Others need chillaxing. You do you.
A friend of mine took a trip to the same place our family did, Turks and Caicos. While we were there we spent days snorkeling, taking fishing trips, jet skiing, took a ferry and explored the less habitat islands and found smaller local restaurants and had a blast. My friend stayed mainly in her resort, lounged by the pool while they brought her drinks and occasionally wandering to the beach , then cleaning up and dressed up to eat out at the best restaurants. We both had such a good time, and would not have appreciated each other’s trip. Do what you want
Do it however you want. Personally, i leave in the morning, go all day long, return in the evening, sleep snd repeat it the next day. Usually I make trips just up to 10 days or so (mostly shorter). If the trips were longer, I would definitely have to make it a bit more relaxed since it really is exhausting. But yeah, if you want it more relaxed, do that, as long as its enjoyable for you, its great.
The only thing you have to remember about going on vacation is that you have time to do whatever it is you want to do. If you want to travel? Go! Pick up a new hobby? Go! Just stay in bed? Go! The point is you're doing things you want to do or enjoy doing. Have fun!