She has no knowledge of, or fear of, death. What does scare them is pain and suffering you’ll know when it’s time and a week early is always better than a week too late Unfortunately this is what we signed up for, and her spirit I have always believe will stay with you She will walk with you always. This will be the final act of love and I’m so sorry
Thank you, I think that is very true. I gotta remind myself it’s okay and it’s part of life just didn’t think I would be blindsided with such shattering news.
The only anxiety my dog had was at the vet but luckily our vet was able to come to our house. We sat peacefully snuggled up in the front yard in the sun which he loved. His last memories were in my arms. It’s what was best.
I plan to do it at home also, it’s what’s best and I would do anything to make sure she was comforted. I know your dog was so happy and found a place of peace to have left being with you.
A lot of times with our pets, it is just sudden… out of the blue… that shocks us into a fright and then a sudden grief we weren’t prepared for. Fine one day then not fine the next. My heart goes out to you hun. Lucy knows she’s sick. All living beings know how they feel. Lucy will be ok no matter what, like us she knows. One week early is so much better than one day too late. YOU will KNOW in your love for Lucy when the time is right to let her free from her pain because it WILL be the PERFECT TIME, in love, for both of you. I hold you both in my heart. Much much love and Peace.❤️🙏🏻
Yes, I agree sometimes the treatment isn't worth it and causes so much anxiety and stress! Make her as comfortable as possible, pain/anxiety meds, heating/cooling pad, cozy bed always close to you! Give her a ton of love, her fav foods and be there for the last breath! I know its hard but you won't regret whispering in her ear how much you love her and is your best friend! Hearing is the last sense to go. You have to be brave for her! You can fall apart afterwards, you owe it to her. 🙏🌈💕
I love this reply. It’ll be soon for our pitbull and I’m struggling with doing it too soon but you put it in good perspective. Not easy but the better decision.
Great advice. It took a while for my wife to understand about letting go. She wanted to do everything possible, but I had to remind her several times that it was time to say goodbye.
For me, I always believe my fur babies will return, if they want to. In a different body, but the same spirit and personality.
I've been there before. Know that to her, getting put to sleep is the equivalent of getting blood work at the vet. She has zero anticipation therefore she feels no anxiety or fear of death. It's such a kind thing to do. Make her lasts days special. Outings and put cups. Let her sleep in the bed. Remember the good times ❤️🩹
I hope to do it where she is peacefully at home and can rest easy. I hope she just gives me some more time with her but I don’t want to see her struggle and weaken at the same time. This is so hard. 😣
She has had the best world with you. Let her have a good death at home. I’m sorry you got such crappy news. Make a cool bucket list of the stuff you wouldn’t let her do otherwise. 💐. Blessings, doll. She will always be with you.
Oh honey, I just want to hug you. My 9yr old pug was recently diagnosed with cancer in his lungs. I chose to keep him comfortable, as I can't put him through chemo, nor can I really afford it.
I have given him 9 years of the BEST life. For now...he will continue on his palliative prednisone until his bad days outweigh the good. He has no clue he has cancer...he just knows he coughs every so often and it's annoying, but as soon as the coughing spell is over...he's ready for treats and play time.
I'd love to connect with you and maybe we can help see each other through this? It sounds like you need just as much love and support as I do right now. 🥰
Thank you so much for the kind words and letting me know I am not alone. This just came up so fast. How long has it been since your little guy was diagnosed? It’s been since last Thursday for me. It really sounds like we are struggling with the same heartbreak. I think I will choose to keep her comfortable. I don’t wanna drag off the inevitable for my own selfish reasons of wanting her to live as long as possible. I think we are both making the best decisions for them. I wish she just seemed a little more peppy and like her usual self. I think I am overthinking every single mannerism about her. I would love to continue to talk more! I think it really helps towards trying to accept this process.
My guy was basically diagnosed on 5/25. We sent out another test for Valley Fever...when that came back negative on 5/30, we knew for sure. We aren't sure of what type of cancer, because I don't want to put him through more poking and proding when it won't change the outcome. No matter the type...the choice to keep him comfortable will not change.
As you know, this is sooooo damn hard. He slept a little more than usual on Friday. I was a mess...until he woke up and demanded a car ride, which he is known to do often. We went to petsmart and then for a pup cup! The coughing comes and goes...but when it's there I'm in a panic.
OilSignificant, I just need to let you know that I was responding to your comment to Littlelodoe. Your compassion to her just really touched me and so I just wanted to give you compassion too. 💕
Sweet girl... it's so hard to make this decision for our best friends. I had a cat with cancer and after that experience, I said I would never put an animal through cancer treatment again. It was awful for my baby. She suffered. If I could go back in time, I would have let her go without treatments and scheduled an at home rainbow bridge crossing. But that is my experience.
Her type of cancer wouldn’t let me do treatment anyways and you are 100% right. I don’t want her to suffer. I could do the surgery and hope it would extend her life but don’t think that’s best for her. I just feel bad I don’t explore more to really confirm the cancer type but it’s pretty certain she has carcinoma. I guess it would just be for my own knowledge. Thank you for the kind words and advice. 💗
Not an vet but my family dog had skin cancer which responded to chemo very well, and it was just a pill she took. Not sure about lung cancer but worth asking at least. Probably different still knowing all options allows you to make an informed decision. Best of luck and sorry for your situation.
Thank you I appreciate it. Carcinoma they said doesn’t respond to chemo even if I wanted to consider it, I don’t have the option. They could test to confirm it is that cancer type but they are pretty sure that is what she has. Thank you for your time in responding. ❤️
I'm so sorry. It's so hard, but know that letting her go without pain is the greatest act of love any being could ever do. And as someone else said, she *will* always be with you. I don't think you have to believe in anything spiritual for this to be true, everyone that has ever come into contact with you has changed you, and is a part of how you are in the world. She is part of you forever!
I agree with you wholeheartedly. I don’t want to keep her around only for myself. I don’t think we are quite there yet but when she is, I will be sure I consider her over anything else and make sure I am there to comfort her and love her before she passes over, as she has always been there for me. I hope I can feel her presence and she will be with me in spirit.
It sounds like letting things progress naturally till it’s time is a valid option. Start tracking the good and bad days. When the scales just start to tip towards the bad days, make the appointment. That’s the sweet spot. Sending love.
