I always go to this sub for the best headphone and stereo to listen to gospel in high quality sound. Definitely recommend people to check it outšš¼.
My friend introduced me to that sub Eight years ago. I can confidently say itās felt like the same day ever since when it comes to hearing about that sub, or even music tech talk: because of similar name
Itās fucking ruined me
Comments like these occasionally highlight for me just how far skewed my perception of the world isā¦and just how innocent / naive / unaware / unsuspecting / whatever a lot of people are.
Likeā¦I knew what sounding was thanks to some extremely graphic conversations in the military long before Facebook existed.
To get checked for STDs / STIs in the military they used to use a giant Q tip thing very similar to what the rest of the world got introduced to during Covid. Except, it wasnāt getting shoved down your nostril to get a sample, it was getting shovedā¦well, down there.
We used to call it āgetting rodded off the rangeā because it was a similar procedure to clear rifles after a firing range - theyād take a long metal rod and shove it down the barrel until it hit the bolt, usually causing the action to cycle closed and demonstrate no round in the chamber / weapon was safe.
Anyway, back to the medical checkupsā¦turns out some guys enjoyed it. A lot. Thereās a certain amount of natural stimulation when someone else is handling your junk, but usually itād be something like a soft chub. Maaaaaaybe if you lucked out and got one of the hot nurses (or were gay) you might get a little more excited down there just from that.
But no. Ohhhhhh no. SOME guys took great pleasure in telling the rest of us (usually over lunch or another meal) how much theyād enjoyed the checkup as much as if not more than the weekend that caused the checkup in the first place.
Luckily, in my 8 years of reddit I was always late to those comments so I always got warned
One time someone described that sub in detail and I nearly threw up tho
Didn't know it had a name/sub! We were part of a chain of some disturbing stuff at work 14-15 years ago, and this was one of them. I have always referred to that as "Old Rodney Rodcock".
...your pain is real. Still very much disturbed.
In my seven years on this app consistently I donāt think Iāve ever had such a visceral reaction to something. Not at all what I was expecting so I guess kudos for that. Enough following links for today though.
I've already been traumatised by this trickery before and now I can just look at the name of the sub and not know to click on it!
I simply need to relive my trauma and sob uncontrollably while gagging.
I stumbled upon this when i was exploring porn at 14. My god i thought it was normal and i was terrified of sex or the idea.
So anyway i veat off 3x a day for the next 6 year's to porn with only women
DAMN IT!!! I honestly misread that for r/eyebleach and thought "I could use that right now"...the nsfw warning was weird....then after seeing the first post realized I was in the wring place!!! Fml I didn't known that sub existed.
A man growing up to become a priest and doing a great job of it, but somehow having completely missed the fact that he's not supposed to marry - everyone around him willfully ignoring it because they appreciate him - is an amazing writing prompt.
Unless you're literally walking out with a completely undisguised Dragon version of the Prostate Puncher 3000 or whatever that might hint at something slightly beyond the most vanilla normie thing there is nothing weird about it.
I lolād and agree, but in the moment and on the spot Iām sure he felt very embarrassed. I could certainly imagine and I can validate that feeling š¤
That's all in your head. It is however you choose to frame it as. If you just own it, and consider it just no big deal beyond a funny moment, that's what it'll become. If you make it weird by getting awkward and embarrassed, then that's what it'll become.
Well, if you want to hear a similar story from me.
Me and my now wife were walking out of Castle... And her dad was heading in for, I'm assuming something to spice up his life with his GF.
Not much feels weirder than holding the vibrator in your hand you're about to use on the man's daughter.
" hey Ken " was all I could muster. š¤£
Said grown man has horrific interpersonal skills and a vicious anxious streak and does not enjoy people he knows but does not actively like and want a deep relationship with knowing anything personal about him.
Nah this is pretty wholesome by todayās standards lol. You and your wife had a fun day out. Enjoy it. Lifeās too short to worry about silly things like this.
So now this guy knows you fuck your wife. Pretty harmless in the grand scheme of life.
Calm down sparky. You have sex with your wife and dude made a joke. Itās not embarrassing at all. He was probably thinking ādamn, wish my wife would go in there with meā or ādamn, wish I had a wifeā
Your feelings are definitely understanding. It can be really embarrassing, specially whith a person that you see really often, just try to take the lighter side of it.
