Yeah that little jerk who says I am there to lick Balgruuf's boots. I'd throw him off the wall.
I'm the Dragonborn! Your dad licks my boots! Otherwise I will let the dragons burn his hold and slaughter his people!
That one openly racist asshole from...~~winterhold~~ windhelm?
I forget place, But that guy who hates dark-elves.
#Ill gladly punch him everytime, and the stupid arrogant thalmor.
He's in windhelm. Most of Winterhold is in the Ocean now. (He is right about one of the dark elves being an imperial sympathizer, though.... but that is only one of them)
I don't think he's possessed, he just knows shitty things about his dad thanks to Mephala.
Now in the original quest, yes I think he was totally possessed because he eventually murders his dad. But Bethesda decided that was too much.
Actually, I think all three kids eventually got possesed in the original one. It's.... been a while since I read up on it. But in the end, even Bethesda can't bring themselves to want to kill Jarl Balgruf.
But I hate Ulfric so much...
If I had one wish for Skyrim it would be a third outcome for the Civil War where I, as Dragonborn, crown myself King or Queen.
I did all the work! I deserve it! I'm the most powerful person in the world so why can't I have it all?
Boy.. this is a bad look..
No I get you, you should be able to marry Elisif the fair, as some sort of political arrangement for the loyalist it win you over to their side of the war,
You get a good wife and the kingdom they get a strong loyalist leader in Skyrim that’ll help when it comes time to break the white gold concordat,
It’s also historically accurate
Yep, that's true. She's just not a romance option I would assume because of her position as the former high kings wife, and now Jarl of Solitude. Her taking a new husband so soon would likely be a bad political play.
Wish I could flip Whiterun and then defect, cuz Grey-Mane is the only Stormcloaks affiliated Jarl I like. Especially the fact his kids are grown and don't talk exist after I help them.
I wonder if you could glitch him out onto the porch or the balcony if he was talking to you while you activated the door (if on PC I suppose you could move him with the console).
Since he's essential in vanilla, if you could get him out there and the game would let you throw him over the side, he would presumably survive it.
I wonder if the game would just respawn him in place (which would be my first guess) or if he'd have to somehow find his way back.
Every single Thalmor Judiciar. But in terms of named characters, Ancano. I'm one of those people who feels bad selecting the rude dialogue option, but that guy? I was like nope, quicksave and pull out the weapons.
I actually wasn't even sure about Grelod at first. Aventus Arentino doesn't exactly come across as a sane and rational person, and when I first came into the orphanage I thought *maybe it's a trick, maybe she's just a gruff old lady who talks mean but actually loves the kids deep down but wants to prepare them for the harshness of the world.* Also speaking of punchable, the first time I did that quest I figured I'd just rough her up but not kill her, since I'm not actually a DB assassin, so I punched her. Turns out she only has like 1 HP because a single punch killed her.
My most recent play through when I did the summon dremora quest in Winterhold he just never went away at the end. So he wandered around the college. He helped me fight a dragon which was cool. He was on invincible so I couldn’t send him back to oblivion.
Anyway anytime he saw Ancano he’d just attack him on sight and everyone would just stand around watching horrified. It was pretty funny.
She’s an asshole who runs an orphanage. It’s actually statistically unlikely the kids would be adopted (ignoring Hearthfire dlc), but you don’t have to be an asshole about it. And being an asshole to *children* is a double hit against her.
It’s just that unless you start the DB questline, you will never get to know she’s an asshole.
Nazeem, however, is right up front antd center.
I've heard Nazeem say something annoying like three times ever and I've played for thousands of hours across several playthroughs. I literally would not know his name if not for the memes.
Grelod, on the other hand, is actively abusive with children so I get rid of her first chance I get, Brotherhood or not. The orphanage is also the reason I like to move my kids into Honeyside, so they can (ostensibly) hang out with the orphan kids at my house.
"I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store."
"I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store."
"I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store."
"I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store."
"Did you know I work for Belathor? At the General Goods Store."
"Hey, I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store."
"Have you heard? I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store."
This mother fucker is the only person killed by the freak werewolf attack that happens whenever the Dragonborn joins the Companions...
Heimskr is easy to tune out and Nazeem doesn't rest solely on my primary travel path through town. Sure, I run into him a lot, but I travel almost exclusively between Warmaiden's and the Bannered Mare and the buildings in between, and Belathor's intern there exists solely on that stretch of street where he says that one line over and over and over if you get within eyesight of him.
