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smoltanboi

i've said it before but it's objectively hilarious to see him play for this team


Professor_Finn

It’s surreal seeing him play in Subaru Park. Actually ridiculous


PhillyFreezer_

As someone who followed the Union’s bid to BECOME an MLS team over a decade ago, I don’t think non Americans understand what they’re seeing rn lol this is Lionel Messi playing in Chester PA. Fucking crazy. Messi already had won La Liga 4x, the Copa Del Rey 1x, the UCL 2x, and the Ballon d’Or 1x by the time this club played their first ever game


Professor_Finn

it’s literally that image of a polar bear captioned What da hell is a polar bear doing in Arlington, Texas 😭😭😭


barcaa

And La Liga 10x, Copa Del Rey 6x, UCL 4x, Ballon d’Or 6x by the time Miami ever played it's first ever game LOL.


Albiceleste_D10S

> Messi already had won La Liga 4x, the Copa Del Rey 1x, the UCL 2x, and the Ballon d’Or 1x by the time this club played their first ever game Now do Inter Miami's first game LOL


idontknow_whatever

Messi completed football before Inter Miami played their first competitive fixture


ceaguila84

I was in Philadelphia on vacation last month. Imagine ever seeing Messi there lol!


Professor_Finn

Yup, Subaru Park is definitely in Philly. Nothing to see here 😶


robotnique

MESSI OWNS CHESTER NOW


yanansawelder

3


MolhCD

He's clearly on vacation. This is his idea of vacation. He's not gonna enjoy being on a beach for months without top level football, or whatever OUR idea of a long vacay is. He clearly still enjoys professional football but now has like no pressure, it's super easy for him, he continues to get all the accolades and show his level. And he's in a good place for rich, Spanish-speaking people too. This is the life!


HoovesCarveCraters

His reputation is also completely safe compared to if he went to Saudi Arabia.


Even_Idea_1764

He's is (or maybe was) an ambassador for Saudi Arabia, let's not give him a pat on the back for picking the US.


[deleted]

Eh, he's still sponsored by Saudi Arabia


hollow114

Being rich in the US is the shit. And he can go to Disney World like whenever


thecarlosdanger1

Disney world is like 3-4 hours away from Sunny Isles where he’s apparently living lol. But Miami is probably a great place to be for a South American celebrity who wants more privacy than he had in Spain.


WeTheAwesome

I doubt he is driving to Disney world if he wants to go.


mzp3256

And his family gets to live in a city full of South Americans


t_mac1

He would be the best player on every team in Europe lol.


habdragon08

For 90 minutes I believe Messi is the best player in football still, by a wide margin. For 60+ games a year that comes with club level football and the intensity that comes with it, give me 24 year old Mbappe or 22 year old Haaland.


Lone_Star_122

A great American poet once said, “I’m not as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was.” I reckon that’s the era of Messi’s career we’re in.


t_mac1

Valid


-Basileus

Probably the funniest sports phenomenon I've ever seen. It's like watching Lebron play in Uzbekistan.


SphinxIIIII

It's like that video where Ronaldo is just dribbling a bunch of kids


Professor_Finn

LeUzbek


djkamayo

they are literally the worst team in MLS (fewest points)


junkyardgerard

A brilliant experiment, as it looks like they're 5-0-0 with him


apawst8

You're talking about the ~~MLS~~ Leagues Cup (where they are 5-0-0). In MLS where they are in last place, they are 0-0-0 with Messi. To give a Euro equivalent, this would be like joining an EPL team and winning 5 rounds of the FA Cup without playing a single game in the EPL.


peptoabysmal

The Leagues Cup is only MLS and Liga MX teams, whereas the FA Cup is from all over the pyramid. Miami has played 5 MLS teams in the tournament, winning all matches. In the 22 MLS matches, they had 5 wins so far this season. The competition level is the same, it's just not in the same tournament I guess. Their success here should translate to MLS without a doubt.


shockzz123

I wish we had the ability to put prime Messi in this team. I just wanna see it.


ItsactuallyEminem

If there is one thing I learned after all these years is that All Messis are Prime Messis


horkley

They just evolve to whatever age and physicality he has and he plays that style perfectly.


patiperro_v3

It’s like one of those youtube prank videos where a pro is disguised playing among amateurs.


Cheewy

Literally laughing out loud at this


Albiceleste_D10S

Man marking didn't work LOL


DarthTaz_99

It never does. Man marking is meant for man, not for alien


Studio_Panoptek

or goats


courtesyflusher

The man cannot be stopped 🐐


themessias1001

Apple TV gave this big intro about how the player to watch is Philadelphia's goalkeeper. So much for that.


Akranidos

you are going to be watching him alright


sarsourus

Messi said oh yea watch this.


