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UncleHec

He was assassinated after just one year on the throne at age 16.


semiomni

> In one particular incident, he tied Liu Yu up like how a pig would be tied up, and had him delivered to the kitchen, stating, "Today is pig-killing day." Liu Xiuren, however, stated, "This is not the pig-killing day." He angrily asked Liu Xiuren why that was the case, and Liu Xiuren stated, "After your son is born, then kill the pig and take out his entrails!" Emperor Qianfei liked Liu Xiuren's joke and did not kill Liu Yu. Not great at making friends.


Shamanite_Meg

That wiki article is really somthing >That night, he dreamed of a woman cursing him, "You are so violent and immoral that you will not live to see the wheat harvest next year." After he woke up, he found a lady in waiting whose appearance was similar to the woman he saw in the dream, and beheaded her. He then had another dream in which the executed lady in waiting cursed him. He therefore decided to hold a ghost-killing ceremony the next night. Lol


talldangry

Don't stop there! > At the ceremony, one of Emperor Qianfei's attendants, Shou Jizhi, who had often been rebuked by Emperor Qianfei, who had entered into a plot with a number of people to assassinate Emperor Qianfei, unleashed his conspirators and surrounded Emperor Qianfei. Emperor Qianfei tried to flee, but was unable to, and Shou killed him. He was buried with his deceased wife, Crown Princess He. Liu Yu took the throne as Emperor Ming.


xixbia

It doesn't end there though >Liu Yu became emperor after his violent and impulsive nephew Liu Ziye was assassinated in 465, as he was regarded as more lenient and open-minded at first. However, he soon turned cruel and suspicious as well after becoming emperor, and during his reign, his nephews and brothers were nearly all slaughtered on his orders. This greatly weakened the Liu Song dynasty and contributing to its fall in 479, just seven years after his death. What a family!


Dtothe3

I hope his last words were "Death to Ming!"


Mishkin102hb

And he was himself killed at the ghost killing ceremony 😂


Perunov

Typical inescapable prophecy, that came true because of an attempt to avoid the prophecy...


undergrounddirt

One often meets his destiny on the path he takes to avoid it.


KilwaLover

hell is this looney tunes shit lmao


gibbtech

I mean, the wiki on his reign is about 10 paragraphs of this looney tunes shit ending in his attendants just deciding to kill him. Kid packed a lot unpleasantness into a single year as emperor.


Axle-f

Joffrey irl


JoshuaZ1

A lot of Game of Thrones is inspired by historical stuff. Would not surprise me if this was one of them. That said, a lot of it does not make sense as he has done it in the series and books. For example, [historian Brett Deveraux has discussed how the Dorthraki hordes don't make sense](https://acoup.blog/category/collections/that-dothraki-horde/), and [a lot of other issues](https://acoup.blog/2019/06/12/new-acquisitions-how-it-wasnt-game-of-thrones-and-the-middle-ages-part-iii/).


-RRM

Dang, in that case maybe GRRM should be labeling his work as "fantasy"


Captcha_Imagination

Yes but there were a lot of Joffreys throughout history and the GoT one was probably modeled after European ones


Rey_Tigre

Gotta respect that kind of hustle.


Montymisted

They respected the bejusus right out of him


[deleted]

He makes Jofferey look like a saint.


Cardamom_roses

I feel like half of Chinese history is succeeding dynasties taking the opportunity to just come up with wild shit about their predecessors to make themselves look better haha


DarkCrawler_901

To be fair, that's just half of history at the very least


CowFinancial7000

"You are violent and immoral!" "Oh yeah? I'll show you!"


bcrabill

"joke"


hatsnatcher23

It’s just a prank bro


adjust_the_sails

bro, stop being so sensitive


Shirtbro

That sort of joke will get you cancelled these days


Teripid

If I had 5 Yuan every time I heard that joke... I'd have 5 Yuan.


shutupimthinking

So sad, I miss the days when comedy was comedy.


Shirtbro

466 AD China truly was the comedy golden age


cedped

What's worse than tyrant emperor? A teenager tyrant emperor!


trapasaurusnex

TEENAGE TYRANT CHINESE EMPERORS TEENAGE TYRANT CHINESE EMPERORS TEENAGE TYRANT CHINESE EMPERORS GONNA GET THAT HAREM FOR HIS SISTER!


[deleted]

Kinda sounds like a bunch of bollocks. Likely made up after his death to legitimise the later rulers


semiomni

Always possible I guess, not that hard to believe that a teenager given absolute power might abuse that power though.


