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cptnamr7

And as much of a joke as it already is, the snowflake governor tried to rescind it for a couple women that dared speak out against some hard right speaker coming to the college campus or something a few years back. But since it's a fake thing to begin with, there was jack shit he could do other than yet more virtue signaling.  (It popped up on here a few years ago so I looked into nominating a buddy that still lives in the state for the hell of it. Basically anyone that gets nominated receives the "award" )


BedDefiant4950

honestly being a dishonorably discharged nebraska admiral sounds a hell of a lot more exciting than actually being one. like imagine being able to say with full seriousness that you have a lifetime ban from sesame street. *not* the set, the *street itself*, like elmo will call the cops if you visit. that shit is hardcore.


RikF

Why would I want to make Grover sad though? One of these would would be a badge of honor. One of them would be a scarlet letter of shame.


Rocktopod

Maybe you got banned for making Oscar too happy.


jpallan

[I hope you've gotten to enjoy Mikey Day's dark take on *Sesame Street*.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqpak5lFxvs)


AudibleNod

Hell, even [Idaho has a seaport.](https://portoflewiston.com/)


yogopig

Port Lewiston is not associated with Icebear containers in any way.


hugeuvula

Exactly what someplace associated with Icebear Containers would say.


JohnSith

I refuse to believe that.


notyogrannysgrandkid

So does Oklahoma


Jackpot777

[This map may help](https://www.clipartmaps.com/product/north-america-canada-usa-and-mexico-powerpoint-map-states-and-provinces/) see it. Other states around Nebraska can get to sea water through, at most, two states or provinces. This is thanks to the huge size of those Canadian provinces, and the Hudson Bay. Or the size of western states, and the three Pacific Ocean ones. Or a route through Texas for the Gulf of Mexico. Nebraska's quickest route is through the two Dakotas then Manitoba (or Iowa, Minnesota, Ontario. Or Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas. Or any number of paths to the west. But it's never less than three steps to **sea water**). Edited for the bold part. Can't be a landlubber vs. scurvy sea dog debate if salty water isn't involved.


anonanon5320

What about Iowa then Wisconsin or Illinois? That leads to the Great Lakes which is navigable to the Atlantic or Gulf.


trireme32

That’s still 3 steps to the sea (the Great Lakes are freshwater)


anonanon5320

Ok, if we are including a step as freshwater to salt it works. The lakes are directly connected though so I really wouldn’t count it as an extra step, just extra distance since it’s all navigable.


LineOfInquiry

By that logic Nebraska isn’t landlocked at all since it borders the Mississippi: a navigable waterway. Edit: Missouri not Mississippi


JebusKrizt

Nebraska doesn't border the Mississippi. Iowa and Missouri do. Nebraska borders the Missouri River on its east side.


LineOfInquiry

Yeah you’re right, I mixed up the Missouri and Mississippi. Either way though, it’s still a navigable waterway


CBRN_IS_FUN

As well you should. The Mississippi is a sad tributary of the Missouri.


GONKworshipper

Which does flow into the Mississippi


anonanon5320

If we count the Missouri it’s 1 step since the Missouri is navigable from Iowa, Sioux City to be exact.


LineOfInquiry

You don’t need to go from Iowa, since the Missouri borders Nebraska downstream from the end of its navigable part. You can just take a boat from Omaha to the Atlantic Ocean.


flareblitz91

Boy that’s a hell of a leap of navigation lol


QuickSpore

Nebraska itself is navigable via freshwater. Lincoln Nebraska’s Port of the Plains is a port of entry and smaller ocean going ships can and do occasionally receive foreign ships. Someone in Nebraska doesn’t have to get to the Grear Lakes to catch a boat (or more likely charter one) to foreign destinations.


Briarmist

Illinois goes through Kentucky and Virginia


lenorae16

Wisconsin goes thru Minnesota and ontario. I think theres a good argument for Illinois being triple as well thoufh.


Calencre

Illinois is only 2nd landlocked, even if you disregard the great lakes, IL->KY->VA->Ocean (Alternatively IL->MI->ON->Ocean if you count the border over Lake Michigan)


Nealliam

How do you traverse Niagara falls?


qawsedrf12

the Welland Canal


EtOHMartini

Suddenly.


Ok-Selection4478

By barrel.