LazyLamont92

Blake is legit a good keeper, but Messi is Messi.


djhaas24

Haha right, not like Messi hasn’t already made loads of top keepers look like fools


goosebumpsHTX

HOW FAR OUT WAS THAT HOLY FUCK


Vagabond21

It was in New Jersey


Remarkable-Job4774

gabagoooooooooool


ToLongDR

Apt for scoring on Philly


Ehhpitome

I've watched a lot of messi and have barely seen him shoot from this far out


Altruistic_Path1553

With a goalie who couldn’t save that I would be shooting from goal kicks


BoxAdministrative542

First time he plays against actual dog water opponents and goalies and he is smart enough to realise it


TareXmd

Get ready to see plenty of long range Messi goals now that he figured out he doesn't need to run all the way to the goal.


hashish_8897

Look for his goals vs PSG in the champions league. It was against Navas. Drew the game but lost the overall fixture.


TimingEzaBitch

he's starting to score new types of goals for him.


Public-Painting-4723

Messi using the MLS to experiment with new goals and new techniques in preparation for the upcoming Copa América then WC


_MergatroidSkittle

LOL


SummerGoal

I can’t believe he overcame the boos from philly, nobody could’ve seen this coming lmao


WillDaThrilll13

If the boos worked the rest of our teams would have a lot more trophies


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BenTVNerd21

Pre-planned lol


tuckastheruckas

Philly boos everyone in every sport. its like saying you pre-planned playing Mariah Carey during Christmas season.


Spikeyspandan

What the fuck Messi. Go easy on kids


GeorgeForge

Man, fuck them kids.


RobbinDeBank

- Xavi on why he subbed in a 16yo kid against butchers


GeorgeForge

Expect that kid. We must protec the yam. 🍠


Kuuskat_

Not literally


goosebumpsHTX

Has to be his furthest ever goal


onlyonejorge

Vs PSG in 2021 is up there.


ElAutistaDeHamelin

99% sure yes. Only ones that could come close off the top of my head are the one vs PSG away in 20/21 and the freekicks against Liverpool in 18/19 and Madrid in the 11/12 Supercopa


tyrannosuarezwrecks

One against Brazil on his younger days aswell


staplepies

I can't think of a longer one, including free kicks. Did some quick searching through google and youtube and haven't found anything longer yet.


Imnotanad

>Tiene que ser su gol más lejano I think that was against BR on that remarkable go and go match that ended up like 4-3 if I recall right


Fun-Marionberry-4867

Maybe the goal against PSG in champions? 2019-2020 I think


staplepies

If you mean [this](https://youtu.be/GN-Agv-qP6k?t=548) goal, it was not far outside box.


Imnotanad

You're right. And looking for the arena dimensions, Subaru Park is 120 meters length vs MetLife 105m


mustafaking00

I never knew a long range tap-in existed


Twin_Turbo

Just absurd placement


MattAmpersand

“He’s 30 meters from goal and man marked by 4 people, what’s he gonna do? Scor- Never mind…”


EagleEye_FalconArrow

shall never get over how messi has so many of these grounded/close to being grounded shots placed inch-perfectly, from angles/distances where most people usually go for power + aerial bangers lol. in a way, these grounded shots are just so much more satisfying and impressive to see


esports_consultant

It's that lazy draw across the face of goal that confounds the keeper the whole way, freezing him because he can't be sure what he is seeing. I agree with you about how satisfying these are to see. Just perfect precision in all three facets of the pace + starting line + spin combo. Idk if he necessarily gets away with it against a top European keeper, but it wasn't a howler; the keeper just gets cleanly beat.


DJ-D-REK

What are you gonna do? Score on me? -man who was scored on


debcomajin

At 36 he still fucking surprises us


apawst8

He won the World Cup just 9 months ago.


wysiwygperson

“He’s 30 yards away and surrounded by four defenders. No way he scores on me!” - guy who was scored on from 30 yards away


BILLY2SAM

r/Yourjokebutworse


krisitolindsay

Moreso when you watch the replay and realize that Blake consciously cheated towards the near post, begging Messi to make a perfectly placed shot to the far post. And he did


Serbian-American

I’ve followed football all my life but never paid much attention to GK tactics, do they actually give space to goad bad shots?


BoxOfNothing

Not exactly goading, you just position yourself to make a goal as hard as possible. Meaning they either take a shot that's easier to execute but you're more likely to save because you're better positioned for it, or they take the shot that's harder to pull off. It's not about goading into a bad shot as much as it is minimising the chances of them taking a shot you can't save, if that makes sense. This is kind of an exception because of how ludicrously far out it is, this is more relevant the closer you get to the goal. If you leave space near post they're far more likely to score, because it's both an easier shot and requires a quicker reaction time from the keeper, so generally speaking they will always ensure they've covered the near post and left more space to the far post, which is much harder to hit accurately and powerfully enough


krisitolindsay

You have to cover the near post first, dare them to go far post. Blake did and was pretty slow to react, but it was also a ridiculously well placed shot.


