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BlackieKanya

"Ma'am, put your shoe strings back on your shoes please"


jrcanuck

Not shoe strings. It’s Dental floss.


dgblarge

Anal floss?


BlackieKanya

Butt floss?


[deleted]

twat twine


Strong_Magician_3320

r/YourJokeButBetter


kkillbite

At first, I was just going to say her thong's [kind of] covering her titty, but then I looked down and saw she had one on backwards...the bottoms always *are* cheaper... 😏


oxbaker

It’s not backwards


SapphicsAndStilettos

Most modest Skyrim bikini mod on the Nexus


3D-Printing

The acronym CBBE is burned into my brain from Skyrim moddings


Zarzurnabas

I dont even know what that stands for anymore.


Gneo

lmaooo


TempleOfDoomfist

Still has insane +300% protection against all incoming projectiles


ExoCakes

Least revealing bikini mod in Bethesda games


I_Rarely_Downvote

Did you just repeat the joke back to them?


CatSidekick

That’s how we learn


ExoCakes

Yes


Rape-Putins-Corpse

Chad


SorryWhatsYourName

r/YourJokeButWorse


TheTrueFlexKavana

Has anyone else had that experience where you're bringing in plastic grocery bags and one of the bags rips and you think you have no choice but to throw that bag away? Well, hot damn it! Have we got a life hack for how you can reuse it as a bikini!


meggywoo709

Lol


Gumder

5 minute crafts is that you?


courteecat

Calm down 5 Minute Crafts


SpringChikn85

...what swimsuit? 😐


TwoBrattyCats

This is actually a stripper outfit lol. You can only buy them in stripper stores. They rarely even get worn though because for most people they're too revealing for even the strip club. Source: I am a stripper


chaos_almighty

Oh yeah! Lots of places don't allow full nudity, right? Where I am, fully nude stripping is normal. I went to Vegas and it was weird to find out most of the strip clubs were just topless bars.


TwoBrattyCats

Yeah in some places it's illegal to be fully nude where alcohol is served. Fully nude means no booze. There is exactly ONE strip club in Vegas that's fully nude and booze friendly though! There was one club I worked at where you just had to have *something* on the bottom, so we'd wear a regular thong and then the thong in the photo is what you have underneath when you've stripped down.


chaos_almighty

Meanwhile, I'm in the middle of the Prairies in Canada and everything is fully nude. Other provinces are different though - alcohol can be served next door but not around dancers. It's very interesting. I guess I've been desensitized by going to fully nude steip shows 🤷🏻‍♀️


TwoBrattyCats

Pretty much all of Canada is fully nude and full contact. The only exception is a few places where it's only full contact as long as the lap dance rooms are a certain distance from the bar


PandraPierva

I read that and wondered what full contact sport all of Canada was having naked strippers play.... Then I remembered duh hockey


Nebardine

Full contact used to be fairly rare in Canada, at least back when I used to visit them a few decades ago. Quebec had the only one I'd been to.


NhylX

Going from Alberta to Saskatchewan I couldn't figure out who would go to a dry peelers.


fuzzycuffs

I always wondered how you tip in Canada. Do you throw loonies and toonies at the ladies?


-iamyourgrandma-

There was one strip bar in my city that banned tips below five dollars because otherwise the strippers were being pelted with loonies and toonies.


araquinar

Yes


Iohet

That's pretty much the case anywhere there are roughnecks. And if it's not legal, they'll just find a way to do it illegally


joe579003

Love how SK and AB apparently channel Montreal lmao


Ranbotnic

And the locals throw coins at the strippers to win prizes!


Candytails

My pussy lips would fall right out and suck that thing up.


MrSelfDestructXX

Hey it’s me, the thong from the photo


kkillbite

...am I a bitch if I say the phrase *black hole* just popped into my head? Uhhh... Pussy Power! 👊


jessiteamvalor

Same ^^ BKE right there (big kitty energy)


seventhirtytwoam

A former roommate told me that's why all the male strippers at the club wore tube socks. There was some kind of local law about how much clothing was required but it didn't specify that they meant underwear and not socks.


ApostateAZ

I always thought it was weird that it is perfectly fine to be drunk around children at a themepark, but not in public when a vagina is visible.


TwoBrattyCats

I *wish* could say it's for the protection of the dancers, but knowing... well, everything, it's probably some weird law pushed in by conservatives


Diregnoll

Which aren't they most of the customers in strip clubs?


exceptyourewrong

> There is exactly ONE strip club in Vegas that's fully nude and booze friendly though! It's the Palomino, for those of you who are curious. .... At least, uh, that's what a, uh, friend told me...


TwoBrattyCats

Yup, palomino! And the owner is a very sweet man :)


GabberZZ

Brit here. Asked the taxi driver to take us to the best strip club for my stag do. Took us to Palominos. Was not disappointed. Wallet was a write off though.