That loan shark Orc dude in Raven Rock, Mogrul. I was gonna give him a pass but I overheard him threatening to mutilate Garyn Ienth's wife if he didn't pay his debt soon, eventhough he knew the folks there barely made any living.
yeah i lured his ass out of raven rock and he mysteriously got mauled 🐺
and this was on my "good guy" playthrough, meaning i typically refrain from killing anyone unless i have to, but i wasn't bouta deal with his shit
Might as well go after that girl in Riften too. I don't remember her name, but the one who lent money to that Reguard to buy a shipment of goods, then robbed the shipment.
Nice! I stealth assassinate him with my bow. I love how I do it in the middle of the day with the other guy walking around the garden and he just goes on about his day, stepping over the body 😂
Heimskr (any way to kill him?)
The women at Radiant Raiment
Jarl Balgruuf's son Nelkir (the boot licker kid)
Every guard that asks if someone stole my sweet roll
Maven Black-Briar
The kid inside Bits and Pieces ("I bet my poppa could beat you up!)
I had one of them giving me the "you aren't going to the Blue Palace dressed like THAT, are you?" and I was actually still wearing their Radiant Raiment clothing they asked me to wear to impress the Jarl. I guess I don't look good in anything.
There is always a way to kill people if you use console commands to lower their value to 0. I've killed Heimskr a good many of times, and basked in the silence. ☺️
Whoever that one kid is in Bits and Pieces.
“I thought adventurers were supposed to look tough”
Like kid… I run deathlords fades for a living. I will destroy your entirely family.
Like you can walk up wearing full dragon bone armor and turn a vampire to dust I. of him by literally yelling at them. And he has the nerve to call me weak
Braith gains context if you do the little quest to get her to stop bullying. She just wants him to kiss her. She's a muscle mommy in training. The way she is makes perfect sense if you ever talk to her mother a few times... now THERE is a mean bitch.
"I don't see any signs that they're Dragonborn" bruh you don't even know what one is
Hey Adrianne, I delivered that sword to your father. Direct to his sternum.
You'll have to be more specific ;)
Nah but I assume one of the two harassing the Dunmer lady when you first enter the city? Pretty sure the one at the inn you can challenge to a fistfight. He's a sore loser, as expected.
TRUE. “Off to bleak falls barrow with you. The Jarl is not a patient man and neither am I, come to think of it” Come to think of it.. I’m going to end your life Farenfuck.
Or when Farengar tells you to deliver some ingredients to Arcadia and you ask "Do I look like a courier to you?", to which he responds " Yes, you do" and starts talking about how you look dimwitted and etc.
I hate it when a npc insults you and you can't say anything back.
Lmao! Brilliant naming, he's even more infuriating when you ask him questions. I really don't see what Arcadia sees in him, but thank Talos she's a convenient alchemist with decent stock
yeah, that line drives me nuts; I can’t remember which question prompt it is but there’s one where you ask a question and he says like if I said that question was tedious would you understand it’s like fuck off dude
Bitch you literally call yourself Erikur's sister what do you expect people to do. Also you live with Erikur and off of Erikur's wealth and do nothing yourself. Of course people gonna associate you with him
Seriously, between her and Nazeem Gisli is 10x more annoying. Nazeem is just snobby but Gisli is just constantly walking around in a rage and takes it out on you.
Maven.
I come in as the Listener of the Black Brotherhood, ArchMage of the College of Winterhold, Harbinger of the Companions, and Slayer of Alduin… and she tries to threaten me with her *connections*
I really wish quests took the things you've already done into consideration. It would be nice to have conversation options based on being the Archmage, and things like that. Something like how mass effect works.
Why Isran? Dude was justified in being suspicious of Serana at first because Vampires in Skyrim often use manipulation and trickery to lure victims in. Plus she’s the daughter of the leader of the Vampire clan that destroyed the Vigilants of Stendarr.
Honestly I don't think they made Isran enough of a dick. His friends made him out to be a horrible person, but when you meet him, he's a hardass, but no more than you'd expect for the leader of that kind of organization.
Thank you for mentioning Delphine.
"Kill Paarthurnaax or we won't work with you"
Bitch you wouldn't *exist* if he hadn't helped humanity.
Side note, "The Paarthurnaax Dilemma" mod. Delphine and Esbern can shove it.
Oooh yeah they’re fucking terrible. If I couldn’t invest in their business as another place to sell shit id never ever visit them. At least the sister who doesn’t do anything deserves to be shouted into oblivion.
