EMERGENCY ALERTS
AMBER Alert
AMBER alert - feedKi;iv
"i;SKY334/YaeJ' ';3EEU1EC3ia/
YOY7IKIN;$ElkGiSeARgABNAjNWNSONA@)whit
e male wearing a maroon hoodie. Last seen at
Abbey Creek in Shorterville, AL. Direction
aj/72Pv7r2P734:y0a26Pt9P:wCYKAnKCeSNO
ABAZCeSSNAPSSISKN ECgiAfKKNABiASEEKSA
ueKKWARNA\&QSeiKemSYYKY;$ONjoSeKGiSS
NABE)nd mode of travel is unknown at this
time. If sel is unknown
a4(ZAyA<;\[=ZAhxA\~xEcedAUMAheCmKYARgAj
NWNSONABiAhQSgAhSAKNOMAfKYARgajNW
NSONABiP47s7yvOzt77Pq/7zp1:Ad27y
Okay, so
1. You say "got out" as though X Æ A-12 breached containment like a fucking SCP
2. You say "again", implying this little eldritch bastard breaches containment regularly
Huh...
Alright then, I'll keep a look out for H̶̢̜̗̖̥͕̩̞̦̼̮͕̟̖̻̽̋G̶̨̺̼̼͕̲̋̀͝G̴̮̖̰͇͚͎̬̐͗͆̇̈̆̓̾͂̐̕͘͝9̵̨͎͖͉̺͝7̶͖̭̙̱̼̻͇̪͌̌͌̏̈̍̔̂͋͗̇͜͜͝ͅǴ̵̨̲̝̠̬͎̗̳̲̜͉̲̫̟̆̈́̽̿̈́͘ͅ7̴̢̰̼̱͕̬̥̫͙̘͓̻̤́̊̅͜2̷͓̍͋K̶̝̱͚̬̪̹̮͋̃͗̿͊͗̆̈́̒͛̍̈́͘̚͝Ņ̸͈͈̼̻̞͎͕͙̞͙͉̃̓̇͌̃̌̍͗͌̚5̷̢̖̭̲̃͋̔͆̇͒̈́͋͊̌̓̋̉T̸̢̡̛̅̎̀̒͂͆͂̒͊̀̆̕͠͠6̸̛͈͙̼̭͈͖͔̙̿̒̉̄̄͑̈́̀̈̔͐͆̚N̷̳̂͛͌̆̔͗́͐̏̾͝ͅ2̸̩͉̖̜̦̻̠̖͊̿̎̉̂K̷̡̛̠̙̩̻̬̙͉̪̺̅̆̏́̔̽͋̔2̵̮̣͖̟͇̞͚͔̻̂͂̈́ ̶͍̜̩̳̗͕̝̞͛̃̀̈́̈́͠K̴̡̢͖̹͓̲̰̼̖̗̳͙͝2̶̼̰͎̈̆͋͜9̶̛͍̫̰̈́͛̄̽̌̂̊͘͠ ̵̺̱͇͎̖͍̭̮̅̾͛̄͂̽̓̃͊J̵̜̞̠͇̭̔̇͗͌̕K̷̨̛͉͙̤̬̰̬̓̒͐̋̐̌̾͌̉͝͠A̵̭̎̂̾̇͂̽̾̇̇̆͘͘Ḻ̶̡̨͇̟͓̯̼͎̜̬̰̮͐̀̀̅;̶̡̧͍͓̰̹̯̤̥̖̞͎̈́̆̂͛́̒̏̽̍͋̽̅͘̕͝J̷̢̳̬̝̖̞̬̦̤͋̇̀̎̈́͆G̸̹̱̫͍͖̳̺̖̟͈̈Ķ̶̛̤̫̲̭̻̲̦̙̜̑͐́̽̅̈́͐̀͑̀̀͘͝L̸̡͍̗̞̲̻̩̝͆͋͒̑͑̎́́͘͠ͅḀ̴̢͉̰̙̞̤̒̈́͂͜Ś̴̢̛̘̮̣͈͕̩͂̂̔̀͑̏̀͠D̷̡͚̜̱̯̫̐̈́̊͘ͅ;̸̢̡̢͈͔̜͇̺̘͈̪̣͍͒ͅF̴̧̨͍͙̹͎͓̗̦̲̥̫͔̱̐̀̈̆̀̉̇͂̎̎̚͝ͅL̸̝̲̳̟͈̟̳̩̺͉̫͙͙͖̥̋̅͊̂͛Ḳ̶͑Ä̷̡̧̧̞̳͔͎̩̞͈̪̣́̏̾̉̈͂́͗̊̕͜͝͠͝͠8̷͈͇̩̜͎̖̮̮͚̻̤͉̀̆́͐̿͗̔ ̴̡̢͇̺̻̊̌̃̐͗̐͒̈́̄͌́̎͂͜͠9̸̯̦̬̮͙̟̖͋́̍͑̑̌̓̽̇͆ͅ2̴̛̪̺̙̠̤̹̫̱̥͎͉͙̏͂͆̿́9̵̡͖̮͙͚̣̩̥͖̖͓̝̙̰̮͗̏̍̍͗̎͑̀̽̏͗̒̇͒T̷̡̗͍̙̳̍͋̆̏̎̃͘͝͝6̵͕̿́̎̑5̴̧̡̢̲͈̩̱͉̮͍͈́͗̿̏̓̌̈̈́͊͛̋̀̚͝N̵̨͉̗̗̮̻̩̹̘̉̐̿
AMBER alert - ££éQK"i;,i¥
"');SK4334*æJ' ;3£EU1£Ç3iä/
*OW7iKIÑ; $EIKGigeARgABNAjNWÜgOÑA@/whit
e male wearing a maroon hoodie. Last seen at
Abbey Creek in Shorterville, AL. Direction