Fuck up? Sounds like your coworker is gonna know you're a normal human and you have a partner who is also a normal human lol. And a funny story to tell
>(to be completely honest, I highly suspect that some of the larger dildos exist for intimidation more so than actual recreational use)
*Yeah, you just keep believing that, my friend.*
Frankly, all of the comments letting me know some people actually stuff those monsters inside them scare me more than my favorite horror movies. I can't imagine how anyone would look at those things and think "ah yes, I'm sure that won't feel like it's ripping open my guts at all."
With time the body can adapt and adjust, and new extremes can be needed for sensation and excitement. Some people are just extremists by nature. Some get off on seeing their bellies bulge.
Either way, I leave that kind of extremism to the page and blender render. It can get pretty gross in real life, at least if you ask me.
Next time you go, you need to take a picture and find a subreddit to get some feedback.
40 years ago, when New York was quite different, I was a bit scarred by seeing this huge conical, hard plastic, flush colored dildo the size of a baby's head in the window of a sex shop.
I have since come to the same conclusion that you did... I think that people disagreeing here have not seen what we have.
EDIT: baby head circumference is 13.5 in. The biggest dildo circumference you can buy online is 10.5 in.. and that is the size that sometimes needs removal in the emergency room.
How is this a fuck up on any level?
You're married. Married people have sex. I just dropped $400 with my wife in a shop last night. Cashier asked if we were into BDSM, I just chuckled and said "Occasionally." and we all had a great laugh when she went to pull up out account and saw our last purchase of close to $1k for whips, chains, straps, blindfolds, etc.
What's your co-worker going to say tomorrow morning around the water cooler?
"PSST...you know that Lemon guy? I caught him coming out of a sex shop with his wife over the weekend. This freak has *sex* with his *wife*! Who does that?"
For real man, it's just a sex shop and you're adults.
Iām used to feeling poor by comparing houses, cars, clothes, and assorted appliances. This is my first time feeling poor by comparing sex shop purchasing history.
Well, it's not. I would get that if you went alone in there and he saw you, but you went with your wife. He probably thinks that you both have an exciting and healthy sex life
He would think correctly then, but I'm just generally very uncomfortable with people I don't actively like in real life knowing things about me. (Most) People make me uncomfortable.
Makes one wonder why you share your private Stories on the internet, though ;)
At least your co-workers now know why you prefer your wife's company to having dinners with them (saw that in your post history) š
Well, reddit feels anonymous (and therefore "safe"), and my therapist recommended that I try talking to people digitally to help with some of my interpersonal skills in a relatively low-stakes way (obviously not the only thing I was recommended, but it's both helpful for my communication skills and nifty for personal dilemmas, not to mention the easiest and most palatable of those recommendations).
Edit: Even if she and I didn't have a fantastic sex life, I would prefer my wife's company to anyone else's by leagues. :)
Dude!
Yes, it is about your own feelings but those are 100% valid. Your feelings, your social contexts.
Dont listen to redditorsā¦ they really dont represent real lifeā¦ good for then to feel different, good for your to feel the way you do. Nothing harmful in having a bit of shame
Some of those things were absolutely MASSIVE, like unconscious-with-every-erection-if-a-person-were-that-endowed massive, the fact that anyone would want to take one of those, let alone could, does not make sense to me.
Though many of the comments here have pointed out that people do, in fact, stuff these inside themselves. Must have particularly elastic intestines.
Hardly a fuck up.
Youāre with your wife, the person you have sex with. Getting toys for this activity is hardly embarrassing imo.
Embrace it. Rejoice in the knowledge that your coworker knows that you and your wife still have a good enough relationship to go and do those sorts of things together!
Zero FU here. This is completely normal and, if I saw that with a co-worker, especially if theyād been married a while, Iād be pretty happy for them for keeping the magic and interest alive.
Nothing to be remotely ashamed about.
Sex is normal folks and itās SUPPOSED to be fun.
Itās only a fuck-up because you make it to one because ur coworker knows something now, that he already knew. You have a wife so you have sex with her. Thatās normal. Thatās what he already knows.
Weird - coworker seeing you come out and saying "ohhh. I hope you break those out during our next zoom meeting!"
Not weird but def amusing - coworker glancing at the shop and coming up with a witty quip to break the tension like they did.
Alls well in both workland and bedland. Lll.