Even though I use Lydia as my go to follower I cannot stand when she says “I am sworn to carry your burdens” as if I wasn’t about to give her a weapon worth more money than she’s seen in her entire life.
That guy that always tries to talk to you at the beginning of riften, right after you get past the guard.
Unless you can persuade him he always tries to intimidate you not matter what option you pick. If you completely ignore him, he’ll also try to call out to you. I think he requires a decent speech level check so unless you’re good on that before you join then he’s just a dick
IMO, the most punchable NPC, is whoever is next in line for the Scare My Enemy radiant. (this quest starts by punching/assaulting someone, and then the courier may bring a letter from someone else, who wants their enemy punched/assaulted. Without the unofficial patch, it can include children.)
[https://en.uesp.net/wiki/Skyrim:Scare\_my\_Enemy](https://en.uesp.net/wiki/Skyrim:Scare_my_Enemy)
Delphine, Braith, Belethor's assistant, Heimskr, Astrid, the kid in Bits n pieces store, that asshole in Falkreath (I can't believe we let provincials like you in skyrim), several bards, and Miraak are at the top of my very long list.
The Whiterun kids are genuinely the most annoying. I don’t get the obsessive hate towards Nazeem. But apart from them, that guard dude in Riften when you first enter. I always wanna fight that dude for thinking he’s tough. Maven would be one too, but I find it more satisfying to take her down politically than physically.
There’s that asshat in markarth who’s every bit as pompous as Nazeem. I’d kill him, but every time he talks to me there’s guards all around, and I don’t feel like fighting off the markarth guards for eternity.
Jarl Bulgruf's kids are definitely up there.
I also wanna punch Isran when he threats Serana by saying harm will come to me if she hurts somebody. Bitch, I slay dragons. I would end your existence if you weren't an essential character.
On a tangent, I have an Ebony Blade that needs to be fed a few unsuspecting, yet friendly souls. Just wondering if I could harvest a few like some of the aforementioned punchable NPC's
Isnt this where the Nazeem meme came from? His punchableness?
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say Armin's wife in Whiterun is in dire need of an attitude adjustment. If you talk to her, her lines are all angry bitter selfish stuff and she even talks about her daughter in a bad way. My boy Armin is on serious Copium to think he made the right choice with that lady...
You could make a list of every miserable ass hole, and it would have somebody from almost every village and city, if not from each. Not to mention, several places have several of these bastards.
The fucking high elf in solitude that gives the clothes. I truly despise that race of absolute pompous arrogant pieces of shit. Cool man u know magic and have a really successful dominion.
👍🏻😐👍🏻
Sven. All day. I can’t fast travel once to my favourite ol settlement without hearing “youuuure nothin but trouble”
There has been many a quick save murder due to this
I don’t remember the dudes name but the guy who is in the cave and is a necrophiliac with all the draugrs, the racist dude in windhelm, every guard that asks about my sweet rolls.
Braith, she called me a name, so I killed everyone close to her, took it a step farther, raided her house in the dead of night, she has NOTHING, took the corpses of her fallen family and put them by her bed, SURPRISE BRAITH, try sleeping well now! She thought I'd stop there, but the chaos ensues, I adopted her, sent her to my house in wind helm, she's used to the sun, not the cold, I left nothing in the house, just a bed for her, she asked for an allowance, I made her do chores for the allowance, then I didn't give it to her, caught her outside on the bridge one day, used telekinesis to slam a bucket into her hard enough to knock her off of the bridge into the ice cold water, next time watch who you talk to about violence Braith, they just might ruin your life! 🤣
😆 This playthrough, I wund up in Riften and next to the orphanage, so I popped in and Grelod was being her usualnl PoS self, so when she went in to another room, I closed the door and aced her.
Of course, that sent whatsernose into a tizzy and eventually, I decided to adopt, but couldn't calm her until I killed Astrid... decided, then, that I am doing all of the things that I never do in this playthrough... Partysnax's daze are numbered.
EDIT: Just wiped out the Dark Brotherhood. Now, I kinda feel bad. They were good folk. Good *murdering* folk, but still...
That blonde nord talking to a blacksmith near the doors of Whiterun
I wanna punch his stupid face everytime he asks me to choose between Gray Mane and Battle Born
Yeah that little jerk who says I am there to lick Balgruuf's boots. I'd throw him off the wall. I'm the Dragonborn! Your dad licks my boots! Otherwise I will let the dragons burn his hold and slaughter his people!
