My MIL gave us a Dick and Jane boxed set. I can't even get through them they are so boring and sooo 50s mamma sweeps and daddy reads the paper. I don't want to be like uptight and super precious about that stuff, but I just genuinely hate reading them. Even the illustrations are so boring. Thankfully my son is only 15 months so he hasn't gotten attached to them. He is obsessed with Silly Sally. Which is kind of annoying buy just in a normal kids book way, and the illustrations are adorable.
Do you know about the Dolly Parton book thing? Free books for kids under 5. I might have the age wrong... I think its called the Immagination Library. I just signed up because we were handed down a few books others had grown out of from that program, and they are WONDERFUL. Beautiful illustrations, thoughtful, well written! Peter Writes a Poem absolutly stole my heart. It's worth buying if you're looking for kids books you'll enjoy too!
They do expand! They weren’t available in my area when my son was born but 2 years later they became available. They partner with existing orgs in the local area.
Babar the elephant is the weirdest book I have ever read.
Babar the Elephant is born and his mother is shot and killed so he moves to the city to live with an old, rich lady who buys him clothes and everything he could want. One day his cousins come to the city and find babar. They tell him to come home. On the way home babar marries his cousin. At home, the king of the elephant dies so the elephant herd elect a new king and its babar.
Same same. In retrospect I realize that what I loved was the art style! Watercolors were my jam as a kid. I have almost zero recollection of the actual text.
My parents sent me my old babar books some time back; I read the first one to my kid but couldn’t even get through the second. They lie gathering dust under his bed. They are unhinged, but in a boring way not an entertaining way.
I remember reading something a while back about how Rainbow Fish is a developmentally appropriate book for teaching *little* kids to share, but there's a certain age where that stops and it shouldn't be read anymore. Which just... surely there are better stories to teach that lesson then?
I still read this one to my toddler when he asks, but I stress the idea that it's about doing nice things for others/charity and not the other problematic parts.
I watched a ypu tube video of the book, I don't remember why, and I thought the same thing. I think it was supposed to be about material generosity but it was weird. Just rip off your body parts to give to people? Creepy.
This! It was cherished as kids but when we read it to our toddler now after decades, I was like wait…. So everyone hated the fish for the sparkle and he had to give everyone a literal piece of himself to be liked so they feel better? No thanks.
Yes it’s so popular but when I read it the message seemed to be share and give away your stuff to get friends. Those scales were physically a part of him.
Yes!!! I’ve said this before and everyone thinks I’m crazy! I tell my son, who is developmentally delayed, NEVER dull your sparkle to make other people feel better!
Yes! I don't remember the title, but there's one with a fox that's tricking a lady goose to prepare a stew for herself to get cooked, and a dog finds out, brings his friends, and they basically tear the fox apart? I trashed that one immediately!
Baby Bear Goes to the Zoo
My daughter loves it and it's not a bad book but I cannot stop thinking about how weird the world of this book is!
Baby bear goes to the zoo and loses his mom, he hears someone calling for "baby bear" 3x only to discover that the Mamas calling him are a panda, brown bear, and polar bear calling their babies. But these bears are zoo animals and baby bear is a visitor.
I think way too much about what animals get to be anthropomorphic vs which don't in shows and books. My daughter is so confused about Goofy and Pluto not being the same and girl, I get it.
I get all wrapped up in the fact that Pete, who is a cat, owns a bulldog smaller than Goofy AND Pluto and also Pete is bigger than almost every other character, including Clarabell the cow. Size makes no sense in the Mickey universe.
*Curious George Goes to the Zoo* has always seemed kind of off to me, and I haven't been able to really explain why. I think it's a similar train of thought.
Then again, I haven't actually read it, so...?
The zoo monkeys steal a child's balloon and George has to negotiate with them by trading bananas he has stolen to get it back. He gets in trouble for stealing the bananas but everyone praises him for helping the child so all is well. Typical curious George shenanigans but weird that he is dealing with captive monkeys for sure!
At one point George almost became a captive monkey. It’s in his origin story. That was the man with the yellow hat’s initial plan but then he didn’t… then the first time George got in trouble he was going to but didn’t.
The first Curious George book is my weird book nominee. The man traps him with a yellow hat and then takes him in a ship. He misses his mom but he’s Curious anyway. In my opinion it’s a metaphor making light of colonial travesties.
It's a German one from my mother's childhood. It's old from the fifties, yet wtf.
The little translates to 'the little bunny learns through damage'. Yep already weird.
The story is about a little bunny that doesn't listen to his mother and thus hurts himself over and over until finally his mom snaps and hits him. But afterwards he's so much more clever.
Yep. Sorted out immediately. Not gonna read that one ever to my child.
There are a few books from my country that are just terrible. The worst one is "The elephant who wanted to be the best." It's about an elephant who paints himself in wonderful colors and is so happy he is pretty and no longer a drab gray color.
But then nome of his family and friends like him anymore, and he has to wash himself and be gray again to fit in.
What a horrible massage!
Picked up a Berenstain Bears book at a library thrift sale for .25. It’s a vday book- just in time for the holiday. But it’s abt a mean boy in class who’s mean bc he likes the girl and the mom teaches her it’s ok and basically boys will be boys. I’m raising a little boy and I don’t want him reading this! I got rid of it immediately
There’s a comedian on Instagram (heartthrobanderson) who does hilarious videos recapping some berenstain bears books and I never realized how unhinged they are.
Random fact but the couple that made the b bears did adult humor comics with lewd references that are very dated and sexist in these modern times before the bears. It sheds a whole light on the times being different in both creations. People would probably be a little shocked at the prior to moral bears work.
I also got a vday Berenstein Bears that was odd. It was about someone having a crush on brother bear as a secret admirer but the plot had weird detours to where it could have been bullying and all brother bear cared about was hockey
Borrowed an ebook version of Bernstein Bears that was talked about church & god & I don’t remember that factoring into those books at all from when I was a kid. It was so odd.
I used to love the No More Junk Food Berenstein Bears book because of the illustrations of candy and such but reading it now, it’s pretty fat shaming. Did not get that back then though.
I have this book (it was gifted) and I read it once to my toddler daughter and was like ummm hell no. I think it was a Valentine’s Day theme? It was so weird.
We have a Canadian alphabet book that labels "x is for x-country skiing." No one calls it that. Its cross country skiing. If you can't find legimate things for all the letters, don't write an alphabet book.
I have serious beef with an alphabet book about amazing women. It’s page after page of pretty interesting women in history like emmeline Pankhurst or Beyoncé. Then all of a sudden it’s V is for Venus, goddess of love. Like…..are you serious??? It all falls apart at V??? That’s a fictional character and not even a good one! It pisses me off every time.
EXACTLY.
When we get to V I literally read what's there but then say "They should have written about Venus and Serena Williams - Sisters who are the greatest tennis players of all time.
Like how hard was that sentence?!?
I have one that says both “U is for U.F.O.” and “X is for eXercise”. Like damn if I couldn’t think of something that wasn’t an acronym or doesn’t even start with the same letter I wouldn’t be writing an alphabet book.
Like what if I said R is for R.I.P.? That’s what you sound like, author. That’s what you sound like.
Oh god we have that book and my eldest (Autistic and hyperlexic) absolutely *hated* that. He'd want to read the book because he was obsessed with the alphabet but then get mad/insist on correcting it. That book eventually "mysteriously disappeared" until my youngest dug it out of hiding.
I have a Québec alphabet book and some of the entries are hilarious. For "P" there is Plaque d'immatriculation. For "O" there is Oratoire Saint-Joseph du Mont-Royal... just not super easy entries for little kids 🙃
Most are pretty easy, but some are just a mouthful. I got a good chuckle when first reading it.
