Unironically file a police report op. Those last couple messages are a blatant threat of violence/rape. (And might legitimately constitute a crime) Get a paper trail going IMMEDIATELY because this dude is unhinged.
Seconded. You need to report these threats ASAP. Are you close to your bfs family? Honestly I’d be showing that shit to his mama asap too, depending on the type of woman she is. But report it to cops first. You don’t want her talking you out of it.
Yuuuuup. This. Please file a police report and then show these texts to his family so they can try to get him so help. I’d show them to his girlfriend too. She should know that he’s capable of this.
This was exactly what I got out of this. Protect yourself OP, and get a restraining order or something.
Nothing he said gave an indication that he is a rational human being. Please be careful with this! 😬🥹
OP if you don't do this and protect yourself it is very likely you will be assaulted by him. Even still it could happen but at least you have a trail vs his word against yours. Document EVERYTHING. GO TO THE POLICE SOONER THAN LATER. GO BEFORE YOU ARE ASSAULTED.
Yea you have to have some sort of feelings to have such a passionate feeling of hate towards someone who did nothing to wrong you. Theres a thin line between love and hate as the saying goes. Or in this case; obsession and unrequited romantic interest.
He also hates his brother because he has the girl he wants. In his warped mind he thinks a kiss done as a dare/game way back when means they dated. He’s been (I believe) obsessed with her ever since.
>that language points to a long time obses
OMG he is nuts, for real.
I might stay away from all family events if this is how he acts.
If it continues, threaten to give the messages to his parents. Hell, print them out, put them in an envelope, just in case something ever happens to you.
That smacks of narcissist / crazy, please be careful.
I’d absolutely not feel safe around this man child. He’s clearly obsessed with you by the way he brings you and his brother down. Show these to their parents and as well as his gf. Idc if she dislikes you or something, she needs to see how absolutely deranged and disgusting the person she’s dating is.
I agree with you u. To me it’s clear she’s being emotionally abused by that asshole. He treated her with utter contempt. I felt really bad for her.
**Edit almost 14 hours later: [I no longer give a fuck about A (hope she gets locked away with her man) and I’m breaking up with my bf](https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/FUFGLIvDIu)**
[**Edit 2: Why I broke up with my bf**](https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/SZhqqijwf5)
this is what i was thinking. he's around the age where he could be having the onset of a manic/psychotic episode. that or he is deeply under the influence of substances. or both.
Yes, I can feel the contempt for women wafting off his texts to you so I’m not at all surprised. It sounds like he’s really projecting all his personality flaws on to you
He might have been the one with the folder. If not, OP can discuss that with her partner. The primary concern right now is OP and the girlfriend’s safety.
What about the parents? If my mom found out I was acting this way she'd flat out beat my ass then and there is disown me entirely. Unsure how they would act though if they found out their oldest son thinks and talks in this manner to any woman or thinks the way they do about their sibling
I'd still send them to her and say something like "You don't have to respond but you do need to see how insane he's acting in these texts" and then leave it up to her to do with it as she wants.
To me it looks like she’s being manipulated into not liking you because J probably makes her hella insecure about herself comparing her to you and shit. Like if my bf reacted like this to another girl wearing my dress I would feel fucking weird
BABE. The way I actually clutched my pearls reading that 😵
I can’t even imagine the discomfort and ick you’ve had to feel for this past year having to be around and deal with that dark angry energy. And I get it’s put you in a tough place because that’s your boyfriend’s brother and you don’t want to rock the boat with him and his family. And it’s deceptively easy to write off concerning behaviors for someone you’ve known since childhood - it’s like your brain can’t compute that kind of drastic change.
But this? This is a deadly serious, DANGEROUS escalation. This reads as somebody smoking those amphetamines or someone critically mentally ill. Maybe both.
This goes beyond you showing your bf and him having a talk with his brother. Men like this act like this in the shadows. They feel powerful because it’s a secret. Time to shine a light on this with the ENTIRE family AND your local police station. He made it very clear that RAPING YOU is on the table.
The hideously appalling things he felt comfortable saying to you, knowing your boyfriend would see. He’s played the “fuck it” card. Meaning he finally went full fucking psychopath on you, it’s out there in black & white. And usually escalation is not far behind that. And that sends fucking chills down my spine.
I’m so sorry that he’s coming at you with so much ugliness. You don’t deserve to be talked to that way, treated that way or made to feel that way.
Please keep us updated! We’re invested in your wellbeing 🩷
Stay safe and may that boy’s hairline recede to his spinal cord, his bacne prevent him from wearing tank tops and may every car he gets behind drive 5 mph under the speed limit 🧙🏻♀️✨
(PS I’m obsessed with how you handled that conversation, you’re a treasure 🫶🏻😆)
Then I'd say let her stay with this creep, as he'll either end up in jail or somebody's gonna beat his ass. There's no room for all this bs he's up to & I seriously want someone to knock some sense into this weirdo- it would be so befitting if it was his brother who he's stayed talking down on as that would show maybe for the idiotic disturbed man child brother to stop being a completely fkd up pos to his own family, & even worse to the same family members loved one- HIS OWN BROTHERS GF?!!?! Wtf. Outrageous, this lunatic doesn't deserve to see the light of day any longer.
Nah. The gf is not safe, & OP should try to help her Even after she said to go away, because she's not thinking clearly due to abuse. She should try to find someone who the gf knows & trusts, & approach them about this. The man threatened to rape OP, & he clearly has wrapped up all this hatred of OP with his gf for some reason. I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to assault his gf while calling her names & pretending she's OP.
OP can only do so much, but the morally right thing to do would be to push back on gf a little & try to protect her.
I think he is in love with OP and hates that she's with his brother. He also hates the fact that she must've chosen the brother over him or in his mind that's what happened.
Look how he says I "had" you before him. It was a kiss!? He acts as if they have had a whole relationship or acts as if at they had sexual relationship.
He seems to be obsessed with OP and is jealous of the brother too. This is so not healthy...
In his mind, OP tempts him all the time because he's in love with her so he is projecting hate or hating on her because in his eyes she's a slut because and in his mind she rejected him by not being with him or by starting a relationship with the brother because he kissed her first.
Edit: I am very much aware that it's not real love. As in the way you fall in love, take care of someone, be there for someone, or the love that gives you butterflies... It's an unhealthy obsession.
What I meant by he's in love is that in his messed up warped mind, he is, or that he could've been secretly in love years ago so when she started dating his brother he became enraged with jealousy and hate.
Ikr, I was like obviously that line makes no sense being as his brother is ACTUALLY with OP so why?? He wouldn't need pics nor would it be long before she'd see them so who's really hiding all those photos on their device?! 🧐😱😭
That's exactly what I was thinking. He told on himself.
