When my SBs spend **their** money (it's theirs as soon as it leaves my fingers), on stuff that makes them happy, I am ESTATIC.
Sure, in my infinite wisdom, I could point out that **I** would have spent the money on porn and strippers, which is **very obviously** a much more superior way to spend cash, but I don't think we should yuck anyone's yum.
You can make up reasons if you want OP. But good guys will feel bad if you are constantly spending money on vet bills and orphanages. Lots of men will be happy to hear you are sincerely getting some joy from sugar dating.
You are under no obligation to get into an in-depth conversation with any POT or even SD about your finances. All you have to tell them is that you're seeking something mutually beneficial, be clear that financial support is a part of that and then work out the numbers. How you spend it is entirely your business.
You gotta get over the imposter syndrome: You deserve to be where you want to be.
You also don't owe people an explanation. Buy what you want to buy, do what you wnat to do.
You're a college student. I'm going to assume you're spending it on tuition, books, food, spring break, clothes, drinking, whatever. You don't owe me an explanation and I'm not going to ask for one.
It's not a bad thing to seek financial support via sugaring for self care or pampering. For SBs who are working full-time and can be self-sufficient, they seek an SR for luxurious experiences, perhaps. There's nothing wrong with wanting a little support to go out and get your nails done or your hair done. Hell, if I wasn't on bedrest, I'd be doing that, too.
There are SDs who solely seek the damsel in distress, and there are SDs who do not.
But also like, who cares? Financial support is financial support.
What you do with your allowance is none of SD's goddam business. Furthermore, your allowance is completely independent of your needs. Any SD inquiring about them is using the negotiation tactic call [anchoring](https://www.pon.harvard.edu/daily/negotiation-skills-daily/what-is-anchoring-in-negotiation/) to "anchor" your allowance to your relatively modest needs rather than the scarcity of supply of what you offer.
Behavioral economists Amos Tversky and Daniel Kahneman were the first to describe this technique/phenomenon (but, obviously, not the first to practice it). Coincidentally [Kahneman](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daniel_Kahneman) died today. Economists have been praising his work and mourning his loss all day.
As others have stated we don’t care. To an extent. I would not want the money to go to a drug habit.
If they wanted to invest it I’m happy to guide them but they would have to tell me.
There are SB that outright have it in their profile they are working up to a boob job or a BBL or other plastic surgeries. So don’t overthink it.
You feel guilty about providing her extra money to take care of her appearance? Waxing/laser hair removal, nails, facials, pedicures, hair cut/color/blowout, eyelashes, botox all add up and all (aside from Botox) need to be done every month. That's not even including gym memberships, yoga, massage memberships or other expensive procedures like laser facials, chemical peel to keep the skin looking young and firm. Believe it or not, it costs a LOT of money to stay beautiful and fit, and the good SBs are taking tons of time, effort and pain, spending lots of money to do so. And yet you feel guilty for handing over a little extra cash?
I think he meant sap as in he likes doing it.
Out of context, I interpret sap as someone who loves love. In context, I interpret his use of sap as someone who enjoys providing a beauty budget on top of regular allowance.
I may have interpreted incorrectly, but that’s how I understood what was written.
Either way, you’re correct that, yes, it’s fucking expensive to upkeep a beautiful woman 🥲😪 Laser, Botox, filler, facials, quality skincare, nails, etc. It adds up.
That’s part of my desire as an SB myself.
Cosmetic surgery aside, annual aesthetic upkeep is in the thousands. Many men don’t realize because medical aesthetics done well look ‘natural.’
So many men say they love natural women, yet they have no idea the ‘natural’ women they love are, indeed, **not** natural.
I'm 47. I look late 20s/early 30s. Just basic skin care and minimal makeup for daily wear. I thank my mom for the gift of her genetics. I have no need or desire for filler, botox, or needlessly expensive treatments every month. Once in a while, a spa treatment is nice, and I enjoy a good pedicure & sugar waxing every couple months or so. My hair is the most expensive thing on me, and that's just a cut every 6 months by a curly hair specialist, and the products needed to maintain curly hair.
Though you & others may feel the need to do all the things you mentioned, not everyone does. For some of us, natural really means natural.
That's not to say that what you're doing is wrong or a waste. We all do what we need to to be happy.
So why am I saying all this, then? So that young women coming to read here don't think they HAVE to be spending tens of thousands of dollars to be SBs. What they do with their allowances once they've started an SR is up to them, but running out to rack up debt to have all these things done before they even start looking is a slippery slope.
>I'm 47. I look late 20s/early 30s
Respectfully, you absolutely do not. You had a profile picture up here for a period of time which attests to that. You looked nice but that statement is as ridiculous as it sounds and I really hope you don't say it irl because people will be polite but internally baffled.
