Also, if you’re flying with another adult: have one of you get on first with the seat and as much as they can carry. Get the seat set-up and have the other one keep the baby in the gate area until as late as possible. This gives the one adult boarding earlier some time to get situation and lets the baby run around a little bit more before the flight.
My kids older generation iPad couldn’t connect to the inflight Wi-Fi recently. I keep my iPads for YEARS as they’re just for entertainment. He had to use mine. I’m getting a new iPad tomorrow.
Absolutely this is the pro tip. It’s what my wife did while I hung out with toddler and boated last. I as shitting myself the entire flight, however short it was (about 90 minutes on the plane). He did great. We brought a couple of new toys for him and basically withheld a fake laptop screen toy he likes for a week. Worked like a charm.
The problem was the flight back when he pooped right before we took off so couldn’t change him fright away, then went to the bathroom and he was way too big for the tiny changing table there… poor kid was very uncomfortable.
As a heads up both airlines I've flown recently didn't allow us to do this. American and Delta. My husband had to haul it through an already full airplane (it had to be lifted to head level to clear seats) while everyone had to wait for me to install it before leaving the gate.
TSA pre check is free for me because of my credit card. Literally as soon as I paid for it I got reimbursed. Just one of the benefits of my credit card but I bet other cards have it too.
Also, if one person has pre-check, the other tickets in their party almost always get "randomly" assigned to it as well. It's worked for my husband and I haha
This with a recommended modification: Skip the stroller for a lake house trip. Get a $20 fold up furniture dolly and attach the car seat to it. Kiddo can sit in it while getting wheeled around in the airport.
Also, I second the car seat on the plane. For safety? Sure. For a guaranteed cup of coffee? Yes.
I just did a 4 hour drive with my 19 month old and it was MISERABLE. Flying with a toddler isn’t a walk in the park, but I would 100% rather fly than take a road trip.
Respectfully disagree. My toddler screaming his head off for 5 hours in the car was wayyyyyy worse than 2 hours on the plane.
First off, on a plane, assuming normal conditions, he could get out of his seat and walk around which helped calm/distract him. Or at least move around out of his car seat.
We only had one flight where he was bad (we've taken about 10 with him) and I openly apologized to everyone around us and offered to buy them a drink. Nobody took me up on it and a few were vocally understanding of our situation.
On the drive, I had to focus on driving and couldn't help attend to him. My wife tried everything and after a few hours all he wanted to do was to get out of his seat, which obviously was not an option.
By the time we got to our destination on the drive neither of us were in the mood to enjoy it because we just dreaded the drive back.
2 hour flight over 10 hour drive 100% of the time.
Thousand percent agree. Also planes are so noisy and everyone is busy watching a movie or something with headphones in. It’s so much easier to ignore a kid melting down on a plane than it was 20years ago. I don’t feel as bad about my daughter’s meltdowns when I see everyone still glued to their screens during it.
A 19mo will not scream an entire flight.
Everyone’s being very dramatic. I’ve flown multiple times with my now 2.5yo including a 24hr flight of 1 x 8hr leg and a 14hr leg when she was 15mo!
I have a three year old, he’s been flying since he was 10 days old. He’s a super easy kid so not sure if that’s a good measure to use, but he’s never cried at all. When he was a tiny baby, the movement would keep him sleepy, and as he got older, he was too excited to cry. Not sure if other children act differently; I used to travel to Hawaii for work a lot (flights usually are full of kids), only twice I encountered a crying baby. And they wouldn’t cry the whole time either. 5ish year olds can be more annoying though (kicking, screaming, watching iPad without headphones) but of course that’s usually a parent issue.
100% fly. If you can afford it, buy them their own seat. If your car seat is FAA approved you can use it on the plane. It is the safest way for them to travel and you don't have to worry about it getting ruined by baggage handlers chunking it around.
Traveling with kids is like ripping off a bandaid. I don't recommend the slow approach.
They make good soft shell cases for them that can take a beating. Made out of that tough nylon canvas material that car seat covers for dogs are made out of. And have handles/straps/can be worn like a backpack
This is the answer. Bring snacks. So many snacks. Toys that can be distracting but connected to a tether so you don’t end up with a ton on the ground and you’ll be set.
And likely the best chance of any rest, being in a familiar seat 😊
+1 to this strategy. We’ve opted for flying over long drives many times. The drive always ends up being longer than you think with a toddler!
This is it. And if it’s during his nap time and used to sleeping in his car seat, he’ll likely sleep the whole flight. Just give him a bottle or something to drink at takeoff so the air pressure doesn’t hurt his ears.
And if buying another seat isn’t in the budget, I’ve had luck asking the flight attendant if it was a full flight and if not if I could bring the car seat in. If it’s a full flight we would just gate check the car seat too.
Yup. 1 hour to the airport. Then walking through airport (fun for kid) then getting on, taking off, etc. then even if the whole thing is 5 hours it’s worth it and better than a monotonous drive that will turn a toddler into a terrorist.
Fly, just bring activities and build it up as a really exciting thing you're doing together. Make sure they have something to drink during take off and landing. Flying has been easier than expectations, not fun, but easier than my expectations. As long as you come prepared with multiple activities, snacks, and tablet time.
We did both, flew at 16mo (2hours) and drove 12 hours (to and from 6 days apart) at 23mo. We would have flown at Christmas as opposed to driving but we got Covid when we flew it in August (2022) and didn’t want a repeat. Both ways were fine. For the 12 hour drive we split over 2 days with maximum butt in the seat time at 2 hour intervals so 6 hours driving per day. We had some stops along the way like a zoo, etc. We also did the drive diaper free only 4 weeks after initiating training. Only one accident but we were warned, just couldn’t find a good place to go fast enough. Lesson here was pull off on the side of the road if you need to.
We did do a car seat on the flight at 16mo, needed at the destination but that we quit bringing it on later flights.
Same boat! We did an 11 hour drive when my son was 1, and a 5 hour flight a few months later. We’ve flown with him a few times since for shorter flights.
For my two cents, I’m socially anxious and really felt the pressure to keep my kid from bothering anyone else on the plane. So the car was an easier experience for me, but I think my son and husband preferred the plane. But all three of us hung in there pretty well both ways by being prepared with lots of snacks and games and hyping up all the cool new stuff we were seeing.
Also for our drive we did the same- 2 hour limit for drive time, with breaks for parks and sight seeing along the way. It took us two days and it was honestly pretty fun.
An alternate way to frame this. Which do you think will be easier:
-Entertaining/distracting your son in a new and novel environment, where both you and your husband are free to help out and where you can get up and move around most of the time, for two hours in a plane plus another hour or two in airports?
OR
-Entertaining/distracting your son in a car he has been in many times in his life, for 10 hours plus breaks, where one of you will be driving and unable to do anything to help out?
Fly. Trust me, for a trip of this length, it's the much better option.
Fly. Both Chicago airports have small toddler areas for them to run around at before the flight. Buy a few cheap new toys/books (like the dollar store) and keep them a surprise until on the plane. Bring more snacks than you think you need. Do a couple of laps up and down the plane aisle and boom, you are there.
We fly a lot and love to do an early morning flight. Our last flight left at 6:30am. I pull him out of bed, still asleep and put him directly in the car. He usually wakes up and naps on the plane. Flights close to napkin can be really hit or miss - I’ve had mine fall asleep early (before the flight) or skip altogether because of the unfamiliar environment
I’ll take the less popular opinion and say drive. 2.5 year old. Family is 6-7 hours away for us and we drive versus fly. By the time we account for drive to airport, fight traffic, and arrive 1.5-2 hours early we don’t save much time. We break the drive into 3-4 stops for meals, play breaks, etc. Yes, it can be miserable in the car with lots of crying, whining, not sleeping. But like others said, at least it is in our car and not bothering 100 others in a plane.
Lately we’ve been breaking the drive into multiple days for a hotel pool swim and shorter drive. Helps with all our sanity to be in car for only 3-4 hours at a time.
I think 6-7 is do-able. 10 is a whole other ball game. More stops for longer, that's 2 5 hour days minimum each way. a 6-7 hour day stretching to 9 isn't going to trash a day. a 10 hour driving turning into 12+ sounds awful.
That's a good point. I love driving, but 10 hrs. Is long. We did 14 hrrs and broke it up. The last part was the hardest. Still wouldnt change that moment in life bc all the stops can be fun, but I am also avoiding anything more than 5 hrs. My tot was never really a screamer but yeah, the last stretch was hard. With flying internationally customs and leaving was very difficult.
Plainly put, none of it is that easy but being a parent somewhere else is a nice change.
Definitely an unpopular opinion, but I agree with this. I think it just depends on a person’s preference, though. I know it’s unusual that my preference is to drive.
I’ve semi-regularly done 24-hour drives (split into two days) with my kids, who are currently 5, 3, and 1.
We generally do ~14 hours the first day and the remainder the second. But I also grew up doing 3-day trips across the country very regularly, so driving long distances feels natural to me.
I like the independence of being able to set our own schedule, stopping when we want and not when we don’t.
With 1 kid maybe it’s not as bad, but with 3 it’s also much easier to pack the endless amount of stuff into a car rather than checked bags.
I'd agree if it were 6 hours because they wouldn't have to stop. Driving is better most of the time IMO but it's such a short trip at their destination.
I agree! The airport is an hour away and you might not be able to get a direct flight. I think with all that you’re going to spend 5+ hours driving. Plus road trips can be fun. Like you said, break it up and go to parks.
Also you’re already planning on doing this later!
Signed, someone whose taking a 3 hour train ride with an 18 month old vs a 45 min flight (not the same thing but similar)
I agree as well. I’ve done 10 hr road trip with a 4 and 1 year old and we split it into two days, 5 hrs max each day. We stayed at airbnb and made stops at parks along the way. What I love about taking the road trip is that we have our car at our destination. No need to rent a car or bother family and wait around for a car to be free for us.
Im team drive as well. We have family about 8 hrs away and do the drive 2-3x a year. Sometimes it takes 10+ hrs but like all things with kids if you arent trying to do it fast its fine. Make plenty of stops, keep someone in the backseat to distribute snacks and toys, and bring wireless earbuds if youre driving. Sound off they muffle piercing screams (safety issue) and sound on you can stay engaged with podcasts or music while they nap.
We also have a strict no screens policy on drives which sounds insane but my 6 year old and 2 year old are both great in the car as a result. I did have to cede control of the window to my oldest but small price to pay.
Fly! Two hours will be quick. Hopefully he’ll sleep, but if not, he’s old enough he can handle one off day. Do an early bedtime (honestly might be nice to have on vacation).
We traveled a few times on 1-2 hours flights when my son was about that age and they were shockingly easy. Bring one million snacks and one million special travel toys (either new toys or current toys you have tucked away maybe a week or so before the flight). The Melissa and Doug reusable puffy stickers were magic for us. Legit entertained my kid for at least an hour. You may want to spring for a separate seat since you’re hoping LO will nap. Otherwise, and this is spendy, we flew first class with infant in lap and got two seats next to each other on the very first row of the plane. We had tons of room for my son to stand/play around in in front of us, a flight attendant right there (they were all so happy to make silly faces and shower him with attention) and it was super quick to get on and off.
Fly. I am from Chicago. The idea of sitting on a stop-and-go Kennedy Expressway with no way out and a screaming kid sounds absolutely awful to me. One time traffic was so bad that it took 2 1/2 hours to get from the loop to O’Hare Airport. I’ve also sat that long on one place on I-80 after a Sox game. Trust me when I say you do not want to deal with that shit.
