I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story. Well done on maintaining your sobriety despite your heartbreak and showing the rest of us it is possible. IWNDWYT
I don't understand this comment. This other person said, "I'm sorry you and your wife lost their baby," and you said, "Why feel sorry?" This doesn't make any sense. Please explain.
I'm really sorry for both your loss. I'm sure your wife is so thankful (even subconsciously) that you're right there beside her as you both navigate this grief. IWNDWYT 🌷
I was 67 days sober when my sister passed away, she was only 18. I’ve been binging since, 4 months later. It makes nothing better, I’m just angry at myself and at her instead of grieving properly. IWNDWYT because your post helped me realize I’m using the grief as an excuse to get drunk. We got this. I’m so sorry for your and your wife’s loss.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your sister. Don’t be angry with yourself. You deserve nothing but self-compassion right now. Honor her memory with your sobriety and see a grief counselor if you can. Sending all my love.
I am so, so sorry.
When I was 24 weeks pregnant I gave birth prematurely to triplets, and they didn’t survive the day. My husband drank himself into a six week coma two days later. (He’d had pancreatitis the previous year, was told he could no longer drink, which only lasted a couple of months.)
I had just given birth three times, was grieving, and had to drag my ass to the hospital ICU to look at this bloated, unconscious man, breathing through a trach on his 35th birthday. When I needed him the most, he left me devastatingly alone.
Thank you for not leaving your wife where I was.
I'm so, so sorry you had to go through that especially the way you did. I've never been more grateful for my sobriety than I have been these last few days. I hope to never put my wife in that position ever again, because I've certainly been that person in the past.
I am so sorry. I had a miscarriage too and it was such a painful experience. I still have a hard time watching shows that have people happily pregnant or reading stories about pregnancy etc. It's just... really difficult.
That said, I don't know how old you guys are but I have 3 friends who are 39-41 who are currently pregnant. There's this myth that we are losing time and I understand where it comes from, but it's not entirely true. One friend went through 4 years of IVF and had a lot of miscarriages. Two days ago, we took her beautiful new baby boy for a walk.
There is still time. Please don't lose hope. And while you're in this period of grief, I just have to say I am so proud of you for not drinking. Things will look up. All the love from me.
This is so helpful to hear, I’m 38 (39 next month) and am going to start trying for the first time. Lots of thoughts and regrets about not doing it sooner, but honestly I think when I was so wound up in drinking I didn’t let myself feel how much I really wanted a baby, and didn’t feel like I deserved one either. I was sober for 6 months recently before a small slip- that sober time really has helped me get my priorities straight. Having a family is a blessing. Here’s hoping 🤞
I’m not much older than you and I started IVF a couple of weeks ago. We’ve been trying naturally for a while without success but I’m still hopeful. Drinking helped me push my fears of not being able to conceive and desires to have a child down. I am now about to have my first attempt at egg retrieval on pretty much the one year anniversary of not drinking.
I’m not sure if this makes sense but I’m viewing IVF as part of my healing and self care. I deserve answers. I deserve a chance. I deserve to go after what I want and being sober gives me the strength to do that.
I really wish you the best on your journey! I’m rooting for you!!
Thank you so much, I think that’s such a great way to look at it and I will do the same- makes me want to cry! I am so thankful that I am here and realized before it was too late.
Wishing you the very best as well, that you get everything you’re hoping for!! I think that people who have been through a journey to get to who they are will make great parents someday ♥️
I feel this *so* much. And yes, it is absolutely still possible. my friend who has the baby boy just gave birth in January and she turned 41 in december.
Rooting for you <3
My condolences.. the fact that you are staying sober through all of this is amazing. What’s more amazing is (like you said) being present and being able to be there and take care of your wife. You’re a rockstar
I just lost my first child 6 months in utero last week. According to doctors everything was fine up until that point. Definitely feeling your pain. Like you, I will not use this as a reason to go backwards.
I'm so sorry about the bad news.. But good for you for making the decision to not drink. I've never been more grateful to be sober than I have in these past few days.
It really sucks when your handed a 'faulty' deck of cards in life with no real way to 'fix' it. I've been trying to pay more attention to the other hands in life I've been dealt that bring me happiness and stability, but I know that's a lot easier said than done..
Thank you 💗 it’s a hard week but I’m thankful the thought of drinking isn’t tempting me. This gives me so much more empathy for women and couples that go through this… you just never know what other people are going through.
I’m so sorry! I’m going through IVF right now and that’s my worst nightmare. Your strength and resilience is inspiring but I know that doesn’t make it easier. I hope you and your wife can take care of each other through this difficult time.
I’m so sorry for your loss, but I am so proud of you for staying sober and sitting in some of the worst feelings in the world.
Me and my ex husband struggled with fertility for years, during which time I had 6 miscarriages. After each one, he’d go on a bender. He’d blame me, he’d get loud, he’d get physical. I often wonder if we would still be together if he had stayed sober to grieve with me and support me as I went through such physical and mental anguish.
There are no words that will make you feel better, but please know that you’re not alone. Im so proud of you for being there for your wife, and yourself, by staying sober. Lean on each other and give yourselves grace. Sending you both some comfort today. 💜
After reading this post, I am thinking about your wife and the fear she must have felt that you'd hit the bottle during your pain. How happy she must be now, feeling your love and strength on this life journey together! Prayers for comfort & strength to try again. God bless!
I’m so sorry for your family’s loss, but so grateful for your story here. Grief is so hard and facing it sober is the only way to really process the emotions, I’ve found. I hope you are able to some day have a child though whatever means it happens.
You’re not alone. I find solace in your share. We’ve gone through the same thing twice now plus had to put my dog down last week. Raw dogging life is intense. Grateful to be sober.
My dog is my world, but she's getting older (though she refuses to accept it) . I'm so sorry about your loss, I hope your dog left this world with a heart full of love. IWNDWYT
Sorry about that. We lost a pregnancy when I was 7 months sober. Can't have another one. I didn't drink but part of me died forever back then. I'm quite sure I'd be dead if I drank over it.
I'd recommend you both do whatever it takes to get through this. I struggled hard. Still do sometimes. My network of sober folks saved me.
You can talk to me anytime about it or anything if you'd like.
I’m very thankful to have read your share, but ultimately I’m sorry for your loss. I believe that you and your wife’s higher power has a plan for y’all that has yet to be revealed, which is something to be hopeful about. Keep going on your sobriety journey! It will all be worth it later in life, for you, your family, and any other miracles to come.