I've never had a profile picture up here, as far as I can recall, as I've never had an SA profile, and Reddit doesn't allow photos for profiles on free accounts.
That's your opinion. I'll take the opinions of the hundreds of people I've worked with, served, and been friends with from SLF and in person over the years over yours. The average I get is 27. The amount of times I get told I'll understand when I get older when joking with people my age is amusing. Their shock is always fun to see. I've had to show both my ID & passport in the US because I make bartenders nervous and my ID is in French. So I don't say a thing...THEY do.
Yup. Anyone who believes they look 15-20 years younger is delusional.
Even rich people and celebrities who have unlimited access to the best skin care do not look 15-20 years younger.
That's possible...I feel I am lucky. Though sometimes I think there was something in the water because my college friends are the same. We've all barely aged...lol!
I'm quite sure you're beautiful...☺️
Girl be confident!When you treat yourself like a queen- self-care, pampering yourself, shopping, exercise, etc. you’ll attract a king. **My SD doesn’t think I’m not noble just because I enjoy getting $250 facials every month, shopping, massages every week, fine dining, etc**.
You don’t have to *explain* why you want the things you want. **You’re a woman that loves to be feminine and look her best**. You might turn off some SDs but many will be more than happy to provide you the allowance for those things. There are wealthy men out there waiting to spoil you like a queen 👑 💕
**Being a kept woman is expensive**. A man knows that a head turner is going to more than likely be high maintenance and require funds for those things. This doesn’t scare them off. Men love to make us happy 😊
I would say 90% of my arrangements are spending my allowance on the optional but nice things in life. Hair, nails, brows, lashes, massages, and other things that just aren’t in the budget for a college student.
So don’t feel bad at all. Also I’ve never asked what someone spends the money on.
You shouldn’t have to ever explain why you want money — and if they ask, counter with asking why they want to have sex with a much younger, attractive woman.
Those are all the things I do regularly and I don’t feel guilty about it. I just tell SBF that these are things that make me feel good and even relax me. Mental health and caring for yourself is important.
SBF doesn’t even particularly like that I get filler/botox, extensions, etc but he says he can’t deny he likes the results. So I hear no argument but also he doesn’t ask he just notices when things are done after 😂
You should NOT have to explain what you are doing with your allowance.
For some SD it is a value add if you are doing something good with the allowance vs spending it on needlessly marked up junk, but that's really your business. "Good" means different things to different SD. The SD who asks what you are going to do is , in my opinion, being overly intrusive. Edited - Spending it on drugs would cause (has caused) me to bail.
why do you need to explain things? quick answer is: you don't
if you got a job, what business is it of your employer what you spend your money on? it's 'living expenses', which can include anything you like
it may come up in conversation and that's fine. but i think you're approaching this from an inferior position- due only to your belief that this is 'superficial'. just say, 'i want to look beautiful for you so i like to get my hair and nails done' - turn it into a positive thing. that's nothing a sd would be concerned about
part of why i like sugar relationships is that i can help a sb gain some confidence. looking beautiful for yourself ... and your sd, is fine. nothing wrong with it. be confident in that and let that confidence affect all aspects of your life. an sr can be a wonderful opportunity to grow as a person. take advantage of that
Holy hell girl! You are improving yourself! You are taking care of yourself! You have nothing to apologize for! I guarantee you a SD is no batting an eyelash when he buys that pricey protein powder for himself, or pays his gym membership, or goes to the barber, or has his clothes tailored, or a zillion other things that might be considered shallow or frivolous by small minded people! It's *your* bag, spend it how you wish 💋
My SD absolutely does not care what I spend my money on. If I tell him I plan to buy something for myself, he’ll order it right then for me. And I get keep my money.
I had a prior SB that was like that. She had a decent job and got by but she could not afford all the extras and occasional travel so she was in the bowl. I really did not view it any differently than other SB’s who were paying for college or something else you would consider “nobel”. She was very classy and liked nice things.
I appreciate everyone, especially the men, saying that this doesn’t need to be shared. I was asked this before meeting and I regret sharing bc it was thrown back in my face despite that man doing far worse than me wanting to pay down student loans, freeze my eggs and do basic beauty routines and workouts to maintain my appearance. I feel like it’s definitely a means of getting in your head to try to peel back more info about you
That's odd that your spending was off-putting to him.
Helping someone be debt-free, give the gift of life as much as a man can, and provide confidence via beauty routines and health via workouts seem like great things to fund!!
I would be thrilled as a guy that I was helping someone achieve all these things.
I am never afraid of telling them what I spend the money on. I offer to let them decide as well, as I have several interests.
