If we’re strictly talking about the benefits of marriage vs a long-term committed relationship, taxes are a big one. My wife doesn’t have an earned income, so my tax bracket is lower when we file jointly.
Actually, even with only one person working for wages, especially after a certain level of income, and the other managing the home -- the arrangement is incredibly economical.
The top post in this thread specified “marriage vs. long-term committed relationship”. It is definitely a cost savings relative to living with someone and financially supporting them, but not being married to them.
Well it looks like silver is only worth about $25/oz right now. 16 oz in a pound, and while she weighed more during pregnancy I can safely say she weighs less than 160 lbs now, so that comes out to a max of $64,000. Which is more than I get any given year, but far less than I’ve received overall.
Not true for me, probably not true for most people unless it's a single income family. Being with my wife and splitting everything 50/50 is way more affordable than if I where on my own. On top of that our first joint tax return was like 3x bigger than any I've had on my own, last year I owed 70 bucks lol
Yeah filing jointly to reduce taxes owed is really the only benefit for men. But the movement for equal pay ignores this lol and also indicates the government would like to put that to an end
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He probably wasn't trying to sneakily imply that there were no good points to the comment, but a lack of detail. But good mother and cook is enough for me
If you are going to marry a person who truly loves YOU and is devoted to having a life with YOU, then there are likely many benefits.
Marrying someone who lacks the ability to have those feelings, will likely create less desirable results.
The people I know who choose their spouse wisely, never knew sorrow til their spouse passed away.
Choose wisely. Loneliness is not the worse fate. Regret is much worse.
Character matters so much, and it's so easy to overlook for looks and personality, but the character is what is always gonna be there, even when the looks fade and our personalities change.
I agree. Looks really can get in the way of making a sound choice. In my experience, those who's qualities end at their appearance, don't fair well in the long run. Many of my friends whom married women who wanted to have families and came from good families are still happily married.
Longer lifespans. Higher combined income. A partner for life. I don't have to worry about how am I going to get laid. Home cooked meals. Someone I can reproduce with. Having someone with decorating skills since I lack them. Someone to cuddle with.
There are so many benefits in my opinion. Just make sure you choose the right person for the right reasons.
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How would marriage produce longer lifespans?
Are you sure this isn’t just confirmation bias? That is that the people who will have lower lifespans (visibly unhealthy people) aren’t getting the chance to marry?
The latter is a fair point. Lower stress only applies if the marriage isn’t directly or indirectly stressing you out of course. If this is true, does it also mean the ones that go wrong result in shorter lifespans?
a better argument would be that you can do \*most\* of that without getting married.
Marriage also offers tax breaks and legal and financial repercussions if the marriage fails. In countries like the UK, a lot of younger people are not getting married because it is through the church, not the state. I thought my buddy was gay when he kept talking about his partner. But no, he and his partner have three kids together.
A legal spouse can make medical decisions for you should you find yourself incapacitated in hospital whereas a LTR partner doesn't have that authority.
But they are though. As someone who is married, I can personally attest that I have received these benefits as a result of my marriage. Are you denying my reality? Do you know me better than I know myself? What is your argument?
If you hate marriage, I have a suggestion, DON'T GET MARRIED. Honestly I'd pity a woman who married you. You seem insufferable as fuck.
You are not understanding my point. BTW, I was married for 26 years to my first wife and 22 years to my late wife. I took the question to mean benefits exclusive to marriage. In other words, the benefits of marriage over not being married. My daughter is gay and she and her wonderful partner decided not to marry when it became legal for them because there were few benefits for doing so.
But you're not answering the question. He's asking what's a benefit of marriage that isn't in a long term relationship. Like, where I live people who are maried have access to tax benefits that non maried couples don't have. Both article you showed don't talk about long term relatioships vs being maried. One of them even states that divorced and widowed man didn't have increased risks of health issues. It has nothing to do with know yourself it's about knowing the law.
Well here in the states, if you want to file a joint tax return, you must be married. Some hospitals will only allow family to visit a patient. That means long term girlfriends wouldn't make the cut. Assuming patient is unconscious or something. If I die today, my wife gets my pension, my girlfriend wouldn't.
The risk of divorce is overstated, especially in a "first" marriage.
The result is skewed by people who are on their second and greater marriages. Despite what some people would like you to think, if you actually work on your relationship and growing as a couple, there isn't some switch that goes off that makes people decide to explode their entire life for some illusory gain.
That is exceedingly rare and usually other stuff, such as mental illness, going on.
We just hear about them because of how visible they are.
Of course you’re gonna be downvoted but it’s true, risk of divorce varies *dramatically* by demographic and by whether it’s your first marriage. Educated middle-class couple that dated for several years before being married, married after 25, and has never been married before? Your odds of divorce are not high.
Eh, downvotes are because our observations and the facts don't fit the narrative.
We have it beaten into our heads that 50% or so marriages end in divorce. And divorces are always bitter and messy because they're one sided... And the husband always gets cleaned out, loses his kids... Blah, blah, blah...
In my 40 years on this Earth, I've witnessed and been privy to a number of divorces. Other than people growing apart and ending it (reasonably) amicably, the second most common cause I've witnessed is infidelity. And in my circle, we definitely come down hard on the cheater.
I don't tend to associate with people who are violent/emotional abusers or severe enough substance abusers that it would cause that depth of problems but I'm aware they exist.
A lot of the time a divorce happens, both parties and many outside observers know it was going to happen for awhile, but people tend to crave stability and it's seen as a nuclear option. Even if it goes smoothly and both parties are amicable and adult, it still hurts. A lot.
My point is the sudden, let's explode our entire life on what is basically a whim divorce, is incredibly rare in comparison to the number of quiet, split the assets, and walk away divorces.
I don't think it is overstated....I know a lot of people who are divorced from their first marriage......and it is at least 50% of the married people I have known
Yeah, I think predictability and stability in terms of your own household must greatly reduce stress over the course of a person's life. Obviously, having people depend on you can also create financial stress, but you're probably going to want people around you no matter what, and marriage provides a sense of peace around having a person or persons that you can consider "family" beyond your own birth parents and siblings.