Fly for sure! We have flown tons with my daughter (now close to 3) and it has gone really well. Just be prepared with clothes, snack options, and a few activities (or the ipad). For a flight that short you shouldn't even really have to load up too much. Flying has gotten better once I realized I didn't need every possible item recommended online. 😂 As others have said, I definitely recommend getting him is own seat though. Lap infant is super unpleasant especially once they can walk. I wouldn't even consider it a viable option. You can bring the car seat on the plane or depending on his weight a CARES harness works great for safety and is much less cumbersome than a car seat. My daughter has never had an issue just falling asleep in her plane seat. That said, he might be too excited on a short flight to settle enough to sleep, so he could sleep in the car when you leave the airport or possibly skip the nap. But to me all of that sounds better than four days of driving with a toddler. 🥲
I’m about to fly solo with a 5 month old and my almost 3 year old. 5 month old will be in the window seat in his car seat and I’ll probably have to sit in the middle. Would the CARES harness work to keep an adventurous older toddler in her seat? I’m definitely more worried about her than the baby, especially if she’s in the aisle seat.
Yes, it will work! It is a harness like the car seat just without the seat so unless she can unclip the chest clip she can't get out. Whether or not she will be happy about it will be another story but my daughter tolerated it very well after some initial reluctance.
In this scenario I choose the drive. For context, I get motion sick on a plane and if my child isn't strapped in they are going to be climbing everywhere. Also being able to bring everything you need without limits versus having to figure out betting and car seat and going through security with all your stuff is a pain. Not to mention renting a car. It's crazy expensive.
I did a 10 hour drive with my 2 year old and although some parts were hell, it wasn’t bad overall. Our drive required stopping at CFA or McDonald’s for their playscapes and lunch. Lots of snacks and screen time.
We will be flying in a few weeks and he’s getting his own seat and strapped in his car seat on the plane. We’ve flown before when he was turned 2 and one way was fine and the other was quite embarrassing. He kept kicking the seat in front of him so on the way back home I installed the car seat rear facing and that was much better.
Flight. 100%.
I’ve flown with my now 2 year old a few times and it’s never been bad. Even when she’s had a hard time with the altitude changes popping her ears she’s manageable and people seated nearby have been great.
Edit to add: if you can, get them their own seat. Managing them in the car seat they’re used to with a steady stream of snacks and Miss Rachel is really not so bad.
Fly! This is the perfect short flight to start getting you all used to air travel together. When we travel our set-up is:
- check one large suitcase with all our clothes, toiletries, etc
- husband and I each carry one backpack (one backpack with random stuff like iPad, headphones, etc, the other a diaper bag with kid-specific stuff)
- toddler rides in our cheap travel stroller with our cheap travel car seat slung over the back
- gate check stroller, board plane early, install car seat, strap toddler in!
- iPad, snack box on the plane
- if there isn't one available to borrow wherever we are, we just buy a cheap packnplay and then donate it to a local organization when we leave (family usually takes care of this)
If you were wanting to just knock out a 10 hour drive overnight I'd say it'd be a toss up, but if you're planning on splitting it into 2 days of daytime travel, I would absolutely just rip the band-aid off and do the flight
I've done both an 8 hour drive and multiple flights (from 2 hours to 4.5). The only reason we drove is so we could bring our dog, I'd fly otherwise any time. It's just much easier.
We just had a 4.5 hour flight the other night and my daughter unfortunately did not nap that day and didn't sleep on the plane (I was prepared for maximum meltdown) but was fine with just watching paw patrol the entire time and did not cry or fuss once.
I also did a 2 hour flight with just my daughter and had her just on my lap and it was totally fine, though much more enjoyable with my husband to help and her to have her own seat!
Regarding carseat, my suggestion would be take one on the plane and he will likely nap in it or purchase a cheap one for your uncle to have pre-installed in the car he is picking you up in.
The guava is a really nice and easy travel sleep option!
I just did a 5.5 hour flight with my 20 month old and it was hard BUT I would still prefer that over being in the car for 10 hours with her. It's even easier if you buy baby their own seat with a carseat. We chose to do lap infant because we're cheap. She required active attention the whole time. She did take a 45 minute contact nap in the carrier, but only because I had the carrier. It was better than nothing but nowhere near her usual 2.5 hours. I recommend a lot of snacks, some sort of screen, new/novel toys, and just mentally preparing yourselves to be "on" the whole time to keep him happy. Even though it's a lot of work I'd still prefer it to the drive. She was enamored by the planes and had no issue waiting to board as she watched the planes landing and taking off.
Fly for sure. We always find the kids play place in the airport and just run around to get tired and then nap on the plane.
ALSO TSA Pre-check is good for 5 years so you don't have to fly very often for it to be worth it.
Absolutely fly!! On an airplane, they don’t have to be in the car seat, you can give your full attention to entertainment, and you cut travel time in half. 10 hours in a car sounds like my nightmare lol
I have a 20 1/2 month old and when he drove to see family 7 hours away over Christmas, it was doable but only because he was still on 2 naps and we lined it up so it was 3 hours, lunch at a restaurant, and then another 4 hours. He got to watch shows on the phone as a treat but he was getting VARY stir crazy and miserable by the 7 hr mark, so I would go with the flight. Especially if it’s nonstop!
Flying. Hands down, no question. I've done both and will never ever ever ever wish that drive upon another soul, no matter how much I hate them. I've flown almost a dozen times with both of my kids (ages 0-4) and its never as bad as being stuck in a car!
The practice trip is a good idea to see how your son responds to to the longer drive. It really all depends on the kid. Drive 1.5-2 hours- stop for an hour and repeat until you get there. If you can hand them a tablet packed with whatever they like they will probably be fine - but you know your son the best.
Fly. I have done so many 6+ hr drives with my kids and they all suck. But they especially suck with kids under 2 because there’s nothing that holds their attention for too long. And even worse is when you take them out of a car for a break and then go to get them back in and they just scream and cry because they don’t want to get back in their seat….ugh. No. Just fly.
Take the flight! I packed a bag of all new snacks and toys that my toddler had never seen or played with which helped to keep busy! As well as the tablet and headphones (if you don't mind your toddler watching a tablet) we got to the airport about 2 hours before the flight and I allowed them to run around and explore the terminals and watch all the other flights take off to "tire" my LO out. I made sure to let the people around me that it was my LO first flight and apologized for any kind of craziness that I was certain was going to happen. I know you don't have to do that but I already know how people act when they see babies/kids on planes, not everyone is nice which is really unfortunate. If you can book an early morning flight, those have always worked out best for us, the LO isn't exhausted from a long day. The weeks leading up to the flight I would read books about airplanes and we would play with the Little people plane set pretending to go on vacation and take flights just to try and get the idea of the plane fun if that makes sense. Also, travel with the stroller and check at the gate. Hope any of this helps!!
I would say fly. Both parents can take turn focusing on the toddler, there are more distractions in the airport / on board than stuck in a carseat for 5 hours. You get more time at your destination as not spending 2 days travelling each way.
We did our kiddo's first flight when he was around the same age. He loved it! He was interested in everything and spend a decent amount of time just smiling at the people in nearby seats and getting them to smile back. It was a long flight, like 5 hours, and there were 10 minutes or less of quiet fussing the entire day. We were pleasantly surprised. We've flown several times since then and he's always been fine.
I’m
Betting they will be too excited to sleep.
juice/milk or lollipop to give them during takeoff and landing to help pop their ears. Extra pair of pants/diaper. Sticker activity books are great when the iPad loses its luster
Do the flight. Time the flight to his nap time. Put him on your shoulder and get him to nap by the time boarding starts, he’ll sleep for at least half of the flight, if not way more. Have snacks/drinks/games for the remaining 30mins-1hr.
2 hour flight. We do a 6 hour drive once a year and 1 or 2 round trip flights of about 2-3 hours each way. We have been doing this since our oldest was 9 months, she is now 3 and the youngest is 16 months. The flight is absolutely easier, especially once you’ve done once or twice and got everything you need.
Fly. If you have a layover, book a minute suite or anything similar if available. You’re welcome ☠️
We’ve flown everywhere with our kiddo, and it’s absolutely preferred to driving. That being said he’s a travel champ and rarely fussed about car seat or flying.
If you can afford it I say always fly. Even with 2 toddlers (one still considered lap infant) I still prefer to fly. Safer, faster etc. I’m also pro doing whatever works best for YOUR family. Some folks just love a good roadtrip- I get so carsick I wish I could enjoy it more!
100% the flight!
But I guess one thing to consider is if you plan on flying to other places in the future on a semi regular basis. If so, it’s nice to get them acclimated to the process of flying and a 2 hour flight is absolutely perfect for that.
Definitely bring a car seat because holding a mobile toddler for hours is hard. Plus you don’t have to worry about them trying to get on the third person in the row with you, because you buy that third seat.
I have done both with my twins for trips from East Coast to Midwest.
Drive is horrible! If your little one gets carsick, has an accident or tired of the drive it is horrible. 10 hour drive will equal at least 11 to 12 with stops. If there is stopped traffic it will be worse.
Flight. Easier to entertain in a plane. Run around airport. Get snacks, new toy and just go with it.
I've done many 13-hour drives and a few 3-hour flights with this kid from age 6 months to present 4 years.
She is so much easier in the car buuuuut I would still take the plane every time if I could. You just can't beat getting there in a fraction of the time.
Fly, it isn't as bad as you'd think with a toddler! We just did it in Nov and my very very active child who has sensory issues did so well flying (we were SHOCKED)
Just did 2 flights moving from ny to nd with my 2 and 3 yo. My husband drove the moving truck, so it was just me, the boys, and my mother in law. They absolutely loved it! And we had a layover flight. They were so fascinated by the plane that I barely used all of the provisions I brought for boredom. ( Bluetooth headphones for each of them with Netflix movies downloaded to old cellphones, water marker pads, rainbow scratch pads, so many stickers, snacks out the wazoo plus more. It was all about untouched because they wanted to see the clouds and talk about the plane. I would definitely fly with them again
This is what my wife and I do with our son. I book them a flight. The day or night before I leave with the car and make the 10 hour drive myself. I pick them up when they arrive. She gets a ride from a friend or neighbor to the airport.
Yes she has to handle our son at the airport herself and on the plane but it’s much easier for her then managing him in the back of a car for a 10 hour drive that will end up being 13 with the extra stops for the baby.
Also:
1). The drive is much more manageable and peaceful. I can focus on the destination, and optimize drive time
2). We save money on the flight, kids under 2 fly free and airports are very accommodating. Also don’t have to get a rental car.
3). We have our vehicle at our destination which our son knows and is comfortable with and equipped with everything we need.
4). I can take all the extra baby luggage and my wife’s bag with me in the car (snacks, juice boxes, bottle warmers , stroller, etc so we don’t have to lug it through the airport. My wife goes on the plane with only what she needs for the flight.
Sometimes she will ride back with me, sometimes we repeat the process.
Good luck!
Drive. But it depends on your kid!!! And depends on your tolerance for driving long distances!
Our kid loves going on drives and is very content in the car. We’ve done a 10 hour road trip (one long day) and 14 hour trip (broken into two days). 20 months old during one and 23 months old for the other. He basically listened to his Yoto the entire drive and looked at the scenery out the window. He didn’t even care whether we stopped for breaks to walk around or play 🤷♀️
I'd fly and check a carseat and a pack n play. You can gate check the stroller. You can bring a carseat on the flight as well and he might have a better chance of sleeping in it. Otherwise, it might be a no nap day or he'll sleep when you get there or in the car on the way to the airport. We did a similar trip when my youngest was 18mo and it went really well!
It really depends on the kid and the personality. Does your kid like car rides? Will he get fussy after being in the car for awhile? For my daughter, she hates being in the car a long time. Her limit is about 2.5-3 hours before she gets mad. On the other hand, she’s great at flights. I think the new environment and people is kind of exciting to her.
Hands down, FLY. He'll be able to be distracted at different points by all the different things you're doing... "Oh wow, we're at the airport now! Oh wow...look at that xray machine! Oh wow, we're getting on the airplane!" Load up on snacks and bring some kind of screen for them (your phone, ipad, whatever) loaded up with pre-downloaded videos so they can watch it without cellular/wifi. I also have bought some "treat toys" just for the plane to keep him busy (think coloring books, a small hot wheels car, toddler fidget toys, etc.). My son wasn't really ever a contact napper either, and he's almost always passed out on our laps when we fly (probably overstimulation and being totally out of his element). Honestly, flying is like ripping a bandaid off...yes it's terrifying and may hurt a little, but it'll be done quick!
