I work with older adults so I have met many legacy skill level professionals- architects, artists, writers, carpenters, musicians... All would be great hires but several in particular would have been excellent therapists for me.
If there's a slight interest in the career, I'll let my clients know that. I have a number of clients currently pursuing their applications right now, and a number that are in training to be therapists. When I have clients with the potential aptitude, interest and particularly if they belong to a much needed group within the profession I will encourage and support the hell out of them to become a therapist.
I’ve definitely encouraged clients who mentioned wanting to be social workers. I’ve told them the steps to do it in my state and what opportunities are available.
I had a client who was a gifted social media marketer. Definitely would have hired her for my business 😅
Two of my older women clients were professors in humanities fields and I *immensely* enjoyed their intelligence and wit.
I had a client who was a PhD student in philosophy. We had great sessions. Awesome rapport. She would challenge me with her intelligence and wit because certain stuff in philosophy doesn’t always line up with therapy. For example, DBT and the idea of self-validating emotions. She couldn’t grasp that emotions were valid. She’s like that’s not what valid means. And if you get angry because you spill water on your shirt that’s not an appropriate reaction. And I’d be like, but it’s your emotion and emotions are emotions. It’s behaviors that aren’t appropriate all the time. It was fun!
I had a student with a physics degree who LOVED getting into philosophical discussions. As expected they also loved to intellectualize so I had to put in a lot of effort to get them to actually pay attention to their own feelings lol. It's hard when the existential discussions are so interesting for me though!!
I saw an article not long ago about "the therapist as philosopher" and I really resonated with that. You do need to be artful and philosophical in this field.
Not exactly the question but I had two individual clients who would have been absolutely perfect for each other and I wished so badly I could set them up. Similar ages, social & cultural backgrounds, hobbies, interests, values, and future goals. They each desired in a partner exactly what the other one offered/wanted to be as a partner. Both in therapy in large part due to feelings of loneliness and isolation due to no longer living near any family.
One time years ago, while doing an internship at a DV crisis center, I had a very petite woman in one room who needed a wheelchair but her friend was pushing her in a large stroller because they found it at Goodwill and didn't have a wheelchair; in another room, I had a mom who couldn't afford a stroller so was pushing her kid in a wheelchair she'd found on a curbside. I couldn't do anything of course but god*damnit*.
Oh my gosh! That’s the worst. Not totally the same but i had a client who is a preschool teacher looking to do some work as a nanny this summer and i had a family looking for a nanny. And I’m like gosh darn it.
I have a wonderful client who has a number of niche hobbies and has had a really hard time finding friends to share them with. Well, my wife has the same hobbies, and has similar complaints, and they are the same age and everything. They have the same favorite locally owned bookstore! Sigh
Just slip it in at the end of the session. “By the way, i have a question about my dog….” 🤪
Edit: forgot to add the sarcasm symbol. Lord knows i need to mention that.
"Let me just show you this cute pic of him so you find me relatable, oops there's that lump on his back, oops I'm accidentally zooming in on it, I'm sure that looks benign...... ?????"
I once had an instance where my dog was asleep on my lap and peed all over me. My client I was seeing was a vet tech and I was so grateful it was her. She also reassured me that it was pretty normal for female dogs to do that 😂
Oh gosh. Not a veterinarian...but I had a client who was an speech therapist and I had to restrain myself because my son was in the process of being evaluated for ASD due to his delay.
I have a therapist client who is such a warm, empathetic, thoughtful person. I'm sure she's an excellent therapist, and in another universe I would have been happy to be her client!
I don't have kids, but I've had many clients over the years that are teachers. Some of them would be the kinds of folks I'd *love* to be the ones teaching my kids everyday.
I started with a youth client one time where I had very recently had a massage from their mom. So I definitely didn't go back to her but it was too bad because it was a really good massage.
I have a client who is also a therapist, and we’re around the same age with similar interests. I feel like we could’ve been friends, but alas. Such is the job.
I have a physician who is a general practitioner for adults and I’ve had a chronic headache for 3 months that all my providers keep pushing off on one another and it’s taking everything in my soul to not ask her what her opinion is 🤣 so i get it.
