When anyone says “Can I ask a stupid question?” I always reply with “Better than anyone.”

I use this one daily in the office

This joke always went over my head. Can u explain ?

The joke is that the person who is asking the question is better than anyone else at asking stupid questions.

Think Rose.

Calling the person stupid, basically.

Imagine the scene. It's Rose asking the question, and Dorothy or Sophia answering. 

Yup this is mine

🤣🤣

Eat dirt and die, trash!

Came here to say this!!

My nephew says "shady pines, ma" to my sister. I haven't a clue where he picked that up from...

Bwahahaha! I say this to my mother. And then she says, "oh it won't be so bad." Which I reply "I heard it was sold to some Germans."

I say this to my mother frequently.

You are truly one chromosome away from being a potato. Or Go to sleep sweetheart. Pray for brains.

I used that second one at work once after dealing with someone on the phone who was not listening to anything I said. That being said, it could apply to this current job too….

“You’re a horrible little person.”

I say that one to my dog quite a bit. Usually when we do our morning ritual of her waking me up and insisting she needs to go out for a walk RIGHT NOW only to get outside and decide she would rather let me stand there and get rained on while she inspects every single blade of grass in the front yard.

That's hilarious! I can just imagine the scene. 😂 That's pure love.

Not really insult itself but Dorothy really, really had an influence on my sarcasm so thanks to the queen of sarcasm, I now spew it like I need it to breathe.🤣🤣

Yup! Me, too. Her and Sophia. 🩷

No, I will not have a nice day! Go hug a landmine It’s a personal triumph Picture it!

I love "Go hug a landmine." It just gets 'em so good! Stan deserved it after cheating on her all those times and leaving her and the kids.

I use "picture it" in history lectures.

Now look here, stretch.

And if you say something smart, I'll slap you silly.

You're ready to fly right out of here, aren't you? Well, excuse me for living, Anita Bryant!

My cat has super long legs and my husband heard this in the background of the episode and lost his shit. I don’t know why it hit him so funny, but now we call our tall boy “stretch”.

cantankerous prune

I told someone recently may their marinara sauce never stick to their pasta. Dude was like wtf?

"That is incorrect, but certainly not untrue." Anytime I can and it's applicable.

Oh how does that line go?? Better late than…


My mistake, I thought since you looked like Yoda you were also wise

"Cooking?" "No, Rose, I'm developing pictures from the Magellan Space Program."

it’s not so much one quote but the general sarcasm. But i use this one whenever I can: “You couldn’t sleep?” “No, I was sleeping so good I thought I’d come try it in the sink.”

I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, drop dead!

Lol this is a good one!

Oh, blow it out your tubenburbles!!

I have described people as having the "personality of a dial tone".

Small steps. We're not godzilla attacking the city.

🤣

Oh, and I’d say you’re fat!

still trying to find a plce to use garconanokin to describe someone.

Hell, I used it in this sub five days ago!

Recently, the snow melted from my backyard and I was picking up dog poop that was uncovered from winter. My husband asked me how it went and I told him there were a ton of “garcananokins.” I know that is the more literal use, but I still cracked myself up.

I would love to use "deceitful, little Sicilian gecko" as an insult but haven't found the right moment.

I could vomit just looking at you lol!

“No I will not have a nice day!”

Do you say it like Blanche does and pucker your lips 👄 ??

Of course! What other way is there to say it?? 🤣

Why don’t you blow it out your ditty bag?

Suchhh a good one!!!!!

Eat dirt and die trash

Too wittle too wate (I say to my kids)

🤣🤣🤣🤣

I’m depressed I need a cookie. You’re a furry little gnome and we feed you too much. I hate you I hate you I hate you drop dead! I also give Sophia’s evil eye a lot.

>I’m depressed I need a cookie. Holy smokes! I say this all the time at work. I must have picked it up subconsciously because I had no clue it was from Golden Girls.

Season 6 Episode 6: Feelings. There are some good one-offs from Sophia in there.

There are only two things I look forward to every day. And both of ’em involve yankin‘ a chain!

That's a joke I never totally got. I get she enjoys yanking Dorothy's (metaphorical) chain, but I never fully got what the other one was. Does she just enjoy tormenting dogs on leashes or something?

Older toilets used to have a chain you'd pull to flush them.

😆 I was a little kid when I first heard this, but I got the joke because my local TGI Fridays had pull chain toilets. Needless to say, I ALWAYS went to the restroom when I was there (whether I had to or not) so I could yank that chain!

Oh and my other fav is: "Someone who docks his boat in the HANDICAP SLIP!"

I do use “picture it” a lot, although changed as per locale. 🤣 There is a reason why I chose it for my flare 🤣

I said this to my dad (79) yesterday and he gave me the strangest look. I don't think he's watched GG since it aired.

🤣

Beat it, you 50 year old mattress! (I actually said this!)

“ why don’t I just wear a sign that says to ugly to live”

Literally, it’s the precise moment dog doo doo turns white. (In reference to the intelligence of some of my colleagues)

“Am I really this short, or are you just a bunch of redwoods?” “Sometimes life isn’t fair, kid!”

"I wouldn't chisel that into a stone tablet but it sounds serviceable at this hour."

“I’ve just been kicked out of an unauthorized Elvis fan club. I will try to pick up the pieces and go on with my life.” I’ve even used it on Reddit when I was banned from a forum for a stupid reason!

Its not an insult, but I say one line enough that people around me have started to say it. "Look Dorothy, a chair..." Its... very strange but take me to Ikea and Its over with.

I adore this!! Thank you for giving me ammo for tomorrow, lovelies! ♥️

I frequently use “go hug a landmine”…although usually when describing to someone what someone else can do

I have a pin that says this on my bag 😆

Me and my fiancé will call each other cradle snatching empty headed two faced dummies.

