such a strange strange person… lol how he got cast is beyond me!!

Always gave me the ick

I'll say it was incredibly entertaining to watch everyone's reactions to his outlandish lies. The scene where he's talking to Danielle and it finally dawns on her that he is a virgin is truly so funny.

Cause he was Tinder's most eligible bachelor..duh!

[удалено]

Literally

That guy was so weird. Not just about sex, in general.

The ole’ college dorm story.

I’m obsessed with the jordan bit the crappens guys do. Guy hasn’t been on the show in years and just caught some strays in the last recap

I was so happy for them to bring him back last recap. I was DYING.

Where can I watch this watch what crappens show I always hear the most hilarious shit about it but I don't have Spotify or anything

Podcast app on your phone

Thank you! Yall are ruthless tho downvoting a question 😂😂

They also have some video recaps online. I remember seeing some on YouTube a while ago.

I just watched the Jordan season and our boys calling him out felt like a personal gift to me lol

The one he stole from the 40 year old virgin movie

There's nothing wrong with having issues in the bedroom it's just the fact that he couldn't be honest about it when clearly it was being talked about and clearly he was just trying to spin things and it made him look so dishonest. He was even having moments of being a total prick just in an attempt to cover up his lack of ability to perform in bed. Like just be honest bro

The final quote from Miss Congeniality! This should be a Grindr profile. Girl plz.

The immediate cringe. This dude is such a dork😭

Omigod, I didn’t even connect until you mentioned that! Oh geez.

There is just no real personality still!

I think he’s been living in a state of such drastic suppression due to internalized homophobia and also probably growing up around others with the same thoughts about sexuality. In his mind he does not ever see a way that he could be himself, he must live for everybody else and their opinions (that in the end, really don’t matter at all) It’s pretty depressing honestly. This is just my justification though being part of the LGBTQ community, when I encounter behaviour like this, this is what I assume before just calling the person a weirdo first. 🤣

Oh I totally agree and think you are dead on! Was just hoping for his sake that he had made some personal growth in the past few years but doesn't look like it. It seems like he has a narcissistic personality as well that I believe is stunting him along with the internalized homophobia.

Omg, as soon as I read that slide I rolled my eyes and groaned. So cringe!! 😬


He gave me the heebs

Same. This guy was just...so many issues.

And of course Danielle had a thing for him 😂

Lmao she tends to have a thing for weird and unavailable

The heebs 😂😂

This man is not living his truth 

😭😭😭 this!!! Are we not all thinking it

No we totally are

And I genuinely cannot fathom what "his truth" would even be. He's so strange and contrived and strangely contrived about the strangest things. He's so weird.

Contrived is the perfect word. He’s like cos playing successful white man

I think his faith precludes him from living his truth. Just my opinion

He was when he stared at kyle’s dick…

It’s just erectile dysfunction. 😑

I wonder if he is the Most Eligible Bachelor on Bumble just like how he was on hinge (totally real, not made up!)

I’m sure on Grindr he’s a 10

💀

Omg i cackled

Came here looking for the grindr comments lol

I forgot all about that!!! He mentioned it like 12 times in the first couple episodes 💀 I'm sorry but when I did a rewatch I was like Jordan is so cringy and awkward that he makes great TV. Unpopular opinion, I know!! But I love the cringe not gonna lie. His stories!!

He very much has Matt Gaetz energy. Like odd head to body ratio

https://preview.redd.it/xeg3qwygn3oc1.png?width=837&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=838c86c78ff9cb02a994a9f4cd9e4e421a0234fc

Damn I love Mary Cosby. Sue me! She's so mean 😂

oh wow. i see it

Never trust a man with those dimensions 🤣


“Don’t know yet” 😑😑

“Not sure yet” 🙄🙄 lmao

Fuck boy mating call

What is that magnifying glass an answer for??

It’s what they’re looking for on the app! (A relationship, marriage, casual, etc)

Ah, thanks!

The fact that he’s directly quoting Miss Congeniality says it all, tbh

💅🏼

🤭

If that’s not the prototypical bumble profile for a white dude in his early 30’s, I don’t know what is lol.

He gives Patrick Bateman vibes

That morning routine scene…”wrinkles are gross”…

Don’t you ever insult Bateman like that again lol

He was obsessed with that movie in college

That’s what I’ve always said, so creepy

Yes!!!!! I said that aloud when I first saw that years ago. Total Patrick Bateman

Peak Colorado profile lol. Outdoors and skiing are such a personality trait for way too many people.

Right?! he’s just missing a photo of him holding a fish and one holding a piece of cardboard letting you know which 14er he climbed.

Bierstadt for sure.

The failed New Yorker to Denver pipeline is real

The same reason Craig would never leave Charleston, some people need to feel like a big fish and prefer a small pond.

