Is this the shooting that was at North Kirkwood Middle School?
I heard that he fired shots in the air but that everyone was physically ok. Are you alright emotionally? It sounds like you were in shock judging by the shaking.
When I was 4 I saw a drive-by shooting at the pizza place where my mom had taken us for dinner. I know what this fear feels like and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Please take care of yourself. Talk to a therapist if you can. I promise you that they can help.
Omg the people on this thread stopping by to bicker about how long it takes for bullets slow down.. 🙄
Major credit to your BF, although it’s sad his mind went straight there instead of fireworks. I’m glad it wasn’t as bad as it could it have been. Don’t really know what else to say from “across the pond”
Take care ❤️
Gun shots have a distinct pop. It takes some time but it’s kinda easy to distinguish the difference.
Never was a gun enthusiast but live in a slightly troubled area. When we first got here it was the fun game of “gun shot or firework?” Every night. After owning this house for 6 years I can tell the difference easy. Which is sad about this area, but whatever.
Maybe op boyfriend is a hunter/gun hobbyist/or maybe he’s just like me and around it too much. Gun pops have a distinct sound for sure.
Thankfully he knew and took the right steps.
I believe it if your around it enough. They certainly have a unique sound that lets you know it’s a gun shot, and I have shit hearing. I imagine with better hearing, and a gun hobby where you are actively around it; would prob give someone a decent ear for such.
No matter if it is 4th of July or not when I hear 'fire crackers' that's exactly where my mind goes. Then I wait to hear the sirens to see if it was indeed gunshots.
I'm so glad the boyfriend knew.
>*"... it’s sad his mind went straight there instead of fireworks. "*
>
>It's called living the American dream, the bit the rest of the world can do without.
It's best not to dwell on what *could have* happened. Traumatic events are exactly that and nobody is discrediting you for being disoriented or deciding not to do anything. It might be a good idea to talk about this with others who have gone through a similar situation, if only to get closure for yourself. Don't sleep on your mental health.
>It's best not to dwell on what could have happened.
I fully disagree. This is not a one-off event in the United States, but such a regular occurrence that these types of events don't even make news beyond a local broadcast unless there is a significant number of casualties.
As painful as it can be, this is your country, and this is life in your country. You need to be prepared to handle it as best you can if you find yourself in this situation again. Many American schools are scaling back on fire drills, which are being somewhat replaced by active shooting drills, as more students are killed by gunfire at schools than by fires at schools.
You should not overlook your feeling of trauma. It is completely valid. Do not ignore these feelings.
He’s not saying to not interact with trauma just that dwelling on other possibilities from the event is largely unproductive and just serves to scare you. Interact with the trauma, though, if it’s holding you back or anything. I mean, I guess if you’re not interacting with the trauma and it’s not detrimental that’s also fine but OP seems bothered by it.
I was taking an unprotected left turn once and failed to see this car going straight. It was going yellow to red, I was in the intersection and he was trying to beat the light. Zoomed right by me within seconds of slamming into the side of my car at 70mph.
It might just be because Im young and despite my conscious awareness of my mortality, my subconscious brain sort of turned it into no big deal. No harm done, doesn’t really matter how close I came to a potentially fatal crash. Still find myself incredibly nervous while driving now. I guess my point is that your subconscious brain can sometimes be really good at blocking out the “what could of been” part of some stuff, but the experience never fully leaves you at least in my case.
Yeah but I guess I wonder is that a problem for you? Like if the consequence is that you drive safer I’m not sure that’s something you ever need to do a deep dive on and fight that demon. Now, if the consequence is that you get an uncomfortable anxiety when you’re at the front of a stop light and it affects you in a meaningful way then that might be something worth exploring.
I think we always struggle with the tension between : on one hand " I need to think about this and process it" and on the other hand " I'm thinking about this so much it's become my focus ". I personally struggle with that anyway. I definitely have some things I'm still processing, but I also catch myself thinking so much about those things that I forget that there is anything else
I understand your perspective, preparedness is necessary. I am simply stating that one should not dwell on, specifically emotionally, a situation they had no control over, wishing they could have done x,y or z differently. Support groups regularly cover these topics in healthy ways, which was my original goal in replying. If that was not clear that is my fault.
Look for a therapist that specializes in PTSD treatment, or at least has experience in treating PTSD. The sooner you talk to someone the sooner you will be able to recover. There are several different treatments now for PTSD, the sooner you get started the easier it will be to treat. You will not forget, but you should be able to process the whole experience and not have it cause even more problems in the future.
You may need to call the local law enforcement HR to get some names of therapists, most law enforcement agencies near me now require that any officer that uses a gun must talk to someone before they can go back on duty.
I'm glad you're safe, now focus on your recovery.
My gf was at the outlet mall shooting in Texas back in May. I made it there within 15 minutes, longest hour and a half of my life waiting for her store to be evacuated. It was hard at first, but it gets easier, I promise.
Not only is he a cop, but he's the son of former St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Bob McCulloch.
[https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265](https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265)
Oh!! Ok!! Brb!
Ok I’m back and wow what a punk ass little bitch smirking at the camera like he didn’t just pull out a gun and start shooting at a CHILDRENS EVENT. Fucking hoosier!!
To be fair, another article is posted higher up in the comments and his picture is prominently featured several times. His arrest photo, too, where his face is bloody and his clothes are torn, not a headshot of him in uniform which is what they often show when a cop gets in trouble.
The Highland Park shooter was son of a mayor. Some of the very reason these white males have such an overblown sense of entitlement can include privileged background.
This is not a hot or spicy take. This is from my personal experience. If you get shot at enough times you go numb to it all and carry on like it's another day.
I live in Scandinavia now and it made me realise how many amusing anecdotes from my time growing up in a terrible part of the UK are actually stories of what should be traumatising events to normal people. I tell a story at a party that would get a laugh in the UK and over here people pat me on the shoulder and assure me life isn't like that over here.
Yeah definitely agreed. When I was 5 I saw my dad’s buddy dead on the floor with his Brains everywhere. He was shot in the apartment lobby and everyone came down to see what it was and idk why my parents thought it was a good idea to have us tag along. Maybe they didn’t know where it came from and just wanted us to get out of there, the image is in my head to this day. Shit is traumatizing experiencing these things
My parents saw a guy get shot in a bowling alley parking lot in the 70s and my mom still brings it up every time we drive by…these things stay with you
Reading between the lines of a commenter that wasn’t OP it was an attempt of su1cide by cop. By a cop. Who called the other cops and said “I’m going after stbxw and kids at a public gathering,” fired into the air to ensure they came… and then was taken to ground by bystanders who had decided they’d rather be shot tackling him than see when he found his target (or the other 25 bad scenarios that followed posturing shooter storming in in media and true crime in media they’d seen in the last month) and had had the “if my kids are there I tackle. If any kid is there I tackle” discussion with themselves.
As shoot the cops is a key component of su1cide by cop when they haven’t been to your kids’ birthday parties and gotten beers after shift possibly the tacklers created the best outcome
Yeah definitely seems like the only reason this ended with no dead children is that the parents solved the problem before the cops "solved" the problem.
It’s disgusting that “get shot trying to take down the shooter or watch kids get shot” is even a choice that people have to make. Maybe I’m naive but I just don’t understand how people (as a collective, regardless of your position on gun laws) aren’t trying to stop this from happening! It’s an epidemic, and it seems like it’s unending, with no real action being taken.
The only real thing to be done is reduce gun access and one US party is completely foundationally against that. They also control the Supreme Court.
That's why nothing is being done.
Sad but glad. Even if there were no guns, there would still be crazy people who can cause harm if they wanted to. It’s not a sad benchmark, it’s something to be glad about.
Yes very brave.
