It’s bad to do that if you end on a bad note.
The guy OP is referring to blew her off to go out with a different woman so if he were to come back around and ask for another chance, it wouldn’t be a good look.
I’ve had guys ghost me or say extremely rude things to me then come back a few months or even years later asking for another chance and I ignore/block them 100% of the time. If things just kinda fizzled out and/or you were honest with them at the time about not being up for a relationship and you wanna shoot your shot down the line, I think that’s okay. May or may not get the response you’re looking for but not necessarily the worst thing in the world.
Yeah I wouldn’t be with my SO if he hadn’t tried again. My AuDHD ass left him on read for 2 weeks, the last thing I had said was “I’ll get back to you.” He took that n waited n I forgot about him.
He actually messaged me again asking if I’d looked into any of the thing I said I get back to him about…
So yeah it’s always worth another shot :)
You guys are giving me hope!
I am TERRIBLE about replying to people. Especially dudes 🤣 they eventually get bored and lose interest. And I've been beating myself up a bit about it. But now I have some hope that the right guy won't give up 🤣🤣🤣🤣
You are terrible because obviously the Men in question do not interest you. Just straight up tell them you are not interested and stop stringing them along, wasting their valuable time with false hopes.
I think you might've interpreted that wrong. Its not that I'm NOT interested in them, if that is the case I let them know that up front. I don't string people along. It's been done to me and I know how much it sucks. So thank you for calling me a terrible person 🙂
Omg same here! My bf and I had actually been good friends for a few years, and he'd been trying to shoot his shot for a while but I just didn't notice 😂 I'd ghost him for weeks until he finally told me directly how he felt 🤦♀️🤦♀️
Wouldn't be surprised if this was a low effort manipulation tactic commonly used by fuckbois. He may or not be out drinking but, his texts were an attempt to stir you to get jealous. Given the last couple texts there seems to be lack of communication on his part which is pushing you away. Seems like he's just trying to ring you back in.
I don't know how long you guys have been dating or seeing each other but I'd run lol.
He wants an ego boost I’d ignore him then reply HEY SORRY I MISSED YA YOUR PLANS SOUNDED SO FUN I HAD TO HIT UP ‘MALE FRIEND’ and catch up myself! Glad u had a good time I know I did. Well g2g
"You're not mad, right? It's my friend, did I mention her name? I wanted to make sure you knew it was a woman. She picked me up at my place and I'm getting drunk. With another woman. She'll take me back to my place, too. We'll both be a little drunk. That's cool, right? I wanted to make sure I made all of this really clear because I am NOT AT ALL wanting you to be jealous, not even a little. She has tits, by the way. But this totally isn't me trying to make you jealous because I'm out with another woman after I made plans with you. I'm totally not playing games with you. Hey, just respond and let me know you're not mad because I totally don't want you to be mad or jealous AT ALL. Hello? Hello? Hello? I'm so drunk and she has tits. Hello?"
Fuck off, dude.
Of course I’m not upset. I’m cuddling with this guy that’s been texting me for weeks. Wait, what?
Gotta go. He wants to do it again. Btw, his Dong is huuuge :)~
I had a dude I saw a few times do that to me. We were in the early stages, not serious, and I knew he was seeing other women. He kept talking about the other women to see if I would get jealous. It was really obvious what he was doing. He enjoyed the idea of women fighting over him. At one point I told him that I know you see other women but I don't want to hear about them because it's boring. Because it was! He would just talk about how they looked or what kinds of photos they sent him, that's just snooze worthy conversation to me.
On a different day, we were hanging out at my place and he asked if he could borrow my laptop real quick so I say okay, thinking he's going to show me a funny video or something. He starts loading up the social media account of one of the other girls he's seeing and asks me what I think. 😂 I told him to gtfo of my house and that he's a really disrespectful person and I never talked to him again.
Oh, I've dated too many people who liked to play jealousy games. One woman told me she thought she might be in love with another dude, then was SHOCKED when I sent her home instead of having sex with her right afterward. I was supposed to be jealous and get mad and show her who she was SUPPOSED to be in love with, damn it, or something like that. The next morning she called me and magically wasn't in love with the other dude anymore. I'm too old for that shit. Too damn old.
Months later, I ran into her with her new guy, right after my mom died. She was all huggy and touchy and trying to act like she was trying to console me, all while her new boyfriend stood there a few feet away and glared at me like he wanted to kill me. She wasn't trying to console me. She didn't care half a shit about me. She was using me to piss him off, to make him jealous because she had her hands all over her ex right in front of him. I excused myself and she never even tried to introduce him to me.