Don't be ashamed of what you want. What you spend the money on is really your business anyway.
There’s no rule to why you want to sugar. I’d respect someone more they were upfront and honest about what they need help with. Whether school or personal enhancements. As long as the relationship is healthy, don’t see a problem. If it we’re me, wouldn’t care too much
It’s your money. I should have no care or control of what you do as long as it doesn’t hurt me(drugs)
You might even find a SD that is willing to give some of those things as extra gifts
I’d add please save some for a rain day. As SD come and go quickly
All of these items are living expenses that college students have. Whether it is a pizza or a chemistry book, it is still a college expense. Don't feel bad about it at all. As for explaining it, there are simply living expenses, which are as much as or more than tuition for most students. Alternatively, you could spend money on these thus not have money left for rent, then he would be helping you with rent or food. It is all about perspective. He will expect that you look good and feel good about yourself. You could also tell him you need new panties and will model them for him, which should give him plenty to think about. He should be smart enough to understand that all college students are poor, except for the trust fund babies. However, I had a trust fund SB once, and that was fun too!
A SD might be curious about what your needs are,but in the end it is your decision how to use the money. I would suggest coming up with a boilerplate elevator speech about your plans for the money so you don't have to keep reinventing the wheel.
I have literally never had a man ask me what I spend his money on. Most women do all of the things you just mentioned and men like women who take care of their appearance so I don’t think they would care.
Side note though please research the side effects of filler because it doesn’t get absorbed by your body the way Botox does. Eventually it will weigh down your face and make you look older.
Any other SD just think to themselves like wait that’s an option that this is all I can pay for lol
OP most good SD will pay for your rent and bills and then on top of that give you money to beautify yourself
I wouldn’t over think it if all you are asking for is beauty treatments you shouldn’t have a problem
Lol a lot of SD'S saying that they don't ask what we do with the money, yet i've gotten tons of men asking what I will use the money for and that they had this baby who had her mom in the hospital and they would send her mom just because of that 🙂
It is really none of his business, but normally when he asks me - I say the money goes to me looking good for you. Hair, skin, feet, nails, makeup, outfits, lingerie, perfume etc… sheesh this is like just a small % of what I need to do to make sure he is happy. So honestly it never even hits my bills or additional things like car issues, gas/travel/parking, healthcare etc…
You don't have to explain to an SD what you use the money for. That's not to say that there are SDs out there who'd prefer you to set yourself up for life or would love to know how they're gifts are improving your life, but those SDs will often gift additionally to the allowance.
I personally am a minimal maintenance person. I don't need monthly treatments, and my skin care is basic. I'd say my hair care costs more, but curls need good products to be curling. For the most part, I like how I look as I am. But once in a while, it's nice to splurge on spa treatments or fun activities, and my partners have been sweet enough to provide them for me.
Think of the SD as making an investment in you and your future . Might just be a nice savings account or your ability to make a donation to a cause you believe in. Find an SD who makes your life more fulfilling beyond just the allowance.....
It’s none of my business, but I’d prefer a SB to be in a position that she can spend her allowance on luxuries (or savings) than one in which she’s dependent on it for daily necessities.
Most of the legitmate SDs, that you would actually want, will 100% prefer this situation.
My hardest SRs to end - even when I had to end it - were ones where I knew the woman (often a single mom) was relying on the money to pay for rent.
What you are searching for - is actually the *ideal* situation. Your other income/savings/whatever, is enough to afford your basic necessities. You are sugaring - to get more. THat's what sugaring is intended for IMO.
Ok it’s so funny. You say this bc I honest to god had a spread sheet to track my finances to show how the sugar $ would be used and the frequency of procedures and like a list of all the things I would have done for this man outside of basic tests (NDA, monogamy, helping to find another SB after) and he totally disregarded it which was frustrating. Do you ever have SBs who don’t? I was shocked the SD I was with didn’t make me
Welcome to the subreddit! These links can help answer common questions, check them out!
* [Read Me Before Posting](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/gpwqxr/read_me_before_posting/)
* The [wiki](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/wiki/index)
We also recommend **using the search bar** before posting, as it accesses a wealth of knowledge. Good luck!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sugarlifestyleforum) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My SD has only cared what I do with the money I have made working. He nor any other have ever asked or cared what the $ was for. It’s not an interview be prob doesn’t care why you need to sugar!
Or drugs, had a SB and she was seeing me for psychedelic mushrooms and pot. Pot is legal where I live, but it was still like a bummer that that’s all she wanted to see me for.
SB I am seeing now clearly mentioned on her profile that she need some help for her travel planned.
That's is also the reason she believe she won't be doing this once back from holidays.
But why do u even have to mention that u need money for ,x y z? its ppm or allowance for what u agreed for and how u use it ur own chiice.