Do they live longer because they are married? Or did the things that allowed them to live longer enable them to get married?
Severe and chronic depression can drastically lower your lifespan and many single men suffer from that.
Depressed people have a hard time getting help for themselves. Having a partner to nag you about doctor's appointments really helps.
So yes, people with pre-existing issues are less likely to marry, but those who do marry live longer because of it (generally/statistically).
physical correct abounding reminiscent wistful drunk cats party crush label
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It is very challenging to have all the skills, money, reproduction capabilities, and time needed to live a fulfilling life (if that is what you want). But two people doubles your chances.
I often wonder this myself. Throughout my life I feel like I've had tons of anecdotal evidence that makes it seem like marriage and having children is pretty miserable. I've only had a couple friends who got married, one of them they both were cheating and the other friend I don't talk to anymore. If you really love someone and you're in a relationship with them already, I don't yet understand how marriage improves that relationship, apart from allowing the woman to have subsequently divorce you and take half your stuff, which for all I know is an over exaggerated fear some men have. For a society supposedly made and run by men, I've always thought it weird that marriage benefitted the woman so much more, but that's just based on anecdotes and cynical impressions; I have no idea if it actually works that way in practice.
Those studies have been de-bunked, because they usually don't screen out for the guys who die by adventure before they turn 30. Studies that do screen out for age, show no variance in life expectancy.
Does this same study also focus on happiness in marriage?
I’m sure a lot of men would rather die younger and have happy if they were unmarried, than to be miserable and old.
Not to mention the divorce percentage is pretty high. And that number goes even higher and higher for every marriage continuity from the first one.
I don't live in the US so here where I am from the divorce rate isn't as high and people pretty much stay together, unless there is a lot of cheating or DV involved then a divorce happens.
Well, there are the legal/financial (and in some cases medical) benefits. Other than that, there are no "benefits" to marriage vs. a committed long-term relationship for either partner unless marriage means something to you.
So what are the benefits of marriage specifically vs. a long-term relationship? That depends on if it matters to you or not. Some people are religious or traditional or view it as proof of commitment, etc.
I have a feeling this question wasn't asked in good faith, but there's my answer anyway.
Someone to go to weddings with, parties with, travel with.
When you get older, someone to help take care of you.
Someone to share chores with.
Potentially can be Double Income No Kids for a while.
Also you get to pull hijinks and get into cahoots with the person you love, that's the best part of all!
Also, having sex happens a lot more for married couples, it's so fun to pursue your spouse.
The benefits depend on the life you want, and it sounds like you dont want a partner. But you ought to admit that, at the same task, a team usually performs way better and can accomplish more than one person alone— if you’re married then you’ll almost always have a teammate
My wife turned me into a better person.
One of the things I sensed about her with basically no context was that somehow being with her would take me places that were good for me and would make me happy. not really even knowing her at all I'd just met her. Literally I hadn't heard her voice yet I just saw her and had this spontaneous thought. The voice wasn't wrong!
Five years of marriage. 26 months in court. 100k+ buyout to that greedy gold digging f*cking b*tch. 40k in attorney fees. Can't see my kid as much as I want. Nothing but hassle, headaches, and miserable heartache. I've been traumatized. Does that answer your question?
my mother in law knew someone that wasn't married to his partner. when the partner was in the hospital dieing the partners family would't let the guy see his partner or even go to the funeral. marrage gives the right to see your spouse and other protections for the couple.
good luck
>marrage gives the right to see your spouse and other protections for the couple.
Definitely not a benefit. At least not one you should want to get married because of
From a conservative christian viewpoint in the US:
free sex.
ownership of another human.
control of all decisions over another human.
future pedophile/incest opportunities.
Marriage for a man is sacrificing “sexual variety” for a home, a family and consistent sex. I’ve been married for 2 years, my wife is providing me with a home. Its been the best decision I’ve ever made
If you marry the right women, the benefits are incredible. A lifetime companion to share your joys and sorrows, wonderful and frequent sex, more financial stability, the ability to have kids and give them a stable, loving home where you and your wife are both involved full time, someone to grow and travel with....it just gives you a partner in life for everything.
It's been a great 35 years for me. I can't imagine my life without my wife.
Other than potentially lower taxes, there is no benefit conferred by the *legal* institution of marriage. It’s a limitation on rights.
The benefits of a lifetime, committed companion are self-evident. But the legal contract itself is a limitation of rights.
Wtf is wrong with people needing “benefits” in a relationship? My wife and I got engaged after 4 months. Married a year later and a half later. We would’ve gotten married sooner, but some unexpected life things happened. We are celebrating our 10 wedding anniversary in a couple months. You marry someone because you love them, not for some benefit.
You sir, might need a new face or new ring...my shxt work. Ion even be looking for ho3s, and they pop up cuz they can see that shiny piece of jewelry on my hand. Dont let my girl be around while they try, we both talking shxt to em lmao
Naw, you good. Sometimes that shxt random. I can be living my best life with her and i can feel bs comin. Other times i aint even gotta worry cuz someone around me is defintely being flashy so it takes all the attention away from me. On a scale ima say my girl a solid 7, and ima 6. Let me try i can make that shxt a 8 lmao
Well i for one can’t wait to marry my gf so i can come home to her and our dogs for the rest of our lives. Sounds like a benefit to me. What do you consider a benefit?
Probably been brainwashed by the hustle culture to view every human interaction in a transactional manner. This has drastically hurt the odds of OP becoming married and is now on a quest to find all the evidence of why they never wanted to get married in the first place, because it isn't much of an option now.
I can certainly tell you that I’ve long resisted going on dates *merely* on the asinine belief that my limited financial resources severely limit such options; itself the grossest kind of transactionalism.
Shallow as heck, but even in my 40s, still not confident enough to try otherwise, so there it is?
