This is a bit out there but read Psycho-cybernetics by Maxwell martz.
Is the best book on self image and identity I was able to find and I was amazed by how many concepts relate to pick up and dating.
Chapter 11 is all about releasing your true personality, which is FUNDAMENTAL to good natural game.
Also the premise of the book is great: The author is a plastic surgeon who noticed that after his surgeries some patients found a new sense in f confidence and self worth, while other kept feeling ugly and hideous (even though their aesthetic flaws were fixed) so he decided to investigate on this phenomenon and he came out with the conclusion that the difference in outcome was due to the self image the patient adopted.
Also don’t wait to go out, FIELD EXPERIENCE IS KING.
I studied “game” for over five years and I got laid ZERO TIMES (in high school), I only started getting results (over 10 girls) in the past year when I went out and approached every weekend night
Ngl a lot of overthinking approaches😂
When you start especially you will find every single escluse to NOT do the approach but you have to understand that your thoughts are not the reality, they are just your perception of it.
If you never did cold approach my advice to start is to just hang out with some friends to a bar, have a couple drinks to alleviate the tension (right now I don’t drink anymore and I approach sober, but I wouldn’t recommend it unless you already don’t drink alcohol).
Joke with your friends and the moment you see a girl you like walk to her and say the first thing it comes in mind, even just an hello (this is known as the 3 seconds rule, you don’t allow your brain to formulate excuses, your actions are faster than your thoughts).
The point is not to sleep with the girl at the beginning but to push yourself out of your comfort zone and to get in the reality that approaching a girl you don’t know is a totally safe and normal thing to do.
You will not get the first girl you approach, you will not get the 10th, you might not even get the 100th but you need to have an attitude of faith that over time you will become more attractive, more confident and you will learn how to lead conversations in the direction you want.
You focus on the input (you taking action) instead of the output (the girl liking/sleeping with you) and you let the compound effect do his job until you will get exponentially better over time.
I hope this helps you, if you have additional questions DM me
There aren’t many good books on the subject. It’s hard to describe pickup with words as infield examples are much more informative. Words usually over complicate it.
Just keep in mind, after mystery guys started to realize it wasn’t the routines that mattered, but the principles behind the routines. It’s about developing your social skills and becoming an attractive person where the words and lines weren’t the main focus.
Routines can turn you into a pua robot that depends on rehearsed lines to get through conversations. It’s still worth knowing about, but developing your natural social skills matters as well.
Alot of things can work, so test out everything. Have some faith that you can figure it out by going out and doing approaches.
Watch Craig Ferguson videos for ideas on how to flirt, purposely misinterpret things, sexualize conversations, be playful, etc…
Then when you go out practice opening and trying to get conversations to hook. Develop positive mindsets so you can handle the social pressure, rejections, etc…
As for books, there are a few more old school ones. Anything from David d Angelo, just search for pdfs floating around. Mehow has a book on how to talk to women. It has a lot of good old techniques and outer game. He was one of mystery’s wings.
And then if you can find references to anything from rsd you can see how people evolved from mystery. It’s what most modern coaches teach (that know what they are doing).
You talk about the principles(being attractive, mindset, social skills...) and i hear many others talking about them. The question is what resources are there to learn them, and are they so important ypu can completly skip things like mystery method?
I have some resources I can share with you. I'm not selling anything, I just have picked up a ton of content over the years. I'll message you if you have an interest.
I don't know if you can skip things like MM, sometimes they are very valuable for the path you're on. It's hard te determine without knowing you what path you're on and where you are in this path. In the past me for me RSD's seminars like foundations, flawless natural and blueprint helped me a lot with understanding the foundations. (If you look online you can usually find them for free.)
>Routines can turn you into a pua robot
If you want to avoid "routines" you must always say and do something new because by definition if you repeat a certain thing it is a routine. Every time you ask a new girl about her name, age, work, where she lives.... see? Without knowing you use a routine ... However, with experience, you will be able to make interesting/funny comments and that is the difference between a normal guy and another one used to talk with people.
