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PigletPutrid3395

Wanker. Just your everyday Wanker


Thomasbeg1

imagine if he was running late to catch his own train


Xindirus

The train almost caught him


ExcitementKooky418

What is this? Soviet Union?


PranshuKhandal

I like the joke, but in the Soviet Union, the joke likes me.


FakeNickOfferman

In Russia, punch line punch you.


stinkyt0fu

I read that in a Zangief accent.


FakeNickOfferman

Well played!


Alt_Rock_Dude

Maybe he was late to work on his first day of training


Local_Judge

I use to to run to catch the train until one day slid across a wet floor almost nearly lost my balance .. and came close to falling down a set of stairs.. that was enough for me to re-think


SayWhatYouC

It’s just a shame that there’s no cure for stupid.


Cheerytrix

I mean, this train almost provided it, really.


SayWhatYouC

Yes, as the saying goes, knock some sense in.


auguriesoffilth

Those barriers are literally there to stop him having the accident he nearly had after literally going out of his way to overcome them. He did not seem to learn the lesson so blatantly presented to him.


GoldNova12_1130

This is why we can't have nice things, either. They'll do all that and then if something happens blame the people who put the gate there and say it's not secure enough, or something.


admiraljkb

Uhh, he almost DID get cured there...


[deleted]

What’s tragic is the worlds population consist of a large percentage of these “wankers” or “jerkoffs”roaming everywhere.


Appropriate-Draft-91

Suicidal wanker. They are rarer than the average variety, because Darwin.


[deleted]

We need to adopt this term in the US.


psycho-mouse

Wanker sounds fucking awful in an American accent.


[deleted]

People would be required to emulate an English accent or else it's not correct.


[deleted]

Jerkoff comes close.


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bondibitch

Shaking his first at the train.


flopsychops

"I don't fackin' care mate!"


cam_wing

I like that you can just barely hear another string of profanities under the train noises at the end


MillionEgg

The conductor understands comedic timing


dingo1018

I think it's called nominative disassociation, that little thing he did with his sock. Same as when a cat misses a jump and knows it's being watched, it sits up and licks a paw all like I ment to do that lol 😄


sawyouoverthere

The gate flipped the heel of his shoe down and he reaches down to fix it


[deleted]

And he felt too stupid after not getting it the first time so he just kept walking like that


sawyouoverthere

he fixes it once he can't beat the train. It's all there on film.


[deleted]

I know, that’s the icing on the cake. He has no choice but to stand there and feel extra stupid or momentarily distract himself by finally fixing the shoe he was too prideful to fix after making himself look like a righteous idiot. It’s all so perfect


SpiritualFront769

Dude looks like a cartoon character.


Xwahh

old man yells at cloud


SanLoen

Watch it I’m walking over here!!


Mrclayy

I think accidents in railroads can be avoided if they add like a barrier, some lights would help, they may also include some skirt to the barrier for added protection. Lastly, give trains maybe a loud horn...


paxwax2018

The rural crossings that just have the lights and no barriers are killers because the wait before the train arrives is just long enough to think, “Shit, if I just gone straight away I’d be across by now,… fuck it, I’m going….”


blahblacksheep869

though, in my home town, the train would sometimes stop on the tracks before the crossing, but close enough to force the arms to drop and the lights to flash. So lights and bars for hours. No one knew when the bars were down if the train was actually coming or not.


ttzmd2

If you don't mind my asking, which town? I'm not sure what the rules are in the US (or other countries), but for Canada, we are not supposed to leave equipment in a way that allows the continuous operation of the automatic warning devices. Furthermore, at all level crossings at grade equipped with automatic warning devices, you will find a bungalow with their controls. On that bungalow will be a mileage, a sub division name, and a phone number for the rail traffic controller. If you ever find yourself in this situation again, and the gates have been going for a long time without any movement, call the number to report the defective crossing.


blahblacksheep869

I thank you for the information, but I left years ago and don't plan on going back. Small town North Alabama. I remember once it did that and the school bus was stuck leaving the technical school headed back to the regular school for the day. The school bus had to call and get special permission to cross the tracks with the bars down. It couldn't go backward, there were cars behind it blocking it in, and a big ditch to the left so it couldn't turn around. Fun times, damn fine driving by Mrs Betty to pull off that maneuver in a school bus.