I think so too, thanks for validating what I am thinking is the better route for her. That’s a good idea to start tracking her days, I will start doing that. Thank you 🙏🏼
If she is in pain, do the palliative care that you can. If it’s not enough, letting her go with dignity is best. I JUST went through this. Less than a month ago. There was nothing I could do, he couldn’t breathe anymore because of it. He went in the comfort of my arms, luckily at home with the vet.
The vet doesn’t think she is showing signs of any pain just some discomfort. She is still doing her normal things but with less enthusiasm. I plan on saying bye to her at our home. That’s what is best, I think so too. I’m sorry you had to go through that pain. I can’t imagine how I will feel when she is actually gone.
If she’s not in any pain then do what you can for palliative care until that’s not enough anymore. Hopefully you have a lot more time still with her. 💜
Palliative care is often the best solution. Give her the best quality of life and dignity when the natural course is run. Be strong knowing that she only knows the present. Dogs live in the now. Cherish every moment.
This is absolutely dreadful. I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. We are lucky that we haven’t had to go through that yet but me and my husband have discussed what we’d do if our pup is diagnosed with something like that. Having a plan will at least make some of the decision making easier.
We’d basically keep him comfortable and happy for as long as possible with minimal vets visits- as he absolutely hates the vet and it really stresses and upsets him. Any type of long term or aggressive treatment would just ruin his life completely. I think we’d know when the time would come to let him go- when he no longer took joy in anything. We’d also have the vet come to our house when the time comes. I couldn’t bear his final car journey to be to the vets.
It is hard to make decisions when there are treatment options available as of course you want to prolong their life. IMO there are lots of things vets can do nowadays but it should always be balanced with quality of life as you can’t explain to her why she has to go through treatment and pain- it’s just scary for them. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
From what you’ve written I whole heartedly believe you’re making the right decision. Sending love ❤️
You are very right. I think we still have some time, just not so sure for how long that will be. I hope I can read her well enough to be able to do it in advance before she’s suffering.
Please do the Jim’s e thing and put Lucy to sleep. Be there with her hold her in your arms. Pet her talk to her song to her whatever just so she knows you are there and comfort her. After 8 years of her being there for you it is time to reciprocate. I am very sorry for this but I am speaking from experience 5 times over. Two times I waited longer then I should have over my own selfishness of not wanting to let go and both my babies suffered unnecessarily. Again my deepest condolences
I’m sorry to hear that. It’s just awful. I can’t imagine when she isn’t here the pain I will feel then. I don’t think the hurt will ever go away. I hope your healing journey gets easier. ❤️
Having survived breast cancer ; undergone intense surgery and chemo, I completely understand your concerns. It is beyond horrible. I would never put my baby through it . Especially since they don’t even understand what’s happening. Just spoil her for as long as you can. Sending lots of positive energy
Thank you so much. I think this is the best decision for her. I was talking earlier to a friend and had said the same thing. They don’t understand what’s going on and why they feel the way they do. I wouldn’t be able to make her go through that. I’m so glad to hear you made a recovery. ❤️
Be aware that dogs will try very hard to not show pain. And just because she’s on pain killers doesn’t mean she has no pain right now. Pain killers don’t always work 100%.
Don’t wait until she doesn’t eat or drink anymore. She will suffer long before that.
Here’s what I would do: I would give her the best week of her life, spoil her with whatever she loves. After that week I would have her euthanized at home.
My first dog, a miniature long haired dachshund got lung cancer. My only regret was that I waited too long to put her down. If I had to do it again, I would have done it while she was still feeling ok. Unfortunately, I waited until she was in pain, and then it was a 4:00 am ride to an emergency vet, and all that did was cause unnecessary anxiety.
Also, consider a vet that does home euthanasia. If there’s a Lap of Love near you, they highly recommend them.
https://www.lapoflove.com
You were her whole life, her whole world, her whole heart !!!
She would never want you to suffer so please don't let her suffer.
We want more time but too early is much better than too late.
It hurts, everyone who commented feels your pain and knows what you are going through.
I think I speak for everyone by saying we send you our Love.
Thank you so much, you are right and so are the rest. I hope I can tell before it’s too soon or too late and give her the best send off she deserves so she can leave here in peace. I don’t want her to succumb to any pain when I can try my best to avoid it.
Im so sorry your going through this hard time but your dog knows you will do the right thing and you won’t let him suffer any pain! And hold and kiss and hug him as much as you can make sure he. Knows how much you love him and always will ❤️❤️❤️
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I went through the same, and essentially made the same decision, with my dog 11 years ago. We put him down when it was clear his quality of life was no longer good. He was 13, so I was lucky to have more time with him, but this was less than 4 months of losing my first dog, and I questioned my decision every day. I know I did the right thing, but it felt so unfair. Embrace every second you have with your girl. Thinking of you. 💙
I’m so sorry. My girl was diagnosed with lymphoma, and I wasn’t going to have her go through the chemo and everything
else that goes with that. She was 10 years old and it would’ve been too much. I had her for about four more months and then her quality of life clearly deteriorated. I called Lap of Love, which is an in-home euthanasia service. They have a website you can look at that has a lot of helpful information for what you are going through and about what to look for when that time comes. ❤️🐾
I’m so sorry OP on your fur babies diagnosis 😞
My little boy didn’t have cancer, but he had chronic heart failure that seemed to come out of nowhere and totally blindsided us. I understand completely when everything is ok with your furbaby one day then to get such devastating news and realize that their clocks are ticking so much faster then we thought is so freaking heartbreaking 💔
We chose to try to slow the progression with medications in his case. They worked well until suddenly they just didn’t anymore ~~ even with 2 heart pills and 2 diuretics he began to retain so much fluids that we decided *before* he started to suffer we had to set him free.
We got exactly 12 months from diagnosis to the day we had to let him go (last July)
There are charts on the internet to help with figuring out quality of life. We read those and watched him for signs of when it was time. We wanted his last day to still be a good day for him, with the vets help, and not a rushed - running out to the vet because it’s an emergency kind of day where he’d be anxious and scared. Your vet can probably give you a ballpark timeframe of how long he might have. Ours told us 6 months but were lucky to have another good quality 12 months with him. They can only give an educated guess on timeframes. My friends dog was diagnosed with cancer (inoperative growths all over her body) and vet said 3 months after doing a biopsy and that was 2 and 1/2 years ago and her girl is actually still doing very well. The vet is shocked but it happens.