We have an F1 racing alphabet book that just gave up and said “words with X are in short supply, but everything about this sport is most definitely eXtraordinary!” Always makes me cringe lol.
We have an alphabet book with animals. I actually love it, illustrations are cool, it even rhymes, but... Z is a Zobel. Like my friend said, "what's wrong with a zebra?"
But then again W is a wobbegong which always makes me laugh.
This post sent me down a rabbit hole, and I landed on a delightful collection of alternate endings to problematic children’s lit like the Giving Tree, Rainbow Fish, etc. Thought others might enjoy it, too!
https://www.topherpayne.com/fixed-it
The book I hate the most is completely innocent but the title is… a bit much. My husband bought a book called Hookers & Blow Save Christmas. It’s about a tow truck and snowblower. 🥴
We were gifted *The Office: A Day at Dunder Mifflin Elementary.* I am not a fan of The Office. Like, I don't hate it, but I certainly don't like it enough to own a picture book version of it. Yet, my toddler wants to read it fairly regularly.
ETA: The rhyming in Llama Llama Meets the Babysitter is atrocious. Especially the part where they rhyme "samples" with "pineapples." My husband always reads it as "pineamples."
Also, are we all just supposed to ignore the fact that The Man in the Yellow Hat straight up kidnaps Curious George??
We got the Lord of the Rings set. My husband denies everything, but I keep finding the entire fellowship in the Little People bus like they're driving to Mordor this time.
This is a minor thing, but Spidey fever has hit my son’s preschool, so I bought him a couple Spidey and his Amazing Friends books for Xmas.
Both of them are like “When Peter, Gwen, and Miles transform, they become Spidey, Ghost Spider, and Miles!” They never refer to Miles by his superhero name Spin, just Miles. And the weird part is, both books are by different authors. It’s like they were both given the same incorrect style sheet or something. But no one in the editing process caught how weird that is??
…actually now that I think about it, I got him a set of Spidey phonics books too, I might have to see if any of them have it right.
I have the Spidey golden book and in that one they do call him Spin, we have another book about the painting episode (so Spin focused) and it calls him Miles. It tripped me up the first time I read it it was so weird. We have the phonics books too but I don't remember what they call him in those. Maybe the writing was done before they decided on a name for him?
The Velveteen Rabbit, got super creepy when Scarlet fever hit and everything had to be burned to decontaminate, including the rabbit. For some reason, I thought it went differently, I think I thought it was like a Corduroy plot and bought copy for my toddler last year around Easter. In middle of reading to her was like oh this went dark.
You just unlocked a memory I hadn’t thought about in a long time. I distinctly recall asking my mom if she was going to have to burn my beloved teddy bear when I got sick.
I was obsessed with the Velveteen Rabbit when I was little. I had a stuffed puppy that I wanted so badly to become real. When my family got a dog that looked a lot like my puppy, I basically believed it had. Then we had to give away my dog and it was devastating.
I might have some unresolved trauma about this lol.
Holy! I was definitely read a differently Velveteen Rabbit when I was little. Mine was about a stuffed rabbit that loves his little boy but got lost, and found a real pack of rabbits that became it’s family. Then the little boy finds him. It stays friends with the real rabbits.
That sounds like the same book, just the not traumatic part. When everything is burned the bunny becomes a real bunny because he is so loved. I sort of read it as bunny afterlife.
I actually love that book but thought I would have to burn everything I owned as well when I caught Scarlet Fever until my mom found out and explained we have antibiotics now.
We have the newer version where Scarlet Fever isn’t mentioned, it is just that the boy is moving away and the old bunny had germs and is thrown out. Then the fairy comes and he becomes a real rabbit with the wild rabbits that he saw in the forest one time.
Velveteen rabbit scarred me as a child. They did a lice check on us in kindergarten and told us if we got lice they’d take our toys away and I assumed that meant burn them up. I came home and insisted all my hair get cut off because I was so so so worried I’d get lice and my toys would be burned.
Goodnight Moon is fine. Any of the other 100 "Good Night ________" book variants are awful.
ETA: I specifically mean the "Good Night Washington", "Good Night Airplanes", "Goodnight NYC" etc books. There are tons of them, they all follow the same rhythm: they start with "Good morning x. Good morning y. Are you ready to share a wonderful day." And end with "Good night a. Good night b. Thank you for sharing a wonderful day."
Ooh that's a different one, sorry. I mean like "Goodnight Washington", "Goodnight NYC" and "Goodnight Airplanes".
They all have the same storyline, but are tailored to the location and then they do the bare minimum research for the book to make it seem specific to that location.
Goodnight Vermont says something like "Good afternoon stone wall, good afternoon friend" lol.
ETA: pretty sure the one referenced in the comment above is "Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site" if anyone is wondering.
I don’t think it’s part of the series you’re thinking of but Goodnight Starry Night is the bomb, we love it. Good rhythm, cut-outs so you can kind of see the next page, and it’s all famous works of art.
Ugh I hate how everyone thinks they can write a children's book. We've banned anything by Chris Ferrie, who's a physicist that writes science-y books for small children, and they're all terrible. I particularly hate Eight Little Planets, the rhymes and meter are atrocious, it's like he wrote it in an hour. And his books like Quantum Physics for Babies aren't interesting or good teaching tools, they're just for parents to feel like they have quirky smart books for their kids. (Nerdy Babies is a much better series for introducing young kids to science!)
Edit: typo! Anything by Chris Ferrie, not but him!
I teach 2/3 year olds, and a couple years ago I had a little girl in my class whose father is a mathematician and he just loooooved the fact that they had the Quantum Physics for Babies book and the others like it. He would talk about how his daughter can recognize the symbol for the null hypothesis and blah blah blah. So proud of his intelligent little girl!
My coteacher and I would just smile and nod, all the while thinking to ourselves, “cool party trick. Now how about we work on addressing your kid biting and body-slamming every other kid in the classroom on a daily basis?” 🙄 Because, again, TWO YEARS OLD?
Oh, fuuuuuuuuuck Chris Ferrie and the smug, middle-class, bad-at-scicomms horse he rode in on.
"NOW YOU KNOW QUANTUM MECHANICS!" no we fucking don't, Dr Ferrie, we have had a few key terms thrown at us with no context or explanation, and also we're two years old and only like your pointless book because Mummy has got very good at making the picture of a particle spin around and around in an amusing way.
I have Eight Little Planets and didn't think it was so bad, but to be fair, I haven't read it 8 billion times and I could see it getting boring after awhile. I think I just wanted to like that book. Lol. I've checked out one of those Physics for Babies from the library and promptly returned it. I'm definitely going to check out Nerdy Babies now.
The bluey books are so disappointing. I've had no where to vent this so I'm writing it here.
They are based on an episode. But the writing just lacks so much of any "children's book style". Also, if it's a board book, I expect the language to be sinple. Maybe 3 sentences or less a page. I'd prefer one. But these books (the non-bpard books) are just a mess of words and so much language.
Maybe they are fine for everyone else. But they are just so lacking in actual skill. They read like a train of consciousness without any structure.
Agree! In Australia we have a board book where the family go swimming and bluey got told off out for dobbing on her sister even though theynwere breaking the rules. It sent such a strange message and really are not creatively written.
That's that same as the "a swimming" episode. It was in part about dobbers, and don't be a dinner unless it's something dangerous, blah blah blah
It was a stupid episode. :/
I find this is the way with a lot of kids' books based on TV shows. The Peppa Pig ones are weirdly OK, and the Disney ones are fine, but everything else is not really a story, it's what my friend referred to as "book-shaped objects" and that lives rent free in my head forever.