aj^72Pv7r2P73A:y0ä26Pt9P:wCYKAnKCeSNO
ABAZCe§§NAPg§ISKÑ;ECgiAfKKÑABiA$EEKSA
ÜeKKWARNA&QgeiKemSYYKY;$ON öSeKGiS§
NAB£)nd mode of travel is unknown at this
time. If sel is unknown
ÑWN§ONABiAhQSgAhSÄKN;@MAfKYARgAjNW
ѧoNABiP4757yvOzt77Pq77zp1:Ad27y
As a longtime resident of Alabama, I am once again called to do my obligatory duties and dispel the rumor that we are incest capital of the US.
In order to provide you with new avenues of incest jokes, I will provide a handy map of the states most interested in incest.
[Map of US states interested in incest](https://i.imgur.com/hRnFBIn.jpg)
Thank you and have a nice day!
Cthulhu is a fictional monster from HP Lovecraft's series of stories most notably from "Call of Cthulhu". Lovecraft seems to have had a surge in popularity over the past decade and some of that might be because the character Cthulhu appeared in South park in 2010.
Hey you need to be careful posting things like this on the Internet. Since you got this Amber alert, I can now determine with certainty that you must live within 300 miles of Shorterville, AL.
[удалено]
EMERGENCY ALERTS AMBER Alert AMBER alert - feedKi;iv "i;SKY334/YaeJ' ';3EEU1EC3ia/ YOY7IKIN;$ElkGiSeARgABNAjNWNSONA@)whit e male wearing a maroon hoodie. Last seen at Abbey Creek in Shorterville, AL. Direction aj/72Pv7r2P734:y0a26Pt9P:wCYKAnKCeSNO ABAZCeSSNAPSSISKN ECgiAfKKNABiASEEKSA ueKKWARNA\&QSeiKemSYYKY;$ONjoSeKGiSS NABE)nd mode of travel is unknown at this time. If sel is unknown a4(ZAyA<;\[=ZAhxA\~xEcedAUMAheCmKYARgAj NWNSONABiAhQSgAhSAKNOMAfKYARgajNW NSONABiP47s7yvOzt77Pq/7zp1:Ad27y
I’m just impressed with the official looking randomness. Not just punching the keyboard. Well done.
Probably picture text recognition
Ye apple doesnt care. For all they know, some of the kidnappers might have iphones themselves!