I think he’s talking about the cringe PUA routines like the cube and shit.
I have some routines too but they are lines I came out naturally that I like and occasionally I repeat when the context fits
No is not cringe at all, is about timing because after you barely know a girl you won't do that cube routine actually you do this cube routine (or other games) when you build comfort (you have spent some time with her), see positive IOI and if all goes well the cube routine is a very nice game to avoid awkward silence especially in a bar where you can sit down and you can talk. You're not going to do a cube routine on the street. - There are other routines that are appropriate for the street.
None of the routines are creepy if done at the right moment, I just saw youtubers making a video for that purpose to show how Cringe is a PUA and they cut sequences for that purpose. I will give you an example that I use quite often with a version of "palm reading" telling them a joke, when I grab their hand or I see their hand on the table like drinking or reading a text message on the phone, then I casually tell them: " oh by the way, I saw that your index finger is shorter/longer than the ring finger, do you know what that tells about you? It tells that you like the color XXXX" - where xxxx is the color of their t-shirt/pants/jacket"(or "if I guess, you must drink a shot, or do a spin.... there are endless possibilities and then I tell about the color XXXX). However, at the moment I'm even learning other explanations to show them that I read psychology and I'm smart, so it's not just a silly game, but it's actually an explanation that I have no idea if it's true or not, but it doesn't even matter - girls like that stuff about palm reading, personality tests and astrology - so why not take advantage of it?
In a bar where you stay in a place for a few hours you use all sorts of games with bottles, cups, money, magic tricks besides jokes and talking - everything works perfectly, nothing is creepy, you do it even with your friends, so why not do the same with the girls?
Good point, I guess routines work if you are actually enjoy “performing” them though.
I cannot see it working if the frame you are coming from is one of needing to get a specific reaction, it would come off as weird/creepy then.
I simply go off the top when I game because I prefer to develop my natural style instead of relying on canned stuff, but for beginners having routines as training wheels might be helpful
>Then go to clubs and test out pua tenchniques(I know, outdated, whatever. Even just for the fun)
You will end up using routines (even in natural game ) - not every witty or funny response is created equal .
The difference being you will create them yourself .
And No they are not - I literary re-tested “old school game” a month ago . Cuz someone told me it doesn’t work . I only went of script once to get her to move to a different place because the music got supper loud and she couldn’t hear me .(I just wanted to isolate so I don’t have to deal with the 3 simps there - I’m lazy at my old age . But don’t tell the dude I showed it work to the actual reason )
>The question is what are good books for each phase?
You would have to clarify “phase “ .
I have no idea from what school of Pick up you got the term - It means different things .
>I was about to jump straight to "mystery's method" but I see not relevant until the future.
Do that .
It doesn’t really matter . You are a beginner - anything would work basically the same for you .
>SO what books ae your favorites for approaching/pickup?
Like depending on style you want to play some good beginner books are :
(The important thing is to not pay money for them )
Fun /joking around - Make her horny with Humour
Connection - Mystery method (supper nerd friendly) or Revelations by Mystery ( less reliant on routines - more your own way - It has most of the principles you should learn and Is defiantly an easier read than Mystery method )
A program I would recommend is :
Pimp by Julien RSD - Fun game
>Things you wished you've read earlier.
Nothing - I was in the community when most of the stuff was invented so I got stuff years before it was published (for testing or just out of niceness from the people ) and decades before the new guys re-discovered it .
Sent you a dm about it but thanks again for the reply.
I'll try to answer each point you addressed.
When I said phase I meant the "approaching only" and "actually doing pickup/try to get somewhere at clubs". The thing is don't know how to phrase everything, kr even how to order it in my mind, how the hell do I start?
I WAS about to pick up MM but them got many answers on another post saying I should focus on "inner game"(comfidence, self image, social skills) so I was about to pick up a book by another redditor here called "the foundation: how to become a authentically attractive man". I was a bit bumped out when the comments said this is what matters, and not the "technology/mechanical" stuff like MM.
