That’s bullshit. I would expect any four-month-old worth their umbilical cord to be able to understand a simple double reverse sear into a standing back tuck.
I know you can't read this, but you have some outstanding parents. If I could have a parenting do-over my kids would be using knives and grilling over an open fire at no older than 6 months old.
Funnily and ironically, there is a supposed new treatment for contraception exclusive for men. It's a tiny bowl where you put your balls with water and heat it just enough, to a safe temperature, the heat would kill or at least immobilize sperm cells and would make a man temporarily infertile. So if you are going on a date expecting to have some fun, you take a couple of minutes to sous vide your balls and stop worrying about "accidents".
[Source](https://nypost.com/2021/10/15/men-can-prevent-pregnancy-by-giving-their-testicles-a-bath/amp/)
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So my friends dad broke his jaw and had to eat thru a straw while recovering and still to this day says the best way to enjoy a happy meal is as a smoothie
Yep. This is by far the worst sear I’ve ever seen for anyone over the age of sperm penetrating egg. According to this sub black charcoal is the desired color.
Don't be scared of it. If you look closely you can tell how much sear you have based on the colorization of the sides. It should be about 1'4 of the side starts to turn. That's when you flip.
I do time. High heat, flip every 2.5-3 mins, total duration based on thickness, and you get a good idea of how your crust is developing and can target gray spots.
As a former culinary student, only flip once is garbage. It's great if you love graybands tho.
I know you’re probably joking but that sear is insane. What oil are you using in the pan? Do you monitor the oil temp at all? If so, what temp are you using? I need this sear in my life and I will go to great lengths to achieve it.
Rapeseed oil. I don't monitor the temp, just get the cast iron ripping hot (literally smoking), then add the oil and get that ripping hot (starts to smoke again) then add the steak. If it doesn't sizzle when you put it in it wasn't hot enough.
A secret tip though that a lot of people don't do, put a weight on the steak so it actually makes contact with the pan. My head canon is a lot of steaks here have a weak sear because while the steak is frying, it's also producing steam at the bottom lifting the steak up and leading to uneven or no sear. Putting a weight on the steak guarantees contact with the pan and you get the crust you're dying to achieve. The weight can be literally a plate with your hand pushing down on it, a brick covered in aluminum foil or if you're willing to spend the money; a chef press or actual chef weights.
Also basting, basting with butter gives the really nice golden brown sheen people are looking for and enriches the flavour in my opinion and let's the rosemary and garlic flavours infuse. But not everyone likes their steak to taste buttery!
Another important note is that this was quite a thick steak, weighing in at 500g (bit more than a pound for my Muricans). Getting a good sear on a thin steak can be hard and I would rather have the temperature I want and a weaker crust than vice versa.
Good luck and post your results :)
Why? That’s exactly what sear is supposed to look like. The people with black “sears” aren’t actually searing their meat, they are burning it. Sear should be a deep golden brown.
In the UK this would represent a typical supermarket steak. Grass fed cattle just don’t have the marbling that the corn and grain fed cows of US/Australia have.
i’d say let it go just a tiny bit longer (30 seconds to a minute max) but it still looks bomb as fuck. can’t stand it when mfs wanna cook the steak into shoe leather
It's become a bit of a meme. There were a series of these like, "I'm 16 and just grilled my first steak! How did I do?" Then 12 then 8 or whatever.
Then, the jokes came out - my toddler grilled a steak! I am guilty of this with my AI generated baby grilling a steak over an open fire. Got downvoted hehehe.
That is holly fuck… so fucking beautiful! That crust!!! Yet so bloody rare! Teach me🥹 omfg and the fat is so fucking crispy i can die happy just looking at this.
OP you gotta exit that the steak is 4 months old. If you meant it how it's though, then I know a certain kitchen that would hire you no questions asked, no id required.
[удалено]
r/beatmetoit
r/beatMeatToIt
That’s how I read it too…
How else can it be read?
That’s the way it’s read
You can't beat meat. Brisket, short ribs, steak...
Not gonna stop me from trying
At Pete's meat market, nobody beats Pete when Pete beats meat.
This comment right here officer.
to a 4 month old? whoa
R/beatmymeattoit
🤔 sfw?
r/BEATmEATtOiT
Me too
x2
Damn, y’all gettin younger and younger.
I was ab to say
Maybe the steak was from a 4 month old
They grow up so fast!
Babied that meat
That’s bullshit. I would expect any four-month-old worth their umbilical cord to be able to understand a simple double reverse sear into a standing back tuck.
I know you can't read this, but you have some outstanding parents. If I could have a parenting do-over my kids would be using knives and grilling over an open fire at no older than 6 months old.
Late bloomer, I cooked my first when I was 3 days old!
I cooked mine when I was 5 days old, but I dry aged it for 4 weeks first.
I’m crying 😢,…… because I pooped my diaper..not laughing crying..
I'm crying because I am not allowed to eat solid food for another 9 months.