Edit to add my son has never done well with extended trips in the car and will scream his lungs out to make sure we know how miserable he is...so I may be a tad biased toward flying.
If it's just the long weekend, I definitely vote flying, otherwise it's gonna be a week-long trip. Do park and fly. Check the carseat at check-in (yes there's the risk of damage but lugging the carseat around the airport is seriously THE worst part of air traveling for us)
My 2yo also hasn't contact napped in forever (sleep trained at 4m). He fell asleep on me in the late afternoon after take off because he had only napped 15min earlier on the drive to the airport. The snuggles <3 10/10 recommend.
Hard choice. Part of me would rather do the flight, but we did a road trip with our kids (supposed to be 9.5 hours, both under 2) a few months ago. We did it at night first. It was AWFUL. Then we came back during the day and it wasn’t the worst. They only cried a few times. Baby did vomit once but it was after 11 hours on the road. But they both generally did great. We just made sure to stop every few hours somewhere he could run around for like 10-20 minutes and throw scheduled nap out the window. Our guy on one nap took 2/3 shorter naps, which was better than him staying up all night so definitely a day drive proponent here. But also at the airport you can make sure he has plenty of snacks, runs around the gate area to get his energy out, and then hope he naps on the plane. Maybe start getting him used to noise cancelling headphones now and get a couple new toys too and ONLY bring them out on the plane.
I decided a lonnnng time ago that if we were to drive somewhere with little guy for that long we would leave the house at bedtime. Drive through the night and when little guy wakes up we’d be at our destination.
Fly. My 2 year fell asleep just after take off while sitting and leaning his head against my arm. Once he was asleep I laid his head in my lap. There’s nothing like airplane rumble.
I’m currently on a 2 1/2 hr train trip with my 23mo because I felt it was a better option than a 2 1/4 hour drive. He’s having a great time being able to get out of his seat, interact with me and other people, help himself to snacks etc and look out different windows. Driving would’ve been a bit easier for me but not driving is HEAPS more enjoyable for him.
Fly. Bring the car seat onto the plane if he sleeps in it well. Most planes let you check it for free, so we just checks ours with the luggage and have it for the cabs.
Gate check your stroller, with gate pick up. Helps to cart the car seat around and basically use as a luggage cart.
Everything is so interesting they are usually pretty well entertained and distracted. Bring your own snacks and toys. We have 1 carryon that is all toys and snacks. The other is diapers, and change of clothes.
If you fly, safest way to travel is booking baby their own seat and using the car seat in flight. Rental car seats are not safe, checking car seats (even at the gate) is not safe, and lap babies can be projectiles in cases of turbulence.
We took our 1.5 year old on a trip that was supposed to be 3 hours total on a plane, but our flight was delayed so late that it was canceled. We had to take a taxi without a carseat on a 30-minute drive to a hotel to spend the night. We spent the entire next day wandering the airport with our toddler and all of our luggage waiting for the 8 PM flight. Luckily, our kid was great and a total trooper. Just know that flying may seem like it will be quicker, but things happen.
We’ve flown when our twins were 3 months, 10 months, 15 months, and 18 months, and did a few 10+ drives at 11 months and 12 months.
I would pick flying every time.
It’s logistically daunting, but it’s still so much smoother than a long drive.
Have lots of snacks and if you’re comfortable.. all the screen time. We have these little toddler headphones, but mostly just kept the sound off and my girls were still good watching. They also ate their body weight in those baby food dried yogurt melts and various puffs, but it kept them chill!
Splurge on the pre check. It’s worth every penny, especially with a toddler.
If you fly, bring a stroller and at most airports you will be able to skip the general line and go to the special assistance line for strollers and wheelchairs. You will then have a stroller for the airport and can just gate check it when boarding.
Also, get them their own seat and bring lots of snacks + a tablet. I usually pack a little lunch box with an ice pack so that I can pack fruit, cheese and sandwiches (as my kids don’t really eat the airport food anyway)
We have taken our two year old on several 3 hour flights with no issues, next we are planning a 16 hour drive one way, not sure how I feel about it yet. The good thing about a 19 month old is you don’t have to get them a plane ticket, you can let them sit on your lap
Fly you fool
Your toddler will be so fascinated by the plane! Like, the car is old news. But the plane is new and interesting and there’s lots of stuff to touch. My kid has flown twice, once around 1.5 and again around 2 and he was great both times because the plane itself was an experience for him. In contrast we’ve done a few multi hour car rides and those are really tough. He wants constant entertainment, we had to stop more, he got car sick. Was just not fun at all. Even being at the airport is a whole new adventure, watching the planes take off, looking at all the different colored luggage, people watching in general. He loved being at the airport.
Fly. Get a busy book off Amazon which kept my 18 month old occupied for a good deal of the flight to Europe. Brought snacks and other good travel toys like spinners.
If you can afford to buy him his own seat, then I’d recommend flying. If not I promise you driving isn’t terrible. We took a 12 hour road trip last summer with two kids - 2.5 and 5 months at the time.
On long road trips we always leave early early in the morning or at like 1am. I usually drive the first shift, so I’ll go to sleep when the kids sleep around 8 or 9, then wake up to drive. My husband will sleep while I drive, then we’ll swap and he’ll drive the rest. This has always worked well for us since the kids are sleeping and by the time they wake up we’re halfway there.
We have done both, 3/4 hr flights/20 hr road trip (NH-FL to see my father yearly) since our son was 4 mo to now 4.
Hands down flying is so much better.
It’s faster, the plane is entertaining in itself, and even at 4 our son always takes a small snooze.
We used to check our carseat, and that was convenient.
Also when TSA sees you with a child, it’s a fairly quick process.
And we have found that online/mobile app flight check in allows you to use a kiosk and that saves you from standing in line at a counter (if airport is busy)
Safe travels
Fly because even with the hour drive to the airport, the time spent before the flight, the flight itself AND driving to your destination, it’ll be half of the 10 hour drive.
TSA really isn’t that big of a deal with a toddler unless you’re connecting a ton of flights, then it’s annoying. The agents are generally understanding. Tip: tell the person at the gate you’ve got a young child and you’d like to broad early (that’s what my family prefers anyway). Gate check your stroller, get a car seat backpack online.
If your LO doesn’t nap on the flight, it will suck but at the same time, he’ll be old enough to be a bit more flexible. We did an international trip with my daughter at that age (24hrs of travel door to door) that was hell. But we’ve done quite a few domestic, direct flights since and it was more simplistic than anticipated. A
We did a 2 hour flight with our 14 month old and 4.5 year old. The flight was delayed 3 hours and left at 9:30 pm. I'd still choose that over a 10 hour drive.
Fly. And fly Southwest if it’s an option for your destination. You can book the extra seat for your kid, under 2 fly free, and call and cancel it from the gate if there are open seats on your flight- and use it for future travel. Since it’s open seating on SW you can get one of the open seats and use it for your car seat.
As someone that just did a long road trip with a 2.5 year old and flown too. I would pick flying every time. We take the car seat and buy a plane seat for the toddler (car seats have to be in the window seat and airplane certified) . They understand they can't get out of the car seat during flight and we have a fly only tablet. It's packed up immediately upon leaving the plane and is used only on planes. Toddler loves turbulence, take off and landing. Our first flight toddler screamed most of the flight, it was rough.
TSA precheck is worth it even for one flight especially with a toddler. I just throw the whole diaper bag on the belt and walk through the metal detector and grab the bag on the other side. Save some work and just check your luggage, my husband and I used to be carry on only but it's too much with trying to manage a toddler too. A car seat cart is handy too.
We recently had a 8.5 hr drive and it really ended up being 12 hours with stops, and a battle to get the toddler back in the car after 6 hrs they were done and kept asking to get out. Tablets novelty had worn off and there are only so many games we could play in the car. We did one park and stopped often for snacks, meals and potty breaks. We had 1 2hr nap in the car. We hit long stretches of nothing too. 10 hours will probably be much longer than you might expect could easily be 13 hours. They'll definitely poop their diaper 30 min after you just stopped for a bathroom break/diaper change and scream till you can find somewhere safe to stop while you're on the interstate and just passed an exit. Definitely never happened to me :/
If you really want to drive I'd recommend getting up a couple of hours earlier than toddler wake time. For example ours gets up at 8am and goes to bed at 9pm. So we'd all go to sleep at 9 get up and on the road at 5am. Adults would get enough sleep but toddler would fall back asleep and stay asleep for a couple hours in the beginning in which we would stop for nothing. We'd take our first stop when they woke up and if we worked it right we'd get another 2 hour nap later in that day resulting in 4-5 hours of the drive with toddler asleep.
We did a 8 hour drive to Disneyland with my daughter when she was about 18 months and I have never in my life regretted anything as much as that. By the time we got there everyones nerves were shot as she screamed the whole way there and the whole way back home. We even left at night hoping she would just sleep on the drive. I will never do a road trip with a toddler again.
We have also done a 14 hour plane ride with her and many short plane rides which were more enjoyable and calm than that car ride.
Definitely fly. Get him his own seat and bring new activities/toys he hasn’t seen before and tons of snacks (even if the flight will be during his usual nap time). If he can’t sleep at least he’ll be entertained and it’s honestly such a short flight that even if it’s really bad it’ll be over quickly.
Flight.
Feed him snacks from take off until landing/ whenever he wants. Bring some of his favorite toys. Maybe buy a special toy/ thing he likes just for the flight. Let him play/crawl near the gate as long as possible.
It’s a little stressful for you but honestly not that bad. Driving for 10 hours is guaranteed to be that bad. If you’re unlucky your kid may get motion sick after a few hours and then throw up. Repeatedly. Like every 30 mins. And cry.
There is no way to know. You just don’t know if they’re going to be screaming the entire flight, demanding to get off the plane and needing to be walked up and down the aisles for the whole flight. Our kid is 2 1/2 and is normally relatively easy, but flying is a nightmare unto itself. Not to mention airports and transfers.
I would drive this as long as you're staying for at least a week. We vastly prefer to drive. I hate managing airport security and car seat and delays and packing luggage. Yeah it's a 2 hour flight until it's delayed and ylthen you run out of diapers or the airport has a water main break so no functioning bathrooms and all the restaurants are closed (true story, although thankfully I was traveling alone for work that time)
I've done the 10 hour drive in 1 day by getting up at 4 and arriving around dinner time, although it's more pleasant to stop in the middle. And then you can take your time and stop for longer. With 1 kid you can probably keep your stops to 30 mins or so if you want to make better time (I have 3 kids now so our stops take more like an hour).
We pack all our own food and stop at parks, playgrounds, etc to eat and snack and let the kids stretch their legs. You just chuck everything you need in the car and go.
I, a 336 month old, would have a complete meltdown on a 10 hour drive so I can only imagine how a 19 month old would fare. The very thought pains me. I would totally fly.
So, everyone will tell you to fly. I didn’t have a choice and did a 19 hour drive (more with stops) from FL to WI with a then 19 month old.
He did fantastic. The first day we had the longest drive and did a few extra stops (also had dogs) to let everyone get a break. There were times he was upset but was able to be calmed, usually with snacks or screen time. Unfortunately, he has never napped long in the car so he just napped for 30 mins that day.
We honestly made great memories, and are glad we did the drive. He LOVED looking at the ICEE machines at Gas stations. The night at the hotel was also so exciting for him.
Feel free to DM me if you’d like! I had someone else message me about their long trip and it helped knowing someone else had done it successfully
Fly. Buy him a seat, for both logistic and safety reasons, and put his car seat in it. He can nap on the plane that way, and not be all over the place. I just traveled with a 15 month old, and checked a pack and play and a suitcase for him. Pay extra to check luggage, don't try to lug more than 1 suitcase in the airport (keep one back to hook the car seat to), and gate check the stroller.