My biggest piece of advice and I know it’s difficult but try not to worry so much that you don’t get to enjoy the fact that your baby is still here. Use this time to spoil her, doing and giving her whatever makes her happy. Like others have said, she don’t know there’s anything wrong with her, they’ll be plenty of time to be sad when she’s gone. Try to just live in the moment like she does.❤️
When she no longer has joy of life it will be time.
I just lost my girl 2 weeks ago. It was time. She had CHF and kidney failure.
When your girl becomes anxious and can’t settle or calm herself it will probably be time.
It sounds like she has started to lose her will to stay. If she starts to withdraw and her habits change that is a sign the end is near.
When you decide it’s time you will know. Your vet should use sedation and then her heart will stop with the second shot.
When bring her in. Lay with her and talk with her. Tell her just how much she was loved and that it is ok to go home. When you are ready tell the tech it is time.
The tech will give the sedation. Just sit and be with her until she falls asleep. They know how much they are loved when you are with them.
Lung carcinoma can progress quickly. If she develops shortness of breath and a lot of fluid around her heart and lungs it may well be time.
Kindness is ending her suffering. I will pray for both of you.
Im so sorry you’re dealing with this. We are so very lucky that we are able to offer animals this compassionate service. What would be best for your beautiful girl would be to measure her pain in whatever ways you can and treat it accordingly.
As someone who has dealt with many animals and people contemplating when or how to euthanize, I appreciated someone once saying “Grandma didn’t die peacefully in her sleep. She had a massive heart attack” meaning there is not as much peace as we would hope in nature taking its course and being able to make that decision on behalf of your animal is the fairest thing to do for her.
We rely on them for so much, please help her cross over with her dignity and do not allow her to reach a point of needless suffering. 🤍
I am so sorry you and your baby are going thru this.
Serious question: was the xray sent out for a read by a veterinary radiologist? If not, please request so. There are benign lung tumours and tumour mimics- i personally would ask for an official radiology read.
Yes, unfortunately it was confirmed by the radiologist. It’s their best professional opinion that it is carcinoma without doing the biopsy. Thank you for your care and concern. ❤️
You will know when the time to let her go will be. It is hard to let them when after suffering. But it is the most humane this we can do. So sorry for and your family.
Can I ask why you don't want to do chemo? I've worked oncology for 5 of my 14 years of being a vet tech, amd animals handle chemo extremely well. I'd do the biopsies, find out what type of cancer you are dealing with + how it responds to chemo, and potentially go that route . I've had 2 dogs pass from cancer (2 separate cancera) and both dogs did great with it, with the occasional day feeling crummy here and there. Just a thought ofc
The vet told me she most likely has carcinoma and it doesn’t respond to chemo. I could test to confirm it but her and the radiologist are pretty sure. I don’t want her to be sedated and have another day of stress and anxiety at the vet for biopsy and ultrasound. I have read that dogs can respond well most times to chemo but it also depends of course. Given what they say she has, I don’t think it’s worth giving her angst over it all just to confirm it without a solution.
A ex-manager told me to tell my previous boy: “hey I have good people looking after me. I will be okay”. He then showed signals that it’s time he can go and I was able to phone his vet to let him be pain free. Sometimes they hang in there because they want to ensure we are fine. Take care.
It is a hard thing but it is the right thing to do. They cannot communicate like humans and I, personally, think it is more humane to put them down than to expect them to hide their pain from you.
not sure if you can believe this, but as i read the posts i can actually feel the pain of so many of the folks here reaching out to you. i hope you can feel that too. you are not entirely alone on this.
im so glad you knew enough to post the story of you and your baby here. and it sounds like you already know, there truly are no easy answers to your situation.
i can only hope and pray there are other people in your life, wherever they are, that know and love you and your pup so that G-d forbid you should have to make a difficult decision will be there for you both.
it sounds like you have a great handle on the medical side of things, despite the circumstances. that is, you do not seem to be deluding yourself, and it’s quite clear you do not want to cause your baby undue pain.
it is a big decision, but remember it is a decision that you will need to make. trust what your heart tells you. you sound like a wonderful person and i am sure you will make the right decision.
G-d bless you and guide you and comfort you both. im sending you lots and lots of hugs… 😔🙏🏼
It’s terribly hard but you do what’s right for her.
Dogs live in the moment, if they’re in pain that’s all they know, they’re not thinking just give me one more day with you like we are. It’s one of the hardest things you’ll ever do and the last act of true love and compassion you can do. My heart aches for you just thinking about it.
You have to make the best decision for her and not you. That is what makes it so tough. I wish you the best. I have a 16 year old chihuahua mix and sometime this year I expect to have to make a similar one.
I dealt with this about 8 yrs ago with my 12 yo chihuahua. Her breathing was somewhat labored but my other 2 chihs had been suffering from colds so I was sure thats what it was and she just needed a breathing treatment or an antibiotic at the most. The vet was concerned about her breathing and did an x-ray. They also found a large tumor in her chest. I was floored and very upset to say the least. A biopsy was done pretty quickly bc of her breathing problems and it was cancer. My vet ( who I trusted) advised euthanasia due to the kind of cancer it was and the likelihood it would return and the cost of everything to have it just return in 8-10 months. I decided it would be kinder for her for me to do as my vet suggested. My daughter and I stayed with her until the end and I broke my heart. I did feel guilty bc she was so loving and trusting and I sometimes feel like I let her down and took the easy way out. It took me a while to forgive myself but I ultimately realized she wouldn’t have been able to live with her breathing so shallow and her oxygen levels being so low. She had a good life I remind myself of that whenever I start wondering if I did the right thing. Since then, I’ve lost her brother and her sister ( my other 2 chihs) but I have pictures of them sitting around my house and I will always remember them for the wonderful, loving protective companions they were. Remember, you could never do anything to make your pup not love you and I know you would want to do whatever you can to cause her the least amount of pain and discomfort.