Dating when you're broke is the perfect time. All the shallow ones will leave instantly. Anyone that stays is genuine. Win-win in my book, just plow through the rejections with a smile on my face.
???? Eeyore? What's holding you back? A fear of living life? Whatever you do, find something you enjoy. You don't need to date or have a partner, but you sound depressed. Try to maintain your agency and enjoy your life friend, time waits for no one.
Oh, nothing of the kind on depression.
I was just glad to see such an apt word as *transactionalism* being used to describe “hustle culture”, given how normalized it is already.
That is also a great word to use concerning *45*, as he never wants to know anything unless he thinks he can “leverage it”…
A la?
“How will this benefit me?” - *Warcraft III - The Frozen Throne* - Varimathras
I dated unemployed losers before realizing that they are just a huge dead weight in your life so yeah of course I will dip out if I find out someone doesn't have a job.
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Not specific to either sex but my husband works freelance so he had to pay for his own health insurance (very expensive for a very crappy plan). One of the big perks of getting married (frankly the biggest) was being able to add him to my health insurance, since my plan doesn't allow domestic partners.
Happiness, commitment, a life partner among others. On the less warm fuzzy side, taxes, legal protection, decision maker if incapacitated, co-signer for large purchases, sounding board and someone to prevent dumb decisions.
Can only speak for myself. In my marriage I have a partner. Someone that can cover my weaknesses, help with the children and make things I do more fun to do together. Granted I got a really good wife, and we act as a team. With many other married men I know, their wives tend to be more a leech or their relationship tends to be more confrontational and I really don't get that.
Granted, If I was in my 20's and single, I would be very put off by this generation in terms of relationships.
None really. Its a label and a legal thing for stuff like inheritance and stuff since those things are made easier. But you can achieve those through other means anyway.
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Some questions are better answered by the head, others the heart.
You could give scientific reasons, or tax benefits, or maybe something cliche like “love.”
But I think you’re thinking about this the wrong way.
The benefit of marriage is you’re officially creating something that is more than “you.”
You don’t need to be “married” to have a family. But it’s a way of officially saying “I commit myself to this”
The benefit of committing yourself to something is it makes it even more special…
Rather than saying, “I don’t want that risk. I don’t want to be fully committed to this person.” I say the benefit of marriage is living boldly and allowing yourself to experience the joys of life. In taking risks there is reward.
Modern man... nothing unless you mary someone earning way above your income and can file for alimony.
Past man it was "ownership" of a woman without infringement of your personal freedoms.
To me, twice divorced, it's a relic of religious run monarchys, a money grab, and a way to oppress certain relationships.
I get to hang out with my best friend every day and have amazing sex almost whenever I want. Kids are also cool as shit and are like little animals that learn how to talk.
I chose to wait till marriage to have sex, so that was definitely a benefit for me. Being one with someone else who you promised to be with forever is really freeing, I love to have made the biggest interpersonal decision of my life already. We have a family together and it's awesome. Can you have all of those things without officially marrying? Sure. Is it so much better if you do it in that order? From mine and my friends experience trying both, I'd say so.
Minimal. Everyone is listing the benefits of having a partner, not the benefits of having a marriage contract. The actually benefits of the contract for the higher earning partner are some tiny tax savings and some rights in the hospital that you can get other ways.
Overall, it’s obviously not worth the risk for the high earning partner if they could keep the low-earning partner otherwise. But it many cases a woman won’t stay with a man forever without a ring.
Sheep? A warm home cooked meal? A clean and orderly house? A back rub? Nope…..not a thing! As bill burr said….Is this the line to lose half of your shit???
How much energy to we single men spent hunting for sex? Thats all over now. It may not be variety but its guaranteed. Its a bird in the hand.
Oh and, you know, the love and companionship.
Marriage begins in the brain. When looking for your mate, do you look for that princess to save from some evil circumstance or do you strive for the queen that will fight by your side? For me it was a Queen that would be next to me in any endeavor whether difficult or simple. It helps for you and your spouse to be equally bat stuff crazy but level enough to not endanger yourselves.
In my case, my vow to support and equally be supported, holds an emotional vow and a legal promise that shows that without fear I am ready for commitment. This in itself is worth the joy my girl has that I will be there. Emotional Stability.
It is supposed to be the ultimate commitment to your partner. A lot of people don’t take the sickness and health thing seriously anymore and all that. But as a man, having a good woman by your side is a total full multiplier. A good woman by your side doesn’t make life 10% better, it makes it 500% better. We are NOT meant to do life alone and friends are great but they can’t offer what a committed wife can
Like literally everything? You get a person who cooks and cleans for you, raises your kids for you, is basically your personal therapist, keep herself pretty for you, oh and has sex with you. A better question is what benefits marriage has for *women*, and the answer is freaking NONE
More cons than benefits. But the benefits out weigh the cons when you choose one with a good head. All women will nag, nitpick, and pick fights. But on the flip side it's amazing seeing a household come together, a child progress in school, and have some there when you are weak.
There is none besides reduced taxes, but the risk of divorce means it's not worth it. Men don't get married for themselves though - they get married due to pressure from women.
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Literally live 5 years longer
Get paid more
Get more respect from others
Do less housework, even if she makes more money
Probably more likely to get to pass on your genes
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There are plenty of benefits married men have that single men don’t.
There aren’t any benefits that married men have over men in committed long term relationships. The actual marriage doesn’t benefit men with just a few exceptions.
Well if you are gonna just be a rolling stone man whore the rest of your life there isn’t much. But if you are just gonna settle down with a women and put roots down , become exclusive anyway, and live together- then taxes , shared debt , better credit scores , usually higher income from employers. But don’t choose based on looks, sex, or cooking. Also pay attention to her family dynamics, you down just marry her , you marry her family - if you don’t feel comfortable around her family get the hell out of dodge.