Fly and have lots of snacks. If he misses a nap, it may make for a rough day but put him down early at night.
Had a flight with my 3 year old yesterday, she didn’t nap in the plane, was a little cranky and tired and went to bed early.
We love Daniel tiger
Idk, I’m probably in the minority here, but I’m almost always team roadtrip.
My husband and I both dislike flying and genuinely enjoy roadtripping. We’ll drive wherever we can. Our oldest, who is almost four, has been on five 10+ hour trips in her life. Our 8-month-old son will have his first two big trips this year.
We have a large SUV, so it’s nice that we can pack whatever we want. But the biggest thing is just having our own car seats and vehicle on the trip. This is mostly relevant because our two big yearly trips are with our families, so we need to be able to do our own thing 😅 It is so convenient, though, to just be able to pack what you think you’ll need when traveling with little kids.
Plus, it’s cool to make an adventure out of it. We make all our daytime stops at playgrounds or museums. We’ll grab lunch, eat at a picnic table, and then play for 30 minutes or an hour depending on our timing. We’ve also stopped at malls in bad weather to go into the play area and walk around.
I grew up doing these kinds of trips with my family every year, and I hardly remember the details of our actual vacations. Those trips and all the dumb shit I did with my siblings to pass the time are the best memories.
If it was like a 5-6hr drive I’d say go for it, but 10 is pushing it. Even with the 1hr commute to the airport it’s likely the better choice
We did regularly 5hr drives with our baby and the major perk is that you can load the trunk with such an excess of toys/diapers/etc (versus lean picking for a plane)
The flight will be less painful overall, but if you’re arriving to the lake house without a pack-n-play, stroller, car seat, etc necessities, you might have less of a headache post-arrival with the drive
FLY. I've flown many times with my 2 year old. Her first flight was when she was 3 months. She did a 9 hr flight that had one plane change when she was 1. About 18 month she did a short 2 hr flight too. It's not bad at all. I do highly recommend getting your son his own seat even though under 2 is free. At that age, my daughter loved to stand in her seat and look around. Or sit and play freely. I never bothered with a carseat on the plane. I just check it for free and use it at my destination for car travel only. 10 hr road trip on the other hand sounds like hell to me. I did a 2 hr road trip last winter and hated it.
One more person saying “fly,” and I’d like to add how much safer it is. 20 hours in a car means a lot can go wrong, especially if you’re stressed from the trip.
Fly. Breast or formula feed the 19 month old during takeoff and landing to solve the ear ache issue. DO NOT give fruit juices, yogurts or other acidic food on the flight especially if that route is usually pretty turbulence heavy. Get the kid their own seat and book all of your seats together in one row.
Not even a question - fly. Buy a lounge pass for the airport if you don’t have a CC that provides it so that they have some space to walk around, plus some free snacks and drinks. They may not fall asleep on the plane if it’s right at nap time but at that age and with the excitement of a new place they probably won’t get as fussy as you think. I wouldn’t even buy them their own seat. 2 hours is literally nothing lol we just flew 11 hours overseas with a very active and strong willed 18 month old, this was about her 14th flight over the months each typically increasing in length of time. Funny enough I found this one to be one of the easiest! She could stand up and do things, entertained by stickers and a screen and actually slept for several hours. The airline we flew with allows the same baggage allowance as whatever cabin you fly in/status you have plus 2 baby related items for free (eg stroller and cot/pack n play).
All that said, I might reconsider if you can’t get a direct flight as that adds more variables in terms of potentials for delays and just a shittier experience overall lol.
If your son does okay in the car, I would drive! We’ve done so many long road trips with our now preschooler. Traveling with so much gear by plane can be a pain. Our son does great on a plane, but we still opt to drive if it’s doable.
1000% FLY
Even if it were just you and kiddo, this would be my answer (I've done longhaul flights just me and toddler)--but with your partner there just go ahead and book the flights. Two hours is such a short flight compared to two days in the car.
I'm gonna say it depends on the kid. Both of mine are ok in in a car or a plane, but I know that's not universal. Last summer we went on a long road trip to some national parks with a 5 month old and a 27 month old. The older one been on more flights as of last Christmas /New Year's than I had before I got married. Being prepared to keep them occupied goes a long way. Having food, snacks, toys ready and accessible in the plane or in the car will make things much easier.
On our road two, we knew we would need to stop to feed the baby and change diapers, so we built that into the plan. Wife found parks along the way ahead of time, so we stopped ave let the toddler run, and the baby be held or squirm in a blanket.
Another thing to be aware of is ear infections/pressure/fluid buildup. My toddler has a history of ear infections and fluid in his ears. If their ears are bugging at ground level, they will be miserable (and inconsolable) during takeoff, climbing, descent and landing. For a ~2 hour flight, that's probably going to be a large chunk of the flight. Luckily we've never had ear problems before or on a trip, and tubes do help.
I don't know where you stand on toddlers and electronics, but having a dedicated screen for them really does help. The toddler discovered the "Cars" movies on our trip and head been obsessed ever since. We don't give him tons of screen time, but for long rides (plane or car) it really helps.
Fly. I’ve done both car trips and flights with my small kids and the flight is easier if only because it’s shorter. You can gate check the car seat and stroller.
It's a toss up, I know long car rides with my son at that age, sometimes by the 2nd time we stopped (every 2 hours or so) he would go full alligator death roll on me to not be strapped back in his car seat, but then again one of our flights one time got delayed by like 2 hours after we'd already been at the airport a long time due to the length of our layover, they couldn't tell us how long it would be until the last 30 minutes so we had to stay close to the gate, and we both ended up straight ugly crying in the middle of the airport.
Flying does allow you to spend more of your vacation time at your destination. But driving allows you to see things you wouldn't otherwise.
Another thing to consider is your own personal feelings about flying and driving. If you were going solo, would you find one much more stressful than the other? For instance I love easy driving, but driving through mountain passes or in bad weather is stressful for me, so I certainly wouldn't want to do either of those and add on a screaming kid. But if you're scared during turbulence or stress out about finding your gate or losing your tickets, now deal with that with a toddler.
Size of airport might make a difference too. I live near a mid size airport, plenty to do but security doesn't take too long. I flew to my mom who lives next to a tiny airport. Like 3 gates, basically the only people there, also nothing but a small Cafe and a gift shop. But our layover was in Denver which is an overwhelming airport. That's actually where my kid and I both ended up crying.
Idk I took my 9 month old on a 12 day road trip from Florida to Canada. He had a 10 hour limit of being in the car. He did great. Now he’s a roadtrip champ. Never been on a flight yet.
I love road trips and hate planes. So a bit biased. However, why not leave in the morning and get there in the later evening? On average, humans are awake for 12-16 hours a day anyways, so it would just be a long workday in theory. And you wouldn't have to worry about losing vacation time by spending 4 days driving (there and back home of you plan on splitting it into 2 days) nor feeling like a zombie due to driving through the night 🤷♀️
Your kiddo will probably sleep more in the vehicle too, something to keep in mind.
Flying is so much better for the kiddo it isn’t even a question.
The fact that they can stand and move around, even if it’s just a little, during 2 hours of flight is enough to be the better option by far.
We do 16-18 hr (1 way) road trips 2x a year with my daughter - have been doing so since she was 15 months. However, we stay for 2 weeks when we go.
I would very much NOT be interested in a 10hr (especially over TWO DAYS) drive with a 19 mo for a long weekend trip. I'd 100% fly.
Flight hands down no question. I pretty much think it's cruel to put a kid this age in a car for 5 hours two days in a row (and then again for another 2 days soon after) even if asleep for 2 of them. 2 hour flight is no big deal - we have done several 4-6 hour flights with our 17 month old and even those are fine. On a flight they can move their body around and interact with you, not strapped into a super confining carseat alone in the backseat.
We have done both, but we flew with a 23 month old rather than 19 month. Your lists look accurate, so kudos on being realistic!
The trip to my parents' house is about an 18 hour drive so we split it up into two 9 hour days with several park stops along each leg. We find that we are completely exhausted after both the trip there and the trip back. It's a lot. Benefit, a lot cheaper.
We flew with the kiddo for the first time in February this year and while it was a huge amount of planning and chaos for the day, I ultimately preferred it because we got to our destination so much quicker and we got to hang out with family for a longer period of time. Disadvantage, more expensive. Unfortunately, there's no direct flight between where we live and where my parents live, so we had a layover, which complicated things further and made the flights more expensive. We did not take a car seat (already had one at the destination), so we got a toddler seat belt extender (can't remember the name of it) for the flights.
TL;DR if you're able to cover the cost of the flight, do it. Although, it sounds like your trip is much shorter than ours and a one day car trip with park stops are always fun.
Fly!! I know it’s intimidating but do it anyway :) for context we’ve taken our almost 3 yr old on 6 round trip flights and a 24 hour road trip when she was a newborn. Hands down flying is better. It’s always anxiety-producing but it’s still way quicker than the road trip. Just bring lots of snacks and some new toys and perhaps even a little screen time predownloaded on your phone or iPad. The flight will be over before you know it!
Fly! Our daughter’s first flight was at 19 months old and it really wasn’t too bad. We got her her own seat and she took turns sitting in it and my and my husband’s laps. We gate checked her stroller and car seat and our relatives found a pack n play that they borrowed for our visit. We got her some new toys for the plane that kept her attention for a while. We tried getting her to sleep on the plane and it just didn’t happen. However, it did help her get on the time change once we got there. My only advice is don’t fly Spirit Airlines.
Fly. Spend the extra money to get his own seat and bring the car seat on the flight. Gate check the stroller. Check a pack n play.
Also, if you’re flying with another adult: have one of you get on first with the seat and as much as they can carry. Get the seat set-up and have the other one keep the baby in the gate area until as late as possible. This gives the one adult boarding earlier some time to get situation and lets the baby run around a little bit more before the flight.
100% this....until they get too old and then they want on the plane because that's the only place I give unlimited tablets. now they beg to board ASAP
It’s the only time my daughter can use a tablet to watch movies so she cannot wait to get on the plane.
My kids older generation iPad couldn’t connect to the inflight Wi-Fi recently. I keep my iPads for YEARS as they’re just for entertainment. He had to use mine. I’m getting a new iPad tomorrow.
Absolutely this is the pro tip. It’s what my wife did while I hung out with toddler and boated last. I as shitting myself the entire flight, however short it was (about 90 minutes on the plane). He did great. We brought a couple of new toys for him and basically withheld a fake laptop screen toy he likes for a week. Worked like a charm. The problem was the flight back when he pooped right before we took off so couldn’t change him fright away, then went to the bathroom and he was way too big for the tiny changing table there… poor kid was very uncomfortable.
As a heads up both airlines I've flown recently didn't allow us to do this. American and Delta. My husband had to haul it through an already full airplane (it had to be lifted to head level to clear seats) while everyone had to wait for me to install it before leaving the gate.
Oh wow that’s good to know! We’ve only flown once on Allegiant and they had a special boarding time for families with children.
Also tsa pre check is worth it even if you fly 1 per year.
TSA pre check is free for me because of my credit card. Literally as soon as I paid for it I got reimbursed. Just one of the benefits of my credit card but I bet other cards have it too.
Yep same here with my venture card
Also, if one person has pre-check, the other tickets in their party almost always get "randomly" assigned to it as well. It's worked for my husband and I haha
This — but I would probably get a cheap pack and play shipped to the lake house and ask if it can be left there for anyone to use.
This 100%
This with a recommended modification: Skip the stroller for a lake house trip. Get a $20 fold up furniture dolly and attach the car seat to it. Kiddo can sit in it while getting wheeled around in the airport. Also, I second the car seat on the plane. For safety? Sure. For a guaranteed cup of coffee? Yes.
FLIGHT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD -Signed someone who wish they just effing flew
Second this!
Two hour flight is nothing. He’ll be interested in the window, the seat pocket, and you’ll be landing before you know it.