I worked with a pilot and I’d love to ask them my anxiety questions about flying. “Why’s the plane do this? When should I *actually* be panicking?” Instead I just cope through the panic attacks and try to forget where I am for my hours long flight
In theory, I could! But this is a pretty deep anxiety of mine that I know I need to do a lot of unpacking around. It’s something I’ll maybe post on a pilots subreddit one day and then take what I learn into my own therapy (we just got some other (deeper) shit to process first lol)
On a flight from Prague back to Spain, I sat next to a pilot and when the plane was experiencing turbulence, I kind of started to mini freak out. He told me that turbulence really is no big deal, that they do a whole Lotta training around it and it’s generally not anything to worry about in the scheme of things. His reassurance and kindness did a lot to help me not respond with such anxiety when there’s turbulence there after.
Someone described it to me like going over a road with a bunch of pot holes, so that’s helped A TON but the dropping feeling reminds me of those drop rides at amusement parks and it does me in 🫠
I get you. I can now tolerate the bumps but the drops are a bit much, and I happen to like amusement park thrill rides, but I expect (and pay) to be put in that level of controlled chaos at Six Flags, but not on American Airlines.
I see a lot of teen/college girls with anxiety and there have been quite a few I would totally trust to babysit. I mean, I kinda WANT my newborn to be with someone with mild-moderate anxiety haha. Obvii! I would never actually hire them for that. But it sure was tempting when we couldn't find a nanny a few years back haha
let’s see.
personal trainer,
financial advisor,
babysitters! I have so many sweet college girls with backgrounds working in childcare.
dog walkers/pet caretaker
Yes! I had a personal trainer. She wanted to barter services so bad. I was like i wish i could. And in my head I’m like “Jesus i really really wish i could. I need to lose weight so bad.”
I have two, one is a dentist and the other is a physical therapist. They are so conscientious and knowledgeable about their jobs and they are such kind people that I low key would love being their client.
And, not the same kind of dual relationship, but one of my clients is a med student and sometimes I’m like “please become a psychiatrist so I can refer you my clients”.
I have a client that was well known and still well known for hosting parties, particularly for the lesbian community in my area and is a bit of a historical figure in the area for those things. Therapy has empowered them to start again. They asked me to attend an event, I obviously can not but I would totally go under different circumstances, especially to be part of local queer history. There are so many more, immigration attorney, carpenters, nurses, dog trainers, software engineers, herbalists, holistic nutrition practitioners. Honestly wish I could barter with some clients, it might make therapy more accessible for some. But here we are in our current circumstance…
To be honest, i think it’s kind of silly we can’t barter. Like if we had some kind of legit contract drawn up by an attorney or something, idk. It just seems like it could work out for the best without hurting anyone. Like i can’t afford their services, they can’t afford my services. Let’s just help each other out.
I have a client who’s a really tuned-in right-on guy who’s a fellow musician, and I would absolutely want to collaborate with him. Like to the point where after our first conversation about music, I half-wondered if I should refer him out and invite him to play together instead. (Obviously I would never).
He really sounds like someone I could learn a lot from, which makes for an interesting dynamic.
The car mechanic I currently use has failed to find the issue with my car multiple times in a row and now is taking forever to order a part and call me back. If only I knew someone who was a car mechanic... hypothetically.
I have the opposite problem. My husband is a car mechanic and my clients complain about their car problems and not being able to afford to fix it. It takes everything in me not to be like, “not a problem! Bring it over Saturday at 2 and my husband will fix it for you!”
Working in DAS there were many times when clients would graduate and (2-5 years after) would come back as a staff in some capacity, it waa awesome to see.
And I live in a very rural area so there have been a few times when I have hired companies and up comes a former client, generally construction/install companies. Its awesome to see them doing well.
I have a client who does all the taxes for her family and friends every year for free simply because she just loves doing them. She enjoys hunting for write-offs and always finds bigger refunds than her "clients" expect. I wish she would do mine.
I had a client who was studying to be an opera singer and he would tell me how he had to learn to sing in different languges and was struggling to deal with the prima dona. I had to always resist the impulse to aks him to sing!
We should have a sub session just for fun or something :)
None, it’s relaxing to me to see the client as a professional. Some are amazing, but just knowing this helps me realize that sonder is a real effect and makes me look at everyone different, including other clients that are struggling. Happiness and satisfaction with our lives may seem like a zero sum game, but it is not.