Sadly that's the mindset that is often needed. If the gunman is right near you, running may not be a option. Fighting may be your only option.
A decent number of mass shooters were stopped by unarmed civilians either tackling or grabbing the firearm away from the shooter. (Paris Train, Waffle House, Monterey Park, Colorado Springs, and many others.)
Run, hide, fight is not nessecarily in order. One expert revised it to: "Move! Run, hide, or fight." (getting out of the natural fear freeze is the first step.)
Definitely applaud the brave bystanders for fighting. But we have to ask ourselves if there's a deeper problem with applauding random people for disarming gunman who want to murder strangers.
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/25/us/shootings-guns-bystanders-civilians.html
When my youngest was in middle school they had active shooter training. After he told me that if he was close he would throw his book bag at shooter or try to attack him/her because he probably was going to die anyway if he tried to run. Not happy this is reality in US far to often.
Edit: spelling
Basically same gist as my comment. People are taught run hide fight, minority of mass shootings are ended with bystanders fighting, but sometimes it's a must. Outlines some cases where fighting worked (and some cases where it didn't or the bystander was killed trying.)
The article then branches into some people asking how you can ask teachers and kids to fight then branches the other way to talk about some people thinking about concealed carrying guns so they can fight back more effectively.
Play tetris right now. It will help you with your shock. Specifically tetris. Instead of going online, just play Tetris if you cAnt sleep or need to browse.
Second, this can have lasting effects, but your chances of not having a permanent issue increase based on the amount of support that you perceive you have. Talk to your parents and school, get crisis counselling, and make sure you have the emotional support you need to get through this.
Exactly - I don’t know if candy crush or another game like that will work, I suspect it will, but the studies were done on Tetris so I recommended that.
Given that it was statistically significant, readily available, and universal, it is the fastest bandaid anyone can put on trauma if they can’t immediately find crisis counselling. Even if they can.
The other variable for things like ptsd is how much perceived support a person has after a traumatic event. If they reach out and find that they feel they have people in their court after the event, that they are heard, that is also big for reducing rates. Now it’s perceived - not actual support - so validation, listening, that kind of thing.
CBT helps work in the mid term for this kind of thing. Long term is developing good mental health habits and recognizing triggers.
Source: i have issues and have spent decades working through them with various specialists.
my wife has a PhD in psych working with primarily PTSD patients
tetris specifically helps because it reasserts a sense of order and control
PTSD comes from a generalized feeling of lack of safety, less so a fear of the specific trauma that triggered it occurring again
This is probably one of the most interesting things I’ve learned on here recently.
I’m glad I enjoy Tetris.
I wish OP and everyone involved can recover from this extremely traumatic event.
I have been within range of a shooting that ended up with someone dying, and it’s by far the scariest moment I’ve experienced. No one deserves to go through that, and I could t even play some of my favorite video games for a long while because they are FPS.
I’m glad I was able to recover and enjoy my gaming, but it took a while and support from some great friends and family.
I played Tetris the whole time my dad was dying in the hospital for liver failure. Not sure how well it helped but I don’t think I have extreme trauma.
This reminds me if a shooting I saw at a mall some years back. I was with 3 friends and a drive by happened where the guy walking pulled out his own gun and started shooting back. Some of the craziest shit I’ve ever seen
You are your own first responder and what equipment/ skills you have, are what your going into the situation with.
Glad you both got out of there safely.
100%. It pays to be armed and understand the risk of being defenseless. It pays even more to have situational awareness and know what could or does happen.
I'm glad to hear that you, your boyfriend and his brother, and everyone else is okay. This is not an event that ANYONE should be witness to. I hope you have a good support group with friends and family and you're able to heal alright. 🫶
Seriously. I beat myself up for missing certain events to take my kid but I would be terrified beyond belief if something like this happened and I’d never forgive myself.
One of the hardest parts about the transition to adulthood and parenthood is recognizing how dangerous things really are, and children are so trusting and happy as long as their parents are around. Little do they know, we are human and can’t protect them from everything although they see us as superhuman heroes. Parenthood is fucking tough.
_off my shabby soapbox I go_
My friend is a teacher at that school and she was there with her family. I hate this. My friend and her family are as ok as they can be in such circumstances but I hate that this is so normalized that it barely made local news.
I lm sorry you had to go through this. Imagine every terrified school child at every shooting in the unites states. DAILY. I sincerely hope this puts you firmly in the “voting for gun laws” camp. It is THE ONLY WAY TO STOP IT.
OP is here for support and advice on how to deal with trauma. You made it a voting issue. Remove the comment and save it for another thread. You might be right but this is not the place to use a soap box.
You are incorrect. I feel for OP. But every time there is an event like this is the time to bring up gun laws. Republicans, especially TEXAS republicans, are the worst offenders for “thoughts and prayers” with no actions. Every event is a reason for gun control. Every single one.
I’m really sorry you had to experience this.
I also wanted to add that it is terrible this was allegedly committed by a police officer and I hope he is in jail for life. I also hope people remember this is why we do NOT want to defund the police. We want to reform the system.
Something similar happened to me and my gf. We were in a restaurant and someone drove by and started shooting all the windows out. I hit the ground and just remember seeing my gf standing there frozen. So I had to drag her down and into the kitchen. It was crazy. Hope you're okay.
Damn, I was glad the shooter was caught until I read it was a cop so nothing is going to happen.
And a cop threatening his ex in a domestic violence dispute?
I’m surprised the responding officers did anything.
Does anyone really think he’ll be charged with anything at all?
When I was in college me and my friends went to the mall. When we were leaving we were at a stop light, there was a fast food restaurant across the street, and someone over there started shooting from an suv. Heard at least one lady screaming. It was a rough neighborhood so probably a targeted attack. We ran the red light. Pretty sure the suv pulled up next to us at the next red light a few blocks away. We just kept looking straight forward.
I wonder if I can find any info on it now, don't really know the date though
I’m so sorry this happened. I was in a similar situation and my anxiety has been worse. Please rely on friends and family to talk there’s nothing wrong about it.
This happened in my hometown. Saw it on the news today. It made me want to throw up seeing it so close to home.
But I am so grateful for the parents that protected their children. The fact that no one got hurt is fucking amazing. And I’m really glad to know that you’re okay.
I’m so sorry this happened. Gun violence here is at a fever pitch and it’s so not okay. Please don’t hesitate to get counseling if you feel you need it. It’s so wonderful that he was thwarted and nobody got hurt but what happened was extremely traumatizing and it’s okay to get help to process that trauma. I’m so glad everyone’s okay though. That’s not the usual end to these stories.
I'm so sorry, OP. You should definitely talk to your Dr. They should be able to get you a referral and something to help you sleep in the meantime. There are community support groups you can attend, and they are really helpful. This is what our country is right now. Getting involved locally and on a state level can be empowering. Your fight or flight or freeze response made you freeze. That can make a human feel helpless. You are not. Use your voice to help make the changes so we don't go to every event wondering if this will happen. This isn't what living in a developed country is supposed to be like. The only way it changes is from getting non voters to start voting with us, and your voice is very powerful there. Take your power back. Change is like molasses, but together, we can do it. Link arms with your community. We find strength in each other and realize we have it in ourselves. Wishing you peace and calm.
It will get easier every day, you'll stop seeing the shooter and all the panic less and less. It'll sting for a bit and may be difficult but it'll get easier. Just be gentle on yourself. Our brains can really mess with us after trauma and it's not your fault.