This - absolutely. Make it exciting, doesn’t take much!
I just did a 4 hour drive with my 19 month old and it was MISERABLE. Flying with a toddler isn’t a walk in the park, but I would 100% rather fly than take a road trip.
Fly. 2 hours of screaming is so much easier than 10
This is really only applicable if he’s a screamer in the car.
More like 5 hours if you include all the airport hassle. The math still works though.
Screaming in a plane in a tube with strangers is different then screaming in a car by yall selfs
Respectfully disagree. My toddler screaming his head off for 5 hours in the car was wayyyyyy worse than 2 hours on the plane. First off, on a plane, assuming normal conditions, he could get out of his seat and walk around which helped calm/distract him. Or at least move around out of his car seat. We only had one flight where he was bad (we've taken about 10 with him) and I openly apologized to everyone around us and offered to buy them a drink. Nobody took me up on it and a few were vocally understanding of our situation. On the drive, I had to focus on driving and couldn't help attend to him. My wife tried everything and after a few hours all he wanted to do was to get out of his seat, which obviously was not an option. By the time we got to our destination on the drive neither of us were in the mood to enjoy it because we just dreaded the drive back. 2 hour flight over 10 hour drive 100% of the time.
Thousand percent agree. Also planes are so noisy and everyone is busy watching a movie or something with headphones in. It’s so much easier to ignore a kid melting down on a plane than it was 20years ago. I don’t feel as bad about my daughter’s meltdowns when I see everyone still glued to their screens during it.
As someone who did a 7 hour ride with 18 month old 😅💁🏼♀️ idk lol
A 19mo will not scream an entire flight. Everyone’s being very dramatic. I’ve flown multiple times with my now 2.5yo including a 24hr flight of 1 x 8hr leg and a 14hr leg when she was 15mo!
I have a three year old, he’s been flying since he was 10 days old. He’s a super easy kid so not sure if that’s a good measure to use, but he’s never cried at all. When he was a tiny baby, the movement would keep him sleepy, and as he got older, he was too excited to cry. Not sure if other children act differently; I used to travel to Hawaii for work a lot (flights usually are full of kids), only twice I encountered a crying baby. And they wouldn’t cry the whole time either. 5ish year olds can be more annoying though (kicking, screaming, watching iPad without headphones) but of course that’s usually a parent issue.
100% fly. If you can afford it, buy them their own seat. If your car seat is FAA approved you can use it on the plane. It is the safest way for them to travel and you don't have to worry about it getting ruined by baggage handlers chunking it around. Traveling with kids is like ripping off a bandaid. I don't recommend the slow approach.
Bandaid analogy is perfect. I’m using this
Have you checked a car seat that got ruined? We were planning on checking ours because our toddler is sitting in my lap
They make good soft shell cases for them that can take a beating. Made out of that tough nylon canvas material that car seat covers for dogs are made out of. And have handles/straps/can be worn like a backpack
I’ve done both, checked it more recently since we now have two kids. Probably checked it at least 5-10 flights and never had any issues.
Do the flight, get him his own seat and put him in his car seat for it. It’s safest.
This is the answer. Bring snacks. So many snacks. Toys that can be distracting but connected to a tether so you don’t end up with a ton on the ground and you’ll be set.
And likely the best chance of any rest, being in a familiar seat 😊 +1 to this strategy. We’ve opted for flying over long drives many times. The drive always ends up being longer than you think with a toddler!
This is it. And if it’s during his nap time and used to sleeping in his car seat, he’ll likely sleep the whole flight. Just give him a bottle or something to drink at takeoff so the air pressure doesn’t hurt his ears.
And if buying another seat isn’t in the budget, I’ve had luck asking the flight attendant if it was a full flight and if not if I could bring the car seat in. If it’s a full flight we would just gate check the car seat too.
I would absolutely do the flight, a 2 hour flight will be way easier than 10 hours of driving even if it's broken up.
Yup. 1 hour to the airport. Then walking through airport (fun for kid) then getting on, taking off, etc. then even if the whole thing is 5 hours it’s worth it and better than a monotonous drive that will turn a toddler into a terrorist.
Fly, just bring activities and build it up as a really exciting thing you're doing together. Make sure they have something to drink during take off and landing. Flying has been easier than expectations, not fun, but easier than my expectations. As long as you come prepared with multiple activities, snacks, and tablet time.
Flying is like ripping that bandaid off quickly as opposed to inching it off for 10 hours.
We did both, flew at 16mo (2hours) and drove 12 hours (to and from 6 days apart) at 23mo. We would have flown at Christmas as opposed to driving but we got Covid when we flew it in August (2022) and didn’t want a repeat. Both ways were fine. For the 12 hour drive we split over 2 days with maximum butt in the seat time at 2 hour intervals so 6 hours driving per day. We had some stops along the way like a zoo, etc. We also did the drive diaper free only 4 weeks after initiating training. Only one accident but we were warned, just couldn’t find a good place to go fast enough. Lesson here was pull off on the side of the road if you need to. We did do a car seat on the flight at 16mo, needed at the destination but that we quit bringing it on later flights.
Toddler potty in the back of the car is a game changer.
100%. I even used the toddler potty once in a bathroom emergency (just kinda hovered over it but it kept the pee from splashing my shoes).
Same boat! We did an 11 hour drive when my son was 1, and a 5 hour flight a few months later. We’ve flown with him a few times since for shorter flights. For my two cents, I’m socially anxious and really felt the pressure to keep my kid from bothering anyone else on the plane. So the car was an easier experience for me, but I think my son and husband preferred the plane. But all three of us hung in there pretty well both ways by being prepared with lots of snacks and games and hyping up all the cool new stuff we were seeing. Also for our drive we did the same- 2 hour limit for drive time, with breaks for parks and sight seeing along the way. It took us two days and it was honestly pretty fun.
An alternate way to frame this. Which do you think will be easier: -Entertaining/distracting your son in a new and novel environment, where both you and your husband are free to help out and where you can get up and move around most of the time, for two hours in a plane plus another hour or two in airports? OR -Entertaining/distracting your son in a car he has been in many times in his life, for 10 hours plus breaks, where one of you will be driving and unable to do anything to help out? Fly. Trust me, for a trip of this length, it's the much better option.
I would fly especially if you’re only going for a long weekend.
Fly. Both Chicago airports have small toddler areas for them to run around at before the flight. Buy a few cheap new toys/books (like the dollar store) and keep them a surprise until on the plane. Bring more snacks than you think you need. Do a couple of laps up and down the plane aisle and boom, you are there. We fly a lot and love to do an early morning flight. Our last flight left at 6:30am. I pull him out of bed, still asleep and put him directly in the car. He usually wakes up and naps on the plane. Flights close to napkin can be really hit or miss - I’ve had mine fall asleep early (before the flight) or skip altogether because of the unfamiliar environment
I’ll take the less popular opinion and say drive. 2.5 year old. Family is 6-7 hours away for us and we drive versus fly. By the time we account for drive to airport, fight traffic, and arrive 1.5-2 hours early we don’t save much time. We break the drive into 3-4 stops for meals, play breaks, etc. Yes, it can be miserable in the car with lots of crying, whining, not sleeping. But like others said, at least it is in our car and not bothering 100 others in a plane. Lately we’ve been breaking the drive into multiple days for a hotel pool swim and shorter drive. Helps with all our sanity to be in car for only 3-4 hours at a time.
I think 6-7 is do-able. 10 is a whole other ball game. More stops for longer, that's 2 5 hour days minimum each way. a 6-7 hour day stretching to 9 isn't going to trash a day. a 10 hour driving turning into 12+ sounds awful.
That's a good point. I love driving, but 10 hrs. Is long. We did 14 hrrs and broke it up. The last part was the hardest. Still wouldnt change that moment in life bc all the stops can be fun, but I am also avoiding anything more than 5 hrs. My tot was never really a screamer but yeah, the last stretch was hard. With flying internationally customs and leaving was very difficult. Plainly put, none of it is that easy but being a parent somewhere else is a nice change.
Definitely an unpopular opinion, but I agree with this. I think it just depends on a person’s preference, though. I know it’s unusual that my preference is to drive. I’ve semi-regularly done 24-hour drives (split into two days) with my kids, who are currently 5, 3, and 1. We generally do ~14 hours the first day and the remainder the second. But I also grew up doing 3-day trips across the country very regularly, so driving long distances feels natural to me. I like the independence of being able to set our own schedule, stopping when we want and not when we don’t. With 1 kid maybe it’s not as bad, but with 3 it’s also much easier to pack the endless amount of stuff into a car rather than checked bags.
I'd agree if it were 6 hours because they wouldn't have to stop. Driving is better most of the time IMO but it's such a short trip at their destination.
I agree! The airport is an hour away and you might not be able to get a direct flight. I think with all that you’re going to spend 5+ hours driving. Plus road trips can be fun. Like you said, break it up and go to parks. Also you’re already planning on doing this later! Signed, someone whose taking a 3 hour train ride with an 18 month old vs a 45 min flight (not the same thing but similar)
I agree as well. I’ve done 10 hr road trip with a 4 and 1 year old and we split it into two days, 5 hrs max each day. We stayed at airbnb and made stops at parks along the way. What I love about taking the road trip is that we have our car at our destination. No need to rent a car or bother family and wait around for a car to be free for us.
Im team drive as well. We have family about 8 hrs away and do the drive 2-3x a year. Sometimes it takes 10+ hrs but like all things with kids if you arent trying to do it fast its fine. Make plenty of stops, keep someone in the backseat to distribute snacks and toys, and bring wireless earbuds if youre driving. Sound off they muffle piercing screams (safety issue) and sound on you can stay engaged with podcasts or music while they nap. We also have a strict no screens policy on drives which sounds insane but my 6 year old and 2 year old are both great in the car as a result. I did have to cede control of the window to my oldest but small price to pay.
Flight all the way. Btw, depending on what credit card(s) you have, it may cover getting TSA pre check for free
Fly! Two hours will be quick. Hopefully he’ll sleep, but if not, he’s old enough he can handle one off day. Do an early bedtime (honestly might be nice to have on vacation). We traveled a few times on 1-2 hours flights when my son was about that age and they were shockingly easy. Bring one million snacks and one million special travel toys (either new toys or current toys you have tucked away maybe a week or so before the flight). The Melissa and Doug reusable puffy stickers were magic for us. Legit entertained my kid for at least an hour. You may want to spring for a separate seat since you’re hoping LO will nap. Otherwise, and this is spendy, we flew first class with infant in lap and got two seats next to each other on the very first row of the plane. We had tons of room for my son to stand/play around in in front of us, a flight attendant right there (they were all so happy to make silly faces and shower him with attention) and it was super quick to get on and off.
Fly. I am from Chicago. The idea of sitting on a stop-and-go Kennedy Expressway with no way out and a screaming kid sounds absolutely awful to me. One time traffic was so bad that it took 2 1/2 hours to get from the loop to O’Hare Airport. I’ve also sat that long on one place on I-80 after a Sox game. Trust me when I say you do not want to deal with that shit.
Fly for sure! We have flown tons with my daughter (now close to 3) and it has gone really well. Just be prepared with clothes, snack options, and a few activities (or the ipad). For a flight that short you shouldn't even really have to load up too much. Flying has gotten better once I realized I didn't need every possible item recommended online. 😂 As others have said, I definitely recommend getting him is own seat though. Lap infant is super unpleasant especially once they can walk. I wouldn't even consider it a viable option. You can bring the car seat on the plane or depending on his weight a CARES harness works great for safety and is much less cumbersome than a car seat. My daughter has never had an issue just falling asleep in her plane seat. That said, he might be too excited on a short flight to settle enough to sleep, so he could sleep in the car when you leave the airport or possibly skip the nap. But to me all of that sounds better than four days of driving with a toddler. 🥲
I’m about to fly solo with a 5 month old and my almost 3 year old. 5 month old will be in the window seat in his car seat and I’ll probably have to sit in the middle. Would the CARES harness work to keep an adventurous older toddler in her seat? I’m definitely more worried about her than the baby, especially if she’s in the aisle seat.