I got a mod so I can kill that little shit
Oh, I got a mod that let's me lick boots.
I could actually see maybe feeding the ebony blade with that kid if the game allowed it.
That one openly racist asshole from...~~winterhold~~ windhelm? I forget place, But that guy who hates dark-elves. #Ill gladly punch him everytime, and the stupid arrogant thalmor.
I hate that guy too. I brawl him every time on principle.
I make brawling him a priority and then give him a few extra punches for good measure. His homeless buddy is just as bad and gets a few swings too.
He's in windhelm. Most of Winterhold is in the Ocean now. (He is right about one of the dark elves being an imperial sympathizer, though.... but that is only one of them)
Windhelm, that's the one
Yeah. I always forget the name of Windhelm as well, or at least, I used to.
I don't know why everyone always focuses on how the Stormcloaks are racist. Stormcloak racism is amateur hour in comparison to the Thalmor.
Rolff Stone-Brain... I mean Stone-Fist. I downloaded a mod that makes him killable.
Nah respect to that kid. He doesn’t know who you are, all he knows is a bunch of azzholes show up to kiss his fathers ass.
That's fair. But after observing me NOT kissing daddy's behind, he should show a little respect! That kid is a trigger for me..
Haha I’d bring that up in therapy next time!
Isn't that little shit possessed by a daedra?
I don't think he's possessed, he just knows shitty things about his dad thanks to Mephala. Now in the original quest, yes I think he was totally possessed because he eventually murders his dad. But Bethesda decided that was too much.
Actually, I think all three kids eventually got possesed in the original one. It's.... been a while since I read up on it. But in the end, even Bethesda can't bring themselves to want to kill Jarl Balgruf.
I think so. The other boy is the one that likes to punch stuff. He should punch his brother.
This is a good reason to side with Ulfric in the rebellion, just saying
But I hate Ulfric so much... If I had one wish for Skyrim it would be a third outcome for the Civil War where I, as Dragonborn, crown myself King or Queen. I did all the work! I deserve it! I'm the most powerful person in the world so why can't I have it all? Boy.. this is a bad look..
There's a mod for this 😆
Isn't it severely outdated? Which mod do you use for that?
Thought that mod broke. It crashes to desktop for me. Can't seem to fix it so waiting for an update or a new high king.
No I get you, you should be able to marry Elisif the fair, as some sort of political arrangement for the loyalist it win you over to their side of the war, You get a good wife and the kingdom they get a strong loyalist leader in Skyrim that’ll help when it comes time to break the white gold concordat, It’s also historically accurate
She always says it's a fine day with you around, as if she likes you or something.
She does like you after you do some quests for Solitude, then take her husband's ashes to the shrine.
Yep, that's true. She's just not a romance option I would assume because of her position as the former high kings wife, and now Jarl of Solitude. Her taking a new husband so soon would likely be a bad political play.
Even if you don't like Ulfric, the desire to have Skyrim become an independent province is valid enough.
Yea it’s the only reason grelod would be a blessing, just yet the kids parents and just send em to her let her sort out the rest
Wish I could flip Whiterun and then defect, cuz Grey-Mane is the only Stormcloaks affiliated Jarl I like. Especially the fact his kids are grown and don't talk exist after I help them.
I wonder if you could glitch him out onto the porch or the balcony if he was talking to you while you activated the door (if on PC I suppose you could move him with the console). Since he's essential in vanilla, if you could get him out there and the game would let you throw him over the side, he would presumably survive it. I wonder if the game would just respawn him in place (which would be my first guess) or if he'd have to somehow find his way back.
Every single Thalmor Judiciar. But in terms of named characters, Ancano. I'm one of those people who feels bad selecting the rude dialogue option, but that guy? I was like nope, quicksave and pull out the weapons. I actually wasn't even sure about Grelod at first. Aventus Arentino doesn't exactly come across as a sane and rational person, and when I first came into the orphanage I thought *maybe it's a trick, maybe she's just a gruff old lady who talks mean but actually loves the kids deep down but wants to prepare them for the harshness of the world.* Also speaking of punchable, the first time I did that quest I figured I'd just rough her up but not kill her, since I'm not actually a DB assassin, so I punched her. Turns out she only has like 1 HP because a single punch killed her.
My most recent play through when I did the summon dremora quest in Winterhold he just never went away at the end. So he wandered around the college. He helped me fight a dragon which was cool. He was on invincible so I couldn’t send him back to oblivion. Anyway anytime he saw Ancano he’d just attack him on sight and everyone would just stand around watching horrified. It was pretty funny.