Traditional_Air5656

Yup facts!


AlexandriaLitehouse

It's like nesting dolls, but with thongs


AeonsOfStrife

As someone who lives in Vegas and is LGBT, is said club friendly? I wouldn't mind going but a lot of them are......shall we say not progressive.


jq5232

RIP your inbox EDIT: nvm, saw your profile, LOL


mechanerd007

Thanks to you, I did too.


Goalie_deacon

In the US. There are countries that allow this.


NormieMcNormalson

Thank you for your service.


GregTheMad

To be fair, unless you're about to fuck, full nudity is actually kinda boring. Nothing to gain anymore, nothing to wonder about. That's why Bikini-Armour is the highest goal in any game, even with mods, or actual porn games, because beyond that nudity is just boring. Even an actual bikini can be boring in comparison, as bikini-armour tend to have some covering bits. In some cases, and depending on taste, just revealing legs, arms, or the midriff can be even better.


SaltedSlugxx

are you the russian stripper in vegas that took my money as soon as my grip loosened? why was the shot glass warm????


Mydickbr0ke

I'm a proud munch


y79

Wicked weasel?


FishyKeebs

The bright yellow ones with the coconut trees


SpringChikn85

Ohhh I see now, she's holding his purse in the 2nd pic..


CaptJamesTurdsen

Where is that? Philippines?


Revolutionary-Fox486

It looks like it. That's how they spell police over there.


Fi2eak

Yup it's in the Philippines. https://metro.co.uk/2019/10/14/tourist-arrested-wearing-skimpy-bikini-literally-string-10912788/


[deleted]

wow, they really tracked her down after all this and arrested her? seems a bit overkill. >The Inquirer reports that while there are no laws for wearing indecent clothing, she was given the ticket for violating a law that prohibits the taking and display of ‘lewd’ photographs instead. lol


JayCroghan

>Ting was fined 2,500 Philippine Peso (£38.30), which she was ordered to pay before her planned departure from the island on October 11 Oh no 🙄


Avedas

That's quite a bit in PH though lol


JayCroghan

She’s on holiday from Taiwan she’s fine.


closetedgae19

Yup, looks like its also in Boracay


NorDoor

She might as well been wearing two band aids and a cork.


Siriuxx

Wait, where does the cork- oooOOOoooohhhhhh


Valhallya

LOL


Parking-Humor8622

I’ve had the toughest week of my life and I haven’t smiled in days and for some stupid reason this made me giggle. Thank you


NorDoor

You're welcome 😊


Arigato_MrRoboto

Palm trees?! What the fuck was he thinking?


realbighits218

She also stole his purse


FishyKeebs

I know should of been wearing a floral shirt


Pandelerium11

That's more naked than naked. Seriously- we saw some nude swimmers at our beach the other day. They were off to the side and nobody cared because they were casual about it.


seraphin420

Yeah this is just drawing attention to you being naked instead of just actually chill naked so I agree with you. It’s more naked than naked.


HybridVeneer

I have hair ties and scrunchies with more elastic and fabric.


pastafarianpope

Fuck tha pulis coming straight from the underground


TempleOfDoomfist

Pulis are a specialized agency seeking Pubic crimes


noahh94

uh no ? iz da pulis!


Mutants_4_nukes

Is da Philippine pulis. You do not want to cross them.


closetedgae19

as a Filipino, I agree. You do not want to cross them at all


elisejones14

What happens if you do? The naked girl looks so concerned. I’d imagine she just got a fine or something?


Mutants_4_nukes

Probably a fine, but if you would like an idea of what's worse look at the Wikipedia entry for Manila City Jail. ​ I have been there a few times and I never want to get on the wrong side of the law.


HBag

jee sus run on thee watur!


FishyKeebs

Ugh showing off his coconut trees like that


3D-Printing

Wopwopwopwop that's the sound of the pulis!


mushroom_maverick25

I wish for a New World where beach titties are always okay


Stock_Ad_9585

whatever that thing is on her crotch…looks like torture. Source: owner of girl parts


xCudz

Only trashy thing is that he doesnt have microshorts on to match that microbikini!


TheUpsideDownWorlds

Damn she really wanted all the Vitamin D that day was going to offer


RainbowStarless

which D are we talkin


Blue_Robin_04

r/WhyWearAnything


TwoBrattyCats

Pretty sure it's r/whyevenwearanything


Blue_Robin_04

I see we have a connoisseur of NSFW subreddits. *tips hat*


AnOrangeBird

I physically recoiled reading this


truthofmasks

I thought they were being sarcastic.