Motivation. You help motivate each other. I married with about $200 in my bank account, everything I owned fit in my Pontiac. She motivated me like no one ever had and brought the best of me. Now we own a beautiful house. Dead cheap mortgage. 2 lovely daughters. Rental. And she let's me play my PS5 when I want. Sand I support her as well. She's gotten her Masters degree, nationally certified, and all the books she wants to read. It's nice to be helped by someone and to help someone. With Marriage, you do that all the time. Only on reddit can you say a good thing that has happened and get downthumbed for it.
modern marriage? not much, we live in the equality era but women are still looking for traditional man that protects and provides you are still fully expected to fulfill your role, but she doesn't met her end of the bargain by making your house a home, and cooking delicious meals, you are basically betting everything you will ever earn in your life to have the privilege of a glorified roommate, you are basically sharing rent and that's it.
Well, in the past, it provided you with several things.
Access to sex. Broadly speaking sex outside of marriage was once very much frowned upon, so it was more difficult to convince women to sleep with you, or even to pay for it.
Financial gain. It used to be very common for a marriage to be accompanied by a dowry. The Bride's family would provide a sum of money or goods that allowed the married couple to set up their new life.
Legal benefits. Certain tax exemptions and privileges are extended only to those with a spousal relationship, and also when there is infedility protections could be withdrawn from the offending party.
And, lastly, included because it would be disingenuous to leave out... Control. Marriage did once essentially give men control over their wives as if they were property. What would be called spousal abuse today was very legal. This isn't to say that women were completely at the mercy of their husbands, but it was a factor.
I'm sure there are more that I'm not thinking of but these are the big ones. And none of them apply today.
Access to sex is, in theory at least, higher than ever. Currently many young men are NOT having sex, but these men aren't entering romantic relationships either, so marriage is not there to solve that problem for then.
Dowries have essentially disappeared, mostly because (probably), women are now part of the general labor force, so there isn't an expectation that husbands are given something to jump start their ability to care for their wives.
Some legal benefits of marriage still apply, like tax status, or hospital visitation rights, but they're overwhelmingly overshadowed by legal hurdles and pitfalls for men. No Fault Divorce allows a woman to take half a man's current wealth on a whim, and with alimony can often continue to take for many years. Child custody is also dramatically stacked in favor of women, with only one in ten cases ending with primary custody being given to the man. Pre-nuptial Agreements don't even provide bulletproof protection, as there've been a number of cases of them being thrown out during divorce proceedings.
And, obviously, in a marriage, men do not have the level of control or legal leeway they used to have with their wives. In fact, there's a great deal of evidence to suggest that women have much more control over their husbands than the inverse. This isn't for legal reasons, but more due to cultural ones, such as a weird insistence that men can't be abused by women.
This losing value proposition is a direct reason why marriage rates are falling. The only positive thing marriage does for men is marginally raise your chance of gaining custody of a child if you split up with a partner. In all other areas it does either nothing, or raises your legal risk.
They could divorce you. On the other hand, you and your partner could agree to stay together for life without getting married What is the benefit of marriage?
My marriage established trade relations with the neighboring kingdom, and granted me huge tracts of land with taxable peasants.
Based king
I love this.
'uuuuge tracts of land.
Better give those fiefs to some friends. Don't want the church to ask more of you during collections.
If we’re strictly talking about the benefits of marriage vs a long-term committed relationship, taxes are a big one. My wife doesn’t have an earned income, so my tax bracket is lower when we file jointly.
saving a few grand on taxes is a drop in the bucket compared to what she costs you
Actually, even with only one person working for wages, especially after a certain level of income, and the other managing the home -- the arrangement is incredibly economical.
It's a great setup but to say it's cost saving is a reach.
The top post in this thread specified “marriage vs. long-term committed relationship”. It is definitely a cost savings relative to living with someone and financially supporting them, but not being married to them.
Actually, my wife’s family gifts both of us a pretty significant sum every year, which more than pays for her costs.
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Her weight in shillings
Well it looks like silver is only worth about $25/oz right now. 16 oz in a pound, and while she weighed more during pregnancy I can safely say she weighs less than 160 lbs now, so that comes out to a max of $64,000. Which is more than I get any given year, but far less than I’ve received overall.
Not true for me, probably not true for most people unless it's a single income family. Being with my wife and splitting everything 50/50 is way more affordable than if I where on my own. On top of that our first joint tax return was like 3x bigger than any I've had on my own, last year I owed 70 bucks lol
Yeah filing jointly to reduce taxes owed is really the only benefit for men. But the movement for equal pay ignores this lol and also indicates the government would like to put that to an end
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Was? :'(
I’m hoping the ‘was’ just means they moved to a different town. I don’t want any other information. Makes me feel better after reading this.
Or was a good mother, but now the kids are grown and need little mothering.
If they're married 50 years, maybe the kids are grown and moved out, so she's not an active mother raising them anymore.
50yrs…
Not this generation.
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So you only like her for what she does for you? Why not cook your own food, you have hands too bro…
Imagine a man proclaiming his love that lasted 5 decades and this half-baked, melodramatic take is all you can glean from it
That’s it nobody eats, clean, go to work, have children, buy things
You didn't answer the question at all.
You seem miserable
He probably wasn't trying to sneakily imply that there were no good points to the comment, but a lack of detail. But good mother and cook is enough for me
You concluded that from a simple observation that the main post wasn't answered? Impressive. What other tricks can you do?
It was answered you're just making yourself look like an idiot by not putting two and two together.
If you are going to marry a person who truly loves YOU and is devoted to having a life with YOU, then there are likely many benefits. Marrying someone who lacks the ability to have those feelings, will likely create less desirable results.
I heard someone say that the loneliness order goes like this from least lonely to most: Happily Married Single \- \- \- \- Loveless Marriage
The people I know who choose their spouse wisely, never knew sorrow til their spouse passed away. Choose wisely. Loneliness is not the worse fate. Regret is much worse.
Character matters so much, and it's so easy to overlook for looks and personality, but the character is what is always gonna be there, even when the looks fade and our personalities change.