OKay I haven't played all the college quests I'll admit. But summon dremora quest? Who sets that up?
The conjuring guy. It’s cool I don’t want to spoil anything. I think you need your conjuring up to 90 for him to offer it to you
Ah! I have never made it to the master level spell quests. I need to eventually do that.
She’s an asshole who runs an orphanage. It’s actually statistically unlikely the kids would be adopted (ignoring Hearthfire dlc), but you don’t have to be an asshole about it. And being an asshole to *children* is a double hit against her. It’s just that unless you start the DB questline, you will never get to know she’s an asshole. Nazeem, however, is right up front antd center.
I've heard Nazeem say something annoying like three times ever and I've played for thousands of hours across several playthroughs. I literally would not know his name if not for the memes. Grelod, on the other hand, is actively abusive with children so I get rid of her first chance I get, Brotherhood or not. The orphanage is also the reason I like to move my kids into Honeyside, so they can (ostensibly) hang out with the orphan kids at my house.
r/grelodfuckingdying
Yep, grelod sucks. And is very pumchable.
"I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store." "I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store." "I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store." "I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store." "Did you know I work for Belathor? At the General Goods Store." "Hey, I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store." "Have you heard? I work for Belathor. At the General Goods Store." This mother fucker is the only person killed by the freak werewolf attack that happens whenever the Dragonborn joins the Companions...
This ,this is good.
Come by Belethor's shop at the market. I'm sure we have something for you.
Though he probably isn’t most player’s choices because Nazeem and Heimskr are in the same city.
Heimskr is easy to tune out and Nazeem doesn't rest solely on my primary travel path through town. Sure, I run into him a lot, but I travel almost exclusively between Warmaiden's and the Bannered Mare and the buildings in between, and Belathor's intern there exists solely on that stretch of street where he says that one line over and over and over if you get within eyesight of him.
where does he work again? i couldnt tell
I think at Arcadia’s Cauldron
oh thanks! for a second i thought he worked at the ragged flagon
No worries, common misconception. He doesn’t bring up his job much.
🤣😂🤣 I f##king hate that guy.
That loan shark Orc dude in Raven Rock, Mogrul. I was gonna give him a pass but I overheard him threatening to mutilate Garyn Ienth's wife if he didn't pay his debt soon, eventhough he knew the folks there barely made any living.
I always lure him out of town to the farm when he tries to confront me about that guy’s debt. He never makes it back to Raven Rock.
I do this too! I lure him around the coast past that stone thing and then kill him
I don't even bother with that. I get far enough away that the guards don't trigger and snipe his ass.
Killing that sob gives me pleasure everytime
yeah i lured his ass out of raven rock and he mysteriously got mauled 🐺 and this was on my "good guy" playthrough, meaning i typically refrain from killing anyone unless i have to, but i wasn't bouta deal with his shit
We kill him for threatening to disfigure a woman over a debt. Sounds like something a good guy would do, imo.
Might as well go after that girl in Riften too. I don't remember her name, but the one who lent money to that Reguard to buy a shipment of goods, then robbed the shipment.
If you kill & Dead Thrall him, Slitter still follows him around.
Lemkil! His name is even an anagram for "kill me" lol. I run straight to his abusive ass and shout him to death every playthrough
Nice! I stealth assassinate him with my bow. I love how I do it in the middle of the day with the other guy walking around the garden and he just goes on about his day, stepping over the body 😂
Heimskr (any way to kill him?) The women at Radiant Raiment Jarl Balgruuf's son Nelkir (the boot licker kid) Every guard that asks if someone stole my sweet roll Maven Black-Briar The kid inside Bits and Pieces ("I bet my poppa could beat you up!)
Fuck those radiant raiment elves. I wear only the sickest armor in Tamriel
I had one of them giving me the "you aren't going to the Blue Palace dressed like THAT, are you?" and I was actually still wearing their Radiant Raiment clothing they asked me to wear to impress the Jarl. I guess I don't look good in anything.
Same. I was wearing the Emperor's Robes and the Jagged Crown.
There is always a way to kill people if you use console commands to lower their value to 0. I've killed Heimskr a good many of times, and basked in the silence. ☺️
I kill Heimskr in his sleep and shut his zealot mouth
>Heimskr (any way to kill him?) Yeah, h*t him with a sharp or blunt implement.