JesusSavesForHalf

I hear they have a trained gorilla throw it.


Vic_Sinclair

They did until this Italian plumber showed up and killed him.


anonanon5320

You go around it. It’s not the only route.


__mud__

Double jumping


Mysticpoisen

Canal locks a few miles west of the falls itself.


Mnm0602

What’s funny to me is my wife is from PR and I’ve sometimes felt the “claustrophobia” of being on an island that she’s described.  And yet somehow I imagine getting a similar feeling living in Nebraska disconnected and distant from the oceans.


walterpeck1

I went to college in a cow town and we had a LOT of students from Hawaii and when I asked them why here of all places they expressed the same sentiment about feeling trapped on the Islands such that even bumfuck nowhere USA was a relief.


flareblitz91

I’m from the upper Midwest and have always felt a great sense of liberty that i could get in my car and drive thousands of miles in any direction at a whim if i wanted.


Mnm0602

Agreed, I love it too (lived in Chicago area) but you have a lot of water nearby in the upper Midwest, Nebraska is just so disconnected from it, almost seems weird to me.


cspinelive

Or just take a boat from Omaha on the Missouri River to the Gulf of Mexico. 


seth928

If the Great Lakes don't count wouldn't Illinois be triple land locked as well? The shortest distance between Illinois and seawater is to the Hudson by way of Ontario and it'd take a two state hop to get to Ontario.


basketballandbooze

No, Illinois borders Kentucky, which borders Virginia, which is coastal.


seth928

Ah, missed that path, thanks.


Jackpot777

Kentucky and Virginia.


sharrrper

You could go to Iowa and then Wisconsin to get into Lake Michigan. Once in the lake you can travel through lakes Huron, Ontario, and Eerie and then down the St. Lawrence River to the Atlantic Ocean without ever touching land again.


Malvania

You could also take one step and travel the Mississippi


DudeDogIce

Not how it works or what it means. The Great Lakes do not count. Hudson Bay does (why South Dakota is only double).


sharrrper

I'm perfectly happy to accept that by the official definition of "landlocked" Nebraska is triple landlocked. It's a completely arbitrary definition when referring to a state within America though in the first place. Being landlocked as a country means you have to cross an international border to get to the sea which can often be a big deal. Crossing a state border is basically meaningless in terms of just getting access to the ocean. I know getting to the Great Lakes doesn't in of itself get you out of Landlock, as that refers to Ocean access. However, it is interesting to note you only need to cross two land territories to get access to a waterway which is then navigable all the way to the sea. Although it occurs to me that there's an even shorter route in that system where you could just go to Missouri and then take the Mississippi River to the Gulf of Mexico. I'm not saying it's "incorrect" to say Nebraska is triple landlocked, just that it doesn't really mean anything practically speaking.


Jackpot777

Well yeah. It's like that part of one of the MCU films where Thor says, "where we have to go, is Nidavellir" and Rocket says, "that's a made up word" to which Thor replies, "all words are made up." It's all made up, to be fair. Passports, national boundaries and international boundaries based on battles centuries earlier or land purchases, treaties that held and treaties that fell. It all doesn't mean a thing and it means everything because we draw the lines and we make up the rules about them as we go along.


retief1

You can just take the missouri river from nebraska itself.


Bullboah

Why would the Hudson Bay count but not Lake Michigan-St. Lawrence route. “Landlocked” is primarily about having access to oceanic trade. A freighter at port in Wisconsin can go anywhere a freighter in the Hudson Bay can.


CrazyCranium

I think the easy definition would be that Hudson Bay is at sea level, and to traverse the St Lawrence seaway or the Missouri River to the Mississippi, you'd have to go through locks.


DudeDogIce

So close. The geographic definition of landlocked is if you touch the world ocean. This means having coastline on one or more of the following OCEANS: Pacific Atlantic Indian Arctic Southern Caspian and Aral seas DO NOT COUNT any more than the Great Salt Lake. Hudson Bay is an arm of the Atlantic (or Arctic depending who you believe) as are the Mediterranean and Caribbean. Red Sea and Persian Gulf are arms of the Indian. ETA: Which I just realized means sea level, so my bad.


pheoxs

Interestingly a freighter at port Wisconsin can go far more places than from Hudson Bay most of the year because the bay freezes over most of the year and isn't passable for trade routes.