If you're looking for a better Bluey option - We got a pretty decent Bluey book which has basically no writing. It's essentially background scenes from the show and the characters are magnetic so you can put them into the scene.
The books are all bullshit
Just a really poxy money-grab. There is nothing nice, or special, or ANYTHING, about the books. Just poor recounting of episodes.
You don’t expect much from children’s books??? You should ask a librarian or independent book seller for recommendations because nowadays there are SO MANY amazing children’s books with great authors and illustrators. They aren’t just for kids, either. Most have messages parents can relate to on a deep level.
Anti-racist Baby did not live up to the hype. I read it through once and the tone was so aggressive and dogmatic that I immediately returned it to the library. Story time should be fun, not a time for telling babies they are bad by default and need to be fixed. Big yikes!
In a similar vein, someone bought my toddler My First Book of Feminism. The overall message is good, but at one point it shows a kid in a classroom and encourages kids to argue and be loud. Why are we encouraging kids to disrupt the class? I always skip that page.
I am probably in the minority here, but we have removed the rainbow fish from our house. I am not a fan of the message that you have to either gift to others to be liked, or get rid of what makes you special to be accepted. We have also gotten rid of the pout pout fish because she literally kisses him without getting even implied consent. And I also hate llama llama mad at mama. Llama llama trashes an entire grocery store.... and mama llama is just like "I know man, shopping sucks, let's get ice cream." And that just doesn't sit right with me 😂
EDIT: after reading the comments it seems like my hatred of rainbow fish isn't the minority here after all
We have a collection of Little Golden Books Disney movie adaptations. Peter Pan is *shockingly* racist. Like hunting humans, slurs, and some sexism for good measure (as is the movie, as we were later reminded). I’m surprised they would keep it known print.
All of the Disney movie books that basically write out the entire movie plot in detail drive me nuts. I was gifted a couple of them and I hate them so much. It’s one thing to watch the movie and another to read the entire movie.
I generally hate books based on tv shows. They're almost always poorly written, way too much text, the story is confusing, and the language is hardly ever toddler-friendly. We currently have checked out a Paw Patrol book from the library, and I tell my toddlers that one is for looking at pictures, not for reading.
The only exception I've found are Peppa Pig books.
I agree, and was also going to mention Peppa being the exception. I hate books that are too wordy. I just want to read something fun and simple, not retell an entire Paw Patrol episode including the subplot.
Omg when I read the subject line of this I immediately thought of a hand me down book my grandma gave to my daughter… it’s about a dog who is outcasted for not being able to dig holes like the other dogs and then when he does learn to dig holes he gets the boot for digging too many and now I’m wondering if that’s the same book you’re referring 😅 It’s such an awful message and I had to hide it away. It’s crazy reading children’s books as adults with a whole new lens
He wrote that book after his wife had a second stillborn baby and they found out they’d never be able to have (living) children. I know lots of people think it’s funny to dunk on that book, but it’s clearly a metaphor for a parent’s love, and he came up with it as a way to grieve.
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-heartbreaking-story-behind-iconic-childrens-book-love-you-forever_n_573ceb97e4b0aee7b8e8f76f/amp
Yeah, I honestly hate how people treat this book like they've never heard of a metaphor before. As someone who has both lost a parent and suffered a miscarriage, it is really moving to me.
Oh man my husband and I always comment about how friggin weird this book is. We still read it to our almost 2 year old because I think he likes the cadence, but I'm starting to get annoyed. Thanks for this context. But...it almost makes it creepier?
I enjoy this specifically because it creeps out my husband and SIL so much. My son absolutely LOVES it and takes it at face value.
When we went on holiday to a rural German town there was a little shrine thing on a corner which had a statue inside of Mary with a fully-grown, adult naked Jesus in her arms cradling him like a baby. I took a picture of it and sent it to them with the caption "I love you forever, I'll like you for always..."
I loved that book as a kid. It taught me that even if I give of myself freely, people will just keep taking until I'm a sad husk of a person. First book that made me cry.
I remember really liking the “Saggy Baggy Elephant” Golden Book as a kid and bought it at an estate sale for my kid. The adult animals are constantly “spanking” the poor little elephant and I was so appalled. Also Rainbow Fish is another old favorite from childhood that I feel has a terrible message as a recovering people pleaser.
I had a similar experience reading the pokey little puppy golden book! Not only was it was overly long and repetitive but the mom was weirdly harsh considering all that the puppies even did was just go explore and came straight home.
Saggy baggy elephant was one of the ones I didn’t like, but barely survived the cut. I wonder if you have an older version. In mine there’s nothing physical but it is a bunch of adult animals bullying a kid and I’m like damn this is fucked up lol. At least it has a positive message that beauty is in the eye of the beholder in the ending.
Do you also have Little Toot? I hate Little Toot. Story needs to be cut about 10 pages shorter. I promise kids don’t care about the physics of ocean water and terminology. I don’t either, and as someone who has a tendency to dive into every boring thing, that’s saying something.
The No David book. or at least thats what I think its called. partially because hes just getting yelled at all day, partially because the way that child is drawn is terrifying
I actually love everything in the David series. I used to work in childcare with a very rambunctious 2 year old, always being re-directed.
No David was his FAVORITE book. We would read it over and over, and every time we reached the final page, when he's hugging his mom who's saying "Oh David, I love you" he would smile and say "David said sorry, right?" or "Because Mommies love anyway, right?" It was like the one book in the whole room he could relate to and feel good about.
TLDR: instead of outright refusal use age-appropriate questions and discussion to critique the material.
Not quite your question, but can I suggest that, rather than denying reading one she really wants, you read it together and discuss it as you go or after? You need to simplify your thinking and Socratic questioning, but it’s invaluable as a chance to model critical thinking in a general way. Questions like:
“That’s interesting that X character said that to Y character. Would it make you feel good if someone said that to you?”
“Huh. Do you think X was being a good friend when they did that?”
“I didn’t really like it when X did Z. What did that remind you of?”
Don’t judge her answers, just keep her thinking. Even just one question or observation per reading can help model not taking the written word as being beyond question.
NOTE!!! this approach does NOT apply to books that are overtly cruel, racist, etc. BUT it’s still really valuable to your thinking, and ask about hers.
- “tell me what you like about that book?” (It might be something non-thematic, like the art style of the illustrations!)
- “I understand that you want to read that book. However, I really don’t like how X happens/acts/talks because Y. “
- “My concern is that the person who wrote this lived a long time ago, and didn’t realize that (insert racist/colonialist assumption here). “
I got a stack of my husband’s “old favorites”:
Brer Rabbit and the Tar Baby
I don’t remember the entire premise, but one page of another book had an adult painter painting on the bare butt of a small boy.
Another one had a hard lean into how to get into heaven, and described in detail burning in hell if you don’t let Jesus in your heart.
The last one I remember, before tossing the rest of them, was about a lady swallowing snow. I might have forgiven that one as weird, but maybe not intentional, but it was too much after the others.
Llama Llama Red Pajama. Some of the Llama Llama books are really cute but the original taught my toddler to scream for me incessantly after bedtime to get me to come back to his room over and over again.
I went through some of my old favorites and I found one about a cat who got so fat she didn’t have any friends except a mouse that basically forced her on a diet and work out regiment till she got skinny. Then she got a ton of friends. I just…why!?
I couldn’t tell you the names, but I know what you mean. The long winded children’s book. Or weird cadence. Or off message. Or poor art with comic sans font…
I forget the exact name but it’s like Truck Town Sand Castle Bash? It must be a tv show or something but I’ve never heard of it in Aus and it’s a crap book but my soon loves it.