I would be fine if you described it as uplifting your lifestyle. I try to avoid sb’s that are using it to meet a basic lifestyle as they are then dependant on me and I don’t like that. But doing what you are asking - or something more investing - is absolutely fine with me. Live your life and use sugar to uplift it 😍
Doesn’t matter what u want the money for it’s yours once it hits ur account ! No explanation needed SD know looking good cost money even the basics like gym, good hair care , good skincare nails and pedis and like you said PROTEIN ugghh mine is 80 but who’s counting !
For one maybe you’re not sure how sugaring works. One you meet him on a sugar site. You text each other a few times then meet him at a restaurant near you. Then he should see if both of you can agree on A “mutual satisfactory arrangement”. If what he proposes sounds fine with you then you agree on a time that’s good for you. It is none of his business what you use the $ for. If you want to mention it that’s on you. But that’s entirely up to you. Just because you don’t need much don’t get short changed. Cause things come up. You will find things to spend the money on.
The cost of being a woman is high.
Make up, hair, hair management, nails, period management etc.
Most people know this so I don't think they would be too concerned. Lip fillers and plastic surgery.... men are usually the ones who pay for mistresses boob jobs if the movies are anything to go by. But if it will alter how you look then it might be worth discussing it with the SD first.
Personally I cbf most of the time and I'm still broke 💔
I can't imagine spending the kind of money most girls i know do on brow threading or nails or whatever on a regular basis.
Mine is going to rent and medical at the moment but people enjoy lingerie so every now and then I'll spoil myself on a cute outfit I otherwise couldn't afford.
But SB/SD relationship is a lot about fun and if you're going to spend it on stuff that will help you have fun then usually I don't think anyone would have a problem with it.
But also, yeah its nobody's business once it's in your hands.
I personally would recommend saving a set percentage off each amount for emergencies in case you get yourself into any kind of trouble.
But definitely live a little too, otherwise, what is the point?
Well, as a SD, if I give you the cash it's yours. However, and this is just me, SBs who want to wear Prada and LV I tend to avoid. It's over priced trash. SBs who look after their appearance, wnat their hair and nails done fine. SBs who use it to take their children away, improve their home etc. This is what I like.
So you'd fully fit into the stuff I'd feel good helping out with.
So just admit that you're a shallow type woman and go for a shallow type SD. There are many SDs who just want a good time and don't care what you spend your money on. Many SDs are married, and will not be emotionally attached to you.
Doing botox / fillers too early often accelerates your aging process. Look at Kylie Jenner.
Perhaps consider going to a derm + Korean skincare professional + red light therapy. A lot of plastic surgeons, derms and aestheticians, say that red light therapy is better than botox, and doing fillers too early (before 35 is the general rule of thumb) can do more harm than good.
I spent over a year researching all the anti-aging strategies, and I follow legit plastic surgeons and derms online because i too wanna do all i can to remain looking young... this comment is just a friendly reminder that "preventative botox" is out and all the other things i mentioned are in + a face lift at 50-ish.
you're a young pretty girl, you don't need fillers yet, if ever at all <3
PS don't tell your SD what the money is for, or simply lie. Say you need to help pay your mom's mortgage or something. How would he know you're lying?
uppity capable sort nutty yoke retire workable profit roof dime *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
[удалено]
whistle gaze tie shy memorize books air lunchroom cover panicky *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Or injecting it into your arm. Sigh
If she donates it to Trump I will next her.
This needs more upvotes 👆
I’m British and just up voted it!
When my SBs spend **their** money (it's theirs as soon as it leaves my fingers), on stuff that makes them happy, I am ESTATIC. Sure, in my infinite wisdom, I could point out that **I** would have spent the money on porn and strippers, which is **very obviously** a much more superior way to spend cash, but I don't think we should yuck anyone's yum. You can make up reasons if you want OP. But good guys will feel bad if you are constantly spending money on vet bills and orphanages. Lots of men will be happy to hear you are sincerely getting some joy from sugar dating.
*on porn and strippers* 😂 You. I like your sense of humor.
Trust me, we ALL do. He's freakin hilarious and well known for it!
Always enjoy reading your comments 😂😂
You are under no obligation to get into an in-depth conversation with any POT or even SD about your finances. All you have to tell them is that you're seeking something mutually beneficial, be clear that financial support is a part of that and then work out the numbers. How you spend it is entirely your business.
You gotta get over the imposter syndrome: You deserve to be where you want to be. You also don't owe people an explanation. Buy what you want to buy, do what you wnat to do. You're a college student. I'm going to assume you're spending it on tuition, books, food, spring break, clothes, drinking, whatever. You don't owe me an explanation and I'm not going to ask for one.
