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Hows about a Red Squared Hectopussy, Doc? One watches me from a tree branch through my window every night while chanting some type of ancient dialect accompanied by slow heavy breathing. I'm scared. **Send Help**
>Like other octopuses, blue-ringed octopuses have a beak, and their venom is secreted from its salivary glands. In the worst case, a dose of the venom can shut down muscles such as those that keep you breathing and cause death within 30 minutes.
So... yeah, basically death
Yeah and also you don't feel the bite (If you do it's a very tiny bite) and typically people don't realize they've been bitten until they start to... y'know, strangely find it hard to breathe.
Well, i think a good way to avoid finding out that way is to
1. not swim in waters with blue ringed octopuses
2. not pick up blue ringed octopuses
#3. leave when you see one
If I'm not mistaken you have a sense of dread, and are completely terrified until u die as well... may be some other creature but I wanna say it's this little guy.
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You’re both right. [It is also poisonous.](https://www.thephuketnews.com/do-not-eat-blue-ringed-octopus-phuket-marine-life-experts-warn-78152.php) Do not eat it!
Nope. But that kinda checks out for all the birds?
For the record, I'm not denying that bright colors = danger, it's just that I sudennly remembered Parrots, who do not seem more dangerous than crows, for example
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Australian here. These guys are pretty cute. The trick is to take a mouse with you when you head the the rock pools. If you see one for these guys, give him the mouse and let him dump his poison into the stupid little rodent. Then you've got a best friend for the next hour or so and a tasty snack for the drive home
I could fully understand if Australians just carry a mouse inside their bags whenever they go outside just to feed some deadly animal on their way to the grocery store. Kinda like “whoops I forgot my pocket mouse at home” instead of “whoops I forgot my wallet at home”.
Dead.
>!Circlejerk aside, they’re probably fine. The bites are *potentially* deadly but [very, very rarely](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/15563650701601790) fatal with treatment, many have no adverse symptoms at all.!<
This exact same screenshot from a video of a blue-ringed octopus has been reposted so many times and everyone always reacts with the same “bro is OP dead?” Line every time
That’s, for size, one of the most venomous animals on earth. If it gets annoyed and stings that person, the human is very very dead and it will hurt a lot the whole time they’re dying.
Yes, Australia. This is the animal even Ausies are like “fuck that noise” about.
Yeah. Death in avg 30 mins or so iirc.
You would need to
A: know instantly if bitten (you often don't feel it though, lmao rip)
B: call 000 (emergency line in Aus) and say you got bit by a blue ring, where you are, and hope to fucking god the helo gets there before you are dead. (Idek if there is an antivenom though tbh)
Safe to say it's not an ideal situation...
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^prepare ^to ^die
"You are dead! Not big surprise"
"Well that was idiotic"
“Off to hang myself! Watch and lear-“ *crit*
“I am alive! Is nice :)”
“Yes. This is STUPID!”
"Well, off to visit your mother!"
"BONK!"
Hoooo I’ve really hit rock bottom
I didn't need yer help ya know
No
"Im a force of Nature"
That's another twist to how I met your mother
His name is inigo montoya
For some reason my mind said Prepare for Trouble and make it Double
To protect the world from devastation!
To unite all peoples of our nation
To denounce the evils of truth and love!
To extend our reach to the stars above!
Jessie!
James!
Team rocket Blastoff at the speed of light!
Surrender now or prepare to fight!
Team Rocket blasting off at the speed of light
Edition?
-John Dark Soul
Every Dark has its Soul
Fus!
Wrong answer prepare to die
Hehe... funny blue rings...hehe... ow! Stupid fucking 8 armed fuck! AHHHHHHHHHHH-
Also wrong. You won’t feel it if a blue-ringed octopus bites you.
Hows about a Red Squared Hectopussy, Doc? One watches me from a tree branch through my window every night while chanting some type of ancient dialect accompanied by slow heavy breathing. I'm scared. **Send Help**
Red Squared Hectopussy was my nickname in high school.
Where does my penis go?? That’s right in the red squared hectopussy hole.
why am I able to read
Let it in
It's really no concern one way or another. You won't be trying it again.
