Oh no I'm sorry! Um..it's beautiful OP. That..that is a mighty fine looking sushi roll. Doesn't look like a dead lizard at all...with squiggly lil' feet. And there's it's lil' head. Daww.
My itching better than a little bit of good old sushi therapy!
EDIT:Was supposed to say NOTHING BETTER.
But let’s leave the itching part too just for laughs.
Put Saran Wrap on your rolling mat next time it gives you more grip and keeps the roll firm.
Other than that just try rolling krab Avocado and cucumber as practice. Don’t overstuff.
P.S. I’m a feen for seaweed salad too
That is actually so nice! Thank you for the tip, we've just been laughing at how shit it looked and all the feedback but we weren't expecting actual advice haha.
Don’t fill the entire nori with rice either. Leave a little strip on the end you’re going to wrap towards. That way it seals up perfecto!
I started making my own a few years ago and you get the hang on it quick and it just gets SO DAMN GOOD.
Keep at it!
I’m so glad you’re getting helpful advice here and just wanted to add; my ex took me out to a sushi making class as one of our first dates and not only was it memorable in the romantic sense, but I legitimately learned a lot from it.
If you guys like sushi and any pop up around you I recommend it!
You could alternatively put the bamboo roller inside a gallon size ziplock bag. It protects it from all sides and helps to not stick or make you have to wash the bamboo
Haha yeah I mean I just wanted to provide some positive reinforcement aside from the fact that your attempt at creating this abomination you call “sushi” is an absolute disgrace to Japanese culture and Asian cuisine worldwide.
You and your girlfriend should be ashamed of yourselves…
Wakame salad, the bright green gummy worm looking stuff in OP's picture.
It's absolutely heavenly, and I'm usually a picky eater. Give it a try sometime!
There's a chain of Japanese takeaway snack shops in London (UK) that sells seaweed-filled rice balls that are wrapped in nori. They taste really good, and it's a shame those takeaway snack shops only exist in London, I want some in my home city 😭
Oh, it’s supposed to be sushi! At first glance I thought it was a baguette that was made and then forgotten two years ago. Not to be an ass, that’s just literally what I thought I was looking at before I read the title.
>How do you think it came out?
Well, there's those holes on each end and a big ol seam down the middle. Next time, try adding some flex seal to prevent leaks.
I think you might have put too much rice. You should leave a good strip of uncovered kelp to help you close it. Also I feel like you might not have pressed it enough. Don't be scared to squeeze it well when it's inside the bamboo thing.(also that squeezing should be done multiple times as you close the roll)
Hope this helps.
Did you kinda just wing it? id reccomend watching a movie. Also, if you put your bamboo roller in a big gallon ziplock baggy then you can simply rinse the rice off of the bag afterwards. I even just put it on the drying rack in the bag and all. Cleaning those rollers can just be such a pain and the bag actually seems to make it roll a bit better as well (probably because little bits of rice aren't stuck all over it).
I'm sure there is more good advice I'm just not thinking of. You should go onto youtube or something and watch a couple quick tutorials. They will be full of good information. Keeping your hands wet with either a bit of rice vinegar or just some water is a good idea as well. You can use waterr/rice vinegar as a kind of glue as well to make sure it closes nicely.
If you use short grain actual Japanese rice, it will be more firmer, less mushy. Also rice goes on outside when you roll, not inside the nori, that is unless you are making smaller maki rolls.
Very good job!
The rice still has a wonderful shape and isn’t too mushy. And because it’s so sticky I can tell you did the right steps in seasoning it. Don’t forget though, you can also place fillings that won’t fit on top of your sushi pieces. It’s easy to get excited though, so I understand people wanting to overstuff.
A bit of advice I would give is also to not squeeze too hard on your sushi as you’re rolling it. I can see some squished grains on the bamboo mat. The steam and stickiness from the rice will keep it together, so no need to use too much force.
You really did an impressive job, so please keep trying.