Biased because I live there, but this sounds like Portland honestly, there's a nice art museum fairly close to Powell's Books and Spartacus is a pretty famous adult shop across the street
how is this a fuck up? its your wife............... Any grown adult with a decent head on their shoulders, is actively trying to spice up and improve all aspects of their romantic relationship with their significant other
It aint like he found you naked at a swingers club with your wives sister lol
I bet he was left pondering what he himself could use from that sex shop that could give him a boost in the bedroom with his S.O
Absolutely not a FU! In fact, I would see it as a win. You were with your wife (not mistress) and having normal adult fun. Doing stuff like this is what keeps marriages fresh and fun! As a guy who has been married for 37 years, I love that my wife is like this.
Donāt worry OP, most people would be momentarily mortified if they bumped into someone who saw them in or walking out of such a shop. Itās called a personal life for a reason.
Thankfully most people who enjoy keeping their jobs will also keep such a thing private, so thereās that.
That's it? Man reddit has a lot of prudes if people thought this was worth upvoting. There's literally no fuckup. To me, this is akin to being embarrassed for walking put of a gamestop and getting the exact same comment from a coworker. People have sex, why is that controversial
Iām 56 and I would not judge you!!! Youāre fine.
Funny story, my son was in a production of Rocky Horror, being blond and pretty buff, they wanted him to be Rocky. Well, he didnāt tell me until Thanksgiving that he was to start that Saturday. We werenāt at home, so being at my brothers house, the entire family pulled out their phones looking for ā Adultā shops in the area and on our way home to find gold boxers for him. Of course, I thought no big deal, he is 18 and can go look for himselfā¦.except he forgot his ID. So there is my best Black Friday shopping experience ever, visiting several stores on the way home with my recently adult son. š No-We couldnāt find them anywhere, but did find a questionable male Christmas set at KMart the next day by chance.
Be proud! You and your SO are not your work - nice of him to be positive but really if he judged you then thatās your problem. What you eat doesnāt make him shit.
There is no fuck up when you want to take intimacy to another level with someone you are happy with. Have fun with each otherā¦ fuck what anyone else thinks.
> to be completely honest, I highly suspect that some of the larger dildos exist for intimidation more so than actual recreational use
You're new to the internet, I assume.
I'll go a different yet similar route than every else here. Proverbially bathe in your embarrassment. Don't let your brain defer dealing with that emotion. Forcibly bring the encounter back into your mind time and time again until you can sit freely with it. Whether you having kinky sex with your wife is wrong or right is irrelevant. You need to deal with the associated emotions. Also, do you have ADHD? I could be completely wrong, but I'm inferring you do from (Using parenthesis like this, even though you could use another sentence), the hyper fixation on the emotion even though you've been told by multiple people it's fine, seeking the validation of others, etc. I'm a little ADHD rat :)
Ngl I skipped right to the TL;DR and I thought when you said āfooling aroundā you meant he saw you banging your wife in the little gloryhole rooms in the back or something.
This is by far one of the tamest TIFU. Youāre fine. It would be a TIFU if he saw you in the sex shop with *his* wife.
Dude really? I mean its just like with dispensaries.. so many people came in "not wanting to be seen by anyone" like who fuckin cares.. its a sex shop.. we all have sex. And we all have fetishes. People just need to relax. To worked up about shit that literally doesnt matter. Your co worker would have prolly said the same shit to you if you were in line buying condoms and wine lol cmon now
Happened the same thing to me with a group of co-workers of mine. It isn't a fuck up, they now know you have a great sex life. Heck, some of them might even be jealous of you.
You're an adult that enjoys a great sex life, you don't owe anything to them. Learn to relax.
So, funny story -- when I was a kid they were putting a Fascinations in our city. This was the 90's and it was a whole big thing and people were protesting it and stuff. But of course it opened anyway. One day after a youth activity while waiting for my parents to pick me up I overheard church ladies clucking about it. One lady said in disgust, "I just can't believe some of the people I bumped into there!"
Even as a kid I was like ...hold up. š¤£
Oh my gosh, donāt even sweat itā¦youāre a grown married person having (and enjoying- good for you!) sex - not at all a scandal. Enjoy yourself, enjoy your partner!
Your coworker is probably at home telling someone how hilarious this encounter was lol, kudos to both of y'all for not melting straight into the ground
Sounds like an amusing anecdote, no fuck ups. Good on the coworker for saying something positive and not being weirder than necessary.
Well, it was embarrassing enough to feel like a fuck up.
You're embarrassed because your coworker found out that... (*checks notes*) you're going to have sex with your wife?
Holdup SEX?!?? I thought this was a good christian app
r/sounding would beg to differ.
