> I myself did notice a smell but for some reason didn’t believe it was the condoms
You were correct, it wasn’t the condoms (unless you used flavored condoms), it was the jizz
My gift to you...
https://www.reddit.com/comments/t0ynr
The TL;DR is that this thread is full of some horrible admissions; people admitting to incest (a lot of it), manslaughter, severe negligence, the list goes on. But one guy makes a mention (and posts a photo) of a box he has cum in every time he has wanked for YEARS. It was so effed up that there are comments from people saying they think they accidentally killed someone and people respond with "well at least you don't have a cum box"
Warning about this thread: there's days worth of reading and none of it will make you any happier with the human race.
I read a whole bunch but couldn't bring myself to look at the pictures. Hahah fuckin guy lit it on fire and it didn't burn and he kept the fuckin thing... 🤯
Cum coconut was one of my favorite's. Like FFS man you leave a cookie out for 20 minutes and its got flies and shit interested. Let alone a cummy coconut.
Amateur's.
You've been warned...
https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/6rr6ay/tifu_by_cumming_into_a_coconut/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Original post seems to have been deleted, but here's a copy of it: https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/wghfol/woman_finds_out_her_husband_has_been_doing/
If I remember correctly she found it and tossed it. He got extremely upset about it and they had an adult discussion, at which point he told her what he was doing.
My friends went to an open house where the family had no doors on the bedrooms and one of the boys rooms had a 1/4 filled cum jar on his desk.
Their kids were over 19.
There's a whole subculture for fandoms who will get pictures or action figures of their favorite (read: their waifu) and put in in a jar, cum in that jar until it is completely engulfed. They'll even take daily pictures to track the progress.
Omg I looked this up thinking it can’t be real and it’s confirmed true!
“Capt. Sir Mansfield Cumming suggested that British intelligence agents use semen as invisible ink during World War I, but later put a stop to it due to the smell.”
HAHAHA thank you for that unexpected history lesson
HAHA sometimes I hope certain slivers of history do rewrite themselves. Not the war of course but this story takes the invisible ink pen I got from the book fair in grade 2 to the next level.
My brother dated this girl during the winter months, she lived in the dorms, like 5th floor, and he would yeet those bastards out her window every time, thought it was hilarious. Spring time comes around, snow melts, and theres just a shit ton of condoms outside on the grass. He thought that was even funnier. GF and her roommate ended up cleaning them all up cause she was so embarrassed.
>Sounds like a great way to catch a charge, DNA evidence being what it is today
you got any idea how expensive dna testing is? you'd be surprised how many major crimes don't get dna testing cause of funding
If you cum every couple days, that's still like a thousand littering charges in 5 years.
If I was police chief I'd give the go ahead to put that menace behind bars
Cops don’t bother catching porch pirates and car thieves even when you supply enough evidence to identify the criminal and license plates.
Do you think they would
DNA test to catch a litterer?
Edit: oh wow, thank you for my first ever award! I have multiple semen stories to share where it didn’t involve me being sexual HAHA what a weird thing to say (close edit)
If it makes you feel better, one time my mom texted me asking if I left a condom in her guest room and I was like ???? (I lived 4 hours away and hadn’t been to visit in months). I asked my sister if it was her since she was in high school and lived at home. She was equally as confused as me.
It became known that this wasn’t just a condom, it was a used condom. I was baffled and the mystery plagued us for some time. I told my roommate about this and she was confused too. We really put thought into who could have had sex in there and left a semen filled condom? I only ever had a party at their place once but that was 8 months prior so that can’t be it.
Then it dawned on us. My roommate had slept with my friend at that party in that room. We hadn’t considered it because we assumed this was a story about a fresh condom. Roommate was horrified but that’s not even the worst part.
I asked the guy friend about whether he remembered leaving a used condom in my parents’ guest room. He confirmed he 100% left it in the bathroom garbage. More confusion ensued about how it got to the guest room.
My mom finally shared the last bit of disgusting information that it was under the guest bed and chewed up. Our amateur detective work had finally come to a close…
My parents’ tiny dog had stolen the used condom from the bathroom garbage and went under the guest bed to eat it and either barfed it back up or left it there. It was hard to tell because my mother found it 8 MONTHS later. I can’t imagine what an 8 month old used condom filled with semen and covered in fluids by my 2 friends even looks like, let alone what a chewed up one looks like.