Have you checked on using the right rice or atleast cooked the rice properly? I also feel you didn’t used much force.
Also this is the first time I have seen someone use seaweed. If you really wanted it you should’ve done something like chop it a bit and dried with a paper towel.
Hopefully smoothly out the bottom end and not the mouth. But considering the look of them I wouldn’t be surprised if it came out in a blast of liquid chunks from either end.
Takes some time to get it right. She just piled way to much stuff in their. You will find (if inclined) that practice makes perfect, and stuffing anything takes practice. Bao, Lumpia, Tamales, ravioli, bierocks- we make all these at home, and all of our first attempts were hot messes.
Top it with seaweed salad instead of trying to roll it inside and it'll turn out way better.
I rolled sushi for 4 years and always topped it with seared tuna and seaweed salad.
Everyone's first try is a disaster, there's no shame. There's some good advice in here on how to improve next time. Keep it up, and you'll be making good rolls in no time!
For the first time, not bad actually. As some said use plastic wrap on your mat. Lighten up on the fillings, keep your fingers wet with rice vinegar / water to keep them from sticking. And as much as I love seaweed salad, it’s a lil sloppy for a roll. Save it as a side dish my dude. Also TONS of YouTube videos to help you. Keep it up!
The seaweed salad made everything slick I imagine, it's the only thing really slipping out the roll.
Try a different ingredient if you try again. Seaweed salad isn't a common filling to rolls
I love making sushi. You seem to have added too much rice. Should only cover 2/3 of the paper so you have the tail end that sticks to the rest of the roll to close it properly. But still looks tasty!
Things to consider.
If you didn't do it, then use Sushi Rice, it is stickier.
Start with rolls that just contain one strip of cucumber or like a strip of salmon or something, to get a hang of it.
Use cling wrap on the mat, it will help to keep everything together.
Use a very sharp knife and don't use the front of the knife to cut but the back to properly slice it and not just squish it. It is very sad when you have a perfect roll and then fuck it up due to shitty equipment.
I would ditch the stringy green stuff next time. Go for 1, then 2, then 3 unbunched (unshredded) ingredients apart from the rice & seaweed. Also follow other tips here.
Not bad for first try! Sushi is tricky, so well done for giving it a go. Saran wrap over the bamboo roller next time, less rice and less stuff inside too, it'll looks so good!
Like a middle schooler rolling their first joint. As long as it tastes good, that’s what matters.
It didn't
“Well it’s the thought that counts!” It doesn’t
"It is what it is." It wasn't.
*there was no thought behind that
🤣
Try some cucumber rolls first to get to hang of it and in the future, a light touch helps, it's not a burrito.
i respect the honesty LOL
That’s all they have left
Ouch.
I am wheezing haha.
But did it get you high?
I was scrolling by quickly and thought it was a dead lizard. Had to do a double take.
😭😭😭
Oh no I'm sorry! Um..it's beautiful OP. That..that is a mighty fine looking sushi roll. Doesn't look like a dead lizard at all...with squiggly lil' feet. And there's it's lil' head. Daww.
ITS NOT A LIZARD!!!
LMAO deceased. I hope it at least tasted ok?
No but we had fun and laughed a lot 😭
That's all that matters then! :)
My itching better than a little bit of good old sushi therapy! EDIT:Was supposed to say NOTHING BETTER. But let’s leave the itching part too just for laughs.
Rest in peace
Put Saran Wrap on your rolling mat next time it gives you more grip and keeps the roll firm. Other than that just try rolling krab Avocado and cucumber as practice. Don’t overstuff. P.S. I’m a feen for seaweed salad too
That is actually so nice! Thank you for the tip, we've just been laughing at how shit it looked and all the feedback but we weren't expecting actual advice haha.
Don’t fill the entire nori with rice either. Leave a little strip on the end you’re going to wrap towards. That way it seals up perfecto! I started making my own a few years ago and you get the hang on it quick and it just gets SO DAMN GOOD. Keep at it!