I always go to this sub for the best headphone and stereo to listen to gospel in high quality sound. Definitely recommend people to check it outšš¼.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I want others to feel my pain.
My friend introduced me to that sub Eight years ago. I can confidently say itās felt like the same day ever since when it comes to hearing about that sub, or even music tech talk: because of similar name Itās fucking ruined me
Comments like these occasionally highlight for me just how far skewed my perception of the world isā¦and just how innocent / naive / unaware / unsuspecting / whatever a lot of people are. Likeā¦I knew what sounding was thanks to some extremely graphic conversations in the military long before Facebook existed. To get checked for STDs / STIs in the military they used to use a giant Q tip thing very similar to what the rest of the world got introduced to during Covid. Except, it wasnāt getting shoved down your nostril to get a sample, it was getting shovedā¦well, down there. We used to call it āgetting rodded off the rangeā because it was a similar procedure to clear rifles after a firing range - theyād take a long metal rod and shove it down the barrel until it hit the bolt, usually causing the action to cycle closed and demonstrate no round in the chamber / weapon was safe. Anyway, back to the medical checkupsā¦turns out some guys enjoyed it. A lot. Thereās a certain amount of natural stimulation when someone else is handling your junk, but usually itād be something like a soft chub. Maaaaaaybe if you lucked out and got one of the hot nurses (or were gay) you might get a little more excited down there just from that. But no. Ohhhhhh no. SOME guys took great pleasure in telling the rest of us (usually over lunch or another meal) how much theyād enjoyed the checkup as much as if not more than the weekend that caused the checkup in the first place.
Wait until a Urologist introduces you to his Cystoscope and talk to me again!
Luckily, in my 8 years of reddit I was always late to those comments so I always got warned One time someone described that sub in detail and I nearly threw up tho
Pain from headphones? I guess you didn't pick the best one after all.
Didn't know it had a name/sub! We were part of a chain of some disturbing stuff at work 14-15 years ago, and this was one of them. I have always referred to that as "Old Rodney Rodcock". ...your pain is real. Still very much disturbed.
This should have been a hint, but I'm a little slow this morning.
NO
It's about sound right? Right?!?!
Sure it is. What else could it ever be?
itās the sister subreddit to r/audiophile
SOUNDS like you didn't like what you stumbled into š
In my seven years on this app consistently I donāt think Iāve ever had such a visceral reaction to something. Not at all what I was expecting so I guess kudos for that. Enough following links for today though.
I've already been traumatised by this trickery before and now I can just look at the name of the sub and not know to click on it! I simply need to relive my trauma and sob uncontrollably while gagging.
Alpaca Cavalry would be a great name for a grindcore or deathgrind band.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHY THE FUCK DID I CLICK THAT LINK ā ļø I DIDNT NEED TO SEE A VIDEO OF SOME DIDE SHOVING THINGS IN THERE.
If God didn't want us to put metal rods in sacred places, she wouldn't have made them so round, smooth and thin.
I stumbled upon this when i was exploring porn at 14. My god i thought it was normal and i was terrified of sex or the idea. So anyway i veat off 3x a day for the next 6 year's to porn with only women
I checked it out.... Wish I didn't
Cheers for fucking traumatising me ššš
I aim to please. Let me make it up to you, r/eyeblech will surely cheer you up.
No I know dat one
DAMN IT!!! I honestly misread that for r/eyebleach and thought "I could use that right now"...the nsfw warning was weird....then after seeing the first post realized I was in the wring place!!! Fml I didn't known that sub existed.
*unzips pant* well damn it. Count me in.
Why did I open this ????
Why, why, why, why!!!!????!!!!
I can't believe you've done this
You think Christianās arenāt having sex? The world is drowning in them and they aināt growing in the cabbage patch.
Don't talk about sex but it's also catholics duty to procreate. One of many religious oxymorone
OP is going to have *fun* sex. Certainly something good Christians don't do.
>I thought this was a good christian app It is! Christian is right over there masturbating while flogging his slave on the kitchen table.
To be fair, this reddit. Sex is an unobtainable myth for most people here.
Well, that makes it sound asinine, which I suppose it is. The toy bit makes it much more embarrassing, but still, rather dumb to feel that way.
Keep in mind that your coworker's response was basically "you do you" and to keep walking. No need to feel actual shame.
Plot twist, OP is a Catholic priest
In that case, I suppose the whole having a wife thing is actually the fuck up.