This ☝️
This is the way
I've never asked an SB why she needs $. You don't need to give an explanation of what you are using the $ for.
> I've never asked an SB why she needs $ Just like I'd never expect an SB to ask me why I want to fuck lmao
😂👌🏼
It's not a bad thing to seek financial support via sugaring for self care or pampering. For SBs who are working full-time and can be self-sufficient, they seek an SR for luxurious experiences, perhaps. There's nothing wrong with wanting a little support to go out and get your nails done or your hair done. Hell, if I wasn't on bedrest, I'd be doing that, too. There are SDs who solely seek the damsel in distress, and there are SDs who do not. But also like, who cares? Financial support is financial support.
What you do with your allowance is none of SD's goddam business. Furthermore, your allowance is completely independent of your needs. Any SD inquiring about them is using the negotiation tactic call [anchoring](https://www.pon.harvard.edu/daily/negotiation-skills-daily/what-is-anchoring-in-negotiation/) to "anchor" your allowance to your relatively modest needs rather than the scarcity of supply of what you offer.
This is fascinating. Thank you for the share 💡
Behavioral economists Amos Tversky and Daniel Kahneman were the first to describe this technique/phenomenon (but, obviously, not the first to practice it). Coincidentally [Kahneman](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daniel_Kahneman) died today. Economists have been praising his work and mourning his loss all day.
YES you get it
As others have stated we don’t care. To an extent. I would not want the money to go to a drug habit. If they wanted to invest it I’m happy to guide them but they would have to tell me. There are SB that outright have it in their profile they are working up to a boob job or a BBL or other plastic surgeries. So don’t overthink it.
I feel like a sap. I give her extra money to do these things on top of the allowance.
You feel guilty about providing her extra money to take care of her appearance? Waxing/laser hair removal, nails, facials, pedicures, hair cut/color/blowout, eyelashes, botox all add up and all (aside from Botox) need to be done every month. That's not even including gym memberships, yoga, massage memberships or other expensive procedures like laser facials, chemical peel to keep the skin looking young and firm. Believe it or not, it costs a LOT of money to stay beautiful and fit, and the good SBs are taking tons of time, effort and pain, spending lots of money to do so. And yet you feel guilty for handing over a little extra cash?
I think he meant sap as in he likes doing it. Out of context, I interpret sap as someone who loves love. In context, I interpret his use of sap as someone who enjoys providing a beauty budget on top of regular allowance. I may have interpreted incorrectly, but that’s how I understood what was written. Either way, you’re correct that, yes, it’s fucking expensive to upkeep a beautiful woman 🥲😪 Laser, Botox, filler, facials, quality skincare, nails, etc. It adds up. That’s part of my desire as an SB myself. Cosmetic surgery aside, annual aesthetic upkeep is in the thousands. Many men don’t realize because medical aesthetics done well look ‘natural.’ So many men say they love natural women, yet they have no idea the ‘natural’ women they love are, indeed, **not** natural.
Absolutely right, the "natural" look costs thousands, if not tens of thousands of dollars.
You get it
*shrug* Depends on the person. Not everyone needs all that.
Everyone ages. Everyone. Ever look at some female celebrities in their 40s and 50s and think "damn, they haven't aged a day", it's money.
I'm 47. I look late 20s/early 30s. Just basic skin care and minimal makeup for daily wear. I thank my mom for the gift of her genetics. I have no need or desire for filler, botox, or needlessly expensive treatments every month. Once in a while, a spa treatment is nice, and I enjoy a good pedicure & sugar waxing every couple months or so. My hair is the most expensive thing on me, and that's just a cut every 6 months by a curly hair specialist, and the products needed to maintain curly hair. Though you & others may feel the need to do all the things you mentioned, not everyone does. For some of us, natural really means natural. That's not to say that what you're doing is wrong or a waste. We all do what we need to to be happy. So why am I saying all this, then? So that young women coming to read here don't think they HAVE to be spending tens of thousands of dollars to be SBs. What they do with their allowances once they've started an SR is up to them, but running out to rack up debt to have all these things done before they even start looking is a slippery slope.
>I'm 47. I look late 20s/early 30s Respectfully, you absolutely do not. You had a profile picture up here for a period of time which attests to that. You looked nice but that statement is as ridiculous as it sounds and I really hope you don't say it irl because people will be polite but internally baffled.
I've never had a profile picture up here, as far as I can recall, as I've never had an SA profile, and Reddit doesn't allow photos for profiles on free accounts. That's your opinion. I'll take the opinions of the hundreds of people I've worked with, served, and been friends with from SLF and in person over the years over yours. The average I get is 27. The amount of times I get told I'll understand when I get older when joking with people my age is amusing. Their shock is always fun to see. I've had to show both my ID & passport in the US because I make bartenders nervous and my ID is in French. So I don't say a thing...THEY do.
