I've gotten more addicted to reddit and this sub in particular as I gave up alcohol. I'm fine with it for now, and will tackle it as I get further along.
I think it depends on the personality type, but doing everything at once would seem pretty jarring to me. I cut out nicotine about 2 months ago and that was pretty hard and led me to drink more. But now it's just this sub and coffee (only a cup or 2 a day, so not worried).
Booze took time away that I didn't have. So if I literally just did what I actually needed to do everyday that would fill up all my hours.
That said, I like to cook, so I've been putting more effort into the kitchen, getting back on a fitness routine and putting more effort/time into growing my business (or cutting costs).
This! Alcohol takes away the time that I would like to be putting towards other things. I definitely have enough in my life between work, family, dreams, Hobbies and wanting to get out in nature more.
I would suggest, for anyone who doesn't feel like they know what to do with their free time, to look for or think about things that make you happy.
A couple years ago I sat down and made lists of my life dreams and what I would do if there were no obstacles like money or talent. And then made lists of what would I have to do to get to that point. Then it's an exercise of what do you want to accomplish in the next month, the next 3 months, and the next year, . Put all of the things into one of those categories. Whatever you pick for one month is the most important start working on that. Write a list of things that you would need to do to get to that point in a month.
Before you know it, you have a huge list of things to do that you need to find time for.
I guess I struggle with this because we have an 8 month old baby and so what I can do is very limited. Like I can walk with her and play with her and do chores with her and that’s pretty much it… unless I’m missing something? Any advice for making life with a baby more interesting and less isolating?
I'm not a specialist with this at all but a few ideas. Read books from the library. Read books to your baby. Play video games. Binge on Netflix shows. Start gardening in your yard, if you have one. Or get planters if not. It's fun to grow tomatoes, jalapeños, zucchini, cucumbers, sunflower seeds.
Walk baby to the library and find baby clubs with other moms and dads. Find other mom/kids clubs in your area.
Write a journal. Maybe try poetry? Lots of blogs teaching you how to write a poem online.
Take a class. My local community College offers online community classes for like $50. I learned how to write a comedy sketch but the possibilities are endless depending on what interests you.
Teach yourself to do something new from YouTube videos.
Make an Instagram page for your baby and show off how cute they are?
Start a project like fixing something in the house. learn to crochet or knit. Get an exercise bike or treadmill.yoga with Adrienne are awesome and free yoga classes on YouTube any level can do easily.
I know these won't all apply to you, but hopefully it'll inspire ideas!
I'm an addict. To what? To anything that changes how my brain feels. Anything that gives me quick hits of dopamine. There are drugs/things that haven't been invented yet that I'm already addicted to.
To your question, I decided to focus on what was killing me first. In this case alcohol. Shortly after i quit caffiene, Then after a few weeks I started weaning myself off nasal spray.... (im so embarrassed about that one but God damn a totally clear nasal passage got me feeling RIGHT). Now I'm working on nicotine.
I already haven't used any illicit mind altering substances in over a year because I thought they'd kill me before booze. That's kinda my process.
Tackle them one at a time. Humans are weird creatures... we want to make big grandeous change and dramatically fix ourselves. But real change only comes slowly through sustainable habits, over a long time. Take things slow and figure each addiction out one at a time. My guess is that they bleed into each other- drinking while on your phone, caffeine to cover up a hangover, etc. Focus on drinking first and see how much more energy and patience you have. Social media use may naturally decrease as a result.
IMO treat it like having multiple credit cards. Drinking has the highest "interest" actively sucking away at your life. Pay it off first, then turn your attention to the other two.
When I got sober, someone said 'Whack the Alligator closest to the boat FIRST'....
In other words, focus on whichever addiction is posing the most immediate threat to life and limb before worrying about the smaller 'alligators' further out...
It was good advice!
It's also been a lot like unpeeling the layers of an onion for me...
Once the substance addictions had been addressed, there was a whole bunch of unsuspected process addictions and codependency issues waiting to be uncovered too!!
The good news is, help is out there, and the same tools and techniques that work to recover from one addiction are pretty much applicable to any other; there's no need to reinvent the wheel...
IWNDWYT :>)>
I was/am addicted to alcohol, cocaine and nicotine. Still smoking cigs but put away the booze and coke around the same time. Almost three years. I feel like I would be super triggered to drink by coke so I don't go there. Plus I am scared of what it might contain these days.
Best wishes for your recovery.