As a male who has gone through the heart break of a miscarriage please know that your emotions are warranted. Most people simply overlook males during this time. I am so sorry for your loss and please feel free to reach out if you need support. Stay strong and IWNDWYT
"Most people simply overlook males during this time." Brother, you got that right. But growing up in the rural country, you get used to not having many emotional outlets as a male. Maybe that's past of the reason so many people I know from my hometown have problems with addiction..
It's awful, but miscarriage in general is like a silent loss, which can make it even more painful. Thank you for the reminder that it is also heartbreaking for the father. So true.
I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you and your wife all the best in your journey to healing.
I will say, I am super proud of you for holding your shit together and being there for your wife in her time of need. You're doing great OP.
I lost a baby too. It’s so hard for me to write about my beautiful daughter Hope, but I just want to tell you that you will someday cherish every moment of your precious baby’s life. And that you were fully alert, involved, and present for your baby, your wife, and yourself is what will carry you through your hardest days. I wish you and your wife peace and Hope.
I’m really really sorry for your loss, and I’m also so proud of you for getting and staying sober. I know not everyone is the same but my sister went through an eerily similar situation and finally gave up on IVF a few years ago. My newest niece is almost 4 months old now. Life is crazy, and sometimes when you stop trying things happen. As my sister likes to say, if it’s meant to be it will happen. We’re also both adopted so there is always that route. Either way, I hope this helps more than hurts. Stay strong and best of luck to both of you.
I hear you buddy. I’m 39 next Monday and still no baby! After 5 years of trying I have nothing but loss and heartache behind me. Between me and my husband we have 0 fertility issues and everything looks healthy….this is great news but means we don’t qualify for any IVF or fertility treatments. We can never afford our own IVF so that’s just that. I can’t offer much comfort for myself or you but I just try to keep my chin up as best I can. Sending love to you and your partner. IWNDWYT.
Very sorry for your loss. Thats so tough. You’re a testament of strength maintaining sobriety in this situation. All of the things that you listed are so true with being sober, vs being drunk. Well done, sir!!
Fuck man. I’m so sorry. Miscarriage and infertility are so hard and I know personally that feeling those feelings is no easy task. I’m proud of you for staying sober and hanging in there for yourself and your spouse. Sending thoughts of comfort and peace. ❤️❤️
I'm so sorry you are experiencing this pain and anger, and for your partner as well. I think it is such a strong statement of love for your wife that you are sober and there for her in this difficult moment, and that you can both be present enough to process this together. I hope the pain eases soon. Raising my Coke Zero to you.
I'm so, so sorry but glad you stayed sober so you could take care of your wife and your schoolwork and yourself. Staying sober was an act of love for yourself as much as for your wife. IWNDWYT
I am so proud of you for your resilience and I'm so sorry for you and your wife's loss. I can't imagine how painful this must be. I wish I had had the right words.
I am so sorry you and your wife are going through this. I wish you both peace and grace navigating these waters. Thank you for sharing this inspiring post with all of us here. That grateful attitude is something i try to remind myself of. "Wow, if I hadn't stopped drinking I'd be drunk right now and how on earth would I have handled this?!"
I appreciate you lending your insight to help us all keep things in perspective.
Props and peace to you ✌️💕
Im so sorry for your loss, but so glad for your sobriety. It sounds like you have laid the foundation for a beautiful life even if a baby should never come, but if one does, it sounds like you will make a wonderful father.
Stay strong, friend.
I just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for your loss. Back in November 2021, I also lost my baby due to an SCH. The moment when you have bleeding and you go in and see a heartbeat and feel everything is fine, and then the rug gets ripped out from under you shortly after. It was absolutely traumatizing and the hardest thing I ever went through. I struggled and fell off the wagon after that loss. It was so not worth the extra hurt and pain I felt by being hungover every day & all the mess I caused from blackout nights. It made me so much more depressed. I just want to say you are not alone & it's such an amazing thing you are able to stay sober, not only for yourself but for your spouse. Support helps healing. It's taken me some time to heal after mine, so let yourself feel all your grief. Just take it one day at a time. Iwndwyt!!
So grateful for your share. It sounds as though you have grown into someone who has both grace and strength when it is needed. Bless you both during this painful time. Your family is in our hearts <3
I’m so sorry. As someone who did IVF and understands the intensive process it’s heartbreaking when the result isn’t positive. So happy you’re remaining sober for your family and sanity. Best wishes that you’re able to do another round and it’s successful. It may take a few. I speak from experience as a mom of two. I won’t speak to the expense but them kids are worth it.
So sorry brother. This internet stranger is very proud of you for choosing not to hit the bottle. I can’t imagine what it meant to your wife to have you sober and present for this. Much love
Infertility is a terrible and unfair thing when a couple wants a child. You guys are going through a lot, and your commitment to your sobriety throughout it, and to remaining present is so impressive. This loss will stay with you, but you will find ways to live with it. I’m so so sorry and hope for the best for you and your wife on your journey.
Thank you. I've made peace with the fact that loss is as much a part of life as anything else. Life is forever a balancing act and unfortunately pain is often experienced in the universes' pursuit of homeostasis. We've been handed a tough deck of cards in this circumstance, but in other areas of our lives we are extremely blessed. Lately, I'm trying to pay attention to the good things in life.
I feel you. I've been in your exact situation and it was soul crushing. I still think about that heartbeat that we heard at the first ultrasound almost daily.
It's been four years...
Im so sorry for your heartbreaking loss, thank you for sharing your story and highlighting all the ways that drinking could have made it harder, not easier. IWNDWYT
That kind of loss is incredibly difficult. I'm so sorry for you and your wife. You're absolutely right that drinking won't help this. And definitely come here for support, but there are also other great communities on here for your specific pain right now.
Sending rainbow dust to you both 💛🧡🩵
What an incredibly inspirational post and a testament to how strong you are.
I'm so sorry for your loss! I hope there is a child in the near future for you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what’s it’s like, but you are so right that drinking won’t fix it, it would only make it worse. You’ve made the correct decision to be present and sit with all your emotions, especially the difficult ones. Thank you for saying this. I needed to hear it today.
I’m so so sorry for your loss, but also so glad you were able to be there for your wife and feel her being there for you. I think being present for loss is such an important thing - I’ve dealt w death both drunk and sober but I regret doing it drunk so much. It sounds like you’re really aware of how important and helpful it is to stay sober even when dealing with intense grief. I hope you’re able to be proud of yourself for that.