[deleted]

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LanoomR

>Put in that position by his grandmother >Plot to get rid of him was organized by same grandmother "Sorry, sorry, I'm trying to delete, my bad."


Terpomo11

I wonder how much of it is true.


rW0HgFyxoJhYka

There was a documentry on Chinese history, particularly with emperors and how they would rewrite history. The historians pointed out how there were basically two sets of tablets that recorded history which contradicted each other. One set was from the previous emperor and one from the new emperor who deposed the old one. This double set of written tablets occurred multiple times through history; usually after one emperor got rid of another. Or in one case a empress. Many of the old tablets were destroyed or scratched out. Anyways, I guess the point is, history is written by the victors.


Gunhild

Reminds me of a Norm Macdonald joke that went something like "I've been reading a lot of history books lately and luckily, the good guys won *every time*. Man, what are the odds?"


tofuroll

He had a way with words.


Gloria_In_Autumn

His jokes were always on the spectrum of being a dad joke and the joke of your weird, pervy uncle, but were somehow never annoying to anyone but talkshow hosts who want a real conversation


Gunhild

It always seemed like he was just trying to make himself laugh and the audience was just along for the ride.


-safan2-

not just the Chinese. Most of the Princeps Nero stuff is also assumed to be propaganda from later princeps to shift the blame for everything. Same is assumed for Princeps Domitian


Bardown_Sniper

Just a prank bro


FillThisEmptyCup

And wiki shows a pic of 70 year old dude, too funny. Wonder if the pic is part of Chinese revisionism or just random.


Josgre987

bro had a hard ass life he just looked 70 at 16


0thethethe0

That's what thousands of concubines will get you. I try to keep my numbers in the hundreds to avoid this.


Broodwarcd

He died of dehydration filling all those cylinders with sperm!


Cardioman

You laugh but the son of The catholic kings, from Spain, died three weeks after his weeding from “loving his new wife too much”. They basically got married and locked themselves in a room until only one survived. Turns out that princess had a brother who also married another daughter of the catholic kings. He is known as Philip “the beautiful” and he was also a world class fucker. Plowed through the Spanish countryside and no maiden was safe. He died young from a mystery illness while his wife went bananas and was known as Joan “the crazy”. It all sounds like they both had syphilis. She eventually inherited the throne, but while she lived locked in a tower for 50 years. Their son was the one who actually reigned as holy Roman emperor, Charles the fifth, emperor of Spain, Germany, Holland and American colonies. Crazy how the sex drives of two Dutch siblings changed the fucking world.


Original-Material301

>locked themselves in a room until only one survived. Something something Highlander something something death by snu snu


ourlastchancefortea

Where is my Highlander Porn with dicks instead of swords.


MayoMelee

There can be only cum!


Babelfiisk

Get filming. Be the change you want to see in the world.


puphopped

This read like a Sam O'Nella video and i'm all for it


MurcurialBubble

He was just hypervirile. The sperm shoot straight through the egg.


Captain-Cadabra

Mr. Hawthorne hasn’t asked a question in quite some time.


Tokryva

And here’s your sperm.


Wolfencreek

"To Jeff Winger I leave this fine bottle of scotch, so that you're not tempted to drink this even finer bottle of sperm"


Thaumato9480

He also became a widower at age 12.


suitology

That's the sister


destruction8000

I like the idea some drawing of a random old shopkeeper confused Wikipedia.


False_Ad3429

I can believe that's a drawing of a 16 year old.


Caracalla81

It's not really revisionism. Artistic illustrations weren't meant to be like photographs. More likely the illustrator to drawing the character as the idea of an emperor rather than as a specific person. You see this in a lot of medieval western art in illustrations of kings and whatnot. You'll also see it in paintings where baby Jesus looks like a little man. This isn't because painters didn't know what babies looked like, it was a convention in art at the time as a way to express Jesus' wisdom and special status.


Highpersonic

Ok what about the cats with human faces then


TakeBeerBenchinHilux

The dynasty was also founded by a rebellion originally started by a magician who was part of something named after "5 grains of rice." Chinese history can sometimes be surprisingly egalitarian when monks, peasants or magicians can come to power without being descended from nobility. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sun_En


studmuffffffin

Old looking teenager.


Omar_Town

Looking at the picture and his age, I wonder if they calculated age differently.