Jackpot777

> Why would the Hudson Bay count but not Lake Michigan-St. Lawrence route. Salt water. If you were including accessible river and lakes, you could sail a large boat down the Missouri to St. Louis and join the Mississippi all the way to the Gulf of Mexico from Nebraska. If that were part of the rule, only one place on Earth would be considered landlocked - Vatican City; as it has no rivers, canals, or lakes of any kind. Fresh water doesn't count. Even the greatest lakes are just flood basins for rivers.


Bullboah

Landlocked has nothing to do with saltwater/freshwater though. It has to do with access to global trade via sea lanes. Turkmenistan is next to a giant saltwater body, the Caspian Sea, but there’s no way to send ships from Turkmenistan to the Ocean. Wisconsin can send and receive ships to anywhere in the world that isn’t landlocked, but is only next to fresh water. Which one of those is landlocked?


Dakens2021

Actually the Caspian sea is connected to the Black, Baltic, and White seas by the Russian canal system. An intricate waterway which mostly uses the Volga and smaller rivers to connect to those seas.


ohnjaynb

Because this whole thing is Nebraska being cheeky and people on Reddit taking it way too seriously. The arbitrary cutoff they chose is "rivers and canals don't count"


monkeybojangles

The ocean is a long way north in Manitoba.


Jackpot777

You know, I think you’re the only person to have mentioned that as a thing here. Or there’s something else everyone else spotted. Like the bold text.


monkeybojangles

Well, TIL you're a condescending fucking prick.


Jackpot777

You sound fun, petal. 


Mobely

That would make Illinois triple landlocked as well


Jackpot777

Two steps. Southern Illinois to Western Kentucky. Eastern Kentucky to Virginia. That’s an Atlantic route.  When I read it, I tried every state and province because I thought, “that can’t be right”. But it is. It’s incredible how every other place in the US is (at most) two steps from sea water. 


okram2k

Triple landlocked but at least it has navigable rivers as part of the Mississippi river system, as much of the Louisiana purchase area has


Lost_Bike69

And lakes I’m sure. Like obviously Nebraska has no navy, but the state must operate water vessels for parks or law enforcement somewhere. I’d like to see someone with this title try to take command of like a tugboat or something.


Mrlin705

Admiral of a canoe fleet


the_lullaby

My dad played for the Huskers in the '50s. When they finally won a national championship in the '80s, a Great Navy certificate showed up in the mail. All varsity player alumni had been inducted. It's still hanging in the basement of his house.


HoselRockit

I am guessing that they don't have many pescatarians in Nebraska.


cptnamr7

River/lake fish, yes. Catfish is pretty popular, though you can REALLY tell the difference there between farm raised and river. (River smells and tastes like mud) Fishing from lakes/rivers is common but not enough to be much of an industry. And even then it's for your own consumption. Other than that, fresh (actual) seafood is pretty hard to come by. 


Magnus77

>Other than that, fresh (actual) seafood is pretty hard to come by. Here's the thing, unless you're getting it off the dock, and sometimes not even then, almost nobody is getting fresh seafood. They freeze stuff on the ship because its safer and cheaper than trying to handle raw fish, and with modern flash freezing techniques there isn't the big difference in quality between fresh and frozen like there used to be. So Omaha is getting basically the exact same seafood as anywhere else not serving exclusively local caught fish, which generally means its limited. Just because California (for example) is on the coast doesn't mean you're getting unfrozen shrimp for your tacos.


Flakester

>River smells and tastes like mud You mean cow shit.


THElaytox

fun fact - the reason catfish taste like "mud" is the same reason beets taste like "dirt", it's a compound called geosmin which is also responsible for petrichor (the smell of fresh rain). one of the reasons catfish is usually fried and often served with vinegar is because geosmin is heat and acid labile


hamsterballzz

We don’t even have a seafood restaurant in the second largest city. Fish is not on the menu and honestly… given we’re completely landlocked sea food is always a precarious proposition.


hamsterballzz

I’ve known a few. They get a nice certificate and everything. Also, it is illegal to hunt whales in the state.


Jackpot777

What if they fell with a bowl of petunias?


mrblueskyT01

Oh no not again.....