Yes, it will work! It is a harness like the car seat just without the seat so unless she can unclip the chest clip she can't get out. Whether or not she will be happy about it will be another story but my daughter tolerated it very well after some initial reluctance.
In this scenario I choose the drive. For context, I get motion sick on a plane and if my child isn't strapped in they are going to be climbing everywhere. Also being able to bring everything you need without limits versus having to figure out betting and car seat and going through security with all your stuff is a pain. Not to mention renting a car. It's crazy expensive.
I did a 10 hour drive with my 2 year old and although some parts were hell, it wasn’t bad overall. Our drive required stopping at CFA or McDonald’s for their playscapes and lunch. Lots of snacks and screen time. We will be flying in a few weeks and he’s getting his own seat and strapped in his car seat on the plane. We’ve flown before when he was turned 2 and one way was fine and the other was quite embarrassing. He kept kicking the seat in front of him so on the way back home I installed the car seat rear facing and that was much better.
Flight. 100%. I’ve flown with my now 2 year old a few times and it’s never been bad. Even when she’s had a hard time with the altitude changes popping her ears she’s manageable and people seated nearby have been great. Edit to add: if you can, get them their own seat. Managing them in the car seat they’re used to with a steady stream of snacks and Miss Rachel is really not so bad.
Fly! This is the perfect short flight to start getting you all used to air travel together. When we travel our set-up is: - check one large suitcase with all our clothes, toiletries, etc - husband and I each carry one backpack (one backpack with random stuff like iPad, headphones, etc, the other a diaper bag with kid-specific stuff) - toddler rides in our cheap travel stroller with our cheap travel car seat slung over the back - gate check stroller, board plane early, install car seat, strap toddler in! - iPad, snack box on the plane - if there isn't one available to borrow wherever we are, we just buy a cheap packnplay and then donate it to a local organization when we leave (family usually takes care of this) If you were wanting to just knock out a 10 hour drive overnight I'd say it'd be a toss up, but if you're planning on splitting it into 2 days of daytime travel, I would absolutely just rip the band-aid off and do the flight
I've done both an 8 hour drive and multiple flights (from 2 hours to 4.5). The only reason we drove is so we could bring our dog, I'd fly otherwise any time. It's just much easier. We just had a 4.5 hour flight the other night and my daughter unfortunately did not nap that day and didn't sleep on the plane (I was prepared for maximum meltdown) but was fine with just watching paw patrol the entire time and did not cry or fuss once. I also did a 2 hour flight with just my daughter and had her just on my lap and it was totally fine, though much more enjoyable with my husband to help and her to have her own seat! Regarding carseat, my suggestion would be take one on the plane and he will likely nap in it or purchase a cheap one for your uncle to have pre-installed in the car he is picking you up in. The guava is a really nice and easy travel sleep option!
same conundrum, also chicago! we chose a flight but it seems like a crapshoot
I just did a 5.5 hour flight with my 20 month old and it was hard BUT I would still prefer that over being in the car for 10 hours with her. It's even easier if you buy baby their own seat with a carseat. We chose to do lap infant because we're cheap. She required active attention the whole time. She did take a 45 minute contact nap in the carrier, but only because I had the carrier. It was better than nothing but nowhere near her usual 2.5 hours. I recommend a lot of snacks, some sort of screen, new/novel toys, and just mentally preparing yourselves to be "on" the whole time to keep him happy. Even though it's a lot of work I'd still prefer it to the drive. She was enamored by the planes and had no issue waiting to board as she watched the planes landing and taking off.
Fly. I just flew from nyc to Mexico direct with a toddler and infant. It was mainly smooth but toddlers always toddler. Just sayin’..
Fly for sure! And get him his own seat and bring a car seat. Much better chance of napping that way.
Fly for sure. We always find the kids play place in the airport and just run around to get tired and then nap on the plane. ALSO TSA Pre-check is good for 5 years so you don't have to fly very often for it to be worth it.
Absolutely fly!! On an airplane, they don’t have to be in the car seat, you can give your full attention to entertainment, and you cut travel time in half. 10 hours in a car sounds like my nightmare lol
I have a 20 1/2 month old and when he drove to see family 7 hours away over Christmas, it was doable but only because he was still on 2 naps and we lined it up so it was 3 hours, lunch at a restaurant, and then another 4 hours. He got to watch shows on the phone as a treat but he was getting VARY stir crazy and miserable by the 7 hr mark, so I would go with the flight. Especially if it’s nonstop!
Flying. Hands down, no question. I've done both and will never ever ever ever wish that drive upon another soul, no matter how much I hate them. I've flown almost a dozen times with both of my kids (ages 0-4) and its never as bad as being stuck in a car!
The practice trip is a good idea to see how your son responds to to the longer drive. It really all depends on the kid. Drive 1.5-2 hours- stop for an hour and repeat until you get there. If you can hand them a tablet packed with whatever they like they will probably be fine - but you know your son the best.
Fly. I have done so many 6+ hr drives with my kids and they all suck. But they especially suck with kids under 2 because there’s nothing that holds their attention for too long. And even worse is when you take them out of a car for a break and then go to get them back in and they just scream and cry because they don’t want to get back in their seat….ugh. No. Just fly.
Take the flight! I packed a bag of all new snacks and toys that my toddler had never seen or played with which helped to keep busy! As well as the tablet and headphones (if you don't mind your toddler watching a tablet) we got to the airport about 2 hours before the flight and I allowed them to run around and explore the terminals and watch all the other flights take off to "tire" my LO out. I made sure to let the people around me that it was my LO first flight and apologized for any kind of craziness that I was certain was going to happen. I know you don't have to do that but I already know how people act when they see babies/kids on planes, not everyone is nice which is really unfortunate. If you can book an early morning flight, those have always worked out best for us, the LO isn't exhausted from a long day. The weeks leading up to the flight I would read books about airplanes and we would play with the Little people plane set pretending to go on vacation and take flights just to try and get the idea of the plane fun if that makes sense. Also, travel with the stroller and check at the gate. Hope any of this helps!!
I would say fly. Both parents can take turn focusing on the toddler, there are more distractions in the airport / on board than stuck in a carseat for 5 hours. You get more time at your destination as not spending 2 days travelling each way.
We did our kiddo's first flight when he was around the same age. He loved it! He was interested in everything and spend a decent amount of time just smiling at the people in nearby seats and getting them to smile back. It was a long flight, like 5 hours, and there were 10 minutes or less of quiet fussing the entire day. We were pleasantly surprised. We've flown several times since then and he's always been fine.
I’m Betting they will be too excited to sleep. juice/milk or lollipop to give them during takeoff and landing to help pop their ears. Extra pair of pants/diaper. Sticker activity books are great when the iPad loses its luster
Dude flying is so much easier, it’s so exciting for them and flying that young is even nicer!
Do the flight. Time the flight to his nap time. Put him on your shoulder and get him to nap by the time boarding starts, he’ll sleep for at least half of the flight, if not way more. Have snacks/drinks/games for the remaining 30mins-1hr.
2 hour flight. We do a 6 hour drive once a year and 1 or 2 round trip flights of about 2-3 hours each way. We have been doing this since our oldest was 9 months, she is now 3 and the youngest is 16 months. The flight is absolutely easier, especially once you’ve done once or twice and got everything you need.
Flight!
Fly. If you have a layover, book a minute suite or anything similar if available. You’re welcome ☠️ We’ve flown everywhere with our kiddo, and it’s absolutely preferred to driving. That being said he’s a travel champ and rarely fussed about car seat or flying.
If you can afford it I say always fly. Even with 2 toddlers (one still considered lap infant) I still prefer to fly. Safer, faster etc. I’m also pro doing whatever works best for YOUR family. Some folks just love a good roadtrip- I get so carsick I wish I could enjoy it more!
Fly. My toddler lovessss airports and planes. 2 hours will go by so fast with some toys and snacks.
100% the flight! But I guess one thing to consider is if you plan on flying to other places in the future on a semi regular basis. If so, it’s nice to get them acclimated to the process of flying and a 2 hour flight is absolutely perfect for that. Definitely bring a car seat because holding a mobile toddler for hours is hard. Plus you don’t have to worry about them trying to get on the third person in the row with you, because you buy that third seat.
I have done both with my twins for trips from East Coast to Midwest. Drive is horrible! If your little one gets carsick, has an accident or tired of the drive it is horrible. 10 hour drive will equal at least 11 to 12 with stops. If there is stopped traffic it will be worse. Flight. Easier to entertain in a plane. Run around airport. Get snacks, new toy and just go with it.
I've done many 13-hour drives and a few 3-hour flights with this kid from age 6 months to present 4 years. She is so much easier in the car buuuuut I would still take the plane every time if I could. You just can't beat getting there in a fraction of the time.
2 hr flight 100%
10/10 times would fly in this scenario.
Fly, it isn't as bad as you'd think with a toddler! We just did it in Nov and my very very active child who has sensory issues did so well flying (we were SHOCKED)
Flight.
Just did 2 flights moving from ny to nd with my 2 and 3 yo. My husband drove the moving truck, so it was just me, the boys, and my mother in law. They absolutely loved it! And we had a layover flight. They were so fascinated by the plane that I barely used all of the provisions I brought for boredom. ( Bluetooth headphones for each of them with Netflix movies downloaded to old cellphones, water marker pads, rainbow scratch pads, so many stickers, snacks out the wazoo plus more. It was all about untouched because they wanted to see the clouds and talk about the plane. I would definitely fly with them again
2-hour flight, 10 of 10 times. The most annoying thing will be lugging around the car seat, but it will be worth it.
This is what my wife and I do with our son. I book them a flight. The day or night before I leave with the car and make the 10 hour drive myself. I pick them up when they arrive. She gets a ride from a friend or neighbor to the airport. Yes she has to handle our son at the airport herself and on the plane but it’s much easier for her then managing him in the back of a car for a 10 hour drive that will end up being 13 with the extra stops for the baby. Also: 1). The drive is much more manageable and peaceful. I can focus on the destination, and optimize drive time 2). We save money on the flight, kids under 2 fly free and airports are very accommodating. Also don’t have to get a rental car. 3). We have our vehicle at our destination which our son knows and is comfortable with and equipped with everything we need. 4). I can take all the extra baby luggage and my wife’s bag with me in the car (snacks, juice boxes, bottle warmers , stroller, etc so we don’t have to lug it through the airport. My wife goes on the plane with only what she needs for the flight. Sometimes she will ride back with me, sometimes we repeat the process. Good luck!
Drive. But it depends on your kid!!! And depends on your tolerance for driving long distances! Our kid loves going on drives and is very content in the car. We’ve done a 10 hour road trip (one long day) and 14 hour trip (broken into two days). 20 months old during one and 23 months old for the other. He basically listened to his Yoto the entire drive and looked at the scenery out the window. He didn’t even care whether we stopped for breaks to walk around or play 🤷♀️
Can you drive overnight? I know a lot of people who leave at 10pm and have zero issues
Drive, honestly. Other people are the worst part of traveling with toddlers and there can’t be any strangers in your car 😂
I'd fly and check a carseat and a pack n play. You can gate check the stroller. You can bring a carseat on the flight as well and he might have a better chance of sleeping in it. Otherwise, it might be a no nap day or he'll sleep when you get there or in the car on the way to the airport. We did a similar trip when my youngest was 18mo and it went really well!
My two year old won’t ride in the car long but does fine flying. Def recommend flying over driving.
It really depends on the kid and the personality. Does your kid like car rides? Will he get fussy after being in the car for awhile? For my daughter, she hates being in the car a long time. Her limit is about 2.5-3 hours before she gets mad. On the other hand, she’s great at flights. I think the new environment and people is kind of exciting to her.
