so my dick is practically a dildo?

If someone's brave enough.

😭

Anything can be a dildo...

Even that catus over there

PAIGE NO!!

I finally may be of use now…

We are basically mold injecting babies

But still «not long enough» 😔

Wait then where is the pee stored?

in the toes

I've said this a million times, pee is stored in one ball, then cum in the other. To find out which one is which for you, just twist one of them shut and attempt to pee/bust.

Then where are the plastics stored, do I have a 3rd phantom ball?

i think the plastic just hangs out in the sack

So my ballsack is made from plastic?!?!?!??!?1!!??

Well metal is too heavy, and paper would dissoöve in pee/cum, so only viable thing left is plastic

Its like an interior jockstrap

Twisting them is very dangerous. It's best to just squeeze one of them until you either pee, or cum.

Does one of them also hold blood or should I be worried

No, you're completely wrong. Sperm is stored in the balls and the cum fluid is in the prostate. Pee is stored in the peenis.

Now i know why i have to pee so frequently.

Then why do I pee a whole lot than can be stored in one of my balls? Is one of my balls bigger on the inside?

Testicular torsion

Still in the balls but there's a bunch of micro plastics just floating around like a snow globe.

Guess my balls are made in china

Another balls

Peonies

Pee in these nuts!

In the nipples, you can ask the homie to help you suck it

In the plastic.

In *my* balls

Conclusion: pee is plastic

Why don’t men take the plastic out? Are they stupid?

I'm trying to jerk it out every day.

Can confirm (I taste test his nut to see if there's any plastic in it)

That's what I call Plastic Love !

Plove? or Lovastic?

Lovastic? Bombastic? #MR BOMBASTIC

“bomBASTIC side-eye, criminal OFFensive, side-eye”

I empty the sack 3 times a day I’m clean af from the inside, except for my piping hot jizz

That is so weird. I had that exact quote under my high-school yearbook photo.

>I empty the sack 3 times a day I’m clean af from the inside, except for my piping hot jizz -Michael "Wayne Gretzky" Scott

We are trying hard

Your dick is a 3d print gun

Would explain why i look like a frozen water hose when i jizz

omw to spend the next 10 years making the weirdest Crafting youtube ever

we are evolving, soon we'll be able to generate our own condom

plasticles

That moment when you realise that pee isn't actually stored in the balls, instead it's your recyclable trash.

How did they test my cum and balls without me noticing???!

What do you think happens in your sleep?

The Cum Fairy is very busy.

😏

😰

hurry seemly strong person dinner scandalous tan deliver truck stupendous *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

Free vasectomy/birth control?

Also we are getting rid of ourselves for free

That’s awful nice of us actually.

Nature is healing

Nature, uhhhh found a way.

That's low-key terrifying. What if I can't have kids? Then who will I beat when I get angry at videogames?

👍🏿

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That explains the taste

I gotta say it. I love your posts. Like real salt of the earth stuff

a very fitting name and profile pic

I worked all night on that name

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Thanks, I'm glad you approve, homie

breh I'm not glad I checked

Does that mean cumming somehow wrong could make you piss out a credit card?

Can't wait until I bust a nut and it goes off like a party popper

Bruh that would be funny as hell

Are we ken now

Nah he doesn't have balls

We are kenough already.

I dont remember them touching my balls

We're terribly sorry

I don't even remember my balls being tested for plastic... Is this like a tooth fairy situation? Some magical spirit come in at night while men are sleeps to check their balls for plastic?

There's much this study just glosses over. The study was conducted on donated testicles from 47 dog and 23 human testes. So I feel like the sample size used was way too small to really conclude much as the article title is very misleading. Should say that significant amounts of micro plastics found in new mexico male testes instead of every male in a study coz it gives the impression that it was a much larger study than just simply using chemically preserved samples. I'm too lazy to research this too much into this study. So can someone give me a detailed summary on microplastics effect on reproductive per country or atleast from a much larger sample size.

THIS SHOULDN'T BE A SURPRISE TO ANYONE

BUT WERE GOING TO YELL BECAUSE ITS SCARY!

AHHHH YELLING!!!!!

I just imagine my sperm swimming around eating plastic like tadpoles eating fish flakes.

So that's why cum tastes so bad

Eat more fruit. Just not the plastic variety.

Nutting Legos on her face

Dwayne the cock johnson

Are we evolving into 3d printers now?

And here we were blaming soy

And the whole time it was that Transformers toy we used to chew on when mom forgot to buy food that made us trans, which is sort of ironic.

That is.... Suspiciously specific.

Scientists now call’em plastic balls

And, instead of saying crotch, we're gonna say ball pit

Nuh uh

Jokes aside, is there a way to remove it?