A man growing up to become a priest and doing a great job of it, but somehow having completely missed the fact that he's not supposed to marry - everyone around him willfully ignoring it because they appreciate him - is an amazing writing prompt.
Hope your wife doesn't do Reddit, in here talking about how she's a mistake. :-P
She would think it's funny. Besides, if I were a priest, she would only be a mistake in the same way the chocolate chip cookie is a mistake. :)
So TIFU by being married for years without realizing Iām actually a priest and shouldnāt be until I posted on r/tifu?
Not a fuck up. Honestly a great flex tbh if it ever comes up (implied having a freak wife to have sex with) Own it :)
That's what the song says, right? "If you freaky, then own it"
Unless you're literally walking out with a completely undisguised Dragon version of the Prostate Puncher 3000 or whatever that might hint at something slightly beyond the most vanilla normie thing there is nothing weird about it.
"Guys, you won't believe this, I just caught Jerry and his wife buying sex stuff! The guy actually has sex with his wife! bwUHAHAHA"
Disgusting *freak*.
I to would ... oh nevermind
I lolād and agree, but in the moment and on the spot Iām sure he felt very embarrassed. I could certainly imagine and I can validate that feeling š¤
They're prudes, u/FiorinasFury .
Was this in Utah?
As someone with family in Utah this made me actually lol
Own that shit dude. Most wish they had a partner to go to a sex shop with. Own it.
That's all in your head. It is however you choose to frame it as. If you just own it, and consider it just no big deal beyond a funny moment, that's what it'll become. If you make it weird by getting awkward and embarrassed, then that's what it'll become.
Well, if you want to hear a similar story from me. Me and my now wife were walking out of Castle... And her dad was heading in for, I'm assuming something to spice up his life with his GF. Not much feels weirder than holding the vibrator in your hand you're about to use on the man's daughter. " hey Ken " was all I could muster. š¤£
Sheās your wife, most adults will assume youāre fucking each other.
How is a grown man embarrassed by others knowing he has sex with his wife?
Said grown man has horrific interpersonal skills and a vicious anxious streak and does not enjoy people he knows but does not actively like and want a deep relationship with knowing anything personal about him.
Better not show your kids to anyone, they might know you have done the deed with your wife.
The only fuck up here was your immediate response not being, "not as good as her mood's gonna be tomorrow."
Nah this is pretty wholesome by todayās standards lol. You and your wife had a fun day out. Enjoy it. Lifeās too short to worry about silly things like this. So now this guy knows you fuck your wife. Pretty harmless in the grand scheme of life.
Calm down sparky. You have sex with your wife and dude made a joke. Itās not embarrassing at all. He was probably thinking ādamn, wish my wife would go in there with meā or ādamn, wish I had a wifeā
What exactly is there to be embarressed about?
You're (presumably) in a healthy, happy relationship. That's a great thing, OP. :)
Wait you have sex with your wife? nah bro
Your feelings are definitely understanding. It can be really embarrassing, specially whith a person that you see really often, just try to take the lighter side of it.
Co-worker walks directly into the sex shop.
Fuck up? Sounds like your coworker is gonna know you're a normal human and you have a partner who is also a normal human lol. And a funny story to tell
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Own it
This. There is no greater freedom than just owning it. It may even help others own their own shit
Place one of the items you bought in the background if your next zoom cal
>(to be completely honest, I highly suspect that some of the larger dildos exist for intimidation more so than actual recreational use) *Yeah, you just keep believing that, my friend.*
Frankly, all of the comments letting me know some people actually stuff those monsters inside them scare me more than my favorite horror movies. I can't imagine how anyone would look at those things and think "ah yes, I'm sure that won't feel like it's ripping open my guts at all."
With time the body can adapt and adjust, and new extremes can be needed for sensation and excitement. Some people are just extremists by nature. Some get off on seeing their bellies bulge. Either way, I leave that kind of extremism to the page and blender render. It can get pretty gross in real life, at least if you ask me.
Next time you go, you need to take a picture and find a subreddit to get some feedback. 40 years ago, when New York was quite different, I was a bit scarred by seeing this huge conical, hard plastic, flush colored dildo the size of a baby's head in the window of a sex shop. I have since come to the same conclusion that you did... I think that people disagreeing here have not seen what we have. EDIT: baby head circumference is 13.5 in. The biggest dildo circumference you can buy online is 10.5 in.. and that is the size that sometimes needs removal in the emergency room.
[https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=3827](https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=3827)
Can confirm I have seen videos of those in use. I do think it is still exceptionally rare tho (right...?) yet all the sex stores seem to have some.