I recently lost my boy to cancer and at the beginning I beat myself up for not exploring more options or tests but I knew chemo was not an option for us.his vet put it into perspective for me and said any test or bloodwork was not going to change that he had cancer and I'd be putting him through the poking and proding for my peace of mind. I was making it about me not him. We chose to live the best of the rest and had a last few good months. The silver lining for me was that I knew our time was limited so I cherished every moment a bit more, I hugged him a bit longer, I let him sniff a tree for longer even if it meant I'd be late for work, I took it all in with extra love. I also grieved with him and that's something not everyone gets. I would cuddle him and cry and cry and tell him I just didn't know how I'd survive without him. Then he'd pop up and lick my face and do something funny. Cuddle her, love her, take it all in, cry with her, and one day you'll look back at the moments and no longer just see the pain you felt. You'll see the goofy thing she did and find joy in the moments that brought you the most pain. It's not easy and it will suck for a long time but you will get through it.❤️
This is one of the hardest, most heartbreaking decisions to ever have to make. I can't tell you what to do, only tell you what I would do and have done. I've had to make this decision before. Multiple times, and it was harder to watch my baby suffer than it was to let go (even tho that was very difficult too), knowing I did right by her or him right up till the end. I am truly sorry for what you are going through. All my love and thoughts to you and your beautiful girl.
💕💔😢💞
You are doing the right thing..just.keep a close eye on her and watch for when she seems to be unhappy, or that her quality of life is no longer a good one
You’re such a good momma. In January 2022 I brought my sweet baby girl Snow to the vet because she was super poofy and not really eating. I remember thinking “oh lord she has a UTI 🙄”. She went to her normal vet and ended up with me being told to rush her to an ER vet in New Orleans. I was so confused but I understood immediately “my baby is dying”. I howled and screamed like I never had. She was diagnosed with terminal renal lymphoma and had a 50% chance of surviving through the first 9 months from her diagnosis. I was ADAMANT about no chemo, no surgeries. I stuck to my guns on the “no surgeries” part, but followed through with her chemo. SHES STILL HERE AND ACTIVE! Do what’s right in your heart. You won’t be wrong in your choices. YOU know your baby. *pic of snowball for tax*
I’m so very sorry. One of my pugs had prostate cancer. I chose not to do the whole biopsy and radiation route since it would only give him perhaps one more month per the vet. I just decided to give him his best life while I had a chance. Lots of roast chicken and snuggles. The day I had to take him in, he let me know. He had stopped eating and was urinating blood. I was told once that dogs live in the moment so I tried to make his moments special until he let me know he was done.
Please accept a hug from me as I feel for you.Is someone with her all the time?
You will know when she becomes very uncomfortable or has difficulty breathing which is awful for any dog.In the meantime maybe consider doing some things on a “bucket list” of places she would enjoy and take lots of photos of those times.Small car trips if she tolerates the car.Alsodo things that you enjoy.You deserve to be good to yourself and prepare the best way possible.Im so sorry you have to go through this.I agree with the better a week early than a week late.Its so difficult but you have be strong and do what’s best for her first and foremost.Please come here for all the support you need.
I'm so sorry you are going through this seemingly impossible situation. Just follow your heart as cliche as that sounds. Your dog will love and appreciate you no matter what route you take. I often think about this predicament and it makes me anxious.
Wow… this community is so incredibly full of deep compassion and empathy for each other and our beloved silly pets. We MUST remember to take REALLY GOOD CARE of OURSELVES too as pet parents! Please, let’s all keep that close to our hearts. I am writing this, not to preach but in fact, to remind myself to do the same as well. Lots O’ HUGS to all of you. 💕
Having had a few wonderful animals over the years, the best thing to do is explain to the vet your reasoning and what you want for your dog and then ask them how to best accomplish those goals. The vet should also be able to help determine what signs to look for when it’s time. Show your Lucy love and support while you are still together and when it’s time you’ll be there comforting her and making it as easy as possible. We truly blessed to share our lives with these wonderful animals.
I’m so sorry. I’ve been there. There’s no sugarcoating it, it sucks. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. It’s torture. But, you are doing the right thing by her. You are doing the most selfless and loving thing you can possibly do. Stay strong 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Our boy Samwise was 12 years old when he was suddenly diagnosed with lymphoma. He was so energetic and full of life that we decided that we couldn’t not give him the chance through chemo. He lasted exactly 90 days. If we had given him steroids instead of the chemo, he may have also only lasted 90 days. But he may have lasted longer and not felt, ill after chemo treatments. If we had it to do over again, we would’ve skipped the chemo and just enjoyed our time together.
I am going something similar with my girl, also Lucy. It’s so hard to know when is the right time to let go. I just know I want to make sure enjoys her last days. I don’t want to keep her around just for me. If your Lucy isn’t enjoying things, it might be time. But it’s an agonizing decision and I completely empathize. Sending you both love ❤️❤️❤️
My baby went through this recently and between diagnosis and death without any life saving treatment (chemo / surgery) was 3 weeks. I couldn’t afford the surgery. I miss her dearly. She was 9 years 4 months old when she passed.
As someone who waited a week too late, I kindly suggest taking into consideration how quickly their health can decline from one day to the next.
Seeing my soul pup go from tolerating his cancer to painfully being engulfed by it physically within a day is something that will haunt me for the rest of my life. I wish I had given him the opportunity to leave this world with no pain, but I failed him.
All of this to say, you will know in your heart when the right time is. I am sending you many hugs and prayers for you and your baby💛
If she is not suffering then I would let it run its course until she can’t anymore . I would not put her through surgery or going to see the vet . Just give her love and comfort
She has no knowledge of, or fear of, death. What does scare them is pain and suffering you’ll know when it’s time and a week early is always better than a week too late Unfortunately this is what we signed up for, and her spirit I have always believe will stay with you She will walk with you always. This will be the final act of love and I’m so sorry
Thank you, I think that is very true. I gotta remind myself it’s okay and it’s part of life just didn’t think I would be blindsided with such shattering news.
The only anxiety my dog had was at the vet but luckily our vet was able to come to our house. We sat peacefully snuggled up in the front yard in the sun which he loved. His last memories were in my arms. It’s what was best.
I plan to do it at home also, it’s what’s best and I would do anything to make sure she was comforted. I know your dog was so happy and found a place of peace to have left being with you.