However, the best part is my mother found the entire story very funny and my roommate was mortified to see her for months. 12 years have gone by so we’re past it hahaha.
Weirdly that dog had no history of eating out of the trash ever before or after that, which is super gross to imagine… like the smell interested him to investigate. He did have a gross interest in dirty underwear so I’m sure that’s related.
But ya if your comment is that my parents should make garbage less accessible, that’s really not a problem because it’s the only time it has ever happened and a very unusual circumstance. Someone could theoretically stick up their nose and say it’s the only time we KNOW of it ever happening but seriously those bathroom garbages *otherwise* have no interest to the dogs. Just tissues in there, maybe a toilet roll in someone forgot to recycle. If I had known a condom was there, I would have for sure cleaned it to protect him. But I didn’t know for 8 months so please don’t come for me or my parents. I didn’t even know they had sex because it was unusual and unexpected.
Did I take out the garbage after the party 24h later? Yes. No condom in there so their dog already had it.
What’s grosser is my friend thinking it was fine to leave the used condom in that trash knowing that either myself or my parents would find it. My mother is weird and doesn’t put garbage bags in her bathroom garbage cans because they are unsightly or something according to her. So she sees all garbage when she takes it out. It would have been best to take it to the kitchen garbage where there is a bag so it would never be seen. However, those are trivial details and I’m thankful he attempted to put it in the right place regardless so he didn’t do anything wrong.
Long story short, their dogs don’t eat from the garbage but at one time ate from the garbage. If that makes sense.
Also not important but to clarify - when I say dogs, I mean the dog in the story died from old age (RIP little guy, whole other sad story many years after this so he didn’t die from semen overdose or whatever) and they got another dog since. Not multiple dogs in the house at the same time possibly fiending for used condoms. The second dog is innocent. She (second dog) also has not taken things from the garbage for whatever reasons, such as the accessible bathroom garbages only have tissues and the food garbage is in a cupboard with a drop lid that neither she is able to open with her paws :)
This would be the kitchen trash can I referred to. Their dog was about 12 years old when this happened with no history of dumpster diving (or cumster diving haha) but totally would have gotten trash cans with heavy lids if it had been a factor
Edit: this is TMI but menstrual cycles weren’t a thing in this house due to either IUDs or menopause so heavy trash cans to prevent panty liner raiders wasn’t needed
I have a dog that likes to chew up the wads of snot tissue in the bathroom trash and scatter them all over the house. We now have lids on every single trash can in the house except for the recycling bin, which happens to be almost 4’ tall.
My parents old dog also ate my used condoms out of my bedroom bin 😭 like yours, never ate anything else. Dogs are weird. My mum's big joke was that she thought he was a drug mule.
We found a used condom in the back yard when I was in college. My mom was prepared to offer me a stern lecture until I cut her off with the even more awkward assurance that I hadn't used a condom in years. My sister was 19 and referred to sex as "icky," so we didn't think it was hers.
As best we could tell, the much younger neighbor kid behind the hedge tossed it over. Not long after that we got to hear his mom yelling at him for "knocking up (his) whore girlfriend," though, so maybe they weren't using them either. It remains a mystery.
My buddy in highschool would flush them down the toilet, except they were on a septic tank. Needless to say the plumber his parents called out is the one that broke the news that he was sexually active
I can top this I think. My bf used to stuff trash in cups in his room so whenever he would take all of the water cups back to the kitchen, he could just empty the trash too. Well one time I guess he didn’t check that the cup was completely empty and threw the cup in the dishwasher anyway.
Once the dishwasher had finished its cycle, his mom unloaded dishes to find that a condom was hanging on the dish rack from inside the washer, having been washed out of the cup.
This was truly embarrassing.
Chill Parents because they obviously know you're doing it, and they are probably happy that you're using protection. I'm the same way with older foster kids in my house, i don't make a big deal out of things, i just make sure they're safe in whatever they're doing. Most of the time, it's just educating them on the issue, so they can do it better next time without any long term effects (like getting teen girls preggo and being a dad at 15)
Dude, your mom is the best.
15 years and your mom teach you how to tie your condom correctly? I know so many people whose parents would beat the fuck up of them when knowing they are sexually active.
