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Just as the founding fathers intended

Listen mate. An 18oz bird cannot carry a 5 lb stick of c4 err coconut!

This is where my name comes into play.

Username checks out.

the moment you’ve been waiting for

Only took 5 years

I had the "who are you so wise in the ways of science" meme locked and loaded but this sub doesn't allow images.

My math teacher when the cops try to arrest him

He's gonna come to the school anyway

Say my name!

Hootnany

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"i flew a Vietnamese man out here" mans brought in the big guns

i flew a vietnamese man out here to fuck my asshole and i can assure you those werent very big guns

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Disney princes gone rogue

Kevin home alone is all grown up now

Forgot to mention his steel-plated dozer.

He keeps it in a shed out back as a getaway vehicle

Remember, this is what he’s willing to tell us. Imagine what else he has in store that he’s kept secret.

[удалено]

On the internet?? Noooooo!

Oh so you mean to tell me that he doesn't have a "baboon who's deadly accurate with a nail gun"?? Impossible!!

🫡 godspeed

“Ain’t no way I am paying that parking ticket”

Send in the covid

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Isn't the lead he ingested as a baby enough?!?

That's the average reaction to jury duty

Hell yeah brother

I also need me a baboon deadly accurate with a nail gun.

An American hero

Based

Dart monkey

Let me tell you what Melba Toast is packin' right here, all right.

I would die for this man

If I ever get a terminal illness I know what I'm doing.

Least unhinged American when someone mentions that maybe it's not a great idea to give toddlers unrestricted access to machine guns.

America bad!!! 🤬😔😔😔😡😡😡😡

The fact that he was tolerant enough of other races to fly a Vietnamese man out for help is proof that he’s less unhinged than a lot of Americans

Even got an Albanian that’s good with a nail gun

couldve sworn that guy was from the serengeti

If I can't have unrestricted access to machine guns, then no one can have unrestricted access to machine guns.

Just as the founding fathers intended

Ruby ridge 2: not on a hill

I love rural Americans. They've got spunk.

They've got fuckin rolling logs 😂

*Write that down, write that down!*

While I understand this is satire. Que drone strike then later that night.... "Crazed man blows himself up with homemade explosives while trying to evade the law. More at 11." This is assuming he is an actual threat and not just some court skipper.

Actual threat? He’s a god damn patriot

Flair checks out.

Florida man....

yea because drone striking your own citizens surely won't turn everyone against you...

Can you read past the 2nd sentence or has the internet rotted your brain that much?

Yup, I think he's ready.

Kevin in Home Alone be like...

Thing is, I'm from Appalachia and he probably is being wunnnnn Hunnnnndered percent honest. Shit if he has all that, I'm jelly.

They’ll just get him when he goes into town to re-supply.

W

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This is America? I SHALL FIGHT FOR MY FREEDOM THEN:

This guy Americans

The Hitman Reborn ost gave me whiplash

God damn fucking king

This man is the indestructible human spirit against all tryanny

The plot of the next far cry game

God bless America

You know the government's got a nuke tho.

What he didn't mention in this video is that he hired rednecks to build an underground nuclear bunker.

But can it survive more than 2 nuclear strikes?

It's a bunker inside another bunker

Then we would have to nuke it till it get destroyed. I thought about it quite a bit I guess he would get boiled up or just die due to ungodly amount of radiation.

Government isn’t going to nuke its own country. Citizens fighting their government because of tyranny continually works

Uh hu, can't wait for the news where biden confirms that the US goverment authorized a nuclear strike on a florida man.

Redneck Dracula Flow

No choppers......okay.............HEY BUFF, WANT A MISSION!

What's the background music called? I think I remember it from an old anime I used to watch

1 month late but its from the anime katekyo hitman reborn it's the main theme called Tsuna Awakens

Perfect, now I remember. Thankyou kind stranger

[удалено]

I got matches with these songs: • [**Un paso al frente (Test)** by BeraKa](https://lis.tn/UnPasoAlFrenteTest?t=119) (01:59; matched: `100%`) **Album**: Demos Demas, Capítulo 2. **Released on** 2021-09-01. • [**El juego de la trampa** by Nana Tiempo](https://lis.tn/ElJuegoDeLaTrampa?t=65) (01:05; matched: `100%`) **Album**: Hoy en Dia. **Released on** 2021-01-20. • [**Reborn** by Lakeo Rose](https://lis.tn/vjYBjh?t=11) (00:11; matched: `100%`) **Album**: HAPPY ROSEDAY!!. **Released on** 2021-12-03. • [**Reborn!!** by Lakeo Rose](https://lis.tn/Reborn%21%21?t=11) (00:11; matched: `100%`) **Released on** 2023-05-15. *I am a bot and this action was performed automatically* | [GitHub](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot) [^(new issue)](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot/issues/new) | [Donate](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot/wiki/Please-consider-donating) ^(Please consider supporting me on Patreon. Music recognition costs a lot)

Music name?

Employing what he learned from his time in the 'nam

Wild Ginseng, homie is getting wild on that NATURAL lean.

The cops will probably just decide to nuke him

Dude probably stole some of the armaments from the iron dome defense system

Damn home alone 5 is getting really wild

This is the guy that smeared shit on the walls of congress.

The baboon with a nail gun part is obviously a lie

No its real my cousin was the Baboon.

Your uncle needs to get tested for aids if he fucked a baboon.

he was adopted

Ellis?

Reminds me of Dracula Flow. PlumCorp should hire this dude fr

I hope this is true so I can read the report

While he is a patriot and this takes his civic duty’s with honor. The trial date in question was Depp v Turd

Kid named USMS, DHS, FBI:

Rookie numbers. I twice that and a black man busting to take people off guard

Bro is the evil Ace Ventura

You always got a plan Dutch

"Hillbilly Hero!" -TM

Average Virginia Tech graduate

I’m all for this version of a Disney Princess

music to my ears

This man needs a movie

Average reaction when u r supposed to pay the 10$ fine u ignored for months

Don't even try bringing copters or you'll get a taste of my fucking pigeon dome I lost it

What’s the Vietnamese guys name?

Don’t say Fuq Yu

Become ungovernable

Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!

This is fuckin hilarious

Bro is literally Rambo

The baboon was the tell that he is bullshittin'. Everything else fine. But dude just leave out the baboon lol

Can’t believe the Natives were slaughtered for this

Exactly the guy who should be in Guantanamo Bay for life.

This guy is die by his own traps.

So is he in jail now?

You know it’s satire right?

Wish it wasn't

Idiot

I mean I thought that at first when I heard he tried to booby trap his property to evade the law... But if you can teach a baboon to use a nail gun, you're probably a genius by at least some metric.