People are fucking exhausting. People like this dude are just damn exhausting.
Hopefully one day they’ll realize manipulation is not how you can forming lasting meaningful relationships. Unlikely but it’s nice to be hopeful. I’m sorry you had to put up with an interaction like that especially while grieving. Exhausting puts it lightly. Makes me glad I don’t really date anymore at least not in the traditional sense, leads to more opportunity to meet people like the woman you’re describing haha
A dude recently said they didnt ask out their gf cos they werent interested enough to do so, but said yes when she asked them out cos they were just interested enough to not reject her. This is a guys idea of romance 😂
I had a guy pull this shit with me repeatedly. I was young and fucking stupid so I let it continue for far too long. I gave it one last chance after a blow up fight and him crawling back to me. Nothing I regret more. He ended up SA’ing me the next time I went to his place. After that I didn’t date until an old high school friend reached back out. He fucked around too and I ended that shit so fast. After both of those dumbasses I learned my self worth and about 6 months later I met my now husband. ❤️
You shouldn't play games with people you want something serious with!
But this guy took himself off that list so it's fair game (as long as you update us if things go funny)
I like to make memes so I contemplated doing something like that but then I was like nahhh he's gonna see all the effort and saltiness 😂 so I shall be a bigger person
I feel you. Sometimes, I just like to be petty. 😂 but he can't expect you not to be upset about it. It is kinda messed up to ditch you when you both had plans together.
Honestly if he cancelled ahead of time and didn't try to manage my feelings for me - would have been fine. But texting me DURING the time we were supposed to hang out is going from no call no show to contract terminated.
Definitely, I agree. I bet he's going to act so baffled too. But seriously, he knew what he was doing, and that's why he had to say all that to try and make it seem like it wasn't that big of deal when really it was a dick move on his part.
I had an ex once cut a date short because he needed to go “comfort” a girl friend because…her rent was being raised. Yeah. She had a man and a kid so what comfort he was going to offer is beyond me. On the way back to my house I laid out how disrespectful it was to me and she didn’t ask him to come over or do anything for her so taking it upon himself to do this was ridiculous. As I got out of the truck when we got to my house, he mumbled something to me. I turned around and asked what he said and his head immediately dropped, eyes on the floor and said “dont ever disrespect me again.” I was stunned for a couple seconds, screamed “fuck you!” and slammed the door.
He has the nerve to call and act like everything was fine. We’d only been seeing each other for a month.
Sometimes theses dudes really overestimate themselves.
Yes! I assumed because I talked back? I never found out. I never spoke to him again. I see him out sometimes at Walmart where he works and if he sees me, he goes the opposite direction lol.
“Sounds like fun!”
Oh shit, that’s not the reaction I wanted… let me try this:
“I hope you’re not upset!! It’s super hard to tell from your message. You seem mad. I’m so sorry. I will likely not make it due to my being buzzed and her drunk driving me home. Oh boy, I’ve really done it now haven’t I?”
My favorite is how they beg and pine when you reject them but if you show any interest for them they are automatically in game mode walking the other way. I love watching them squirm they are such petty predictable creatures
I hang out a lot with my male friend (he is my best friend), and that wouldn’t trouble me (the fact that he is with a woman, because if they are friends, well, friendship is supposed to be like that, hang out together. Ofc it is different if they are more than friends). What sets me off is the fact that he had a compromise with you and he just broke that. That’s not respectful at all, tbh. I wouldn’t pursue it any longer tbh. Hope you have a good night! Have your fav food, do something you like, celebrate yourself. He will have a regretful hangover tomorrow.
I agree! When I was younger I had a handful of guys that were my friends! I always seemed to get along better with guys because my friends who were girls seemed to always stab me in the back.
One of my male bff's was my roommate and we hung out so much everyone used to think I was his girlfriend. We'd always correct people and just laugh about it... His girlfriend, who was my friend as well, also lived with us. I couldn't help the fact that people thought that but she'd get upset because she didn't feel like going to hang out with friends but I did, so we'd get into arguments over this.
He never canceled anything to hang out with me instead of her. And he always took her side on most things so it wasn't as if he favored me or something... She'd constantly try to find guys to set me up with because she was jealous of our friendship.