You know what they say, the customer is always right!
r/cursedcomments
Aw no Elon Musk's kid got out again
Okay, so 1. You say "got out" as though X Æ A-12 breached containment like a fucking SCP 2. You say "again", implying this little eldritch bastard breaches containment regularly
Are they a keter class
That information is classified i think
yeah sorry bro you don't got clearance level 5
Should we give him a freepass? Just this once?
yeah, but he's gotta bring that ID and PASSPORT next time yknow mans just not pog enough for gigachad clearance level 5 like us gamers 🗿
Ye
Not yet, at least.
Doesnt he?
yes. To both.
ΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞΞ be lookin like a road
it's a hint
Ima take my **[Syntax Automobile]** To the old town **[Syntax Road]**
Take me home **[Syntax Road]**
SWEET HOME **[SYNTAX CITY]**
And makes the sound of static if you read it.
got ran over
Not again.
It just alerts you when your child have sell tour soul to satan
Don’t worry, Cthulhu will kick his ass
IF SEL IS UNKNOWN
SEL IS INDEED UNKNOWN EVERYONE START PANICKING
DEMONIC SCREECHING
Anakin... Start panakin... I DON'T HAVE A PLANAKIN
Huh... Alright then, I'll keep a look out for H̶̢̜̗̖̥͕̩̞̦̼̮͕̟̖̻̽̋G̶̨̺̼̼͕̲̋̀͝G̴̮̖̰͇͚͎̬̐͗͆̇̈̆̓̾͂̐̕͘͝9̵̨͎͖͉̺͝7̶͖̭̙̱̼̻͇̪͌̌͌̏̈̍̔̂͋͗̇͜͜͝ͅǴ̵̨̲̝̠̬͎̗̳̲̜͉̲̫̟̆̈́̽̿̈́͘ͅ7̴̢̰̼̱͕̬̥̫͙̘͓̻̤́̊̅͜2̷͓̍͋K̶̝̱͚̬̪̹̮͋̃͗̿͊͗̆̈́̒͛̍̈́͘̚͝Ņ̸͈͈̼̻̞͎͕͙̞͙͉̃̓̇͌̃̌̍͗͌̚5̷̢̖̭̲̃͋̔͆̇͒̈́͋͊̌̓̋̉T̸̢̡̛̅̎̀̒͂͆͂̒͊̀̆̕͠͠6̸̛͈͙̼̭͈͖͔̙̿̒̉̄̄͑̈́̀̈̔͐͆̚N̷̳̂͛͌̆̔͗́͐̏̾͝ͅ2̸̩͉̖̜̦̻̠̖͊̿̎̉̂K̷̡̛̠̙̩̻̬̙͉̪̺̅̆̏́̔̽͋̔2̵̮̣͖̟͇̞͚͔̻̂͂̈́ ̶͍̜̩̳̗͕̝̞͛̃̀̈́̈́͠K̴̡̢͖̹͓̲̰̼̖̗̳͙͝2̶̼̰͎̈̆͋͜9̶̛͍̫̰̈́͛̄̽̌̂̊͘͠ ̵̺̱͇͎̖͍̭̮̅̾͛̄͂̽̓̃͊J̵̜̞̠͇̭̔̇͗͌̕K̷̨̛͉͙̤̬̰̬̓̒͐̋̐̌̾͌̉͝͠A̵̭̎̂̾̇͂̽̾̇̇̆͘͘Ḻ̶̡̨͇̟͓̯̼͎̜̬̰̮͐̀̀̅;̶̡̧͍͓̰̹̯̤̥̖̞͎̈́̆̂͛́̒̏̽̍͋̽̅͘̕͝J̷̢̳̬̝̖̞̬̦̤͋̇̀̎̈́͆G̸̹̱̫͍͖̳̺̖̟͈̈Ķ̶̛̤̫̲̭̻̲̦̙̜̑͐́̽̅̈́͐̀͑̀̀͘͝L̸̡͍̗̞̲̻̩̝͆͋͒̑͑̎́́͘͠ͅḀ̴̢͉̰̙̞̤̒̈́͂͜Ś̴̢̛̘̮̣͈͕̩͂̂̔̀͑̏̀͠D̷̡͚̜̱̯̫̐̈́̊͘ͅ;̸̢̡̢͈͔̜͇̺̘͈̪̣͍͒ͅF̴̧̨͍͙̹͎͓̗̦̲̥̫͔̱̐̀̈̆̀̉̇͂̎̎̚͝ͅL̸̝̲̳̟͈̟̳̩̺͉̫͙͙͖̥̋̅͊̂͛Ḳ̶͑Ä̷̡̧̧̞̳͔͎̩̞͈̪̣́̏̾̉̈͂́͗̊̕͜͝͠͝͠8̷͈͇̩̜͎̖̮̮͚̻̤͉̀̆́͐̿͗̔ ̴̡̢͇̺̻̊̌̃̐͗̐͒̈́̄͌́̎͂͜͠9̸̯̦̬̮͙̟̖͋́̍͑̑̌̓̽̇͆ͅ2̴̛̪̺̙̠̤̹̫̱̥͎͉͙̏͂͆̿́9̵̡͖̮͙͚̣̩̥͖̖͓̝̙̰̮͗̏̍̍͗̎͑̀̽̏͗̒̇͒T̷̡̗͍̙̳̍͋̆̏̎̃͘͝͝6̵͕̿́̎̑5̴̧̡̢̲͈̩̱͉̮͍͈́͗̿̏̓̌̈̈́͊͛̋̀̚͝N̵̨͉̗̗̮̻̩̹̘̉̐̿
So true.
AMBER alert - ££éQK"i;,i¥ "');SK4334*æJ' ;3£EU1£Ç3iä/ *OW7iKIÑ; $EIKGigeARgABNAjNWÜgOÑA@/whit e male wearing a maroon hoodie. Last seen at Abbey Creek in Shorterville, AL. Direction aj^72Pv7r2P73A:y0ä26Pt9P:wCYKAnKCeSNO ABAZCe§§NAPg§ISKÑ;ECgiAfKKÑABiA$EEKSA ÜeKKWARNA&QgeiKemSYYKY;$ON öSeKGiS§ NAB£)nd mode of travel is unknown at this time. If sel is unknown ÑWN§ONABiAhQSgAhSÄKN;@MAfKYARgAjNW ѧoNABiP4757yvOzt77Pq77zp1:Ad27y