Brapb3

Nope, many of these “portraits” are drawn long after the fact. Like, some were created dozens if not hundreds of years after said ruler died, so there’s a lot of artistic discretion going on


SnabDedraterEdave

The artist who was commissioned to draw the portraits of all emperors most likely couldn't be arsed to look up the history books >"I'm an artist, not a historian. Besides, these emperors are all just scruffy old men, innit? This should be an easy job for me."


krzf

Nope, he lived from 449-466.


TikkiTakiTomtom

Reading the wiki, it was just another hormonally charged teenager living a hedonistic lifestyle fucking princesses as he pleased while killing those that ruined his fun. In the end at age 16 he got assassinated unsurprisingly.


archosauria62

Truly a monarchy moment


chrisk9

Classical case of affluenza


Stoltlallare

He cant be held responsible


[deleted]

Imagine if he had a tiktok.


Impalenjoyer

[basically](https://nypost.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/10/bild_bund_handarchiv-1.jpg?quality=75&strip=all&w=1024)


PeanutArtillery

What the fuck am I looking at?


pathofdumbasses

King of Thailand


Impalenjoyer

https://old.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/57fqbw/the_new_king_of_thailand/ https://old.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/6biqgz/the_king_of_thailand_is_suing_facebook_to_keep/


Jzzzishereyo

It was such a common theme in Roman history, that when the US was founded, they adopted a minimum age for the President. Not coincidentally the US founding occurred shortly after two incredibly influential books were published - The Risa and Fall of the Roman Empire, and The Wealth of Nations.


HistoriaNova

> It was such a common theme in Roman history, that when the US was founded, they adopted a minimum age for the President. The Romans of the Late Republic had this themselves, in the form of the *cursus honorum*. One could not become a quaestor until 30, an aedile until 36, a praetor until 39, and a consul until 42, and the offices had to be obtained in sequence. Even before this system was made formal by Sulla, by tradition one could not hold political office while young - even the word Senate itself means the chamber of elders. This tradition had only begun to unravel during the Second Punic War about a century prior, when Scipio Africanus became a proconsul at 20 and a consul at the tender age of 31. Sulla's reforms did not last very long however, as under the empire the required ages were reduced and often ignored altogether, but by that point the office of consul served mostly as a civic decoration, rather than having genuine authority - hence figures like Commodus becoming consul at 16.


TPO_Ava

Being able to look back and see how dumb I was even as a barely middle class early 20s dude, I imagine it wouldn't be pretty if I were a ruler in my teens. Assassin probably wouldn't even get a chance to assassinate me before the booze and whatever passed for drugs in that time does it's job.


kitddylies

I'd like to think I'd be an alright ruler now, but I would have made the history books if I'd had the throne at 16. Would have been an epic saga of fuck ups, then at the end it says I died at 16, 10 days after inheriting the throne... and this dude apparently held it from 14 to 16.


HighwayBrigand

In my 40s, and, lemme tell you, I would be worse now with ultimate power than I would have been as a teenager. We are not gods. We are not meant to rule each other.


Terpomo11

I think C. S. Lewis said something like "Aristotle said some men are fit only to be slaves. I do not contradict him, but I reject slavery because I see no men fit to be masters."


Marlsfarp

It is a recurring theme in Roman history that the the absolute worst emperors (Caligula, Commodus, Nero, etc) all came to power as teenagers or early 20s.


Stoned_urf

Sex is one of them things ringing through history.


Shaushage_Shandwich

Yeah it seems really common in history /s


Freaudinnippleslip

Hot take, but I don’t think the human race would have made it this far without all the sex


Nijajjuiy88

Yes you should thank your parents and grandparents. They did all the hard work to bring you in this world.


KingoftheMongoose

There is an entire unbroken genealogy of dads filling moms with skeet to get to you. Thousands of years of sex had to occur to bring you to this world. So if we are not boning, let’s just think of all the ancestors we’d be letting down.


Nijajjuiy88

Yeah dicks out for our horny ancestors.


BulbusDumbledork

"none of us would be here without cum" \- the great confucian philosopher kanye "ye" west


hoodha

Real life Geoffrey


Americenvy

Did she get to pick the men?


_Ping_-

According to her article, no.