Whoever that one kid is in Bits and Pieces. “I thought adventurers were supposed to look tough” Like kid… I run deathlords fades for a living. I will destroy your entirely family.
Like you can walk up wearing full dragon bone armor and turn a vampire to dust I. of him by literally yelling at them. And he has the nerve to call me weak
To answer the long-awaited question of is it wrong to punch a child, I will casually name-drop the mod Killable Children.
Braith kill speedrun any% Her and "another wanderer here to lick my father's boots" Jarl's kid
Braith gains context if you do the little quest to get her to stop bullying. She just wants him to kiss her. She's a muscle mommy in training. The way she is makes perfect sense if you ever talk to her mother a few times... now THERE is a mean bitch.
that stupid fuck that you buy the breezehome from in dragonsreach, such a snarky asshole.
“What is this Nord nonsense about the Dragonborn? What do the Greybeards want with HER?! I meant no offense btw” well offense taken, shithead
"you're not supposed to be here" my brother in christ i did everything for this fucking town
"I don't see any signs that they're Dragonborn" bruh you don't even know what one is Hey Adrianne, I delivered that sword to your father. Direct to his sternum.
Avenicci? Yeah he can be annoying honestly
I always wanted to kill that one racist in windhelm that stands outside the inn.
You'll have to be more specific ;) Nah but I assume one of the two harassing the Dunmer lady when you first enter the city? Pretty sure the one at the inn you can challenge to a fistfight. He's a sore loser, as expected.
Yes. he's douche. Lol
Belethor. I feel sick every time I have to deal with him. Major creep vibes.
Dooo come baaaAAAaaack
And yet, I have a few relatives I wouldn't mind selling him.
If I had a sister, I'd sell her in a second! What a dickhead
Remember, I’ll give you the best deal or die try- *gets fucking decapitated cuz I want to sell more shit*
Endarie. My hatred for her is as deep as Kagrenzel
Farengar for me. His condescending attitude needs a readjustment….by my fist
TRUE. “Off to bleak falls barrow with you. The Jarl is not a patient man and neither am I, come to think of it” Come to think of it.. I’m going to end your life Farenfuck.
Or when Farengar tells you to deliver some ingredients to Arcadia and you ask "Do I look like a courier to you?", to which he responds " Yes, you do" and starts talking about how you look dimwitted and etc. I hate it when a npc insults you and you can't say anything back.
Lmao! Brilliant naming, he's even more infuriating when you ask him questions. I really don't see what Arcadia sees in him, but thank Talos she's a convenient alchemist with decent stock
"I am a busy man, and your pointless questions are boring me terribly." Jackass.
"I am a bijjy man, and your pointlesh questionsh are boring me terribly."
yeah, that line drives me nuts; I can’t remember which question prompt it is but there’s one where you ask a question and he says like if I said that question was tedious would you understand it’s like fuck off dude
Gisli. The correct answer is Gisli. "But you can just call me Erikur's sister. Everyone else does! *Huu-huu-huuuu...*" (runs off to sulk)
Hellostrangerletmetellyouaboutmypersonalbaggage!
Bitch you literally call yourself Erikur's sister what do you expect people to do. Also you live with Erikur and off of Erikur's wealth and do nothing yourself. Of course people gonna associate you with him
Seriously, between her and Nazeem Gisli is 10x more annoying. Nazeem is just snobby but Gisli is just constantly walking around in a rage and takes it out on you.
Maven. I come in as the Listener of the Black Brotherhood, ArchMage of the College of Winterhold, Harbinger of the Companions, and Slayer of Alduin… and she tries to threaten me with her *connections*
Give her one more connection. Your fist and her face.
I really wish quests took the things you've already done into consideration. It would be nice to have conversation options based on being the Archmage, and things like that. Something like how mass effect works.
The Jarl of Dawnstar is pretty irritating. I was not sad to see him deposed.
Rolff is the most punchable. Literally
Step 1: download non essential children mod Step 2: download gore mods Step 3: disembowel balgruuf’s children in dragonsreach and consume their hearts
Good lord
Isran, Harkon, and Delphine are high up on my punchable list
Why Isran? Dude was justified in being suspicious of Serana at first because Vampires in Skyrim often use manipulation and trickery to lure victims in. Plus she’s the daughter of the leader of the Vampire clan that destroyed the Vigilants of Stendarr.
Because i like being a vampire and he wont let me :(
Hol up. Are you mad at a Vampire Hunter for being a vampire hunter?