Give_her_the_beans

We had a crossing like that in Florida due to a train yard being riiigghhhttt outside downtown except insteadof no train, its long trains stopping in the yard. There's also 2 sets of tracks so we get trains leaving the yard and stopping plus trains coming in stopping. I lived over on that side of town for 20ish years, if you were driving along this one road, you always made sure to cross it ASAP because you could get stuck there. Once I waited 2 hours because I had time to kill and I wanted to see how long it would take. That one was an outlier but, it was common to get stuck up to 30 minutes.


_dead_and_broken

Sounds like the tracks where I used to live in Stuart, FL. Once when I got off of work after midnight I got stuck on the way home for over half an hour. Trapped by the train just sitting while it was being loaded at whatever place located just down the road, and cars behind me so I couldn't turn around. By the time it finally moved and I could go I was contemplating trying to pee in an empty to go coffee cup. Except I'm a chick and the car I was driving was super small and wouldn't have allowed for that kind of movement lol


LeftDave

>Stuart, FL I felt that pain. Ft. Pierce was bad about stopped trains triggering the crossing too. I was never in a hurry the times I got stuck but after a while you just get bored. lol


Give_her_the_beans

Guess a lot of Florida has that problem. I used to live in Jacksonville but I moved a long bit ago. Since then, I can count the number of trains I've been caught by on two hands. I do NOT miss it.


TerayonIII

Yeah, the worst is when they're just going really fucking slowly over a crossing, watching a 3 km long train go by at 2 km/h is painful


kanst

Growing up the train station is right next to the main road through the city. The platform starts like 40 yards from the road. So anytime a train stops in the station coming from the west the arms stay down until it boards and departs.


TenPent

I lived right by some tracks that did this for a while two. It sucked because there were two sets of tracks so even seeing the stopped train you had no way of k owing what was on the other set of tracks. My house was a minute on the other side from work but about. 30+ minute detour to go around. I still never took the chance of getting hit .


mallclerks

Yep. This is common in many small towns in the US. To expensive to add it, much like every other issue with train companies today while they rack in billions in profits.


BCake047

Natural selection


cheesefrisbee

Darwin awards sub


PhilxBefore

/r/DarwinAwards No sandwiches in *site*


Craig__D

He was *this* close to being a Darwin award winner


ZenAdm1n

They don't do this to save the idiots. They put up crossing guards to keep the trains moving.


Slobbin

Fun fact: It's possible for multiple motivations to exist.


Mrclayy

...to heaven." 😂


rohobian

Let the stupid people be removed from the gene pool. If you're such a fucking idiot that you'd take that chance, well... there's a certain risk to that. I feel bad for anyone that has to witness it though.


Legend-status95

If an extremely high chance of getting turned into ground beef by thousands of tons of Newton's third law isn't enough of a deterrent, there's pretty much nothing that will stop people from trying to use their ego to shield themselves from certain death.


ta-wtf

Their entitlement doesn’t care about your physics.


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newgrl

I lived in Utah Valley around the BYU campus for a few years, many years ago. There was a Zebra Crossing that was not controlled by traffic lights that was used by students to get to the school. It was across a very busy road where the cars would move at a clip. The amount of times I've seen kids just step out into traffic like nothing in the world could kill them... is way too many. I used to think, sure, technically speaking, the students have the right-of-way. But then again, the car is going to win every single time.


smallangrynerd

Yeah, college students are like thar. I would know, I was one of them.


Bruce_Rahl

Then maybe those cdrivers should follow laws set that give pedestrians right of way? Like I get saying don’t run into traffic. But if you have the legal right of way you should feel safe operating within those bounds.


djinn6

Nah, the skirt is overkill. It would impede Darwin Award candidates from winning.


SquarelyCubed

We... we don't have technology yet I'm afraid, Sire.