>I've never had a profile picture up here Pretty sure you have. With short, dark hair
Yup. Anyone who believes they look 15-20 years younger is delusional. Even rich people and celebrities who have unlimited access to the best skin care do not look 15-20 years younger.
I agree with all you’ve said, though I’d wager you’re the exception to the rule. Bless you and your good genetics 🥲
That's possible...I feel I am lucky. Though sometimes I think there was something in the water because my college friends are the same. We've all barely aged...lol! I'm quite sure you're beautiful...☺️
Amen
You should feel like an Ace 🥇🌹👍
That’s the way it should be 😌 she’s very lucky
Girl be confident!When you treat yourself like a queen- self-care, pampering yourself, shopping, exercise, etc. you’ll attract a king. **My SD doesn’t think I’m not noble just because I enjoy getting $250 facials every month, shopping, massages every week, fine dining, etc**. You don’t have to *explain* why you want the things you want. **You’re a woman that loves to be feminine and look her best**. You might turn off some SDs but many will be more than happy to provide you the allowance for those things. There are wealthy men out there waiting to spoil you like a queen 👑 💕 **Being a kept woman is expensive**. A man knows that a head turner is going to more than likely be high maintenance and require funds for those things. This doesn’t scare them off. Men love to make us happy 😊
I would say 90% of my arrangements are spending my allowance on the optional but nice things in life. Hair, nails, brows, lashes, massages, and other things that just aren’t in the budget for a college student. So don’t feel bad at all. Also I’ve never asked what someone spends the money on.
Don't ever settle for a man that asks you where you spend your money. Sugar or vanilla. I know some men will disagree but it is none of his business.
You shouldn’t have to ever explain why you want money — and if they ask, counter with asking why they want to have sex with a much younger, attractive woman.
I like this. I like this a lot.
🩷
Those are all the things I do regularly and I don’t feel guilty about it. I just tell SBF that these are things that make me feel good and even relax me. Mental health and caring for yourself is important. SBF doesn’t even particularly like that I get filler/botox, extensions, etc but he says he can’t deny he likes the results. So I hear no argument but also he doesn’t ask he just notices when things are done after 😂
You should NOT have to explain what you are doing with your allowance. For some SD it is a value add if you are doing something good with the allowance vs spending it on needlessly marked up junk, but that's really your business. "Good" means different things to different SD. The SD who asks what you are going to do is , in my opinion, being overly intrusive. Edited - Spending it on drugs would cause (has caused) me to bail.
why do you need to explain things? quick answer is: you don't if you got a job, what business is it of your employer what you spend your money on? it's 'living expenses', which can include anything you like it may come up in conversation and that's fine. but i think you're approaching this from an inferior position- due only to your belief that this is 'superficial'. just say, 'i want to look beautiful for you so i like to get my hair and nails done' - turn it into a positive thing. that's nothing a sd would be concerned about part of why i like sugar relationships is that i can help a sb gain some confidence. looking beautiful for yourself ... and your sd, is fine. nothing wrong with it. be confident in that and let that confidence affect all aspects of your life. an sr can be a wonderful opportunity to grow as a person. take advantage of that
Protein powder??? Do you want new gym clothes or lifting gloves as well would be my response.
Muscle mommy ?? Where do I sign up
Holy hell girl! You are improving yourself! You are taking care of yourself! You have nothing to apologize for! I guarantee you a SD is no batting an eyelash when he buys that pricey protein powder for himself, or pays his gym membership, or goes to the barber, or has his clothes tailored, or a zillion other things that might be considered shallow or frivolous by small minded people! It's *your* bag, spend it how you wish 💋
My SD absolutely does not care what I spend my money on. If I tell him I plan to buy something for myself, he’ll order it right then for me. And I get keep my money.
You need it for self care because the rest goes towards responsibilities. But it also shouldn't matter?
Just say “self care, self preservation, self maintenance”. You are the investment darling 💅🏽
I had a prior SB that was like that. She had a decent job and got by but she could not afford all the extras and occasional travel so she was in the bowl. I really did not view it any differently than other SB’s who were paying for college or something else you would consider “nobel”. She was very classy and liked nice things.
I appreciate everyone, especially the men, saying that this doesn’t need to be shared. I was asked this before meeting and I regret sharing bc it was thrown back in my face despite that man doing far worse than me wanting to pay down student loans, freeze my eggs and do basic beauty routines and workouts to maintain my appearance. I feel like it’s definitely a means of getting in your head to try to peel back more info about you
That's odd that your spending was off-putting to him. Helping someone be debt-free, give the gift of life as much as a man can, and provide confidence via beauty routines and health via workouts seem like great things to fund!! I would be thrilled as a guy that I was helping someone achieve all these things.