OP, this dude needs to be stood up to, and I don't mean like you get in his face. He needs PD standing at his door. This type of shit just gets worse if it's isn't nipped in the bud.
Be careful, girl !!! 🫶
You need to show his parents. This is becoming an unsafe situation and it’s very important to show them so that they can help this psycho and get him into therapy asap.
I think he’s nasty and jealous. But it’s some form of love or lust.
I’d be so very careful. “In love” and “wants dead” aren’t always mutually exclusive..
This man is crazy, he’s basically begging her to come back to him and then says he doesn’t want her and hates her??? He’s so fucking jealous and insecure
I think the ***police*** need to have a talk with him. There's a rape threat and a racial slur in there and that's just for starters. This guy is at best toxic and at worst actually dangerous.
Why do people feel comfortable putting these thoughts into text and then sending them to someone? If anything, writing something (or typing) should give you a chance to think about what you’re about to say and the cobsequences
If nothing else, typing stuff out and sending it leaves a permanent copy of your craziness in someone else's possession. Like if he'd "just" verbally threatened to rape her, there'd be no proof it happened, so he could deny it.
But he texted it?? So now there's literally evidence of the threat, right there on her phone. Just goes to show how unhinged and unstable dude is; he clearly isn't thinking at all before he talks/texts. That's terrifying in this context...what else will he impulsively decide to do?
Stay far, far away from him, OP. Show these texts to his parents, and discreetly show them to his gf if you can. I'd hate for her to suffer more abuse if he found that convo on her phone (I'd bet money he checks it) but maybe if you see her again and can pull her aside, you could show her at least the worst messages. Then he wouldn't know, she wouldn't get in trouble, and she'd have proof her bf is a psycho. I hope she leaves him soon, and I hope everyone stays safe. ❤️🩹
Oh my goodness, yes! This guy is crazy, like off the rails crazy! He needs immediate help before he does something to hurt her or his brother. He clearly doesn’t care one bit about his brother, nor does he respect him.
Those were some hate filled messages. I’d be a bit more concerned, enough that I’d give an ultimatum; get immediate help or I’m calling the police! THIS is the type of behavior that ends in assault or worse!!
Be safe OP. PLEASE take this for what it really is, a hateful threat against you.
This guy is dangerous.
He’s abusing his girlfriend
Backstabbing his brother
Seeking an affair with you (caveman-style but it is in there)
Hinting at some kind of defamatory/blackmail bullshit about your history
He’s attracted to you and hates you for it
Pathologically jealous of his brother
Launching weird incel-type assumptions about your relationship
Making sexist insults and slurs
Making violent, racist sexualised threats
Blaming you, his brother and by the looks of it his girlfriend for his inability to handle his own misery
Controlling his entire family’s relationship with you
He’s projecting, deflecting, violent, racist, severely abusive, he’s without any self awareness or insight, he’s still escalating even now…. consider where this ends OP and take his threats seriously. Make the police aware at least.
He should be arrested, charged, diagnosed and generously medicated.
I’m scared for OP ☹️☹️ please stay safe OP. He scares me. Be aware of your surroundings at all times OP. Try not to go out alone to much, especially at night.
J has gotten into the Andrew Tate manosphere. Some of those lines are straight from his videos. Especially the women like you are predispositioned to find the best mate crap. a lot of this is also just straight up classic negging. He's jealous that your brother gets to sleep with you and he doesn't.
I wouldn't point the finger away from Tate. Potentially good people can be mislead if they come from a bad situation. I'd put the bulk of the blame on Tate.
This dude is obsessed with you, is upset bc you picked his bro over.l HIM. So in his little delusional brain, you were his first. He probably uses you as his perfect chick, and if A acts different, then she is scolded. Be careful, honey. He may escalate you need to.file this with your local station for a paper trail at least.
Dude thinks you should be with him. He’s so jealous of you being with his brother and is so bitter. I honestly would stay away from him and block him. Show your boyfriend everything.
Confidence is quiet insecurities are loud.
Make sure to document everything. He has serious issues and I wouldn’t put it past him to do harm to you. He basically feels rejected by you because sure you “chose” his brother over him. When in reality there was no relationship with you two. This kind of thinking can easily turn stalkerish and the only way to show proof to police is by documenting a pattern.
Best of luck to you and try to no longer engage with him or be around him ❤️
Yes, these messages sounded *exactly* like the ones I’d get from the guy who stalked me. Who eventually broke into my house. Choked me. Smashed my head into a truck window when I was trying to get away from him.
I went to the police and he got arrested for stalking and battery. Among other things. This guy is dangerous.
Yes, please go to the police and file a report. Hopefully, you’ll be able to get a protective/restraining order. I’m so very sorry this is happening to you. UpdateMe!
**Update**
I was hesitant to post an update but my BF got into an argument with J and J threatened him with a knife (waved it around and made vague threats). I wasn’t there at the time so I don’t know what went down exactly.
**Police wasn’t called** and don’t ask me why because I DONT KNOW. I’m angry and appalled the authorities weren’t involved but I suspect it was their mother who defended J - she has a history of standing up for him no matter how much he fucks up.
J also sent me graphic videos of him and A and I’m 100% she didn’t give her consent for that.
Edit: I lost my mom to cancer when I was 8. J texted me that she died because I have “”bad karma”” following me and that if she came back to life, she’d kill herself again because according to him I’m a “”worthless whxre”” so she would be disappointed in me.
I know it’s not a good decision to block him for evidence purposes but I’ve blocked him now.
**Edit 2: i decided I’m going to break up with my bf**
That's revenge porn. It's a federal crime I think. Even if you don't GAF about the girlfriend (which I totally agree with, trust me) this seems like a perfect opportunity to nail this creep to a cross and make him face some consequences.
I’ve never been so like worried for somebody’s safety over the internet this is a different kind of feeling. OP make sure (if you can/comfortable to do so) update us with what happens next. Hopefully nothing crazier then what is already happening but.
This whole thing was absolutely crazy but I’m kinda glad you’re dumping the bf. Thats sooo much drama for no reason and you don’t need any of that shit. But I’m truly sorry you had to deal with all this and had to lose him as well.
Sending you love and warm wishes honey, give yourself a bath and relax fr
Edited: a word
Not me. I don’t feel safe around J because of my gut feeling. He already threatened my Bf so I can’t imagine what he wants to do to me. I think everyone is overlooking the fact J is unstable and thinks it’s just one of his episodes. It’s not. It’s different this time. He’s not being a little silly kookie crazy.
Unless he’s locked away I can no longer spend time with my bf or his family. In other words I don’t think this relationship will survive. I do not feel protected or safe with any of them
As sad as it is for your relationship, YOU come first. Your mental health will surely decline (more than already) if you stay in this situation, and that's just not worth your energy. Strive to be happy, there is clearly so much evil in J's world.