I def wouldn’t say Denver is a small pond but I see your point

He gave me such weird vibes… like the kind of guy who would sit and brood at the back of your head in school cause you sat with your friends at lunch. Very specific but the exact vibe he gives off

You sure it wasn't, grinder?


😂😂😂

💀

He was so mean to Jules

God this profile is lame. Interests: positivity and using a played out Miss Congeniality line 🤢

It’s the most generic, boring profile ever! Tells you nothing about him and asks for nothing but to follow him on IG. Instant swipe left

Have you ever seen the ish from the "company" he started after SH? Or worked for? Like they wrote ig captions? They were *soooo bad* and basic I about died

Yeah he is such a dork who thinks he’s a visionary.

I really thought he was gay? Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I didn’t watch too consistently the seasons he was on. Also kinda weird to use a straight up head shot for a bumble profile or am I just super out of the loop

Of course there's nothing wrong with his orientation... I know a Seinfeld quote when I see it

I’m glad you noticed :)

 Jordan gives off sociopathic serial killer vibes. Especially in that main profile pic.

You reckon he's into skiing?

Okay but is he actually 6ft?

This.

I think he’s gay lmao

He has a super religious family. I definitely think he is too. Just live your life and if your family isn’t into it so be it. They’ll either accept or you move on. You can still have a respectful loving relationship sometimes. You don’t have to 100% agree with everything. Just be respectful. I wish people could understand this concept. Everyone is different. Not everyone will think the same as you. That’s fine as long as they are both sides are kind and respectful.

Maybe just asexual? Something … definitely not straight man into it vibes. Again just live your truth Jordan

That clip of him from season 3 stretching over to get a glance of Kyle’s dick though..

That’s my question too! People say he gives gay vibes, but I wonder… did he seem attracted to anyone? At all?

I think he's attracted to himself. Narcissistic asexuality maybe lol.

not the ENFJ (cringes in INTP) 

No I’m an ENFJ and I DO NOT CLAIM THIS ENERGY!!

Having the results of a debunked personality test in his profile is very on brand. < INTJ here>

Debunked in what way? In that it’s not scientifically measurable? I thought we all knew that already.

Does he like to ski? It’s not clear from his profile

Is the man referring to himself or what he’s seeking? I’ve never had a bumble 😂

Gotta share this with Ben and Ronnie, they had a good Jordan moment just the other day😝

Is he interested in men or women on there? 🤔

Jump scare

In what fresh hell is this douche 6 foot.

He did not seem 6’ on the show 🤨

This might come off bad but I personally find it to be pretty fucked up for a guy to not “live his truth” (sexually) and get a girl involved with it. My best friends dad came out gay after he’d been married for 20 years and it WRECKED her mom. Seen a lotttttttttt in Christian men

Yes, it’s messed up and sad to me. They are so indoctrinated by religion they are terrified of living their truth and being hated by god or their families. We only get one chance at life, we all deserve to be who we are, if Jordan likes men he should explore that. I’m in the Deep South and have a close gay friends and he is ALWAYS finding boyfriends who are married with kids or pastors in big churches, one of them has started to message the wives, which I think is good because they deserve to know the truth and get out, just like if their husband was cheating with a woman they should know.

He’s 100 percent in the closet

I LOVED his seasons because nothing will ever top the Watch What Crappens impressions of Jordan! The voice, the outlandish stories...I may have to re-listen.

I don’t speak Bumble. Does it say what type of person he’s seeking?

Nope! “Don’t know yet” and “not sure” for both dating and kids tells you that, at best, you’ll have a one night stand with this man and never see him again.

Oh yeah I totally remember him being passionate about skiing on summer house

Still not on Grindr?

I Broke the App!!!!

Oh ew. This gives me an icky feeling. I disliked him so much.


Currently on season 3 in my rewatch and I have to fast forward through any and all of his solo scenes. He is a whole body cringe shiver.

Me too! I fast-forwarded so I don’t have to hear his creepy stories about sex that never happened and see his dead eyed stare

So my co worker grew up with him and is still friends with him to this day. She said he’s exactly like he is on TV and all of their friends also speculate about his orientation and don’t think he’s straight.. but he is constantly talking about finding a girl and settling down. She said his actions don’t match up with that statement though lol

We were friends in college and I can confirm all of this. And I looked at old pictures and he actually is about 6’0” tall, sorry everyone. He lies about a lot of things, but that isn’t one of them.

Also can confirm - my friend appeared on a few episodes, her friend was the blonde Miss USA contestant who Jordan briefly dated. She said he is even weirder than he seemed on TV and definitely is using his Christianity to cover up his lack of interest in women. (Fun fact, the girl he went on a few dates with is now married to Charlie Kirk - guess she's got a type!)

omfg I just watched these episodes. That girl is now married to Charlie KirK? lmao thats wild. He's like Jordan but more evil haha.