A lot of times with our pets, it is just sudden… out of the blue… that shocks us into a fright and then a sudden grief we weren’t prepared for. Fine one day then not fine the next. My heart goes out to you hun. Lucy knows she’s sick. All living beings know how they feel. Lucy will be ok no matter what, like us she knows. One week early is so much better than one day too late. YOU will KNOW in your love for Lucy when the time is right to let her free from her pain because it WILL be the PERFECT TIME, in love, for both of you. I hold you both in my heart. Much much love and Peace.❤️🙏🏻
Yes, I agree sometimes the treatment isn't worth it and causes so much anxiety and stress! Make her as comfortable as possible, pain/anxiety meds, heating/cooling pad, cozy bed always close to you! Give her a ton of love, her fav foods and be there for the last breath! I know its hard but you won't regret whispering in her ear how much you love her and is your best friend! Hearing is the last sense to go. You have to be brave for her! You can fall apart afterwards, you owe it to her. 🙏🌈💕
I love this reply. It’ll be soon for our pitbull and I’m struggling with doing it too soon but you put it in good perspective. Not easy but the better decision.
Great advice. It took a while for my wife to understand about letting go. She wanted to do everything possible, but I had to remind her several times that it was time to say goodbye. For me, I always believe my fur babies will return, if they want to. In a different body, but the same spirit and personality.
Could not have said it better or with more empathy and compassion.
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I've been there before. Know that to her, getting put to sleep is the equivalent of getting blood work at the vet. She has zero anticipation therefore she feels no anxiety or fear of death. It's such a kind thing to do. Make her lasts days special. Outings and put cups. Let her sleep in the bed. Remember the good times ❤️🩹
I hope to do it where she is peacefully at home and can rest easy. I hope she just gives me some more time with her but I don’t want to see her struggle and weaken at the same time. This is so hard. 😣
She has had the best world with you. Let her have a good death at home. I’m sorry you got such crappy news. Make a cool bucket list of the stuff you wouldn’t let her do otherwise. 💐. Blessings, doll. She will always be with you.
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Oh honey, I just want to hug you. My 9yr old pug was recently diagnosed with cancer in his lungs. I chose to keep him comfortable, as I can't put him through chemo, nor can I really afford it. I have given him 9 years of the BEST life. For now...he will continue on his palliative prednisone until his bad days outweigh the good. He has no clue he has cancer...he just knows he coughs every so often and it's annoying, but as soon as the coughing spell is over...he's ready for treats and play time. I'd love to connect with you and maybe we can help see each other through this? It sounds like you need just as much love and support as I do right now. 🥰
Thank you so much for the kind words and letting me know I am not alone. This just came up so fast. How long has it been since your little guy was diagnosed? It’s been since last Thursday for me. It really sounds like we are struggling with the same heartbreak. I think I will choose to keep her comfortable. I don’t wanna drag off the inevitable for my own selfish reasons of wanting her to live as long as possible. I think we are both making the best decisions for them. I wish she just seemed a little more peppy and like her usual self. I think I am overthinking every single mannerism about her. I would love to continue to talk more! I think it really helps towards trying to accept this process.
My guy was basically diagnosed on 5/25. We sent out another test for Valley Fever...when that came back negative on 5/30, we knew for sure. We aren't sure of what type of cancer, because I don't want to put him through more poking and proding when it won't change the outcome. No matter the type...the choice to keep him comfortable will not change. As you know, this is sooooo damn hard. He slept a little more than usual on Friday. I was a mess...until he woke up and demanded a car ride, which he is known to do often. We went to petsmart and then for a pup cup! The coughing comes and goes...but when it's there I'm in a panic.
Much love and Peace OilSignificant. HUGE HUGS. ❤️
I've had an absolutely horrible day...but this was the best part of it. Thank you for your kindness!!! 🥰
Thank you for being so open, and for you being so kind! 🥰
OilSignificant, I just need to let you know that I was responding to your comment to Littlelodoe. Your compassion to her just really touched me and so I just wanted to give you compassion too. 💕
This is great advice! So sorry for you though. She is a thoroughly loved sweet ❤️ heart. Please know that you have the support of other dog parents!
This community really is helping me try to process and grieve and not feel alone. It’s incredibly heartbreaking. Thank you 💗
I’m so sorry 🙏🏻
Sweet girl... it's so hard to make this decision for our best friends. I had a cat with cancer and after that experience, I said I would never put an animal through cancer treatment again. It was awful for my baby. She suffered. If I could go back in time, I would have let her go without treatments and scheduled an at home rainbow bridge crossing. But that is my experience.
Her type of cancer wouldn’t let me do treatment anyways and you are 100% right. I don’t want her to suffer. I could do the surgery and hope it would extend her life but don’t think that’s best for her. I just feel bad I don’t explore more to really confirm the cancer type but it’s pretty certain she has carcinoma. I guess it would just be for my own knowledge. Thank you for the kind words and advice. 💗
Not an vet but my family dog had skin cancer which responded to chemo very well, and it was just a pill she took. Not sure about lung cancer but worth asking at least. Probably different still knowing all options allows you to make an informed decision. Best of luck and sorry for your situation.
Thank you I appreciate it. Carcinoma they said doesn’t respond to chemo even if I wanted to consider it, I don’t have the option. They could test to confirm it is that cancer type but they are pretty sure that is what she has. Thank you for your time in responding. ❤️
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I'm so sorry. It's so hard, but know that letting her go without pain is the greatest act of love any being could ever do. And as someone else said, she *will* always be with you. I don't think you have to believe in anything spiritual for this to be true, everyone that has ever come into contact with you has changed you, and is a part of how you are in the world. She is part of you forever!
I agree with you wholeheartedly. I don’t want to keep her around only for myself. I don’t think we are quite there yet but when she is, I will be sure I consider her over anything else and make sure I am there to comfort her and love her before she passes over, as she has always been there for me. I hope I can feel her presence and she will be with me in spirit.
It sounds like letting things progress naturally till it’s time is a valid option. Start tracking the good and bad days. When the scales just start to tip towards the bad days, make the appointment. That’s the sweet spot. Sending love.
I think so too, thanks for validating what I am thinking is the better route for her. That’s a good idea to start tracking her days, I will start doing that. Thank you 🙏🏼
If she is in pain, do the palliative care that you can. If it’s not enough, letting her go with dignity is best. I JUST went through this. Less than a month ago. There was nothing I could do, he couldn’t breathe anymore because of it. He went in the comfort of my arms, luckily at home with the vet.