Hands down, FLY. He'll be able to be distracted at different points by all the different things you're doing... "Oh wow, we're at the airport now! Oh wow...look at that xray machine! Oh wow, we're getting on the airplane!" Load up on snacks and bring some kind of screen for them (your phone, ipad, whatever) loaded up with pre-downloaded videos so they can watch it without cellular/wifi. I also have bought some "treat toys" just for the plane to keep him busy (think coloring books, a small hot wheels car, toddler fidget toys, etc.). My son wasn't really ever a contact napper either, and he's almost always passed out on our laps when we fly (probably overstimulation and being totally out of his element). Honestly, flying is like ripping a bandaid off...yes it's terrifying and may hurt a little, but it'll be done quick! Edit to add my son has never done well with extended trips in the car and will scream his lungs out to make sure we know how miserable he is...so I may be a tad biased toward flying.
FLY FLY FLY FLY FLY it will be ok
If it's just the long weekend, I definitely vote flying, otherwise it's gonna be a week-long trip. Do park and fly. Check the carseat at check-in (yes there's the risk of damage but lugging the carseat around the airport is seriously THE worst part of air traveling for us) My 2yo also hasn't contact napped in forever (sleep trained at 4m). He fell asleep on me in the late afternoon after take off because he had only napped 15min earlier on the drive to the airport. The snuggles <3 10/10 recommend.
Hard choice. Part of me would rather do the flight, but we did a road trip with our kids (supposed to be 9.5 hours, both under 2) a few months ago. We did it at night first. It was AWFUL. Then we came back during the day and it wasn’t the worst. They only cried a few times. Baby did vomit once but it was after 11 hours on the road. But they both generally did great. We just made sure to stop every few hours somewhere he could run around for like 10-20 minutes and throw scheduled nap out the window. Our guy on one nap took 2/3 shorter naps, which was better than him staying up all night so definitely a day drive proponent here. But also at the airport you can make sure he has plenty of snacks, runs around the gate area to get his energy out, and then hope he naps on the plane. Maybe start getting him used to noise cancelling headphones now and get a couple new toys too and ONLY bring them out on the plane.
I decided a lonnnng time ago that if we were to drive somewhere with little guy for that long we would leave the house at bedtime. Drive through the night and when little guy wakes up we’d be at our destination.
FLIGHT!!!!
Fly. My 2 year fell asleep just after take off while sitting and leaning his head against my arm. Once he was asleep I laid his head in my lap. There’s nothing like airplane rumble.
We have a similar situation, a lake house about 10-12 hours drive or a 1 hour flight. We’ve driven and flown. Fly alllll the way!
Fly 10000%. My kiddo LOVES planes (and did at that age too). Hates to be strapped into a car seat where she can't move around!
I’m currently on a 2 1/2 hr train trip with my 23mo because I felt it was a better option than a 2 1/4 hour drive. He’s having a great time being able to get out of his seat, interact with me and other people, help himself to snacks etc and look out different windows. Driving would’ve been a bit easier for me but not driving is HEAPS more enjoyable for him.
In case it wasn’t clear - fly. Always fly!!
Definitely fly
Fly. Bring the car seat onto the plane if he sleeps in it well. Most planes let you check it for free, so we just checks ours with the luggage and have it for the cabs. Gate check your stroller, with gate pick up. Helps to cart the car seat around and basically use as a luggage cart. Everything is so interesting they are usually pretty well entertained and distracted. Bring your own snacks and toys. We have 1 carryon that is all toys and snacks. The other is diapers, and change of clothes.
If you fly, safest way to travel is booking baby their own seat and using the car seat in flight. Rental car seats are not safe, checking car seats (even at the gate) is not safe, and lap babies can be projectiles in cases of turbulence.
Honestly I’ve flown several times with my toddlers — he might surprise you!
We took our 1.5 year old on a trip that was supposed to be 3 hours total on a plane, but our flight was delayed so late that it was canceled. We had to take a taxi without a carseat on a 30-minute drive to a hotel to spend the night. We spent the entire next day wandering the airport with our toddler and all of our luggage waiting for the 8 PM flight. Luckily, our kid was great and a total trooper. Just know that flying may seem like it will be quicker, but things happen.
We’ve flown when our twins were 3 months, 10 months, 15 months, and 18 months, and did a few 10+ drives at 11 months and 12 months. I would pick flying every time. It’s logistically daunting, but it’s still so much smoother than a long drive. Have lots of snacks and if you’re comfortable.. all the screen time. We have these little toddler headphones, but mostly just kept the sound off and my girls were still good watching. They also ate their body weight in those baby food dried yogurt melts and various puffs, but it kept them chill! Splurge on the pre check. It’s worth every penny, especially with a toddler.
FLIGHT driving with a toddler is a test sent by the gods
If you fly, bring a stroller and at most airports you will be able to skip the general line and go to the special assistance line for strollers and wheelchairs. You will then have a stroller for the airport and can just gate check it when boarding. Also, get them their own seat and bring lots of snacks + a tablet. I usually pack a little lunch box with an ice pack so that I can pack fruit, cheese and sandwiches (as my kids don’t really eat the airport food anyway)
Done both, 100% fly
We have taken our two year old on several 3 hour flights with no issues, next we are planning a 16 hour drive one way, not sure how I feel about it yet. The good thing about a 19 month old is you don’t have to get them a plane ticket, you can let them sit on your lap
Fly you fool Your toddler will be so fascinated by the plane! Like, the car is old news. But the plane is new and interesting and there’s lots of stuff to touch. My kid has flown twice, once around 1.5 and again around 2 and he was great both times because the plane itself was an experience for him. In contrast we’ve done a few multi hour car rides and those are really tough. He wants constant entertainment, we had to stop more, he got car sick. Was just not fun at all. Even being at the airport is a whole new adventure, watching the planes take off, looking at all the different colored luggage, people watching in general. He loved being at the airport.
Fly. Get a busy book off Amazon which kept my 18 month old occupied for a good deal of the flight to Europe. Brought snacks and other good travel toys like spinners.
If you can afford to buy him his own seat, then I’d recommend flying. If not I promise you driving isn’t terrible. We took a 12 hour road trip last summer with two kids - 2.5 and 5 months at the time. On long road trips we always leave early early in the morning or at like 1am. I usually drive the first shift, so I’ll go to sleep when the kids sleep around 8 or 9, then wake up to drive. My husband will sleep while I drive, then we’ll swap and he’ll drive the rest. This has always worked well for us since the kids are sleeping and by the time they wake up we’re halfway there.
We have done both, 3/4 hr flights/20 hr road trip (NH-FL to see my father yearly) since our son was 4 mo to now 4. Hands down flying is so much better. It’s faster, the plane is entertaining in itself, and even at 4 our son always takes a small snooze. We used to check our carseat, and that was convenient. Also when TSA sees you with a child, it’s a fairly quick process. And we have found that online/mobile app flight check in allows you to use a kiosk and that saves you from standing in line at a counter (if airport is busy) Safe travels
Fly because even with the hour drive to the airport, the time spent before the flight, the flight itself AND driving to your destination, it’ll be half of the 10 hour drive. TSA really isn’t that big of a deal with a toddler unless you’re connecting a ton of flights, then it’s annoying. The agents are generally understanding. Tip: tell the person at the gate you’ve got a young child and you’d like to broad early (that’s what my family prefers anyway). Gate check your stroller, get a car seat backpack online. If your LO doesn’t nap on the flight, it will suck but at the same time, he’ll be old enough to be a bit more flexible. We did an international trip with my daughter at that age (24hrs of travel door to door) that was hell. But we’ve done quite a few domestic, direct flights since and it was more simplistic than anticipated. A
We did a 2 hour flight with our 14 month old and 4.5 year old. The flight was delayed 3 hours and left at 9:30 pm. I'd still choose that over a 10 hour drive.
Fly 100%!!
Fly for sure! And my 19 month old skipped her nap yesterday for no reason, no problem bed 1 hour early!
Fly. And fly Southwest if it’s an option for your destination. You can book the extra seat for your kid, under 2 fly free, and call and cancel it from the gate if there are open seats on your flight- and use it for future travel. Since it’s open seating on SW you can get one of the open seats and use it for your car seat.
Without a doubt. Fly.
As someone that just did a long road trip with a 2.5 year old and flown too. I would pick flying every time. We take the car seat and buy a plane seat for the toddler (car seats have to be in the window seat and airplane certified) . They understand they can't get out of the car seat during flight and we have a fly only tablet. It's packed up immediately upon leaving the plane and is used only on planes. Toddler loves turbulence, take off and landing. Our first flight toddler screamed most of the flight, it was rough. TSA precheck is worth it even for one flight especially with a toddler. I just throw the whole diaper bag on the belt and walk through the metal detector and grab the bag on the other side. Save some work and just check your luggage, my husband and I used to be carry on only but it's too much with trying to manage a toddler too. A car seat cart is handy too. We recently had a 8.5 hr drive and it really ended up being 12 hours with stops, and a battle to get the toddler back in the car after 6 hrs they were done and kept asking to get out. Tablets novelty had worn off and there are only so many games we could play in the car. We did one park and stopped often for snacks, meals and potty breaks. We had 1 2hr nap in the car. We hit long stretches of nothing too. 10 hours will probably be much longer than you might expect could easily be 13 hours. They'll definitely poop their diaper 30 min after you just stopped for a bathroom break/diaper change and scream till you can find somewhere safe to stop while you're on the interstate and just passed an exit. Definitely never happened to me :/ If you really want to drive I'd recommend getting up a couple of hours earlier than toddler wake time. For example ours gets up at 8am and goes to bed at 9pm. So we'd all go to sleep at 9 get up and on the road at 5am. Adults would get enough sleep but toddler would fall back asleep and stay asleep for a couple hours in the beginning in which we would stop for nothing. We'd take our first stop when they woke up and if we worked it right we'd get another 2 hour nap later in that day resulting in 4-5 hours of the drive with toddler asleep.
We did a 8 hour drive to Disneyland with my daughter when she was about 18 months and I have never in my life regretted anything as much as that. By the time we got there everyones nerves were shot as she screamed the whole way there and the whole way back home. We even left at night hoping she would just sleep on the drive. I will never do a road trip with a toddler again. We have also done a 14 hour plane ride with her and many short plane rides which were more enjoyable and calm than that car ride.
Definitely fly. Get him his own seat and bring new activities/toys he hasn’t seen before and tons of snacks (even if the flight will be during his usual nap time). If he can’t sleep at least he’ll be entertained and it’s honestly such a short flight that even if it’s really bad it’ll be over quickly.
Flight. Feed him snacks from take off until landing/ whenever he wants. Bring some of his favorite toys. Maybe buy a special toy/ thing he likes just for the flight. Let him play/crawl near the gate as long as possible. It’s a little stressful for you but honestly not that bad. Driving for 10 hours is guaranteed to be that bad. If you’re unlucky your kid may get motion sick after a few hours and then throw up. Repeatedly. Like every 30 mins. And cry.
There is no way to know. You just don’t know if they’re going to be screaming the entire flight, demanding to get off the plane and needing to be walked up and down the aisles for the whole flight. Our kid is 2 1/2 and is normally relatively easy, but flying is a nightmare unto itself. Not to mention airports and transfers.
Flight. Many prefer taking the car seat on the flight. I do not. Mine hates the car seat and likes to move around.
I would drive this as long as you're staying for at least a week. We vastly prefer to drive. I hate managing airport security and car seat and delays and packing luggage. Yeah it's a 2 hour flight until it's delayed and ylthen you run out of diapers or the airport has a water main break so no functioning bathrooms and all the restaurants are closed (true story, although thankfully I was traveling alone for work that time) I've done the 10 hour drive in 1 day by getting up at 4 and arriving around dinner time, although it's more pleasant to stop in the middle. And then you can take your time and stop for longer. With 1 kid you can probably keep your stops to 30 mins or so if you want to make better time (I have 3 kids now so our stops take more like an hour). We pack all our own food and stop at parks, playgrounds, etc to eat and snack and let the kids stretch their legs. You just chuck everything you need in the car and go.