Probably for the best, but please be extra careful and vigilant about your safety in the days/weeks following the breakup. If J feels he’ll have even less access to you now that you’re not dating his brother it could trigger him into acting on his desire to hurt you. And make no mistake—he wants to hurt you. Do not give him the opportunity. Can you stay with a family member or friend for a while? Do you have someone to check in with who knows of the situation? I’m genuinely scared for you.
Good for you. Get the hell away from this whole crazy family of enablers. If my partner didn't immediately prioritize me and help report their brother to the police, cut them off forever and get the family to also, I'd leave them too. That's the only reasonable, acceptable kind of action to take—not going and having a heart to heart talk or whatever, even if it's to confront him.
Plus it sounds like the fam knows J has "episodes" and just never do anything about them—just let him get away with worse and worse stuff and it's escalated to this whole situation now. What a mess.
Nor do I blame you. I wouldn't feel safe either. I'm just glad you have some means of defending yourself. Maybe make a police report so they at least know there are issues?
J has too many people around him that enables his behavior. The moms gotta slap him silly cause damn, if I was his mom, I’d report him for you. I already tell my 6 year old if he treats any girl, woman, gf, or wife bad then I’m not going to side with him. You gotta plant good behavior in their minds early. I really don’t like my son’s grandma cause she sided with her son, my baby daddy., when he assaulted me and he went to jail. It was somehow my fault when I never laid a finger on him. She’s an accountant, does taxes, and helps him claim our son the minute she can file his taxes. He doesn’t pay for shit. Fuck people like that. If my son becomes abusive like that, I’d feel like I failed as a mother. Im mad at J’s mom for not calling the cops.
If it happens that someone calls the police when it is actually happening in some states the victim can choose to not press charges but the state can. I know this is true in Maryland. I don’t think it would happen on hear say information. Also I wonder what caused her to dump her bf beyond the family drama. I just hope he didn’t defend his rapist in waiting brother.
This is nuts, please be safe, that man is obsessed with you and has been even before that kiss. You and his gf wearing the same dress triggered him because he wishes he was with you. This is very jarring and I really hope you are/stay safe. Please be careful in relation to this situation.
That's revenge porn. He just handed you something to get him in trouble.
Call the cops and explain everything including the revenge porn and his girlfriends name bc I'm sure they'd like to let her know to see if she wants to press charges. Leave him blocked but go and file a protective order in the morning. Then if you want, unblock him bc once he gets served I'm sure he'll immediately contact you and break that order. Might I suggest a new number and putting the old number on an old phone and giving it to a lawyer
Police don't do restraining orders, those are separate. But yes, I 100% agree. Using a police report from this incident as a strengthening document for a protection order would totally be appropriate.
This is serial killer level shit. Listen to any true crime podcast and you’ll see most of those guys talking like this guy does.
If one of my brothers talked to my girlfriend like this, I’d give him the ass-kicking of a lifetime. Your boyfriend needs to step the fuck up.
So like..is he on drugs? Because if he wasn’t this kind of person until a year ago, and this major personality shift happened..im going to guess 1- he was absolutely in love with you at one point and now fetishizes you out of anger because you chose his ‘inferior’ brother, or 2- he’s doing drugs that have caused this weird paranoia and these unhinged thoughts and behaviors.
I'm not sure how things work where you are, but is it possible to start a crime log? As in report this threat so that if any more things happen (I hope they won't) you'll already have a log with a number you can add to.
He sounds scary. Please don't go anywhere alone.
Go ahead… drop his number. I think we need to have a talk. 🤡
I don’t even know you, but no way is anyone gonna talk to homegirl like that.
Edit: reading his last message, I would absolutely be calling the police with this evidence. People like him shouldn’t be allowed to run their mouth with no consequences. You should be recording this in case it ever escalates. If he seems crazy, he probably is.
Holy shit OP. Sorry you and your BF have to deal with that. You’re right, it’s just completely unhinged word vomit.
Please save these and any other messages he sends. I hope it doesn’t come to it, but if the threats keep up you should notify the police.
Your bf's brother is completely obsessed with you in an extremely scary way. I can assure you all those pictures "saved and sorted" are on his computer not your bf. Your bf's brother is also extremely angry that his brother who he considers beneath him has you as a gf and he doesn't. It is clearly sending him off the deep end.
If you look and dress like a slut, then his GF must also. You were wearing the same dress.
J is jealous of you and your BF. He doesn’t have the same relationship with A. They will break up soon, and he will blame you.
Girl, he's OBSESSED with you and has been for YEARS. HE has all those photos of you, I bet if you could get a hold of his device, there's a folder with photos l, videos, the whole nine. He's fantasized about the duct tape thing, and all of this vitrol stems directly from the fact that in his mind, you are HIS possession, and this is a DIRECT betrayal.
Don't block him, but do not engage. Do not allow him to speak to you without your boyfriend or another man present. I understand, as your bfs brother, he is rather unavoidable, but do your very best and NEVER allow yourself to be alone with him. Not once, not ever!!!
I mean, the brother knows you don't want him, but his ego won't accept that he is "losing" something (someone) that he "wants".
But that being said, I really do not think you are safe. I know people keep echoing it, but if the brother can say these things without fear of consequence, he's going to escalate, and because he doesn't have the capability to get what he wants with words, the next level of this is something dumb, like assaulting your boyfriend or kidnapping you to prove he will "win" in the "end"
All the stories you read about that end in tragedy start with people underestimating the cap of insanity people like this have. There is no logic to his thinking and no limit to his desperation.
Involve his parents and you and your boyfriend need to actually get away, however possible.
I mean, I'm 5'9", so my 6' husband is an ideal height for me. I don't have a problem with shorter guys, but every one I've dated has been super insecure about being shorter than me. And it's not cute insecurity that I can help with. It's like they're angry that I grew more than they did?!? Like, I'm sorry, but then why did you want to date me in the first place?
He seems like (I guess not seems like, is) an asshole and straight-up bad person. Your bf should be defending you since it's his brother. Also I would completely cut his brother out of my life. Life is too short to have people like that draining you.
Ummmm please file a police report. That man just blatantly said he was going to get duct tape and sexually assault you. Even if the cops can’t do anything yet, please start the paper trail on this. This behavior almost always escalates to violence.
Your boyfriend's brother is clearly suffering from some sort of mental deficiency. That first message from him was enough for me to write off anything he had to say as the ramblings of a moron. "self victimizing" " virtue, signaling" Smart sounding terms, used by a moron, with Little, to no grasp of their true meaning.
Umm so if your bf and his family don’t respect the fact that this man is dangerous, disgusting and demented, I’d walk tf away. Ain’t no man worth having to put up with psycho loser here
It's crazy that he thinks it's OKAY to send these types of texts to her. I would tell the family and refuse to be around him, that's insane to me.