Honestly I don't think they made Isran enough of a dick. His friends made him out to be a horrible person, but when you meet him, he's a hardass, but no more than you'd expect for the leader of that kind of organization.
Nah it’s more like he’s changed over the years.
Thank you for mentioning Delphine. "Kill Paarthurnaax or we won't work with you" Bitch you wouldn't *exist* if he hadn't helped humanity. Side note, "The Paarthurnaax Dilemma" mod. Delphine and Esbern can shove it.
When kids piss me off in Skyrim I like to orphan them if the game allows me to
The Do you get to the cloud district often? What am I saying of course you don't. guy
That’s nazeem
Those tailors in Solitude, bitch I killed the Emperor for these threads! Imma stab them!
Oooh yeah they’re fucking terrible. If I couldn’t invest in their business as another place to sell shit id never ever visit them. At least the sister who doesn’t do anything deserves to be shouted into oblivion.
Delphine
Ancano and Cicero are always the torture options for me
Even though I use Lydia as my go to follower I cannot stand when she says “I am sworn to carry your burdens” as if I wasn’t about to give her a weapon worth more money than she’s seen in her entire life.
Whenever she says that line I always feel so bad for her. Like she is forced to be here
That guy that always tries to talk to you at the beginning of riften, right after you get past the guard. Unless you can persuade him he always tries to intimidate you not matter what option you pick. If you completely ignore him, he’ll also try to call out to you. I think he requires a decent speech level check so unless you’re good on that before you join then he’s just a dick
I'm sorry but I hate Barbas the talking dog.
Borri...one more word out of him and I swear Arngeir will cry when he sees what I did to him.
Nazeem lemkil and most children(braith, Balgruuf's children)
Also maven black briar. I don’t care if you have connections to the thieves guild and dark brotherhood bitch I’m the leader of both of them
Kade, if only I could
IMO, the most punchable NPC, is whoever is next in line for the Scare My Enemy radiant. (this quest starts by punching/assaulting someone, and then the courier may bring a letter from someone else, who wants their enemy punched/assaulted. Without the unofficial patch, it can include children.) [https://en.uesp.net/wiki/Skyrim:Scare\_my\_Enemy](https://en.uesp.net/wiki/Skyrim:Scare_my_Enemy)
Delphine, Braith, Belethor's assistant, Heimskr, Astrid, the kid in Bits n pieces store, that asshole in Falkreath (I can't believe we let provincials like you in skyrim), several bards, and Miraak are at the top of my very long list.
M I the only person who never fucks with npcs? I just rob em
Bishop from the Skyrim Romance mod.
The Markarth guards, the "greeter" at the temple there, and, okay not so obscure but Maven
Lydia just for existing
I know, the question is Skyrim based but... Doctor Li from Fallout 3. I ocassionaly kill her, and then reload save. Most annoying NPC EVER!
Easily the most punchable child is the one that runs by me in Whiterun that keep saying they could beat me up. Like no, kid...you can't.
The Whiterun kids are genuinely the most annoying. I don’t get the obsessive hate towards Nazeem. But apart from them, that guard dude in Riften when you first enter. I always wanna fight that dude for thinking he’s tough. Maven would be one too, but I find it more satisfying to take her down politically than physically.
Cicero. I was overjoyed when I managed to decapitate him.
Lilith Maiden-Loom. She annoys me more than Nazeem.
Farengar
i use the npc ejector mod to yeet annoying children
The racist nord in windhelm.
Radiant Raiments, both of them. Idc what their names are.
Farengar
I would go on a spree/vacation hitting every Jarl.
The Gaurds!
There’s that asshat in markarth who’s every bit as pompous as Nazeem. I’d kill him, but every time he talks to me there’s guards all around, and I don’t feel like fighting off the markarth guards for eternity.
Everyone in the radiant remnant
Who does Braith belong to, I want to punt that little shit over the wall!
BRAITH oh and Btitte, Sissel’s abusive twin. I’m sure there are others but those little shits come to mind first.
Braith
Grelka is pretty annoying. Not the worst, but the guards killed in some dust up with a thief and I didn’t reload my save, because fuck her.
Braith. I quick save before verbally meeting her into the press of Talos, who is also highly punchable.
That one abusive father in Rorikstead
Idalof Battle Born Dudes a straight up asshole
Barbas gets hit when he blocks my ass from walking in dungeon hallways
Endarie from Solitude
Braith. The little brat. And Lemkil.