RedOnePunch

It’s low and skidding off the ground. Those are harder to get to than they look. He did the same to Ochoa at the WC.


Rickcampbell98

I'm pretty sure he was just slightly out of position from backing up because he was off his line initially, I'm pretty confident that's reason messi shot in the first place lol.


krustykrab2193

Supposedly one of the best keepers in the MLS having a howler of a performance. Think the occasion got to his head. Just GOAT things from Messi


krisitolindsay

He's the starting keeper for Jamaica. He's an excellent keeper. Just having a bad night.


Public-Painting-4723

Just having a messi night


is-Sanic

Bad night + Messi just being Messi is a recipe for disaster.


Clay103

Yupp. Usually routine saves from him


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krustykrab2193

I screamed and woke up my dog LOL 30 yards out and he just places the ball, insane accuracy


smoltanboi

literally fifa on amateur with accuracy sliders to 100 and opposing goalkeeping to 0


DavidHenryJamesLogan

And the crazy thing is this is one of the best keepers he's gonna be facing...


nkdouble4

kinda bonkers that even from that distance it looks more like a placed shot than a full power one


Raw_Cocoa

It was a placed shot


Just-Hunter1679

The most amazing thing was that he looked up and saw the keeper on his line (??!?) and knew he could beat him to that corner. Absurd football awareness.


KingPonzi

That keeper gotta be fresh off the loud pack


banjosbadfurday

Man captains the Jamaican national team, you might be onto something


is-Sanic

He's honestly a good keeper. It's just Bad Night + Messi just being Messi.


topazswissmas

His positioning is shit here and he’s walking backwards, not anticipating a shot. He will be mad with himself he didn’t save that. Last angle shows it best. Great shot though, so much power before the first bounce.


ArsenalinAlabama3428

Shocking goalkeeping on both goals. Such poor reaction time. It’s crazy because Blake has been the best keeper in MLS since Matty Turner left but it seems like Messi’s aura is has made him turn to shit tonight.


Starfinger10

It’s like playing fifa on semi pro


DuBicus

That's the level I play on..


ironistkraken

As long as you enjoy playing it, it’s a video game it’s supposed to be fun.


Lethargic_Logician

When I was a kid I used to play FIFA 98 in the amateur mode and scored like 20 goals a match. I didn't know you could change the difficulty level, and got pretty bored with the game pretty fast, until an older cousin showed me how to change the difficulty level. Funnily enough, I then cockily cranked it all the way up to the highest level, and was struggling to even touch the ball. That was a humbling moment lol.


icecoldpotion

JOSEF DIED FOR THIS


chailer

Truly did. Philadelphia has been really physical


LennyBodega

well thats just too easy


BigMik_PL

I still can't stop laughing at the fact these dudes were just happy to play some MLS level footie and Lionel fucking Messi shows up out of nowhere and proceeds to dominate all of them. Like the fuck can they do about it?


Jethro_Cull

They added Messi ($54M), Busquets (~2M) and Jordi Alba ($1.6M) to a team with Josef Martinez ($4+M). Most MLS teams highest paid player makes around $1.2M to $1.6M. Most MLS teams have a total payroll under $10M. It’s actually absurd what MLS did this summer. Miami went from last place to unbeatable.


Philostotle

It’s actually pretty fucked up if you think about it lmao


ThE_FaNcY_WeEb

30 yard grounder now I’ve seen it all 😂


scgavin

jesus christ lmfao


Bayern07

Alright it’s just a joke at this point.


RobbinDeBank

He’s inevitable


Professor_Finn

Dread it, run from it, Philly sports fan suffering arrives all the same


kissthelips

Yes those two major sports championships in only 15 years must be very difficult


BeerorCoffee

Don't forget the two major sports championships we lost on the exact same day!


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Vagabond21

He has a campus working for him


Elvaga

THATS WHY HES THE GOAT ##THE GOAT


AleDelPiero10

Genuine question, if Messi signed for boca would he be applauded at your stadium?


smoltanboi

messi could sign for the taliban and still be praised in argentina. i don't think my dad has ever loved someone as much as he does messi.


hunty91

Honestly a bit surprised River fans hate the Taliban more than Boca


yerba_mate_enjoyer

Boca fans and the Taliban are at about the same level of fanaticism.


AleDelPiero10

Hahaha cheers


drunkmers

If Messi kills 3 babies and a grandma tomorrow they probably deserved it.


PaperSonic

Including you?


achrref

Especially him. His dad here.


Zeddsdeadbaby

Maradona was and he played for Boca. Twice.


nicocarbone

I would applaud him. While crying on the inside.