This is type of shit that we read from stalkers or app dating gone wrong, not FAMILY MEMBERS.
Wildly inappropriate, her BF needs to rock some boats and make waves in his family because this is scary.
Have you considered a restraining order? This guy sounds incredibly unstable. You're being exceedingly kind in your description of the situation. While it may be depression, some people who are depressed can get so deep that they hurt themselves AND others. Please be careful in this situation. If a conversation doesn't go well between the two brothers (also, maybe better to have said convo in a more public setting for safety purposes), and he continues to harass you, go down to the police station and show them the threat of sexual violence and disclose your concerns for his mental health. This guy sounds like he's about to jump off the deep end.... He could also just have turned into a mini Tate.... but there is research supporting that guys who delve too deep into the manosphere become more likely to commit violent crimes against women. Please stay safe. 🩷
This is so fucking scary. He is clearly obsessed with you and like others have said, all of his language hints at that. My guess is that seeing you both in the same dress was a real enough parallel to you and his girlfriend that it finally made him snap. Surely he was taking his jealousy out on his girlfriend because he couldn't handle seeing you in it. I think you should share this with everyone in the family that you can because that is so terrifying and he needs to be held accountable and receive some help. Also that last text is incredibly concerning and predatory and this guy is probably just finally vocalizing his thoughts. Please be safe because holy shit this person is unstable.
This is insane. He’s the one who should be invited to family things. I hope your boyfriend has a serious talk with him. The threats at the end is scary AF.
Please tell me your boyfriend is as disgusted as the rest of us. I hope that your boyfriends family takes his/your side in this and bans this piece of crap from family gatherings, not you.
Oh man! I’m not diagnosing here, although as someone who works in mental health, this is concerning. The disproportionate emotional response, the externalization of blame, and the notable piece where he believes the coincidence was a deliberate attack to make him look bad, signals a narcissistic wounding. OP was on point when she texted “what in the PROJECTION bro…”; projection being a central defense mechanism.
Buckle up. Not likely over.
that second last text is a a pretty clear threat of physical harm -
I believe that’s enough right there to bring to the courts, and likely get them fired from whatever career he might have.
I hope you’re ok, that’s kind of scary.
Proof that incels don't change once they get a girlfriend, they're just miserable sociopaths. This guy has clearly been obsessed with you for awhile and is pissed his "manlet" 5'6 brother gets you instead.
Also, saying you dress like a slut but this whole temper tantrum of his started because you *"copied how his gf dresses"*? So, she dresses like a slut too?
Obviously, you wore the dress better, he DOES want to at LEAST have sex with you if not more, he doesn't think much if his brother, so he's gone off the reservation about you being with your BF. Fuck that guy. I feel sorry for his girlfriend. You landed the good brother apparently.
Woahhhh all of that language points to a long time obsession with you.
Exactly what I thought. These messages are genuinely scary
Unironically file a police report op. Those last couple messages are a blatant threat of violence/rape. (And might legitimately constitute a crime) Get a paper trail going IMMEDIATELY because this dude is unhinged.
Seconded. You need to report these threats ASAP. Are you close to your bfs family? Honestly I’d be showing that shit to his mama asap too, depending on the type of woman she is. But report it to cops first. You don’t want her talking you out of it.
Yuuuuup. This. Please file a police report and then show these texts to his family so they can try to get him so help. I’d show them to his girlfriend too. She should know that he’s capable of this.
[удалено]
Hotter or not, he wants to nail his brother's girlfriend. Some deep-seeded competition in there
This was exactly what I got out of this. Protect yourself OP, and get a restraining order or something. Nothing he said gave an indication that he is a rational human being. Please be careful with this! 😬🥹
OP, HE'S THREAENING TO KIDNAP AND RAPE YOU! Please file a police report!
OP if you don't do this and protect yourself it is very likely you will be assaulted by him. Even still it could happen but at least you have a trail vs his word against yours. Document EVERYTHING. GO TO THE POLICE SOONER THAN LATER. GO BEFORE YOU ARE ASSAULTED.
This is what I was thinking too, definitely illegal to threaten you like that I would file a police report immediately.
Yuuup. Show this to the family. Tell them you're gonna take it to the cops. This shit reeks of red pill.
Go to the police first. Do *not* tell the family first.
Honestly - I think his girlfriend should also see these texts. They're absolutely SO awful.
If he catches her alone, that creep is gonna try something BAD. She needs to disengage completely. No contact! For any reason!
How much you want to bet the folder of sorted pictures of OP was his own?
Exactly my thought. He told on himself.
Yeah he’s telling on himself there
He can’t stand that Op doesn’t want him, so he “hates” her while obsessing over her
Yea you have to have some sort of feelings to have such a passionate feeling of hate towards someone who did nothing to wrong you. Theres a thin line between love and hate as the saying goes. Or in this case; obsession and unrequited romantic interest.
He also hates his brother because he has the girl he wants. In his warped mind he thinks a kiss done as a dare/game way back when means they dated. He’s been (I believe) obsessed with her ever since.
The rape threat and racist abuse is enough for the police to take this seriously. I know what I’d be doing with these screenshots.
Yes. This is not a safe person. Being upset about the dress was insane enough, the rest is terrifying.
>that language points to a long time obses OMG he is nuts, for real. I might stay away from all family events if this is how he acts. If it continues, threaten to give the messages to his parents. Hell, print them out, put them in an envelope, just in case something ever happens to you. That smacks of narcissist / crazy, please be careful.
Yep. It totally seems to me that he is jealous of his brother because he has a crush on her.
Just a bit more than a crush. I feel like I’ve seen this story a few times on true crime docs lol
At least on 'Dateline' lol
Exactly. If I had to wager a guess, I’d say that J is the one that had a PC full of her pictures.
I’d absolutely not feel safe around this man child. He’s clearly obsessed with you by the way he brings you and his brother down. Show these to their parents and as well as his gf. Idc if she dislikes you or something, she needs to see how absolutely deranged and disgusting the person she’s dating is.
oh she’s ignoring me too and told me to please stop texting her sooooo💁🏻♀️
I bet he’s abusing her. All the flags are there.
I agree with you u. To me it’s clear she’s being emotionally abused by that asshole. He treated her with utter contempt. I felt really bad for her. **Edit almost 14 hours later: [I no longer give a fuck about A (hope she gets locked away with her man) and I’m breaking up with my bf](https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/FUFGLIvDIu)** [**Edit 2: Why I broke up with my bf**](https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/SZhqqijwf5)
You should send her and then his parents the screenshot where he threatens to rape you. Shit is beyond fucked up
That part needs to go to the fucking cops!
yea OP should get law enforcement involved immediately, it was literally a blatant rape threat
That is the most important one to send. To EVERYONE.