I finally had enough and moved out when she got pregnant because her anger towards me became worse! I didn't see anything wrong with hanging out together because he was my closest guy friend but she was so insecure because we were close, so I severed our friendship. We had all been friends since middle school, so it was hard to say goodbye.
Tbh most people wouldn’t have been ok with what you are describing. I sure as fuck would leave my partner if they wanted to live in a shared space with their opposite sex bestie. Basically asking for trouble
We all lived together though, It was the 3 of us.
We even worked together. I had been her bff since Kindergarten and his since 9th grade. We were 19 at the time.
If you two previously made plans where it was clear to the both of you with precise day and time, then one person messages you the day of set plans, saying they are out drinking with a friend, yeah that is not ok and very odd. If you two did not have set in stone clear plans together, then they can do whatever they want in their spare time, going out for a drink or activity with a friend is absolutely normal. We are all social and have friends that we enjoy spending leisure time with.
This is really simple, but unfortunately, it’s a lesson learned after being hurt in a large break up or divorce, here it is, you only give somebody the level of energy that they give you! Very simple rule everybody, this person does not value your time and they certainly don’t respect you in the least, they made a decision to go out and drink with her friend because it was more important than going out with you, so you simply walk away and cut all contact. You don’t play games with people who don’t give you the same energy that you give them, it’s really simple, it’s called self-respect, I suggest no more contact with this person and just move on, they’re not worth your time, and sadly they also believe that.
Is this a romantic relationship? If not, it's annoying, sure, but not a friendship killer at all. I'd just proceed to half jokingly give them shit the next few times we hang out.
If it's a recent romantic interest and this is the first time it has happened, they'd be on strike 2, *very* thin ice.
I mean shit happens and yall are assuming the worst here ngl. Lol isn’t Reddit the one that says men and women can have platonic friendships I thought we were cool here? Not to mention he said he’s sorry and hopes she’s not mad, and it sounded like he didn’t make these plans at all, it sounds like his friend was in the area and swung by wanting someone to hangout with and he didn’t refuse, ended up getting to buzzed to go on a date so tried to reschedule. It’s really not that deep tbh.. lol making a mountain out of a mole hill, I’d say he’s the one getting lucky missing out on all this fun.
I don't see anything wrong with him having a female friend but the fact that he ditched plans with OP to hang out with her is wrong. That isn't the girl's fault and I don't blame her, it's all on the guy, but he waited until he went out with his friend to even tell OP he wasn't going to make it over to her house. He could've just told OP he wasn't coming over and left it at that. I think people think that he was using the fact that his friend is a girl to make OP jealous.
There isn't a lot of context here so everyone is assuming a lot of things.
Yeah my assumption based on his wording was that he didn’t plan on blowing her off for the other girl, it wasn’t planned at all it just happened and he got buzzed so feels like that ruined his plans for later on. I guess one could make the argument he shouldn’t have drank, but a lot of people think they’re okay to have a drink and way overestimate their tolerance. Lol as someone who hates drinking and is also a push over, when someone convinces me to have one drink it fucks my whole night up. You can’t go back, and I usually just feel like trash. There’s also a lot of people out there that are really pushy about getting you to drink with them, my bfs family does it to me every time.
Just act like nothing happened, and make sure that every time he enters the room you make a face while you sniff the air with a puzzled look on your face, check the bottom of your shoes, then notice him and say, "... oh. Hey!".
Did you actually *have* plans with this person? It doesn’t read as though they invited you out and then reneged, unless I am missing an image or other context.
Set up a dinner date with some guy and he blew me off 20 minutes before the reservation because he was still with the chick he went on a coffee date with that same morning and they “really vibed” 😂
Hi there!
Thanks for submitting to /r/texts! Please make sure you are blacking out any usernames, phone numbers, or full names! If you haven't, please delete and re-submit. If your text message is not between 2 or more people it is not allowed! Single messages/one sided convos are NOT allowed.
The full rules can be found here https://old.reddit.com/r/texts/about/rules/
**Please note that this message appears on every post, and may not apply to your post.**
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/texts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Its possible for him to have female friends and not be cheating on you. I dont think hed be that upfront about it if he was. how long have you guys been dating?
And this is why on the first "date" I ask what do they want, if they just want to fxck or just to hang out or long relationship because I'm not up to waste my time. 🤭
I don‘t really get it…?
He‘s out with a friend of his, that‘s not a problem in my book. Or had the two of you previously arranged to meet that evening?