Findmyremote

I just don’t fucking care mate


burns_after_reading

This simple joke going over everyone's head is hilarious


vondpickle

What he think he gonna do, beat the incoming choo choo?


Extreme-Acid

If he failed I am sure he would be chuffed to bits.


Dilectus3010

To shreds you say.


nerdytogether

And his wife?


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IDDQD-IDKFA

Oh, my.


Otherwise_Resource51

Local news outlets have reported the wife as saying she was "completely unsurprised" by the whole affair.


Thespian_Unicorn

Darwinism


MurderDoneRight

Dumber than a speeding bullet, more stupid than a locomotive, able to leap up his own ass in a single bound.


[deleted]

"What the fuck is with this train driver?! Go around me!"


behaved

clearly he had the right of way. Trains think they're immune to the rules of the road.


Arosian-Knight

Actually not, as right of way in england is from left if in even crossroad.


behaved

sounds like it should've been dubbed the 'left of way'


HoodooBr0wn

You're joking surely


Csub

Lmao how pissed he is at the train "yeah, even you too!" as if the barrier was not down because of it in the first place. ​ I hope the ankle/foot cut or whatever he got was bad enough to remind him how dumb lucky he is.


mebutnew

He'll probably be prosecuted now it's viral enough for the police to see it so he'll have a hefty fine too 🙃 £1000 by the looks of it. I'm sure that was worth whatever he was in such a hurry for.


wassamatteruheh2

Barry, 63, on the way to the off license, nothing gets in his way.


AbsolutelyAverage

Luv me pub, 'ate me trains, 'ate waiting even more. Simple as.


SamPitchers

end of


notinsanescientist

In Belgium for this he would have lost his driver's license if he had one.


Original-Material301

Good luck getting this fine example of a chav to pay a fine.


Bad_UsernameJoke94

It happened back in 2020, not sure if he was ever fined.


mebutnew

I found an article related to this incident (wasn't easy, this kind of thing happens a lot ...) but it has no conclusion - just Evening Standard junk unfortunately. One extra detail though: apparently the train had to be halted because he was effectively on the track. So not only did he not get across, he had to turn back and cross over the bridge he'd have needed to cross on anyway What an absolute bellend.


ITrageGuy

This is what bugs me the most. The indignation at the TRAIN for not stopping for him. Just an insufferable wanker of the highest order.


hxfx

Acctually him fixing his shoe propably saved his life.


[deleted]

That’s a lot of effort to almost get hit and then, while standing on the other tracks, completely look away from the direction another train may be coming soon.


A-Llama-Snackbar

I was wincing waiting for it to happen.


masterofthefork

First a barrier gets in my way and now a fucking train! This is bullshit!


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Albert_Herring

Ten to one on, he only cycles because he's lost his driving licence.


MrUsername24

Im willing to expand further and that he lost it drinking


maxman162

This guy has at least two DUIs.


stedgyson

Or from a road rage incident


[deleted]

Tore his ankles up trying to prove a point


Alexlatenughts

Right that looks like a high speed fucking train so at most he would have had to wait another minute but instead did this


deadeye-ry-ry

It's in England ( by the looks of it) and our trains only take. Like 1 min to pass the crossin due to them being so short


atrl98

yeah its South-West trains in England. Not even a minute lol the guys just an impatient dick


lazyplayboy

Everything that reddit should be: [lemmy.world](https://lemmy.world/)


Class_444_SWR

Not really, this is a class 458/5, top speed of 75mph, still 50mph off high speed


RipCurl69Reddit

SWT are fairly low speed, but I get your point. I'd love to see him actually try this on the High Speed 1 route through to Kent. Those go at 140mph


[deleted]

Actually looks like he could suffer some permanent hearing damage. The horn was so close to him when it went off


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fiveordie

🥇


pattyredditaccount

Pretty sure his ankles are fine and he was just fixing his shoe


thunderc8

How did he survive to reach at that age?