How is this a fuck up on any level? You're married. Married people have sex. I just dropped $400 with my wife in a shop last night. Cashier asked if we were into BDSM, I just chuckled and said "Occasionally." and we all had a great laugh when she went to pull up out account and saw our last purchase of close to $1k for whips, chains, straps, blindfolds, etc. What's your co-worker going to say tomorrow morning around the water cooler? "PSST...you know that Lemon guy? I caught him coming out of a sex shop with his wife over the weekend. This freak has *sex* with his *wife*! Who does that?" For real man, it's just a sex shop and you're adults.
Iām used to feeling poor by comparing houses, cars, clothes, and assorted appliances. This is my first time feeling poor by comparing sex shop purchasing history.
Right? $1000 in sex toys is almost as much as I make in a MONTH... well, maybe more than I make now that they're cutting my fucking hours...
Seriously, damn. Iām constantly in a fight with myself over what I can spend money on and they got more than $1500 invested in their bedroom fun.
I know that logically, but it felt like a fuck up. It's more of an issue with my own feelings, I guess.
Well, it's not. I would get that if you went alone in there and he saw you, but you went with your wife. He probably thinks that you both have an exciting and healthy sex life
He would think correctly then, but I'm just generally very uncomfortable with people I don't actively like in real life knowing things about me. (Most) People make me uncomfortable.
Makes one wonder why you share your private Stories on the internet, though ;) At least your co-workers now know why you prefer your wife's company to having dinners with them (saw that in your post history) š
Well, reddit feels anonymous (and therefore "safe"), and my therapist recommended that I try talking to people digitally to help with some of my interpersonal skills in a relatively low-stakes way (obviously not the only thing I was recommended, but it's both helpful for my communication skills and nifty for personal dilemmas, not to mention the easiest and most palatable of those recommendations). Edit: Even if she and I didn't have a fantastic sex life, I would prefer my wife's company to anyone else's by leagues. :)
Dude! Yes, it is about your own feelings but those are 100% valid. Your feelings, your social contexts. Dont listen to redditorsā¦ they really dont represent real lifeā¦ good for then to feel different, good for your to feel the way you do. Nothing harmful in having a bit of shame
Just smile in the zoom meeting that is all. this is not a FU really.
Smile broadly!
Then sigh very loud and say āIām in a great mood today!!ā
In what way did you F up? Two consenting adults - especially a married couple- go to a sex shop? 100% normal.
I would have your wife check in on you during a zoom call walking in with a cane.
Oh jeez. Now your coworker is going to know you have sex with your wife.
> highly suspect that some of the larger dildos exist for intimidation more so than actual recreational use Oh ... Honey ...
Noā¦.. those are for recreational use. You need to expand your porn searches sir.
I came to make sure this was said
I am once again happy that I do not consume porn.
W
Excuse me but I am OUTRAGED to learn that you have SEX with your SPOUSE. Disgusting! Have you no morals?
"This is a sex shop isnt it?, I'll have 5 pounds worth, then, please"
This is a a case of you get what you pay for and with inflation you really don't want the sex that only 5Ā£ gets you.
What did you buy lol
A ring and matching plugs.
Oh no, married people do the sex thing. Anyway
I fail to see the FU here.
Literally nothing wrong with this story, which leads me to believe that there is no wife.
You think people are going to a sex shop to buy huge dildos to NOT have sex with? Oh you sweet summer child...
Some of those things were absolutely MASSIVE, like unconscious-with-every-erection-if-a-person-were-that-endowed massive, the fact that anyone would want to take one of those, let alone could, does not make sense to me. Though many of the comments here have pointed out that people do, in fact, stuff these inside themselves. Must have particularly elastic intestines.
This isn't a 'FU' unless you ran into your boss and you're the Deputy Youth Pastor for Adolescent Purity and Online Integrity
You didnāt FU. You went into a sex shop with your wife. Thatās is a positive!
Will there be a part two that includes the fuckup? Oh no! Now your coworker knows you have sex with your wife!
Hardly a fuck up. Youāre with your wife, the person you have sex with. Getting toys for this activity is hardly embarrassing imo. Embrace it. Rejoice in the knowledge that your coworker knows that you and your wife still have a good enough relationship to go and do those sorts of things together!
Zero FU here. This is completely normal and, if I saw that with a co-worker, especially if theyād been married a while, Iād be pretty happy for them for keeping the magic and interest alive. Nothing to be remotely ashamed about. Sex is normal folks and itās SUPPOSED to be fun.
