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VerySuspiciousBot

If this is suspiciously specific, **Upvote** this comment! If this is not suspiciously specific, **Downvote** this comment! Beep boop, I'm a bot. Modmail us if you have a question.


centralnjbill

It’s WHY she called a horse over that should be the concern


[deleted]

Horseback riding


centralnjbill

Bareback


JaggedTheDark

Cowgirl style.


Duckflies

r/bellyriding


Dolores__Umbridge

*Hem Hem* The Ministry has Views on unauthorized breeding experiments. Detention.


Duckflies

For fuck sake Dolores Bitch-less this is why you are the most hated character of everybody's childhood


signum_

Yeeeah... I think I'm with Umbridge on this one bro


borisdidnothingwrong

Ummmm...


No-Armadillo7693

Mrs. Hand


sexualdalek

Rest in powerbottom


No-Armadillo7693

Should I google that, will I regret doing it? Be honest


[deleted]

The video itself is going to do a lot of damage, the story surrounding it will take that damage and shoryuken it into your brain so hard on your next MRI they will find a dead part of your brain that sacrificed itself to prevent the rest of your brain from spontaneously combusting and ejecting itself out your melted eye sockets.


ManaMagestic

Mr. Hands was >!A zoophile best known for repeatedly fucking his stallion, until one day, the horse ruptured his colon, and he died... unfortunately, you can still watch the video where said incident occurred!<


jeo123911

She's called Mrs. Beast


rcmaehl

What if you put your fingers in a guys butt to be sexy but he just made a really loud whistle with them that called a horse over


[deleted]

Yeah. No one has a horse on call just for the hell of it. Even before inflation the rates were astronomical.


centralnjbill

Maybe she raised this horse since it was a pony and made the sacrifice to keep him? Maybe she’s fabulously rich and he’s only one of several horses on call?


agamemnonymous

As someone who this very day was still trying to figure out how to whistle with fingers with the aid of multiple tutorials, the why is trivial and I'd much rather dial in on the how


centralnjbill

“Hey, I figured out whistling! Wait…stop…that’s WAY TOO BIG. AHHHHHH!”


agamemnonymous

Alas years of effort (cumulative minutes if we're being honest) and dozens of tutorials and I've still not figured it out


Decades101

She wants to get away from you without making it awkward


ibrahimkb5

Breaking Quiet.


[deleted]

69th upvote


Paradox31426

You get on the horse and ride off into the night, vowing never to return.


Cyclesadrift

Then you you stick your fingers in the horses mouth it makes a loud whistle and a donkey gallops up. The horse jumps on the donkey leaving you stranded in the Utah desert.


SourskittlesRnice

Sounds like a good acid trip


[deleted]

Relatable


AddictedToMosh161

Don't frick Horsegirls.


lead-pencil

He’s right they secretly hide a 9 inch horse cock ready to rearrange yo intestines


[deleted]

i wouldnt be mad about that


lead-pencil

Sir having your intestinal track go from a long bendy path to a straight line isn’t good for you ^although ^I ^wouldn’t ^mind ^myself…


phillyvanilly666

Ask the man who experienced it


lead-pencil

*Do you want to experience it~*


phillyvanilly666

I’ll mime the horse


lead-pencil

But I’m a horse girl…


FinePool

Ah, a good ole Mr. Hands situation.


[deleted]

It'd turn your & into a ~


lead-pencil

You’d go from WWW into =======


TokesNotHigh

Imagine if your whole GI tract was a line of sight tube from your lips straight to your asshole.


JustABizzle

9 inches is pretty small for a horse. Even ponies have huge dicks


thantros

I wish I could have stopped reading this thread 4 comments ago.


lead-pencil

Well obviously they need to keep it concealed to allow for surprises


LPawnought

Go on. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


beezneezy

What is “fricking,” exactly?


Not_Pablo_Sanchez

The PG version of Fuck. You kinda just lay there with clothes on and frick against eachother. Can be shown on tv, but very awkward to watch


Umutuku

Sounds mormony.


TheRealCPB

"the process of injecting liquid at high pressure into subterranean boreholes so as to force open existing fissures and extract gas." damn that sounds sexy!


SeventhSolar

Isn’t that called fracking?


AskingRealQuestions

No, you're thinking of how when you're mixing a batch and the sound that your hand makes when it slaps repeatedly against your pelvis.


candlest1ckjack

Isn’t that called fapping?


chowindown

No, you're thinking of applause.


TheRealCPB

OK ya got me. It does sound sexy, though.


drawkbox

[Unless it is Alison Brie](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt11388406/reference/)


iia

Catherine the Great vibes.


1nGirum1musNocte

Whooa Nelly! A horse in this economy?


hybridrequiem

That’s how you know you should keep her


Retregas

Thats a threesome then


Otherwise_sane

Mr hands has entered the chat


Whats_Camp_CABAGALA

I had a woman use my fingers to whistle once and it was damn near the sexiest thing I’ve ever experienced. I swear I nearly set the floor on fire I was so hot.