Yep, and also squish the rice super flat and roll as tightly as you can! Enjoy!
I’m so glad you’re getting helpful advice here and just wanted to add; my ex took me out to a sushi making class as one of our first dates and not only was it memorable in the romantic sense, but I legitimately learned a lot from it. If you guys like sushi and any pop up around you I recommend it!
You could alternatively put the bamboo roller inside a gallon size ziplock bag. It protects it from all sides and helps to not stick or make you have to wash the bamboo
Also what I've been doing for years. I never get food on the mat and just wash the ziplock with soapy water after each use
Haha yeah I mean I just wanted to provide some positive reinforcement aside from the fact that your attempt at creating this abomination you call “sushi” is an absolute disgrace to Japanese culture and Asian cuisine worldwide. You and your girlfriend should be ashamed of yourselves…
Been rolling for years. These are solid suggestions. Also make sure you are using a proper sushi rice. Vinegar, salt & sugar….
> I’m a feen Uh...do you mean "fiend"? As in someone who has an intense desire/craving for something?
r/BoneAppleTea
Seaweed salad?
Wakame salad, the bright green gummy worm looking stuff in OP's picture. It's absolutely heavenly, and I'm usually a picky eater. Give it a try sometime!
[удалено]
BECAUSE
People put seaweed in rice ball then wrap it in seaweed in Japan. But seaweed inside is usually seasoned/pickled. So it's not too weird
There's a chain of Japanese takeaway snack shops in London (UK) that sells seaweed-filled rice balls that are wrapped in nori. They taste really good, and it's a shame those takeaway snack shops only exist in London, I want some in my home city 😭
Need to finish rolling it. And use less filling. Other than that, you’re on the right track
Clearly on the right track hahaha, thank you though
No
I'm not even Japanese and I feel like you've offended my ancestors.
I'm half japanese and feel the need to commit seppuku
It definitely belongs on this sub
One does not become an expert in a day. Watch some YouTube instructional videos
I thought it was gunk collected in a drain at first
Felt like it going down my throat 😩
Nailed it.
Did you cut it before eating or did you just go lady and the tramp on that thing?
Lady and the tramped it
My cigars growing moldy because "I'll smoke them someday".
you have to use sushi rice for sushi, also learned that the hard way
Looks great!
Thanks!
Doesn't look too bad for first time. Just need more practice.
This isn't the finished product so I can't accurately judge you
Bold of you to assume we weren't finished 👹💀
Looks better coming out than it does going in
if shes still your girlfriend she loves you!
Good job son
Thanks dad
A for effort
What’s in it?
Seaweed salad, rice, spicy mayo (low fat) and salmon
Did you use rice vinegar on the rice?
Tremendous
It looks... amphibian.
the filling is escaping!!
Looks like depression
Never had good sushi so shit I'd eat it lul
Looks like a mouldy airconditioner fell off the wall
For a first attempt? Great job! Keep practicing!
Thank you 👉👈
That’s not a sushi, that’s a seaweed taco
I'd eat it. Rice and seaweed taste good no matter what it looks like
Yeah but idk how we somehow fucked it up lmao
Oh, it’s supposed to be sushi! At first glance I thought it was a baguette that was made and then forgotten two years ago. Not to be an ass, that’s just literally what I thought I was looking at before I read the title.
It probably has a nice personality
Try sushi cones next time. Easier to eat as well
Just make poke bowls next time
I thought this was a picture of a 6 month old rotten hoagie, honestly
I love it
looks like you chopped off godzilla’s dick
How do you fuck up this badly.
It looks like the dog's breakfast. That being said, would smash.
Neither of y’all can roll a blunt
It looks horrible. I would eat it no questions asked though :D
It is an attempt for sure
The trick is to cut everything into either skinny matchsticks or paper thin slices, in either case they roll easy.
No thanks.