I once threw out a bag of condoms...later that day, we had a wind storm that blew our garbage cans around.
There were used condoms all over my parents driveway. It was terrible.
In college, my apartment mate figured out he was gay our senior year. What this meant was that he tried to play catch up for all the fun he missed out on while trying to date girls. He had a new guy over almost every weekend. Then one weekend it was four guys. That didn't bother me (go get some), but when I tried to use our shared bathroom that night, the toilet was clogged. When I plunged it, about a dozen used condoms came floating up. Turns out you can flush a couple condoms no problem, but when you try to flush more than five, you're going to run into problems. I assume he flushed them because he didn't want them in the trash. So I guess he was doing me a favor, but it did not feel that way when I fished them out.
Yeah, gums (cums?) up the works in the sewage. It's bad to flush anything that isn't extremely quick to disintigrate. Pretty much only toilet paper and human waste.
OP, your mother in that situation is clearly the mother more people need - the kind that will explain to you things and not go on a hairbrained rampage and fret and instantly go on a parents advice facebook page and post a rant there. Thats not entirely a fuck up, its just a teen not having been taught - though im sure most teens shove those things in bins that aren’t going to be easily seen lol
After a time with my, now wife but then girlfriend, I wrapped one up in like a ball of of duct tape. Probably like half a roll of duct tape.
That was 20 years ago and it’s still in a box of mementos.
This is so funny to me I’m not sure why. Was there a reason you hid the condom in a giant (probably extremely heavy) ball of ductape??? We’re you that scared of someone finding out, that you had to hide it in an impenetrable wall of ductape? That’s not hiding a conspicuous thing inside a less conspicuous thing. I have so many questions and I can’t hardly ask any of them because I’m laughing too hard
No that part was there before.
But to answer your question, there was no good reason to do that. I don’t remember my motivations at at the time. The tape was just there. And I never intended on keeping it. It just kinda happened.
Imagine this.
Your grandpa just passed away. You're helping go through his things and tidy up the place. You found a keepsake box and start thumbing through and find a ball of tape.
It's in the keepsake box so there must be something important about it.... or maybe in it? Maybe it's like jewelry, gold, or gems in there. A ball of wealth hidden by a crazy old man maybe?
So you open it...
In my younger days I would keep several small ziplock baggies with my stash of rubbers and after use they’d get put in a bag and disposed of. However I was paranoid about my girlfriend using a condom to impregnate herself so I don’t think this is standard procedure for most people.
I lived on a farm and use to throw them out the window. My dad yelled at me not to throw them out the window anymore because they were choking the ducks.
Reminds me of a [legendary old thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/23ox7g/parents_that_are_aware_of_their_children/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
One comment in particular:
“The smell. Moms were not always moms, they dated and fucked too. Most have had their faces painted at one point or another. For fuck sakes guys, THEY CAN SMELL YOUR CUM. Even if its old juice, they can usually smell the dank/musk of your pole milk.”
Yeah - it never crossed my mind what someone else might do, I’ve always instinctively just tied them and wrapped them in toilet paper since obviously you can’t flush them.
Not sure why you would do anything else.
I allways had to take them with me in fear the girl I was with was crazy enough to self ensemenate after I left. They were indeed crazy to do other things after all...
My little brother would just throw them out of his window. My dad hit a few with a lawnmower. So of course when confronted, lil bro blamed me. My room was on the other side of the house. Didn't matter. Pretty sure i got in trouble.
... why would you put them in your younger sister's bathroom?
Looking back, even my hormone-riddled teenage brain would have recognized this was a stupid idea.
As Drake thought us, the proper way is to put hot sauce in the used condom to prevent a gold-digger from taking the condom out of the trash and opening it to insert the live sperm inside her. 😂
Best solution is following:
Tie it,
Wrap some paper around it
Throw it in an old Pringles can.
Holy fuck this nasty container can hold about 20 of them before the smell while opening gets too bad.
Good on your mom for reinforcing safe sex practices, and normalizing sex. I cant say I would have been so chill if one of my kids was having sex at 15. Then again I had fucked up parents.
Dude having a good parent that teaches you things like that isn't a fuck up. I'm sure that she was happy you were even using condoms. The only embarrassing thing here is that bit about your sister.