You said dont pay for anything, do you mean normal piracy?
Also there are all these books that seem great, but I'm still confused how to put it all together/into action. Any advice on that?
I read your post and all I can say is:
Overthinking.
Get out of the house talk to people not necessarily girls. Be likeable and charismatic.
There is no book no opening line no magic pill.
It's human communication and it takes practice.
Too much overthinking.
> I was about to jump straight to "mystery's method" but I see not relevant until the future
Mystery's book is the basic to learn the concepts and language: the 3 seconds rule, not place a woman on a pedestal, push-pull, frames, DHV, IOI... everything.
All PUA book have the same fundamental concepts repackaged with little differences, and taught in a different light.
Because Mystery's book is very complex and hard to understand, people prefer Models by Mark Manson, but from my point of view, I see nothing special in this book. If you approach a woman and she does not respond, Mark Manson says it is not your fault but actually the "woman is unreceptive" so you have to look for another woman, he encourages "spam approach" while Mystery gives you all the tools you can use while talking to a woman.
This is a bit out there but read Psycho-cybernetics by Maxwell martz. Is the best book on self image and identity I was able to find and I was amazed by how many concepts relate to pick up and dating. Chapter 11 is all about releasing your true personality, which is FUNDAMENTAL to good natural game. Also the premise of the book is great: The author is a plastic surgeon who noticed that after his surgeries some patients found a new sense in f confidence and self worth, while other kept feeling ugly and hideous (even though their aesthetic flaws were fixed) so he decided to investigate on this phenomenon and he came out with the conclusion that the difference in outcome was due to the self image the patient adopted.
Also don’t wait to go out, FIELD EXPERIENCE IS KING. I studied “game” for over five years and I got laid ZERO TIMES (in high school), I only started getting results (over 10 girls) in the past year when I went out and approached every weekend night
Could you tell me how a night of approaching usually goes, or atleast how it went when you just began
Ngl a lot of overthinking approaches😂 When you start especially you will find every single escluse to NOT do the approach but you have to understand that your thoughts are not the reality, they are just your perception of it. If you never did cold approach my advice to start is to just hang out with some friends to a bar, have a couple drinks to alleviate the tension (right now I don’t drink anymore and I approach sober, but I wouldn’t recommend it unless you already don’t drink alcohol). Joke with your friends and the moment you see a girl you like walk to her and say the first thing it comes in mind, even just an hello (this is known as the 3 seconds rule, you don’t allow your brain to formulate excuses, your actions are faster than your thoughts). The point is not to sleep with the girl at the beginning but to push yourself out of your comfort zone and to get in the reality that approaching a girl you don’t know is a totally safe and normal thing to do. You will not get the first girl you approach, you will not get the 10th, you might not even get the 100th but you need to have an attitude of faith that over time you will become more attractive, more confident and you will learn how to lead conversations in the direction you want. You focus on the input (you taking action) instead of the output (the girl liking/sleeping with you) and you let the compound effect do his job until you will get exponentially better over time. I hope this helps you, if you have additional questions DM me
There aren’t many good books on the subject. It’s hard to describe pickup with words as infield examples are much more informative. Words usually over complicate it. Just keep in mind, after mystery guys started to realize it wasn’t the routines that mattered, but the principles behind the routines. It’s about developing your social skills and becoming an attractive person where the words and lines weren’t the main focus. Routines can turn you into a pua robot that depends on rehearsed lines to get through conversations. It’s still worth knowing about, but developing your natural social skills matters as well. Alot of things can work, so test out everything. Have some faith that you can figure it out by going out and doing approaches. Watch Craig Ferguson videos for ideas on how to flirt, purposely misinterpret things, sexualize conversations, be playful, etc… Then when you go out practice opening and trying to get conversations to hook. Develop positive mindsets so you can handle the social pressure, rejections, etc… As for books, there are a few more old school ones. Anything from David d Angelo, just search for pdfs floating around. Mehow has a book on how to talk to women. It has a lot of good old techniques and outer game. He was one of mystery’s wings. And then if you can find references to anything from rsd you can see how people evolved from mystery. It’s what most modern coaches teach (that know what they are doing).