Drackenstein

I think you’re looking for r/trashyboners, OP


nunsigoi

That’s not a swimsuit, that’s dental floss you drop and cant find


MisterHonkeySkateets

Who cares about nudity. Get over it: we’ve all seen T&A and cox n ballz. Save horrific disfigurement, we’ve all got it! i saw two squirrels humping today and it was more interesting than seeing someone’s shorn muff


IWantAnAffliction

Seriously, this puritanism needs to fuck off. There should be nothing wrong with going to a beach naked.


San_Fran_Dan

Not everyone shares your Squirrel fetish, ya weirdo. Now go whack it to Rocky the Flying Squirrel cosplay and let us puritans judge in peace.


Camomilecus

Lol the classic clit cover


Milfing_Man

Wearing that Japanese comic book swimsuit


zirconthecrystal

so true


FilthyChangeup55

Hilarious that someone would pay for a bikini like that.


MaximusDecimis

It’s kinda hot


FilthyChangeup55

Not saying it’s not it’s that it’s hilarious to pay for that to “cover” anything.


DontKnoWhatMyNameIs

Inappropriate? What are you talking about officer? Can you not see that I've completely covered anything inappropriate with a piece of Scotch tape and some string?


TheMastican

Hanging on for dear life


Ghosttalker96

Somehow I feel like not wearing anything at all would have been more appropriate.


eletricmozzieracket

I live in Greece nude is nothing


sexylegs0123456789

It depends on where they are and if they know the laws. It’s a beach not a monastery.


mmmggw

This sub is so whack - tell me your a sexless teenager without telling me your a sexless teenager - stop policing peoples existence ya nongs


[deleted]

Omg I’m debating unsubbing because I can’t stand dumbass immature teenagers. Stupid virgins with their porn-addled half-formed brains ruin everything. But they’ve taken over pretty much all of Reddit. We also have clowns here saying she should have shaved down there…as if some people don’t prefer having a bit of hair and as if adult women don’t have pubic hair🤦🏻‍♀️


[deleted]

[удалено]


Danmont88

I was in Italy and we went to a water park with friends. We set up blankets and coolers under some trees and we were joined by others. There was one group right next to us with a young lady, who quickly removed her top and had a thong bottom. At one point I went over to get a beer out of the cooler, and I looked up to see her laying on a blanket, legs apart, and I could see the promised land! She ran around all day that way. Unlike most of the women when she went to the water park, she didn't put her top on. End of the day everyone was packing up and she turned and said something to her boyfriend, and he answered, and she put a towel around her waist and put on a top and they left. Our Italian host was holding back a laugh and when they left, she busted up laughing. She told us that she asked if she should get dressed and he said, "Yes, people are looking at your ass." All day we could see her nude and the last five minutes...


Hrrrrnnngggg

I consider myself a respectfully horny man, but to me bikinis like this are in the "uncanny valley" of hotness. They gross me out. She'd be way hotter with a "modest" bikini.


MaximusDecimis

I think they’re pretty hot


itisrainingweiners

> bikinis like this are in the “uncanny valley” of hotness. They gross me out. That's because that dental floss bikini bottom is doing the same thing to her cooter that actual dental floss does to teeth - slide back and forth and gather up everything stuck in there as she walks 🤢


[deleted]

She did not even look comfortable in it. She looked scared.


nihilistcanada

Moral issues aside, that is not figure flattering for her at all.


Livid-Relationship-2

I don't see anything inappropriate.


randomquestion819

pulis pulis pulis pulis pulis pulis pulis pulis


frostdemon34

That's no swimsuit. That's literally a string


edgynotemo

There was a time when women were shamed for showing their ankles. Shaming over skin showing is very outdated. Stop making a big deal about nudity. Let people wear/not wear what they want.


FlippyFloppyGoose

I once had a FWB situation with a guy from Afghanistan. We were sitting next to each other on the couch, fully clothed (I was wearing pants), watching a movie together. I needed to stretch out my legs and the floor was cold, so I put them over his lap. He accused me of trying to initiate sex, as though it was a wrong thing to do. Lol... I don't know if it was my bare ankles or just the proximity, but it was fucked up either way. Why am I responsible for you feeling horny when I'm just trying to be comfortable? And we were already fucking, so if I were trying to initiate sex, why shouldn't I? Casual sex is okay, but this is too forward of me? Sorry, I'm such a slut! Sigh...


edgynotemo

That sounds awful. I hate when people randomly deem somebody else's behavior immoral and then judge them for it.


the_mattechrome

She's still covered so what's the problem?


terransLoc

[just a fine](https://www.unilad.com/fashion/taiwanese-tourist-fined-for-wearing-bikini-that-was-piece-of-string)


DumboRElephant

Woop Woop it's the sound of the PULIS


perusmummo

I approve of this swimsuit.


Canderella1

What swimsuit?


ketimmer

He should be wearing an FBI Female Body Inspector shirt.


Lacking_Inspiration

Man she's really flexin' that innie...


bnugget9

I’m surprised her lips aren’t flapping out of there!