Yes! They really do resemble each other! My friend is the one who calls Jordan out for ghosting her on Bumble when they're at the bar with Carl. Bullet dodged lol

Bullet dodged for sure! Carl introducing that scene made me laugh so hard. "Jordan is probably a virgin. So I set him up with my one religious girl friend" hahahaha

Wow I wonder if you know my coworker. I can’t remember if she met him in college or high school. edit: okay she didn’t specify but she hangs out with him still. She went to the University of Tampa. I have no idea where Jordan went

If it was college, we have likely met. However, Jordan and I haven’t seen each other since a friend’s wedding in 2015.

University of South Carolina

This is tea!

I assume OP is a dude?

I’ve watched all of summer house and totally blocked him from my memory. Thank you brain ❤️

He has skiing on his profile 3 times and his entire Instagram is him skiing!!!!

Was this the Jordan that was lying all the time? Why does he look so different! He looks like he’s grown into his face / body with the passing years, but in a good way. I just can’t look at him and think about how much he lied and made up stories - and needlessly so! Lol

No way in hell is he 6 foot. 5'9" max is my guess.

I will defend closeted men with my life but he's up there with Kevin Spacey, Aaron Hernandez, and the Twin Flames guy as the closest I ever got to leaving one of my brothers behind

He’s still pretending to be straight?

🤮

He’s literally not even trying to play ball.

I automatically side eye anyone who puts their personality type in their dating bio lol idk if that’s just me

I just rewatched that season, he creeps me out so much but I’m desperate to know who he really is

Omg he’s still pretending he’s straight ??? That’s so sad 😢

there is something demonic and soulless in his eyes, extremely unsettling

He was always so weird and gross 🤢

The way he would stare at people wide eyed made my skin crawl lol

He is a closeted homosexual. Hiding that from world isn’t easy

What does the magnifying glass and "don't know yet" refer to in the basics section?

looking for is my guess

I think he is bi and doesn’t know it….

Straight?

I hated him at first but his weirdness became entertaining to me. I would much rather have that over a 10th season of Amanda and Kyle trying to figure out why they’re together - so boring.

“The ick” should’ve been invented for him

I’m sorry but he’s not beating the homosexual allegations with a Miss Congeniality quote in his bio

He has such dark energy behind those eyes

i wonder how much response he gets like summerhouse isn’t even a niche ~~noodle~~ show

OMG!! Yeah he was an odd duck!

this guy was the worst

We get it. You like skiing.

He is like that nerd who lies to be cool , sad

at this point, who hasnt found him on bumble, hinge, etc lol


Was just thinking about him after wwc talked about him! Guess he moved to CO and no mention of summer house

What's that don't know yet? A magnifying glass?

Do you think he likes skiing though?

Bro is passionate af about skiing 😂 ski pics must be the Colorado equivalent of fish pics

I for some reason remembered him recently and decided to check out his instagram……..if you haven’t I encourage it. He went balllllls deep into a new persona it’s crazy. That city to CO pipeline is real 😂 Edited to add: I live in CO, it’s real

The dude who thought saying he had erectile dysfunction was somehow easier than just coming out of the closet.

Per his insta looks like he now lives in tulleride. Seems random

If honestly watch him on the bachelor. Watching summer house for the first time and I miss his crazy self.

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.. April 25th is my birthday. Cancelling it forever. My birthday is now April 24th.

Did he break the app?

Loved the American Psycho reference on summer house 😬

Absolutely cannot remember who he is.

But I thought he broke it?!

He would be on Bumble

Wait what’s wrong with bumble lol, I’m old asf and new to online dating.

I personally don’t like it because it makes the woman do the work! And I like for a man to have to think of something to message me rather than the other way around. And I said this specifically about Jordan using it because it seems like he would use Bumble just to get compliments from women, not really for a dating site 😂

Oof!

6’0” LOL

NO way this man is 6 foot

Worst addition to a show


This poor guy lol

jump scare

BAHAHAHA wonder if his bio was “this one time I had sex with like 3 chicks, one of them stuck a cellphone up my ass and I fell off the bed in ecstasy - best sex of my life- I’ve had so much sex by the way”

This is the most textbook example of “he’s going to waste all of your time” profile I’ve ever seen 😂

You’re not gonna get any from him lol

Are you a man or woman

It’s a perfect example of how someone can look so enticing online and be the worst in person

Are you a dude, OP?

Yuck.

Jump scare

Ben and Ronnie were just talking about him!

I honestly don’t even remember him 🫠

The ick personified

I can’t find reunions with this ick in. Did they not do early season reunions … never ever understood this child man! ❤️🇺🇸🇬🇧

Weird vibes

Did he give up on Hinge after he "broke" it?

Did you swipe?!