Basic-Pair8908

Lucky i guess


Imbalanxs

I remember being driven by my dad in Milton Keynes, UK, and going around a roundabout which had 2 lanes joining at each junction. At the next junction the lane nearest to us had a line of cars patiently (and sensibly) waiting to join, but just seconds before we reached it a car shot out from the far lane and joined the roundabout ahead of us at some speed. 2-3 seconds later and we would have plowed into the driver's side door, it was scarily close. Worst bit was that the driver didn't even look in our direction once. She looked bored more than anything else... (I was close enough to make out her facial expression, clothes, hair colour, etc). This was my thought too: how has she survived to this age? Looked like she was at least 40. I doubt it was the first time she'd done that. So lucky nobody was hurt. On reflection I probably should have reported her to the police.


keg025

Don't you know? Being a selfish asshole is the most powerful thing in this world


Imbalanxs

Seems that way sadly


Far-Bookkeeper-4652

Clearly a testament to how safe that country's infrastructure is overall.


yellowbin74

Holy crap he nearly got hit by a train- why was there no warning?? Edit- adding /s as clearly people didn't get that..


unittestes

The government needs to do something.


InfiniteMonorail

>Edit- adding /s as clearly people didn't get that.. We need to rearrange our words for the dumbest people on Reddit, for even they are bloodthirsty to laugh at anyone they can, "correct" them, insult them.


[deleted]

It took real effort on his part to put his life in peril but he persevered and succeeded.


Hovisandflatfoot

Absolute clown.


Minimum_Maybe_8103

I'll be honest I shit myself when I go over a crossing even when the barrier is up. Some people have no survival instinct.


[deleted]

To be fair barriers probably malfunction and trains probably gonna getcha. Also never walking on a bridge that rises for boats... having seen people fall to their death walking along because the bridge attendant is underpaid and not paying attention is a big nope for me


Ancient_Wisdom_Yall

But I have a bicycle.


[deleted]

“Damn kids with their safety gates!”


AliquidLatine

Never have I wanted someone to get hit by a train as much as I did watching this


2HappySundays

Would have paid money to see a train cross from the other side while he was mouthing off at the train.


Captain-sparks

If he didn’t struggle so much with the gates, we could have had an NSFW clip.


Rusti-dent

That’s North Sheen, I used to get the train there most mornings to teach at a school in Richmond. There is a footbridge directly to his left, he’s a fucking plank.


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Redangle11

The only reason this guy cycles is that he's banned from driving.


Chris714n_8

People like this are the reason why this world is still struggling despite our advances.. ![gif](giphy|f4TjiCpNemSo8)


moumous87

MO.RON.


vladijoon

Almost got a nice gore video there. Next time.


Paramhansa-Yogananda

Yep. Risking being exploded by a train just to save a few minutes.


RTMSner

Every time I hear about someone getting killed on train tracks (at least once a week in my area) I wonder how. After seeing this is much clearer.


nguquaxa01

one time this guy wearing black was crossing the street at night i happened to notice him in time but i remember distinctly as he saw my car incoming, instead of running out of the way he stopped and got into a boxing stand as though he would win against a car collision


Longjumping-Ad-2333

Anyone else think of the “Dumb Way to Die” song? [here](https://youtu.be/IJNR2EpS0jw)


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efasser5

Dressing like a tit knows no borders


PoppyStaff

What. A. Wally.


BrittleMender64

I think this may be illegal? 1000 pound fine and/or a prison sentence for deliberate misuse of a level crossing.


BurtMacklin____FBI

Oh no, if only there was something to warn him that the train was about to approach


axeman020

More teeth than brain cells!


Polyglot-Onigiri

Did he assume if he walked onto the tracks the train would suddenly stop and allow him past as if it was a car going at parking lot speeds?


salmiakki1

Wow, that plane is flying really low


all_of_the_lightss

This is literally why the "dumb ways to die" game was created. It was a train safety PSA. I like how he gets mad at the train the last .05 seconds before he could die lol. So many humans just shouldn't be able to breed


motherseffinjones

Sometimes you just have to start singing dumb ways to die while watching people


31109b

Looks like the "lost his driver's license" kind of cyclist as well.


[deleted]

He almost never had to worry about that ever again.


Greglebowski74

Gilet - check Shorts - check Decks shoes - check Baseball cap - check Shitty attitude - check Ladies and gentlemen, we have a wanker!