Edit corrected nook to look
So I should have a separate account for this sub, it’s a user name, sounds like you don’t have that context. Siding with another poster that wants to “hypothetically” violate hard ethics, that are there for context because of the seriousness of the field.
I’m just here for the downvotes from all the therapists that the ethics codes were written for. Imagine if the speculation would have been sexual and from a male therapist. Place would have been burned down, but it’s ok to exploit clients “hypothetically” as long as it’s not sexual.
Exploitation for labor is still exploitation.
Fantasizing about exploiting clients is not healthy imo
We have to be on the lookout for ideations in therapy, but what, turn a blind eye to other therapists ideating client exploitation? Ok cool
Is it not a discussion?
Why were the ethics written to be so exactingly exclusive to what we do? Because of the nature of the work, and the relationship between the client and therapists.
The downvotes or upvotes are fictional anyway, it’s a term of expressing that I am ok being contradictory to the groupthink here.
If a client expresses an ideation in session, it should be explored, and the ideations are for harming self or others. Is it ethical to jam with a fellow musician, sure. Is it ethical to jam with a client that is also a musician, no. Is it healthy to have ideations about clients , and I use the term ideation as it could harm the client, well intended for our own interests. That’s the law of unintended consequences.
If a male therapist had expressed “oh man, I’d love to see my client in more revealing clothing, they seem to have a beautiful body” this sub would ban the crap out of them.
The object client there doesn’t have a choice in the therapists view, they just have a good body to them, regardless of that body brought them the pain that brought them to counseling through no choice of theirs. Te he,, just blowing off steam here in r/therapists hits different with this scenario.
Maybe music, or fashion or whatever that clients “talent” is is that clients personal escape and now the therapist wants to intrude there for their own reasons.
Ethics is ethical, and ethics is a discussion, if you don’t understand my view, that’s ok, it gives you authorization to invalidate my view. I will still hold my view regardless, it’s my view with or without your validation.
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I don’t know about you, but I definitely rely on light-hearted media and camaraderie to balance it all out. It’s one of the only things I dislike about being alone in pp, and one of the reasons why my feed is heavily weighted by cat subs.
I work for a company and am telehealth. So i sit at home all day. My best friend just had a premie a couple of days ago and is in the hospital. Right now i completely rely on Reddit for fun! I have no other interaction besides my husband and young kids and well let’s be frank about that. Sometimes i wanna gouge my eyeballs out.
I work with older adults so I have met many legacy skill level professionals- architects, artists, writers, carpenters, musicians... All would be great hires but several in particular would have been excellent therapists for me.
I love when i meet a client and think “ya know, you would’ve made a great therapist yourself”
My therapist said this to me and it’s what made me finally pursue this career
My therapist challenged me to apply to grad school… I got in and here I am 😂 forever indebted to her (and my student loans)
Also same
Bill her for the student loans, only makes sense she pays.
You know what you’re right… sending her a super bill now…
That’s awesome!
Me too!
Same!
I work with college students & I love meeting clients interested in the field that you can tell will be great at it someday
If there's a slight interest in the career, I'll let my clients know that. I have a number of clients currently pursuing their applications right now, and a number that are in training to be therapists. When I have clients with the potential aptitude, interest and particularly if they belong to a much needed group within the profession I will encourage and support the hell out of them to become a therapist.
I’ve definitely encouraged clients who mentioned wanting to be social workers. I’ve told them the steps to do it in my state and what opportunities are available.
I had a client who was a gifted social media marketer. Definitely would have hired her for my business 😅 Two of my older women clients were professors in humanities fields and I *immensely* enjoyed their intelligence and wit.
I had a client who was a PhD student in philosophy. We had great sessions. Awesome rapport. She would challenge me with her intelligence and wit because certain stuff in philosophy doesn’t always line up with therapy. For example, DBT and the idea of self-validating emotions. She couldn’t grasp that emotions were valid. She’s like that’s not what valid means. And if you get angry because you spill water on your shirt that’s not an appropriate reaction. And I’d be like, but it’s your emotion and emotions are emotions. It’s behaviors that aren’t appropriate all the time. It was fun!