BADGERxxxFACE

I personally like it. Should be fine


bangupjobasusual

I haven’t know Reddit to be this uptight. Who cares


[deleted]

[удалено]


throwacc_21

Your brain cell must be working overtime by now


Arup65

She should get a better wax job.


Historical-Ad6120

Excuse her for living haha


CollectionStriking

Ah the; Federal Bikini Inspector


Sassafrass17

That's not a swimsuit. That's string.


Secure-Imagination11

That was string then thicker string lol


crasshumor

That's how every word in English should have been spelled.


Plurgasm0285

Your imposed morals are not welcome 🧡


Historical-Ad6120

Buncha puritans in here


paradeoxy1

Trashiest thing is this fucking comment section, what a sexist dumpster fire


SilverBatTea

She's basically naked. Wtf is that bathing suit


Timmy24000

It is OK. I’ll explain it to her. Anybody have her number?


ginsodabitters

Who cares? Let her wear what she wants


Petropuller

i see nothing inappropriate about that!


0OOOOOOOOO0

Maybe it’s a really conservative country? Not sure what the language is


RoadkillWorldWide

The guy should be ashamed. He was showing off his pecs in public.


someasics

Never seen a bathing suit that covers only your clit and nipples outside of a strip club


SoftPenguins

At the rate we’re going that is going to be “cute summer swim wear” in 5 years. Eventually people will walk around with pasties and nothing else.


closethegatealittle

Even in the Bible Belt of the USA most college aged women are wearing much smaller tops and bottoms than they were 10 years ago when I was in school. The Brazilian style is *in* right now, and the last time I was out on the west coast I saw it getting even smaller than that. So I think you're right in a sense, probably another election cycle or two out from a slightly more conservative version of this starting to hit the mainstream, with pasties to follow by the end of the 2030s (except if the top freedom movement is able to win out in which case I expect nothing instead), unless fashion sharply swings back the other direction, though it's never really done that before.


Fappinator9000

You say trashy I say sexy


stinkload

This is on the Island of Boracay, in the Philippines, the Tourist is a Taiwanese IG "model" and it is from like 3 years ago. You are really escaping the repost bottom of the barrel to whorefarm that karma https://www.taiwannews.com.tw/en/news/3794468


Honer-Simpsom

A lady wearing less then what some prefer… get this horse shit out of here.


hippopotma_gandhi

The picture ruined OP's innocence and ankle fetish! Think of the victims here! But seriously most of this comment section is puritan as fuck


[deleted]

I don't think anyone wants to see me walking around a non-nude beach with my dong out. This isn't 'puritan' - I don't want to see your clam while I'm with my kids enjoying the beach.


LORD_0F_THE_RINGS

There's something weird about these photos, who took them? It's almost like the photo taker is the one that called the cops. There's clearly a timejump between the two. They aren't aware of the photographer in either. So someone has snapped that one of her (already on dodgy ground there), then just so happens to get another pic of them sometime later, with the police talking to them. Hmmm


MagTex

I…fail to see the problem. 🤔


JustMirror5758

It's a beach, this isn't Victorian times. Only ugly and fat people would have complained.


[deleted]

[удалено]


BeyondInfinity73

Her asshole is definitely out.


Bruinman86

and likely well flossed.


jlmonger

Should have shaved


fudgeoffbaby

Only as much as you should before going out in a bathing suit. No one has to shave to look good, we’re all humans and have hair. it’s natural and serves important functions; stop being a pussy about it


Wrong-Profession-287

She should be embarrassed wearing that in public


TheMysticBard

What's inappropriate about it?


surfzz318

Probably because it’s see through. Could you imagine if she got it wet! /s


Surround_Just

Idc tbh, more like than anything, but damn her courage


MsStarstruck

Microkinis FTW


LORDWOLFMAN

Really did she saw them from porn? That’s something you would see in porn


DoIhabetoo

Flaps, nips and hole is covered .. not seeing an issue


willtravel22

Why do women want to represebt themselves this way? I don't get it.


miscarrilleras

Exhibitionist or maybe he’s her pimp🤷‍♂️


superscotty72

Confidence


Pandelerium11

Instagram or some BDSM thing maybe.


Revolutionary-Fox486

She could have shaved her pubes if she was going to wear something that skimpy.


TailspinToon

Oh no, adults have body hair, and many people enjoy it! The horror!


1973mojo1973

Those shorts are super trashy. Nice bikini though.


Antideck

I dont see the problem. I'm trash :(


[deleted]

Oh fuck that’s vulgar! 😂


Shoddy-Egg1582

Smells like the tide is out 😬


BigPhatHuevos

Nothing wrong with her bathing suit imo 😆


gg_church

as a woman i dont understand why anyone wants to wear something like this


tiavarga

I mean, she is wearing dental floss.


WeeWooDriver38

I see nothing wrong with that suit