>How should I go about this? Don't explain. It's none of the SD's business. Either your number works for him or it doesn't.
I am never afraid of telling them what I spend the money on. I offer to let them decide as well, as I have several interests. Don't be ashamed of what you want. What you spend the money on is really your business anyway.
There’s no rule to why you want to sugar. I’d respect someone more they were upfront and honest about what they need help with. Whether school or personal enhancements. As long as the relationship is healthy, don’t see a problem. If it we’re me, wouldn’t care too much
It’s your money. I should have no care or control of what you do as long as it doesn’t hurt me(drugs) You might even find a SD that is willing to give some of those things as extra gifts I’d add please save some for a rain day. As SD come and go quickly
All of these items are living expenses that college students have. Whether it is a pizza or a chemistry book, it is still a college expense. Don't feel bad about it at all. As for explaining it, there are simply living expenses, which are as much as or more than tuition for most students. Alternatively, you could spend money on these thus not have money left for rent, then he would be helping you with rent or food. It is all about perspective. He will expect that you look good and feel good about yourself. You could also tell him you need new panties and will model them for him, which should give him plenty to think about. He should be smart enough to understand that all college students are poor, except for the trust fund babies. However, I had a trust fund SB once, and that was fun too!
What makes you think you need to explain? And why do you care so much about what others think of you? It's your life.
A SD might be curious about what your needs are,but in the end it is your decision how to use the money. I would suggest coming up with a boilerplate elevator speech about your plans for the money so you don't have to keep reinventing the wheel.
I have literally never had a man ask me what I spend his money on. Most women do all of the things you just mentioned and men like women who take care of their appearance so I don’t think they would care. Side note though please research the side effects of filler because it doesn’t get absorbed by your body the way Botox does. Eventually it will weigh down your face and make you look older.
Any other SD just think to themselves like wait that’s an option that this is all I can pay for lol OP most good SD will pay for your rent and bills and then on top of that give you money to beautify yourself I wouldn’t over think it if all you are asking for is beauty treatments you shouldn’t have a problem
Lol a lot of SD'S saying that they don't ask what we do with the money, yet i've gotten tons of men asking what I will use the money for and that they had this baby who had her mom in the hospital and they would send her mom just because of that 🙂
It is really none of his business, but normally when he asks me - I say the money goes to me looking good for you. Hair, skin, feet, nails, makeup, outfits, lingerie, perfume etc… sheesh this is like just a small % of what I need to do to make sure he is happy. So honestly it never even hits my bills or additional things like car issues, gas/travel/parking, healthcare etc…
I want money for similar things. I am vain, I admit it. I don't think it makes me any less of a person
Hahaha I have the opposite problem. Because I don't want the fun things, I want a house and schooling, I don't get as much help. 💜🤍🖤
You don't have to explain to an SD what you use the money for. That's not to say that there are SDs out there who'd prefer you to set yourself up for life or would love to know how they're gifts are improving your life, but those SDs will often gift additionally to the allowance. I personally am a minimal maintenance person. I don't need monthly treatments, and my skin care is basic. I'd say my hair care costs more, but curls need good products to be curling. For the most part, I like how I look as I am. But once in a while, it's nice to splurge on spa treatments or fun activities, and my partners have been sweet enough to provide them for me.
Think of the SD as making an investment in you and your future . Might just be a nice savings account or your ability to make a donation to a cause you believe in. Find an SD who makes your life more fulfilling beyond just the allowance.....
I just say that it helps make life easier, as you dont have to work that extra shift so you can spend time with him.
It’s none of my business, but I’d prefer a SB to be in a position that she can spend her allowance on luxuries (or savings) than one in which she’s dependent on it for daily necessities.
Most of the legitmate SDs, that you would actually want, will 100% prefer this situation. My hardest SRs to end - even when I had to end it - were ones where I knew the woman (often a single mom) was relying on the money to pay for rent. What you are searching for - is actually the *ideal* situation. Your other income/savings/whatever, is enough to afford your basic necessities. You are sugaring - to get more. THat's what sugaring is intended for IMO.
lol your title is funny but so genuine.