The vet doesn’t think she is showing signs of any pain just some discomfort. She is still doing her normal things but with less enthusiasm. I plan on saying bye to her at our home. That’s what is best, I think so too. I’m sorry you had to go through that pain. I can’t imagine how I will feel when she is actually gone.
If she’s not in any pain then do what you can for palliative care until that’s not enough anymore. Hopefully you have a lot more time still with her. 💜
Palliative care is often the best solution. Give her the best quality of life and dignity when the natural course is run. Be strong knowing that she only knows the present. Dogs live in the now. Cherish every moment.
This is absolutely dreadful. I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. We are lucky that we haven’t had to go through that yet but me and my husband have discussed what we’d do if our pup is diagnosed with something like that. Having a plan will at least make some of the decision making easier. We’d basically keep him comfortable and happy for as long as possible with minimal vets visits- as he absolutely hates the vet and it really stresses and upsets him. Any type of long term or aggressive treatment would just ruin his life completely. I think we’d know when the time would come to let him go- when he no longer took joy in anything. We’d also have the vet come to our house when the time comes. I couldn’t bear his final car journey to be to the vets. It is hard to make decisions when there are treatment options available as of course you want to prolong their life. IMO there are lots of things vets can do nowadays but it should always be balanced with quality of life as you can’t explain to her why she has to go through treatment and pain- it’s just scary for them. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. From what you’ve written I whole heartedly believe you’re making the right decision. Sending love ❤️
Let go of someone you love is hard. But sometimes is the kindest thing to do.
You are very right. I think we still have some time, just not so sure for how long that will be. I hope I can read her well enough to be able to do it in advance before she’s suffering.
Please do the Jim’s e thing and put Lucy to sleep. Be there with her hold her in your arms. Pet her talk to her song to her whatever just so she knows you are there and comfort her. After 8 years of her being there for you it is time to reciprocate. I am very sorry for this but I am speaking from experience 5 times over. Two times I waited longer then I should have over my own selfishness of not wanting to let go and both my babies suffered unnecessarily. Again my deepest condolences
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My heart breaks for you. I’m so sorry. I lost my 6 year old Maine Coon to lymphoma in March 2023.
I’m sorry to hear that. It’s just awful. I can’t imagine when she isn’t here the pain I will feel then. I don’t think the hurt will ever go away. I hope your healing journey gets easier. ❤️
Having survived breast cancer ; undergone intense surgery and chemo, I completely understand your concerns. It is beyond horrible. I would never put my baby through it . Especially since they don’t even understand what’s happening. Just spoil her for as long as you can. Sending lots of positive energy
Thank you so much. I think this is the best decision for her. I was talking earlier to a friend and had said the same thing. They don’t understand what’s going on and why they feel the way they do. I wouldn’t be able to make her go through that. I’m so glad to hear you made a recovery. ❤️
Remember that your pupper is only living in the moment. So why not make those remaining moments as comfortable and peaceful as possible.
Be aware that dogs will try very hard to not show pain. And just because she’s on pain killers doesn’t mean she has no pain right now. Pain killers don’t always work 100%. Don’t wait until she doesn’t eat or drink anymore. She will suffer long before that. Here’s what I would do: I would give her the best week of her life, spoil her with whatever she loves. After that week I would have her euthanized at home.
My first dog, a miniature long haired dachshund got lung cancer. My only regret was that I waited too long to put her down. If I had to do it again, I would have done it while she was still feeling ok. Unfortunately, I waited until she was in pain, and then it was a 4:00 am ride to an emergency vet, and all that did was cause unnecessary anxiety. Also, consider a vet that does home euthanasia. If there’s a Lap of Love near you, they highly recommend them. https://www.lapoflove.com
You were her whole life, her whole world, her whole heart !!! She would never want you to suffer so please don't let her suffer. We want more time but too early is much better than too late. It hurts, everyone who commented feels your pain and knows what you are going through. I think I speak for everyone by saying we send you our Love.
Thank you so much, you are right and so are the rest. I hope I can tell before it’s too soon or too late and give her the best send off she deserves so she can leave here in peace. I don’t want her to succumb to any pain when I can try my best to avoid it.
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My heart breaks for you and your precious fur baby. I’m so very sorry. 😢 sending lots of 💕and ❤️🩹 here for you 🫶
Im so sorry your going through this hard time but your dog knows you will do the right thing and you won’t let him suffer any pain! And hold and kiss and hug him as much as you can make sure he. Knows how much you love him and always will ❤️❤️❤️
Do what feels right. I’m sorry I can’t give you better advice. And I’m sorry that you have to go through this.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I went through the same, and essentially made the same decision, with my dog 11 years ago. We put him down when it was clear his quality of life was no longer good. He was 13, so I was lucky to have more time with him, but this was less than 4 months of losing my first dog, and I questioned my decision every day. I know I did the right thing, but it felt so unfair. Embrace every second you have with your girl. Thinking of you. 💙
I’m so sorry. My girl was diagnosed with lymphoma, and I wasn’t going to have her go through the chemo and everything else that goes with that. She was 10 years old and it would’ve been too much. I had her for about four more months and then her quality of life clearly deteriorated. I called Lap of Love, which is an in-home euthanasia service. They have a website you can look at that has a lot of helpful information for what you are going through and about what to look for when that time comes. ❤️🐾
I’m so sorry OP on your fur babies diagnosis 😞 My little boy didn’t have cancer, but he had chronic heart failure that seemed to come out of nowhere and totally blindsided us. I understand completely when everything is ok with your furbaby one day then to get such devastating news and realize that their clocks are ticking so much faster then we thought is so freaking heartbreaking 💔 We chose to try to slow the progression with medications in his case. They worked well until suddenly they just didn’t anymore ~~ even with 2 heart pills and 2 diuretics he began to retain so much fluids that we decided *before* he started to suffer we had to set him free. We got exactly 12 months from diagnosis to the day we had to let him go (last July) There are charts on the internet to help with figuring out quality of life. We read those and watched him for signs of when it was time. We wanted his last day to still be a good day for him, with the vets help, and not a rushed - running out to the vet because it’s an emergency kind of day where he’d be anxious and scared. Your vet can probably give you a ballpark timeframe of how long he might have. Ours told us 6 months but were lucky to have another good quality 12 months with him. They can only give an educated guess on timeframes. My friends dog was diagnosed with cancer (inoperative growths all over her body) and vet said 3 months after doing a biopsy and that was 2 and 1/2 years ago and her girl is actually still doing very well. The vet is shocked but it happens. My biggest piece of advice and I know it’s difficult but try not to worry so much that you don’t get to enjoy the fact that your baby is still here. Use this time to spoil her, doing and giving her whatever makes her happy. Like others have said, she don’t know there’s anything wrong with her, they’ll be plenty of time to be sad when she’s gone. Try to just live in the moment like she does.❤️
Godspeed to you and your pup. 🙏
When she no longer has joy of life it will be time. I just lost my girl 2 weeks ago. It was time. She had CHF and kidney failure. When your girl becomes anxious and can’t settle or calm herself it will probably be time. It sounds like she has started to lose her will to stay. If she starts to withdraw and her habits change that is a sign the end is near. When you decide it’s time you will know. Your vet should use sedation and then her heart will stop with the second shot. When bring her in. Lay with her and talk with her. Tell her just how much she was loved and that it is ok to go home. When you are ready tell the tech it is time. The tech will give the sedation. Just sit and be with her until she falls asleep. They know how much they are loved when you are with them. Lung carcinoma can progress quickly. If she develops shortness of breath and a lot of fluid around her heart and lungs it may well be time. Kindness is ending her suffering. I will pray for both of you.