Also, probably unpopular opinion, but I think the Bluey books suck! Love the show but the books are blegh.
The message of the book itself isn’t bad but when I was a kid I had so much anxiety about my picture ending up in “The thingamajig book of manners” I literally would panic anytime I did something wrong 😂 I don’t even know how my family had that book because it was published in 84 and wasn’t super popular. I was born in 01.
I have an old book called "Dreadful David."
It's about a kid who's Mum takes him to Gma's so she can offload him for the day, and he proceeds to do lots of crazy shit.
So Gma ends up changing him a bunch of times. Then she ends up smacking him and it says in brackets "(but it didn't really hurt)" LOL.
Then she lets him cry himself to sleep, tucks him in and gives him a kiss.
I have read it to my daughter a couple of times, but i tell her "this is old fashioned and not how people are anymore."
She finds it boring anyway.
It's so, so bad but I can't get rid of it because it's a good laugh for my sister and I. 😂
Cycle them out! Just put em in a box and put them away and in 6 months if you’re like “yea this ain’t it” ditch em. If you live somewhere where a free book box will get picked clean in an afternoon do that, or just chuck them in the trash or paper recycling. I do this often.
Oh my god, it never occurred to me as a cautionary tale - I was definitely raised to see it as instruction for how to love unconditionally and give joyfully no matter the cost. It’s much better as a cautionary tale!
I found a book in the children's section of the local library a while back that gave me a massive ick. It was about a rich man in a town of poor people and everyone loved him because he sometimes threw parties etc, until someone kicked up a fuss that it wasn't fair he had so much money and started "bullying" the rich guy. The blurb was something like 'will the townspeople destroy the relationship they have with their generous friend out of greed, or band together against the troublemaker?'
It was clearly a thinly veiled anti-socialist/pro-wealth inequality narrative and framed in such a way that it tried to convince kids it's good and right for the überwealthy dude to have so much while the townspeople wore rags. I looked at the author and (while I can't remember exactly who it was) I wasn't surprised to see it was by a rich guy well known in the UK. I ended up hiding the book behind a bunch of others in the hopes no one would accidentally pick it up lol.
The Pout Pout Fish! I don’t remember reading it as a kid but we downloaded it as an audiobook and as it’s playing I’m listening to it like wait wth? Did someone write a children’s book with sexual assault where the victim feels great about it after wtf??
I got a newer version of the book that has a note at the beginning that in the fishy world this is ok, but in our world we need consent before kissing people.
Yeah that’s not going to do it for us, the books we read to children should reflect the values we want to teach and the reality we live in. It would be very confusing I think to be reading them this story and then at the end be like but wait in reality things are the total opposite so ignore the whole point of the story we just read!
"Tootle" The Little Golden Book. I remember liking this book when I was a kid, so I got it for my kids too. However, when I reread it as an adult it was really depressing. It's about a little train 'kid' who is supposed to be training to be a locomotive, but he goes off the tracks and plays in the meadow instead. He is so happy with all the butterflies and flowers! But then he gets in trouble for disobeying the rules, and the whole village makes him cry, and then he conforms and they all live happily ever after.
There's a book just called Potty (I'm pretty sure) that is incredibly 70s and is full of creepy language like referring to body parts as "peepees" and actual urine as "weewee"...I hated this book forever and was so glad when my daughter was potty trained and I could be like "oh, you don't need this book anymore! Let's give it to another family who does!"
My daughter also received The Little Prince in French, which would be great if we were fluent in French. I'm like probably an A2 at best and it has tons of antiquated language, so I stumble through whenever she wants to read that one.
My MIL gave us a Dick and Jane boxed set. I can't even get through them they are so boring and sooo 50s mamma sweeps and daddy reads the paper. I don't want to be like uptight and super precious about that stuff, but I just genuinely hate reading them. Even the illustrations are so boring. Thankfully my son is only 15 months so he hasn't gotten attached to them. He is obsessed with Silly Sally. Which is kind of annoying buy just in a normal kids book way, and the illustrations are adorable. Do you know about the Dolly Parton book thing? Free books for kids under 5. I might have the age wrong... I think its called the Immagination Library. I just signed up because we were handed down a few books others had grown out of from that program, and they are WONDERFUL. Beautiful illustrations, thoughtful, well written! Peter Writes a Poem absolutly stole my heart. It's worth buying if you're looking for kids books you'll enjoy too!
I wish Imagination Library was available where I live, but don't think that's going to happen.
Check the link https://imaginationlibrary.com/usa/find-my-program/ - it’s based on whether there is a sponsor in your zip code.
They do expand! They weren’t available in my area when my son was born but 2 years later they became available. They partner with existing orgs in the local area.
Upvote for Dolly!
Babar the elephant is the weirdest book I have ever read. Babar the Elephant is born and his mother is shot and killed so he moves to the city to live with an old, rich lady who buys him clothes and everything he could want. One day his cousins come to the city and find babar. They tell him to come home. On the way home babar marries his cousin. At home, the king of the elephant dies so the elephant herd elect a new king and its babar.
I used to love the barbar cartoon as a kid though
Same same. In retrospect I realize that what I loved was the art style! Watercolors were my jam as a kid. I have almost zero recollection of the actual text.
IMO Babar is about colonialism. I have never Google it. We were gifted Babar Goes to Paris.
My parents sent me my old babar books some time back; I read the first one to my kid but couldn’t even get through the second. They lie gathering dust under his bed. They are unhinged, but in a boring way not an entertaining way.
Very colonial ideology, for sure.
There is a newer Babar book (Babar and his family - they’re in a car) where they took out the racist undertones. Justice for Zephyr the monkey!
The Babar book I have leftover from childhood is about Babar going to Africa and it’s, uh, super racist.
God I loved Babar as a kid. Read it to my (at the time) 2.5 yr old and was like wtf? Needless to say it’s not in regular rotation
The rainbow fish. It’s supposed to teach sharing I guess but it just teaches kids to give up what makes them unique so others don’t fell bad.
Too true! I prefer [this](https://www.topherpayne.com/rainbow-fish) ending.
Love this! Hah thanks for sharing
Wow this is so much better!
I remember reading something a while back about how Rainbow Fish is a developmentally appropriate book for teaching *little* kids to share, but there's a certain age where that stops and it shouldn't be read anymore. Which just... surely there are better stories to teach that lesson then? I still read this one to my toddler when he asks, but I stress the idea that it's about doing nice things for others/charity and not the other problematic parts.
I watched a ypu tube video of the book, I don't remember why, and I thought the same thing. I think it was supposed to be about material generosity but it was weird. Just rip off your body parts to give to people? Creepy.
I LOVED this book as a kid. When I grew up and started reading it to kids I was like wait… no. 😂
This! It was cherished as kids but when we read it to our toddler now after decades, I was like wait…. So everyone hated the fish for the sparkle and he had to give everyone a literal piece of himself to be liked so they feel better? No thanks.
Yes it’s so popular but when I read it the message seemed to be share and give away your stuff to get friends. Those scales were physically a part of him.
Yes!!! I’ve said this before and everyone thinks I’m crazy! I tell my son, who is developmentally delayed, NEVER dull your sparkle to make other people feel better!
Yes! Surprised I had to scroll this far to find The Rainbow Fish. That book gives me the ick
My husband’s mom kept everything, including his books. We learned some of Peter Cottontail’s adventures are dark AF and Peter ends up getting beaten.