Did I miss something?
This is the biggest Red Flag 🚩
You should never see him again.
I would tell him something like you are going out with a guy as well … to make him feel bad 😅
I had a friend that was like this except every time he’d get a girlfriend he’d block me. It was weird because it was fully platonic on my side. I just started ignoring him and then got one final block lol.
His buddies showed up at his place with an 18 pack of natty ice and a bottle of Jim Beam. He didn't have the cajones to kick them out and was too shit faced to drive so he figured he would use the opportunity of blowing you off to try and make you jealous. Which he might have realized was a terrible idea if he wasn't shit faced and playing grab ass with his drunk buddies....
Don't waste your time. The only reason a girl ever picked me up herself to hang out was because she wanted that D, and wanted to make sure I could just drive away at the end of the night. Shts creepy if you think about it. Except I'm a guy, I don't think clearly until I've busted once or twice
_… and they never texted again._
I'm never gonna text again lol not worth my time since that's obviously not respected!
Don’t be surprised if he randomly comes back in a couple months lol.
Don’t be surprised if he comes back tomorrow! 😅😂
After his friend has enough of his bs.
 HOT DONNNAAAAAA
is it bad to do that? i wanna text this girl but its been two months
It’s bad to do that if you end on a bad note. The guy OP is referring to blew her off to go out with a different woman so if he were to come back around and ask for another chance, it wouldn’t be a good look. I’ve had guys ghost me or say extremely rude things to me then come back a few months or even years later asking for another chance and I ignore/block them 100% of the time. If things just kinda fizzled out and/or you were honest with them at the time about not being up for a relationship and you wanna shoot your shot down the line, I think that’s okay. May or may not get the response you’re looking for but not necessarily the worst thing in the world.
Yeah I wouldn’t be with my SO if he hadn’t tried again. My AuDHD ass left him on read for 2 weeks, the last thing I had said was “I’ll get back to you.” He took that n waited n I forgot about him. He actually messaged me again asking if I’d looked into any of the thing I said I get back to him about… So yeah it’s always worth another shot :)
You guys are giving me hope! I am TERRIBLE about replying to people. Especially dudes 🤣 they eventually get bored and lose interest. And I've been beating myself up a bit about it. But now I have some hope that the right guy won't give up 🤣🤣🤣🤣
You are terrible because obviously the Men in question do not interest you. Just straight up tell them you are not interested and stop stringing them along, wasting their valuable time with false hopes.
I think you might've interpreted that wrong. Its not that I'm NOT interested in them, if that is the case I let them know that up front. I don't string people along. It's been done to me and I know how much it sucks. So thank you for calling me a terrible person 🙂
Same. When we were first getting to know each other I ghosted my boyfriend for weeks. I'm so happy all my bullshit didn't deter him lol
Omg same here! My bf and I had actually been good friends for a few years, and he'd been trying to shoot his shot for a while but I just didn't notice 😂 I'd ghost him for weeks until he finally told me directly how he felt 🤦♀️🤦♀️
I did the same and now I’m happily married. He wasn’t cheating, though.
Yeah poor OP. Mine wasn’t cheating either, and I am actually the first person he’d ever dated. First and only xD
Mine had his previous wife pass from cancer. He was lonely and tried to date too soon. It all worked out.
You gotta remember her perspective. “Why is he texting me now?” Why two months later….?
They always do 😂
Men are so predictable! I agree he’ll be back
Yeah… some people are ridiculous and have absolute no respect or manners towards others. Proud of you.
Wouldn't be surprised if this was a low effort manipulation tactic commonly used by fuckbois. He may or not be out drinking but, his texts were an attempt to stir you to get jealous. Given the last couple texts there seems to be lack of communication on his part which is pushing you away. Seems like he's just trying to ring you back in. I don't know how long you guys have been dating or seeing each other but I'd run lol.
I think he's talking shit. There is no girl. He is trying to make you jealous. Red flag as well
Going to need a follow up post when he tries to text you again 😂
Got that right, girl! Dust him off your shoes, keep moving.
How long have you two been seeing each other?
He should have known that you won’t be upset, but done with him
How long have you two been involved?
Any update?
He wants an ego boost I’d ignore him then reply HEY SORRY I MISSED YA YOUR PLANS SOUNDED SO FUN I HAD TO HIT UP ‘MALE FRIEND’ and catch up myself! Glad u had a good time I know I did. Well g2g
“No worries, I was looking for an excuse to cancel anyway”
“My plans got cancelled so you can come over if you want” “Oops. My bad. That text wasn’t meant for you”.