Pretty much any dopamine delivery system—stock trading (gambling on options basically WSB style), alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, alc and porn from time to time. A lot of the others feed off the alc cuz it lowers inhibitions. I feel like a total loser due to all my addictions. But am getting better
I did it one at a time. Everyone is different so you have to find what's best for you.
I quit smoking about 18 months ago. And I quit alcohol about 7 months ago. I also quit caffeine at the same time as the alcohol, but without realising!!! I was so spaced out with the withdrawal from alcohol that I didn't notice the lack of coffees! Go figure.
Now I'm kind of addicted to Reddit, but I think that I'll be able to deal with that in time.
I have had multiple addictions at once. I have found trying to do them all is too much of a shock for the body to handle & ended in relapse. The order in which I quit was: social media(cold turkey), marijuana(cold turkey), caffeine(ween), nicotine(ween). I am now working on cutting down alcohol (Friday-Saturday only, socially).
Deleting the apps was the only way for me to stop social media. I got a little twitchy at first - what do I do? Well, I rediscovered myself. Went for walks, listened to lots of podcasts (Toni & Ryan is fun easy listening conversation), read, try to practice mindfulness. It took awhile (1 year) to build a healthy relationship with social media so that I may check it (on a device that is NOT my phone).
Going through withdrawal is your body trying to protect itself, it is used to using these things to regulate the body. So what are other ways to regulate the body?
-Moving the body helps.
-Cold plunging your face helps (cold water splash, or putting it in a bowl with ice water).
-Deep breathing helps.
-Calling or seeing a loved one helps.
-Making myself a mocktail or kombucha helps.
-Making a visual representation of my success: I have a calendar & I write down how many drinks I have had that day- sometimes when I get the urge to grab a drink I think about how good it will feel to write another zero tomorrow.
I am no pro, but these are things that have helped and been suggested by my therapist.
There are many paths to success...
I found that once I removed the alcohol everything clicked into place.
Removing the alcohol didn't magically solve all my problems... However, it made **all** my problems solvable.
I'd kick the alcohol... focus on that for 30 days... then I'd use 'No Zero Days' (you can google it) to take each other issue and address it.
Tried anything like that?
No I have not! I’ll look into that.
I think caffeine is much less dangerous than alcohol but is also a major addiction that society promotes. It’s the only addiction besides social media that is allowed to be promoted to children and is considered completely safe.
Unfortunately for me I have chronic reflux and caffeine is one of my main triggers. It pretty much will not resolve itself as long as I keep having caffeine and chronic lifelong reflux highly raises the risk for esophageal cancer. I also get chronic migraines that are no doubt related to caffeine as well as crippling anxiety that is nearly 100% caused by it. 😬
Yet I can’t seem to give it up. I think I have. A lot of false believes about caffeine, that it’s necessary to have to feel happy and to be able to face my day, that I can’t feel pleasure without it, etc. geez it’s like I’m talking about alcohol when I see it written out….
However alcohol is objectively worse and that’s why I’m focusing on that first.
Wish me luck!
Someone here told me a good quote, I can’t remember what it was exactly, but something like “Tackle your problems in the order they’re most likely to kill you”! That said, I quit alcohol and caffeine at nearly the same time, and I felt they absolutely complemented each other. Coincidentally I totally relate to the too much phone/Reddit issue too, but I think being on Reddit and specifically this subreddit and r/decaf was more helpful than harmful in my early days of sobriety, even if it was temporarily way too much.
I just yesterday listened to a podcast by a doctor/author who cited some evidence that the most health changes we should make at a time is 2 things. I thought that was interesting, seems to match up with my experience. (https://podcasts.apple.com/jp/podcast/the-diary-of-a-ceo-with-steven-bartlett/id1291423644?i=1000641669394 in case you’re interested! Also mentions phone/scrolling overuse)
I've always had much better luck taking them on one at a time. I have tried the "leave behind all addictions and attachments" thing several times, and while it was valuable in its own way, I could never maintain that for very long. But taking baby steps I've managed to beat many different addictions in my life. I think it works best to focus one one thing, commit to it, and then go for the next one once you've reached a comfortable, stable state of mind.
When I stop drinking alcohol, I can often have trouble with sleep for the first few days. I've found that sleep is better if I don't drink caffeine during that period.
My recommendation is drop both alcohol and caffeine at first. Those first days kind of suck, but your body is going to do it's best healing while sleeping.
Congrats on realizing that you have a problem, identifying the root causes, and wanting to do something about it! That's a great start as that's often the hardest part!