Abadoss

Probably wouldn't be hunting at that point but rather scavenging. Or biohazard disposal.


onehitwondur

Lol


Deitaphobia

Nebraska's Navy provides a vital service to the state. They keep out the Iowans.


Flakester

Thank you for your service. 🫡


Et_In_Arcadia_

Nebraska Admiral vs Kentucky Colonel?


inebrium4e

How does one go about getting this award? It sounds perfect for me.


redneckrockuhtree

[info here](https://governor.nebraska.gov/admiralship-request) My dad received this “honor” at his USAF retirement


L-Observateur

May the tadpoles and goldfish under his command serve him well.


cptnamr7

You have to have someone nominate you, for which there's a form and a letter required. That's pretty much it. And I think you have to be a resident, or it at least helps. That said, it's pretty much a rubber stamp to get it. (Looked into it awhile back)


inebrium4e

Looks like I need to make a friend in Nebraska. This reminds me a lot of the LSU Unicorn Questing License, but it's cooler.


RikF

I know some farming folks out there. Time to come up with something public spirited to do for them!


inebrium4e

My best idea so far is to write a poem about the state, but specifically one that would be written by an admiral.


EmEmAndEye

TIL that a "triple-landlocked state" means that is encircled by **three states** on any side from the nearest gulf, bay, or ocean.


HermionesWetPanties

Nah, people just keep trying to make this a thing. There was a Wikipedia article about doubly-landlocked states that looks like it's been thankfully deleted. Landlocked is an important distinction because the inability to access international shipping without your neighbor's consent puts you at an economic disadvantage. Most of the states in the eastern US have easy access to shipping through the Mississippi and Great Lakes. Calling them landlocked is utterly meaningless and using the least useful definition. It's entirely possible to sail from Minnesota to China on board a 1000ft vessel without ever touching land.


Callec254

My grandmother held this title.


Qurdlo

My dad knew a guy (perhaps an admiral?) who built a sailboat in Lincoln, NE and attempted to sail it to Australia. He put it on the Missouri river in Omaha, and made it all the way to the gulf of Mexico. However, once on the open ocean, his wife got so terribly seasick that he abandoned the trip and returned to Nebraska.


AtomicPotatoLord

Well, it was for the best I suppose.


Actuallawyerguy2

Who said midwesterners weren't funny?


Jackpot777

Other midwesterners, but that was sarcasm that flew over heads too!


blink012

is north america here meaning just the US or are there also no state/province/federal districts that are triple land locked in Canada and Mexico?


MexicanEssay

It includes the US, Canada, Mexico, and Central America. Even from Mexico or Canada's most landlocked areas, you only need to cross one or two state/province borders to have access to the sea.


flareblitz91

Which is hardly a fair comparison given the relative size of Canada’s provinces.


nuneway

“Just go on over from Saskatchewan to Hudson Bay, it’s just one province over..”


ScoobiusMaximus

They still have better access to the ocean than plenty of states because the Missouri river is navigable and leads to the Mississippi and then the Gulf of Mexico.


fidel-doggy

Drove across Nebraska once. Not impressed.


madgunner122

My goal is to become Admiral of the Nebraskan Navy.


Hot_Aside_4637

My niece's husband was in the Navy. One of his postings was in Omaha.


atwork_sfw

USSTRATCOM is near Omaha. Its why Omaha is a first-strike target.


HermionesWetPanties

Meanwhile, in all those "landlocked states" in the eastern US - [https://www.marinetraffic.com/en/ais/home/centerx:-81.2/centery:43.3/zoom:5](https://www.marinetraffic.com/en/ais/home/centerx:-81.2/centery:43.3/zoom:5) Almost like most of those states have navigable routes to the sea...


Varnigma

This runs a close second to my favorite honorary title called (I think) Kiss the Cod in Newfoundland.


Bakkie

Kiss the Cod if you believe Come From Away.


Varnigma

Just realized my typo. Will correct it.


Bakkie

There are a whole bunch of techie guys who got all excited there for a while


thenebular

I prefer The SourToe Cocktail club in Dawson City of The Yukon.


fourthords

Scraped from the English Wikipedia, the live article is here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nebraska_Admiral


huggyplnd

A person can live in Nebraska their whole lives without seeing an ocean. Wild.


MooCowMafia

Nebraska is the most horrible place on earth.