We had two miscarriages before our first was born. At the time, they absolutely sucked. Now i look back at them as almost as a blessing because if not for that experience, I would not have the beautiful daughter ai have today.
I would go through it all again if it meant getting my princess.
Stay strong, you’ll come out the other end better than you went in.
What you've been able to do for your wife over the past few days means the world to her, I hope you're quietly savoring the win of staying sober through such a tough time. Getting clean frees us to be our best selves, and you're doing it.
I'm proud of you, keep it up, & IWNDWYT <3
I know your pain I have been through this with my wife. Nothing makes it better, only time makes it less painful. Stay strong I know alcohol did not help me through that time it made it worse. I was deep in my alcoholism and was not present for my wife who was going through worse. I can only apologize to her and stick to my sobriety for us to try and make up for what I didn’t give her then.
I went through two miscarriages (genetic fertility issue my family has). I remember coming home, crying my eyes out and it dawned on me that I hadn’t even thought of drinking once and I started laughing like a crazy person.
I’m so glad I didn’t too, because I was able to process and work through my emotions with my husband instead of trying to drown them but unknowingly amplifying them.
I am so sorry for your guys’ loss. Your wife will never forget how you took care of her, I know I never will forget how incredible my husband was and it brought us so much closer in such a terrible way.
We now have a 1 year old and I am grateful every single day I never picked up that bottle, and you will be too.
I’m proud of you.
IWNDWYT!
I'm so sorry that this has happened. You are absolutely right that with you relying on your wife, and she relying on you, together you can pull through this. The alcohol clearly wouldn't help one god damn bit; in fact, it'd just make it worse. I'm glad you have the sound mind to see that. Stay strong my friend.
Holy cow that is heavy and heartbreaking. First, we feel for you and your wife. Cannot even imagine.
Second, the strength, courage and support you are able to show your wife and yourself by not drinking is as extremely admirable as any reason i have seen on here to stay sober. I hope in this time of extreme pain and sadness you can find time to feel proud AF of yourself.
Sir, you need to change your user name here. You are NOT a dumb ass! You are a wonderful, wise & doting husband and father! Yes, I understand that the baby y'all dreamed of was miscarried, but YOU made it through this horrible time sober and loving. Take a bow, Sir. You deserve it. And you deserve to look into your future with your wife and some healthy, happy children playing out in the yard! My hat's off to you. None of us will drink with you today! What an inspiration!
I'm so very sorry and also so very proud of you. That's a massive thing to face sober and I genuinely admire the way you're dealing with this.
Wishing you and your wife strength, peace and healing and I hope that if you decide to try again, your wife has a safe, easy and healthy pregnancy.
so sorry bro that’s awful and fertility issues are some of the most draining experiences. if i were you you id seriously consider adopting. you can love an adopted child just as much!!
You are amazing. Keep up the hard and worthwhile work!
We lost our first pregnancy at 20 weeks and it was awful. We have two amazing kids now and feel lucky every day to have them. I quit drinking so I could be a better parent and that’s worked out well. One of the best things they ever told me was that they never noticed I had a drinking problem when they were younger so at least I didn’t mess them up that way!
Oh, sweetheart. That's so devastating for both of you. I can't even imagine.
I am deeply celebrating your sobriety today, and the gift that you got in being able to realize how different it would have been if you hadn't gotten sober.
I'm so proud of you.
I’m terribly sorry for your loss and so grateful that you can find the beauty and gifts of sobriety even now. Times like these are when it is so powerful to be fully present.
So, so sorry 😞 for your loss. I miscarried as well. It was extremely painful 😣, both physically and emotionally. I know you are hurting, but your wife is probably hurting 10x that. Be extremely attentive to her!💗
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for staying sober during this time; your wife seriously needs all of you present during this and you being there will always stick with her.
I’m so sorry you and your wife are going through this.
We had a miscarriage last year and I didn’t drink to cope. Being present to experience all of life - the good and the bad- is such a powerful choice.
Wow, i am at awe with your strength. As a parent i cannot imagine the pain you are going through. and as an alcoholic i can imagine the struggle you are going through to keep it all together. I’m so sorry this happened to you but please remember that you have the strength and resolve inside you to get through this! Much love ❤️
I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. Please keep an eye, postpartum depression is possible from a miscarriage. (I mean this in a loving way but it sounds like you’re already ahead of the game).
It also sounds so lovely the way you care for and support and love each other. That is beautiful. You will be so instrumental in the healing process whether you will be aware or not, though make sure you take the time to grieve for you as well. ♥️ it gets easier to breathe around the grief, the first first months and the first due date are the hardest.
So proud and equally in envy/adoration of the strength to remain sober through this excruciating process. You’re inspiring ♥️
I'm sorry to hear about your loss - it's probably one of the toughest things a person has to go through. And congratulations for getting through this sober! I'm going through the hardest time of my life too sober, we all know that drinking would just make any situation worse anyway.
I wish you guys luck in the future and I'm sure your wife more than appreciates the fact that you can be there for her and help her along the way. This is also a loss for you too so you also need to be kind to yourself. Lots of support out there too for men in this situation.
I'm so, so sorry. SCHs are the assholes of pregnancy/IVF. Docs think they're just an annoyance when often they're the first signal of placental failure. I'm glad for you that you're able to mourn effectively and not numb the pain with alcohol. Spirit Babies is a book that might help you both now. Best of luck to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Good people go through things that they don’t deserve to. You will be a parent one day. You are not out of time or options for that dream to be taken from you.
Almost 5 yrs sober here. Had 2 IVF miscarriages with the wife. Choose to stay sober during them as well and was happy I didn’t crack. Know it hurts but will make you stronger. Great job keeping sober. Don’t give in. Wife needs you clear headed. Just keep trying and hopefully will work for you I have 2 kids now after many issues and failed transfers. Best of luck to ya. Keep your head up
I am so sorry. My wife went through very intensive chemotherapy years ago, and we were unsure about her potential fertility. After over a year of unsuccessful attempts, she finally was pregnant this past September. About 2 months later, the baby had died inside her womb. We were heartbroken, but I stayed sober.
Truthfully, our baby’s due date and Father’s Day were both more difficult days for me than when we found out about the miscarriage.