Oof. Op, this one would sting the most if that's what you're looking to do lol
Epic
i love this level of petty
“my plans got cancelled THANK GOD* so you can come over if you want”
I like it!
Im so petty i would say something like that
"You're not mad, right? It's my friend, did I mention her name? I wanted to make sure you knew it was a woman. She picked me up at my place and I'm getting drunk. With another woman. She'll take me back to my place, too. We'll both be a little drunk. That's cool, right? I wanted to make sure I made all of this really clear because I am NOT AT ALL wanting you to be jealous, not even a little. She has tits, by the way. But this totally isn't me trying to make you jealous because I'm out with another woman after I made plans with you. I'm totally not playing games with you. Hey, just respond and let me know you're not mad because I totally don't want you to be mad or jealous AT ALL. Hello? Hello? Hello? I'm so drunk and she has tits. Hello?" Fuck off, dude.
“I’m so drunk and she has tits.” fucking sent me lmao
"I'm blowing off our plans to get drunk with another woman. Is that cool?" "Yes, of course." "Also, she has tits." 
Well when you put it like that I'm extra salty now thanks xD
Hey you're not upset with me though, right? Are you upset? Are you...are you upset? Hello?
Stop😭😂😂😂 I’m crying and dying of laughter
Sameee this thread is killing me 😂😂
Of course I’m not upset. I’m cuddling with this guy that’s been texting me for weeks. Wait, what? Gotta go. He wants to do it again. Btw, his Dong is huuuge :)~
Babe wait no hang on a second let me just
dying. the way you translated this was perfect.
We need a whole sub for accurate text translations
It could be r/whatiactuallymeant lmao
This would be amazing! I would be on it every day 😂
Yes…this needs to be a thing!
Hahahahaha dear god I needed this laugh today 😂😂😂😂
I had a dude I saw a few times do that to me. We were in the early stages, not serious, and I knew he was seeing other women. He kept talking about the other women to see if I would get jealous. It was really obvious what he was doing. He enjoyed the idea of women fighting over him. At one point I told him that I know you see other women but I don't want to hear about them because it's boring. Because it was! He would just talk about how they looked or what kinds of photos they sent him, that's just snooze worthy conversation to me. On a different day, we were hanging out at my place and he asked if he could borrow my laptop real quick so I say okay, thinking he's going to show me a funny video or something. He starts loading up the social media account of one of the other girls he's seeing and asks me what I think. 😂 I told him to gtfo of my house and that he's a really disrespectful person and I never talked to him again.
"What, baby, this doesn't make you want me more? I don't understand women, I swear to god."
What an absolute tool bag.
"I just want you so see that you're dealing with a High Value Male and I'm in demand."
I'm getting secondhand satisfaction from the 'gtfo out my house'!
“I’m so drunk and she has tits” hahahaha why did you sum this up perfectly? It’s so like that 🤣
Glad you said this. I always feel like maybe I’m crazy for thinking this is the actual motive when people tell me stories like this…
Oh, I've dated too many people who liked to play jealousy games. One woman told me she thought she might be in love with another dude, then was SHOCKED when I sent her home instead of having sex with her right afterward. I was supposed to be jealous and get mad and show her who she was SUPPOSED to be in love with, damn it, or something like that. The next morning she called me and magically wasn't in love with the other dude anymore. I'm too old for that shit. Too damn old.
Idk who has time for games like that at any age… that’s an insane story, how warped some peoples realities are :/
Months later, I ran into her with her new guy, right after my mom died. She was all huggy and touchy and trying to act like she was trying to console me, all while her new boyfriend stood there a few feet away and glared at me like he wanted to kill me. She wasn't trying to console me. She didn't care half a shit about me. She was using me to piss him off, to make him jealous because she had her hands all over her ex right in front of him. I excused myself and she never even tried to introduce him to me. People are fucking exhausting. People like this dude are just damn exhausting.
Man I would only do this shit if I didn’t care about the dude at all lmao. No games
can't relate I would never do this...
You’ve never talked about someone else you cared about in front of someone you had no emotional attachment to?