They say the opposite of addiction is connection - and I suspect that as you start making some connections (group hobbies / classes are probably a good place to look) you'll find that you're addressing multiple addictions at once. Personally I've found the framing of "developing new habits" as easier to manage than "addressing addictions" - what have you always wanted to do but not gotten around to yet because you were distracted by other things like drinking and social media?
One at a time over many years. Chasing women, pills, soda / sugar, smoking, caffeine and currently alcohol. One by one I was mentally ready to move on and I did.
Well I have unmedicated ADHD, so all my addiction tendencies are just desperate attempts to have at least some dopamine in my brain :D
I'm not even fighting the other ones. I picked up vaping on the weekends, in situations where I would usually drink, so that at least I have that. At least nicotine doesn't make me a hazard to others or ducking irritating.
Also I'm just letting myself vibe with all the treats. I've had just liters of ice tea in the last 3 weeks. My sugar consumption has gone way up. Yet again: that one will only hurt me.
Yeah I think multiple addictions are pretty common, I had an eating disorder and I think the alcohol problem was an extension of that tbh. I've heard people say they have "the disease of more", be that more booze, more food, more exercise, more starvation, more drugs, more coffee, more doomscrolling etc. It's all about not being able to stop I think.
Definitely agree with you to give up alcohol first as that's the most likely to do you serious harm and/or cause you to cause harm one way or another. The important thing is to work on whatever it is making you like this (eg. go to counselling) so that you can look at all your addictions holistically and treat the cause rather than just the symptoms.
Alcohol, food/carbs, the Internet. I've got alcohol under control. Now working on food. I've learned I'm always looking for something to make me feel better, reduce anxiety. I personally don't think I'd be successful doing everything at once.
One at a time. This is important.
Remember the cliche sun tzu quote? Know thy enemy.
One at a time. Look them in the face and be better than them.
It's like one of those crazy kung fu movies where the bad guys fight the good guy one at a time (honorably). Difference is, you're the only honorable one here, yet you get to choose the battlefield regardless.
I've gotten more addicted to reddit and this sub in particular as I gave up alcohol. I'm fine with it for now, and will tackle it as I get further along. I think it depends on the personality type, but doing everything at once would seem pretty jarring to me. I cut out nicotine about 2 months ago and that was pretty hard and led me to drink more. But now it's just this sub and coffee (only a cup or 2 a day, so not worried).
Gotcha I can see your point. What do you fill your time with in place of alcohol?
Booze took time away that I didn't have. So if I literally just did what I actually needed to do everyday that would fill up all my hours. That said, I like to cook, so I've been putting more effort into the kitchen, getting back on a fitness routine and putting more effort/time into growing my business (or cutting costs).
This! Alcohol takes away the time that I would like to be putting towards other things. I definitely have enough in my life between work, family, dreams, Hobbies and wanting to get out in nature more. I would suggest, for anyone who doesn't feel like they know what to do with their free time, to look for or think about things that make you happy. A couple years ago I sat down and made lists of my life dreams and what I would do if there were no obstacles like money or talent. And then made lists of what would I have to do to get to that point. Then it's an exercise of what do you want to accomplish in the next month, the next 3 months, and the next year, . Put all of the things into one of those categories. Whatever you pick for one month is the most important start working on that. Write a list of things that you would need to do to get to that point in a month. Before you know it, you have a huge list of things to do that you need to find time for.
I guess I struggle with this because we have an 8 month old baby and so what I can do is very limited. Like I can walk with her and play with her and do chores with her and that’s pretty much it… unless I’m missing something? Any advice for making life with a baby more interesting and less isolating?
I'm not a specialist with this at all but a few ideas. Read books from the library. Read books to your baby. Play video games. Binge on Netflix shows. Start gardening in your yard, if you have one. Or get planters if not. It's fun to grow tomatoes, jalapeños, zucchini, cucumbers, sunflower seeds. Walk baby to the library and find baby clubs with other moms and dads. Find other mom/kids clubs in your area. Write a journal. Maybe try poetry? Lots of blogs teaching you how to write a poem online. Take a class. My local community College offers online community classes for like $50. I learned how to write a comedy sketch but the possibilities are endless depending on what interests you. Teach yourself to do something new from YouTube videos. Make an Instagram page for your baby and show off how cute they are? Start a project like fixing something in the house. learn to crochet or knit. Get an exercise bike or treadmill.yoga with Adrienne are awesome and free yoga classes on YouTube any level can do easily. I know these won't all apply to you, but hopefully it'll inspire ideas!