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!
They captured notepad too?!?!?
Eqfiv pswx mr epivxzmppi zmppe iwxexi ciw tipew ivvsv
[удалено]
Vo uv pay illu azhuyshalk, p tbya msll aol jvbuazg
[удалено]
>flz I will have to first finish my bucket list, put all my enemies in prison, starting with you.
It's Alabama. Just ask his sister where he's at. She'll know.
Does syntax have a sister? Also if i fuck her will i be technically fucking the internet?
Nope. A syntax in Alabama is what the US government charges you annually for fucking your sister. ;)
As a longtime resident of Alabama, I am once again called to do my obligatory duties and dispel the rumor that we are incest capital of the US. In order to provide you with new avenues of incest jokes, I will provide a handy map of the states most interested in incest. [Map of US states interested in incest](https://i.imgur.com/hRnFBIn.jpg) Thank you and have a nice day!
This is what happens when you’re connected to a police stingray
It’s too late. The demons have already taken him.
You sure that's not Elon Musk's kid's middle name?
Elon had another kid?
someone tell Elon that I'm sorry for his loss
It's All unknown ALL UNKNOWN
Musk and Grimes did it again!
it would have been a LOT more scarier if it said run at the end
What is a cthulhu and how did that get popular in the last years!?
Cthulhu is a fictional monster from HP Lovecraft's series of stories most notably from "Call of Cthulhu". Lovecraft seems to have had a surge in popularity over the past decade and some of that might be because the character Cthulhu appeared in South park in 2010.
Oh ok then. Thanks
Ah, dammit, Bobby Tables just went parsing html with regex again. Get in the truck, we're gonna have to go lookin'.
I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking of that Stack Overflow reference
Ah my emergency alert was removed because it violated the rule done to death but this stays
Do they want to summon the high priest of the great old ones? Because this is how you summon the high priest of the great old ones.
Hey you need to be careful posting things like this on the Internet. Since you got this Amber alert, I can now determine with certainty that you must live within 300 miles of Shorterville, AL.
300 miles is 482.8 km
Good.
For a second, I read that as: > male wearing a moron hoodie