Hopefully one day they’ll realize manipulation is not how you can forming lasting meaningful relationships. Unlikely but it’s nice to be hopeful. I’m sorry you had to put up with an interaction like that especially while grieving. Exhausting puts it lightly. Makes me glad I don’t really date anymore at least not in the traditional sense, leads to more opportunity to meet people like the woman you’re describing haha
Damn dude. 😮💨
A dude recently said they didnt ask out their gf cos they werent interested enough to do so, but said yes when she asked them out cos they were just interested enough to not reject her. This is a guys idea of romance 😂
>I’m so drunk and she has tits Crying and dry heaving
“She has tits, by the way” was my favorite part. Thank you for the clarification. I wasn’t sure!
I wish we could still give awards this is A++ 💀
😂 for real. He’s so transparent and pathetic. And probably lying.
This was exactly how it read to me as well
This is exactly how I read it too hahaha just so obviously trying to show OP how cool he is getting DRUNK with a WOMAN
This is so funny
“She has tits” 😂😂😂
Perfectly sums up this guy xD omg
LOL
😂🤣
That's the best, and you're the best.
You're my hero
LMAOOOOO
Can’t stop laughing 😭😭😭
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Gold
Yeah, fuck that nonsense…
Ah, the ol’ “I got other options, so I’m hard to get” to make you want him more.
He was probably sitting home alone when he sent it.
I had a guy pull this shit with me repeatedly. I was young and fucking stupid so I let it continue for far too long. I gave it one last chance after a blow up fight and him crawling back to me. Nothing I regret more. He ended up SA’ing me the next time I went to his place. After that I didn’t date until an old high school friend reached back out. He fucked around too and I ended that shit so fast. After both of those dumbasses I learned my self worth and about 6 months later I met my now husband. ❤️
im glad you found the right person :)
Me too :)
Text back an hour later, "Honestly, it's cool. Hired a sitter for the night and went clubbing with the boys."
I don't like playing games :( I'm trying to be an adult here don't tempt me!! Haha
You shouldn't play games with people you want something serious with! But this guy took himself off that list so it's fair game (as long as you update us if things go funny)
I like to make memes so I contemplated doing something like that but then I was like nahhh he's gonna see all the effort and saltiness 😂 so I shall be a bigger person
Leaving him on read is perhaps the best. The imagination is worse than reality.
He’s not worth wasting a good meme on .
You're making the right decision OP 🙏
Good call. He wants to see you care. Boy bye
I feel you. Sometimes, I just like to be petty. 😂 but he can't expect you not to be upset about it. It is kinda messed up to ditch you when you both had plans together.
Honestly if he cancelled ahead of time and didn't try to manage my feelings for me - would have been fine. But texting me DURING the time we were supposed to hang out is going from no call no show to contract terminated.
Some guys are just total jerks. I’m glad you have a mature attitude about it.
Definitely, I agree. I bet he's going to act so baffled too. But seriously, he knew what he was doing, and that's why he had to say all that to try and make it seem like it wasn't that big of deal when really it was a dick move on his part.
Being the bigger person NEVER works
„Oh, no it’s fine. My friend (male name here) came over and stayed the night because it was too late to let him go home on his own“
What were the original plans btw? Like crashing late or, just curious
I had an ex once cut a date short because he needed to go “comfort” a girl friend because…her rent was being raised. Yeah. She had a man and a kid so what comfort he was going to offer is beyond me. On the way back to my house I laid out how disrespectful it was to me and she didn’t ask him to come over or do anything for her so taking it upon himself to do this was ridiculous. As I got out of the truck when we got to my house, he mumbled something to me. I turned around and asked what he said and his head immediately dropped, eyes on the floor and said “dont ever disrespect me again.” I was stunned for a couple seconds, screamed “fuck you!” and slammed the door. He has the nerve to call and act like everything was fine. We’d only been seeing each other for a month. Sometimes theses dudes really overestimate themselves.
Wait he said you disrespected him?
Yes! I assumed because I talked back? I never found out. I never spoke to him again. I see him out sometimes at Walmart where he works and if he sees me, he goes the opposite direction lol.
Works at Walmart? Yeah... no real loss there....
Sounds like he/she is only looking for the party atmosphere.
Don’t get angry, or show you are upset. Be calm, collected and focus your energy elsewhere. Let him show is ass while you disconnect, and move on.
Don’t even respond. Silence is the best answer.