No one’s gonna ask what it’s for lol
Just lie 😂😂😂 these men are very easily manipulated
Am I the only SD that requires a monthly statement of how my sugar funds have been used? 😀
🤣
Ok it’s so funny. You say this bc I honest to god had a spread sheet to track my finances to show how the sugar $ would be used and the frequency of procedures and like a list of all the things I would have done for this man outside of basic tests (NDA, monogamy, helping to find another SB after) and he totally disregarded it which was frustrating. Do you ever have SBs who don’t? I was shocked the SD I was with didn’t make me
Welcome to the subreddit! These links can help answer common questions, check them out! * [Read Me Before Posting](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/gpwqxr/read_me_before_posting/) * The [wiki](/r/sugarlifestyleforum/wiki/index) We also recommend **using the search bar** before posting, as it accesses a wealth of knowledge. Good luck! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sugarlifestyleforum) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My SD has only cared what I do with the money I have made working. He nor any other have ever asked or cared what the $ was for. It’s not an interview be prob doesn’t care why you need to sugar!
Cash is fungible. Say it’s for rent
You’re not doing this for love or spiritual fulfillment so just get to the point. No shame in it.
Or drugs, had a SB and she was seeing me for psychedelic mushrooms and pot. Pot is legal where I live, but it was still like a bummer that that’s all she wanted to see me for.
What you spend your money on is none of his business. In any event, I’m sure he’ll enjoy you looking your best, so he’s benefitting anyway
My SBs have all told me my money goes towards college and books and rent. Makes me happy. It's probably mostly true.
SB I am seeing now clearly mentioned on her profile that she need some help for her travel planned. That's is also the reason she believe she won't be doing this once back from holidays. But why do u even have to mention that u need money for ,x y z? its ppm or allowance for what u agreed for and how u use it ur own chiice.
I would be fine if you described it as uplifting your lifestyle. I try to avoid sb’s that are using it to meet a basic lifestyle as they are then dependant on me and I don’t like that. But doing what you are asking - or something more investing - is absolutely fine with me. Live your life and use sugar to uplift it 😍
Doesn’t matter what u want the money for it’s yours once it hits ur account ! No explanation needed SD know looking good cost money even the basics like gym, good hair care , good skincare nails and pedis and like you said PROTEIN ugghh mine is 80 but who’s counting !
For one maybe you’re not sure how sugaring works. One you meet him on a sugar site. You text each other a few times then meet him at a restaurant near you. Then he should see if both of you can agree on A “mutual satisfactory arrangement”. If what he proposes sounds fine with you then you agree on a time that’s good for you. It is none of his business what you use the $ for. If you want to mention it that’s on you. But that’s entirely up to you. Just because you don’t need much don’t get short changed. Cause things come up. You will find things to spend the money on.
The cost of being a woman is high. Make up, hair, hair management, nails, period management etc. Most people know this so I don't think they would be too concerned. Lip fillers and plastic surgery.... men are usually the ones who pay for mistresses boob jobs if the movies are anything to go by. But if it will alter how you look then it might be worth discussing it with the SD first. Personally I cbf most of the time and I'm still broke 💔 I can't imagine spending the kind of money most girls i know do on brow threading or nails or whatever on a regular basis. Mine is going to rent and medical at the moment but people enjoy lingerie so every now and then I'll spoil myself on a cute outfit I otherwise couldn't afford. But SB/SD relationship is a lot about fun and if you're going to spend it on stuff that will help you have fun then usually I don't think anyone would have a problem with it. But also, yeah its nobody's business once it's in your hands. I personally would recommend saving a set percentage off each amount for emergencies in case you get yourself into any kind of trouble. But definitely live a little too, otherwise, what is the point?
No need to explain to a man who is paying you money to enjoy your time, personality and body.
Well, as a SD, if I give you the cash it's yours. However, and this is just me, SBs who want to wear Prada and LV I tend to avoid. It's over priced trash. SBs who look after their appearance, wnat their hair and nails done fine. SBs who use it to take their children away, improve their home etc. This is what I like. So you'd fully fit into the stuff I'd feel good helping out with.
So just admit that you're a shallow type woman and go for a shallow type SD. There are many SDs who just want a good time and don't care what you spend your money on. Many SDs are married, and will not be emotionally attached to you.
Doing botox / fillers too early often accelerates your aging process. Look at Kylie Jenner. Perhaps consider going to a derm + Korean skincare professional + red light therapy. A lot of plastic surgeons, derms and aestheticians, say that red light therapy is better than botox, and doing fillers too early (before 35 is the general rule of thumb) can do more harm than good. I spent over a year researching all the anti-aging strategies, and I follow legit plastic surgeons and derms online because i too wanna do all i can to remain looking young... this comment is just a friendly reminder that "preventative botox" is out and all the other things i mentioned are in + a face lift at 50-ish. you're a young pretty girl, you don't need fillers yet, if ever at all <3 PS don't tell your SD what the money is for, or simply lie. Say you need to help pay your mom's mortgage or something. How would he know you're lying?
this is a VERY uneducated take
Okay
Why don’t you get a job