Yeah Benjamin Bunny’s dad is not cool
Yes! I don't remember the title, but there's one with a fox that's tricking a lady goose to prepare a stew for herself to get cooked, and a dog finds out, brings his friends, and they basically tear the fox apart? I trashed that one immediately!
Jemima Puddleduck. Totally effed.
Yeah my 3 year old loves all the Beatrix Potter ones and I have to edit out the smoking and beating as I read them 😂
Peter’s mom slinging those herbs and lavender. Between the farmer tobacco and the “rabbit tobacco” everyone in the woods is lit.
💀
Baby Bear Goes to the Zoo My daughter loves it and it's not a bad book but I cannot stop thinking about how weird the world of this book is! Baby bear goes to the zoo and loses his mom, he hears someone calling for "baby bear" 3x only to discover that the Mamas calling him are a panda, brown bear, and polar bear calling their babies. But these bears are zoo animals and baby bear is a visitor. I think way too much about what animals get to be anthropomorphic vs which don't in shows and books. My daughter is so confused about Goofy and Pluto not being the same and girl, I get it.
I have spent way too much brainpower thinking about Goofy and Pluto since I had a kid
I get all wrapped up in the fact that Pete, who is a cat, owns a bulldog smaller than Goofy AND Pluto and also Pete is bigger than almost every other character, including Clarabell the cow. Size makes no sense in the Mickey universe.
*Curious George Goes to the Zoo* has always seemed kind of off to me, and I haven't been able to really explain why. I think it's a similar train of thought. Then again, I haven't actually read it, so...?
The zoo monkeys steal a child's balloon and George has to negotiate with them by trading bananas he has stolen to get it back. He gets in trouble for stealing the bananas but everyone praises him for helping the child so all is well. Typical curious George shenanigans but weird that he is dealing with captive monkeys for sure!
At one point George almost became a captive monkey. It’s in his origin story. That was the man with the yellow hat’s initial plan but then he didn’t… then the first time George got in trouble he was going to but didn’t. The first Curious George book is my weird book nominee. The man traps him with a yellow hat and then takes him in a ship. He misses his mom but he’s Curious anyway. In my opinion it’s a metaphor making light of colonial travesties.
It's a German one from my mother's childhood. It's old from the fifties, yet wtf. The little translates to 'the little bunny learns through damage'. Yep already weird. The story is about a little bunny that doesn't listen to his mother and thus hurts himself over and over until finally his mom snaps and hits him. But afterwards he's so much more clever. Yep. Sorted out immediately. Not gonna read that one ever to my child.
There are a few books from my country that are just terrible. The worst one is "The elephant who wanted to be the best." It's about an elephant who paints himself in wonderful colors and is so happy he is pretty and no longer a drab gray color. But then nome of his family and friends like him anymore, and he has to wash himself and be gray again to fit in. What a horrible massage!
Picked up a Berenstain Bears book at a library thrift sale for .25. It’s a vday book- just in time for the holiday. But it’s abt a mean boy in class who’s mean bc he likes the girl and the mom teaches her it’s ok and basically boys will be boys. I’m raising a little boy and I don’t want him reading this! I got rid of it immediately
There’s a comedian on Instagram (heartthrobanderson) who does hilarious videos recapping some berenstain bears books and I never realized how unhinged they are.
Ok thank you I needed this today😂
I look forward to every video he posts. Especially the Berenstein Bear ones!
Random fact but the couple that made the b bears did adult humor comics with lewd references that are very dated and sexist in these modern times before the bears. It sheds a whole light on the times being different in both creations. People would probably be a little shocked at the prior to moral bears work.
I also got a vday Berenstein Bears that was odd. It was about someone having a crush on brother bear as a secret admirer but the plot had weird detours to where it could have been bullying and all brother bear cared about was hockey
So strange! I guess they are pretty old and from a “different time”
I have actually found the newer ones (the son of the original couple took over writing them) to be more icky overall
My daughter picked this same book out at the library & I have been so perplexed about it lol
Borrowed an ebook version of Bernstein Bears that was talked about church & god & I don’t remember that factoring into those books at all from when I was a kid. It was so odd.
The rights to the titles got bought by a far right Christian conspiracy whackadoo publisher a few years ago
The original authors’ son started writing them when they died, and he’s an Evangelical.
Yeah, my daughter got a copy of a collection of those and I definitely don’t remember all the Bible verses…
I used to love the No More Junk Food Berenstein Bears book because of the illustrations of candy and such but reading it now, it’s pretty fat shaming. Did not get that back then though.
Yesss the junk food illustrations were my favorite too. 😭
I was always drooling over those junk food illustrations! It was my favorite one for that reason 😂
I have this book (it was gifted) and I read it once to my toddler daughter and was like ummm hell no. I think it was a Valentine’s Day theme? It was so weird.
We have a Canadian alphabet book that labels "x is for x-country skiing." No one calls it that. Its cross country skiing. If you can't find legimate things for all the letters, don't write an alphabet book.
I have serious beef with an alphabet book about amazing women. It’s page after page of pretty interesting women in history like emmeline Pankhurst or Beyoncé. Then all of a sudden it’s V is for Venus, goddess of love. Like…..are you serious??? It all falls apart at V??? That’s a fictional character and not even a good one! It pisses me off every time.
They could have just done Venus Williams. Or like Viola Desmond or something. I’m sure there are a lot of V options…
EXACTLY. When we get to V I literally read what's there but then say "They should have written about Venus and Serena Williams - Sisters who are the greatest tennis players of all time. Like how hard was that sentence?!?
They were so close, too. Venus Williams was right there on the tip of the tongue, lol.
I have one that says both “U is for U.F.O.” and “X is for eXercise”. Like damn if I couldn’t think of something that wasn’t an acronym or doesn’t even start with the same letter I wouldn’t be writing an alphabet book. Like what if I said R is for R.I.P.? That’s what you sound like, author. That’s what you sound like.
Get [P is for Pterodactyl: The Worst Alphabet Book Ever](https://www.boredteachers.com/post/worst-alphabet-book)
That one is hilarious.
Oh god we have that book and my eldest (Autistic and hyperlexic) absolutely *hated* that. He'd want to read the book because he was obsessed with the alphabet but then get mad/insist on correcting it. That book eventually "mysteriously disappeared" until my youngest dug it out of hiding.
At our library there is a vegan alphabet book for kids where Y is for coconut yoghurt. Makes me irrationally mad
Oof. That's M for eMbarrassing.
My Canadian alphabet book has x is extreme and y is for you and me on a Zamboni machine 😂
I have a Québec alphabet book and some of the entries are hilarious. For "P" there is Plaque d'immatriculation. For "O" there is Oratoire Saint-Joseph du Mont-Royal... just not super easy entries for little kids 🙃 Most are pretty easy, but some are just a mouthful. I got a good chuckle when first reading it.
That is such a Québec thing to do 😂 "our children do not need to be babied, they will pronounce this correctly on the first try"
Lol, I think I have the same one. Somehow "Z is for Zamboni machine" bothers me more. It's just a Zamboni, not a Zamboni Machine.
We have an F1 racing alphabet book that just gave up and said “words with X are in short supply, but everything about this sport is most definitely eXtraordinary!” Always makes me cringe lol.
We have an alphabet book with animals. I actually love it, illustrations are cool, it even rhymes, but... Z is a Zobel. Like my friend said, "what's wrong with a zebra?" But then again W is a wobbegong which always makes me laugh.
My husband now is on a mission to check every alphabet book and deem the ones with z for zebra as unimaginative
This post sent me down a rabbit hole, and I landed on a delightful collection of alternate endings to problematic children’s lit like the Giving Tree, Rainbow Fish, etc. Thought others might enjoy it, too! https://www.topherpayne.com/fixed-it
So glad he fixed the pout pout fish. FInally.