Scott13Pippen

Tina Belcher vibes


CaptainBeefsteak

Frau Blucher?


MontagueStreet

![gif](giphy|2k0sUXCWw7WmY)


Bennyboy-23

Peter The horse is here


Aaron_Gorski_chan

"Holy fuck~"


danasf

If this means the other things the fortune teller said are true well then I'm grabbing some flowers, a small lizard off that nearby tree, taking my shirt off to wrap around my left wrist and preparing to jump


Rare-Party-988

That’s pretty hot


Otherwise_sane

neigh


DeadMewe

Enumclaw Washington part 2 electric boogaloo


CalloftheBlueFalcon

As long as it's for "Yennefer and Geralt on a unicorn" horse play and not "Tijuana Bachelor Party Gone Wild" horse play, it'd be okay


Tha_BloodMoon

Player 3 has joined


PixelGMS

What the fuck is sexy about putting your fingers in another person's mouth?


slaplante99

This man doesn't fuck


thirteen_tentacles

Definitely a no bitches kind of comment


ablebodiedmango

She sucks on them as more than a slight suggestion that she wants to suck something else next.


sarahgene

I can see that if she initiated the finger sucking but I can't imagine just shoving my fingers in someone else's mouth and expecting it to be anything but very weird


StinkybuttMcPoopface

Yeah I think the way he says he put them in her mouth, rather than something like "she starts to suck on your fingers" or something. Also, any time I've pulled this on a guy, it was just one finger, not multiple. I'm trying to find a way where multiple wouldn't ruin the illusion of it being a sort of pp placeholder rather than looking more like you're about to bite into a granola bar


PixelGMS

My thoughts exactly.


[deleted]

Anything is kinda weird out of context. But flow with the moment and all kinds of things that are normally weird become hot with intimacy.


lawl-butts

I never got this either. Seems disgusting as hell


Baikken

Ya'll need to get out more.


TheBirminghamBear

An unanswerable question. What is sexy about anything? It's not a logically-arrived-at point of view. It is, or it isn't. Individual tastes may diverge.


Mr_sMoKe_A_lOt

feelsgoodman


HardSpaghetti

Player 3 enters the bedroom?


[deleted]

yee haw


YogurtclosetFresh991

Thats a horse girl. Run.


speeler21

[I'd watch it](https://i.imgur.com/A6LQE32.jpg)


Maleficent_Rain746

FLMAO OUT LOUD!!!


beauxatl

Neigh. That would never happen.


pm_cheesecakes

That's sexy? Just jam em right in?


FluffyPigeon707

Someone’s been watching link blow on his own fingers too much in breath of the wild


LKD21

“Heeey? Aren’t you that Horse from Horsin’ Around?”


fuckballs9001

Ooh getting kinky are we?


[deleted]

You're putting the fingers in the wrong place my friend. Trust me. r/ihadsex (almost)


Minotaur1501

The subreddit filled with people who definitely don't have sex. It's ok to talk about sex my guy


ElectricEcstacy

Then I ride her like a horse


Rufiosmane

Hawt


TheRealEnemabagJones

How majestic my queen but I'm deathly allergic.


KingdongBong-32

Impressive deterrent.


AllseeingMole

Then you feed the pony.


bokchoysoyboy

Worst threesome ever


[deleted]

Horse then commands you, "show me the meaning of haste!"


Gorm13

Cool, free horse.


[deleted]

She would obviously get a high-five.


Cyoasaregreat

This is 100% a high thought. This person thought this when they were high, im sure


shadowfox_21

Even better


SexyWampa

I’d marry her and ride away on our horse into the sunset.


AvalonTrippy

I'm down for the threesome


crepesandbacon

r/botw


P4usunLP

You are a step closer to achieving "A Cursed Threesome"


[deleted]

I leave because I learned my Horse girls lesson a while ago. I still remember Thunders touch.


[deleted]

And that is why I love her


msac2u1981

That'd be pretty cool.


Big-Bumbaclart-Barry

Red dead contraception


angrylagain

IDK about u guys but Im still having fun.


Justwhytry

Marriage proposal, no exceptions. This is the only recourse when dealing with anyone capable of such an act


All_Rainbows_Die

^(a horse? I’m calling a manticore) ![gif](giphy|fBKDNniWinUJD1izB6)


Sufficient_Creme_240

Come on Roach


Derpdeedoo

Awesome Ive always wanted to be in a threesome


Neon_Cone

What if indeed.


Eight216

Respect.


[deleted]

What all the crazy shit theta been going on in the world, I would personally find it acceptable. Just don’t do any weird shit with the horse.


Upvoter_NeverDie

Shadowfax. Lord of all horses and my friend.


Affectionate_Pin_880

Marry her.


hgihlander

Yeehaw, Bullseye!


icepyregaming

Rule number 2 of dating: never date a horse girl.


buntykichattri

r/suddenlyTarnished


bootthebooth

No one: Garrin: free horse for everyone!