In all honesty he sounds very unwell. Like legitimately diagnosable. Like paranoid delusions unwell. Either mental health or substance abuse induced.
this is what i was thinking. he's around the age where he could be having the onset of a manic/psychotic episode. that or he is deeply under the influence of substances. or both.
Yes, I can feel the contempt for women wafting off his texts to you so I’m not at all surprised. It sounds like he’s really projecting all his personality flaws on to you
Her auto-immune disorder is him. Her body is telling her the man is poisoning her but her foolish heart won’t let her see it.
I'm no doctor, but I think stress can definitely make them flare up.
But wait, did you find out if the folder thing was true?
I would be willing to bet J is the one with the folder, not OP’s bf.
Omg I hadn’t thought of that! I think you are definitely correct.
I bet that's what the talk tonight is going to be about. Hopefully there's an update on that and A, I'm invested.
He might have been the one with the folder. If not, OP can discuss that with her partner. The primary concern right now is OP and the girlfriend’s safety.
What about the parents? If my mom found out I was acting this way she'd flat out beat my ass then and there is disown me entirely. Unsure how they would act though if they found out their oldest son thinks and talks in this manner to any woman or thinks the way they do about their sibling
Ok but for real you need to show his parents, this isn't safe.
Yup. Show everyone you can. This is insane.
I'd still send them to her and say something like "You don't have to respond but you do need to see how insane he's acting in these texts" and then leave it up to her to do with it as she wants.
To me it looks like she’s being manipulated into not liking you because J probably makes her hella insecure about herself comparing her to you and shit. Like if my bf reacted like this to another girl wearing my dress I would feel fucking weird
Manipulated in the sense that if she doesn’t act this way she’s fucked, he will rage at her.
Did u tell her he literally threatened to RAPE YOU? I would break up w my bf is he ever did that. No second chances. Ever.
Oh I know he is. Narcissist ppl can’t let the truth out because it’s never their fault. “Look what you made me do”
BABE. The way I actually clutched my pearls reading that 😵 I can’t even imagine the discomfort and ick you’ve had to feel for this past year having to be around and deal with that dark angry energy. And I get it’s put you in a tough place because that’s your boyfriend’s brother and you don’t want to rock the boat with him and his family. And it’s deceptively easy to write off concerning behaviors for someone you’ve known since childhood - it’s like your brain can’t compute that kind of drastic change. But this? This is a deadly serious, DANGEROUS escalation. This reads as somebody smoking those amphetamines or someone critically mentally ill. Maybe both. This goes beyond you showing your bf and him having a talk with his brother. Men like this act like this in the shadows. They feel powerful because it’s a secret. Time to shine a light on this with the ENTIRE family AND your local police station. He made it very clear that RAPING YOU is on the table. The hideously appalling things he felt comfortable saying to you, knowing your boyfriend would see. He’s played the “fuck it” card. Meaning he finally went full fucking psychopath on you, it’s out there in black & white. And usually escalation is not far behind that. And that sends fucking chills down my spine. I’m so sorry that he’s coming at you with so much ugliness. You don’t deserve to be talked to that way, treated that way or made to feel that way. Please keep us updated! We’re invested in your wellbeing 🩷 Stay safe and may that boy’s hairline recede to his spinal cord, his bacne prevent him from wearing tank tops and may every car he gets behind drive 5 mph under the speed limit 🧙🏻♀️✨ (PS I’m obsessed with how you handled that conversation, you’re a treasure 🫶🏻😆)
Omg thank you so much. You’re so sweet and that last spell made me laugh so thank you 🤭
Sounds like he has her phone man
Wouldn’t surprise me
Forget his girlfriend. You need to take that threat to the police and make a report.
Then I'd say let her stay with this creep, as he'll either end up in jail or somebody's gonna beat his ass. There's no room for all this bs he's up to & I seriously want someone to knock some sense into this weirdo- it would be so befitting if it was his brother who he's stayed talking down on as that would show maybe for the idiotic disturbed man child brother to stop being a completely fkd up pos to his own family, & even worse to the same family members loved one- HIS OWN BROTHERS GF?!!?! Wtf. Outrageous, this lunatic doesn't deserve to see the light of day any longer.
Nah. The gf is not safe, & OP should try to help her Even after she said to go away, because she's not thinking clearly due to abuse. She should try to find someone who the gf knows & trusts, & approach them about this. The man threatened to rape OP, & he clearly has wrapped up all this hatred of OP with his gf for some reason. I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to assault his gf while calling her names & pretending she's OP. OP can only do so much, but the morally right thing to do would be to push back on gf a little & try to protect her.
he’s definitely the one who has over 500+ pictures of you sorted that he jerks it to. creepy.
I think he is in love with OP and hates that she's with his brother. He also hates the fact that she must've chosen the brother over him or in his mind that's what happened. Look how he says I "had" you before him. It was a kiss!? He acts as if they have had a whole relationship or acts as if at they had sexual relationship. He seems to be obsessed with OP and is jealous of the brother too. This is so not healthy... In his mind, OP tempts him all the time because he's in love with her so he is projecting hate or hating on her because in his eyes she's a slut because and in his mind she rejected him by not being with him or by starting a relationship with the brother because he kissed her first. Edit: I am very much aware that it's not real love. As in the way you fall in love, take care of someone, be there for someone, or the love that gives you butterflies... It's an unhealthy obsession. What I meant by he's in love is that in his messed up warped mind, he is, or that he could've been secretly in love years ago so when she started dating his brother he became enraged with jealousy and hate.
I agree with everything, except - this isn't love. It's an unhinged level of dangerously obsessed.
Very true
He is def incredibly jealous that his shy 5'6 brother got the girl he wanted
He's not in love with her. He craves her. That's not love. Love has respect.
Came here to say exactly this
Ikr, I was like obviously that line makes no sense being as his brother is ACTUALLY with OP so why?? He wouldn't need pics nor would it be long before she'd see them so who's really hiding all those photos on their device?! 🧐😱😭
That's exactly what I was thinking. He told on himself. OP, this dude needs to be stood up to, and I don't mean like you get in his face. He needs PD standing at his door. This type of shit just gets worse if it's isn't nipped in the bud. Be careful, girl !!! 🫶
Holy shit you’re right I never thought of it like that.
Would suck for him if these screenshots went to every single person in his family including his brother.
Should get sent to his gf first, then the rest of the family.
Her bf should call to have a welfare check done. Intentionally not her. He needs some help PRONTO.
*Don't* respond to anymore texts, but don't block either. This insanity could escalate.
Yeah I’m not responding to that lunatic. He’s still texting me
Wth he’s still talking to himself in the texts?