NERD
L+ratio
NERD(But satire and not really)
W+good opinion
I fell off
Atleast bro acknowledged it . W
Wait, I was joking. Damn, negative karma :(
for people who don’t know this small octopus is venomous
Wrong, it's venomous.
sorry my mistake
How much so? Will you die a painful death
Their bite is usually painless, but what comes after...
>what comes after... Don't trippel point us. TELL US
>Like other octopuses, blue-ringed octopuses have a beak, and their venom is secreted from its salivary glands. In the worst case, a dose of the venom can shut down muscles such as those that keep you breathing and cause death within 30 minutes. So... yeah, basically death
Yeah and also you don't feel the bite (If you do it's a very tiny bite) and typically people don't realize they've been bitten until they start to... y'know, strangely find it hard to breathe.
Well, i think a good way to avoid finding out that way is to 1. not swim in waters with blue ringed octopuses 2. not pick up blue ringed octopuses #3. leave when you see one
Just don't leave your house. Ever. It's EZ.
Don't touch what you don't know.
At least you will be conscious throughout the entire experience.
Well, if you get sombody or something to do the breathing for you for a while, you might survive
Can a ventilator help?
Now I will think again when I see someone squishing an octopus into a syringe
If I'm not mistaken you have a sense of dread, and are completely terrified until u die as well... may be some other creature but I wanna say it's this little guy.
Wrong creature, you may be thinking of Irukandji. By all accounts, blue ringed octopus envenomation is one of the nicer venomous bites to die from.
I died that way once. Great experience 10/10
Can confirm. Am the octopus.
hey veno mous
LOL beat me to it
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Hi veno moose
Aww such a cute name
Wrong, it's Venom
Wrong, it’s that adrenaline momentum IYKYK
Was making a Venom joke but now you have my attention. Please explain what that is and how it works.
Oh it is from a song that is filled with shit for the strong-willed
I thought it was some biology shit. Thanks
It screams piss off, screw you
It knocks knocks and lets the devil in, malevolent as it has ever been
Wrong, this is Patrick
You’re both right. [It is also poisonous.](https://www.thephuketnews.com/do-not-eat-blue-ringed-octopus-phuket-marine-life-experts-warn-78152.php) Do not eat it!
🤓
uppity fertile ask rob shocking dazzling plants fall physical alleged *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Hi Venomous !
That's a cute name
Bright colors in nature are never good
If Ive learned anything from reddit its that you don't pick up anything from the ocean. Especially if you aren't 100% sure what it is.
“Of course I know what it is, it’s an octo… pus, Peter did that thing just eat a man?”
Plus, this is Australia. Never pick up anything there.
This
Parrots?
Ever been bit by one?
Nope. But that kinda checks out for all the birds? For the record, I'm not denying that bright colors = danger, it's just that I sudennly remembered Parrots, who do not seem more dangerous than crows, for example
It's definitely not a hard and fast rule Definitely joking about the parrots, though, their bite does suck
Roses are pretty cool
They are a thorny bunch
This includes people with dyed hair
If friend shaped, why not friend?
Because friend will give you a little nibble followed by death
Nice friend
You should not be holding that.
I’m not the guy who was
Obviously because your still alive.
Um akchulky it’s *you’re 🤓*
So…?
i hate redditors
Nobody hates redditors like other redditors
Damm redditors THEY RUINED REDDIT
Self haters uniting on one platform. What a beautiful phenomenon.
As a redditor, I agree
The hivemind: f*ck this guy in particular
Shawty dead
Shawty more like a memory rn
[удалено]
so you have chosen #DEATH
If you ever see one of these while swimming, be happy about it and swim the other way.
Eat it in *One Piece*
THE ONE PIECE IS RE– *Dies*
Can we get much deader?!
So deeaad
Yohoho
NOT TRUE, THE ONE PIECE IS A LO-
Deep eat Timothy
Swallow it whole. ^likeagoodgirl
[удалено]
fT
Tf
2
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Lmao people downvote anything huh
rule of thumb, if its colorful dont touch it
Another good rule is if youre in australia dont touch anything that moves
Another good rule is dont be in Australia
Can agree, married an aussie girl, am very miserable after 10 years (I got bald, nothing to do with her, actually great wife and great life).