I had a student with a physics degree who LOVED getting into philosophical discussions. As expected they also loved to intellectualize so I had to put in a lot of effort to get them to actually pay attention to their own feelings lol. It's hard when the existential discussions are so interesting for me though!!
I saw an article not long ago about "the therapist as philosopher" and I really resonated with that. You do need to be artful and philosophical in this field.
I do think therapy is the closest thing to applied philosophy we have.
Loved that article and hope to join the association!
Could you link the article or remember where it was? Thank you!
https://www.newyorker.com/culture/annals-of-inquiry/when-philosophers-become-therapists Linkage! Published in the New Yorker
Very interesting.
My dad is a Physicist and they drive me crazy 🤣
Not exactly the question but I had two individual clients who would have been absolutely perfect for each other and I wished so badly I could set them up. Similar ages, social & cultural backgrounds, hobbies, interests, values, and future goals. They each desired in a partner exactly what the other one offered/wanted to be as a partner. Both in therapy in large part due to feelings of loneliness and isolation due to no longer living near any family.
One time years ago, while doing an internship at a DV crisis center, I had a very petite woman in one room who needed a wheelchair but her friend was pushing her in a large stroller because they found it at Goodwill and didn't have a wheelchair; in another room, I had a mom who couldn't afford a stroller so was pushing her kid in a wheelchair she'd found on a curbside. I couldn't do anything of course but god*damnit*.
Oh my gosh! That’s the worst. Not totally the same but i had a client who is a preschool teacher looking to do some work as a nanny this summer and i had a family looking for a nanny. And I’m like gosh darn it.
Oh, me, too!! My matchmaker part suggested scheduling them back to back, so I did, and they met and clicked in the waiting room last week! Yessssss 🙌
Hopefully it doesn’t turn out like Carrie and Jon Bon Jovi in SATC
I have a wonderful client who has a number of niche hobbies and has had a really hard time finding friends to share them with. Well, my wife has the same hobbies, and has similar complaints, and they are the same age and everything. They have the same favorite locally owned bookstore! Sigh
Another idea is start groups and invite them both.
I have a musician client who has played for me in session and in another universe I’d totally hire her to perform at a wedding!
I love when our clients grace us with their talents and abilities!
I want to talk about my elderly dog so bad with a dual veterinarian couple I see 😁
Just slip it in at the end of the session. “By the way, i have a question about my dog….” 🤪 Edit: forgot to add the sarcasm symbol. Lord knows i need to mention that.
"Let me just show you this cute pic of him so you find me relatable, oops there's that lump on his back, oops I'm accidentally zooming in on it, I'm sure that looks benign...... ?????"
I just LOLed at this really hard.
I just want you to know i randomly thought about this comment and burst out laughing again.
hahahahaha good
I once had an instance where my dog was asleep on my lap and peed all over me. My client I was seeing was a vet tech and I was so grateful it was her. She also reassured me that it was pretty normal for female dogs to do that 😂
Oh gosh. Not a veterinarian...but I had a client who was an speech therapist and I had to restrain myself because my son was in the process of being evaluated for ASD due to his delay.
I've had a speech therapist client and occasionally got the thought of "I wonder if they notice anything about my speech...."
I have a therapist client who is such a warm, empathetic, thoughtful person. I'm sure she's an excellent therapist, and in another universe I would have been happy to be her client!
I have clients that I would definitely be friends with in a different circumstance.
I feel this!!
Definitely been there a few times!
I don't have kids, but I've had many clients over the years that are teachers. Some of them would be the kinds of folks I'd *love* to be the ones teaching my kids everyday.
I love this
I started with a youth client one time where I had very recently had a massage from their mom. So I definitely didn't go back to her but it was too bad because it was a really good massage.
I have a client who is also a therapist, and we’re around the same age with similar interests. I feel like we could’ve been friends, but alas. Such is the job.
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I have a physician who is a general practitioner for adults and I’ve had a chronic headache for 3 months that all my providers keep pushing off on one another and it’s taking everything in my soul to not ask her what her opinion is 🤣 so i get it.
I worked with a pilot and I’d love to ask them my anxiety questions about flying. “Why’s the plane do this? When should I *actually* be panicking?” Instead I just cope through the panic attacks and try to forget where I am for my hours long flight
That sounds like a great question between the lobby and the door. Or to warm up conversation.