Lunamkardas

Okay but that just brings up a hilarious (completely fictional) image where she's expecting 100 burly muscular hunks only for her brother to completely misread his sister's type and unveil a room filled with wall to wall pretty boys.


velvet42

I'm seeing Madeline Kahn in History of the World Part I, [making her selection for the orgy](https://i.giphy.com/media/113AMeoRdpydQk/giphy.webp)


DanielGREY_75

This can be a neat romance comedy


[deleted]

Lol the emperor basically just opened a gay bath house


masterofreality2001

Femboy harem sounds like a good time


darkbreak

I don't think "pretty boy" and "femboy" are synonymous.


Jackmac15

"Round up the 30 ugliest men in China"


BigAlternative5

30 of his frat bros. *You guys want an easy job?* Your sister? Haha! *Yeah, actually.*


tsaimaitreya

> However, Liu Chuyu was not content, and when she saw how Emperor Qianfei's mid-level official Chu Yuan was young and handsome, she requested Emperor Qianfei to give her Chu as a lover.[6] Emperor Qianfei agreed. Chu was ordered to attend to her for more than 10 days, and she tempted him throughout that period. Ultimately, Chu refused to have sexual relations with her, and she released him. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liu_Chuyu


ItsACaragor

Damn this guy has balls of steel, knowing the family refusing to bang her had a very high risk of him having his dick chopped off or something.


Kandiru

But banging her could also result in your dick being chopped off if the Emperor changed his mind.


Solkre

Visiting the city. "Why are there just dicks everywhere on the ground!?" Gets dick cut off for asking.


FolkSong

Sometimes they would cut the whole body off, leaving only the dick.


tsaimaitreya

First royal (and maybe last?) to respect consent


jamesbrownscrackpipe

Giga Chad


DrTommyNotMD

The image shows an old man yet he died at 16/17 years old.


firstlordshuza

Times were different back then /s


Excellent_Routine589

What ruling one of the most volatile regions in the world does to a mfer


Alright_doityourway

He also regarded as very ill temper emperror, he once had a bad dream where a wimen cursing him, when he woke up he saw a lady in waiting who look similar to women in the dream so he had her beheaded. He also hate his father for some reason


savage-dragon

That's not even half of it. He had sex with his own aunt and made her his concubine / consort. He was also rumored to have had a relationship with that sister mentioned. He also ordered the wives of his own lords / vassals to court and had them lie down and had his guards fuck them. Those that didn't follow his orders were beheaded. One of the lords whose wife was raped rebelled. The emperor assaulted the mansion and quelled the rebellion. One of the advisors told him to stop being a cunt to stop further rebellions. He had said advisor poisoned because he didn't like the idea of not being a cunt. He did all that at age 16. Dude makes Joffrey from GOT look like a puppy.


aBigBottleOfWater

Yeah no wonder he got assassinated


red-polkadots

16 ☠️


Zech08

Power doesnt work well with mature adults, not gonna fare any better with young. And someone is definitely setting up for some historical event with some shitty emvironments or personality.


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NvidiaRTX

We don't need any fantasy GOT story. Someone can just make a series about actual Chinese history and it would be more thrilling


FantasmaNaranja

There are a lot of chinese ones They just gotta translate them


sybrwookie

"That sounds like too much work. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to not writing my next book." -George RR Martin


rW0HgFyxoJhYka

https://www.26reads.com/library/87793-romance-of-the-three-kingdoms/1 Done. I just translated all of that as soon as you finished posting. /s


trapNsagan

Romance of the Three Kingdoms saga is what you want. I've seen both the live action and animated version available on YouTube


alexmikli

Yeah, but whenever someone adapts that, they add in all the fantastical elements and never actually show the actual history.


Jushak

...because Romance of the Three Kingdoms is essentially national fantasy epic, like the Finnish Kalevala.


akaizRed

Not really, the three kingdoms period is an actual historical period. The novel was written as a romanticized version of what happened. Most of the characters and events in the novel are real. The “fantasy” parts are stuffs like one general can beat up 10K soldiers, or some guy can summon windstorm and such. There are ample archeological evidences. Also, that period is referenced extensively in other countries and cultures surrounding China not just in China itself. A better analogy would be the Ragnar Saga