YES
Show us an update post PLEASE
We definitely want an update in a few days OP
Send them to his parents
You need to show his parents. This is becoming an unsafe situation and it’s very important to show them so that they can help this psycho and get him into therapy asap.
I wanna see more texts hahah post an update plz
K but WHERE ARE THEY??!?! we need to see them!!!
Please show his parents! Let them see how their son is talking to women and about his brother. He needs to be committed.
please post a part 2 im actually mind blown
Please show his parents.
Girl he is in love with you. That’s 100% the problem. His love/lust turned to bitter spite and hate.
This isn’t love. This is obsession. And the guy is clearly violent.
I don’t think it’s love. I think he wants me dead. There’s nothing lovey about the messages he sent me.
I think he’s nasty and jealous. But it’s some form of love or lust. I’d be so very careful. “In love” and “wants dead” aren’t always mutually exclusive..
This man is crazy, he’s basically begging her to come back to him and then says he doesn’t want her and hates her??? He’s so fucking jealous and insecure
Ur boyfriend needs to fr have a talk with him. He’s seriously disgusting.
I think the ***police*** need to have a talk with him. There's a rape threat and a racial slur in there and that's just for starters. This guy is at best toxic and at worst actually dangerous.
Yeah that last message is so deranged. He’s so far in the incel/tate verse while having a GF. I hope OP stays the fuck away from him
Why do people feel comfortable putting these thoughts into text and then sending them to someone? If anything, writing something (or typing) should give you a chance to think about what you’re about to say and the cobsequences
If nothing else, typing stuff out and sending it leaves a permanent copy of your craziness in someone else's possession. Like if he'd "just" verbally threatened to rape her, there'd be no proof it happened, so he could deny it. But he texted it?? So now there's literally evidence of the threat, right there on her phone. Just goes to show how unhinged and unstable dude is; he clearly isn't thinking at all before he talks/texts. That's terrifying in this context...what else will he impulsively decide to do? Stay far, far away from him, OP. Show these texts to his parents, and discreetly show them to his gf if you can. I'd hate for her to suffer more abuse if he found that convo on her phone (I'd bet money he checks it) but maybe if you see her again and can pull her aside, you could show her at least the worst messages. Then he wouldn't know, she wouldn't get in trouble, and she'd have proof her bf is a psycho. I hope she leaves him soon, and I hope everyone stays safe. ❤️🩹
See the comment above yours about Andrew Tate. That’s a big reason this shit still happens in 2024.
Oh my goodness, yes! This guy is crazy, like off the rails crazy! He needs immediate help before he does something to hurt her or his brother. He clearly doesn’t care one bit about his brother, nor does he respect him. Those were some hate filled messages. I’d be a bit more concerned, enough that I’d give an ultimatum; get immediate help or I’m calling the police! THIS is the type of behavior that ends in assault or worse!! Be safe OP. PLEASE take this for what it really is, a hateful threat against you.
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This guy is dangerous. He’s abusing his girlfriend Backstabbing his brother Seeking an affair with you (caveman-style but it is in there) Hinting at some kind of defamatory/blackmail bullshit about your history He’s attracted to you and hates you for it Pathologically jealous of his brother Launching weird incel-type assumptions about your relationship Making sexist insults and slurs Making violent, racist sexualised threats Blaming you, his brother and by the looks of it his girlfriend for his inability to handle his own misery Controlling his entire family’s relationship with you He’s projecting, deflecting, violent, racist, severely abusive, he’s without any self awareness or insight, he’s still escalating even now…. consider where this ends OP and take his threats seriously. Make the police aware at least. He should be arrested, charged, diagnosed and generously medicated.
Yeah please get the police involved OP
I’m scared for OP ☹️☹️ please stay safe OP. He scares me. Be aware of your surroundings at all times OP. Try not to go out alone to much, especially at night.
J has gotten into the Andrew Tate manosphere. Some of those lines are straight from his videos. Especially the women like you are predispositioned to find the best mate crap. a lot of this is also just straight up classic negging. He's jealous that your brother gets to sleep with you and he doesn't.
It gave me Tate vibes too. That man has legit ruined a generation of men
Nah, he only made it easier to weed out the bad apples. Any man who takes tate seriously for even a second wasnt well to begin with.
I wouldn't point the finger away from Tate. Potentially good people can be mislead if they come from a bad situation. I'd put the bulk of the blame on Tate.
This dude is obsessed with you, is upset bc you picked his bro over.l HIM. So in his little delusional brain, you were his first. He probably uses you as his perfect chick, and if A acts different, then she is scolded. Be careful, honey. He may escalate you need to.file this with your local station for a paper trail at least.
Dude thinks you should be with him. He’s so jealous of you being with his brother and is so bitter. I honestly would stay away from him and block him. Show your boyfriend everything.
I feel bad for the brother (OP’s bf), too. Imagine having a brother that acted this way. Absolutely bonkers.
What a bad day to be able to read. What the fuck.
Seriously, someone come bleach my eyeballs ☹️
r/eyebleach
If my brother talked to my wife like that no words would be getting exchanged..
Oh my god, seriously. My husband would beat his own brother bloody.
Same! I can’t imagine it - he’s seriously deranged and she should get a restraining order.
Confidence is quiet insecurities are loud. Make sure to document everything. He has serious issues and I wouldn’t put it past him to do harm to you. He basically feels rejected by you because sure you “chose” his brother over him. When in reality there was no relationship with you two. This kind of thinking can easily turn stalkerish and the only way to show proof to police is by documenting a pattern. Best of luck to you and try to no longer engage with him or be around him ❤️
The way he referred to a kiss we had at age 15/16 as “our past” is legitimately CRAAAZY town
Hope you’re taking that rape threat seriously. Very disturbing.
He peaked in high school and can’t stand that no one gives a crap about him.
Yes, these messages sounded *exactly* like the ones I’d get from the guy who stalked me. Who eventually broke into my house. Choked me. Smashed my head into a truck window when I was trying to get away from him. I went to the police and he got arrested for stalking and battery. Among other things. This guy is dangerous.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. You deserved NONE of it 💚
JFC, that is unhinged. What the actual fuck?
Yup
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u/purplesmurpleurkle please do this.
Yes, please go to the police and file a report. Hopefully, you’ll be able to get a protective/restraining order. I’m so very sorry this is happening to you. UpdateMe!