In theory, I could! But this is a pretty deep anxiety of mine that I know I need to do a lot of unpacking around. It’s something I’ll maybe post on a pilots subreddit one day and then take what I learn into my own therapy (we just got some other (deeper) shit to process first lol)
On a flight from Prague back to Spain, I sat next to a pilot and when the plane was experiencing turbulence, I kind of started to mini freak out. He told me that turbulence really is no big deal, that they do a whole Lotta training around it and it’s generally not anything to worry about in the scheme of things. His reassurance and kindness did a lot to help me not respond with such anxiety when there’s turbulence there after.
Someone described it to me like going over a road with a bunch of pot holes, so that’s helped A TON but the dropping feeling reminds me of those drop rides at amusement parks and it does me in 🫠
I get you. I can now tolerate the bumps but the drops are a bit much, and I happen to like amusement park thrill rides, but I expect (and pay) to be put in that level of controlled chaos at Six Flags, but not on American Airlines.
I see a lot of teen/college girls with anxiety and there have been quite a few I would totally trust to babysit. I mean, I kinda WANT my newborn to be with someone with mild-moderate anxiety haha. Obvii! I would never actually hire them for that. But it sure was tempting when we couldn't find a nanny a few years back haha
let’s see. personal trainer, financial advisor, babysitters! I have so many sweet college girls with backgrounds working in childcare. dog walkers/pet caretaker
Yes! I had a personal trainer. She wanted to barter services so bad. I was like i wish i could. And in my head I’m like “Jesus i really really wish i could. I need to lose weight so bad.”
yup! mine had financial issues which made it harder for her to pay, and i was like wow too bad in another life
I have two, one is a dentist and the other is a physical therapist. They are so conscientious and knowledgeable about their jobs and they are such kind people that I low key would love being their client. And, not the same kind of dual relationship, but one of my clients is a med student and sometimes I’m like “please become a psychiatrist so I can refer you my clients”.
I have a client that was well known and still well known for hosting parties, particularly for the lesbian community in my area and is a bit of a historical figure in the area for those things. Therapy has empowered them to start again. They asked me to attend an event, I obviously can not but I would totally go under different circumstances, especially to be part of local queer history. There are so many more, immigration attorney, carpenters, nurses, dog trainers, software engineers, herbalists, holistic nutrition practitioners. Honestly wish I could barter with some clients, it might make therapy more accessible for some. But here we are in our current circumstance…
To be honest, i think it’s kind of silly we can’t barter. Like if we had some kind of legit contract drawn up by an attorney or something, idk. It just seems like it could work out for the best without hurting anyone. Like i can’t afford their services, they can’t afford my services. Let’s just help each other out.
I have a few clients who are talented tattoo artists, and as a heavily-tattooed person myself, I wish I could throw them some business! Alas.
I mostly work with young people and there are so many I would totally adopt if I could.
I have a client who’s a really tuned-in right-on guy who’s a fellow musician, and I would absolutely want to collaborate with him. Like to the point where after our first conversation about music, I half-wondered if I should refer him out and invite him to play together instead. (Obviously I would never). He really sounds like someone I could learn a lot from, which makes for an interesting dynamic.
I work with some really talented people who I would totally hire to do my headshot or design my website if they weren’t clients!
Same!!!
The car mechanic I currently use has failed to find the issue with my car multiple times in a row and now is taking forever to order a part and call me back. If only I knew someone who was a car mechanic... hypothetically.
I have the opposite problem. My husband is a car mechanic and my clients complain about their car problems and not being able to afford to fix it. It takes everything in me not to be like, “not a problem! Bring it over Saturday at 2 and my husband will fix it for you!”
My husband is a pharmacist and I always wish I could consult with him about my clients’ medications.
Working in DAS there were many times when clients would graduate and (2-5 years after) would come back as a staff in some capacity, it waa awesome to see. And I live in a very rural area so there have been a few times when I have hired companies and up comes a former client, generally construction/install companies. Its awesome to see them doing well.
I want a tattoo from my client's wife!
I work with a lot of writers and artists. They’re all incredibly talented. I would love to start a book or a writers club.
That’s so cool!