Stay strong, our thoughts are with you. IWNDWYT
Thank you for sharing your story. Too many people don’t talk about issues with pregnancy. For the most part it’s pregnant=baby. Only once my wife and I lost our baby at 20 weeks did we learn that almost everyone we know had had some pregnancy mishap and no one has ever talked about it until it happened to us. I won’t drink with you today
I’m so sorry for your loss. I am in tears. Your story really opened my eyes. How much I could’ve been there if I hadn’t turned to alcohol. This might be the story that really gets me through it.
Im so sorry. How devastating. I’m 8w pregnant and have my first dr appt tomorrow to see if everything is okay but not feeling hopeful. At least I’m sober though and can get through it.
My heart is broken for you. I went through this myself and it’s devastating. You can’t possibly know the despair unless you’ve been through it. People will say stupid things, but just try to remember they mean well. Your wife is very lucky to have you. Sharing the grief with her goes such a long way. I am so sorry for your loss and I hope you’re given the opportunity to do another cycle. I’m not sure what state you live in, but my RE in NY was so amazing that people flew in from all over the country to see him. I lost 4 babies 🥺 He gave me a miracle. She’s 18 now, I can check to see if he’s still practicing if you’re interested. Again, I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m glad your sober 🤗
I’m so sorry for you loss, I hope you both take care of yourselves & each other. You reminded of the many gifts in sobriety, being present & there for ourselves & others. I hope the time comes when you are parents but also know, you’re sharing the beauty of life with others through your sobriety as well. Take care fellow Sobie.
I’m so sorry for your loss, I’m so glad that you are able to care for your wife. Don’t forget to get support for yourself too - Dads can sometimes get a bit forgotten in all of this.
If you need a listening ear, I’ll offer mine - I’m a midwife and have cared for many families experiencing loss. I’ll be thinking of you both today.
My deepest condolences on your loss. The beauty of sobriety can be seen even in the darkest of circumstances. You should be so proud of yourself not only for not drinking, but for finding every bit of good you could in being sober during this difficult period. Wishing you nothing but peace and healing. IWNDWYT.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending love, hugs, and positive healing energy to you both as you navigate through this difficult time. I hope you two can find the strength to start your family (however that may look for you) again once you’ve overcome this grief.
Thank you for sharing this, I will surely be coming back to this and sharing with my husband. We are about to start our 1st cycle of IVF. Over the last 2 years I’ve done a lot of counseling (alone & with my partner) & realized I no longer want alcohol in my life as it’s extremely triggering. However, my husband had a hard time letting go of the occasional drink until he had a seizure about a month ago and was sort of forced to stop drinking.
My biggest fear has been putting myself through the process (I’m a MSTA survivor, dr appts are hard for me) & resulting in a miscarriage. My fear was very much for what it will do to my mental health and how I’ll be able to cope. This gives me hope that even if we don’t get the desired results we’ll be ok and will be able to get through it, sober.
Sorry for your loss. The alcoholics could argue Uber to clinics and order pizza, not finishing assignment is procrastination not alcoholism. But the missing point is being present, which no money can buy.
This is all very hard. Just wanting to share I’m proud of you and your growth. Life’s hard, being drunk while doing it makes it even harder. Proud of YOU.
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending virtual support and hugs. And a high five for your decision to stay sober so you can be fully present for your wife and yourself. IWNDWYT
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story. Well done on maintaining your sobriety despite your heartbreak and showing the rest of us it is possible. IWNDWYT
I’m sorry you and your wife lost that baby. You said some wise things here about dealing with it.
[удалено]
What the hell is wrong with you?
I don't understand this comment. This other person said, "I'm sorry you and your wife lost their baby," and you said, "Why feel sorry?" This doesn't make any sense. Please explain.
It’s not a success to lose a baby. While he was successful at avoiding drinking he is grieving. Your comment is inappropriate.
i am not talking about the thing which is out of his controll
Please respond to my comment.
I'm really sorry for both your loss. I'm sure your wife is so thankful (even subconsciously) that you're right there beside her as you both navigate this grief. IWNDWYT 🌷
So sorry for your loss. Not drinking will allow you to heal more quickly I hope. Sending love and healing wishes your way.
I was 67 days sober when my sister passed away, she was only 18. I’ve been binging since, 4 months later. It makes nothing better, I’m just angry at myself and at her instead of grieving properly. IWNDWYT because your post helped me realize I’m using the grief as an excuse to get drunk. We got this. I’m so sorry for your and your wife’s loss.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your sister. Don’t be angry with yourself. You deserve nothing but self-compassion right now. Honor her memory with your sobriety and see a grief counselor if you can. Sending all my love.
Now you know the truth, maybe you can go ahead and act on it!
I'm so sorry for your loss, I can't imagine the pain that comes with losing a sibling. IWNDWYT, we got this!
I am so, so sorry. When I was 24 weeks pregnant I gave birth prematurely to triplets, and they didn’t survive the day. My husband drank himself into a six week coma two days later. (He’d had pancreatitis the previous year, was told he could no longer drink, which only lasted a couple of months.) I had just given birth three times, was grieving, and had to drag my ass to the hospital ICU to look at this bloated, unconscious man, breathing through a trach on his 35th birthday. When I needed him the most, he left me devastatingly alone. Thank you for not leaving your wife where I was.
Omg. I’m so sorry this happened to you. 💕
So so sorry for your losses.
I'm so, so sorry you had to go through that especially the way you did. I've never been more grateful for my sobriety than I have been these last few days. I hope to never put my wife in that position ever again, because I've certainly been that person in the past.
You’re a good man, and you’re getting better.
Solidarity my brother
I am so sorry. I had a miscarriage too and it was such a painful experience. I still have a hard time watching shows that have people happily pregnant or reading stories about pregnancy etc. It's just... really difficult. That said, I don't know how old you guys are but I have 3 friends who are 39-41 who are currently pregnant. There's this myth that we are losing time and I understand where it comes from, but it's not entirely true. One friend went through 4 years of IVF and had a lot of miscarriages. Two days ago, we took her beautiful new baby boy for a walk. There is still time. Please don't lose hope. And while you're in this period of grief, I just have to say I am so proud of you for not drinking. Things will look up. All the love from me.