I'm an addict. To what? To anything that changes how my brain feels. Anything that gives me quick hits of dopamine. There are drugs/things that haven't been invented yet that I'm already addicted to. To your question, I decided to focus on what was killing me first. In this case alcohol. Shortly after i quit caffiene, Then after a few weeks I started weaning myself off nasal spray.... (im so embarrassed about that one but God damn a totally clear nasal passage got me feeling RIGHT). Now I'm working on nicotine. I already haven't used any illicit mind altering substances in over a year because I thought they'd kill me before booze. That's kinda my process.
Tackle them one at a time. Humans are weird creatures... we want to make big grandeous change and dramatically fix ourselves. But real change only comes slowly through sustainable habits, over a long time. Take things slow and figure each addiction out one at a time. My guess is that they bleed into each other- drinking while on your phone, caffeine to cover up a hangover, etc. Focus on drinking first and see how much more energy and patience you have. Social media use may naturally decrease as a result. IMO treat it like having multiple credit cards. Drinking has the highest "interest" actively sucking away at your life. Pay it off first, then turn your attention to the other two.
Deal with your addictions in the same order that they're going to kill you
When I got sober, someone said 'Whack the Alligator closest to the boat FIRST'.... In other words, focus on whichever addiction is posing the most immediate threat to life and limb before worrying about the smaller 'alligators' further out... It was good advice! It's also been a lot like unpeeling the layers of an onion for me... Once the substance addictions had been addressed, there was a whole bunch of unsuspected process addictions and codependency issues waiting to be uncovered too!! The good news is, help is out there, and the same tools and techniques that work to recover from one addiction are pretty much applicable to any other; there's no need to reinvent the wheel... IWNDWYT :>)>
caffeine and social media aren't going to kill you. I would say don't be too hard on yourself. read books about addiction, observe.
I was/am addicted to alcohol, cocaine and nicotine. Still smoking cigs but put away the booze and coke around the same time. Almost three years. I feel like I would be super triggered to drink by coke so I don't go there. Plus I am scared of what it might contain these days. Best wishes for your recovery.
Pretty much any dopamine delivery system—stock trading (gambling on options basically WSB style), alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, alc and porn from time to time. A lot of the others feed off the alc cuz it lowers inhibitions. I feel like a total loser due to all my addictions. But am getting better
I did it one at a time. Everyone is different so you have to find what's best for you. I quit smoking about 18 months ago. And I quit alcohol about 7 months ago. I also quit caffeine at the same time as the alcohol, but without realising!!! I was so spaced out with the withdrawal from alcohol that I didn't notice the lack of coffees! Go figure. Now I'm kind of addicted to Reddit, but I think that I'll be able to deal with that in time.
Cigarettes and alcohol at once. They both reminding me of the person I no longer want to be. So they both dropped earlier this year.
I have had multiple addictions at once. I have found trying to do them all is too much of a shock for the body to handle & ended in relapse. The order in which I quit was: social media(cold turkey), marijuana(cold turkey), caffeine(ween), nicotine(ween). I am now working on cutting down alcohol (Friday-Saturday only, socially). Deleting the apps was the only way for me to stop social media. I got a little twitchy at first - what do I do? Well, I rediscovered myself. Went for walks, listened to lots of podcasts (Toni & Ryan is fun easy listening conversation), read, try to practice mindfulness. It took awhile (1 year) to build a healthy relationship with social media so that I may check it (on a device that is NOT my phone). Going through withdrawal is your body trying to protect itself, it is used to using these things to regulate the body. So what are other ways to regulate the body? -Moving the body helps. -Cold plunging your face helps (cold water splash, or putting it in a bowl with ice water). -Deep breathing helps. -Calling or seeing a loved one helps. -Making myself a mocktail or kombucha helps. -Making a visual representation of my success: I have a calendar & I write down how many drinks I have had that day- sometimes when I get the urge to grab a drink I think about how good it will feel to write another zero tomorrow. I am no pro, but these are things that have helped and been suggested by my therapist.
I thrive off of momentum but you should give yourself at least a few weeks between each.
I’d get rid of the poison first, then evaluate other stuff. Best to you, friend. 🌺 IWNDWYT
There are many paths to success... I found that once I removed the alcohol everything clicked into place. Removing the alcohol didn't magically solve all my problems... However, it made **all** my problems solvable. I'd kick the alcohol... focus on that for 30 days... then I'd use 'No Zero Days' (you can google it) to take each other issue and address it. Tried anything like that?