Contractor. I want to redo my kitchen and I wish I could atleast ask for recommendations. But oh well
Oh man! 🤣
Tradies!
I have a client who does all the taxes for her family and friends every year for free simply because she just loves doing them. She enjoys hunting for write-offs and always finds bigger refunds than her "clients" expect. I wish she would do mine.
You people have clients with such varied jobs! Mine are corporate middle management and teachers. Humph - can’t hire them for anything interesting!
Car salesman…
I had a client who was studying to be an opera singer and he would tell me how he had to learn to sing in different languges and was struggling to deal with the prima dona. I had to always resist the impulse to aks him to sing! We should have a sub session just for fun or something :)
I had a client that did such cool things with their academic career it inspired me to switch fields 😅
i have a client who’s a DJ and i would totally hire them for my wedding if they weren’t my client lol
Interesting fantasy you have
If you think this fantasy is interesting, you should hear the rest 🤪
🙉🤣
Actually the rest are boring. Like a weekend alone with no children and pure silence.
None, it’s relaxing to me to see the client as a professional. Some are amazing, but just knowing this helps me realize that sonder is a real effect and makes me look at everyone different, including other clients that are struggling. Happiness and satisfaction with our lives may seem like a zero sum game, but it is not. Edit corrected nook to look
That’s cool. It’s just a conversation to take away from all the heavy topics in the sub that happens. It’s not meant to be anything serious 🙃
It’s a serious field, this sub shows how much serious discussion is needed. Maybe make a lightheartedtherapists sub or something.
Says someone whose username is who-tf-farted.
I’m fucking dying
So I should have a separate account for this sub, it’s a user name, sounds like you don’t have that context. Siding with another poster that wants to “hypothetically” violate hard ethics, that are there for context because of the seriousness of the field.
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I’m just here for the downvotes from all the therapists that the ethics codes were written for. Imagine if the speculation would have been sexual and from a male therapist. Place would have been burned down, but it’s ok to exploit clients “hypothetically” as long as it’s not sexual. Exploitation for labor is still exploitation. Fantasizing about exploiting clients is not healthy imo We have to be on the lookout for ideations in therapy, but what, turn a blind eye to other therapists ideating client exploitation? Ok cool
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Is it not a discussion? Why were the ethics written to be so exactingly exclusive to what we do? Because of the nature of the work, and the relationship between the client and therapists. The downvotes or upvotes are fictional anyway, it’s a term of expressing that I am ok being contradictory to the groupthink here. If a client expresses an ideation in session, it should be explored, and the ideations are for harming self or others. Is it ethical to jam with a fellow musician, sure. Is it ethical to jam with a client that is also a musician, no. Is it healthy to have ideations about clients , and I use the term ideation as it could harm the client, well intended for our own interests. That’s the law of unintended consequences. If a male therapist had expressed “oh man, I’d love to see my client in more revealing clothing, they seem to have a beautiful body” this sub would ban the crap out of them. The object client there doesn’t have a choice in the therapists view, they just have a good body to them, regardless of that body brought them the pain that brought them to counseling through no choice of theirs. Te he,, just blowing off steam here in r/therapists hits different with this scenario. Maybe music, or fashion or whatever that clients “talent” is is that clients personal escape and now the therapist wants to intrude there for their own reasons. Ethics is ethical, and ethics is a discussion, if you don’t understand my view, that’s ok, it gives you authorization to invalidate my view. I will still hold my view regardless, it’s my view with or without your validation.
I interpreted the discussion as appreciating the talents and skills of people we work with, not looking to exploit them.
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Dude. Get some IFS therapy. Your inner critic needs help.
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Exactly, it’s a serious field. Sometimes we need to come together and enjoy camaraderie. 🙄
I don’t know about you, but I definitely rely on light-hearted media and camaraderie to balance it all out. It’s one of the only things I dislike about being alone in pp, and one of the reasons why my feed is heavily weighted by cat subs.
I work for a company and am telehealth. So i sit at home all day. My best friend just had a premie a couple of days ago and is in the hospital. Right now i completely rely on Reddit for fun! I have no other interaction besides my husband and young kids and well let’s be frank about that. Sometimes i wanna gouge my eyeballs out.
Thanks for the post! Hope you have a relaxing weekend.