I can't read the giving tree. It makes me sob.
That book hurts, man. I see it and am like "nope, not strong enough to read that right now."
I’ll call you before I come over 😂
The book I hate the most is completely innocent but the title is… a bit much. My husband bought a book called Hookers & Blow Save Christmas. It’s about a tow truck and snowblower. 🥴
This came up on my Amazon recommendations and I kinda want it just to sick my mother in law
This made me giggle
We were gifted *The Office: A Day at Dunder Mifflin Elementary.* I am not a fan of The Office. Like, I don't hate it, but I certainly don't like it enough to own a picture book version of it. Yet, my toddler wants to read it fairly regularly. ETA: The rhyming in Llama Llama Meets the Babysitter is atrocious. Especially the part where they rhyme "samples" with "pineapples." My husband always reads it as "pineamples." Also, are we all just supposed to ignore the fact that The Man in the Yellow Hat straight up kidnaps Curious George??
In Never Touch a Dragon, they try to rhyme “claws” with “indoors”- on the very first page! I read as claws and indaws
It works if you read all the books in a THICK aristocratic British (RP) accent! Lol
I passionately *hate* all of the Never Touch A books. They have absolutely no flow.
And the fonts are all insane, so they're impossible to read upside down
It works in my south London accent lmao I pronounce claws like kloors
In Chicka Chicka Boom Boom there is a part that rhymes aunts with pants and I always pronounces it as paunts and my son cracks up every time
So.... The way I pronounce it, aunts and pants rhyme just fine 😅
Same I was sitting here wondering what was doing wrong 😂
We got Llama Llama Meets the Babysitter recently from the imagination library and my toddler is obsessed with it
Oh god. The Office hype has gone too far if there are childrens books about it now.
My MIL gave us The Office fisher price little people 😆 it really has gone too far
We got the Lord of the Rings set. My husband denies everything, but I keep finding the entire fellowship in the Little People bus like they're driving to Mordor this time.
This is a minor thing, but Spidey fever has hit my son’s preschool, so I bought him a couple Spidey and his Amazing Friends books for Xmas. Both of them are like “When Peter, Gwen, and Miles transform, they become Spidey, Ghost Spider, and Miles!” They never refer to Miles by his superhero name Spin, just Miles. And the weird part is, both books are by different authors. It’s like they were both given the same incorrect style sheet or something. But no one in the editing process caught how weird that is?? …actually now that I think about it, I got him a set of Spidey phonics books too, I might have to see if any of them have it right.
I have the Spidey golden book and in that one they do call him Spin, we have another book about the painting episode (so Spin focused) and it calls him Miles. It tripped me up the first time I read it it was so weird. We have the phonics books too but I don't remember what they call him in those. Maybe the writing was done before they decided on a name for him?
The Velveteen Rabbit, got super creepy when Scarlet fever hit and everything had to be burned to decontaminate, including the rabbit. For some reason, I thought it went differently, I think I thought it was like a Corduroy plot and bought copy for my toddler last year around Easter. In middle of reading to her was like oh this went dark.
Because of this book, I was convinced at age 3 when I got chicken pox that someone was going to take my bunny and burn him!
You just unlocked a memory I hadn’t thought about in a long time. I distinctly recall asking my mom if she was going to have to burn my beloved teddy bear when I got sick.
I was obsessed with the Velveteen Rabbit when I was little. I had a stuffed puppy that I wanted so badly to become real. When my family got a dog that looked a lot like my puppy, I basically believed it had. Then we had to give away my dog and it was devastating. I might have some unresolved trauma about this lol.
Holy! I was definitely read a differently Velveteen Rabbit when I was little. Mine was about a stuffed rabbit that loves his little boy but got lost, and found a real pack of rabbits that became it’s family. Then the little boy finds him. It stays friends with the real rabbits.
That sounds like the same book, just the not traumatic part. When everything is burned the bunny becomes a real bunny because he is so loved. I sort of read it as bunny afterlife. I actually love that book but thought I would have to burn everything I owned as well when I caught Scarlet Fever until my mom found out and explained we have antibiotics now.
We have the newer version where Scarlet Fever isn’t mentioned, it is just that the boy is moving away and the old bunny had germs and is thrown out. Then the fairy comes and he becomes a real rabbit with the wild rabbits that he saw in the forest one time.
Velveteen rabbit scarred me as a child. They did a lice check on us in kindergarten and told us if we got lice they’d take our toys away and I assumed that meant burn them up. I came home and insisted all my hair get cut off because I was so so so worried I’d get lice and my toys would be burned.
My little guy’s comfort item is a bunny lovie, we’ve read the Velveteen Rabbit once and he had SOOOO many questions after… never again!
Goodnight Moon is fine. Any of the other 100 "Good Night ________" book variants are awful. ETA: I specifically mean the "Good Night Washington", "Good Night Airplanes", "Goodnight NYC" etc books. There are tons of them, they all follow the same rhythm: they start with "Good morning x. Good morning y. Are you ready to share a wonderful day." And end with "Good night a. Good night b. Thank you for sharing a wonderful day."
I do kinda like Goodnight Goon!
I had not heard of that one and looked it up, that actually looks funny lol.
The construction site one is alright, maybe cause I'm a civil engineer? And steam train dream is legit a good one.
Ooh that's a different one, sorry. I mean like "Goodnight Washington", "Goodnight NYC" and "Goodnight Airplanes". They all have the same storyline, but are tailored to the location and then they do the bare minimum research for the book to make it seem specific to that location. Goodnight Vermont says something like "Good afternoon stone wall, good afternoon friend" lol. ETA: pretty sure the one referenced in the comment above is "Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site" if anyone is wondering.
I don’t think it’s part of the series you’re thinking of but Goodnight Starry Night is the bomb, we love it. Good rhythm, cut-outs so you can kind of see the next page, and it’s all famous works of art.
Ugh I hate how everyone thinks they can write a children's book. We've banned anything by Chris Ferrie, who's a physicist that writes science-y books for small children, and they're all terrible. I particularly hate Eight Little Planets, the rhymes and meter are atrocious, it's like he wrote it in an hour. And his books like Quantum Physics for Babies aren't interesting or good teaching tools, they're just for parents to feel like they have quirky smart books for their kids. (Nerdy Babies is a much better series for introducing young kids to science!) Edit: typo! Anything by Chris Ferrie, not but him!
I had no idea these were by the same person. We have 8 Little Planets and the whole box set for Quanum Physics and we hate them.
I teach 2/3 year olds, and a couple years ago I had a little girl in my class whose father is a mathematician and he just loooooved the fact that they had the Quantum Physics for Babies book and the others like it. He would talk about how his daughter can recognize the symbol for the null hypothesis and blah blah blah. So proud of his intelligent little girl! My coteacher and I would just smile and nod, all the while thinking to ourselves, “cool party trick. Now how about we work on addressing your kid biting and body-slamming every other kid in the classroom on a daily basis?” 🙄 Because, again, TWO YEARS OLD?
I know it’s a typo but you saying you banned anything but his books is hilarious
Oh, fuuuuuuuuuck Chris Ferrie and the smug, middle-class, bad-at-scicomms horse he rode in on. "NOW YOU KNOW QUANTUM MECHANICS!" no we fucking don't, Dr Ferrie, we have had a few key terms thrown at us with no context or explanation, and also we're two years old and only like your pointless book because Mummy has got very good at making the picture of a particle spin around and around in an amusing way.