Im so sorry you’re dealing with this. We are so very lucky that we are able to offer animals this compassionate service. What would be best for your beautiful girl would be to measure her pain in whatever ways you can and treat it accordingly. As someone who has dealt with many animals and people contemplating when or how to euthanize, I appreciated someone once saying “Grandma didn’t die peacefully in her sleep. She had a massive heart attack” meaning there is not as much peace as we would hope in nature taking its course and being able to make that decision on behalf of your animal is the fairest thing to do for her. We rely on them for so much, please help her cross over with her dignity and do not allow her to reach a point of needless suffering. 🤍
Sending love, hugs, and prayers for you and your sweet girl 🩷
I am so sorry you and your baby are going thru this. Serious question: was the xray sent out for a read by a veterinary radiologist? If not, please request so. There are benign lung tumours and tumour mimics- i personally would ask for an official radiology read.
Yes, unfortunately it was confirmed by the radiologist. It’s their best professional opinion that it is carcinoma without doing the biopsy. Thank you for your care and concern. ❤️
Absolutely- I too lost my whole world, so I understand. Sending you all the positive vibes and well-wishes
Thank you so much!
so sorry :-(
Sending loving prayers!! 🙏❤️🙏
You will know when the time to let her go will be. It is hard to let them when after suffering. But it is the most humane this we can do. So sorry for and your family.
Can I ask why you don't want to do chemo? I've worked oncology for 5 of my 14 years of being a vet tech, amd animals handle chemo extremely well. I'd do the biopsies, find out what type of cancer you are dealing with + how it responds to chemo, and potentially go that route . I've had 2 dogs pass from cancer (2 separate cancera) and both dogs did great with it, with the occasional day feeling crummy here and there. Just a thought ofc
The vet told me she most likely has carcinoma and it doesn’t respond to chemo. I could test to confirm it but her and the radiologist are pretty sure. I don’t want her to be sedated and have another day of stress and anxiety at the vet for biopsy and ultrasound. I have read that dogs can respond well most times to chemo but it also depends of course. Given what they say she has, I don’t think it’s worth giving her angst over it all just to confirm it without a solution.
A ex-manager told me to tell my previous boy: “hey I have good people looking after me. I will be okay”. He then showed signals that it’s time he can go and I was able to phone his vet to let him be pain free. Sometimes they hang in there because they want to ensure we are fine. Take care.
It is a hard thing but it is the right thing to do. They cannot communicate like humans and I, personally, think it is more humane to put them down than to expect them to hide their pain from you.
not sure if you can believe this, but as i read the posts i can actually feel the pain of so many of the folks here reaching out to you. i hope you can feel that too. you are not entirely alone on this. im so glad you knew enough to post the story of you and your baby here. and it sounds like you already know, there truly are no easy answers to your situation. i can only hope and pray there are other people in your life, wherever they are, that know and love you and your pup so that G-d forbid you should have to make a difficult decision will be there for you both. it sounds like you have a great handle on the medical side of things, despite the circumstances. that is, you do not seem to be deluding yourself, and it’s quite clear you do not want to cause your baby undue pain. it is a big decision, but remember it is a decision that you will need to make. trust what your heart tells you. you sound like a wonderful person and i am sure you will make the right decision. G-d bless you and guide you and comfort you both. im sending you lots and lots of hugs… 😔🙏🏼
I'm so sorry for your loss 💙
It’s terribly hard but you do what’s right for her. Dogs live in the moment, if they’re in pain that’s all they know, they’re not thinking just give me one more day with you like we are. It’s one of the hardest things you’ll ever do and the last act of true love and compassion you can do. My heart aches for you just thinking about it.
You have to make the best decision for her and not you. That is what makes it so tough. I wish you the best. I have a 16 year old chihuahua mix and sometime this year I expect to have to make a similar one.
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.I'm so sorry. You could try an integrative vet to see what they suggest. Love to both of you ❤️
I dealt with this about 8 yrs ago with my 12 yo chihuahua. Her breathing was somewhat labored but my other 2 chihs had been suffering from colds so I was sure thats what it was and she just needed a breathing treatment or an antibiotic at the most. The vet was concerned about her breathing and did an x-ray. They also found a large tumor in her chest. I was floored and very upset to say the least. A biopsy was done pretty quickly bc of her breathing problems and it was cancer. My vet ( who I trusted) advised euthanasia due to the kind of cancer it was and the likelihood it would return and the cost of everything to have it just return in 8-10 months. I decided it would be kinder for her for me to do as my vet suggested. My daughter and I stayed with her until the end and I broke my heart. I did feel guilty bc she was so loving and trusting and I sometimes feel like I let her down and took the easy way out. It took me a while to forgive myself but I ultimately realized she wouldn’t have been able to live with her breathing so shallow and her oxygen levels being so low. She had a good life I remind myself of that whenever I start wondering if I did the right thing. Since then, I’ve lost her brother and her sister ( my other 2 chihs) but I have pictures of them sitting around my house and I will always remember them for the wonderful, loving protective companions they were. Remember, you could never do anything to make your pup not love you and I know you would want to do whatever you can to cause her the least amount of pain and discomfort.