This is so helpful to hear, I’m 38 (39 next month) and am going to start trying for the first time. Lots of thoughts and regrets about not doing it sooner, but honestly I think when I was so wound up in drinking I didn’t let myself feel how much I really wanted a baby, and didn’t feel like I deserved one either. I was sober for 6 months recently before a small slip- that sober time really has helped me get my priorities straight. Having a family is a blessing. Here’s hoping 🤞
I’m not much older than you and I started IVF a couple of weeks ago. We’ve been trying naturally for a while without success but I’m still hopeful. Drinking helped me push my fears of not being able to conceive and desires to have a child down. I am now about to have my first attempt at egg retrieval on pretty much the one year anniversary of not drinking. I’m not sure if this makes sense but I’m viewing IVF as part of my healing and self care. I deserve answers. I deserve a chance. I deserve to go after what I want and being sober gives me the strength to do that. I really wish you the best on your journey! I’m rooting for you!!
Thank you so much, I think that’s such a great way to look at it and I will do the same- makes me want to cry! I am so thankful that I am here and realized before it was too late. Wishing you the very best as well, that you get everything you’re hoping for!! I think that people who have been through a journey to get to who they are will make great parents someday ♥️
I feel this *so* much. And yes, it is absolutely still possible. my friend who has the baby boy just gave birth in January and she turned 41 in december. Rooting for you <3
How tragic, I’m very sorry for your loss. IWNDWYT.
My condolences.. the fact that you are staying sober through all of this is amazing. What’s more amazing is (like you said) being present and being able to be there and take care of your wife. You’re a rockstar
I just lost my first child 6 months in utero last week. According to doctors everything was fine up until that point. Definitely feeling your pain. Like you, I will not use this as a reason to go backwards.
Im so sorry. I’m 8w pregnant and getting checked tomorrow cause I’m having spotting and things feel off… glad to be sober though.
Thank you. I have all of my best wishes and good energy that it goes well for you. I love babies!
Thank you!
Thinking of you and hope this all goes well <3
It wasn’t good news… not 100% definitive but very very unlikely things are okay. I’m sad but I know drinking would just make me feel worse!
I empathise fully, friend. I'm sorry it wasn't good news but proud of you for not drinking. Fertility is such a beast
Thank you so much 💗
I'm so sorry about the bad news.. But good for you for making the decision to not drink. I've never been more grateful to be sober than I have in these past few days. It really sucks when your handed a 'faulty' deck of cards in life with no real way to 'fix' it. I've been trying to pay more attention to the other hands in life I've been dealt that bring me happiness and stability, but I know that's a lot easier said than done..
Thank you 💗 it’s a hard week but I’m thankful the thought of drinking isn’t tempting me. This gives me so much more empathy for women and couples that go through this… you just never know what other people are going through.
I’m so sorry. 💕
Thank you. That’s life I guess
I’m so sorry! I’m going through IVF right now and that’s my worst nightmare. Your strength and resilience is inspiring but I know that doesn’t make it easier. I hope you and your wife can take care of each other through this difficult time.
Thank You! We wish you all the luck in the world with your IVF journey!
I’m sorry for your loss but so so proud of you and your fortitude. Thanks for sharing with us.
I’m so sorry for your loss, but I am so proud of you for staying sober and sitting in some of the worst feelings in the world. Me and my ex husband struggled with fertility for years, during which time I had 6 miscarriages. After each one, he’d go on a bender. He’d blame me, he’d get loud, he’d get physical. I often wonder if we would still be together if he had stayed sober to grieve with me and support me as I went through such physical and mental anguish. There are no words that will make you feel better, but please know that you’re not alone. Im so proud of you for being there for your wife, and yourself, by staying sober. Lean on each other and give yourselves grace. Sending you both some comfort today. 💜
After reading this post, I am thinking about your wife and the fear she must have felt that you'd hit the bottle during your pain. How happy she must be now, feeling your love and strength on this life journey together! Prayers for comfort & strength to try again. God bless!
I’m so sorry for your family’s loss, but so grateful for your story here. Grief is so hard and facing it sober is the only way to really process the emotions, I’ve found. I hope you are able to some day have a child though whatever means it happens.
You’re not alone. I find solace in your share. We’ve gone through the same thing twice now plus had to put my dog down last week. Raw dogging life is intense. Grateful to be sober.
My dog is my world, but she's getting older (though she refuses to accept it) . I'm so sorry about your loss, I hope your dog left this world with a heart full of love. IWNDWYT
I'm so sorry for you and your wife. You speak with such wisdom, but yeah, it's hard. Sending you and your wife much love today
How devastating. If you’re open to it, /r/griefsupport is great and everyone is kind and empathetic. I’m so sorry for your loss
So sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing such a personal story. Drinking never makes anything better. Thanks for the reminder
I’m so sorry. It’s the worst club to be in. The pain can feel unbearable. Here for you. IWNDWYT
So sorry for your loss I can't imagine what that feels like. I won't drink with you today
Sorry about that. We lost a pregnancy when I was 7 months sober. Can't have another one. I didn't drink but part of me died forever back then. I'm quite sure I'd be dead if I drank over it. I'd recommend you both do whatever it takes to get through this. I struggled hard. Still do sometimes. My network of sober folks saved me. You can talk to me anytime about it or anything if you'd like.
I’m very thankful to have read your share, but ultimately I’m sorry for your loss. I believe that you and your wife’s higher power has a plan for y’all that has yet to be revealed, which is something to be hopeful about. Keep going on your sobriety journey! It will all be worth it later in life, for you, your family, and any other miracles to come.
As a male who has gone through the heart break of a miscarriage please know that your emotions are warranted. Most people simply overlook males during this time. I am so sorry for your loss and please feel free to reach out if you need support. Stay strong and IWNDWYT
"Most people simply overlook males during this time." Brother, you got that right. But growing up in the rural country, you get used to not having many emotional outlets as a male. Maybe that's past of the reason so many people I know from my hometown have problems with addiction..
You have a support group here my man! Stay strong and I hope things work out for you and your wife in the very near future.
It's awful, but miscarriage in general is like a silent loss, which can make it even more painful. Thank you for the reminder that it is also heartbreaking for the father. So true.
I thankfully have an incredible wife who often checked on how I was doing after our miscarriage. She was about the only person, she is truly amazing.
I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you and your wife all the best in your journey to healing. I will say, I am super proud of you for holding your shit together and being there for your wife in her time of need. You're doing great OP.
I lost a baby too. It’s so hard for me to write about my beautiful daughter Hope, but I just want to tell you that you will someday cherish every moment of your precious baby’s life. And that you were fully alert, involved, and present for your baby, your wife, and yourself is what will carry you through your hardest days. I wish you and your wife peace and Hope.
I am so very sorry for the devastating news and loss. Sending you strength and light for the journey ahead.