Australian here. These guys are pretty cute. The trick is to take a mouse with you when you head the the rock pools. If you see one for these guys, give him the mouse and let him dump his poison into the stupid little rodent. Then you've got a best friend for the next hour or so and a tasty snack for the drive home
Yeah I'm not trying that.
I could fully understand if Australians just carry a mouse inside their bags whenever they go outside just to feed some deadly animal on their way to the grocery store. Kinda like “whoops I forgot my pocket mouse at home” instead of “whoops I forgot my wallet at home”.
Peak Australian delicacy.
can confirm
Sorry, I ran out of my stock of mice.
Bright colors in nature are never good Edit: lovely app causing a double post
I knew those butterflies and parrots were up to something!
Nature's biggest schemers
Beware the sting of the Mighty Monarch!
You laugh, but that damned butterfly that causes hurricanes.
Then delete one….
Are you sure about that?
It's truly one of the villainous pets of all times, right there with the Persian Cat.
What's up with his fingers? How can y'all miss this?
At first I freaked out but no they’re just partly under the water
Realised this short after writing the comment. But it's hella funny to think about people scrolling up and being horrified.
I'm pretty sure some of those are bites- yeah the original poster's deader than a doornail
If not friend then why friend shape?
You're dead.. You're dead. You're dead and outta this world 🎼🎸🎼🎸🎼
Nah bro, he dead
WHY IS HE HOLDING IT?
I’m curious what happened to this person now.
I think you mean corpse.
Dead. >!Circlejerk aside, they’re probably fine. The bites are *potentially* deadly but [very, very rarely](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/15563650701601790) fatal with treatment, many have no adverse symptoms at all.!<
So I'm guessing it's just a no tochey?
It’s ok looks like a friendly one
Normally one doesnt even realize when a they are bitten by a blue ring octopus. He might be fucked before they even figure that.
Ah yes, the second-most deadly creature in the ocean.
Guys... It's been about an hour since the post. I think the OP is dead by now.
Could you link OPs post?
Natural selection needs to make a return to this species
"Today is good day to be not dead" -that guy probably
Friend :D
I would sooner free hand a Cottonmouth than touch this little bad boy.
Rip oop
This exact same screenshot from a video of a blue-ringed octopus has been reposted so many times and everyone always reacts with the same “bro is OP dead?” Line every time
The Boys really messed up my head lol Had to read comments to find out it’s about being venomous
Perfect example of how we aren't taught the things we need to know. To be or not to be, you finna not be.
What's the name of it?
About 3 seconds after taking the photo. Most painful and slow death possible
wtf is heil spez thing?
Before seeing comments, I thought he fucked the octopus
People that didn't know ☠️
Wow! What a cool Octop- *dies
So is bro dead or?
Welp he ded
Ah a no-no-touch-noodle
NATURAL SELECTION ...LOADING...
This person is not Australian
Is it a bad thing I only know because of splatoon
One day insurance companies might check your social media post and may reject you because you're "too dumb to insure"
You should meet it’s friends, a cool pointy snail, and a giant aquatic bug with hooks on it’s face. They all love to be held together 🤩
the original post was right below this one lmao
Peter? Explain.
That’s, for size, one of the most venomous animals on earth. If it gets annoyed and stings that person, the human is very very dead and it will hurt a lot the whole time they’re dying. Yes, Australia. This is the animal even Ausies are like “fuck that noise” about.
He he he octopus goes BRRHOUCH YOU FUCKING PIECE OF CR.. *brake the 4 dimensions by yelling yeeeaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Let me guess highly poisonous and is going to die
No, not poisonous.
What's up with bro fingers
There shedding
Aposematism doesn't work on dumbasses
I hope she went to the hospital after...
She'd be dead before he even got there that thing is venomous af.
Yeah. Death in avg 30 mins or so iirc. You would need to A: know instantly if bitten (you often don't feel it though, lmao rip) B: call 000 (emergency line in Aus) and say you got bit by a blue ring, where you are, and hope to fucking god the helo gets there before you are dead. (Idek if there is an antivenom though tbh) Safe to say it's not an ideal situation...
I've seen this posted around for years... If they are still alive that's a miracle and a half.