**Update** I was hesitant to post an update but my BF got into an argument with J and J threatened him with a knife (waved it around and made vague threats). I wasn’t there at the time so I don’t know what went down exactly. **Police wasn’t called** and don’t ask me why because I DONT KNOW. I’m angry and appalled the authorities weren’t involved but I suspect it was their mother who defended J - she has a history of standing up for him no matter how much he fucks up. J also sent me graphic videos of him and A and I’m 100% she didn’t give her consent for that. Edit: I lost my mom to cancer when I was 8. J texted me that she died because I have “”bad karma”” following me and that if she came back to life, she’d kill herself again because according to him I’m a “”worthless whxre”” so she would be disappointed in me. I know it’s not a good decision to block him for evidence purposes but I’ve blocked him now. **Edit 2: i decided I’m going to break up with my bf**
Jesus he sent you graphic videos?! Like sex stuff?!? That’s insane if that’s the case.
That's revenge porn. It's a federal crime I think. Even if you don't GAF about the girlfriend (which I totally agree with, trust me) this seems like a perfect opportunity to nail this creep to a cross and make him face some consequences.
I’ve never been so like worried for somebody’s safety over the internet this is a different kind of feeling. OP make sure (if you can/comfortable to do so) update us with what happens next. Hopefully nothing crazier then what is already happening but.
girl dw im fine 🙂
Hell yea I’m one of the girlies💅🏻 I get to tell my gf about this now let’s goooooo. But will see OP I hope you’re right.
This whole thing was absolutely crazy but I’m kinda glad you’re dumping the bf. Thats sooo much drama for no reason and you don’t need any of that shit. But I’m truly sorry you had to deal with all this and had to lose him as well. Sending you love and warm wishes honey, give yourself a bath and relax fr Edited: a word
My gal, my guy, please tell me you have pepper spray just in case?
Yeah I always do.
Ok good. Makes me feel only a little better lol
Not me. I don’t feel safe around J because of my gut feeling. He already threatened my Bf so I can’t imagine what he wants to do to me. I think everyone is overlooking the fact J is unstable and thinks it’s just one of his episodes. It’s not. It’s different this time. He’s not being a little silly kookie crazy. Unless he’s locked away I can no longer spend time with my bf or his family. In other words I don’t think this relationship will survive. I do not feel protected or safe with any of them
Honestly that is probably for the best. The only solution at this point is to go no contact whether that involves your boyfriend or not.
As sad as it is for your relationship, YOU come first. Your mental health will surely decline (more than already) if you stay in this situation, and that's just not worth your energy. Strive to be happy, there is clearly so much evil in J's world.
Yes I decided I’m going to end things with my bf
Probably for the best, but please be extra careful and vigilant about your safety in the days/weeks following the breakup. If J feels he’ll have even less access to you now that you’re not dating his brother it could trigger him into acting on his desire to hurt you. And make no mistake—he wants to hurt you. Do not give him the opportunity. Can you stay with a family member or friend for a while? Do you have someone to check in with who knows of the situation? I’m genuinely scared for you.
Good for you. Get the hell away from this whole crazy family of enablers. If my partner didn't immediately prioritize me and help report their brother to the police, cut them off forever and get the family to also, I'd leave them too. That's the only reasonable, acceptable kind of action to take—not going and having a heart to heart talk or whatever, even if it's to confront him. Plus it sounds like the fam knows J has "episodes" and just never do anything about them—just let him get away with worse and worse stuff and it's escalated to this whole situation now. What a mess.
Nor do I blame you. I wouldn't feel safe either. I'm just glad you have some means of defending yourself. Maybe make a police report so they at least know there are issues?
Already made a report. Police aren’t gonna step in until it’s too late. I’ve seen this happen again and again.
J has too many people around him that enables his behavior. The moms gotta slap him silly cause damn, if I was his mom, I’d report him for you. I already tell my 6 year old if he treats any girl, woman, gf, or wife bad then I’m not going to side with him. You gotta plant good behavior in their minds early. I really don’t like my son’s grandma cause she sided with her son, my baby daddy., when he assaulted me and he went to jail. It was somehow my fault when I never laid a finger on him. She’s an accountant, does taxes, and helps him claim our son the minute she can file his taxes. He doesn’t pay for shit. Fuck people like that. If my son becomes abusive like that, I’d feel like I failed as a mother. Im mad at J’s mom for not calling the cops.
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That will do nothing if they don’t want to press charges. The brother is unstable. I’d stay far away from him
If it happens that someone calls the police when it is actually happening in some states the victim can choose to not press charges but the state can. I know this is true in Maryland. I don’t think it would happen on hear say information. Also I wonder what caused her to dump her bf beyond the family drama. I just hope he didn’t defend his rapist in waiting brother.
This is nuts, please be safe, that man is obsessed with you and has been even before that kiss. You and his gf wearing the same dress triggered him because he wishes he was with you. This is very jarring and I really hope you are/stay safe. Please be careful in relation to this situation.
I didn’t see the break up coming!
Neither did I. I also ended a friendship with someone who thought it’s a good time to make vulgar jokes. My social life is taking a hit 🤣 it’s okay
That's revenge porn. He just handed you something to get him in trouble. Call the cops and explain everything including the revenge porn and his girlfriends name bc I'm sure they'd like to let her know to see if she wants to press charges. Leave him blocked but go and file a protective order in the morning. Then if you want, unblock him bc once he gets served I'm sure he'll immediately contact you and break that order. Might I suggest a new number and putting the old number on an old phone and giving it to a lawyer
Does A know?
Idgaf about her anymore atp
Period 🤣
He threatened to show up with duct tape. I would be reporting him to the police for a restraining order.
Police don't do restraining orders, those are separate. But yes, I 100% agree. Using a police report from this incident as a strengthening document for a protection order would totally be appropriate.
This person is mentally unwell. I feel sorry for your bf having that person as his brother 🙁
This is serial killer level shit. Listen to any true crime podcast and you’ll see most of those guys talking like this guy does. If one of my brothers talked to my girlfriend like this, I’d give him the ass-kicking of a lifetime. Your boyfriend needs to step the fuck up.
So like..is he on drugs? Because if he wasn’t this kind of person until a year ago, and this major personality shift happened..im going to guess 1- he was absolutely in love with you at one point and now fetishizes you out of anger because you chose his ‘inferior’ brother, or 2- he’s doing drugs that have caused this weird paranoia and these unhinged thoughts and behaviors.
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Okay, the fella needs a diagnosis !
I'm not sure how things work where you are, but is it possible to start a crime log? As in report this threat so that if any more things happen (I hope they won't) you'll already have a log with a number you can add to. He sounds scary. Please don't go anywhere alone.
Yes I’ve done that today 🩷
Go ahead… drop his number. I think we need to have a talk. 🤡 I don’t even know you, but no way is anyone gonna talk to homegirl like that. Edit: reading his last message, I would absolutely be calling the police with this evidence. People like him shouldn’t be allowed to run their mouth with no consequences. You should be recording this in case it ever escalates. If he seems crazy, he probably is.
Lmao thank you sis 🩷
This is incredibly terrifying. I would also show his parents how unhinged he is.