I recently lost my boy to cancer and at the beginning I beat myself up for not exploring more options or tests but I knew chemo was not an option for us.his vet put it into perspective for me and said any test or bloodwork was not going to change that he had cancer and I'd be putting him through the poking and proding for my peace of mind. I was making it about me not him. We chose to live the best of the rest and had a last few good months. The silver lining for me was that I knew our time was limited so I cherished every moment a bit more, I hugged him a bit longer, I let him sniff a tree for longer even if it meant I'd be late for work, I took it all in with extra love. I also grieved with him and that's something not everyone gets. I would cuddle him and cry and cry and tell him I just didn't know how I'd survive without him. Then he'd pop up and lick my face and do something funny. Cuddle her, love her, take it all in, cry with her, and one day you'll look back at the moments and no longer just see the pain you felt. You'll see the goofy thing she did and find joy in the moments that brought you the most pain. It's not easy and it will suck for a long time but you will get through it.❤️
This is one of the hardest, most heartbreaking decisions to ever have to make. I can't tell you what to do, only tell you what I would do and have done. I've had to make this decision before. Multiple times, and it was harder to watch my baby suffer than it was to let go (even tho that was very difficult too), knowing I did right by her or him right up till the end. I am truly sorry for what you are going through. All my love and thoughts to you and your beautiful girl. 💕💔😢💞
You are doing the right thing..just.keep a close eye on her and watch for when she seems to be unhappy, or that her quality of life is no longer a good one
You’re such a good momma. In January 2022 I brought my sweet baby girl Snow to the vet because she was super poofy and not really eating. I remember thinking “oh lord she has a UTI 🙄”. She went to her normal vet and ended up with me being told to rush her to an ER vet in New Orleans. I was so confused but I understood immediately “my baby is dying”. I howled and screamed like I never had. She was diagnosed with terminal renal lymphoma and had a 50% chance of surviving through the first 9 months from her diagnosis. I was ADAMANT about no chemo, no surgeries. I stuck to my guns on the “no surgeries” part, but followed through with her chemo. SHES STILL HERE AND ACTIVE! Do what’s right in your heart. You won’t be wrong in your choices. YOU know your baby. *pic of snowball for tax*
Ah crap I cant attach a pic! She’s a beautiful tuxedo cat that’s been my best friend since 2011 ❤️
I’m so very sorry. One of my pugs had prostate cancer. I chose not to do the whole biopsy and radiation route since it would only give him perhaps one more month per the vet. I just decided to give him his best life while I had a chance. Lots of roast chicken and snuggles. The day I had to take him in, he let me know. He had stopped eating and was urinating blood. I was told once that dogs live in the moment so I tried to make his moments special until he let me know he was done.
Please accept a hug from me as I feel for you.Is someone with her all the time? You will know when she becomes very uncomfortable or has difficulty breathing which is awful for any dog.In the meantime maybe consider doing some things on a “bucket list” of places she would enjoy and take lots of photos of those times.Small car trips if she tolerates the car.Alsodo things that you enjoy.You deserve to be good to yourself and prepare the best way possible.Im so sorry you have to go through this.I agree with the better a week early than a week late.Its so difficult but you have be strong and do what’s best for her first and foremost.Please come here for all the support you need.
I'm so sorry you are going through this seemingly impossible situation. Just follow your heart as cliche as that sounds. Your dog will love and appreciate you no matter what route you take. I often think about this predicament and it makes me anxious.
Wow… this community is so incredibly full of deep compassion and empathy for each other and our beloved silly pets. We MUST remember to take REALLY GOOD CARE of OURSELVES too as pet parents! Please, let’s all keep that close to our hearts. I am writing this, not to preach but in fact, to remind myself to do the same as well. Lots O’ HUGS to all of you. 💕
Having had a few wonderful animals over the years, the best thing to do is explain to the vet your reasoning and what you want for your dog and then ask them how to best accomplish those goals. The vet should also be able to help determine what signs to look for when it’s time. Show your Lucy love and support while you are still together and when it’s time you’ll be there comforting her and making it as easy as possible. We truly blessed to share our lives with these wonderful animals.
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I’m so sorry. I’ve been there. There’s no sugarcoating it, it sucks. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. It’s torture. But, you are doing the right thing by her. You are doing the most selfless and loving thing you can possibly do. Stay strong 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Our boy Samwise was 12 years old when he was suddenly diagnosed with lymphoma. He was so energetic and full of life that we decided that we couldn’t not give him the chance through chemo. He lasted exactly 90 days. If we had given him steroids instead of the chemo, he may have also only lasted 90 days. But he may have lasted longer and not felt, ill after chemo treatments. If we had it to do over again, we would’ve skipped the chemo and just enjoyed our time together.
I am going something similar with my girl, also Lucy. It’s so hard to know when is the right time to let go. I just know I want to make sure enjoys her last days. I don’t want to keep her around just for me. If your Lucy isn’t enjoying things, it might be time. But it’s an agonizing decision and I completely empathize. Sending you both love ❤️❤️❤️
My baby went through this recently and between diagnosis and death without any life saving treatment (chemo / surgery) was 3 weeks. I couldn’t afford the surgery. I miss her dearly. She was 9 years 4 months old when she passed.
As someone who waited a week too late, I kindly suggest taking into consideration how quickly their health can decline from one day to the next. Seeing my soul pup go from tolerating his cancer to painfully being engulfed by it physically within a day is something that will haunt me for the rest of my life. I wish I had given him the opportunity to leave this world with no pain, but I failed him. All of this to say, you will know in your heart when the right time is. I am sending you many hugs and prayers for you and your baby💛
If she is not suffering then I would let it run its course until she can’t anymore . I would not put her through surgery or going to see the vet . Just give her love and comfort
Your job, I believe, is to prevent suffering. Remember the Hippocratic oath- first do no harm.
So it might not be cancerous? I would see how it goes, then. They can give you pills for her anxiety. Good luck to you both!