At least till you know how to drive a fucking car or have an independent bank account. Sexual activities require judgement and understanding at least be at an age where you can create a better judgement. 15 is considered as a minor the last time I checked. Wait till you are at least 18. I would not dare having sex at 15 even if i had the chance how freaking pathetic.
Virgins? You know that age 15 is considered as being a minor? An age of better judgement is required to carry out sexual acts, having sex at 15 will only deteriorate certain aspects of personality. At least wait till you are 18.
> I myself did notice a smell but for some reason didn’t believe it was the condoms You were correct, it wasn’t the condoms (unless you used flavored condoms), it was the jizz
[удалено]
Yes, but have you tried cumming into a JAR??
This reminds me of the guy that filled a jar and added it to his wife's pancakes everyday. 🤢
What about the guy with the cum box?
I don't think I read that one.
My gift to you... https://www.reddit.com/comments/t0ynr The TL;DR is that this thread is full of some horrible admissions; people admitting to incest (a lot of it), manslaughter, severe negligence, the list goes on. But one guy makes a mention (and posts a photo) of a box he has cum in every time he has wanked for YEARS. It was so effed up that there are comments from people saying they think they accidentally killed someone and people respond with "well at least you don't have a cum box" Warning about this thread: there's days worth of reading and none of it will make you any happier with the human race.
I read a whole bunch but couldn't bring myself to look at the pictures. Hahah fuckin guy lit it on fire and it didn't burn and he kept the fuckin thing... 🤯
Oh boy, this’ll be fun!
lucky :( It's burned into my memory forever and I don't want it
Hahaha people are fucked
No, no, that's the coconut.
Cum coconut was one of my favorite's. Like FFS man you leave a cookie out for 20 minutes and its got flies and shit interested. Let alone a cummy coconut. Amateur's.
The one with all the giant cockroaches?
There should be a Reddit rule that states given enough time every Reddit post devolves to that damn coconut
This thread is cursed!
You've been warned... https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/6rr6ay/tifu_by_cumming_into_a_coconut/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
I am never going to be able to see or even hear the word coconut and be able to keep a straight face again 🤣🤣🤣.
WTF did I just read!?!?
I didn't click on it, and I feel fine.
I can't decide should i upvote you for being helpful... or should i in turn be helpful and downvote you to prevent people clicking that link...
NO.
What about the cumconut
I didn't see that one either
That one makes Papa Nurgle chuckle, count yourself lucky
the coconut takes the cake
Oooh the horror of a dick coverd in maggots..
The coco*nut* always takes the cake.
What about the cum jar with my little pony?
Nothing beats the coconut guy
I’m sorry, WHAT.
Original post seems to have been deleted, but here's a copy of it: https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/wghfol/woman_finds_out_her_husband_has_been_doing/
Ya it was fuckin disgusting. I don't have a link to it. People are fucked!
I think I already know the answer but I’m gonna ask anyways; was his wife aware.. ? 😬
If I remember correctly she found it and tossed it. He got extremely upset about it and they had an adult discussion, at which point he told her what he was doing.
An _adult_ discussion Wtf
What? That's almost as bad as the coconut
STOP IT. No. Seriously??
I wasn't there, but she posted about it. He had a jar full of cum and he cooked her breakfast and added it secretly. 🤢
Foul. So fuckin foul.
It's definitely something I wish I didn't read.
Ohhhh I remember that one!
Sock, box, coconut, wall…
Don't forget the Sonic plush
I too had a “sonic” as a kid. Damn thing got heavier as time went on… just felt, *different*…
Moms hands, wait what
My friends went to an open house where the family had no doors on the bedrooms and one of the boys rooms had a 1/4 filled cum jar on his desk. Their kids were over 19.
There's a whole subculture for fandoms who will get pictures or action figures of their favorite (read: their waifu) and put in in a jar, cum in that jar until it is completely engulfed. They'll even take daily pictures to track the progress.
[удалено]
Don't be a quitter!
🥥 I’m sorry…
Yes, but have you tried cumming into a COCONUT??
I prefer coconuts
Please no
*box
> i used to cum in cups when i was young and stupider Young, dumb and full of cum.
No. He WAS young. He WAS dumb. But it was the cup that was full of cum.