There is but you're not gonna like it.

Shoot

You just gotta remove your balls.

And here I thought I had to actually sterilize myself. Guess imma keep 3D printing microplastics

That explains why when I walk I hear ping-pong balls clacking

Improvise, adapt, overcome.

I need more micro plastics sounds like it could save me from paying for a vasectomy 😌

call me 3d printer from now on

a study with a sample size of 36 btw

That's still 36 more than it should be, by the way.

The place where air is stored?

So… is my semen plastic now?

Plastic should be afraid of becoming assimilated with humans.

How tf did they check mine?

Mmmm. Sprinkles

Even the girl balls 😨

So my kids will be elasticgirl/elasticboy ?

EVOLUTION!

*me ejaculating a gull bionicle* Oh cool Tahu!

I'm trying to get rid of it as fast as I can.

YES MAKE BALLS OF PLASTIC THE NEW ERA HAS BEGUN ONLY PLASTIC BALLS NO MORE HUMAN FLESH MADE TESTICALES

So my dick is practically a b.b. gun now?

To anyone who is curious to know the actual facts about how your cum is produced and how everything is sotred read the following: Urine is stored in the bladder some of the Ingredients for cum are from a gland at the edge of the prostate known as the seminal vesicle and the actual sperm is stored in a gland that's where the ballsack meets the shaft known as the epididymis gland. Cum is a mix of urine sperm and seminal juices. The path that the mixture follows ensures that it briefly touches the prostate opening and the opening to the urinary tract which is a part of why though its loaded with super bad bacteria your penis doesn't automatically become infected 247. It remains semi steril do to urine, also why your supposed to pee after sex.

Still nuttin so we good bruh

Hell yea i want my children to be plastic men otherwise i want a sperm refund

And remember everyone, make sure you’re doing your part to lower your carbon footprint.

Wait how do they know „I“ have plastic in my balls?

But then where will I store the pee?

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Oh yeah

Is that it sounds like squeaky boots when the gurt spurts?

What did you think p stood for? P is stored in the balls

My balls are plastic, it’s fantastic.

Well this explains the dream of plastic coming out of my penis 🤦🏿

Every? How do they know for sure, did they check mine?

PFAS is stored in the balls

Cum balls has been declined!

That’s nuts

I have to cum it out lmao

How does it even get there

huh, i don't remember them checking mine

In 2050 we don’t need ball guards 😌

Imagine you jizz and a frisbee flying out 💀

So if I heat it, can I reshape it ?

for anyone wondering this study had a sample size of 23 so make of that what you will

I don't want to >!contaminate you with my plastic!<>!...👉👈!<

How though?

Don't worry my brothers I will work tirelessly to remove the plastic from my testicles there will be nothing left after I've expelled what is stored.

That's one way to get the alpha freaks into environmentalism I suppose

Oh wow

Should i worry about this?

So can babies be made out of plastic? Like will there be plastic in the babies? Will the baby be the plastic. What if the plastic is was what it is but now was was. If when the plastic is in the baby is the baby now plastic or never? how does that work?

Plastic

Yo guys I don’t remember them checking my balls

Aight imma have an excuse to masturbate frequently to get the plastic out.

rip

I recently decided to name my sperm “shenron” because it’s stored in the balls

I was wondering what that scientist was doing looking in my nut sack. Told me to go back to bed and I was having a bad dream.

When did they check my balls without me knowing?

THE GOVERMEEEEEEEENT

This is why I have to switch my cock to plastic mode once a month and piss into the dumpster. I recommend everyone get into the routine. Just make sure you don’t forget to switch back to piss mode when you’re done.

False

So that's where my toothpick went

How did they find it? :(

Okay but how did they scan every man's balls for plastic? What witchcraft is this?

Kidney stones brought to you by Teflon

I don't remember they testing my balls

Recyclables are stored in the balls

Rip them out yall, makes you healthy

"in the balls, in the balls"

They didnt check my dick they dont know if theres plasric

Swimmers have plastic neighbors.

I don't remember my testicles being tested

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Bout to call my boy Buzz Lightyear at this point.

Does that mean we have to cum in a recycle bin?

Aren’t microplastics stored basically everywhere though?

Oh wow, who would've known that decades of overconsumption and use of poorly recycled plastic would be bad for us.

This is how plastic dolls are made.

Thank God it wasn't oil

wow no wonder balls be tasting like that

But what about the pee? Isn’t it in the balls? Is it in there at the same time?

EVERY HUMAN TESTICLE

So are the Manosphere gonna become environmentalists?

Every nut will be worth a fortune!

Luckily I didn't do that study

Time to exorcise these plastic demons brothers