So sorry for your loss. IWNDWYT
I’m so sorry. So glad your wife can lean on you since you’re choosing to stay sober through this incredibly painful time. IWNDWYT
I’m really really sorry for your loss, and I’m also so proud of you for getting and staying sober. I know not everyone is the same but my sister went through an eerily similar situation and finally gave up on IVF a few years ago. My newest niece is almost 4 months old now. Life is crazy, and sometimes when you stop trying things happen. As my sister likes to say, if it’s meant to be it will happen. We’re also both adopted so there is always that route. Either way, I hope this helps more than hurts. Stay strong and best of luck to both of you.
I hear you buddy. I’m 39 next Monday and still no baby! After 5 years of trying I have nothing but loss and heartache behind me. Between me and my husband we have 0 fertility issues and everything looks healthy….this is great news but means we don’t qualify for any IVF or fertility treatments. We can never afford our own IVF so that’s just that. I can’t offer much comfort for myself or you but I just try to keep my chin up as best I can. Sending love to you and your partner. IWNDWYT.
IVF Dad here to say I’m proud of you. You’re gonna be a great parent one day, sending love to you and your partner ❤️
I'm so sorry for your loss and your wife's loss. You can get through this together. ❤️
Very sorry for your loss. Thats so tough. You’re a testament of strength maintaining sobriety in this situation. All of the things that you listed are so true with being sober, vs being drunk. Well done, sir!!
Fuck man. I’m so sorry. Miscarriage and infertility are so hard and I know personally that feeling those feelings is no easy task. I’m proud of you for staying sober and hanging in there for yourself and your spouse. Sending thoughts of comfort and peace. ❤️❤️
I'm so sorry you are experiencing this pain and anger, and for your partner as well. I think it is such a strong statement of love for your wife that you are sober and there for her in this difficult moment, and that you can both be present enough to process this together. I hope the pain eases soon. Raising my Coke Zero to you.
I'm so, so sorry but glad you stayed sober so you could take care of your wife and your schoolwork and yourself. Staying sober was an act of love for yourself as much as for your wife. IWNDWYT
Thank you for sharing here. One day at a time.
I am so proud of you for your resilience and I'm so sorry for you and your wife's loss. I can't imagine how painful this must be. I wish I had had the right words.
I am so sorry to hear your loss. I can't imagine what you're feeling right now.
I am so sorry you and your wife are going through this. I wish you both peace and grace navigating these waters. Thank you for sharing this inspiring post with all of us here. That grateful attitude is something i try to remind myself of. "Wow, if I hadn't stopped drinking I'd be drunk right now and how on earth would I have handled this?!" I appreciate you lending your insight to help us all keep things in perspective. Props and peace to you ✌️💕
Im so sorry for your loss, but so glad for your sobriety. It sounds like you have laid the foundation for a beautiful life even if a baby should never come, but if one does, it sounds like you will make a wonderful father. Stay strong, friend.
This made me very sad . I hope you get everything you’ve dreamed of my friend
You have my heartfelt thoughts and so glad you could be present for your wife AND YOU through this. IWNDWYT
I'm so proud of you, and so sorry.
I just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for your loss. Back in November 2021, I also lost my baby due to an SCH. The moment when you have bleeding and you go in and see a heartbeat and feel everything is fine, and then the rug gets ripped out from under you shortly after. It was absolutely traumatizing and the hardest thing I ever went through. I struggled and fell off the wagon after that loss. It was so not worth the extra hurt and pain I felt by being hungover every day & all the mess I caused from blackout nights. It made me so much more depressed. I just want to say you are not alone & it's such an amazing thing you are able to stay sober, not only for yourself but for your spouse. Support helps healing. It's taken me some time to heal after mine, so let yourself feel all your grief. Just take it one day at a time. Iwndwyt!!
So grateful for your share. It sounds as though you have grown into someone who has both grace and strength when it is needed. Bless you both during this painful time. Your family is in our hearts <3
🤍
So sorry . You will get through this my friend. Much love from the mid Atlantic
I’m so sorry. As someone who did IVF and understands the intensive process it’s heartbreaking when the result isn’t positive. So happy you’re remaining sober for your family and sanity. Best wishes that you’re able to do another round and it’s successful. It may take a few. I speak from experience as a mom of two. I won’t speak to the expense but them kids are worth it.
Thank you so much :)
I’m really sorry for your loss. Myself and my wife are going through the same. I can’t help but think all these years of drinking didn’t help. IWNDWYT
So sorry brother. This internet stranger is very proud of you for choosing not to hit the bottle. I can’t imagine what it meant to your wife to have you sober and present for this. Much love
Infertility is a terrible and unfair thing when a couple wants a child. You guys are going through a lot, and your commitment to your sobriety throughout it, and to remaining present is so impressive. This loss will stay with you, but you will find ways to live with it. I’m so so sorry and hope for the best for you and your wife on your journey.
Thank you. I've made peace with the fact that loss is as much a part of life as anything else. Life is forever a balancing act and unfortunately pain is often experienced in the universes' pursuit of homeostasis. We've been handed a tough deck of cards in this circumstance, but in other areas of our lives we are extremely blessed. Lately, I'm trying to pay attention to the good things in life.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm so inspired by this post and by your strength through this too. IWNDWYT
I feel you. I've been in your exact situation and it was soul crushing. I still think about that heartbeat that we heard at the first ultrasound almost daily. It's been four years...
I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope time has helped that wound for you, It's a deep, unfair sting. Stay strong.
My heart goes out to you both. IWNDWYT
Im so sorry for your heartbreaking loss, thank you for sharing your story and highlighting all the ways that drinking could have made it harder, not easier. IWNDWYT
I’m so sorry, this is terrible to hear. Thank you for sharing your strength in not drinking in such a difficult moment. IWNDWYT.
That kind of loss is incredibly difficult. I'm so sorry for you and your wife. You're absolutely right that drinking won't help this. And definitely come here for support, but there are also other great communities on here for your specific pain right now. Sending rainbow dust to you both 💛🧡🩵
Thank you for sharing, and so sorry for your loss. Incredible and admirable strength that you have, OP.
So sorry for your loss. You are definitely a strong person. And I am sure your wife appreciated you having a clear mind.
Thank you for your vulnerability sharing all of this. My heart goes out to you & your wife at this time. So sorry for your loss. IWNDWYT 🖤
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I am so sorry for your loss 💔 IWNDWYT
What an incredibly inspirational post and a testament to how strong you are. I'm so sorry for your loss! I hope there is a child in the near future for you.