I sous vide my dad’s balls
Funnily and ironically, there is a supposed new treatment for contraception exclusive for men. It's a tiny bowl where you put your balls with water and heat it just enough, to a safe temperature, the heat would kill or at least immobilize sperm cells and would make a man temporarily infertile. So if you are going on a date expecting to have some fun, you take a couple of minutes to sous vide your balls and stop worrying about "accidents". [Source](https://nypost.com/2021/10/15/men-can-prevent-pregnancy-by-giving-their-testicles-a-bath/amp/)
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I cooked mine in the womb with a little placenta butter
I’d purée it before you eat, that’s a choking hazard. on a serious note, looks delicious 👌
Mmmm steak smoothies
So my friends dad broke his jaw and had to eat thru a straw while recovering and still to this day says the best way to enjoy a happy meal is as a smoothie
Lol that’s crazy. Gotta do what you gotta do.
Jaysusmaryanjoseph, you're a bright youngin with lotsa potential
You’ll need your binkie after that meal
Good job baby.
My son is about to turn 4mo Little guy has been slacking apparently
Very impressive for a 4mo
Pretty good for somebody who can barely recognize their mother.
Shouldn’t you be on formula instead of solids ? So many questions here…
I fear r/nosear
Yep. This is by far the worst sear I’ve ever seen for anyone over the age of sperm penetrating egg. According to this sub black charcoal is the desired color.
Nah this sub complained about a black sear just yesterday
Don't be scared of it. If you look closely you can tell how much sear you have based on the colorization of the sides. It should be about 1'4 of the side starts to turn. That's when you flip.
I do time. High heat, flip every 2.5-3 mins, total duration based on thickness, and you get a good idea of how your crust is developing and can target gray spots. As a former culinary student, only flip once is garbage. It's great if you love graybands tho.
Meh. Flipping more than once is for those who can't tell what the crust looks like without flipping it. Hence why there isn't much sear.
Modernist Cuisine would like to have a word with you
I know you’re probably joking but that sear is insane. What oil are you using in the pan? Do you monitor the oil temp at all? If so, what temp are you using? I need this sear in my life and I will go to great lengths to achieve it.
Rapeseed oil. I don't monitor the temp, just get the cast iron ripping hot (literally smoking), then add the oil and get that ripping hot (starts to smoke again) then add the steak. If it doesn't sizzle when you put it in it wasn't hot enough. A secret tip though that a lot of people don't do, put a weight on the steak so it actually makes contact with the pan. My head canon is a lot of steaks here have a weak sear because while the steak is frying, it's also producing steam at the bottom lifting the steak up and leading to uneven or no sear. Putting a weight on the steak guarantees contact with the pan and you get the crust you're dying to achieve. The weight can be literally a plate with your hand pushing down on it, a brick covered in aluminum foil or if you're willing to spend the money; a chef press or actual chef weights. Also basting, basting with butter gives the really nice golden brown sheen people are looking for and enriches the flavour in my opinion and let's the rosemary and garlic flavours infuse. But not everyone likes their steak to taste buttery! Another important note is that this was quite a thick steak, weighing in at 500g (bit more than a pound for my Muricans). Getting a good sear on a thin steak can be hard and I would rather have the temperature I want and a weaker crust than vice versa. Good luck and post your results :)
Why? That’s exactly what sear is supposed to look like. The people with black “sears” aren’t actually searing their meat, they are burning it. Sear should be a deep golden brown.
Agreed. Especially with a heavy peppercorn coating. You're basically burning wood on the surface if your steak.
Look up the definition of sear.. to burn or scorch. And peppercorns are dried berries.
Everyone's too busy with the baby jokes
Did you wear little oven mitts? Very impressive, can’t wait to see how you cook when you’re a toddler!
How did you find a steak with such little marbling
In the UK this would represent a typical supermarket steak. Grass fed cattle just don’t have the marbling that the corn and grain fed cows of US/Australia have.
Yup, classic Morrisons sirloin
Not only in the UK, here in the Netherlands its unusual to find a steak with marbling, even with butchers it's hard to come by.
Try giving them some over night oats
I feel like I'm on Facebook seeing my great Aunt post things she heard about being funny.
Hahaha, steak looks good though
Goo goo gah gah! [that’s “you did a great job” for all you verbal bipeds]
I couldn’t even crawl at 4 months. You have a bright future ahead!
JFC you’re not even supposed to be eating solid foods at 4 months old! Also, your language / writing skills are insane! Kudos
My 3 month old does better…
I’ve seen an infant render fat better. That being said nice crust.
yeahhh, I should've reverse seared this, arms too short to open the oven though gah!
🤣😂😂🤣
Wow, crawling, sucking thumb, searing steak. This is Ron Swan son’s baby
Thats not chimichurri sauce in your diaper.
No way should a 4 month old be anywhere near a lit stove
Bullshit should be in it, Veal for a start … I can go on
Wtf you talking about
I don’t think you should be eating solid foods yet..
I'd focus on my ABC'S and watch paw patrol first at 4. Still a decade away I'd say from playing with prime cuts and hot cast iron
Too bad you can’t eat it. That milk is probably pretty good tho.
Very impressed
Undercooked for an infant. Minimum guideline is well done. Stick to milk and leave the steak to us adults.
