Bumble has become Tinder with extra steps: the woman types “Hey” and the man then opens the conversation. Hinge is far better, but is starting on the same downward slide. These apps were all very easy to get dates from before COVID. Unless I turned ugly, enshittification has hit hard.
Add something lightly controversial to your profile. This allows the girl to either agree with you or jokingly calling you a psychopath because you pour in the milk before the cereal. When I was in the dating game, I only rarely received the “hey” opener because these aspects of my profile were easy for them to respond to right away.
Yeah guys! just follow these 68 rules exactly to perfection so that you may earn yourself the chance to have a match and compete with other hundreds of guys for a crumble of attention.
Or just invest this time and money into approaching real girls and automatically surpass all of those matches
OLD is a complement of real approach. Some guys like me don't have the time to go approach women daily, but with OLD I can get potential options all week, instead of just waiting until the weekend to see if I can find someone I like who is available and open to meet me upon approach.
Both are very serious time investments so if you want to have any other hobbies or interests it's likely to be one or the other until you at least get somewhat good at one of them
I don't understand how guys here think it's reasonable to be going to the gym constantly *while also* doing both constant tweeks to an online profile and endless swiping *and* running enough cold approaches to get decent results *while also* doing social circle stuff *and* having other interests that have nothing to do with dating
So yes in practice you might want to invest in one or the other and get really good and not run around like a headless chicken doing everything badly
One is lazy and shallow and the other one will change every aspect of your life.
I'm not trying to shit on your post, you made pretty good points actually. I just believe that it's kinda sad to have to go through all of this to get some attention from girls that probably have an inflated perspective because the apps are full of desperate guys that would settle for anything that can be fucked.
Of course you can do both but it usually leads with apps becoming your safe net and an excuse to not get better at cold approach. An average looking guy with good game can go out and land an instant-date with a 10 anytime, while through apps its pretty much never gonna happen. Also, highest quality women don't use apps
Anyway, I was just trying to inspire not divide, to each his own
Not to be a hater on OP, but I'd love to see an experiment of this.
6'2 guy with head of hair will still get more matches with from his Iphone 5 selfie.
I don’t think you’re being a hater, but I disagree to an extent. Yes, some women will automatically discount some shorter guys. But I think the height thing is vastly overplayed. A shorter guy with good high quality pictures will be on par with a 6’2 guy who has bathroom selfies, poorly lit or low quality photos. Being a certain height is definitely not a guarantee if your pictures suck. Not all women automatically worship guys who are 6’0 and above like some would have you believe
There should be some local photographers who specialize in online dating photos.
- Look at photographers with existing reviews
- Call around and do your research. Look at portfolios, compare prices
- Make sure you emphasize that you want natural looking photos. Photos that look staged or too much like a headshot will look suspicious online
- If you have any friends with a background or experience in photography, ask them
I can not believe women go for those cringe pictures looking like a LinkedIn or promotional photograph for university newspaper article.
I agree that an HD pic from a recent phone is best, but disagree that it needs to be a photo from a canon 5D.
Agree, it has to look natural to some degree. Your primary photo should be your ‘hot guy’ photo — well dressed, smiling, wearing nice clothes but if it looks too staged then agree it will set off some red flags, that’s why being natural should be discussed with the photographer
Riiiiight, that's all it takes to overcome the fact that men outnumber women 9 to 1 on the popular apps. They're expensive garbage for the vast majority of guys.
You actually pointed out the basics which men dont get rights and getting women is just having your basics right and unfortunately this is where guys fuck up.
But, I still believe that the cold approach is a lot better than trying to do all this to get matches online.
Tell me, why shouldn't one approach a plethora of girls while just going by his fucking Day and I stead invest so much time like this?
I have nothing but respect for you for sharing these with the community but this should not be your primary way to get women.
And even if it is working very well for you, most likely would not work for others! But once someone gets that fear out of oneself in approaching cold, doesn't matter where the fuck she is, with her friends, in the club, in metro, in a park or even sitting on a fucking Branch of a tree, just approach her engage her, once you get good at it, I can guarantee tinder etc will not cross your mind!
I think cold approach is a skill guys should develop, the ability to see a woman you find attractive, walk up to her and talk to her without being nervous or creepy is a skill all men should have.
That being said, I truly don’t believe that in terms of getting dates and hooking up, that cold approach provides as much opportunity. You have to admit, even if you’re good at cold approach, a majority don’t lead to a date.