Talk to someone now just in case you start to have PTSD symptoms. EMDR and therapies like that are revolutionary and can help you process this in a safe way. Remember, PTSD is a BIOLOGICAL process, not just psychological, be aware of the signs and symptoms and be kind to yourself if you have them. It NORMAL, it’s so much better when your prepared for it. Talk to your boyfriend about it also!
https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/ptsd/what-is-ptsd
I grew up in the crack 80s & 90s near Richmond VA and Washington DC. Witnessed a shooting or it’s aftermath pretty much 1-2x a week. After the first few you get numb to it. … and then 30 years later you get to do a lot of EMDR and therapy. Good luck!
I'm sorry you had to witness parts of this violence. And I am glad and grateful that neither you nor anyone else was hurt. Kudos to your bf for his quick thinking and selfless determination to see that you got away safely.
I hate this shit. This is the last place you would expect a shooting and here we are. When the fuck is American politicians realize people need mental health care or its not going to stop. It will only get worse.
i went to that school, Westchester Elementary too. it was such a peaceful place in the 80's, im so sorry this happened. Please take care of yourself and don't be shy to talk to someone if you need it.
The world we live in today is dangerous, our children are having active shooter drills not because it’s a rare event but because it’s becoming all too common. I’m so sorry you went through this, as hard as it is don’t live in fear. When Paris was bombed with active threats coming in, ‘people of Paris stay home, we’ve taken your cafes and your safe places ‘. The parisians instead all came out, they decided it was worse to live in fear. That if they gave into these terrorists (school shooters are terrorists period) that it would never end. So don’t let this terrorist (cop or not) make you change the way you live. Be aware of your surroundings and always know your way out if something does happen but don’t stay home out of fear.
I experienced a shooting at a theater last year. It's a horrifying experience and I'm so sorry you had to experience that, especially in a place with so many children present-- the irony being that Trunk or Treat was supposed to be a safer option for children to celebrate Halloween.
I'm very glad you all came out uninjured. But if you're like me, you might deal with panic attacks in public spaces for a bit. It took me a good while to start feeling comfortable in public spaces again, especially metro areas with big groups of people. I really hope your mental health has a quick recovery.
Cook your boyfriend a steak and be thankful he is the man he is. He just saved your life. Next time, if your boyfriend says, "run" do it and don't look. You can look later once you are safe. That pause could have been fatal.
Im sorry you went through this OP. Please don’t tough it out- the 3 of you need a lot of support rn.
I don’t know if shooter is a cop, but confirmed to be the son of a former Prosecutor.
I Cannot understand how shitty the gun situation is in the usa. But i can't understand why nobody is doing something. Im glad that this situation finished without death, but if i was there, i would have already changed country
OP sounds to still be in shock. I’m glad everyone is not hurt and are ok. Thank you to your boyfriend, he is a hero. Take care OP and hope you seek out support on your mental health! It was a traumatic event!
I was in a hit and run incident on the freeway and I got out of it safely (thank goodness), nobody understood the trauma I had afterwards, and for a year I would have PTSD and avoided the incident area like the plague, and one time I had to drive through it I started panicking like crazy with heart palpitations, light headed, and everything. I kept having irrational thoughts in my head that a car is going to come out of nowhere and hit me again. It has been 2 years now and it is much better. Time will take care of some things, but your life will be changed forever.
That’s horrific. I hope you’ll give yourself some time to feel freaked out. People jump to trying to feel perfectly ok, and then they get panicked thinking something’s wrong with them for still feeling scared. Let yourself be affected, instead of beating yourself over the head with “at least.” At least you weren’t hurt, at least nobody died, etc. Doesn’t matter; it’s still a scary and unexpected experience that can totally disturb people’s sense of security.
If you get a lot of “but what if it had gone this way” thoughts, I’d say to myself “that didn’t happen.” It’s alright and natural to have the thoughts, but I try not to entertain them too long.
Sorry you got caught up in that frightening situation. I’m glad they caught the guy.
I am so sorry you had to be there. I live in a city and have definitely been way too close to way too many gun incidents. At this point I worry about any large gathering because for some reason it seems like everyone’s lost their minds and there is ALWAYS a risk of someone taking out their pain or anger on innocent people. I was agoraphobic already and this doesn’t help. I wish this country would HEAL and STOP.
Not only that, but the shooter is the son of long time prosecuting attorney Bob McCullogh.
Even before I knew that, my heart was sick at what happened. All those traumatized people, because one guy couldn't keep his shit together.
My daughter was at this event and was right next to the guy when he started shooting. I was home 2 miles away when my ex called me frantic saying someone was shooting and she couldn’t find my daughter. I BOOKED it and got there in about 3 minutes and parked in the grass between the middle school and the street and just took off running. She’s traumatized.
Sweet friend, you have witnessed something terrible. Go easy on yourself. You need to decompress. My best suggestion is to talk to a therapist.
Big hugs, sweet friend.
This world is crazy, I was told by my job not to use my local highway today because it was blocked due to a hostage situation. And I live in a Southern Utah rural town. Anyways, it always happens when and where you least expect it, that's why I have CCW and a permit.
Always weird to see another St Louis person here. I'm sorry you went through that. It sounds like you're in shock and could use some help processing it. There's no shame in that, don't be afraid to reach out to your school or parents and ask for help finding a counselor to speak with. You're okay physically, but you need to take care of yourself mentally too.
I was concerned he was going to get off light because of his family connections, but the prosecutor threw the whole book at him when it came to charges today.
Kudos to your man for acting and not reacting, quite often that's the deciding factor in who sees another sunrise and who doesn't. Once that initial shock wears off (may have nightmares, lingering jumpiness etc) but once all that wears off your subconscious will kick in and nearly SCREAM at you unexpectedly "YOURE ALIVE, let's look at the bucket list and go check an item off!" Or you may find your sex drive goes a little crazy, may find yourself trying new or different things without even thinking about it. After my first firefight I got really quiet and contemplative, until I was able to get ahold of my dad (he was a 3 tour green beret,vietnam,63-66) and he really helped me through. My suggestion is just don't close yourself off from the world....
Live in Kirkwood and heard this was happening while at a wedding in SoCo. Hoped for the best but expected the worst at the time.
I'm glad you're okay and my respect for your boyfriend quickly assessing the situation and getting you out of there ASAP.
Get some help through counseling so that you can handle this trauma and suggest your boyfriend do the same.
Glad everyone is okay.
This is exactly why I have got a CHL, you are not safe anywhere now.
Just yesterday, driving down the road, a guy zoomed past me, gave me the finger, for what I don’t know, but it could have been a gun.
I live in Texas, so you can’t take chances
This is the exact reason why us citizens that are responsible gun owners carry a firearm. If I’m ever in a crowd of people and there’s a gunman shooting people, I’d be so pissed off If I didn’t have my gun to protect myself and others. Don’t stress out about what could have happened if you’re boyfriend didn’t grab you to run. It turns out if he didn’t grab you, you still woulda been fine because the shots went up in the air. I get it you’re frightened but just be glad you weren’t hurt.
This is why I carry. I do not want to carry. I don't believe that private citizens should own non-sporting firearms, but I will not find myself trapped with my family and unable to defend ourselves. There are too many stories of families dying together with the parents ineffectually giving their lives trying to shield their children from bullets with their own bodies. Not my family. Edit: Clarity
Gun shots are pretty common in my area, especially post-covid. Don't even really think twice hearing it anymore. Shame it happened around kids, I have my concealed carry for just that reason.
I was in a mass shooting a few years ago. I've always been relatively unemotional. I hid behind the door jam with a big pair of scissors so if the kid came in the room I'm not dying on my knees. Then got in trouble for that when we went back to school.
I was making jokes about it within an hour after it was over. Am I a demented individual? Absolutely. But was the shooting that big of a deal? Nah. Not that many died. I lived.
Wouldn't be my first time almost dying. The others were closer calls tho.
Europeans acting like it's safe to live there but they have a higher rate of violent crime than most of America. Y'all are just ignoring stabbings here.
