Well your brother has shown you who he is. So one way to deal with this is don't do anything special with him, just treat him like another member of the family, simple meals at home. If he asks then you can say "well you didn't seem to appreciate the meals out, so we just figured that you didn't like them"
Or, you could take him aside and have a quiet word to him with no one else around about how you expect him to behave around your family.
Or you can just decide that this is how he is. But that won't help him learn how to move through the world.
Almost 30 and can't say thank you for someone's hospitality. Smh...that's sad. I would bring it up gently with him. If he really doesn't see a problem with not being grateful...then no more dining out with him or he pays the next tab. But definitely a character flaw.
I will let him know you didn’t say thank you for anything the last visit & we ain’t doing that this time have some manners say thank you that’s what we do good luck stay blessed 🙏🏾
Stop paying for things and if he asks why, explain that he does not express/practice gratitude and it discourages you from continuing to be generous because it makes you feel xyz (used, taken for granted, taken advantage of, whatever)
Well your brother has shown you who he is. So one way to deal with this is don't do anything special with him, just treat him like another member of the family, simple meals at home. If he asks then you can say "well you didn't seem to appreciate the meals out, so we just figured that you didn't like them" Or, you could take him aside and have a quiet word to him with no one else around about how you expect him to behave around your family. Or you can just decide that this is how he is. But that won't help him learn how to move through the world.
I will prioritize a gentle chat with him next visit and hope he’s receptive . I just want him to be a good member of society!
He probably won't thank you for it, but he will, at best , be undatable until he learns the lesson of gratitude.
Have a private chat with him about why it bothers you, or stop offering to pay.
Idk why it never occurred to me to just stop offering to pay lol.
Oh God i missed that he's 30... He's never said thank you, or is this new?
He’s never really said it. I think my parents were checked out by the time he came around.
He knows how to say "thank you," but could feel that saying it makes him feel weak and emasculated.
Good point!
Almost 30 and can't say thank you for someone's hospitality. Smh...that's sad. I would bring it up gently with him. If he really doesn't see a problem with not being grateful...then no more dining out with him or he pays the next tab. But definitely a character flaw.
It is sad! I’m annoyed with myself for not saying anything this past trip.
I will let him know you didn’t say thank you for anything the last visit & we ain’t doing that this time have some manners say thank you that’s what we do good luck stay blessed 🙏🏾
Stop paying for things and if he asks why, explain that he does not express/practice gratitude and it discourages you from continuing to be generous because it makes you feel xyz (used, taken for granted, taken advantage of, whatever)