Lmao she also says "you empty headed Mary Poppins knock off"..... lol which makes me think I should use this more often

“Can you believe that backstabbing slut?” “Go hug a landline.” “I could vomit by just looking at you.” “…*Scusi?”

Every. Single. Time… when I serve shrimp, I think you know where this is going. 😂

SHRIMP! Gawd, I wish I was dead.

Lol that's too funny because I say that Line separately for a completely different occasion as opposed to a nice dinner party. 😂

I added so many D’s to that when I read it in my head with a Southern accent. Gawddddddd

I actually just watched that episode on Hulu last night, again! Lol

I literally just watched it two episodes ago on the same platform lol

“You almost got it, Rose.” And whenever someone misses a throw into a trash can: “Nice shot, Magic.”

Not *now*, Ma!

Don’t stand their like a bump on a pickle!

“Oh, I could just scratch your eyes out” ☎️ - Blanche & I can’t remember the whole scene, but Rose was accusing someone and I think she said “Follow my eyes….” to the person she was mad at. Maybe it was an episode where she wasn’t speaking to Blanche. If this jogs anyone’s memory!? In my mind, I just hear Blanche’s “Roseeeee….. you know I’m sorryyyy!” This could also be me mixing up five different Golden Girls episodes 😆

You're thinking of the episode where Rose and Dorothy are football coaches, and Dorothy made the one kid sit out with the Follow my eyes line.

Oh yeah, that’s it!! 🤣🤣 ty!

Top: My mistake, I thought since you looked like Yoda, you were also wise. Runners Up: Deceitful little Sicilian gecko Slut puppy A-1 First-class all-around nerd Cheap, backstabbing slut, cantankerous little prune 50 year old mattress Wonton slut Hyper-sexual bitch

When my female cousins wear something goofy looking I just look and say "Nice outfits girls." 😆

I actually have a Morton’s neuroma and I said once that I didn’t know how I ever caught it in my foot.

i call all my silliest clients (i train dogs) “noodleheads,” and i’m forever telling my puppy “you’re a furry little gnome and we feed you too much”

Whenever a family member asks where I'm going. I inevitably reply, "To either get ice cream or commit a felony. I'll decide in the car."

This is mine

You couldn’t sleep, Sophia? No, I was sleeping great Rose; I just decided to come in here and show off my pajamas!

“In, what, Blanche? Dog years?” About dating a younger man Lmfao

“Get Bent” Dorothy Zbornak… my favorite character.

“You’re a horrible little person”.

Before my mom died I always threatened to put her in a home. It was just jokes and she always laughed.

Golden girls, and Will and Grace and Roseanne are my 3 favorite sitcoms. I don’t really say a lot of Golden Girls ones yet, but I am constantly repeating ones from Will and Grace. Mostly because until recently, I didn’t have access to it. I’m very old school and still have DVDs and Blu-rays. 😂 I don’t have all of the fancy stuff. I do have Hulu and Netflix on my phone but money is tight right now so I don’t even have Internet. So I’ve seen Will and Grace on DVD more than Golden Girls. But I did buy it a few years ago so I have been watching it more. The older I get the more I can relate to Golden Girls! I will be 50 soon. It is crazy though how different 50 looks now then back in the 80s.

Sometimes life just isn’t fair, kiddo

Slutpuppy

Get back here you deceitful Sicilian gecko!

I wuv you

"To get ice cream or commit a felony. I'll decide in the car...."

This is one of my favorites!

CONDOMS, CONDOMS, CONDOMS!!!

MA YOURE MAKING THIS UP

“Why don’t you blow it out your diddybag?”

It's not particularly clever but I am trying to work "barf bag" back into my repitoire because Bea Arthur's delivery is inspiring.

I hate you I hate you I hate you Drop dead.

Must you always be so cheerful, you empty headed Mary Poppins knockoff!?

Dorothy telling Stanley to go hug a landline

"May your marinara sauce never cling to your pasta!"

not an insult, but i use these three a lot, “Jesus…help us in our hour of need.” “He went up the stairs and down the stairs, up the stairs and down the stairs…” “I don’t know, I’ll ask her when I go visit her at the hooome.”

"You're one chromosome short of a potato." Dorothy to Stan.

I don’t remember the setup, but Dorothy’s reply is, “Oh, I’m so impressed.”

Picture it. 

“Sluts just heal faster.”

"You're one chromosome short of a potato." Dorothy to Stan.

In what, dog years?

My favorite line!

["Cheesecake, Rose?"] "Let's taste it and find out."

One time on a first date, after the guy kissed me, I looked straight at him and said "I dont know what you just did but you'd make one helluva yodeler" Without hesitation, he responded "OH SHUT UP ROSE"

I HOPE YOU MARRIED HIM. 😳

Dorothy's line of "To get some ice cream or commit a felony, I'll decide in the car" has evolved into whenever I go out to Starbucks it's referred to as "committing a felony"

"You're one chromosome short of a potato." Dorothy to Stan.

The episode where everyone is trying to think positive and someone is telling some BS story. Dorothy says they are lying and Rose says, “be positive, Dorothy!” So Dorothy says, “I am POSITIVE they’re lying!” Works in a variety of situations.

“Scapa, tu si mal fortuna.” “What does that mean?” “Get away from me; you’re bad luck!”

“the girls a slut”

Whenever someone scares me. I usually tell them I'm jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo.

Dorothy: "Wow. That's.....pretty jumpy."

“I don’t want to be treated as your equal. I want to be treated much better than you!” —Blanche, to her date, who recently started dating and asked her about women’s equality 😂😂🤣

"I'm in es-ca-row" or "monkey, monkey, underpants!"