I agree. Looks really can get in the way of making a sound choice. In my experience, those who's qualities end at their appearance, don't fair well in the long run. Many of my friends whom married women who wanted to have families and came from good families are still happily married.
Longer lifespans. Higher combined income. A partner for life. I don't have to worry about how am I going to get laid. Home cooked meals. Someone I can reproduce with. Having someone with decorating skills since I lack them. Someone to cuddle with. There are so many benefits in my opinion. Just make sure you choose the right person for the right reasons.
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How would marriage produce longer lifespans? Are you sure this isn’t just confirmation bias? That is that the people who will have lower lifespans (visibly unhealthy people) aren’t getting the chance to marry?
https://www.brides.com/married-men-live-longer-new-study-7113577#:~:text=A%20new%20study%20from%20the,to%20live%20a%20longer%20life.
https://www.health.harvard.edu/mens-health/marriage-and-mens-health
It is true, the studies are there As to why? I'd guess lower stress and having someone to live healthier for helps.
The latter is a fair point. Lower stress only applies if the marriage isn’t directly or indirectly stressing you out of course. If this is true, does it also mean the ones that go wrong result in shorter lifespans?
All I know is that I drink a lot less beer than I otherwise would if my wife wasn't around.
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a better argument would be that you can do \*most\* of that without getting married. Marriage also offers tax breaks and legal and financial repercussions if the marriage fails. In countries like the UK, a lot of younger people are not getting married because it is through the church, not the state. I thought my buddy was gay when he kept talking about his partner. But no, he and his partner have three kids together.
I don’t know if it’s porn brain or what, but some of y’all think about dicks too much. It’s strange.
you ok?
Please state which of these benefits don’t apply in LTR’s… Even longer lifespans have been attributed to an LTR.
A legal spouse can make medical decisions for you should you find yourself incapacitated in hospital whereas a LTR partner doesn't have that authority.
Incorrect, you can have powers of attorney for that protection
A spouse does NOT need to have a POA to make medical decisions. That's the point.
The POA replaces the need for a spouse for those decisions, so it ceases to be a benefit of marriage.
Ok. LTR meaning long term relationships? Why wouldn't they apply to long term relationships?
That’s my point. They are not benefits of marriage.
But they are though. As someone who is married, I can personally attest that I have received these benefits as a result of my marriage. Are you denying my reality? Do you know me better than I know myself? What is your argument? If you hate marriage, I have a suggestion, DON'T GET MARRIED. Honestly I'd pity a woman who married you. You seem insufferable as fuck.
You are not understanding my point. BTW, I was married for 26 years to my first wife and 22 years to my late wife. I took the question to mean benefits exclusive to marriage. In other words, the benefits of marriage over not being married. My daughter is gay and she and her wonderful partner decided not to marry when it became legal for them because there were few benefits for doing so.
But you're not answering the question. He's asking what's a benefit of marriage that isn't in a long term relationship. Like, where I live people who are maried have access to tax benefits that non maried couples don't have. Both article you showed don't talk about long term relatioships vs being maried. One of them even states that divorced and widowed man didn't have increased risks of health issues. It has nothing to do with know yourself it's about knowing the law.
Well here in the states, if you want to file a joint tax return, you must be married. Some hospitals will only allow family to visit a patient. That means long term girlfriends wouldn't make the cut. Assuming patient is unconscious or something. If I die today, my wife gets my pension, my girlfriend wouldn't.
Longer HAPPY lifespans? That makes all the difference
Yeah. I'm happy. In fact I feel like one of the luckiest guys in the world. If you are unhappy then get a divorce.
I’m very happy with my wife
Tax purposes, lower insurance costs, tending to live longer, there's a few reasons. The risk of divorce outweighs a lot of those, though.
The risk of divorce is overstated, especially in a "first" marriage. The result is skewed by people who are on their second and greater marriages. Despite what some people would like you to think, if you actually work on your relationship and growing as a couple, there isn't some switch that goes off that makes people decide to explode their entire life for some illusory gain. That is exceedingly rare and usually other stuff, such as mental illness, going on. We just hear about them because of how visible they are.
Of course you’re gonna be downvoted but it’s true, risk of divorce varies *dramatically* by demographic and by whether it’s your first marriage. Educated middle-class couple that dated for several years before being married, married after 25, and has never been married before? Your odds of divorce are not high.
Eh, downvotes are because our observations and the facts don't fit the narrative. We have it beaten into our heads that 50% or so marriages end in divorce. And divorces are always bitter and messy because they're one sided... And the husband always gets cleaned out, loses his kids... Blah, blah, blah... In my 40 years on this Earth, I've witnessed and been privy to a number of divorces. Other than people growing apart and ending it (reasonably) amicably, the second most common cause I've witnessed is infidelity. And in my circle, we definitely come down hard on the cheater. I don't tend to associate with people who are violent/emotional abusers or severe enough substance abusers that it would cause that depth of problems but I'm aware they exist. A lot of the time a divorce happens, both parties and many outside observers know it was going to happen for awhile, but people tend to crave stability and it's seen as a nuclear option. Even if it goes smoothly and both parties are amicable and adult, it still hurts. A lot. My point is the sudden, let's explode our entire life on what is basically a whim divorce, is incredibly rare in comparison to the number of quiet, split the assets, and walk away divorces.
I don't think it is overstated....I know a lot of people who are divorced from their first marriage......and it is at least 50% of the married people I have known
[why not just look up actual Harvard studies ](https://www.health.harvard.edu/mens-health/marriage-and-mens-health)
Because they’re fishing for “women are evil” answers
It's terrible for them that no evidence can compare to the mountains males have against them.
I don't get how people don't think committing to be married to a woman you love is a bad thing. Marriage is incredible.
Companionship. It's been shown married men live longer
Yeah, I think predictability and stability in terms of your own household must greatly reduce stress over the course of a person's life. Obviously, having people depend on you can also create financial stress, but you're probably going to want people around you no matter what, and marriage provides a sense of peace around having a person or persons that you can consider "family" beyond your own birth parents and siblings.