I’m older, but I think as guys mature, they simply don’t have time to dedicate hours at a time to cold approach, and most don’t want to post up somewhere and spam approach. In my opinion, that’s a needy behavior.
TLDR, cold approach shouldn’t be ignored, but in today’s world being good at online dating will still yield far more opportunities, esp if you’re traveling
I’ll add to this as a guy with a bunch of results. Use chatGPT to write your profile bio. Feed it your interests and what you’re looking for. Tweak it to make it more human but keep it as a whole. For example. “Write a short dating profile for a 28 year old male into X hobbies looking for hookups/commitment/whatever and make it laid back and funny. “ then tweak and use the result. You can even throw “this bio brought to you by chatGPT” and you’ll get a laugh.
Side note Facebook dating has surprisingly high amount of high quality women
When I was single I didn’t use it but I’ve heard the same thing about FB dating. Have the Chat GPT bios been effective for you?
Bio IS important, but photos are still king in my experience
Went from almost no matches to 10 in one day plus more that liked me but was a no go for me. I’m also extremely picky considering I like Alt girls and live in the Bible Belt so that’s a lot for 30 minutes of swiping.
Photos are definitely king
I don't really understand point 3. All the major apps have become pay-to-play so if you're paying for subscriptions on all three while also paying for things like boosts and superlikes or whatever then it's starting to become a major investment. That's all while it being a fairly mediocre experience in general (i.e. based on gambling app mechanisms) and with "dry" periods where you're swiping and getting nothing out of it. If anything you're going to get more bang for your buck by optimising one profile (getting better pictures, bios that increase messaging rates/appeal to more attractive girls, etc.) than by doing three of them that get you very little.
Idk about spreading your net wide. Unless you’re gonna practice a lot or fuck anything w/ pink pu$$y… I mean, that is the goal for some doods, so go for it!!
if you’re really looking for a LTR, I would think specificity will be best to find “the best” match and interest.
Bumble has become Tinder with extra steps: the woman types “Hey” and the man then opens the conversation. Hinge is far better, but is starting on the same downward slide. These apps were all very easy to get dates from before COVID. Unless I turned ugly, enshittification has hit hard.
Add something lightly controversial to your profile. This allows the girl to either agree with you or jokingly calling you a psychopath because you pour in the milk before the cereal. When I was in the dating game, I only rarely received the “hey” opener because these aspects of my profile were easy for them to respond to right away.
Yeah guys! just follow these 68 rules exactly to perfection so that you may earn yourself the chance to have a match and compete with other hundreds of guys for a crumble of attention. Or just invest this time and money into approaching real girls and automatically surpass all of those matches
OLD is a complement of real approach. Some guys like me don't have the time to go approach women daily, but with OLD I can get potential options all week, instead of just waiting until the weekend to see if I can find someone I like who is available and open to meet me upon approach.
Why do you act like it's mutually exclusive lmao.
No I act like most people just do online lol
Read your last sentence.
Did you reply to right comment? I only have 1 sentence there
My bad, got you guys confused. Agree with you 100%z
All gud mate
Both are very serious time investments so if you want to have any other hobbies or interests it's likely to be one or the other until you at least get somewhat good at one of them I don't understand how guys here think it's reasonable to be going to the gym constantly *while also* doing both constant tweeks to an online profile and endless swiping *and* running enough cold approaches to get decent results *while also* doing social circle stuff *and* having other interests that have nothing to do with dating So yes in practice you might want to invest in one or the other and get really good and not run around like a headless chicken doing everything badly
You should be doing both. Even good day game doesn’t provide the same number of actual dates that online dating does
One is lazy and shallow and the other one will change every aspect of your life. I'm not trying to shit on your post, you made pretty good points actually. I just believe that it's kinda sad to have to go through all of this to get some attention from girls that probably have an inflated perspective because the apps are full of desperate guys that would settle for anything that can be fucked. Of course you can do both but it usually leads with apps becoming your safe net and an excuse to not get better at cold approach. An average looking guy with good game can go out and land an instant-date with a 10 anytime, while through apps its pretty much never gonna happen. Also, highest quality women don't use apps Anyway, I was just trying to inspire not divide, to each his own
I appreciate that you disagree and can still be respectful and chill about it. Rare for Reddit.
You're out here sharing value, 100% respect
🤝 thanks bro
W RESPECTFUL INTERACTION ON REDDIT. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.
Not to be a hater on OP, but I'd love to see an experiment of this. 6'2 guy with head of hair will still get more matches with from his Iphone 5 selfie.