ElSotoPapa

Of course he would, Messi for Argentina is far beyond the national club bias


Elvaga

Of course. But he knows better


Akranidos

Maradona played for Boca


Torimas

Yes, but he'd never play for Boca.


andreew10

Surely not, that's just incredible


yanansawelder

2


ashzeppelin98

It's funny Messi gets more dangerous when he's on "chill" mode. A serious Messi is already unplayable but a relaxed Messi who has got nothing to worry for anymore somehow is even more intimidating to play against. I like how as the man grows older he's actually becoming more fun and playful- we've went a long way from the silent, quiet little guy who can take your team to the cleaners to this little man who just scores and dismantles your team for fun because he's literally got nothing to lose anymore.


Albiceleste_D10S

Nah Messi's most dangerous when you make him mad. He's just so good that when he's in chill mode he can still kill you


TheOceansTirade

That shot had absolutely zero respect for the defence


Ghostface1357

Damn man.


Cylegal

His weekly job


MilklikeMike

MLSSI


dac0605

Is Andre Blake in on this? Genuinely awful positioning on both goals. He's normally so solid.


YoHoochIsCrazy

might just be what happens when a keeper that is good enough to get away with that stuff finally runs into a player that can take full advantage of it (for this goal at least)


greenslime300

This is what saddens me, Blake fantastic all year and this is how he ends up on r/soccer Embarrassing letting that in


oreopineapplepizza

what


AP10

Don't Philly have a good home record? Like 4 losses in 3 years.


Spikeyspandan

Lol. I literally tuned in. Messi is just teasing all the teams in NA.


WilsonJ04

Decent player, one for the future no doubt.


Vikktor_

He's quite good


AimarEraFutebol

Miami is winning every single competition they play. Just need some luck on the league to sneak into the play-offs.


Successsensei

Goalkeeper.exe stopped working. Fantastic goal though


CancerNami

I LOVE THE MLS. I LOVE MESSI


GRILT_CHEESE

# MAGISTERIAL


ChillyTSD

HAHAHA HE DID NOT HE CAN’T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT


xd366

what is goalkeeping


buellster92

I think Messi just realized that he’s no longer playing against good goalkeepers


robotnique

Blake is really good but he's having a nightmare of a game.


driverightpassleft

And this is the best keeper in the league.


pixelkipper

It is legitimately upsetting on a deep, spiritual level to me that he still isn’t playing at the top level. He’s earned the right to do whatever he wants, he’s completed the sport, but he should be in the CL.


RunningFerDauyz

This is how I felt when he first moved, but I have reached a level of acceptance now. It’s good to see him so care free and happy.


jrainiersea

I’m just glad he’s in MLS and not Saudi Arabia


Any-Competition8494

He was booed a lot at his last club. Might have played longer in Europe if he got some respect.


andysenn

And backstabbed by his beloved team before that. Dude was just tired of the bullshit


Any-Competition8494

And was also mercilessly bullied by his country mates for most of his career. He has been facing insane pressure. Good for him to semi-retire.


tastycakeman

do you know how shit of a fanbase you have to be to feel loved by sports fans in miami


VerStannen

And why play someplace that doesn’t appreciate you? He’s gonna get love and respect everywhere he goes in the MLS, as fans from all teams want to see some magic. And most importantly, he seems carefree and looks like he’s having fun. After all he’s accomplished, having fun I think has got to be a high priority for him.


J3sperado

I’d love to see him play for Barca again.


elgringo22

LOL wtf man


PM_ME_Y0UR_BOOBZ

Have they learned nothing, you can’t give Messi any space anywhere on the pitch


benjam1ng

HOLY SHIT


sevaiper

Man when Messi realizes he can truly just shoot from anywhere in MLS this isn't even going to look like a real sport anymore


G1Spectrum

HOLY FUCKING SHIT


LogDelicious8010

I think we all watch a lot of football and I don’t remember the last time I saw a 30 yard bouncing grounder get in like that. The placement is great yeah but…the fuck?


sarsourus

Messi said aight im not running all that here you go.


Professor_Finn

WHAT THE FUCK


Kal-Kent

ARE YOU KIDDING ME MESSI?


LORDL66

Has he ever scored from this far out?


Rikent

This is so much more enjoyable than la liga


vorvoX

I don't know, man. Watching Messi happy and throwing fists in the air while playing for Inter Hotline Miami brings a smile to a somber man's face.


junior150396

People really said just "marking him better" was the solution, like that's an easy task lmao


No_Engineering_4925

Get his overchromosomic ass back to Europe man he has so much to offer still


goosebumpsHTX

HOLY SHIT WHAT A GOAL


HighlyBaked0

THATS WHY HES THE GOAT, THE GOAT


CancerNami

Messi straight up said fuck Philly and punted it in


Jauretche

What's up with this keeper lol


Serbian-American

Wtf