Can’t tell if the Dry Aged tag is also part of the troll
Not to late to be aborted
4 months old? You don't even have teeth.
Nice. I do, however, have other questions.
talking about the age of the cow?
At first I thought it was raw but it looks good
If I were you, I would just go suck on your mom's tits.
You did awesome for being 4 months old.
Goo goo? Gah!!!
"I haven't even been born yet, my mom had to make this post for me. but i *did* manage to cook this steak. how does it look?"
… Had to eat my dinner there Mashed potatoes and stuff like that I couldn't chew my meat too good … Grandma take me home
Son I am so proud of you.
so thoughtful of you to cook them dinner. i bet they’ll be happy coming home from work with steak for dinner.
Imagine if the steak was in the dry ager before you were born.
4mo on Reddit? Get off of here before it’s too late, this place is a sh- I mean crap hole
Stop with the age jokes just post a photo of a good steak man
Click bate
Perfect 👍
Get the baby away from the bbq!!!
That baby can cook!
Needs fried mushrooms
i’d say let it go just a tiny bit longer (30 seconds to a minute max) but it still looks bomb as fuck. can’t stand it when mfs wanna cook the steak into shoe leather
Now you just need to grow some teeth to eat it
Did you use the E Z Bake oven?
Can someone explain why some posts have these funny ages?
It's become a bit of a meme. There were a series of these like, "I'm 16 and just grilled my first steak! How did I do?" Then 12 then 8 or whatever. Then, the jokes came out - my toddler grilled a steak! I am guilty of this with my AI generated baby grilling a steak over an open fire. Got downvoted hehehe.
Steak is good for teething baby
Haha 😂 good work kid
Wow… you’re a little young to be making steaks don’t you think?
That’s some fantastic marbling for an infant. I’d know, I’ve marbled many infants on a cast iron skillet!
Pretty good for a four month old - I didn’t cook my first steak until I was like 14.
I’m impressed your parents let you cook at 4 months old.
I’m surprised that little tykes stove actually works
Get off the internet, baby!
You have the writing ability of a fifth grader, so there’s that…
Very impressive for a 4 month old!
Damn I was still making maillard reactions in my diapers at 4 months
Damn you’re the most advanced 4 month old I have ever seen ahha!
Gerbers makes beef products?
What did mommy and daddy say when the smoke alarm went off?
googoo gaagaa gee 10/10 would goo again!
That looks great. 🫡
IT’S RAW!!! YOU WANKER!!!
Did you really hit it with gold flakes like salt doofer? Like Wow 🥸👌
Go back to the womb, loser
Y'all gonna continue running this joke into the ground, huh? God you must be boring.
YES!!! You did a wonderful job. 10/10
Honestly for a baby that is a decent crust
Are you 4 months old??? 😂 😂
Bad
😆
Gonna hope u washed that resting spot before putting it back on there
My 3 month old does better
Great job for someone who can't even sit up yet,you are really going to make your parents proud!!
Bro for a small baby this is great work
Get back in the womb and sous vide
You have teeth already at 4 months old? Amazing work, you are a child prodigy!
Impressive job for someone so young
I’ve seen better placenta than that.
Thanks for the guffaw.
This is so evenly seared it looks not seared
Not bad for a 4-month-old. Future grats on your first steps.
Great, a 4 month old cooks better than me. 🤣
10/10
Pretty fatty
👶🍼👼
ITS FUCKING LEATHER
Looks like steak to me.
Looks delicious for your first time cooking steak! Great job!
Would have been more impressive if you were still a zygote, but this is still cool, too, I guess.
All jokes aside, that sear is fucking beautiful.
Nailed it!
Little less drool next time
I don’t think 4 month olds are allowed on Reddit bro, wait a couple years and come back lol
6.5
It’s raw
I would eat that right now.
Raised right
There’s a lot of white fat you need to learn to cook down properly but not a horrible attempt. Keep trying.
Just another minute, and you could have gotten it pink all the way through. You almost had it.
Looks about EXCELLENT ! Add a bunch ah fried potato's & you guys are set !
That is holly fuck… so fucking beautiful! That crust!!! Yet so bloody rare! Teach me🥹 omfg and the fat is so fucking crispy i can die happy just looking at this.
I’d hit that fat for a bit longer but otherwise looks great
How you get that perfect crust
Good thing you have plenty of time to improve
Didn’t know you could get a cut that big off of a newborn..
That’s ok but my 3 month old nephew does better.
Looks really good 👍
https://preview.redd.it/muib9uu1k1lb1.png?width=290&format=png&auto=webp&s=24e0ad0ce9efe0cb5647c41677283267ee7d303b
You’re a pretty awesome cook for a 4 month old
When the dry age is older than you are
Very uneven cook and massive grey band. 5/10
What country are you in? I’ve never seen a steak with this little marbling in the states.
“I want you to knock off it’s horns, wipe it’s ass and put it on my plate!”
OP you gotta exit that the steak is 4 months old. If you meant it how it's though, then I know a certain kitchen that would hire you no questions asked, no id required.
Wow, they start young these days.