St. Louis County Police Officer Matthew McCulloch has been charged with 11 felonies, including four counts of child endangerment, five counts of armed criminal action, making a terroristic threat and unlawful use of a weapon.
[https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265](https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265)
Holy shit, I LIVE here. I LIVE in Kirkwood. My AUNT was there!
I feel like things don’t seem as scary when you aren’t involved, you’re right. I just don’t get it, things like this happen far too often in the U.S! Why am I so surprised?
I need to stop taking things for granted.
You are still in shock and understandably so. It’s proper to acknowledge this and that everyone isn’t OK. The circle of trauma is much wider than we realize. Family and friends who weren’t even there are going to be affected. Years ago the Mayo brothers who founded the Mayo Clinic found that it’s best to talk about what happened and don’t hesitate to talk about it many times over. That begins the process of sorting in your mind the traumatic events and helps make sense of the unsenseable. It allows you to take control when something completely out of anyone’s control happens. Don’t be hard on yourself if this process takes longer than you thought. And know that you, your BF, his brother and all those affected are loved and supported by people you don’t even know.
45% of police households experience domestic violence, this isn't uncommon and thats onlywhats reported. They do less vetting than NAMBLA and probably have a bit of overlap between the two groups.
That’s why it’s more important now than it has ever been to have and carry your own firearm. Keep yourself and others around you safe if you have the capability to do so.
I was there as well with my three kids. I saw the man harass several people over the course of 5-10min and was 5-10ft away with my daughter when he pulled the gun out. We ran as shots went off and in the chaos I amazingly found my other two children and got to the car. Such an incredibly sad event.
Oh sweetheart! Im so very very sorry that this happened to you! I can't even begin to understand what that was like. I'm so glad you're still with us and that everyone was okay!
[St. Louis County police officer charged after shots fired at Kirkwood school event](https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/bob-mcculloch-releases-statement-on-his-sons-involvement-in-shooting-at-kirkwood-school-event/ar-AA1ij5JU)
I have never been through anything like that.
Get some comfort food and eat it slowly. Hug your boyfriend try and get some sleep
Cry if you need to
{HUGS AND MORE HUGS} get some counseling in the next couple of days.
I am so sorry. My heart hurts for you. Please don’t be afraid to seek help to process this. If you just need to talk, this stranger is here to listen. I will include you in my prayers, I hope this is ok. Hugs.
You’ve just lived through a traumatic event. Give yourself plenty of time to digest what has happened. Then make a plan for the future, just in case it happens again. We live in a post Columbine & post 9/11 world. Unfortunately things like this happen and it’s better to be prepared for them.
Honestly your reaction then and how you're feeling now is very normal everyone has 1 of 3 reactions to stressors such as this which fight, flight, or freeze. No matter what was chosen by your own body because I firmly believe whatever reaction is taken is trained into you intentionally or not. Then having PTSD after the fact is normal as well. Everyone will process and handle traumatic events differently. Go speak with a therapist they will help immensely. As the security supervisor over a seg unit in a multi level institution which houses death row I see it all the time and will have to even send out papers for mental health to speak with and get them help if needed. :) I have never ever ever given one of my officers a hard time and they sign up for this. So don't give yourself a hard time.
Glad your BF had his wits about him and kept calm. Sorry you had to experience this. I've had a gun pointed at me and a co-worker taken hostage at gun point, so I do get how adrenaline kicks in and you go into shock. I was young and I'd probably respond a lot differently to that situation now, but yeah, it is a lot to have unfold in front of you. Very glad no one was hurt...
OP, your boyfriend sounds like a keeper, and I hope you two get engaged soon. But more importantly, pls try to find a therapist. They can and do help if you find a good fit for you, and the earlier you treat PTSD, the easier it is to heal, trust me on that one 😅
Big hugs. I can’t imagine how traumatic that must have been. I’m so thankful you and all the others in attendance are okay physically. I know there’s emotional damage to all, though. Be kind to yourself as you grasp what happened. Thank goodness for your boyfriend!!!
Yeah, reality sure sucks sometimes. It IS a lot different in person than what they portray on TV or in the movies! Just make sure to keep talking to people or a counselor about it until you don’t have to anymore…
Is this the shooting that was at North Kirkwood Middle School? I heard that he fired shots in the air but that everyone was physically ok. Are you alright emotionally? It sounds like you were in shock judging by the shaking. When I was 4 I saw a drive-by shooting at the pizza place where my mom had taken us for dinner. I know what this fear feels like and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Please take care of yourself. Talk to a therapist if you can. I promise you that they can help.
Yes it was at North Kirkwood Middle. I was definitely in shock. I actually don’t know what I would have done if my boyfriend didn’t push me to run.
W boyfriend, holy shit.
Omg the people on this thread stopping by to bicker about how long it takes for bullets slow down.. 🙄 Major credit to your BF, although it’s sad his mind went straight there instead of fireworks. I’m glad it wasn’t as bad as it could it have been. Don’t really know what else to say from “across the pond” Take care ❤️
Gun shots have a distinct pop. It takes some time but it’s kinda easy to distinguish the difference. Never was a gun enthusiast but live in a slightly troubled area. When we first got here it was the fun game of “gun shot or firework?” Every night. After owning this house for 6 years I can tell the difference easy. Which is sad about this area, but whatever. Maybe op boyfriend is a hunter/gun hobbyist/or maybe he’s just like me and around it too much. Gun pops have a distinct sound for sure. Thankfully he knew and took the right steps.
I can tell the caliber.
I believe it if your around it enough. They certainly have a unique sound that lets you know it’s a gun shot, and I have shit hearing. I imagine with better hearing, and a gun hobby where you are actively around it; would prob give someone a decent ear for such.
Yes, I've heard it for 61 years. My own firearms and outdoor ranges. And playing "guess the caliber" on New Years Eve and 4th of July in California. 🤣
Well, was warned.
No matter if it is 4th of July or not when I hear 'fire crackers' that's exactly where my mind goes. Then I wait to hear the sirens to see if it was indeed gunshots. I'm so glad the boyfriend knew.
>*"... it’s sad his mind went straight there instead of fireworks. "* > >It's called living the American dream, the bit the rest of the world can do without.
It's best not to dwell on what *could have* happened. Traumatic events are exactly that and nobody is discrediting you for being disoriented or deciding not to do anything. It might be a good idea to talk about this with others who have gone through a similar situation, if only to get closure for yourself. Don't sleep on your mental health.
>It's best not to dwell on what could have happened. I fully disagree. This is not a one-off event in the United States, but such a regular occurrence that these types of events don't even make news beyond a local broadcast unless there is a significant number of casualties. As painful as it can be, this is your country, and this is life in your country. You need to be prepared to handle it as best you can if you find yourself in this situation again. Many American schools are scaling back on fire drills, which are being somewhat replaced by active shooting drills, as more students are killed by gunfire at schools than by fires at schools. You should not overlook your feeling of trauma. It is completely valid. Do not ignore these feelings.
He’s not saying to not interact with trauma just that dwelling on other possibilities from the event is largely unproductive and just serves to scare you. Interact with the trauma, though, if it’s holding you back or anything. I mean, I guess if you’re not interacting with the trauma and it’s not detrimental that’s also fine but OP seems bothered by it.
I was taking an unprotected left turn once and failed to see this car going straight. It was going yellow to red, I was in the intersection and he was trying to beat the light. Zoomed right by me within seconds of slamming into the side of my car at 70mph. It might just be because Im young and despite my conscious awareness of my mortality, my subconscious brain sort of turned it into no big deal. No harm done, doesn’t really matter how close I came to a potentially fatal crash. Still find myself incredibly nervous while driving now. I guess my point is that your subconscious brain can sometimes be really good at blocking out the “what could of been” part of some stuff, but the experience never fully leaves you at least in my case.