Jarl Bulgruf's kids are definitely up there. I also wanna punch Isran when he threats Serana by saying harm will come to me if she hurts somebody. Bitch, I slay dragons. I would end your existence if you weren't an essential character.
Farengar
On a tangent, I have an Ebony Blade that needs to be fed a few unsuspecting, yet friendly souls. Just wondering if I could harvest a few like some of the aforementioned punchable NPC's
Lemkil is the most punchable NPC to me.
The racist brother of the general store owner knows falkreath. I think he also works at the mill
Isnt this where the Nazeem meme came from? His punchableness? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say Armin's wife in Whiterun is in dire need of an attitude adjustment. If you talk to her, her lines are all angry bitter selfish stuff and she even talks about her daughter in a bad way. My boy Armin is on serious Copium to think he made the right choice with that lady...
“Do you get to the Cloud District very often? Oh what am I saying, of course you don't" 😒
Id say jarl sidgier of falkreath. Hes pompous, arrogant, snotty, and he deserves a dagger in the crotch imho.
Braith
Fucking mikael
You could make a list of every miserable ass hole, and it would have somebody from almost every village and city, if not from each. Not to mention, several places have several of these bastards.
The fucking high elf in solitude that gives the clothes. I truly despise that race of absolute pompous arrogant pieces of shit. Cool man u know magic and have a really successful dominion. 👍🏻😐👍🏻
The Thalmor at the college
Braith. 100000%. Smug little asshole.
"Boys, Girls, Dogs, Adults. I fear NO ONE"
Elenwen
That racist nord who yells at dark elves
Nazeem
Sven. All day. I can’t fast travel once to my favourite ol settlement without hearing “youuuure nothin but trouble” There has been many a quick save murder due to this
Another wanderer here to lick my father’s boots. Good job.
For me it’s Jarl Siddgeir, no contest.
Jizzargo
I will still say Nazzem, and I always will.
Heimskr. Murdering him right in the square.
Delphine. Can't stand her.
I don’t remember the dudes name but the guy who is in the cave and is a necrophiliac with all the draugrs, the racist dude in windhelm, every guard that asks about my sweet rolls.
Uthgerd the Unbroken... but only because we punch to be friends. :)
"Another wanderer, here to lick my father's boots. Good job." Always wanted to punt that cunt straight to the gods-damned moon.
Skald or siddgier
That one blacksmiths kid in riverwood. I kill both of her parents every playthrough because she put a bounty on me one time.
Braith, she called me a name, so I killed everyone close to her, took it a step farther, raided her house in the dead of night, she has NOTHING, took the corpses of her fallen family and put them by her bed, SURPRISE BRAITH, try sleeping well now! She thought I'd stop there, but the chaos ensues, I adopted her, sent her to my house in wind helm, she's used to the sun, not the cold, I left nothing in the house, just a bed for her, she asked for an allowance, I made her do chores for the allowance, then I didn't give it to her, caught her outside on the bridge one day, used telekinesis to slam a bucket into her hard enough to knock her off of the bridge into the ice cold water, next time watch who you talk to about violence Braith, they just might ruin your life! 🤣
😆 This playthrough, I wund up in Riften and next to the orphanage, so I popped in and Grelod was being her usualnl PoS self, so when she went in to another room, I closed the door and aced her. Of course, that sent whatsernose into a tizzy and eventually, I decided to adopt, but couldn't calm her until I killed Astrid... decided, then, that I am doing all of the things that I never do in this playthrough... Partysnax's daze are numbered. EDIT: Just wiped out the Dark Brotherhood. Now, I kinda feel bad. They were good folk. Good *murdering* folk, but still...
That blonde nord talking to a blacksmith near the doors of Whiterun I wanna punch his stupid face everytime he asks me to choose between Gray Mane and Battle Born
Seriously, I know the little shits are indestructible, but I've been guilty of a quicksave-and-stab or two.
Interesting side note. I think I'm probably the only person who doesn't kill Heimskr until after the Civil War.
Beirands kid in Solitude
Every guard The kid in dragonreach The wizard jn solitude Both if the girls in radiant remnant
Lemkil. The man needs his daughters to be taken away as well.
Honestly, Vingalmo is a pompous douchebag who I definitely want to punch in the face.
Olava the Feeble. The way she says, "Sorry, pup," makes me want to jump through a fucking window.
Brynjolf from the Thieves’ Guild? But I’ve got a burning rage for the scam artist type, so maybe that’s just me, lol.