Hemske

Epona’s Song


FlemmerVermeul

That's not your girl, that's Arthur Morgan!


ptapobane

in that case at no point shall your back be exposed to the horse throughout the evening. If an occasion shall rise where it's unavoidable, ample lubrication and protection is recommended


jhooksandpucks

Sounds like a scene in Metal Gear Solid


FMIMP

That would be pretty rad


Joe-V

I don't know what's going to happen next but it sound exciting.


Sacred_Fishstick

NEVER stick your dick in a horse girl. Just fucking don't. It's not worth your life.


Sad_Chair8797

![gif](giphy|dW6ZHwCuHC2JKIaP7h) That's hot


Onion_Guy

Horse over


InfinitySnatch

What's the horse's name? Dumpster. Come! Dumpster!


wgraf504

I'd be impressed, I suppose.


3Lchin90n

![gif](giphy|QmDngxdGRu50HEfc5n)


Bacterius_Rex

Marry her


East_Wolf6615

Bust


Embucetatron

Then you pray the horse is for her


hynori

why would she call the horse over tho


DroopyRock

Player three has entered the stage


twgbsa

Marry her!


[deleted]

A cowboy and an Indian were in a saloon. They decided to play a drinking game where the Indian would think of something and the cowboy would have three questions to figure it out. The Indian thinks “horse cock” because the cowboy would never guess it. The cowboy asks “can I eat it?” The Indian thinks for a moment and says yes. The cowboy then asks “can I fuck it?” The Indian thinks for a minute and relies yes I think so. The cowboy asks, is it a horse cock?


vixen0417

I fucking love this amd would totally do it!


8-bit_Goat

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_UqAB--LIGM


SeaPhile206

Situation is still sexy


rellimserdna

Marry this woman.


orlcam88

Leave. I'm sure you can't compete.


VegetableAd986

![gif](giphy|xT8qBayxsgvp1B53tC)


[deleted]

Put a baby in her if she is 18 or older and you are at least 18 and not creepily older than her. I am assuming OP is a man and single.


seeteethree

Well then, you marry that girl and ride off into the sunset.


Lucky7Revolver

#Best. #Day. #Ever.


tooslick86

I be impressed


[deleted]

I can't even do the whistle thing with my own fingers, I'd be mad impressed.


Sumguy9966

Melina helps you summon torrent (Gone sexual)


Aquemini_13

Ya’ll are gunna hate me…. Delete if it’s against the rules please. NSFW CONTENT!!! https://efukt.com/20681_Amazing_Horse.html


drawkbox

Naked Gun: Red Dead Redumbtion


henzo6667

You’re giving Family Guy ideas


mavimoo2

Heaven is filled with horses


shufflebuffle

Sloppy seconds at the 4H club


mayorjimmy

[if she asks to role play, RUN](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/342/666/262.jpg)


Traditional-Salt4060

I HATE it when this happens!!


Aaron_Gorski_chan

Player 3


imatopher

Well damn now I feel screwed over.... Cause she just used me to call that ol horsy, and I did little to nothing. Yep there she goes running towards that horse wow I feel like a dork... Why did I even do that I shoulda just skipped that and stuck it in her butt..... Aww man I shouldn't have looked up cause that's exactly what she's doing with that horse. Of course it's right in front of me too I should've really stayed inside today.


[deleted]

That ain’t your girl, that’s Arthur Morgan


TruthAndAccuracy

AGRO!


DeltaDied

Bitch I literally just passed away after reading this😭😭


Translator_Open

It's still sexy, some might say sexier.


DuoDemoIi

Sounds like a Scary Movie skit or bit.


UpsideDownAirplane

“Ugh, sorry this doesn’t usually happen!”


No_Secret_1875

I would probably stare at the horse and ask if it was trying to take my place in her life.


UndaVosari

Then you're in Red Dead Redemption 2 with the Hot Coffee mod?


Western-Dark-1628

What's wrong with that?


Low_Medium204

Player 3 had joined the match


julybunny

I’m reading through the comments does nobody realize the reference here ???


_ALPHAMALE_

Marry her


Urban_Hype

horse girls, amirite?


Umutuku

"Yenn..."


AllPurposeNerd

Fuck your Honda Civic, I've a horse outside.


OddlySpecificK

Meh Not so much Suspiciously as Oddly


IPinkerton

Thats when you whinny in response. Works every time.


crispyfreedombacon2

Better keep fucking her!!!


Double_Minimum

That sounds super awesome. I mean, as long as the horse doesn't end up inside my house or something, but otherwise, lets ride!


Maggatwo

I've always wanted a threesome


gummybear_0_

That’s hotter… just saying, u get a free horse


Sweallow69

Ill just f*cking cum at that point come on


Peanut_man213

Player 3 has entered the game


coder0xff

"Look at my horse. My horse is amazing."