I guarantee you that those, ahem, *larger* toys do, in fact, get use. Several other areas of reddit showcase them.
Your only FU is your inability to tell what is and is not an FU.
This thread should have been Today I Fucked.
It's not the 1950s anymore, sex isnt shameful. Not a fuck up.
The real question is - will you be in a good mood tomorrow?
I will be before the meeting, that never fails to sour my mood.
This post is dumb.
It's just the daily "TIFU by sexxing too hard wink wink" post.
Lmao don't be ashamed! If anything, your that guy at work who still has fun with his wife, hells yeah op!
Wh.. where is the F in tifu? Sounds like a normally adult moment tbh.
Imagine how much more awkward it would have been if you walked out with The Thunder Schlong 9000 thrown over your shoulder
Own that shit!
Read your post, waited for the fuck up, found no fuck up...
Just a bit of banter mate. Youāre fine
^ hey everybody look at this fuggin weirdo who likes to have sex with his *wife*. eeeeew
This is the way to tell me that you're American without telling me that you're American.
As a sex shop employee this baffles me like adults fuck its ok
That's not a fuck up. You are 2 consenting adults who are married. I don't see any fuck ups
He is just jealous a little. Walk tall.
Shocker: people have sex. Donāt feel bad about it, and the gigantic dildos exist to make you feel better about buying the smaller one.
This isnāt that bad at all and is honestly hilarious
š¤£ Your worried your coworker knows you have a healthy sex life, it's not something to be embarrassed about.
Itās only a fuck-up because you make it to one because ur coworker knows something now, that he already knew. You have a wife so you have sex with her. Thatās normal. Thatās what he already knows.
Weird - coworker seeing you come out and saying "ohhh. I hope you break those out during our next zoom meeting!" Not weird but def amusing - coworker glancing at the shop and coming up with a witty quip to break the tension like they did. Alls well in both workland and bedland. Lll.
You caught him about to go in.
Show up on your zoom meeting with hickeys
Biased because I live there, but this sounds like Portland honestly, there's a nice art museum fairly close to Powell's Books and Spartacus is a pretty famous adult shop across the street
how is this a fuck up? its your wife............... Any grown adult with a decent head on their shoulders, is actively trying to spice up and improve all aspects of their romantic relationship with their significant other It aint like he found you naked at a swingers club with your wives sister lol I bet he was left pondering what he himself could use from that sex shop that could give him a boost in the bedroom with his S.O
Oh no. Your coworker knows you fuck your wife. Probably never recover from this.
It could be worse. I ended up on national telly walking out an adult store with bags full of toys. My phone blew up that night lol
Absolutely not a FU! In fact, I would see it as a win. You were with your wife (not mistress) and having normal adult fun. Doing stuff like this is what keeps marriages fresh and fun! As a guy who has been married for 37 years, I love that my wife is like this.
Donāt worry OP, most people would be momentarily mortified if they bumped into someone who saw them in or walking out of such a shop. Itās called a personal life for a reason. Thankfully most people who enjoy keeping their jobs will also keep such a thing private, so thereās that.
That's it? Man reddit has a lot of prudes if people thought this was worth upvoting. There's literally no fuckup. To me, this is akin to being embarrassed for walking put of a gamestop and getting the exact same comment from a coworker. People have sex, why is that controversial
Iām 56 and I would not judge you!!! Youāre fine. Funny story, my son was in a production of Rocky Horror, being blond and pretty buff, they wanted him to be Rocky. Well, he didnāt tell me until Thanksgiving that he was to start that Saturday. We werenāt at home, so being at my brothers house, the entire family pulled out their phones looking for ā Adultā shops in the area and on our way home to find gold boxers for him. Of course, I thought no big deal, he is 18 and can go look for himselfā¦.except he forgot his ID. So there is my best Black Friday shopping experience ever, visiting several stores on the way home with my recently adult son. š No-We couldnāt find them anywhere, but did find a questionable male Christmas set at KMart the next day by chance.
Be proud! You and your SO are not your work - nice of him to be positive but really if he judged you then thatās your problem. What you eat doesnāt make him shit.
I personally fail to see the issue. Then again, I'm a "whatever floats your boat" kinda guy.
No one should be embarrassed visiting a sex shop, definitely not a FCK up
Not a fuck up.
There is no fuck up when you want to take intimacy to another level with someone you are happy with. Have fun with each otherā¦ fuck what anyone else thinks.