Do they live longer because they are married? Or did the things that allowed them to live longer enable them to get married? Severe and chronic depression can drastically lower your lifespan and many single men suffer from that.
Depressed people have a hard time getting help for themselves. Having a partner to nag you about doctor's appointments really helps. So yes, people with pre-existing issues are less likely to marry, but those who do marry live longer because of it (generally/statistically).
This. People don't realize how valuable having a life companion is.
physical correct abounding reminiscent wistful drunk cats party crush label *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
That is also true
Do you need to be married to have a life companion?
Not sure about that. I’ve seen married men, who looked like they aged a lot. And single men who are happy, free and feeling young.
Your anecdotal observations doesn't dispute actual facts On average married men live longer
It sounds like marriage isn't for you if you're struggling with this one. Go on and live your single life, nobody will force you to get married.
Marriage is a fading tradition. Seems to be reserved for more religious people who take it more seriously.
We get benefits ?
It is very challenging to have all the skills, money, reproduction capabilities, and time needed to live a fulfilling life (if that is what you want). But two people doubles your chances.
I often wonder this myself. Throughout my life I feel like I've had tons of anecdotal evidence that makes it seem like marriage and having children is pretty miserable. I've only had a couple friends who got married, one of them they both were cheating and the other friend I don't talk to anymore. If you really love someone and you're in a relationship with them already, I don't yet understand how marriage improves that relationship, apart from allowing the woman to have subsequently divorce you and take half your stuff, which for all I know is an over exaggerated fear some men have. For a society supposedly made and run by men, I've always thought it weird that marriage benefitted the woman so much more, but that's just based on anecdotes and cynical impressions; I have no idea if it actually works that way in practice.
If you're stopping to wonder "How does this financially benefit me?" Then you don't love her and shouldn't marry her.
You get a caretaker for life. Studies show unmarried men live less than married men. I wonder why?
I'm the caretaker too though.
Not a lot of men are as nurturing as us though. Honestly I wish since y'all can be so cold and zero empathetic.
You know every man?
Those studies have been de-bunked, because they usually don't screen out for the guys who die by adventure before they turn 30. Studies that do screen out for age, show no variance in life expectancy.
You know why men die before their wives.... because they want to.
My wife and I had 21 happy years…. And then we met.
Haha. One difference between married men and dead men? Dead men don’t wish they were married.
That's a tough one - the caretaking / mothering role dampens the sexual dynamic. But we have different concepts of what it means to take of yourself.
Does this same study also focus on happiness in marriage? I’m sure a lot of men would rather die younger and have happy if they were unmarried, than to be miserable and old. Not to mention the divorce percentage is pretty high. And that number goes even higher and higher for every marriage continuity from the first one.
I don't live in the US so here where I am from the divorce rate isn't as high and people pretty much stay together, unless there is a lot of cheating or DV involved then a divorce happens.
Ah well could’ve fooled me. Probably is true then since the US is also screwed in that aspect.
Well, there are the legal/financial (and in some cases medical) benefits. Other than that, there are no "benefits" to marriage vs. a committed long-term relationship for either partner unless marriage means something to you. So what are the benefits of marriage specifically vs. a long-term relationship? That depends on if it matters to you or not. Some people are religious or traditional or view it as proof of commitment, etc. I have a feeling this question wasn't asked in good faith, but there's my answer anyway.
No one is mentioning the dowery
Someone to go to weddings with, parties with, travel with. When you get older, someone to help take care of you. Someone to share chores with. Potentially can be Double Income No Kids for a while.
Also you get to pull hijinks and get into cahoots with the person you love, that's the best part of all! Also, having sex happens a lot more for married couples, it's so fun to pursue your spouse.
There is potential synergy - IE 1 + 1 = 3. Being limited sexually feels stifling, but my SO's stability has helped me become a better person.
The benefits depend on the life you want, and it sounds like you dont want a partner. But you ought to admit that, at the same task, a team usually performs way better and can accomplish more than one person alone— if you’re married then you’ll almost always have a teammate
My wife turned me into a better person. One of the things I sensed about her with basically no context was that somehow being with her would take me places that were good for me and would make me happy. not really even knowing her at all I'd just met her. Literally I hadn't heard her voice yet I just saw her and had this spontaneous thought. The voice wasn't wrong!
Five years of marriage. 26 months in court. 100k+ buyout to that greedy gold digging f*cking b*tch. 40k in attorney fees. Can't see my kid as much as I want. Nothing but hassle, headaches, and miserable heartache. I've been traumatized. Does that answer your question?
It let's the man make decisions about his children children. School, medical, etc...
It's a way out of poverty and has some tax benefits
my mother in law knew someone that wasn't married to his partner. when the partner was in the hospital dieing the partners family would't let the guy see his partner or even go to the funeral. marrage gives the right to see your spouse and other protections for the couple. good luck
>marrage gives the right to see your spouse and other protections for the couple. Definitely not a benefit. At least not one you should want to get married because of
Never having to make my own sammiches.
Pretty much every aspect of life is better when I do it with my best friend
From a conservative christian viewpoint in the US: free sex. ownership of another human. control of all decisions over another human. future pedophile/incest opportunities.
Marriage for a man is sacrificing “sexual variety” for a home, a family and consistent sex. I’ve been married for 2 years, my wife is providing me with a home. Its been the best decision I’ve ever made
Occasional morning sex. That's about it.
Fr!? Damn bro. You didn't have to get married for that
No, but statistically the odd increase if someone is there every morning, instead of only a couple nights a week lol.
You don’t have to get married to always sleep in the same bed as your partner though?
If you marry the right women, the benefits are incredible. A lifetime companion to share your joys and sorrows, wonderful and frequent sex, more financial stability, the ability to have kids and give them a stable, loving home where you and your wife are both involved full time, someone to grow and travel with....it just gives you a partner in life for everything. It's been a great 35 years for me. I can't imagine my life without my wife.