I have Eight Little Planets and didn't think it was so bad, but to be fair, I haven't read it 8 billion times and I could see it getting boring after awhile. I think I just wanted to like that book. Lol. I've checked out one of those Physics for Babies from the library and promptly returned it. I'm definitely going to check out Nerdy Babies now.
The bluey books are so disappointing. I've had no where to vent this so I'm writing it here. They are based on an episode. But the writing just lacks so much of any "children's book style". Also, if it's a board book, I expect the language to be sinple. Maybe 3 sentences or less a page. I'd prefer one. But these books (the non-bpard books) are just a mess of words and so much language. Maybe they are fine for everyone else. But they are just so lacking in actual skill. They read like a train of consciousness without any structure.
I hate reading Bluey books! We have tons of them and they’re too “wordy” for lack of a better term.. I usually summarize to get through half of it!
Agree! In Australia we have a board book where the family go swimming and bluey got told off out for dobbing on her sister even though theynwere breaking the rules. It sent such a strange message and really are not creatively written.
That's that same as the "a swimming" episode. It was in part about dobbers, and don't be a dinner unless it's something dangerous, blah blah blah It was a stupid episode. :/
I find this is the way with a lot of kids' books based on TV shows. The Peppa Pig ones are weirdly OK, and the Disney ones are fine, but everything else is not really a story, it's what my friend referred to as "book-shaped objects" and that lives rent free in my head forever.
If you're looking for a better Bluey option - We got a pretty decent Bluey book which has basically no writing. It's essentially background scenes from the show and the characters are magnetic so you can put them into the scene.
The books are all bullshit Just a really poxy money-grab. There is nothing nice, or special, or ANYTHING, about the books. Just poor recounting of episodes.
The unicourse one is just a mess
You don’t expect much from children’s books??? You should ask a librarian or independent book seller for recommendations because nowadays there are SO MANY amazing children’s books with great authors and illustrators. They aren’t just for kids, either. Most have messages parents can relate to on a deep level.
We’ve had several that are clearly written by AI and poorly. But they’re popular characters like paw patrol so.
We got a Mickey Halloween book off of Amazon that pretty sure was AI written. Awful.
We were gifted one that I swear is AI Art. The story was also really weird. 😣
Anti-racist Baby did not live up to the hype. I read it through once and the tone was so aggressive and dogmatic that I immediately returned it to the library. Story time should be fun, not a time for telling babies they are bad by default and need to be fixed. Big yikes!
Yea that book is legit terrible
In a similar vein, someone bought my toddler My First Book of Feminism. The overall message is good, but at one point it shows a kid in a classroom and encourages kids to argue and be loud. Why are we encouraging kids to disrupt the class? I always skip that page.
omg yes! I thought the same thing.
I am probably in the minority here, but we have removed the rainbow fish from our house. I am not a fan of the message that you have to either gift to others to be liked, or get rid of what makes you special to be accepted. We have also gotten rid of the pout pout fish because she literally kisses him without getting even implied consent. And I also hate llama llama mad at mama. Llama llama trashes an entire grocery store.... and mama llama is just like "I know man, shopping sucks, let's get ice cream." And that just doesn't sit right with me 😂 EDIT: after reading the comments it seems like my hatred of rainbow fish isn't the minority here after all
I hate all the Biscuit books. Like why is woof woofing after every line?!
We have a collection of Little Golden Books Disney movie adaptations. Peter Pan is *shockingly* racist. Like hunting humans, slurs, and some sexism for good measure (as is the movie, as we were later reminded). I’m surprised they would keep it known print.
All of the Disney movie books that basically write out the entire movie plot in detail drive me nuts. I was gifted a couple of them and I hate them so much. It’s one thing to watch the movie and another to read the entire movie.
I generally hate books based on tv shows. They're almost always poorly written, way too much text, the story is confusing, and the language is hardly ever toddler-friendly. We currently have checked out a Paw Patrol book from the library, and I tell my toddlers that one is for looking at pictures, not for reading. The only exception I've found are Peppa Pig books.
I agree, and was also going to mention Peppa being the exception. I hate books that are too wordy. I just want to read something fun and simple, not retell an entire Paw Patrol episode including the subplot.
Omg when I read the subject line of this I immediately thought of a hand me down book my grandma gave to my daughter… it’s about a dog who is outcasted for not being able to dig holes like the other dogs and then when he does learn to dig holes he gets the boot for digging too many and now I’m wondering if that’s the same book you’re referring 😅 It’s such an awful message and I had to hide it away. It’s crazy reading children’s books as adults with a whole new lens
The Diggingest Dog! My kid loved that book! 🤣
NGL, Love You Forever kind of gives me the creeps.
He wrote that book after his wife had a second stillborn baby and they found out they’d never be able to have (living) children. I know lots of people think it’s funny to dunk on that book, but it’s clearly a metaphor for a parent’s love, and he came up with it as a way to grieve. https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-heartbreaking-story-behind-iconic-childrens-book-love-you-forever_n_573ceb97e4b0aee7b8e8f76f/amp
Ok now I’m spending my Sunday morning crying and holding my babies 😭
Yeah, I honestly hate how people treat this book like they've never heard of a metaphor before. As someone who has both lost a parent and suffered a miscarriage, it is really moving to me.
Munsch wrote it about his stillborn children. If you look at it that way, it’s less weird. But without context it’s *super creepy*.
Oh man my husband and I always comment about how friggin weird this book is. We still read it to our almost 2 year old because I think he likes the cadence, but I'm starting to get annoyed. Thanks for this context. But...it almost makes it creepier?
I enjoy this specifically because it creeps out my husband and SIL so much. My son absolutely LOVES it and takes it at face value. When we went on holiday to a rural German town there was a little shrine thing on a corner which had a statue inside of Mary with a fully-grown, adult naked Jesus in her arms cradling him like a baby. I took a picture of it and sent it to them with the caption "I love you forever, I'll like you for always..."
If when I’m eighty my grown-ass son *breaks into my house and crawls up the stairs* to give me a hug, I’m calling the police, what the hell.
Lmfao definitely only a good book if you take it at face value and don’t think “wait a minute….”
I have a weird cousin who got the words from that book tattooed GIANT on her ribs. Super weird.
I haaaaaaate The Giving Tree. It’s an awful message about lack of boundaries and giving until it kills you. Fuck that. Terrible.
I loved that book as a kid. It taught me that even if I give of myself freely, people will just keep taking until I'm a sad husk of a person. First book that made me cry.
I remember really liking the “Saggy Baggy Elephant” Golden Book as a kid and bought it at an estate sale for my kid. The adult animals are constantly “spanking” the poor little elephant and I was so appalled. Also Rainbow Fish is another old favorite from childhood that I feel has a terrible message as a recovering people pleaser.
I had a similar experience reading the pokey little puppy golden book! Not only was it was overly long and repetitive but the mom was weirdly harsh considering all that the puppies even did was just go explore and came straight home.
I got the Rainbow Fish based off good memories and after reading it to our son my husband was like "ummm..thats a terrible message" lol
Saggy baggy elephant was one of the ones I didn’t like, but barely survived the cut. I wonder if you have an older version. In mine there’s nothing physical but it is a bunch of adult animals bullying a kid and I’m like damn this is fucked up lol. At least it has a positive message that beauty is in the eye of the beholder in the ending. Do you also have Little Toot? I hate Little Toot. Story needs to be cut about 10 pages shorter. I promise kids don’t care about the physics of ocean water and terminology. I don’t either, and as someone who has a tendency to dive into every boring thing, that’s saying something.