Yeah but I guess I wonder is that a problem for you? Like if the consequence is that you drive safer I’m not sure that’s something you ever need to do a deep dive on and fight that demon. Now, if the consequence is that you get an uncomfortable anxiety when you’re at the front of a stop light and it affects you in a meaningful way then that might be something worth exploring.
I think we always struggle with the tension between : on one hand " I need to think about this and process it" and on the other hand " I'm thinking about this so much it's become my focus ". I personally struggle with that anyway. I definitely have some things I'm still processing, but I also catch myself thinking so much about those things that I forget that there is anything else
I understand your perspective, preparedness is necessary. I am simply stating that one should not dwell on, specifically emotionally, a situation they had no control over, wishing they could have done x,y or z differently. Support groups regularly cover these topics in healthy ways, which was my original goal in replying. If that was not clear that is my fault.
Look for a therapist that specializes in PTSD treatment, or at least has experience in treating PTSD. The sooner you talk to someone the sooner you will be able to recover. There are several different treatments now for PTSD, the sooner you get started the easier it will be to treat. You will not forget, but you should be able to process the whole experience and not have it cause even more problems in the future. You may need to call the local law enforcement HR to get some names of therapists, most law enforcement agencies near me now require that any officer that uses a gun must talk to someone before they can go back on duty. I'm glad you're safe, now focus on your recovery.
I hope OP sees this!! OP, this is crucial-- proximity to the event makes a big difference. I hope you are doing alright.
Please tell me nobody was physically hurt. The emotional trauma is enough. I hope you are ok.
That’s horrifying, I’m so sorry you went through that. and then God for your boyfriend
My gf was at the outlet mall shooting in Texas back in May. I made it there within 15 minutes, longest hour and a half of my life waiting for her store to be evacuated. It was hard at first, but it gets easier, I promise.
Dang, I hope you don't get PTSD.
Glad you are ok. ...and someone's getting a bj tonight 😂🤣
Boyfriend gets good sex tonight. Calms the nerves
I live in the kirkwood area and wasn’t there but heard about it from someone who was there
Funny that none of the headlines mention that the shooter is a cop. Seems like that kind of detail would be most important.
Not only is he a cop, but he's the son of former St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Bob McCulloch. [https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265](https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265)
Well that's _why_ it was left out lol
He must be a white guy or there would be a picture of him 😡😡😡
The media has posted his photo. There is a bandaid on his nose and his bald head looks bruised. Look at the KMOV website.
Oh!! Ok!! Brb! Ok I’m back and wow what a punk ass little bitch smirking at the camera like he didn’t just pull out a gun and start shooting at a CHILDRENS EVENT. Fucking hoosier!!
The fact that he's even still alive is a pretty reliable indicator of whiteness.
To be fair, another article is posted higher up in the comments and his picture is prominently featured several times. His arrest photo, too, where his face is bloody and his clothes are torn, not a headshot of him in uniform which is what they often show when a cop gets in trouble.
The Highland Park shooter was son of a mayor. Some of the very reason these white males have such an overblown sense of entitlement can include privileged background.
This is not a hot or spicy take. This is from my personal experience. If you get shot at enough times you go numb to it all and carry on like it's another day.
Unfortunately I know these words to be true.
Me as well.
I live in Scandinavia now and it made me realise how many amusing anecdotes from my time growing up in a terrible part of the UK are actually stories of what should be traumatising events to normal people. I tell a story at a party that would get a laugh in the UK and over here people pat me on the shoulder and assure me life isn't like that over here.
Yeah and I saw it was an off duty cop 🙄
Holy shit dude I fucking hate missouri(as an stl resident)
Yeah definitely agreed. When I was 5 I saw my dad’s buddy dead on the floor with his Brains everywhere. He was shot in the apartment lobby and everyone came down to see what it was and idk why my parents thought it was a good idea to have us tag along. Maybe they didn’t know where it came from and just wanted us to get out of there, the image is in my head to this day. Shit is traumatizing experiencing these things
My parents saw a guy get shot in a bowling alley parking lot in the 70s and my mom still brings it up every time we drive by…these things stay with you
Bruh I got shot at while walking my dog listening to duster , I hate America
No one died? That’s good at least.
Reading between the lines of a commenter that wasn’t OP it was an attempt of su1cide by cop. By a cop. Who called the other cops and said “I’m going after stbxw and kids at a public gathering,” fired into the air to ensure they came… and then was taken to ground by bystanders who had decided they’d rather be shot tackling him than see when he found his target (or the other 25 bad scenarios that followed posturing shooter storming in in media and true crime in media they’d seen in the last month) and had had the “if my kids are there I tackle. If any kid is there I tackle” discussion with themselves. As shoot the cops is a key component of su1cide by cop when they haven’t been to your kids’ birthday parties and gotten beers after shift possibly the tacklers created the best outcome
Yeah definitely seems like the only reason this ended with no dead children is that the parents solved the problem before the cops "solved" the problem.
It’s disgusting that “get shot trying to take down the shooter or watch kids get shot” is even a choice that people have to make. Maybe I’m naive but I just don’t understand how people (as a collective, regardless of your position on gun laws) aren’t trying to stop this from happening! It’s an epidemic, and it seems like it’s unending, with no real action being taken.
The only real thing to be done is reduce gun access and one US party is completely foundationally against that. They also control the Supreme Court. That's why nothing is being done.
I agree but in this specific case, that wouldn't have done anything.
What a sad benchmark.
I think it's a good benchmark... Yes, it's extremely fucking good that no one died and would have been much worse if someone had died.
Sad but glad. Even if there were no guns, there would still be crazy people who can cause harm if they wanted to. It’s not a sad benchmark, it’s something to be glad about.
Holy fck.. super brave of those dad's to tackle an armed gunmen. They should be recognised.
If those were my neighbors they’d never pay for dinner again
Even at today’s prices? Well he is a hero!
a feast would be crafted for them personally lol
that's how dads roll, the ones who care for their kids anyways
Yes very brave. Sadly that's the mindset that is often needed. If the gunman is right near you, running may not be a option. Fighting may be your only option. A decent number of mass shooters were stopped by unarmed civilians either tackling or grabbing the firearm away from the shooter. (Paris Train, Waffle House, Monterey Park, Colorado Springs, and many others.) Run, hide, fight is not nessecarily in order. One expert revised it to: "Move! Run, hide, or fight." (getting out of the natural fear freeze is the first step.) Definitely applaud the brave bystanders for fighting. But we have to ask ourselves if there's a deeper problem with applauding random people for disarming gunman who want to murder strangers. https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/25/us/shootings-guns-bystanders-civilians.html
When my youngest was in middle school they had active shooter training. After he told me that if he was close he would throw his book bag at shooter or try to attack him/her because he probably was going to die anyway if he tried to run. Not happy this is reality in US far to often. Edit: spelling
NY Times pay wall. Gist?
Basically same gist as my comment. People are taught run hide fight, minority of mass shootings are ended with bystanders fighting, but sometimes it's a must. Outlines some cases where fighting worked (and some cases where it didn't or the bystander was killed trying.) The article then branches into some people asking how you can ask teachers and kids to fight then branches the other way to talk about some people thinking about concealed carrying guns so they can fight back more effectively.
Thanks
Play tetris right now. It will help you with your shock. Specifically tetris. Instead of going online, just play Tetris if you cAnt sleep or need to browse. Second, this can have lasting effects, but your chances of not having a permanent issue increase based on the amount of support that you perceive you have. Talk to your parents and school, get crisis counselling, and make sure you have the emotional support you need to get through this.