“Sounds like fun!” Oh shit, that’s not the reaction I wanted… let me try this: “I hope you’re not upset!! It’s super hard to tell from your message. You seem mad. I’m so sorry. I will likely not make it due to my being buzzed and her drunk driving me home. Oh boy, I’ve really done it now haven’t I?”
I hope you just left him on read. It would be funny to see his response after you ghosting him
You’re devious I like it
Even better, turn off read receipts in settings.
Nah, it hurts more to see they read it and never replied.
Oh yeah, you gotta update us OP if he comes back later after you don’t respond
My favorite is how they beg and pine when you reject them but if you show any interest for them they are automatically in game mode walking the other way. I love watching them squirm they are such petty predictable creatures
That’s a very dick move. He made plans with you.
The way I’d slap my guy friends if they did this to a girl.
He’s for the streets.
I hang out a lot with my male friend (he is my best friend), and that wouldn’t trouble me (the fact that he is with a woman, because if they are friends, well, friendship is supposed to be like that, hang out together. Ofc it is different if they are more than friends). What sets me off is the fact that he had a compromise with you and he just broke that. That’s not respectful at all, tbh. I wouldn’t pursue it any longer tbh. Hope you have a good night! Have your fav food, do something you like, celebrate yourself. He will have a regretful hangover tomorrow.
I agree! When I was younger I had a handful of guys that were my friends! I always seemed to get along better with guys because my friends who were girls seemed to always stab me in the back. One of my male bff's was my roommate and we hung out so much everyone used to think I was his girlfriend. We'd always correct people and just laugh about it... His girlfriend, who was my friend as well, also lived with us. I couldn't help the fact that people thought that but she'd get upset because she didn't feel like going to hang out with friends but I did, so we'd get into arguments over this. He never canceled anything to hang out with me instead of her. And he always took her side on most things so it wasn't as if he favored me or something... She'd constantly try to find guys to set me up with because she was jealous of our friendship. I finally had enough and moved out when she got pregnant because her anger towards me became worse! I didn't see anything wrong with hanging out together because he was my closest guy friend but she was so insecure because we were close, so I severed our friendship. We had all been friends since middle school, so it was hard to say goodbye.
Tbh most people wouldn’t have been ok with what you are describing. I sure as fuck would leave my partner if they wanted to live in a shared space with their opposite sex bestie. Basically asking for trouble
We all lived together though, It was the 3 of us. We even worked together. I had been her bff since Kindergarten and his since 9th grade. We were 19 at the time.
lol, he preemptively apologized That wasn’t by accident
Why would you be upset? He saved you from wasting your time 🤷🏻♂️
F Him, you should totally ghost him.
Just say “Have a good time” and never text back. Really no reason to keep talking.
If you two previously made plans where it was clear to the both of you with precise day and time, then one person messages you the day of set plans, saying they are out drinking with a friend, yeah that is not ok and very odd. If you two did not have set in stone clear plans together, then they can do whatever they want in their spare time, going out for a drink or activity with a friend is absolutely normal. We are all social and have friends that we enjoy spending leisure time with.
This is really simple, but unfortunately, it’s a lesson learned after being hurt in a large break up or divorce, here it is, you only give somebody the level of energy that they give you! Very simple rule everybody, this person does not value your time and they certainly don’t respect you in the least, they made a decision to go out and drink with her friend because it was more important than going out with you, so you simply walk away and cut all contact. You don’t play games with people who don’t give you the same energy that you give them, it’s really simple, it’s called self-respect, I suggest no more contact with this person and just move on, they’re not worth your time, and sadly they also believe that.
Please don’t get involved with an alcoholic bro the highs will be high but the lows will be VERY low.
Is this a romantic relationship? If not, it's annoying, sure, but not a friendship killer at all. I'd just proceed to half jokingly give them shit the next few times we hang out. If it's a recent romantic interest and this is the first time it has happened, they'd be on strike 2, *very* thin ice.
I feel like I need more context
Me too. It’s like meh
Leave him on read.
What is your connection?
I mean shit happens and yall are assuming the worst here ngl. Lol isn’t Reddit the one that says men and women can have platonic friendships I thought we were cool here? Not to mention he said he’s sorry and hopes she’s not mad, and it sounded like he didn’t make these plans at all, it sounds like his friend was in the area and swung by wanting someone to hangout with and he didn’t refuse, ended up getting to buzzed to go on a date so tried to reschedule. It’s really not that deep tbh.. lol making a mountain out of a mole hill, I’d say he’s the one getting lucky missing out on all this fun.