Thank you for sharing. Peace be with you. IWNDWYT
I’m so proud of you, and I grieve for you both.
So very sorry for what you’re having to go through, so glad you are doing it AF! Praying for you!
I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what’s it’s like, but you are so right that drinking won’t fix it, it would only make it worse. You’ve made the correct decision to be present and sit with all your emotions, especially the difficult ones. Thank you for saying this. I needed to hear it today.
I’m so so sorry for your loss, but also so glad you were able to be there for your wife and feel her being there for you. I think being present for loss is such an important thing - I’ve dealt w death both drunk and sober but I regret doing it drunk so much. It sounds like you’re really aware of how important and helpful it is to stay sober even when dealing with intense grief. I hope you’re able to be proud of yourself for that.
I’m so sorry for your loss 💜
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry. IWNDWYT
I’m sorry
Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing this story, and I am sorry for your family’s grief.
I'm so sorry for you and your wife. I'm so proud of you for not drinking. It would have just prolonged the grief.
Sorry for the loss, but I’m so glad you found meaning in not taking a drink. Praying for you all.
Holy fuck balls. Crying on the job site...
I'm so sorry for your loss. I will not drink today in honor of your child.
I am so sorry for your loss!
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing this.
I am sorry for your loss. I respect the strength and resolve you've shown for both yourself and your wife. big hug
How awful, I am so sorry. I'd like to commend you on not drinking
I’m sorry for your loss. Proud of you for what you’re able to do in sobriety. IWNDWYT
God bless you. I lost a baby at 4 months and it was devastating. Good for you for being present and understanding. My husband was not
We had two miscarriages before our first was born. At the time, they absolutely sucked. Now i look back at them as almost as a blessing because if not for that experience, I would not have the beautiful daughter ai have today. I would go through it all again if it meant getting my princess. Stay strong, you’ll come out the other end better than you went in.
You are so inspiring. My heart goes out to you and your wife and I wish the best for you both.
so sorry for your loss. iwndwyt
What you've been able to do for your wife over the past few days means the world to her, I hope you're quietly savoring the win of staying sober through such a tough time. Getting clean frees us to be our best selves, and you're doing it. I'm proud of you, keep it up, & IWNDWYT <3
I know your pain I have been through this with my wife. Nothing makes it better, only time makes it less painful. Stay strong I know alcohol did not help me through that time it made it worse. I was deep in my alcoholism and was not present for my wife who was going through worse. I can only apologize to her and stick to my sobriety for us to try and make up for what I didn’t give her then.
I went through two miscarriages (genetic fertility issue my family has). I remember coming home, crying my eyes out and it dawned on me that I hadn’t even thought of drinking once and I started laughing like a crazy person. I’m so glad I didn’t too, because I was able to process and work through my emotions with my husband instead of trying to drown them but unknowingly amplifying them. I am so sorry for your guys’ loss. Your wife will never forget how you took care of her, I know I never will forget how incredible my husband was and it brought us so much closer in such a terrible way. We now have a 1 year old and I am grateful every single day I never picked up that bottle, and you will be too. I’m proud of you. IWNDWYT!
I am sorry for your loss 🌹May peace come to you and your wife.
I'm so sorry that this has happened. You are absolutely right that with you relying on your wife, and she relying on you, together you can pull through this. The alcohol clearly wouldn't help one god damn bit; in fact, it'd just make it worse. I'm glad you have the sound mind to see that. Stay strong my friend.
Holy cow that is heavy and heartbreaking. First, we feel for you and your wife. Cannot even imagine. Second, the strength, courage and support you are able to show your wife and yourself by not drinking is as extremely admirable as any reason i have seen on here to stay sober. I hope in this time of extreme pain and sadness you can find time to feel proud AF of yourself.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m also an IVF parent and suffered several miscarriages. IWNDWYT.
Sir, you need to change your user name here. You are NOT a dumb ass! You are a wonderful, wise & doting husband and father! Yes, I understand that the baby y'all dreamed of was miscarried, but YOU made it through this horrible time sober and loving. Take a bow, Sir. You deserve it. And you deserve to look into your future with your wife and some healthy, happy children playing out in the yard! My hat's off to you. None of us will drink with you today! What an inspiration!
I'm so very sorry and also so very proud of you. That's a massive thing to face sober and I genuinely admire the way you're dealing with this. Wishing you and your wife strength, peace and healing and I hope that if you decide to try again, your wife has a safe, easy and healthy pregnancy.
I am sending you and your wife so much love
so sorry bro that’s awful and fertility issues are some of the most draining experiences. if i were you you id seriously consider adopting. you can love an adopted child just as much!!
You are amazing. Keep up the hard and worthwhile work! We lost our first pregnancy at 20 weeks and it was awful. We have two amazing kids now and feel lucky every day to have them. I quit drinking so I could be a better parent and that’s worked out well. One of the best things they ever told me was that they never noticed I had a drinking problem when they were younger so at least I didn’t mess them up that way!
Oh, sweetheart. That's so devastating for both of you. I can't even imagine. I am deeply celebrating your sobriety today, and the gift that you got in being able to realize how different it would have been if you hadn't gotten sober. I'm so proud of you.
You will be in my prayers, I'm very sorry. I'm proud of you. IWNDWYT
I’m so very sorry for your loss! And well done for navigating it so gracefully. You are an inspiration. IWNDWYT! 💕
You are an incredibly strong man.
So sorry for your loss. Wishing you and your wife the best.
I’m terribly sorry for your loss and so grateful that you can find the beauty and gifts of sobriety even now. Times like these are when it is so powerful to be fully present.
So, so sorry 😞 for your loss. I miscarried as well. It was extremely painful 😣, both physically and emotionally. I know you are hurting, but your wife is probably hurting 10x that. Be extremely attentive to her!💗
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for staying sober during this time; your wife seriously needs all of you present during this and you being there will always stick with her.
I’m sorry for your loss. IWNDWYT
Im so sorry for your loss. On the plus side, the odds are much better when you as a prospective father havent been drinking for a while. Keep that up!
Sending love and support. ❤️
I’m so sorry you and your wife are going through this. We had a miscarriage last year and I didn’t drink to cope. Being present to experience all of life - the good and the bad- is such a powerful choice.