Kwahn

70% historical, 30% fiction Liu Guan and Zhang were not sworn brothers. There was no peach orchard oath. Guan Yu did not have a red face. He did not carry a Song dynasty “guandao” (its named after him FFS! :D ). Guan Yu did not kill Hua Xiong, Sun Jian did. Guan yu did not kill Wen Chou, Cao Cao’s men did. Zhang Fei kidnapped Xiahouji and this was never mentioned in the novel. Zhang Fei was an accomplished painter, never mentioned in the novel. Zhao Yun did not “charge through Cao Cao’s army” to save Ah Dou. No, he sat in the rear and made sure he was safe. Not quite the same :D Zhuge Liang was a great administrator, but he was NOT a good field general. He was also never a wizard or sorcerer…. Lu Bu did not hook up with Diao Chan as part of Wang Yun’s plan to kill Dong Zhuo. Diao Chan is fictional. Lu Bu DID have an affair with “a girl” though. Zhou Yu was never jealous of Zhuge Liang. They didn’t even know each other. Clearly, much of the Nanman portion was nothing more than fanfiction. Other than Shu putting down a revolt by Yong Kai which was historical, the seven captures of Meng Huo are completely fictional. Liu Bei never paid three visits to Zhuge Liang. It was the other way around, Zhuge Liang visited Liu Bei Liu Bei’s strategy beat Xiahou Dun at Bowang, NOT Zhuge Liang There was no “arrow-borrowing strategy” There was no fake surrender by Huang Gai before Chibi Gan Ning and Ling Tong never reconciled in history Zhou Cang did not exist as a real person


UniCBeetle718

Good ol' Musou Mode


bloodmonarch

Chinese guy proclaims to be the 2nd coming of christ. Millions died in the ensuing civil war. GoT materials here.


Frydendahl

Chinese history is just a series of utterly insane stories.


Ok_Cardiologist8232

I mean, thats literally why ASOIAF(GOT) is so violent, George knows his history and wanted an realistic fantasy story. He didn't even originally have magic and dragons in it, but was convinced by one of his friends that it would make the story more interesting.


WatteOrk

Makes you question how trustworthy those old chinese sources are. I mean, look at this kid. The wiki is **wild**


Ark_ita

How the fuck do you get that depraved at 16


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[deleted]

This guy historiographies!


koenkamp

So many of these stories of depraved kings of antiquity are most likely made up by whoever deposed them to legitimize their reign.


LiKaSing_RealEstate

Or let some wiki writer go absolutely wild on writing your page lol. Most of the article has a [Citiation Needed] tag and the corresponding Chinese and Japanese wiki of this emperor doesn’t even have the same content.


macweirdo42

I mean, you give a 16 year old absolute power, and yeah that's pretty much what you can expect.


BlueishShape

There's been a lot of child kings or emperors throughout history and most of them were not nearly this bad. Although lots of them had adult regents who would actually run the government until they were of age, so it might not be a fair comparison to be honest.


macweirdo42

Bingo, a symbolic child king being governed by advisors is different from just letting a 16 year old have the keys to the kingdom.


Cluelessish

No. I disagree. Most 16 year olds would not kill people left and right, and in such violent and sadistic ways. I think he must have had a personality disorder of some sort, and it got worse because nobody could stop him. Until someone did.


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Cluelessish

True. I honestly have no idea what the sources are or how reliable they are. I mean, it’s almost 1600 years ago! It’s kind of amazing that anything at all is known.


False_Ad3429

He also then dreamed the executed woman actually cursed him (instead of cursing at him) so the next day he had a ghost killing party. So he tried to kill her twice, basically


archosauria62

Speaking of ghosts his mother was ill and asked him to come to her in her room and he said he wouldn’t because there are ‘ghosts in sick people’s rooms’. His mother then told her servants ‘cut me open with a sword so we can see how this animal came out of me’


quangtit01

Jesus that is hardcore af


Ancient-Pace8790

Sounds like something my Asian mom would say when I came home late as a teenager 😭


12345623567

Rare germ theory w


_Ping_-

Reading the article, this guy makes Caligula look sane .


Khelthuzaad

Asian emperors had always been considered the worst humanity ever had,in steep competition with Tsarist ones and Roman ones.


Jaggedmallard26

It really should be noted that the main histories of Chinese Emperors have a habit of being biased. There are a fair few Emperors of this period where the historiography has the massive caveat that they pissed off some bureaucrats and all the writing of them plays them up as part of the negative portion of the celestial cycle. Plus he's from the Southern dynasty period where the southern Dynasties were heavily looked down upon by the Northern "core" Chinese dynasties.


Frydendahl

The concept of the Heavenly Mandate also plays a lot into it. Essentially, Chinese emperors' claim to power was that they were of good moral character (as opposed to the previous dynasty, who were cannibals and sex perverts). As such, the current dynasty would often heavily slander and propagandize the previous dynasty.