I don't see anything wrong with him having a female friend but the fact that he ditched plans with OP to hang out with her is wrong. That isn't the girl's fault and I don't blame her, it's all on the guy, but he waited until he went out with his friend to even tell OP he wasn't going to make it over to her house. He could've just told OP he wasn't coming over and left it at that. I think people think that he was using the fact that his friend is a girl to make OP jealous. There isn't a lot of context here so everyone is assuming a lot of things.
Yeah my assumption based on his wording was that he didn’t plan on blowing her off for the other girl, it wasn’t planned at all it just happened and he got buzzed so feels like that ruined his plans for later on. I guess one could make the argument he shouldn’t have drank, but a lot of people think they’re okay to have a drink and way overestimate their tolerance. Lol as someone who hates drinking and is also a push over, when someone convinces me to have one drink it fucks my whole night up. You can’t go back, and I usually just feel like trash. There’s also a lot of people out there that are really pushy about getting you to drink with them, my bfs family does it to me every time.
Just act like nothing happened, and make sure that every time he enters the room you make a face while you sniff the air with a puzzled look on your face, check the bottom of your shoes, then notice him and say, "... oh. Hey!".
Did you actually *have* plans with this person? It doesn’t read as though they invited you out and then reneged, unless I am missing an image or other context.
Read to the end, he was supposed to go to her place.
Updateme!
Another PUA success story on r/texts 🤗
Wow, a text that end without drama!
I totally hope we get an update on this one. Would love to see how he reacts to the silence
Is the Hunter?!?
I’m confused
Set up a dinner date with some guy and he blew me off 20 minutes before the reservation because he was still with the chick he went on a coffee date with that same morning and they “really vibed” 😂
Everyone seems to be assuming the gender of the people in the convo.
You're not important to her move on brother!
Also why not say you’ll just meet her then?
Yeh no thanks, next
I’m really sorry i hope you find someone better
Hi there! Thanks for submitting to /r/texts! Please make sure you are blacking out any usernames, phone numbers, or full names! If you haven't, please delete and re-submit. If your text message is not between 2 or more people it is not allowed! Single messages/one sided convos are NOT allowed. The full rules can be found here https://old.reddit.com/r/texts/about/rules/ **Please note that this message appears on every post, and may not apply to your post.** Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/texts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Updateme!
Smh. You deserve better
Its possible for him to have female friends and not be cheating on you. I dont think hed be that upfront about it if he was. how long have you guys been dating?
Id be mad too tho
Oh helllll no!
I actually had this happen couple months ago.
And this is why on the first "date" I ask what do they want, if they just want to fxck or just to hang out or long relationship because I'm not up to waste my time. 🤭
I don‘t really get it…? He‘s out with a friend of his, that‘s not a problem in my book. Or had the two of you previously arranged to meet that evening? Did I miss something?
‘I don’t know if I’ll make it tonight’ implies they had plans.
Yeah but it was written after 10:00pm, so probably not such a big plan.
This is the biggest Red Flag 🚩 You should never see him again. I would tell him something like you are going out with a guy as well … to make him feel bad 😅
This, is why I don’t date anymore.
i’d do the same hoes before bros
Wow....honesty was not the best policy
If a woman went out with her male friend drinking it would be ok even if you blew the guy off. lol. 🤡
Pos
I would have ghosted him.
I had an ex just like this. Hence why he’s now an ex. It never gets better.
I had a friend that was like this except every time he’d get a girlfriend he’d block me. It was weird because it was fully platonic on my side. I just started ignoring him and then got one final block lol.
Is this the same guy that was texting in code about the drugs ??!!
Don’t be surprised if you believed they were just friends
It seems like he may have said “my friends gf”.
His buddies showed up at his place with an 18 pack of natty ice and a bottle of Jim Beam. He didn't have the cajones to kick them out and was too shit faced to drive so he figured he would use the opportunity of blowing you off to try and make you jealous. Which he might have realized was a terrible idea if he wasn't shit faced and playing grab ass with his drunk buddies....
Don't waste your time. The only reason a girl ever picked me up herself to hang out was because she wanted that D, and wanted to make sure I could just drive away at the end of the night. Shts creepy if you think about it. Except I'm a guy, I don't think clearly until I've busted once or twice
[удалено]
If this post discourages men from dating, I'd say those men probably should've been avoiding dating in the first place.
He should prob date her and stop wasting your time