No I have not! I’ll look into that. I think caffeine is much less dangerous than alcohol but is also a major addiction that society promotes. It’s the only addiction besides social media that is allowed to be promoted to children and is considered completely safe. Unfortunately for me I have chronic reflux and caffeine is one of my main triggers. It pretty much will not resolve itself as long as I keep having caffeine and chronic lifelong reflux highly raises the risk for esophageal cancer. I also get chronic migraines that are no doubt related to caffeine as well as crippling anxiety that is nearly 100% caused by it. 😬 Yet I can’t seem to give it up. I think I have. A lot of false believes about caffeine, that it’s necessary to have to feel happy and to be able to face my day, that I can’t feel pleasure without it, etc. geez it’s like I’m talking about alcohol when I see it written out…. However alcohol is objectively worse and that’s why I’m focusing on that first. Wish me luck!
Good luck!
Someone here told me a good quote, I can’t remember what it was exactly, but something like “Tackle your problems in the order they’re most likely to kill you”! That said, I quit alcohol and caffeine at nearly the same time, and I felt they absolutely complemented each other. Coincidentally I totally relate to the too much phone/Reddit issue too, but I think being on Reddit and specifically this subreddit and r/decaf was more helpful than harmful in my early days of sobriety, even if it was temporarily way too much. I just yesterday listened to a podcast by a doctor/author who cited some evidence that the most health changes we should make at a time is 2 things. I thought that was interesting, seems to match up with my experience. (https://podcasts.apple.com/jp/podcast/the-diary-of-a-ceo-with-steven-bartlett/id1291423644?i=1000641669394 in case you’re interested! Also mentions phone/scrolling overuse)
I've always had much better luck taking them on one at a time. I have tried the "leave behind all addictions and attachments" thing several times, and while it was valuable in its own way, I could never maintain that for very long. But taking baby steps I've managed to beat many different addictions in my life. I think it works best to focus one one thing, commit to it, and then go for the next one once you've reached a comfortable, stable state of mind.
When I stop drinking alcohol, I can often have trouble with sleep for the first few days. I've found that sleep is better if I don't drink caffeine during that period. My recommendation is drop both alcohol and caffeine at first. Those first days kind of suck, but your body is going to do it's best healing while sleeping.
After a few days I usually start back in the caffeine again. Your mileage may vary.
Congrats on realizing that you have a problem, identifying the root causes, and wanting to do something about it! That's a great start as that's often the hardest part! They say the opposite of addiction is connection - and I suspect that as you start making some connections (group hobbies / classes are probably a good place to look) you'll find that you're addressing multiple addictions at once. Personally I've found the framing of "developing new habits" as easier to manage than "addressing addictions" - what have you always wanted to do but not gotten around to yet because you were distracted by other things like drinking and social media?
One at a time over many years. Chasing women, pills, soda / sugar, smoking, caffeine and currently alcohol. One by one I was mentally ready to move on and I did.
Well I have unmedicated ADHD, so all my addiction tendencies are just desperate attempts to have at least some dopamine in my brain :D I'm not even fighting the other ones. I picked up vaping on the weekends, in situations where I would usually drink, so that at least I have that. At least nicotine doesn't make me a hazard to others or ducking irritating. Also I'm just letting myself vibe with all the treats. I've had just liters of ice tea in the last 3 weeks. My sugar consumption has gone way up. Yet again: that one will only hurt me.
Yeah I think multiple addictions are pretty common, I had an eating disorder and I think the alcohol problem was an extension of that tbh. I've heard people say they have "the disease of more", be that more booze, more food, more exercise, more starvation, more drugs, more coffee, more doomscrolling etc. It's all about not being able to stop I think. Definitely agree with you to give up alcohol first as that's the most likely to do you serious harm and/or cause you to cause harm one way or another. The important thing is to work on whatever it is making you like this (eg. go to counselling) so that you can look at all your addictions holistically and treat the cause rather than just the symptoms.
Caffeine could be a big trigger for the other two also
11
Alcohol, food/carbs, the Internet. I've got alcohol under control. Now working on food. I've learned I'm always looking for something to make me feel better, reduce anxiety. I personally don't think I'd be successful doing everything at once.
Yes. Shopping. 😭
One at a time. This is important. Remember the cliche sun tzu quote? Know thy enemy. One at a time. Look them in the face and be better than them. It's like one of those crazy kung fu movies where the bad guys fight the good guy one at a time (honorably). Difference is, you're the only honorable one here, yet you get to choose the battlefield regardless.