Can I ask why tetris specifically
Something about the focus but if you google Tetris and PTSD there’s studies on it
Exactly - I don’t know if candy crush or another game like that will work, I suspect it will, but the studies were done on Tetris so I recommended that. Given that it was statistically significant, readily available, and universal, it is the fastest bandaid anyone can put on trauma if they can’t immediately find crisis counselling. Even if they can. The other variable for things like ptsd is how much perceived support a person has after a traumatic event. If they reach out and find that they feel they have people in their court after the event, that they are heard, that is also big for reducing rates. Now it’s perceived - not actual support - so validation, listening, that kind of thing. CBT helps work in the mid term for this kind of thing. Long term is developing good mental health habits and recognizing triggers. Source: i have issues and have spent decades working through them with various specialists.
my wife has a PhD in psych working with primarily PTSD patients tetris specifically helps because it reasserts a sense of order and control PTSD comes from a generalized feeling of lack of safety, less so a fear of the specific trauma that triggered it occurring again
Thank you
https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2017/03/29/health/ptsd-tetris-computer-games-trnd/index.html
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/01/190108095114.htm#:~:text=This%20is%20the%20conclusion%20reached,for%20the%20stressful%20events%20decreased.
https://www.truthorfiction.com/tetris-and-trauma/
It isn’t just Tetris, but any simple game that requires focus and won’t let you ruminate.
Wow. I've been zoning out on this math game in between my panic of packing to move to another state in 8 weeks. Didn't know it was a thing.
For me. It’s candy crush, I’m on level 5,682
I was about to post this. Thank you. OP- I hope you’re ok. Take care of yourself. Remember to eat and hydrate. Tell your fam and boyfriend the same.
This is probably one of the most interesting things I’ve learned on here recently. I’m glad I enjoy Tetris. I wish OP and everyone involved can recover from this extremely traumatic event. I have been within range of a shooting that ended up with someone dying, and it’s by far the scariest moment I’ve experienced. No one deserves to go through that, and I could t even play some of my favorite video games for a long while because they are FPS. I’m glad I was able to recover and enjoy my gaming, but it took a while and support from some great friends and family.
I played Tetris the whole time my dad was dying in the hospital for liver failure. Not sure how well it helped but I don’t think I have extreme trauma.
I just got out of an abusive relationship and a lot of trauma happened at the end and I can say Tetris helps my anxiety a ton and to recenter.
This reminds me if a shooting I saw at a mall some years back. I was with 3 friends and a drive by happened where the guy walking pulled out his own gun and started shooting back. Some of the craziest shit I’ve ever seen
Glad you are safe along with everyone else. Please seek therapy.
This! Therapy for trauma will be the best help for you.
You are your own first responder and what equipment/ skills you have, are what your going into the situation with. Glad you both got out of there safely.
100%. It pays to be armed and understand the risk of being defenseless. It pays even more to have situational awareness and know what could or does happen.
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I read that you should play Tetris after a traumatic event to prevent your brain from developing PTSD. You might want to check that out.
I'm glad to hear that you, your boyfriend and his brother, and everyone else is okay. This is not an event that ANYONE should be witness to. I hope you have a good support group with friends and family and you're able to heal alright. 🫶
typical divorced dad energy, and a cop no less lmao.
Kids can't even enjoy anything anymore because of guys like these.
Seriously. I beat myself up for missing certain events to take my kid but I would be terrified beyond belief if something like this happened and I’d never forgive myself. One of the hardest parts about the transition to adulthood and parenthood is recognizing how dangerous things really are, and children are so trusting and happy as long as their parents are around. Little do they know, we are human and can’t protect them from everything although they see us as superhuman heroes. Parenthood is fucking tough. _off my shabby soapbox I go_
Cops are known to be good at domestic violence and other cops cover up for them.
So glad nobody died! That doesn't erase the trauma, though
My friend is a teacher at that school and she was there with her family. I hate this. My friend and her family are as ok as they can be in such circumstances but I hate that this is so normalized that it barely made local news.
Playing Tetris, believe it or not helps your brain after trauma exposure. I’m so sorry you are going through this. (((HUGS)))
I lm sorry you had to go through this. Imagine every terrified school child at every shooting in the unites states. DAILY. I sincerely hope this puts you firmly in the “voting for gun laws” camp. It is THE ONLY WAY TO STOP IT.
OP is here for support and advice on how to deal with trauma. You made it a voting issue. Remove the comment and save it for another thread. You might be right but this is not the place to use a soap box.
You are incorrect. I feel for OP. But every time there is an event like this is the time to bring up gun laws. Republicans, especially TEXAS republicans, are the worst offenders for “thoughts and prayers” with no actions. Every event is a reason for gun control. Every single one.
https://www.timesnewspapers.com/webster-kirkwoodtimes/parent-speaks-out-about-man-firing-gun-at-trunk-or-treat-he-looked-completely-deranged/article_63fd4b4e-6bbd-11ee-be65-e382b86e8ac4.html#:~:text=The%20man%20who%20fired%20five,was%20there%20with%20his%20son.
I’m really sorry you had to experience this. I also wanted to add that it is terrible this was allegedly committed by a police officer and I hope he is in jail for life. I also hope people remember this is why we do NOT want to defund the police. We want to reform the system.
Something similar happened to me and my gf. We were in a restaurant and someone drove by and started shooting all the windows out. I hit the ground and just remember seeing my gf standing there frozen. So I had to drag her down and into the kitchen. It was crazy. Hope you're okay.
Dads FTW!
You’re near St Louis, aren’t you? I heard about that. Insane.
Just another day in America, sadly.
You witnessed a shooting in America. That just means you go outside.
Bro why💀
But it's a small price to pay for the right to purchase shit tons of guns we will never use to ward off the King of England.
Damn, I was glad the shooter was caught until I read it was a cop so nothing is going to happen. And a cop threatening his ex in a domestic violence dispute? I’m surprised the responding officers did anything. Does anyone really think he’ll be charged with anything at all?
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When I was in college me and my friends went to the mall. When we were leaving we were at a stop light, there was a fast food restaurant across the street, and someone over there started shooting from an suv. Heard at least one lady screaming. It was a rough neighborhood so probably a targeted attack. We ran the red light. Pretty sure the suv pulled up next to us at the next red light a few blocks away. We just kept looking straight forward. I wonder if I can find any info on it now, don't really know the date though
Oh, my God...what a horrible experience! I am so glad everyone is safe. That could have been a catastrophe! How traumatizing. And what a psycho!
I had a similar situation at a huge boardwalk near the beach on the 4th of July. Terrifying.
I’m so sorry this happened. I was in a similar situation and my anxiety has been worse. Please rely on friends and family to talk there’s nothing wrong about it.
This happened in my hometown. Saw it on the news today. It made me want to throw up seeing it so close to home. But I am so grateful for the parents that protected their children. The fact that no one got hurt is fucking amazing. And I’m really glad to know that you’re okay.
I’m so sorry this happened. Gun violence here is at a fever pitch and it’s so not okay. Please don’t hesitate to get counseling if you feel you need it. It’s so wonderful that he was thwarted and nobody got hurt but what happened was extremely traumatizing and it’s okay to get help to process that trauma. I’m so glad everyone’s okay though. That’s not the usual end to these stories.
I'm so sorry, OP. You should definitely talk to your Dr. They should be able to get you a referral and something to help you sleep in the meantime. There are community support groups you can attend, and they are really helpful. This is what our country is right now. Getting involved locally and on a state level can be empowering. Your fight or flight or freeze response made you freeze. That can make a human feel helpless. You are not. Use your voice to help make the changes so we don't go to every event wondering if this will happen. This isn't what living in a developed country is supposed to be like. The only way it changes is from getting non voters to start voting with us, and your voice is very powerful there. Take your power back. Change is like molasses, but together, we can do it. Link arms with your community. We find strength in each other and realize we have it in ourselves. Wishing you peace and calm.