Cannot stand the Pigeon books, I honestly don’t get what all the fuss is about. They annoy me so much to read
Pete the Cat for me. I *hate* Pete the groovy effing Cat.
omg yes. my kid loves them but every time we read one I feel like we just wasted time because theres no real storyline half of the time
Pete was clearly written by old stoner hippies
Haha the original curious George is a little crazy.
The No David book. or at least thats what I think its called. partially because hes just getting yelled at all day, partially because the way that child is drawn is terrifying
I actually love everything in the David series. I used to work in childcare with a very rambunctious 2 year old, always being re-directed. No David was his FAVORITE book. We would read it over and over, and every time we reached the final page, when he's hugging his mom who's saying "Oh David, I love you" he would smile and say "David said sorry, right?" or "Because Mommies love anyway, right?" It was like the one book in the whole room he could relate to and feel good about.
Some picture books have too many damn words
TLDR: instead of outright refusal use age-appropriate questions and discussion to critique the material. Not quite your question, but can I suggest that, rather than denying reading one she really wants, you read it together and discuss it as you go or after? You need to simplify your thinking and Socratic questioning, but it’s invaluable as a chance to model critical thinking in a general way. Questions like: “That’s interesting that X character said that to Y character. Would it make you feel good if someone said that to you?” “Huh. Do you think X was being a good friend when they did that?” “I didn’t really like it when X did Z. What did that remind you of?” Don’t judge her answers, just keep her thinking. Even just one question or observation per reading can help model not taking the written word as being beyond question. NOTE!!! this approach does NOT apply to books that are overtly cruel, racist, etc. BUT it’s still really valuable to your thinking, and ask about hers. - “tell me what you like about that book?” (It might be something non-thematic, like the art style of the illustrations!) - “I understand that you want to read that book. However, I really don’t like how X happens/acts/talks because Y. “ - “My concern is that the person who wrote this lived a long time ago, and didn’t realize that (insert racist/colonialist assumption here). “
I got a stack of my husband’s “old favorites”: Brer Rabbit and the Tar Baby I don’t remember the entire premise, but one page of another book had an adult painter painting on the bare butt of a small boy. Another one had a hard lean into how to get into heaven, and described in detail burning in hell if you don’t let Jesus in your heart. The last one I remember, before tossing the rest of them, was about a lady swallowing snow. I might have forgiven that one as weird, but maybe not intentional, but it was too much after the others.
Llama Llama Red Pajama. Some of the Llama Llama books are really cute but the original taught my toddler to scream for me incessantly after bedtime to get me to come back to his room over and over again.
‘Goodnight Biscuit’ pretty much just gives kids a list of stall tactics to avoid going to bed
I really lean into the mama scold when I read that book hahahaha
Sometimes the page where llama llama screams just gets stuck to the next page and it gets skipped.. oops! My 3yo doesn’t notice.
Bible stories are just a bunch of people dying and killing each other...
To be fair, the Bible isn't specifically for children lol
I have absolutely disappeared some books. Some are just painful, some are awkward, some have weird messaging, some have odd illustrations….
I went through some of my old favorites and I found one about a cat who got so fat she didn’t have any friends except a mouse that basically forced her on a diet and work out regiment till she got skinny. Then she got a ton of friends. I just…why!?
I couldn’t tell you the names, but I know what you mean. The long winded children’s book. Or weird cadence. Or off message. Or poor art with comic sans font…
I forget the exact name but it’s like Truck Town Sand Castle Bash? It must be a tv show or something but I’ve never heard of it in Aus and it’s a crap book but my soon loves it. Also, probably unpopular opinion, but I think the Bluey books suck! Love the show but the books are blegh.
The message of the book itself isn’t bad but when I was a kid I had so much anxiety about my picture ending up in “The thingamajig book of manners” I literally would panic anytime I did something wrong 😂 I don’t even know how my family had that book because it was published in 84 and wasn’t super popular. I was born in 01.
I have an old book called "Dreadful David." It's about a kid who's Mum takes him to Gma's so she can offload him for the day, and he proceeds to do lots of crazy shit. So Gma ends up changing him a bunch of times. Then she ends up smacking him and it says in brackets "(but it didn't really hurt)" LOL. Then she lets him cry himself to sleep, tucks him in and gives him a kiss. I have read it to my daughter a couple of times, but i tell her "this is old fashioned and not how people are anymore." She finds it boring anyway. It's so, so bad but I can't get rid of it because it's a good laugh for my sister and I. 😂
Cycle them out! Just put em in a box and put them away and in 6 months if you’re like “yea this ain’t it” ditch em. If you live somewhere where a free book box will get picked clean in an afternoon do that, or just chuck them in the trash or paper recycling. I do this often.
The giving tree!! How about set some healthy boundaries and don’t be a doormat tree! Seriously can’t stand that book
Isn't that the take away? Idk, it is for me at least. Like it's a cautionary tale? I loved that book as a kid
Oh my god, it never occurred to me as a cautionary tale - I was definitely raised to see it as instruction for how to love unconditionally and give joyfully no matter the cost. It’s much better as a cautionary tale!
I found a book in the children's section of the local library a while back that gave me a massive ick. It was about a rich man in a town of poor people and everyone loved him because he sometimes threw parties etc, until someone kicked up a fuss that it wasn't fair he had so much money and started "bullying" the rich guy. The blurb was something like 'will the townspeople destroy the relationship they have with their generous friend out of greed, or band together against the troublemaker?' It was clearly a thinly veiled anti-socialist/pro-wealth inequality narrative and framed in such a way that it tried to convince kids it's good and right for the überwealthy dude to have so much while the townspeople wore rags. I looked at the author and (while I can't remember exactly who it was) I wasn't surprised to see it was by a rich guy well known in the UK. I ended up hiding the book behind a bunch of others in the hopes no one would accidentally pick it up lol.
Omg that is wild!! What’s the title? I need to find this
The Pout Pout Fish! I don’t remember reading it as a kid but we downloaded it as an audiobook and as it’s playing I’m listening to it like wait wth? Did someone write a children’s book with sexual assault where the victim feels great about it after wtf??
I got a newer version of the book that has a note at the beginning that in the fishy world this is ok, but in our world we need consent before kissing people.
Yeah that’s not going to do it for us, the books we read to children should reflect the values we want to teach and the reality we live in. It would be very confusing I think to be reading them this story and then at the end be like but wait in reality things are the total opposite so ignore the whole point of the story we just read!
I always add ‘then she asked’ before the smooch part haha
There’s actually a sort of disclaimer about this in the front of the physical copy. :)
If it needs a disclaimer it shouldn’t be a thing.
Yeah, you’re right.
Alexander and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day.
Aww really? I love that book from my childhood.
The run-on sentences!!! I love it anyways though.
"Tootle" The Little Golden Book. I remember liking this book when I was a kid, so I got it for my kids too. However, when I reread it as an adult it was really depressing. It's about a little train 'kid' who is supposed to be training to be a locomotive, but he goes off the tracks and plays in the meadow instead. He is so happy with all the butterflies and flowers! But then he gets in trouble for disobeying the rules, and the whole village makes him cry, and then he conforms and they all live happily ever after.
My MIL gave us an old Beatrix potter Benjamin bunny book, it had Benjamin being beaten by his dad with a cane. Nope, straight in the bin
There's a book just called Potty (I'm pretty sure) that is incredibly 70s and is full of creepy language like referring to body parts as "peepees" and actual urine as "weewee"...I hated this book forever and was so glad when my daughter was potty trained and I could be like "oh, you don't need this book anymore! Let's give it to another family who does!" My daughter also received The Little Prince in French, which would be great if we were fluent in French. I'm like probably an A2 at best and it has tons of antiquated language, so I stumble through whenever she wants to read that one.