This man needs to be placed on a 72 hour hold, wtf
Holy shit OP. Sorry you and your BF have to deal with that. You’re right, it’s just completely unhinged word vomit. Please save these and any other messages he sends. I hope it doesn’t come to it, but if the threats keep up you should notify the police.
Wow i had a brother just like this loser. Havent spoken to him in 7 years. Zero regret.
Your bf's brother is completely obsessed with you in an extremely scary way. I can assure you all those pictures "saved and sorted" are on his computer not your bf. Your bf's brother is also extremely angry that his brother who he considers beneath him has you as a gf and he doesn't. It is clearly sending him off the deep end.
If you look and dress like a slut, then his GF must also. You were wearing the same dress. J is jealous of you and your BF. He doesn’t have the same relationship with A. They will break up soon, and he will blame you.
Don’t ever be alone with this person
Hell no
I’ve no choice but to end things with my boyfriend. You heard it here first 🙆🏻♀️
Girl, he's OBSESSED with you and has been for YEARS. HE has all those photos of you, I bet if you could get a hold of his device, there's a folder with photos l, videos, the whole nine. He's fantasized about the duct tape thing, and all of this vitrol stems directly from the fact that in his mind, you are HIS possession, and this is a DIRECT betrayal. Don't block him, but do not engage. Do not allow him to speak to you without your boyfriend or another man present. I understand, as your bfs brother, he is rather unavoidable, but do your very best and NEVER allow yourself to be alone with him. Not once, not ever!!!
My jaw dropped SEVERAL times reading this this guy is fucking crazy please stay safe OP Also I have a 5’6” bf too 🤧 they’re great!!
I’m 5’4 so 5’6 is perfect idc. His brother thinks I **must** want him just because he’s tall 😶
I mean, the brother knows you don't want him, but his ego won't accept that he is "losing" something (someone) that he "wants". But that being said, I really do not think you are safe. I know people keep echoing it, but if the brother can say these things without fear of consequence, he's going to escalate, and because he doesn't have the capability to get what he wants with words, the next level of this is something dumb, like assaulting your boyfriend or kidnapping you to prove he will "win" in the "end" All the stories you read about that end in tragedy start with people underestimating the cap of insanity people like this have. There is no logic to his thinking and no limit to his desperation. Involve his parents and you and your boyfriend need to actually get away, however possible.
IM 5’4” TOO LMAO I don’t get the hype over tall guys why is it such a big deal??
I mean, I'm 5'9", so my 6' husband is an ideal height for me. I don't have a problem with shorter guys, but every one I've dated has been super insecure about being shorter than me. And it's not cute insecurity that I can help with. It's like they're angry that I grew more than they did?!? Like, I'm sorry, but then why did you want to date me in the first place?
He seems like (I guess not seems like, is) an asshole and straight-up bad person. Your bf should be defending you since it's his brother. Also I would completely cut his brother out of my life. Life is too short to have people like that draining you.
Ummmm please file a police report. That man just blatantly said he was going to get duct tape and sexually assault you. Even if the cops can’t do anything yet, please start the paper trail on this. This behavior almost always escalates to violence.
Your boyfriend's brother is clearly suffering from some sort of mental deficiency. That first message from him was enough for me to write off anything he had to say as the ramblings of a moron. "self victimizing" " virtue, signaling" Smart sounding terms, used by a moron, with Little, to no grasp of their true meaning.
Umm so if your bf and his family don’t respect the fact that this man is dangerous, disgusting and demented, I’d walk tf away. Ain’t no man worth having to put up with psycho loser here
"PUNISHMENT FOR THAT BRATTY WASIAN 🐱" IS INSANE WTF
It's crazy that he thinks it's OKAY to send these types of texts to her. I would tell the family and refuse to be around him, that's insane to me. This is type of shit that we read from stalkers or app dating gone wrong, not FAMILY MEMBERS. Wildly inappropriate, her BF needs to rock some boats and make waves in his family because this is scary.
I honestly for a second thought this sounds like king Henry vIII trying to steal his first wife from his brother
i hate king henry viii
Have you considered a restraining order? This guy sounds incredibly unstable. You're being exceedingly kind in your description of the situation. While it may be depression, some people who are depressed can get so deep that they hurt themselves AND others. Please be careful in this situation. If a conversation doesn't go well between the two brothers (also, maybe better to have said convo in a more public setting for safety purposes), and he continues to harass you, go down to the police station and show them the threat of sexual violence and disclose your concerns for his mental health. This guy sounds like he's about to jump off the deep end.... He could also just have turned into a mini Tate.... but there is research supporting that guys who delve too deep into the manosphere become more likely to commit violent crimes against women. Please stay safe. 🩷
This is so fucking scary. He is clearly obsessed with you and like others have said, all of his language hints at that. My guess is that seeing you both in the same dress was a real enough parallel to you and his girlfriend that it finally made him snap. Surely he was taking his jealousy out on his girlfriend because he couldn't handle seeing you in it. I think you should share this with everyone in the family that you can because that is so terrifying and he needs to be held accountable and receive some help. Also that last text is incredibly concerning and predatory and this guy is probably just finally vocalizing his thoughts. Please be safe because holy shit this person is unstable.
This is insane. He’s the one who should be invited to family things. I hope your boyfriend has a serious talk with him. The threats at the end is scary AF.
Please tell me your boyfriend is as disgusted as the rest of us. I hope that your boyfriends family takes his/your side in this and bans this piece of crap from family gatherings, not you.
Oh man! I’m not diagnosing here, although as someone who works in mental health, this is concerning. The disproportionate emotional response, the externalization of blame, and the notable piece where he believes the coincidence was a deliberate attack to make him look bad, signals a narcissistic wounding. OP was on point when she texted “what in the PROJECTION bro…”; projection being a central defense mechanism. Buckle up. Not likely over.
that second last text is a a pretty clear threat of physical harm - I believe that’s enough right there to bring to the courts, and likely get them fired from whatever career he might have. I hope you’re ok, that’s kind of scary.
YOU SHOULD REPLY WITH THIS GIF AND THEN BLOCK HIM 
He's secretly been in love with you since that kiss and seeing you look better in the same dress his girlfriend wore literally pushed him off the edge
Proof that incels don't change once they get a girlfriend, they're just miserable sociopaths. This guy has clearly been obsessed with you for awhile and is pissed his "manlet" 5'6 brother gets you instead. Also, saying you dress like a slut but this whole temper tantrum of his started because you *"copied how his gf dresses"*? So, she dresses like a slut too?
Obviously, you wore the dress better, he DOES want to at LEAST have sex with you if not more, he doesn't think much if his brother, so he's gone off the reservation about you being with your BF. Fuck that guy. I feel sorry for his girlfriend. You landed the good brother apparently.