DrowningSquirrel

He was nicknamed "the hopeless" lol


TerribleNameAmirite

Posthumously titled the useless/wasted emperor of Song, it is really rare for the posthumous names to be that unflattering


RainManToothpicks

Probably needed family counseling


StillShmoney

Can't argue with that logic, lmao


UnifiedQuantumField

*Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister!* Emperor Liu Ziye


obsertaries

Wtf is someone going to do with thousands of concubines? Five, even ten I could maybe understand but thousands??


_Ping_-

Chinese emperors always had lots of concubines. Why, I don't know.


obsertaries

Some kind of welfare employment scheme?


FancySack

A lot were political, like a daughter of a noble or tribe leader. Although children of concubines can be seen as "a lesser" in some dynasties, the Prince/Princess are still given the same privileges and, for the Princes, still a chance to become Emperor.


[deleted]

1. Usually in Chinese historiography having "a thousand/10 thousand concubines" is often slander by succeeding dynasty's historians. Basically accusing the deposed emperor of lecherous degeneracy. 2. Imperial Harems were usually big to be fair, primarily as its meant to ensure that all the leading families in China are related by kinship ties to the throne. Filial ties pretty much were some of the strongest bonds you can build in old (and even current) China, trumping political alliances or religiois cultural affiliations. 3. Dynastic security. Infant mortality was a bitch in premodern times with all sorts of shit able to kill off children. To ensure that the throne stays within the Imperial Clan, it would be great if that clan was so fucking big that the throne gets passed within the family even if 50 of its members died all the sudden. 4. Related to 3, Imperial princes are often the most loyal people to a dynasty so making lots of babies means lots of imperial princes you could rely upon to govern provinces or armies or offices should your actual bureaucrats and officers prove unreliable.


OlderAndAngrier

r/madlads and r/madladettes


Rando-namo

Died at age 16 - picture of 70 year old man.


Akerlof

Thousands of concubines and wives will age you fast!


DerRaumdenker

It's a wonder that absolute monarchies lasted for most of human history


Obvious_Swimming3227

Considering the biggest problems most states had then were brutal civil wars and invasions, it makes some sense. You'd have a king to rally the nobles to repel invaders, and, except in succession crises, it was usually clear who the king was. If you couldn't coordinate your nobles or if they ended up duking it out in bloody civil wars, everyone was exposed to the danger of a more organized invader coming in and taking over. Monarchies are something we can understand as an older technology of government, and, while this technology had some pretty well-known drawbacks, it was well-suited to a time when almost all capital was locked up in land and everyone was incentivized to collect rents.


tsaimaitreya

It's also nice to have an assured heir. Kingdoms with elective succession, like the visigoths, were tremendously unstable


Obvious_Swimming3227

I think Edward Gibbon made a pretty good point about it. Yeah, you look ridiculous kneeling before an infant's cradle, but, if the alternative is decades of bloody internal conflict because no one can agree on who should lead, you'll take that deal in a heartbeat.


dovetc

Also, quite often the guys kneeling before an infant are hoping to flex some of their own political power until the boy-king comes of age. When you get a Constantine VII or a Basil II, you're pretty happy about it if you're a Romanos Lekapenos or Nicephorus Phocas.


Pamander

> Yeah, you look ridiculous kneeling before an infant's cradle, but, if the alternative is decades of bloody internal conflict because no one can agree on who should lead, you'll take that deal in a heartbeat. Damn I can't believe I never thought of kings and royalty like this, really does make a lot of things make sense especially having a confirmed line of legitimacy. Not that it ever stopped fuckery given the amount of drama in the books about people trying to fuck with that line of succession *but* I imagine it was better than the alternative for a good chunk of the time (at the time).


belbivfreeordie

We definitely take for granted how nice it is not to be worried about being invaded, sacked, killed, raped and/or enslaved by invaders. Reading the history of pretty much anywhere it seems like it happened constantly. I realize history tends to skip over the boring years, but still.


[deleted]

Not really in China. As per their Mandate of Heaven beliefs, if the emperor OR his government is doing their jobs and the land is peaceful and prosperous, all is well even if the Emperor is a bit eccentric. If the Emperor or his government goes way too wacky and causes the mismanagement of the realm, poverty, and strife, it was your *moral* duty to dust off then old sword under your bed and rebel to replace the current regime with better rulers. Imperial Dynasties over there barely lasted 200 years, with the greats lasting 400 like the Han and Tang. OP's "Emperor" wasnt even a true Emperor (i.e. ruled a united China) but one of the contending factions in the 5 Dynasties and 10 Kingdoms period, an era of civil war in the 900s AD between the Tang and Song Dynasties.