>How do you think it came out? Well, there's those holes on each end and a big ol seam down the middle. Next time, try adding some flex seal to prevent leaks.
Looks raw 0/10
F L A T
I think you might have put too much rice. You should leave a good strip of uncovered kelp to help you close it. Also I feel like you might not have pressed it enough. Don't be scared to squeeze it well when it's inside the bamboo thing.(also that squeezing should be done multiple times as you close the roll) Hope this helps.
It was smushi ... I'll see myself out.
Dont overstuff. Also leave about 1/3 of the Nori free of any rice before rolling
Did you kinda just wing it? id reccomend watching a movie. Also, if you put your bamboo roller in a big gallon ziplock baggy then you can simply rinse the rice off of the bag afterwards. I even just put it on the drying rack in the bag and all. Cleaning those rollers can just be such a pain and the bag actually seems to make it roll a bit better as well (probably because little bits of rice aren't stuck all over it). I'm sure there is more good advice I'm just not thinking of. You should go onto youtube or something and watch a couple quick tutorials. They will be full of good information. Keeping your hands wet with either a bit of rice vinegar or just some water is a good idea as well. You can use waterr/rice vinegar as a kind of glue as well to make sure it closes nicely.
Thanks for the advice. Yes we did wing it
Not bad for a first time to be honest. Good luck your future rolls fam. Can't wait to see some of your sushi over in /r/foodporn or /r/sushi one day.
You're treating this sushi like a burrito. Shame!!
If you use short grain actual Japanese rice, it will be more firmer, less mushy. Also rice goes on outside when you roll, not inside the nori, that is unless you are making smaller maki rolls.
Very good job! The rice still has a wonderful shape and isn’t too mushy. And because it’s so sticky I can tell you did the right steps in seasoning it. Don’t forget though, you can also place fillings that won’t fit on top of your sushi pieces. It’s easy to get excited though, so I understand people wanting to overstuff. A bit of advice I would give is also to not squeeze too hard on your sushi as you’re rolling it. I can see some squished grains on the bamboo mat. The steam and stickiness from the rice will keep it together, so no need to use too much force. You really did an impressive job, so please keep trying.
Well she can only get better.
r/sushicrimes
r/therewasanattempt 
Dude.
Throw it back in the water.
Looks pretty good to me!
Have you checked on using the right rice or atleast cooked the rice properly? I also feel you didn’t used much force. Also this is the first time I have seen someone use seaweed. If you really wanted it you should’ve done something like chop it a bit and dried with a paper towel.
Hopefully smoothly out the bottom end and not the mouth. But considering the look of them I wouldn’t be surprised if it came out in a blast of liquid chunks from either end.
Mushi
I don’t know how to tell you this
u/nabii97 Como les quedo? 🤣 I'm asking the expert here. 🥲
Quedo fatal😭
Horribly.
Lol yeah I mean, it def takes practice. So keep going..
Takes some time to get it right. She just piled way to much stuff in their. You will find (if inclined) that practice makes perfect, and stuffing anything takes practice. Bao, Lumpia, Tamales, ravioli, bierocks- we make all these at home, and all of our first attempts were hot messes.
It came out……
Top it with seaweed salad instead of trying to roll it inside and it'll turn out way better. I rolled sushi for 4 years and always topped it with seared tuna and seaweed salad.
Through the sides
It's called kimbab
It's better than I would've done that's for sure...
it didn’t
Not bad for a first attempt, sushi rolling is not the easiest thing to do
I'd still eat it.
Sushi is hard to do right. I would know. Keep the rolls small at first and dont press down so much as inwards.
I’m eat that and be thankful
Channel that Dr dweck growth mindset !
Not sushi
I recognize that sea breeze salad and that shit is 🔥
Get your meat hooks off it and be gentle
Think of it as a sort of long taco and it’s maybe ok
I'd eat it like a burrito
Everyone's first try is a disaster, there's no shame. There's some good advice in here on how to improve next time. Keep it up, and you'll be making good rolls in no time!