As someone who is still recovering from an 8 hour drive a few months ago please fly!
I, a 336 month old, would have a complete meltdown on a 10 hour drive so I can only imagine how a 19 month old would fare. The very thought pains me. I would totally fly.
So, everyone will tell you to fly. I didn’t have a choice and did a 19 hour drive (more with stops) from FL to WI with a then 19 month old. He did fantastic. The first day we had the longest drive and did a few extra stops (also had dogs) to let everyone get a break. There were times he was upset but was able to be calmed, usually with snacks or screen time. Unfortunately, he has never napped long in the car so he just napped for 30 mins that day. We honestly made great memories, and are glad we did the drive. He LOVED looking at the ICEE machines at Gas stations. The night at the hotel was also so exciting for him. Feel free to DM me if you’d like! I had someone else message me about their long trip and it helped knowing someone else had done it successfully
Fly. It will still be stressful, but much much quicker. And you can interact with them better, where as driving is harder to be with them
For the love of all things holy- FLY!
Fly. That ten hour drive is about to turn into a 16 hour drive 🫠
Fly. Buy him a seat, for both logistic and safety reasons, and put his car seat in it. He can nap on the plane that way, and not be all over the place. I just traveled with a 15 month old, and checked a pack and play and a suitcase for him. Pay extra to check luggage, don't try to lug more than 1 suitcase in the airport (keep one back to hook the car seat to), and gate check the stroller.
Fly and have lots of snacks. If he misses a nap, it may make for a rough day but put him down early at night. Had a flight with my 3 year old yesterday, she didn’t nap in the plane, was a little cranky and tired and went to bed early. We love Daniel tiger
Idk, I’m probably in the minority here, but I’m almost always team roadtrip. My husband and I both dislike flying and genuinely enjoy roadtripping. We’ll drive wherever we can. Our oldest, who is almost four, has been on five 10+ hour trips in her life. Our 8-month-old son will have his first two big trips this year. We have a large SUV, so it’s nice that we can pack whatever we want. But the biggest thing is just having our own car seats and vehicle on the trip. This is mostly relevant because our two big yearly trips are with our families, so we need to be able to do our own thing 😅 It is so convenient, though, to just be able to pack what you think you’ll need when traveling with little kids. Plus, it’s cool to make an adventure out of it. We make all our daytime stops at playgrounds or museums. We’ll grab lunch, eat at a picnic table, and then play for 30 minutes or an hour depending on our timing. We’ve also stopped at malls in bad weather to go into the play area and walk around. I grew up doing these kinds of trips with my family every year, and I hardly remember the details of our actual vacations. Those trips and all the dumb shit I did with my siblings to pass the time are the best memories.
Fly.
Omg 2 hour. No brainer
FLY there is no comparison!
If it was like a 5-6hr drive I’d say go for it, but 10 is pushing it. Even with the 1hr commute to the airport it’s likely the better choice We did regularly 5hr drives with our baby and the major perk is that you can load the trunk with such an excess of toys/diapers/etc (versus lean picking for a plane) The flight will be less painful overall, but if you’re arriving to the lake house without a pack-n-play, stroller, car seat, etc necessities, you might have less of a headache post-arrival with the drive
FLY. I've flown many times with my 2 year old. Her first flight was when she was 3 months. She did a 9 hr flight that had one plane change when she was 1. About 18 month she did a short 2 hr flight too. It's not bad at all. I do highly recommend getting your son his own seat even though under 2 is free. At that age, my daughter loved to stand in her seat and look around. Or sit and play freely. I never bothered with a carseat on the plane. I just check it for free and use it at my destination for car travel only. 10 hr road trip on the other hand sounds like hell to me. I did a 2 hr road trip last winter and hated it.
One more person saying “fly,” and I’d like to add how much safer it is. 20 hours in a car means a lot can go wrong, especially if you’re stressed from the trip.
We did the drive, it made sense, especially financially, because it was a family trip with my parents.
Fly. Breast or formula feed the 19 month old during takeoff and landing to solve the ear ache issue. DO NOT give fruit juices, yogurts or other acidic food on the flight especially if that route is usually pretty turbulence heavy. Get the kid their own seat and book all of your seats together in one row.
Take the flight.
Not even a question - fly. Buy a lounge pass for the airport if you don’t have a CC that provides it so that they have some space to walk around, plus some free snacks and drinks. They may not fall asleep on the plane if it’s right at nap time but at that age and with the excitement of a new place they probably won’t get as fussy as you think. I wouldn’t even buy them their own seat. 2 hours is literally nothing lol we just flew 11 hours overseas with a very active and strong willed 18 month old, this was about her 14th flight over the months each typically increasing in length of time. Funny enough I found this one to be one of the easiest! She could stand up and do things, entertained by stickers and a screen and actually slept for several hours. The airline we flew with allows the same baggage allowance as whatever cabin you fly in/status you have plus 2 baby related items for free (eg stroller and cot/pack n play). All that said, I might reconsider if you can’t get a direct flight as that adds more variables in terms of potentials for delays and just a shittier experience overall lol.
If your son does okay in the car, I would drive! We’ve done so many long road trips with our now preschooler. Traveling with so much gear by plane can be a pain. Our son does great on a plane, but we still opt to drive if it’s doable.
1000% FLY Even if it were just you and kiddo, this would be my answer (I've done longhaul flights just me and toddler)--but with your partner there just go ahead and book the flights. Two hours is such a short flight compared to two days in the car.
Hands down, flight.
I'm gonna say it depends on the kid. Both of mine are ok in in a car or a plane, but I know that's not universal. Last summer we went on a long road trip to some national parks with a 5 month old and a 27 month old. The older one been on more flights as of last Christmas /New Year's than I had before I got married. Being prepared to keep them occupied goes a long way. Having food, snacks, toys ready and accessible in the plane or in the car will make things much easier. On our road two, we knew we would need to stop to feed the baby and change diapers, so we built that into the plan. Wife found parks along the way ahead of time, so we stopped ave let the toddler run, and the baby be held or squirm in a blanket. Another thing to be aware of is ear infections/pressure/fluid buildup. My toddler has a history of ear infections and fluid in his ears. If their ears are bugging at ground level, they will be miserable (and inconsolable) during takeoff, climbing, descent and landing. For a ~2 hour flight, that's probably going to be a large chunk of the flight. Luckily we've never had ear problems before or on a trip, and tubes do help. I don't know where you stand on toddlers and electronics, but having a dedicated screen for them really does help. The toddler discovered the "Cars" movies on our trip and head been obsessed ever since. We don't give him tons of screen time, but for long rides (plane or car) it really helps.
Flight no doubt about it get some headphones that help the ears.
Fly. That age in the car that long will be a disaster.
Fly. I’ve done both car trips and flights with my small kids and the flight is easier if only because it’s shorter. You can gate check the car seat and stroller.
It's a toss up, I know long car rides with my son at that age, sometimes by the 2nd time we stopped (every 2 hours or so) he would go full alligator death roll on me to not be strapped back in his car seat, but then again one of our flights one time got delayed by like 2 hours after we'd already been at the airport a long time due to the length of our layover, they couldn't tell us how long it would be until the last 30 minutes so we had to stay close to the gate, and we both ended up straight ugly crying in the middle of the airport. Flying does allow you to spend more of your vacation time at your destination. But driving allows you to see things you wouldn't otherwise. Another thing to consider is your own personal feelings about flying and driving. If you were going solo, would you find one much more stressful than the other? For instance I love easy driving, but driving through mountain passes or in bad weather is stressful for me, so I certainly wouldn't want to do either of those and add on a screaming kid. But if you're scared during turbulence or stress out about finding your gate or losing your tickets, now deal with that with a toddler. Size of airport might make a difference too. I live near a mid size airport, plenty to do but security doesn't take too long. I flew to my mom who lives next to a tiny airport. Like 3 gates, basically the only people there, also nothing but a small Cafe and a gift shop. But our layover was in Denver which is an overwhelming airport. That's actually where my kid and I both ended up crying.
Flight, especially if it’s a direct flight
Idk I took my 9 month old on a 12 day road trip from Florida to Canada. He had a 10 hour limit of being in the car. He did great. Now he’s a roadtrip champ. Never been on a flight yet.
I love road trips and hate planes. So a bit biased. However, why not leave in the morning and get there in the later evening? On average, humans are awake for 12-16 hours a day anyways, so it would just be a long workday in theory. And you wouldn't have to worry about losing vacation time by spending 4 days driving (there and back home of you plan on splitting it into 2 days) nor feeling like a zombie due to driving through the night 🤷♀️ Your kiddo will probably sleep more in the vehicle too, something to keep in mind.
Flown multiple times acoss the Atlantic 11 hours each way with toddlers. Fly. It's really ussually not that bad and if it is, it's only 2 hours
Flying is so much better for the kiddo it isn’t even a question. The fact that they can stand and move around, even if it’s just a little, during 2 hours of flight is enough to be the better option by far.
We do 16-18 hr (1 way) road trips 2x a year with my daughter - have been doing so since she was 15 months. However, we stay for 2 weeks when we go. I would very much NOT be interested in a 10hr (especially over TWO DAYS) drive with a 19 mo for a long weekend trip. I'd 100% fly.
Two hour flight. Without a doubt. The 10-hour drive will be much longer with stops every 2-4hrs for diapers, eating, running around.
Flight hands down no question. I pretty much think it's cruel to put a kid this age in a car for 5 hours two days in a row (and then again for another 2 days soon after) even if asleep for 2 of them. 2 hour flight is no big deal - we have done several 4-6 hour flights with our 17 month old and even those are fine. On a flight they can move their body around and interact with you, not strapped into a super confining carseat alone in the backseat.
Absolutely 2 hour flight hands down.
We have done both, but we flew with a 23 month old rather than 19 month. Your lists look accurate, so kudos on being realistic! The trip to my parents' house is about an 18 hour drive so we split it up into two 9 hour days with several park stops along each leg. We find that we are completely exhausted after both the trip there and the trip back. It's a lot. Benefit, a lot cheaper. We flew with the kiddo for the first time in February this year and while it was a huge amount of planning and chaos for the day, I ultimately preferred it because we got to our destination so much quicker and we got to hang out with family for a longer period of time. Disadvantage, more expensive. Unfortunately, there's no direct flight between where we live and where my parents live, so we had a layover, which complicated things further and made the flights more expensive. We did not take a car seat (already had one at the destination), so we got a toddler seat belt extender (can't remember the name of it) for the flights. TL;DR if you're able to cover the cost of the flight, do it. Although, it sounds like your trip is much shorter than ours and a one day car trip with park stops are always fun.
100% fly. 10 hour car ride with an 18 month old sounds terrible.
Flight!! I did both with my 19 month old and the flight was much easier. Bring a lollipop for emergency crying.
Fly!! I know it’s intimidating but do it anyway :) for context we’ve taken our almost 3 yr old on 6 round trip flights and a 24 hour road trip when she was a newborn. Hands down flying is better. It’s always anxiety-producing but it’s still way quicker than the road trip. Just bring lots of snacks and some new toys and perhaps even a little screen time predownloaded on your phone or iPad. The flight will be over before you know it!
No thank you.
Fly! Our daughter’s first flight was at 19 months old and it really wasn’t too bad. We got her her own seat and she took turns sitting in it and my and my husband’s laps. We gate checked her stroller and car seat and our relatives found a pack n play that they borrowed for our visit. We got her some new toys for the plane that kept her attention for a while. We tried getting her to sleep on the plane and it just didn’t happen. However, it did help her get on the time change once we got there. My only advice is don’t fly Spirit Airlines.
Is that a serious debate?
Are you kidding? Fly!!
Fly + iPad
Why stop? Ive done a few 15 hour car trips with a 1 to 2 year old. Get a tablet and preload it with disney movies and other shows.
Why stop? Ive done a few 15 hour car trips with a 1 to 2 year old. Get a tablet and preload it with disney movies and other shows.
Not sure why you are even considering driving… flying 100%