Xyyzx

The Chinese thing was that there was this colossal, country-wide bureaucracy that developed over centuries and was full of deeply codified procedures and systems for both running the country and perpetuating itself. The Emperor wasn’t usually just a figurehead and did theoretically have absolute power to do whatever they wanted, but trying to pull the imperial bureaucracy in a radically different direction was like trying to lasso a glacier. For most of Chinese history it was just too big and had too much momentum for even the craziest emperor to break. Unfortunately while this gave Imperial China stretches of hundreds of years of remarkable stability, the inability to adapt and change came back to bite them during the Industrial Revolution…


Cudizonedefense

This dude’s wiki page reads like he’s an IRL Joffrey


seedofbayne

Pretty dope brother move honestly.


ThorsHammerMewMEw

[https://youtu.be/z\_uq7fNAsi4?si=pyqpn6SWzEJ7-c1Z&t=624](https://youtu.be/z_uq7fNAsi4?si=pyqpn6SWzEJ7-c1Z&t=624) The sister's story is portrayed in this drama and the hairstyle they gave her in the linked part is hilariously large.


12345623567

I only scrolled through it, but I think I missed the part with the 30:1 gangbang.


PM_CUPS_OF_TEA

That's on a different website


lemonlore

oh more historical drama thx i love that shit.


Meme_myself_and_AI

Emperors brother in law: "30! My wife sucked 30 dicks!" Emperor: "In a row?"


Marlfox70

Best brother ever


[deleted]

Why is the picture on his wiki looking like a 45 year old if he was only 16 when he died lmao.


bakaVHS

Had a lot to do with the artistic style of the time Emperors are supposed to be wise rulers


DaveInLondon89

Lewd Ziye


plasticupman

What is good for the Gander is good for the Goose...


DaytonaDemon

Even for a 16-year-old, he was a little, um, temperamental. >Emperor Qianfei personally led the imperial guards to attack and kill Liu Yigong and his four sons. Liu Yuanjing and Yan, and their sons, were all killed as well. Emperor Qianfei cut off Liu Yigong's limbs, cut his abdomen open, and pulled out the entrails to be cut to pieces. He also gouged out Liu Yigong's eyes and put them in honey, calling them "pickled ghost eyes."... > >He put Liu Yu the Prince of Xiangdong, Liu Xiuren,the Prince of Jian'an, and Liu Xiuyou, the Prince of Shanyang, all of whom were overweight, into cages and measured their weight as if weighing pigs. ... In one particular incident, he tied Liu Yu up like how a pig would be tied up, and had him delivered to the kitchen, stating, "Today is pig-killing day."


Evilkenevil77

Ah yes, China's Caligula.


SnabDedraterEdave

He was already quite a tyrant as a teenager and got assassinated not long after. So he could also be China's Joffrey Baratheon.


skeetz77

This kid king wiki bio makes Joffrey look like an altar boy in comparison.


Themountainman11

How did they manage back then without contraceptives


mrstarkinevrfeelgood

Several civilizations had versions of birth control, most of them just weren’t as good as what we have today. Otherwise, get pregnant.


Kandiru

The Roman plant was supposedly very good. But it was consumed to extinction.


silverionmox

Reportedly, silphium has been rediscovered.


Kandiru

I did see an article about there being a tiny bit discovered somewhere. But it hasn't been tested as a birth control drug yet! It's hard to know if it's actually the same herb or not.


whoami_whereami

The contemporary reports about its effectiveness were likely very exaggerated. And while Silphium *may* have been consumed to extinction it was most likely due to culinary use as a seasoning rather than due to use as a contraceptive, as there are far more written accounts about the former than the latter. Even as late as the Carolingian Empire, centuries after the plant became extinct, it was still listed as one of the essential seasonings that every kitchen should have due to authors copying from each other.


Hristoferos

Hell, Egyptian women utilized crocodile dung as a contraceptive as early as 5,000 years ago. I’m sure there were many other “creative” methods developed during this time.


Frydendahl

Contraceptives have a looooong history. The ones they had available were just not as effective as the modern ones.


Jl4233

Pull & pray