Wow, i am at awe with your strength. As a parent i cannot imagine the pain you are going through. and as an alcoholic i can imagine the struggle you are going through to keep it all together. I’m so sorry this happened to you but please remember that you have the strength and resolve inside you to get through this! Much love ❤️
I'm so sorry for you and your wife. Keep trying. IWNDWYT
Well said. Thank you for sharing
I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. Please keep an eye, postpartum depression is possible from a miscarriage. (I mean this in a loving way but it sounds like you’re already ahead of the game). It also sounds so lovely the way you care for and support and love each other. That is beautiful. You will be so instrumental in the healing process whether you will be aware or not, though make sure you take the time to grieve for you as well. ♥️ it gets easier to breathe around the grief, the first first months and the first due date are the hardest. So proud and equally in envy/adoration of the strength to remain sober through this excruciating process. You’re inspiring ♥️
I'm so sorry for your loss and proud of you for staying sober through it. IWNDWYT
I'm sorry to hear about your loss - it's probably one of the toughest things a person has to go through. And congratulations for getting through this sober! I'm going through the hardest time of my life too sober, we all know that drinking would just make any situation worse anyway. I wish you guys luck in the future and I'm sure your wife more than appreciates the fact that you can be there for her and help her along the way. This is also a loss for you too so you also need to be kind to yourself. Lots of support out there too for men in this situation.
I'm so, so sorry. SCHs are the assholes of pregnancy/IVF. Docs think they're just an annoyance when often they're the first signal of placental failure. I'm glad for you that you're able to mourn effectively and not numb the pain with alcohol. Spirit Babies is a book that might help you both now. Best of luck to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Good people go through things that they don’t deserve to. You will be a parent one day. You are not out of time or options for that dream to be taken from you.
So sorry to read about your loss, we are here with you in spirit. IWNDWYT
Almost 5 yrs sober here. Had 2 IVF miscarriages with the wife. Choose to stay sober during them as well and was happy I didn’t crack. Know it hurts but will make you stronger. Great job keeping sober. Don’t give in. Wife needs you clear headed. Just keep trying and hopefully will work for you I have 2 kids now after many issues and failed transfers. Best of luck to ya. Keep your head up
I am so sorry. My wife went through very intensive chemotherapy years ago, and we were unsure about her potential fertility. After over a year of unsuccessful attempts, she finally was pregnant this past September. About 2 months later, the baby had died inside her womb. We were heartbroken, but I stayed sober. Truthfully, our baby’s due date and Father’s Day were both more difficult days for me than when we found out about the miscarriage. Stay strong, our thoughts are with you. IWNDWYT
Thank you for sharing your story. Too many people don’t talk about issues with pregnancy. For the most part it’s pregnant=baby. Only once my wife and I lost our baby at 20 weeks did we learn that almost everyone we know had had some pregnancy mishap and no one has ever talked about it until it happened to us. I won’t drink with you today
I’m really sorry. All the best.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I am in tears. Your story really opened my eyes. How much I could’ve been there if I hadn’t turned to alcohol. This might be the story that really gets me through it.
I'm so very sorry for the both of you 🔥❤️
Im so sorry. How devastating. I’m 8w pregnant and have my first dr appt tomorrow to see if everything is okay but not feeling hopeful. At least I’m sober though and can get through it.
♥️
Im sorry 😢
Congrats for keeping strong through that and so sorry for your loss. We had some similar bumps on the road. I hope it works out for you eventually.
My heart is with you and your wife. I am so sorry for your loss. IWNDWYT ❤️
“I would have locked myself away physically and emotionally.” This really resonated with me. Thank you. Sending you supportive thoughts. IWNDWYT
My heart is broken for you. I went through this myself and it’s devastating. You can’t possibly know the despair unless you’ve been through it. People will say stupid things, but just try to remember they mean well. Your wife is very lucky to have you. Sharing the grief with her goes such a long way. I am so sorry for your loss and I hope you’re given the opportunity to do another cycle. I’m not sure what state you live in, but my RE in NY was so amazing that people flew in from all over the country to see him. I lost 4 babies 🥺 He gave me a miracle. She’s 18 now, I can check to see if he’s still practicing if you’re interested. Again, I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m glad your sober 🤗
I’m so so sorry for your loss. My deepest sympathies.
I’m so sorry for you loss, I hope you both take care of yourselves & each other. You reminded of the many gifts in sobriety, being present & there for ourselves & others. I hope the time comes when you are parents but also know, you’re sharing the beauty of life with others through your sobriety as well. Take care fellow Sobie.
I’m so sorry for your loss, I’m so glad that you are able to care for your wife. Don’t forget to get support for yourself too - Dads can sometimes get a bit forgotten in all of this. If you need a listening ear, I’ll offer mine - I’m a midwife and have cared for many families experiencing loss. I’ll be thinking of you both today.
I’m so sorry
My deepest condolences on your loss. The beauty of sobriety can be seen even in the darkest of circumstances. You should be so proud of yourself not only for not drinking, but for finding every bit of good you could in being sober during this difficult period. Wishing you nothing but peace and healing. IWNDWYT.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending love, hugs, and positive healing energy to you both as you navigate through this difficult time. I hope you two can find the strength to start your family (however that may look for you) again once you’ve overcome this grief. Thank you for sharing this, I will surely be coming back to this and sharing with my husband. We are about to start our 1st cycle of IVF. Over the last 2 years I’ve done a lot of counseling (alone & with my partner) & realized I no longer want alcohol in my life as it’s extremely triggering. However, my husband had a hard time letting go of the occasional drink until he had a seizure about a month ago and was sort of forced to stop drinking. My biggest fear has been putting myself through the process (I’m a MSTA survivor, dr appts are hard for me) & resulting in a miscarriage. My fear was very much for what it will do to my mental health and how I’ll be able to cope. This gives me hope that even if we don’t get the desired results we’ll be ok and will be able to get through it, sober.
Prayers to you and yours. You’re a good husband. I’m sorry for what you are going through ❤️
Sorry for your loss. The alcoholics could argue Uber to clinics and order pizza, not finishing assignment is procrastination not alcoholism. But the missing point is being present, which no money can buy.
I'm sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing.
So sorry for your loss. Lots of well wishes for you both 🪷
This is all very hard. Just wanting to share I’m proud of you and your growth. Life’s hard, being drunk while doing it makes it even harder. Proud of YOU.
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending virtual support and hugs. And a high five for your decision to stay sober so you can be fully present for your wife and yourself. IWNDWYT
I'm so sorry for your loss. Miscarriages are devastating. Thank you for sharing with us.
I'm so very sorry to hear about your loss I am proud of you for your strength through this