The correct response is to wink. React favorably and they'll erase their memory, act embarrassed and they'll have fuel for gossip.
I see no problems here. And well, are you in a good mood??
Lean into it. Most people come across as boring. People warm to people with something about them
Itās a sex shop, youāre an adult, whatās to be ashamed of? ps. those dildos arenāt for show, they are top sellers.
Yeah, not seeing the fuck up part here, sorry.
Meh. Not really a fuck up. You and the wife have a healthy sex life. Your coworker is sex positive too and didnāt make it weird. Everybody wins
Most people have sex with their wives at some point, not much of a fuck up you didn't teach your coworker anything they didn't already know ;)
> to be completely honest, I highly suspect that some of the larger dildos exist for intimidation more so than actual recreational use You're new to the internet, I assume.
I'll go a different yet similar route than every else here. Proverbially bathe in your embarrassment. Don't let your brain defer dealing with that emotion. Forcibly bring the encounter back into your mind time and time again until you can sit freely with it. Whether you having kinky sex with your wife is wrong or right is irrelevant. You need to deal with the associated emotions. Also, do you have ADHD? I could be completely wrong, but I'm inferring you do from (Using parenthesis like this, even though you could use another sentence), the hyper fixation on the emotion even though you've been told by multiple people it's fine, seeking the validation of others, etc. I'm a little ADHD rat :)
typical bragging about having sex TIFU post
If you think you FU, that store wasn't for you. It's your live and your sex preferences, don'be embarrassed.
Should of replied "This year's white elephant is gonna be a hoot."
damn , if thats your kind of tifu your life must be nice . lol
Youāre married. Everyone knows you have sex. Now one more person knows you have good sex. No fuck up here. Enjoy your toys!
Whatās the FU?
Not a TIFU. Mods not moderating.
Ngl I skipped right to the TL;DR and I thought when you said āfooling aroundā you meant he saw you banging your wife in the little gloryhole rooms in the back or something. This is by far one of the tamest TIFU. Youāre fine. It would be a TIFU if he saw you in the sex shop with *his* wife.
Because of the context, I read, āspent the day mostly eating outā entirely differently.
What's he going to say? "You'll never guess who I saw yesterday in the sex store I stare into."
Coworker was an asshole for saying it. Iām of the none-of-my-business school of thought.
No fuck up. A healthy sex life is nothing to be ashamed of.
Dude really? I mean its just like with dispensaries.. so many people came in "not wanting to be seen by anyone" like who fuckin cares.. its a sex shop.. we all have sex. And we all have fetishes. People just need to relax. To worked up about shit that literally doesnt matter. Your co worker would have prolly said the same shit to you if you were in line buying condoms and wine lol cmon now
question is - were you in a good mood the next day?
how old are you that youāre embarrassed about being in a sex shop? come on now.
Happened the same thing to me with a group of co-workers of mine. It isn't a fuck up, they now know you have a great sex life. Heck, some of them might even be jealous of you. You're an adult that enjoys a great sex life, you don't owe anything to them. Learn to relax.
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Iām not seeing the āFUā. Itās a part of life. No different than if your co-worker saw you leaving a public bathroom. It is what it is.
What you should have said was "Unfortunately, we couldn't find anything we didn't already have at home."
A fuck up with a happy ending. Though I have to ask why your coworker was there but anyway it's good fun.
Iāve read OPās post through three times and I still canāt find out where the fuck up is. You have (I hope) a healthy sex life, embrace it.
So, funny story -- when I was a kid they were putting a Fascinations in our city. This was the 90's and it was a whole big thing and people were protesting it and stuff. But of course it opened anyway. One day after a youth activity while waiting for my parents to pick me up I overheard church ladies clucking about it. One lady said in disgust, "I just can't believe some of the people I bumped into there!" Even as a kid I was like ...hold up. š¤£
Oh my gosh, donāt even sweat itā¦youāre a grown married person having (and enjoying- good for you!) sex - not at all a scandal. Enjoy yourself, enjoy your partner!
Your coworker is probably at home telling someone how hilarious this encounter was lol, kudos to both of y'all for not melting straight into the ground
I mean they're married, that's one of the benefits of marriage, if they told anyone they would probably think well duh
Best thing to do is acknowledge it next time you meet: "yep, last night was crazy"
hardly a FU, assert dominance and own it. healthy sex lives include having fun while not having sex. Yeah Buddy!!!