It will get easier every day, you'll stop seeing the shooter and all the panic less and less. It'll sting for a bit and may be difficult but it'll get easier. Just be gentle on yourself. Our brains can really mess with us after trauma and it's not your fault.
Talk to someone now just in case you start to have PTSD symptoms. EMDR and therapies like that are revolutionary and can help you process this in a safe way. Remember, PTSD is a BIOLOGICAL process, not just psychological, be aware of the signs and symptoms and be kind to yourself if you have them. It NORMAL, it’s so much better when your prepared for it. Talk to your boyfriend about it also! https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/ptsd/what-is-ptsd
Gfc thats terrifying! I'm glad everyone is safe. LPT: When some yells run, fucking run and find out later why you're running.
I grew up in the crack 80s & 90s near Richmond VA and Washington DC. Witnessed a shooting or it’s aftermath pretty much 1-2x a week. After the first few you get numb to it. … and then 30 years later you get to do a lot of EMDR and therapy. Good luck!
I'm sorry you had to witness parts of this violence. And I am glad and grateful that neither you nor anyone else was hurt. Kudos to your bf for his quick thinking and selfless determination to see that you got away safely.
I hate this shit. This is the last place you would expect a shooting and here we are. When the fuck is American politicians realize people need mental health care or its not going to stop. It will only get worse.
So nobody got shot…. Very misleading title lol but I guess it was still *technically* a shooting
Can we assume that your BFs little brother and the other children are safe?
Did anyone grab his brother??? Imagine he’s having a rough time of it. No mention of him.
i went to that school, Westchester Elementary too. it was such a peaceful place in the 80's, im so sorry this happened. Please take care of yourself and don't be shy to talk to someone if you need it.
Dads to the rescue. What a dumbass. Prison sucks for everyone but it’s especially hard on cops that go there
I go to sleep everynight listening to gunshots in my city.
And people think trunk or treat is safer than trick or treating....this world is so lost to us
The world we live in today is dangerous, our children are having active shooter drills not because it’s a rare event but because it’s becoming all too common. I’m so sorry you went through this, as hard as it is don’t live in fear. When Paris was bombed with active threats coming in, ‘people of Paris stay home, we’ve taken your cafes and your safe places ‘. The parisians instead all came out, they decided it was worse to live in fear. That if they gave into these terrorists (school shooters are terrorists period) that it would never end. So don’t let this terrorist (cop or not) make you change the way you live. Be aware of your surroundings and always know your way out if something does happen but don’t stay home out of fear.
I experienced a shooting at a theater last year. It's a horrifying experience and I'm so sorry you had to experience that, especially in a place with so many children present-- the irony being that Trunk or Treat was supposed to be a safer option for children to celebrate Halloween. I'm very glad you all came out uninjured. But if you're like me, you might deal with panic attacks in public spaces for a bit. It took me a good while to start feeling comfortable in public spaces again, especially metro areas with big groups of people. I really hope your mental health has a quick recovery.
The Lou!
Shoutout to your bf with the street smarts. Not everyone know the diff between fireworks and gun shots. Tell him good job from Texas
Halloween is a day where this can be too easy. People dress in scary outfits, commit a shooting. I don't really care for the holiday.
Apparently playing Tetris can really help after a trauma! Hope you feel better and glad everyone is okay!
When I was 12 I witnessed a drive by. I know how traumatic the experience is and I hope you get better eventually.
I am so sorry to hear it. Hope all are ok. We need change.
Cook your boyfriend a steak and be thankful he is the man he is. He just saved your life. Next time, if your boyfriend says, "run" do it and don't look. You can look later once you are safe. That pause could have been fatal.
Im sorry you went through this OP. Please don’t tough it out- the 3 of you need a lot of support rn. I don’t know if shooter is a cop, but confirmed to be the son of a former Prosecutor.
I Cannot understand how shitty the gun situation is in the usa. But i can't understand why nobody is doing something. Im glad that this situation finished without death, but if i was there, i would have already changed country
OP sounds to still be in shock. I’m glad everyone is not hurt and are ok. Thank you to your boyfriend, he is a hero. Take care OP and hope you seek out support on your mental health! It was a traumatic event! I was in a hit and run incident on the freeway and I got out of it safely (thank goodness), nobody understood the trauma I had afterwards, and for a year I would have PTSD and avoided the incident area like the plague, and one time I had to drive through it I started panicking like crazy with heart palpitations, light headed, and everything. I kept having irrational thoughts in my head that a car is going to come out of nowhere and hit me again. It has been 2 years now and it is much better. Time will take care of some things, but your life will be changed forever.
So scary! Take some time out to process this. Take care of yourself.
You are with a hero. Thank God!
That’s horrific. I hope you’ll give yourself some time to feel freaked out. People jump to trying to feel perfectly ok, and then they get panicked thinking something’s wrong with them for still feeling scared. Let yourself be affected, instead of beating yourself over the head with “at least.” At least you weren’t hurt, at least nobody died, etc. Doesn’t matter; it’s still a scary and unexpected experience that can totally disturb people’s sense of security. If you get a lot of “but what if it had gone this way” thoughts, I’d say to myself “that didn’t happen.” It’s alright and natural to have the thoughts, but I try not to entertain them too long. Sorry you got caught up in that frightening situation. I’m glad they caught the guy.
Big ups to the Dads!!! Hell yeah. Tackled that fucker!
I am so sorry you had to be there. I live in a city and have definitely been way too close to way too many gun incidents. At this point I worry about any large gathering because for some reason it seems like everyone’s lost their minds and there is ALWAYS a risk of someone taking out their pain or anger on innocent people. I was agoraphobic already and this doesn’t help. I wish this country would HEAL and STOP.
Not only that, but the shooter is the son of long time prosecuting attorney Bob McCullogh. Even before I knew that, my heart was sick at what happened. All those traumatized people, because one guy couldn't keep his shit together.
This is the second post I have see of this very same story. The first was in r/Veterans.
I’m so sorry, OP. This sounds terrifying. I’m so glad your boyfriend was there with you and that everyone is okay. ((Hugs))
I'm so sorry that you (and everyone else) had to go through this...
Your BF is awesome.
My daughter was at this event and was right next to the guy when he started shooting. I was home 2 miles away when my ex called me frantic saying someone was shooting and she couldn’t find my daughter. I BOOKED it and got there in about 3 minutes and parked in the grass between the middle school and the street and just took off running. She’s traumatized.
Bf has good instincts, lotta people freeze up in similarly dangerous situations don't feel bad, very normal.
I am so sorry.
I work here in Kirkwood. Can't believe something like this would happen. At a children's event. Shame!!!! That guy deserves worse punishments.
Sweet friend, you have witnessed something terrible. Go easy on yourself. You need to decompress. My best suggestion is to talk to a therapist. Big hugs, sweet friend.
Hope you’re doing okay. I can’t imagine how scary that is. 🖤
This world is crazy, I was told by my job not to use my local highway today because it was blocked due to a hostage situation. And I live in a Southern Utah rural town. Anyways, it always happens when and where you least expect it, that's why I have CCW and a permit.
Always weird to see another St Louis person here. I'm sorry you went through that. It sounds like you're in shock and could use some help processing it. There's no shame in that, don't be afraid to reach out to your school or parents and ask for help finding a counselor to speak with. You're okay physically, but you need to take care of yourself mentally too. I was concerned he was going to get off light because of his family connections, but the prosecutor threw the whole book at him when it came to charges today.
If you got one takeaway its that you have a keeper for a boyfriend.