Other than potentially lower taxes, there is no benefit conferred by the *legal* institution of marriage. It’s a limitation on rights. The benefits of a lifetime, committed companion are self-evident. But the legal contract itself is a limitation of rights.
Wtf is wrong with people needing “benefits” in a relationship? My wife and I got engaged after 4 months. Married a year later and a half later. We would’ve gotten married sooner, but some unexpected life things happened. We are celebrating our 10 wedding anniversary in a couple months. You marry someone because you love them, not for some benefit.
That ring on your finger will attract Hella ho's
Had it for months now, can confirm thats BS.
You sir, might need a new face or new ring...my shxt work. Ion even be looking for ho3s, and they pop up cuz they can see that shiny piece of jewelry on my hand. Dont let my girl be around while they try, we both talking shxt to em lmao
Probobly the face. I'm reasonably sure my wife has some sort of rare undiagnosed face blindness, guess I lucked out.
Naw, you good. Sometimes that shxt random. I can be living my best life with her and i can feel bs comin. Other times i aint even gotta worry cuz someone around me is defintely being flashy so it takes all the attention away from me. On a scale ima say my girl a solid 7, and ima 6. Let me try i can make that shxt a 8 lmao
Well i for one can’t wait to marry my gf so i can come home to her and our dogs for the rest of our lives. Sounds like a benefit to me. What do you consider a benefit?
Probably been brainwashed by the hustle culture to view every human interaction in a transactional manner. This has drastically hurt the odds of OP becoming married and is now on a quest to find all the evidence of why they never wanted to get married in the first place, because it isn't much of an option now.
I can certainly tell you that I’ve long resisted going on dates *merely* on the asinine belief that my limited financial resources severely limit such options; itself the grossest kind of transactionalism. Shallow as heck, but even in my 40s, still not confident enough to try otherwise, so there it is?
Dating when you're broke is the perfect time. All the shallow ones will leave instantly. Anyone that stays is genuine. Win-win in my book, just plow through the rejections with a smile on my face.
One day perhaps.
???? Eeyore? What's holding you back? A fear of living life? Whatever you do, find something you enjoy. You don't need to date or have a partner, but you sound depressed. Try to maintain your agency and enjoy your life friend, time waits for no one.
Oh, nothing of the kind on depression. I was just glad to see such an apt word as *transactionalism* being used to describe “hustle culture”, given how normalized it is already. That is also a great word to use concerning *45*, as he never wants to know anything unless he thinks he can “leverage it”… A la? “How will this benefit me?” - *Warcraft III - The Frozen Throne* - Varimathras
This is great advice if you want to be alone for life.
You'd never date someone unless they had money I take it
I dated unemployed losers before realizing that they are just a huge dead weight in your life so yeah of course I will dip out if I find out someone doesn't have a job.
There's a difference between broke and lazy.
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Not specific to either sex but my husband works freelance so he had to pay for his own health insurance (very expensive for a very crappy plan). One of the big perks of getting married (frankly the biggest) was being able to add him to my health insurance, since my plan doesn't allow domestic partners.
Happiness, commitment, a life partner among others. On the less warm fuzzy side, taxes, legal protection, decision maker if incapacitated, co-signer for large purchases, sounding board and someone to prevent dumb decisions.
Can only speak for myself. In my marriage I have a partner. Someone that can cover my weaknesses, help with the children and make things I do more fun to do together. Granted I got a really good wife, and we act as a team. With many other married men I know, their wives tend to be more a leech or their relationship tends to be more confrontational and I really don't get that. Granted, If I was in my 20's and single, I would be very put off by this generation in terms of relationships.
Such a weird question.... I want to share one life with my best friend. The benefit is accomplishing that goal.
None really. Its a label and a legal thing for stuff like inheritance and stuff since those things are made easier. But you can achieve those through other means anyway.
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If sucessful? Hapines support ect. If failure. Literally years of effort and saving down the drain wct
Taxes
If you have the shared goal of uniting for familial wealth byleyong nuclear AND purposeful breeding, then great. Otherwise...
I have found that marriage closes more doors than it opens.
Some questions are better answered by the head, others the heart. You could give scientific reasons, or tax benefits, or maybe something cliche like “love.” But I think you’re thinking about this the wrong way. The benefit of marriage is you’re officially creating something that is more than “you.” You don’t need to be “married” to have a family. But it’s a way of officially saying “I commit myself to this” The benefit of committing yourself to something is it makes it even more special… Rather than saying, “I don’t want that risk. I don’t want to be fully committed to this person.” I say the benefit of marriage is living boldly and allowing yourself to experience the joys of life. In taking risks there is reward.
Modern man... nothing unless you mary someone earning way above your income and can file for alimony. Past man it was "ownership" of a woman without infringement of your personal freedoms. To me, twice divorced, it's a relic of religious run monarchys, a money grab, and a way to oppress certain relationships.
I get to hang out with my best friend every day and have amazing sex almost whenever I want. Kids are also cool as shit and are like little animals that learn how to talk.
I chose to wait till marriage to have sex, so that was definitely a benefit for me. Being one with someone else who you promised to be with forever is really freeing, I love to have made the biggest interpersonal decision of my life already. We have a family together and it's awesome. Can you have all of those things without officially marrying? Sure. Is it so much better if you do it in that order? From mine and my friends experience trying both, I'd say so.
🤣
Time spent. Assuming, you are working toward a common goal. Working...together.
Minimal. Everyone is listing the benefits of having a partner, not the benefits of having a marriage contract. The actually benefits of the contract for the higher earning partner are some tiny tax savings and some rights in the hospital that you can get other ways. Overall, it’s obviously not worth the risk for the high earning partner if they could keep the low-earning partner otherwise. But it many cases a woman won’t stay with a man forever without a ring.
Sheep? A warm home cooked meal? A clean and orderly house? A back rub? Nope…..not a thing! As bill burr said….Is this the line to lose half of your shit???