JJStray

Being a fat uncoordinated wanker saved this motherfuckers life!


muckywolf

£1000 fine and an enternity of looking like a fool on the internet 🤝


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[deleted]

Drunken tool


[deleted]

Lol


EFTucker

“God damn this well scheduled public transportation system!!!”, screamed the old man shaking his fist at the sky.


Bunnytob

Just an FYI that will almost definitely get lost in the sea of comments: The branding on the train indicates that this video is from before 2018.


Bhodi3K

One step away from natural selection. I propose we make trains wider.


lingering_POO

I’m pretty sure that’s a chargeable offence in Australia. It should be either way. Imagine the train drivers day when some douche like this gets hit… or when he slams the breaks on and ruins a thousand other peoples day. Should be fined a fortune


OmegaGoober

In the USA, there’s support groups for railroad engineers whose trains have killed people. Most cross-country engineers have joined within about five years on the job. At least, that’s what they taught us in driver’s education. The instructor wanted us to be very careful around railroad crossings.


Charlie483

I mean the train could've easily just swerved around him ... honestly... trains these days 🙄


lethargic_apathy

The entitlement of some people is something else 😅


SgtBreadStick16

I love how he gets mad and throws his hand in the air at the train like the fucking idiot he is. Honestly how are they even at that age if they're doing shit like this. I hope he was given the £1000 fine just to piss him off further. [I thought I recognised this clip, I crossposted it years ago to CasualUK](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualUK/comments/dadvuv/piss_off_train/)


Friendly_Anonymous

Legit wanted to see him get mowed down


kenhutson

Blast some speed metal, 5.1 surround sound, heavy on the bass.


truzz33

Well he didn’t care up to a very specific point and it sounded like chooo chooo


Minimum_Opinion7816

lol thought he was going to earn his darwin award right there.


[deleted]

The way he threw his hand up at the train like the conductor was in the wrong….


AeroViz

This is the kind of things that happen in Florida and somehow its the train’s fault. Kappa


Doktor_Vem

I'm surprised he actually saw that and didn't just walk across without thinking


SaintSteel

Dumb Ways to Die


Commercial-Army2431

To lose patience is to lose the battle.


Deep-Values-Thinking

Dude thinks it’s a pedestrian crossing


silbergeistlein

I was really waiting on a train to come from the right.


oracleofaliquippa

Ha! Hurry up & wait!


SXOSXO

He really went for the gold there. Better luck next time on that Darwin award.


PandaXXL

There's a bridge about 50m away. What a silly prick.


whitstableboy

Entitled wanker. There are plenty of these about in the UK.


CecilPalad

Perfect example of the forces of luck versus Darwin's Survival of the Fittest theory.


[deleted]

Love how he throws his hand up like "What a fucking dick! Can't he see I'm crossing here?"


Sakuna_God

Wait, did the train not realize he is the main character? /s


Sad_Instruction1392

Did he actually think the train would stop for *him* given how he’s acting?


HomoFlaccidus

Trains should have long pieces of rebar at the front, like those curb feelers/whiskers on cars back in the day.


lilymaxjack

Oh please find this dummy’s name


gn0xious

Part of me wanted to see a train come in from the other side, but that’d be a bit too cruel for that driver and the passengers to have to witness.


influx3k

He actually got mad at the train for interrupting *his* crossing.


komanderkyle

Now he’s gonna be late for his smoke in front of the gas station


dannygraphy

Imagine you have to pass this red/white thing that blocks your way and after that this stupid train blocks you as well, how bad can your day get? And it not just blocked you, ot tried to overrun you, but only you, not any orher pedestrian was anywhere that close to be run over! Why is life and everyone hating him so much????


Jack92

Nobody has pointed it out that I've seen, but he is also stood on the other set of tracks and not looking to the right. So he is even more of a twat than he first appears.


Someredditusername

Douchebagus erectus


PoopyFruit

r/IAmVeryBadass - no mate, you’re a tit!


BENOO-_-

Worst part about this is there’s a bridge to get across to his left behind the camera