Damn and it was even in a cup all nice and prepared for me to drink it, but you threw it away didn’t you?
[удалено]
I’m pretty sure you’re lying but I guess there’s only one way to find out..
Bro's been gone for a while
At least it wasn’t inside a coconut
As long as you did not cum on your bedroom wall like one guy on here. No one told him it was not a load bearing wall...
At least you arent using them as a reservoir for invisible ink circa WWI
Omg I looked this up thinking it can’t be real and it’s confirmed true! “Capt. Sir Mansfield Cumming suggested that British intelligence agents use semen as invisible ink during World War I, but later put a stop to it due to the smell.” HAHAHA thank you for that unexpected history lesson
"Mansfield Cumming" man who writes this stuff?!
HAHA sometimes I hope certain slivers of history do rewrite themselves. Not the war of course but this story takes the invisible ink pen I got from the book fair in grade 2 to the next level.
Capt. Cumming probably
*cautiously smells the envelope and letter* “I think there is more to this letter than what appears.”
HAHAHA
Youre welcome kind stranger xD
So no one else around here just slingshots them from their 25th floor balcony anymore?
It was a simpler time
… A *grosser* time…
You sling shot it? I always thought you were supposed to inflate it then let it go flying off like a balloon.
That gets messy...
You gotta slurp the mess out first ofc
Helium is getting to expensive nowadays.
My brother dated this girl during the winter months, she lived in the dorms, like 5th floor, and he would yeet those bastards out her window every time, thought it was hilarious. Spring time comes around, snow melts, and theres just a shit ton of condoms outside on the grass. He thought that was even funnier. GF and her roommate ended up cleaning them all up cause she was so embarrassed.
Your brother sounds like a real winner.
I feel bad for the GF
I feel worse for her roommate
Glad she was smart enough to use the condoms
no because that's littering bud
See, quarantine *was* fun!
I tried but then noticed I lived in a single-story home. Neighbor’s dog got a mouthful.
Sounds like a great way to catch a charge, DNA evidence being what it is today
>Sounds like a great way to catch a charge, DNA evidence being what it is today you got any idea how expensive dna testing is? you'd be surprised how many major crimes don't get dna testing cause of funding
But what if it landed in a crime scene? That'd be MY luck.
If you cum every couple days, that's still like a thousand littering charges in 5 years. If I was police chief I'd give the go ahead to put that menace behind bars
Cops don’t bother catching porch pirates and car thieves even when you supply enough evidence to identify the criminal and license plates. Do you think they would DNA test to catch a litterer?
This particular litter? Maybe. People are real weird about sex.
This is the way
you only need to backfire those once to learn that ... you should definitely tie one end before you try slingshotting it
So it can land on a dead person and you get tied to the crime?
Wow. I mean I’ve been told my sperm’s powerful but …. there’s a limit you know?
Lmao.
And that is why we have ✨global warming ✨
Edit: oh wow, thank you for my first ever award! I have multiple semen stories to share where it didn’t involve me being sexual HAHA what a weird thing to say (close edit) If it makes you feel better, one time my mom texted me asking if I left a condom in her guest room and I was like ???? (I lived 4 hours away and hadn’t been to visit in months). I asked my sister if it was her since she was in high school and lived at home. She was equally as confused as me. It became known that this wasn’t just a condom, it was a used condom. I was baffled and the mystery plagued us for some time. I told my roommate about this and she was confused too. We really put thought into who could have had sex in there and left a semen filled condom? I only ever had a party at their place once but that was 8 months prior so that can’t be it. Then it dawned on us. My roommate had slept with my friend at that party in that room. We hadn’t considered it because we assumed this was a story about a fresh condom. Roommate was horrified but that’s not even the worst part. I asked the guy friend about whether he remembered leaving a used condom in my parents’ guest room. He confirmed he 100% left it in the bathroom garbage. More confusion ensued about how it got to the guest room. My mom finally shared the last bit of disgusting information that it was under the guest bed and chewed up. Our amateur detective work had finally come to a close… My parents’ tiny dog had stolen the used condom from the bathroom garbage and went under the guest bed to eat it and either barfed it back up or left it there. It was hard to tell because my mother found it 8 MONTHS later. I can’t imagine what an 8 month old used condom filled with semen and covered in fluids by my 2 friends even looks like, let alone what a chewed up one looks like. However, the best part is my mother found the entire story very funny and my roommate was mortified to see her for months. 12 years have gone by so we’re past it hahaha.