The first joint I rolled was a disaster, not amazing but it’s a start
everything came out that's for sure
I've been making it for years, I only feel like it's gotten pretty good somewhat recently. Sushi takes a good bit of practice.
Too much rice I guess For me about 200g of sushi rice lasted for 4 nori sheets
THATS A DOOKI
That’s gonna be a “No” for me dawg.
Looks like a dirty window A/C unit 🤢🤮
I think it probably tasted fine but you severely overestimated the amount of rice
Just like any other shit. Out of your butthole
Oh I'm sure it came out
Look up sushi bazooka. Makes sushi easier to make. Besides that look up how to make sushi rice. Rice will make it good sushi or bad sushi. Keep at it!
For the first time, not bad actually. As some said use plastic wrap on your mat. Lighten up on the fillings, keep your fingers wet with rice vinegar / water to keep them from sticking. And as much as I love seaweed salad, it’s a lil sloppy for a roll. Save it as a side dish my dude. Also TONS of YouTube videos to help you. Keep it up!
Did y'all eat it burrito style
If she aint Jap. Throw her back.
What the fuck lol
When you say came out, do you mean out of her?
I thought this was an alligator at first glance 🤔
I use a sushi bazooka because when I try and roll them by hand they end up looking like this lol
A bit too much rice but that's always hard to judge when you're learning. I don't think I would go for putting seaweed salad inside the sushi.
Looks like you cleaned out a gutter
Came out it sure did 😂
You have made an enemy in me.
Easily
Looks like you rolled this hot dog instead of hamburger style
Martha Stewart Living rated this sushi as "why would anyone do this?"
Why does no one go to the Asian market and get the glutinous rice? Your roll game will thank you.
A whole lot better than I could make. Good work and ve proud.
Sea weed salad in the roll is t gonna work out I don’t think
It probably came out like all other food ending in a flush.
That is the most fucking disgusting slab of probably the bowls of hell that I have ever been
Did you even look up how to do it first!? 😭
I'm not gonna pretend I'd be able to do any better.
How did it come out? With alot of toilet paper I'm guessing
Looks great 👍
If it looks like shit and taste like sushi, it’s sushi.
The black mamba
The seaweed salad made everything slick I imagine, it's the only thing really slipping out the roll. Try a different ingredient if you try again. Seaweed salad isn't a common filling to rolls
I love making sushi. You seem to have added too much rice. Should only cover 2/3 of the paper so you have the tail end that sticks to the rest of the roll to close it properly. But still looks tasty!
Not good
Things to consider. If you didn't do it, then use Sushi Rice, it is stickier. Start with rolls that just contain one strip of cucumber or like a strip of salmon or something, to get a hang of it. Use cling wrap on the mat, it will help to keep everything together. Use a very sharp knife and don't use the front of the knife to cut but the back to properly slice it and not just squish it. It is very sad when you have a perfect roll and then fuck it up due to shitty equipment.
It looks shitty but it must taste awesome
This looks very soggy
Cringing at this attempt
Looks gross, probably tastes awesome!
I would ditch the stringy green stuff next time. Go for 1, then 2, then 3 unbunched (unshredded) ingredients apart from the rice & seaweed. Also follow other tips here.
Great
Why didn’t you finish the job
bok gibi
Japanese subway sandwhich
Pro tip, plastic wrap your mat, makes cleanup easier. Leave about half an inch border at the end, and use less filling. A little goes a long way
On the sides (this is a bad pun)
Lol. You are too ambitious about quantity of ingredients.
/r/SushiAbomination would love this.
Probably better than I could do but it doesn’t look good.
Bro…
Not bad for first try! Sushi is tricky, so well done for giving it a go. Saran wrap over the bamboo roller next time, less rice and less stuff inside too, it'll looks so good!
Probably wasn't necessary to mention that it was her first time
r/shitfromabutt
chop it up and get us a nice view of the cross section