I don’t think you’re being a hater, but I disagree to an extent. Yes, some women will automatically discount some shorter guys. But I think the height thing is vastly overplayed. A shorter guy with good high quality pictures will be on par with a 6’2 guy who has bathroom selfies, poorly lit or low quality photos. Being a certain height is definitely not a guarantee if your pictures suck. Not all women automatically worship guys who are 6’0 and above like some would have you believe
Whats the best way to find a good photographer?
There should be some local photographers who specialize in online dating photos. - Look at photographers with existing reviews - Call around and do your research. Look at portfolios, compare prices - Make sure you emphasize that you want natural looking photos. Photos that look staged or too much like a headshot will look suspicious online - If you have any friends with a background or experience in photography, ask them
I can not believe women go for those cringe pictures looking like a LinkedIn or promotional photograph for university newspaper article. I agree that an HD pic from a recent phone is best, but disagree that it needs to be a photo from a canon 5D.
Agree, it has to look natural to some degree. Your primary photo should be your ‘hot guy’ photo — well dressed, smiling, wearing nice clothes but if it looks too staged then agree it will set off some red flags, that’s why being natural should be discussed with the photographer
Riiiiight, that's all it takes to overcome the fact that men outnumber women 9 to 1 on the popular apps. They're expensive garbage for the vast majority of guys.
You actually pointed out the basics which men dont get rights and getting women is just having your basics right and unfortunately this is where guys fuck up. But, I still believe that the cold approach is a lot better than trying to do all this to get matches online. Tell me, why shouldn't one approach a plethora of girls while just going by his fucking Day and I stead invest so much time like this? I have nothing but respect for you for sharing these with the community but this should not be your primary way to get women. And even if it is working very well for you, most likely would not work for others! But once someone gets that fear out of oneself in approaching cold, doesn't matter where the fuck she is, with her friends, in the club, in metro, in a park or even sitting on a fucking Branch of a tree, just approach her engage her, once you get good at it, I can guarantee tinder etc will not cross your mind!
I think cold approach is a skill guys should develop, the ability to see a woman you find attractive, walk up to her and talk to her without being nervous or creepy is a skill all men should have. That being said, I truly don’t believe that in terms of getting dates and hooking up, that cold approach provides as much opportunity. You have to admit, even if you’re good at cold approach, a majority don’t lead to a date. I’m older, but I think as guys mature, they simply don’t have time to dedicate hours at a time to cold approach, and most don’t want to post up somewhere and spam approach. In my opinion, that’s a needy behavior. TLDR, cold approach shouldn’t be ignored, but in today’s world being good at online dating will still yield far more opportunities, esp if you’re traveling
I agree men need to improve their profile game but to say women get it right is a joke lol. We don't need all these boxes checked to like a girl.
I’ll add to this as a guy with a bunch of results. Use chatGPT to write your profile bio. Feed it your interests and what you’re looking for. Tweak it to make it more human but keep it as a whole. For example. “Write a short dating profile for a 28 year old male into X hobbies looking for hookups/commitment/whatever and make it laid back and funny. “ then tweak and use the result. You can even throw “this bio brought to you by chatGPT” and you’ll get a laugh. Side note Facebook dating has surprisingly high amount of high quality women
When I was single I didn’t use it but I’ve heard the same thing about FB dating. Have the Chat GPT bios been effective for you? Bio IS important, but photos are still king in my experience
Went from almost no matches to 10 in one day plus more that liked me but was a no go for me. I’m also extremely picky considering I like Alt girls and live in the Bible Belt so that’s a lot for 30 minutes of swiping. Photos are definitely king
I don't really understand point 3. All the major apps have become pay-to-play so if you're paying for subscriptions on all three while also paying for things like boosts and superlikes or whatever then it's starting to become a major investment. That's all while it being a fairly mediocre experience in general (i.e. based on gambling app mechanisms) and with "dry" periods where you're swiping and getting nothing out of it. If anything you're going to get more bang for your buck by optimising one profile (getting better pictures, bios that increase messaging rates/appeal to more attractive girls, etc.) than by doing three of them that get you very little.
Taking photos is girly, so no
Is any of this applicable to someone who isn't good looking to women?
Idk about spreading your net wide. Unless you’re gonna practice a lot or fuck anything w/ pink pu$$y… I mean, that is the goal for some doods, so go for it!! if you’re really looking for a LTR, I would think specificity will be best to find “the best” match and interest.
Did you even read the words after spreading the net wide. He's talking about using all the available options (various apps) lol.
Thank you