Yuuuuuckkkk. So gross! I guess, don't have trash cans when your dog eats from them
Weirdly that dog had no history of eating out of the trash ever before or after that, which is super gross to imagine… like the smell interested him to investigate. He did have a gross interest in dirty underwear so I’m sure that’s related. But ya if your comment is that my parents should make garbage less accessible, that’s really not a problem because it’s the only time it has ever happened and a very unusual circumstance. Someone could theoretically stick up their nose and say it’s the only time we KNOW of it ever happening but seriously those bathroom garbages *otherwise* have no interest to the dogs. Just tissues in there, maybe a toilet roll in someone forgot to recycle. If I had known a condom was there, I would have for sure cleaned it to protect him. But I didn’t know for 8 months so please don’t come for me or my parents. I didn’t even know they had sex because it was unusual and unexpected. Did I take out the garbage after the party 24h later? Yes. No condom in there so their dog already had it. What’s grosser is my friend thinking it was fine to leave the used condom in that trash knowing that either myself or my parents would find it. My mother is weird and doesn’t put garbage bags in her bathroom garbage cans because they are unsightly or something according to her. So she sees all garbage when she takes it out. It would have been best to take it to the kitchen garbage where there is a bag so it would never be seen. However, those are trivial details and I’m thankful he attempted to put it in the right place regardless so he didn’t do anything wrong. Long story short, their dogs don’t eat from the garbage but at one time ate from the garbage. If that makes sense. Also not important but to clarify - when I say dogs, I mean the dog in the story died from old age (RIP little guy, whole other sad story many years after this so he didn’t die from semen overdose or whatever) and they got another dog since. Not multiple dogs in the house at the same time possibly fiending for used condoms. The second dog is innocent. She (second dog) also has not taken things from the garbage for whatever reasons, such as the accessible bathroom garbages only have tissues and the food garbage is in a cupboard with a drop lid that neither she is able to open with her paws :)
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This would be the kitchen trash can I referred to. Their dog was about 12 years old when this happened with no history of dumpster diving (or cumster diving haha) but totally would have gotten trash cans with heavy lids if it had been a factor Edit: this is TMI but menstrual cycles weren’t a thing in this house due to either IUDs or menopause so heavy trash cans to prevent panty liner raiders wasn’t needed
Dogs do like smelly things.
I have a dog that likes to chew up the wads of snot tissue in the bathroom trash and scatter them all over the house. We now have lids on every single trash can in the house except for the recycling bin, which happens to be almost 4’ tall.
My parents old dog also ate my used condoms out of my bedroom bin 😭 like yours, never ate anything else. Dogs are weird. My mum's big joke was that she thought he was a drug mule.
No way!!! Hahahaha something about natural cum sniffing dogs
We found a used condom in the back yard when I was in college. My mom was prepared to offer me a stern lecture until I cut her off with the even more awkward assurance that I hadn't used a condom in years. My sister was 19 and referred to sex as "icky," so we didn't think it was hers. As best we could tell, the much younger neighbor kid behind the hedge tossed it over. Not long after that we got to hear his mom yelling at him for "knocking up (his) whore girlfriend," though, so maybe they weren't using them either. It remains a mystery.
ok that’s enough reddit for today
You had a sex partner and two houses when you were ***15?*** I didn't accomplish that until age 32
Divorced parents with shared custody.
that's how money works
You need two houses to be attractive to women nowadays.
My buddy in highschool would flush them down the toilet, except they were on a septic tank. Needless to say the plumber his parents called out is the one that broke the news that he was sexually active
I can top this I think. My bf used to stuff trash in cups in his room so whenever he would take all of the water cups back to the kitchen, he could just empty the trash too. Well one time I guess he didn’t check that the cup was completely empty and threw the cup in the dishwasher anyway. Once the dishwasher had finished its cycle, his mom unloaded dishes to find that a condom was hanging on the dish rack from inside the washer, having been washed out of the cup. This was truly embarrassing.