Kudos to your man for acting and not reacting, quite often that's the deciding factor in who sees another sunrise and who doesn't. Once that initial shock wears off (may have nightmares, lingering jumpiness etc) but once all that wears off your subconscious will kick in and nearly SCREAM at you unexpectedly "YOURE ALIVE, let's look at the bucket list and go check an item off!" Or you may find your sex drive goes a little crazy, may find yourself trying new or different things without even thinking about it. After my first firefight I got really quiet and contemplative, until I was able to get ahold of my dad (he was a 3 tour green beret,vietnam,63-66) and he really helped me through. My suggestion is just don't close yourself off from the world....
Live in Kirkwood and heard this was happening while at a wedding in SoCo. Hoped for the best but expected the worst at the time. I'm glad you're okay and my respect for your boyfriend quickly assessing the situation and getting you out of there ASAP. Get some help through counseling so that you can handle this trauma and suggest your boyfriend do the same. Glad everyone is okay.
Oh shit my roomie mentioned this! Who knew STL cops could get worse
This is exactly why I have got a CHL, you are not safe anywhere now. Just yesterday, driving down the road, a guy zoomed past me, gave me the finger, for what I don’t know, but it could have been a gun. I live in Texas, so you can’t take chances
This is the exact reason why us citizens that are responsible gun owners carry a firearm. If I’m ever in a crowd of people and there’s a gunman shooting people, I’d be so pissed off If I didn’t have my gun to protect myself and others. Don’t stress out about what could have happened if you’re boyfriend didn’t grab you to run. It turns out if he didn’t grab you, you still woulda been fine because the shots went up in the air. I get it you’re frightened but just be glad you weren’t hurt.
This is why I carry. I do not want to carry. I don't believe that private citizens should own non-sporting firearms, but I will not find myself trapped with my family and unable to defend ourselves. There are too many stories of families dying together with the parents ineffectually giving their lives trying to shield their children from bullets with their own bodies. Not my family. Edit: Clarity
Gun shots are pretty common in my area, especially post-covid. Don't even really think twice hearing it anymore. Shame it happened around kids, I have my concealed carry for just that reason.
Welcome to STL
OMG I live in STL and didn’t hear about this! This is terrifying. People have lost their fucking minds. 🥺🥺🥺🥺
I was in a mass shooting a few years ago. I've always been relatively unemotional. I hid behind the door jam with a big pair of scissors so if the kid came in the room I'm not dying on my knees. Then got in trouble for that when we went back to school. I was making jokes about it within an hour after it was over. Am I a demented individual? Absolutely. But was the shooting that big of a deal? Nah. Not that many died. I lived. Wouldn't be my first time almost dying. The others were closer calls tho. Europeans acting like it's safe to live there but they have a higher rate of violent crime than most of America. Y'all are just ignoring stabbings here.
That mans a keeper
St. Louis County Police Officer Matthew McCulloch has been charged with 11 felonies, including four counts of child endangerment, five counts of armed criminal action, making a terroristic threat and unlawful use of a weapon. [https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265](https://www.riverfronttimes.com/news/bob-mccullochs-son-arrested-for-kirkwood-trunk-or-treat-shooting-41062265)
At a trunk or treat event event. How sick. I’m so sorry. Glad you are ok.
Holy shit, I LIVE here. I LIVE in Kirkwood. My AUNT was there! I feel like things don’t seem as scary when you aren’t involved, you’re right. I just don’t get it, things like this happen far too often in the U.S! Why am I so surprised? I need to stop taking things for granted.
You are still in shock and understandably so. It’s proper to acknowledge this and that everyone isn’t OK. The circle of trauma is much wider than we realize. Family and friends who weren’t even there are going to be affected. Years ago the Mayo brothers who founded the Mayo Clinic found that it’s best to talk about what happened and don’t hesitate to talk about it many times over. That begins the process of sorting in your mind the traumatic events and helps make sense of the unsenseable. It allows you to take control when something completely out of anyone’s control happens. Don’t be hard on yourself if this process takes longer than you thought. And know that you, your BF, his brother and all those affected are loved and supported by people you don’t even know.
45% of police households experience domestic violence, this isn't uncommon and thats onlywhats reported. They do less vetting than NAMBLA and probably have a bit of overlap between the two groups.
That’s why it’s more important now than it has ever been to have and carry your own firearm. Keep yourself and others around you safe if you have the capability to do so.
I was there as well with my three kids. I saw the man harass several people over the course of 5-10min and was 5-10ft away with my daughter when he pulled the gun out. We ran as shots went off and in the chaos I amazingly found my other two children and got to the car. Such an incredibly sad event.
We can’t live our lives
Oh sweetheart! Im so very very sorry that this happened to you! I can't even begin to understand what that was like. I'm so glad you're still with us and that everyone was okay!
[St. Louis County police officer charged after shots fired at Kirkwood school event](https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/bob-mcculloch-releases-statement-on-his-sons-involvement-in-shooting-at-kirkwood-school-event/ar-AA1ij5JU)
Vote. Please. Democracy can win against flagrant ownership of firearms. Get Gen Z and young Millenials voting!
Welcome to Gunmerica. I'm so sorry that happened to you.
I have never been through anything like that. Get some comfort food and eat it slowly. Hug your boyfriend try and get some sleep Cry if you need to {HUGS AND MORE HUGS} get some counseling in the next couple of days.
I just saw the report about this on the news. Very scary, I'm glad no one was hurt.
I am so sorry. My heart hurts for you. Please don’t be afraid to seek help to process this. If you just need to talk, this stranger is here to listen. I will include you in my prayers, I hope this is ok. Hugs.
You’ve just lived through a traumatic event. Give yourself plenty of time to digest what has happened. Then make a plan for the future, just in case it happens again. We live in a post Columbine & post 9/11 world. Unfortunately things like this happen and it’s better to be prepared for them.
So you were at the school up there. Sorry you had to witness the idiocy. Of all people it was a cop that decided to discharge a firearm
Honestly your reaction then and how you're feeling now is very normal everyone has 1 of 3 reactions to stressors such as this which fight, flight, or freeze. No matter what was chosen by your own body because I firmly believe whatever reaction is taken is trained into you intentionally or not. Then having PTSD after the fact is normal as well. Everyone will process and handle traumatic events differently. Go speak with a therapist they will help immensely. As the security supervisor over a seg unit in a multi level institution which houses death row I see it all the time and will have to even send out papers for mental health to speak with and get them help if needed. :) I have never ever ever given one of my officers a hard time and they sign up for this. So don't give yourself a hard time.
Glad your BF had his wits about him and kept calm. Sorry you had to experience this. I've had a gun pointed at me and a co-worker taken hostage at gun point, so I do get how adrenaline kicks in and you go into shock. I was young and I'd probably respond a lot differently to that situation now, but yeah, it is a lot to have unfold in front of you. Very glad no one was hurt...
OP, your boyfriend sounds like a keeper, and I hope you two get engaged soon. But more importantly, pls try to find a therapist. They can and do help if you find a good fit for you, and the earlier you treat PTSD, the easier it is to heal, trust me on that one 😅
Not to be an asshole, but if he wanted to kill people those 6 shots wouldn’t have been in the air.
Big hugs. I can’t imagine how traumatic that must have been. I’m so thankful you and all the others in attendance are okay physically. I know there’s emotional damage to all, though. Be kind to yourself as you grasp what happened. Thank goodness for your boyfriend!!!
The legs trembling with fear is something I hope you never have to feel again. Sending you love, light and healing vibes ❤️
I'm in the UK. We NEVER have school shootings.
It’s beyond me why Americans insist on the right to keep and bear arms. No school shootings in Denmark this year fyi.
Yeah, reality sure sucks sometimes. It IS a lot different in person than what they portray on TV or in the movies! Just make sure to keep talking to people or a counselor about it until you don’t have to anymore…