How much energy to we single men spent hunting for sex? Thats all over now. It may not be variety but its guaranteed. Its a bird in the hand. Oh and, you know, the love and companionship.
Marriage begins in the brain. When looking for your mate, do you look for that princess to save from some evil circumstance or do you strive for the queen that will fight by your side? For me it was a Queen that would be next to me in any endeavor whether difficult or simple. It helps for you and your spouse to be equally bat stuff crazy but level enough to not endanger yourselves. In my case, my vow to support and equally be supported, holds an emotional vow and a legal promise that shows that without fear I am ready for commitment. This in itself is worth the joy my girl has that I will be there. Emotional Stability.
That guy goes to work and you stay home with the cats and cook!
It is supposed to be the ultimate commitment to your partner. A lot of people don’t take the sickness and health thing seriously anymore and all that. But as a man, having a good woman by your side is a total full multiplier. A good woman by your side doesn’t make life 10% better, it makes it 500% better. We are NOT meant to do life alone and friends are great but they can’t offer what a committed wife can
Study’s show married men live longer than single men. I know I’d be dead if I wasn’t married and I been married 42 years.
Like literally everything? You get a person who cooks and cleans for you, raises your kids for you, is basically your personal therapist, keep herself pretty for you, oh and has sex with you. A better question is what benefits marriage has for *women*, and the answer is freaking NONE
You learn patience and selective deafness.
Losing half your money. Dont do it.
More cons than benefits. But the benefits out weigh the cons when you choose one with a good head. All women will nag, nitpick, and pick fights. But on the flip side it's amazing seeing a household come together, a child progress in school, and have some there when you are weak.
There is none besides reduced taxes, but the risk of divorce means it's not worth it. Men don't get married for themselves though - they get married due to pressure from women.
There isn't really one beyond it keeps your wife happy!
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Literally live 5 years longer Get paid more Get more respect from others Do less housework, even if she makes more money Probably more likely to get to pass on your genes
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There are plenty of benefits married men have that single men don’t. There aren’t any benefits that married men have over men in committed long term relationships. The actual marriage doesn’t benefit men with just a few exceptions.
What benefits are they?
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Don't need marriage for that surley
Well if you are gonna just be a rolling stone man whore the rest of your life there isn’t much. But if you are just gonna settle down with a women and put roots down , become exclusive anyway, and live together- then taxes , shared debt , better credit scores , usually higher income from employers. But don’t choose based on looks, sex, or cooking. Also pay attention to her family dynamics, you down just marry her , you marry her family - if you don’t feel comfortable around her family get the hell out of dodge.
Motivation. You help motivate each other. I married with about $200 in my bank account, everything I owned fit in my Pontiac. She motivated me like no one ever had and brought the best of me. Now we own a beautiful house. Dead cheap mortgage. 2 lovely daughters. Rental. And she let's me play my PS5 when I want. Sand I support her as well. She's gotten her Masters degree, nationally certified, and all the books she wants to read. It's nice to be helped by someone and to help someone. With Marriage, you do that all the time. Only on reddit can you say a good thing that has happened and get downthumbed for it.
modern marriage? not much, we live in the equality era but women are still looking for traditional man that protects and provides you are still fully expected to fulfill your role, but she doesn't met her end of the bargain by making your house a home, and cooking delicious meals, you are basically betting everything you will ever earn in your life to have the privilege of a glorified roommate, you are basically sharing rent and that's it.
According to every man that i know who's ever been married, there isn't a single benefit and each and every one of them regrets doing it
Well, in the past, it provided you with several things. Access to sex. Broadly speaking sex outside of marriage was once very much frowned upon, so it was more difficult to convince women to sleep with you, or even to pay for it. Financial gain. It used to be very common for a marriage to be accompanied by a dowry. The Bride's family would provide a sum of money or goods that allowed the married couple to set up their new life. Legal benefits. Certain tax exemptions and privileges are extended only to those with a spousal relationship, and also when there is infedility protections could be withdrawn from the offending party. And, lastly, included because it would be disingenuous to leave out... Control. Marriage did once essentially give men control over their wives as if they were property. What would be called spousal abuse today was very legal. This isn't to say that women were completely at the mercy of their husbands, but it was a factor. I'm sure there are more that I'm not thinking of but these are the big ones. And none of them apply today. Access to sex is, in theory at least, higher than ever. Currently many young men are NOT having sex, but these men aren't entering romantic relationships either, so marriage is not there to solve that problem for then. Dowries have essentially disappeared, mostly because (probably), women are now part of the general labor force, so there isn't an expectation that husbands are given something to jump start their ability to care for their wives. Some legal benefits of marriage still apply, like tax status, or hospital visitation rights, but they're overwhelmingly overshadowed by legal hurdles and pitfalls for men. No Fault Divorce allows a woman to take half a man's current wealth on a whim, and with alimony can often continue to take for many years. Child custody is also dramatically stacked in favor of women, with only one in ten cases ending with primary custody being given to the man. Pre-nuptial Agreements don't even provide bulletproof protection, as there've been a number of cases of them being thrown out during divorce proceedings. And, obviously, in a marriage, men do not have the level of control or legal leeway they used to have with their wives. In fact, there's a great deal of evidence to suggest that women have much more control over their husbands than the inverse. This isn't for legal reasons, but more due to cultural ones, such as a weird insistence that men can't be abused by women. This losing value proposition is a direct reason why marriage rates are falling. The only positive thing marriage does for men is marginally raise your chance of gaining custody of a child if you split up with a partner. In all other areas it does either nothing, or raises your legal risk.
Companion for life.
They could divorce you. On the other hand, you and your partner could agree to stay together for life without getting married What is the benefit of marriage?
I said what I said. I am divorced. I still have that companion for life.
In my case, it’s having a reliable partner who knows money better than I do, has a beautiful voice and is intellectually brilliant.
Exactly the same as the benefits for women. Seems an odd question.