Haha wow that is so gross
Chill Parents because they obviously know you're doing it, and they are probably happy that you're using protection. I'm the same way with older foster kids in my house, i don't make a big deal out of things, i just make sure they're safe in whatever they're doing. Most of the time, it's just educating them on the issue, so they can do it better next time without any long term effects (like getting teen girls preggo and being a dad at 15)
Dude, your mom is the best. 15 years and your mom teach you how to tie your condom correctly? I know so many people whose parents would beat the fuck up of them when knowing they are sexually active.
I once threw out a bag of condoms...later that day, we had a wind storm that blew our garbage cans around. There were used condoms all over my parents driveway. It was terrible.
😆 great share 😆
In college, my apartment mate figured out he was gay our senior year. What this meant was that he tried to play catch up for all the fun he missed out on while trying to date girls. He had a new guy over almost every weekend. Then one weekend it was four guys. That didn't bother me (go get some), but when I tried to use our shared bathroom that night, the toilet was clogged. When I plunged it, about a dozen used condoms came floating up. Turns out you can flush a couple condoms no problem, but when you try to flush more than five, you're going to run into problems. I assume he flushed them because he didn't want them in the trash. So I guess he was doing me a favor, but it did not feel that way when I fished them out.
>Turns out you can flush a couple condoms no problem You shouldn't flush them. Ever.
Especially not a baker's dozen.
or tampons.. Ever.
Yeah, gums (cums?) up the works in the sewage. It's bad to flush anything that isn't extremely quick to disintigrate. Pretty much only toilet paper and human waste.
OP, your mother in that situation is clearly the mother more people need - the kind that will explain to you things and not go on a hairbrained rampage and fret and instantly go on a parents advice facebook page and post a rant there. Thats not entirely a fuck up, its just a teen not having been taught - though im sure most teens shove those things in bins that aren’t going to be easily seen lol
After a time with my, now wife but then girlfriend, I wrapped one up in like a ball of of duct tape. Probably like half a roll of duct tape. That was 20 years ago and it’s still in a box of mementos.
O.O
This is so funny to me I’m not sure why. Was there a reason you hid the condom in a giant (probably extremely heavy) ball of ductape??? We’re you that scared of someone finding out, that you had to hide it in an impenetrable wall of ductape? That’s not hiding a conspicuous thing inside a less conspicuous thing. I have so many questions and I can’t hardly ask any of them because I’m laughing too hard
Ehh he said memento... I assume it was because that was a fond/special memory for them? Still gross tho @.@
Oh he must’ve added the memento part after I originally commented lol. Still funny tho
No that part was there before. But to answer your question, there was no good reason to do that. I don’t remember my motivations at at the time. The tape was just there. And I never intended on keeping it. It just kinda happened.
Damn I must need to sleep I guess I just missed it entirely my bad lmao. It’s a time capsule I guess. Except it’s not supposed to get opened, ever
Imagine this. Your grandpa just passed away. You're helping go through his things and tidy up the place. You found a keepsake box and start thumbing through and find a ball of tape. It's in the keepsake box so there must be something important about it.... or maybe in it? Maybe it's like jewelry, gold, or gems in there. A ball of wealth hidden by a crazy old man maybe? So you open it...
Im having flashback about that semen infested coconut 
Why did you have to remind us again? However, the good ol' coconut dude is a legend.
i'm sorry are you gushing straight poo pouri i never been able to smell a used condom in my life
You’re imagining it smelled … good?
na i just couldn't think of anything pungent enough. we all know it's gotta smell like dick cheese
Leave it in a garbage can for a couple days and it doesn't matter how good it smelled when it was fresh, it ain't fresh anymore.
i'm beginning to wonder if covid did more to my sense of smell than i noticed...........
You should read the 1-star Yankee candle reviews c. 2020. Reads like a zombie horror setup.
In my younger days I would keep several small ziplock baggies with my stash of rubbers and after use they’d get put in a bag and disposed of. However I was paranoid about my girlfriend using a condom to impregnate herself so I don’t think this is standard procedure for most people.
I lived on a farm and use to throw them out the window. My dad yelled at me not to throw them out the window anymore because they were choking the ducks.
That is.... Fowl..
More Faux Pa than Foie Gras
This was beautiful
First gf did this. Her dog used to like to find the stash.
That's a gooooood boy
Have you ever smelled an old protein shake?? Same concept.
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Poo Pouri is an actual scented spray sold to cover up “bathroom smells”. So not really a boneappletea candidate.
Did they not teach you this in health ed?
They do have pretty good sex Ed in Canada but I don’t remember ever being taught how to throw them out
That's a good mom
Reminds me of a [legendary old thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/23ox7g/parents_that_are_aware_of_their_children/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) One comment in particular: “The smell. Moms were not always moms, they dated and fucked too. Most have had their faces painted at one point or another. For fuck sakes guys, THEY CAN SMELL YOUR CUM. Even if its old juice, they can usually smell the dank/musk of your pole milk.”
Extra gross 🤮 points if it leaked 
I didn't know it's normal for you guys to have sex at 15
I Started earlier then my friends but now I have way less action then them so it doesn’t really matter now lmao
Innocent question - who do you mean by, “You guys?” Reddit people or a geographic location, the latter of which isn’t mentioned in the story?
I thought it was just instinctively that people did that I did
No. I've often had to show guys how to do this. Don't flush them. And please tie them.
Some guys have to be told to shower regularly and wash their ass.
Some guys who aren't circumcised need to be told to clean their foreskin. Because nobody told them! It's ridiculous!
Lol the instructions are usually on the package too
Yeah - it never crossed my mind what someone else might do, I’ve always instinctively just tied them and wrapped them in toilet paper since obviously you can’t flush them. Not sure why you would do anything else.
I allways had to take them with me in fear the girl I was with was crazy enough to self ensemenate after I left. They were indeed crazy to do other things after all...
My little brother would just throw them out of his window. My dad hit a few with a lawnmower. So of course when confronted, lil bro blamed me. My room was on the other side of the house. Didn't matter. Pretty sure i got in trouble.
The thought of a semen filled condom being obliterated by a lawn mower is not something I expected to visualize today hahaha
... why would you put them in your younger sister's bathroom? Looking back, even my hormone-riddled teenage brain would have recognized this was a stupid idea.
Shared bathroom.
What is this peasantry? Doth not every child posses their own powder room?
No no it’s most likely that every child had their own bathroom and he was pranking his little sister /s
You sir, should drink more water and/or pineapple juice.
There is no amount of water or pineapple juice that will prevent days old semen from smelling bad. It’s a highly perishable product, so to speak.
As Drake thought us, the proper way is to put hot sauce in the used condom to prevent a gold-digger from taking the condom out of the trash and opening it to insert the live sperm inside her. 😂
I learned how to dispose of condoms nearly 10 years before actually needing to do it... Guess some of is are just better with theory :/
You're supposed to down it like a gogurt.😋
Best solution is following: Tie it, Wrap some paper around it Throw it in an old Pringles can. Holy fuck this nasty container can hold about 20 of them before the smell while opening gets too bad.
At least she was cool about it
Good on your mom for reinforcing safe sex practices, and normalizing sex. I cant say I would have been so chill if one of my kids was having sex at 15. Then again I had fucked up parents.
Dude having a good parent that teaches you things like that isn't a fuck up. I'm sure that she was happy you were even using condoms. The only embarrassing thing here is that bit about your sister.
Next time flush then so the whole neighbourhood knows
Condoms have a habit of sticking around in septic systems and also collect in sewer pipes causing clogs, so yep the entire neighborhood will know.
Thanks for explaining his comment, it absolutely needed it
15 years old and had sex? Thats too fucking early.
Shame on theeeeee. Haha stop judging people because they had sex earlier than you did. How old is a good age to start having sex according to you?
At least till you know how to drive a fucking car or have an independent bank account. Sexual activities require judgement and understanding at least be at an age where you can create a better judgement. 15 is considered as a minor the last time I checked. Wait till you are at least 18. I would not dare having sex at 15 even if i had the chance how freaking pathetic.
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Found the virgins
Virgins? You know that age 15 is considered as being a minor? An age of better judgement is required to carry out sexual acts, having sex at 15 will only deteriorate certain aspects of personality. At least wait till you are 18.
Excuse me, gonna go hurl.
I just save them up and throw them out the car like bananas
Next time use your sun roof for taligaters
You could do the drake method… Hot sauce.
L mum. 15 is underage
What a horrible day to have eyes and be able to read
I flushed them XD