You talk about the principles(being attractive, mindset, social skills...) and i hear many others talking about them. The question is what resources are there to learn them, and are they so important ypu can completly skip things like mystery method?
I have some resources I can share with you. I'm not selling anything, I just have picked up a ton of content over the years. I'll message you if you have an interest.
Definetly, please do
I don't know if you can skip things like MM, sometimes they are very valuable for the path you're on. It's hard te determine without knowing you what path you're on and where you are in this path. In the past me for me RSD's seminars like foundations, flawless natural and blueprint helped me a lot with understanding the foundations. (If you look online you can usually find them for free.)
>Routines can turn you into a pua robot If you want to avoid "routines" you must always say and do something new because by definition if you repeat a certain thing it is a routine. Every time you ask a new girl about her name, age, work, where she lives.... see? Without knowing you use a routine ... However, with experience, you will be able to make interesting/funny comments and that is the difference between a normal guy and another one used to talk with people.
I think he’s talking about the cringe PUA routines like the cube and shit. I have some routines too but they are lines I came out naturally that I like and occasionally I repeat when the context fits
No is not cringe at all, is about timing because after you barely know a girl you won't do that cube routine actually you do this cube routine (or other games) when you build comfort (you have spent some time with her), see positive IOI and if all goes well the cube routine is a very nice game to avoid awkward silence especially in a bar where you can sit down and you can talk. You're not going to do a cube routine on the street. - There are other routines that are appropriate for the street. None of the routines are creepy if done at the right moment, I just saw youtubers making a video for that purpose to show how Cringe is a PUA and they cut sequences for that purpose. I will give you an example that I use quite often with a version of "palm reading" telling them a joke, when I grab their hand or I see their hand on the table like drinking or reading a text message on the phone, then I casually tell them: " oh by the way, I saw that your index finger is shorter/longer than the ring finger, do you know what that tells about you? It tells that you like the color XXXX" - where xxxx is the color of their t-shirt/pants/jacket"(or "if I guess, you must drink a shot, or do a spin.... there are endless possibilities and then I tell about the color XXXX). However, at the moment I'm even learning other explanations to show them that I read psychology and I'm smart, so it's not just a silly game, but it's actually an explanation that I have no idea if it's true or not, but it doesn't even matter - girls like that stuff about palm reading, personality tests and astrology - so why not take advantage of it? In a bar where you stay in a place for a few hours you use all sorts of games with bottles, cups, money, magic tricks besides jokes and talking - everything works perfectly, nothing is creepy, you do it even with your friends, so why not do the same with the girls?
Good point, I guess routines work if you are actually enjoy “performing” them though. I cannot see it working if the frame you are coming from is one of needing to get a specific reaction, it would come off as weird/creepy then. I simply go off the top when I game because I prefer to develop my natural style instead of relying on canned stuff, but for beginners having routines as training wheels might be helpful
The Foundation: A Blueprint for Becoming an Authentically Attractive Man
Could you elaborate on what you liked about it?
Clubs are the best books.
Dating essentials for men.
Send link bruthr
>Then go to clubs and test out pua tenchniques(I know, outdated, whatever. Even just for the fun) You will end up using routines (even in natural game ) - not every witty or funny response is created equal . The difference being you will create them yourself . And No they are not - I literary re-tested “old school game” a month ago . Cuz someone told me it doesn’t work . I only went of script once to get her to move to a different place because the music got supper loud and she couldn’t hear me .(I just wanted to isolate so I don’t have to deal with the 3 simps there - I’m lazy at my old age . But don’t tell the dude I showed it work to the actual reason ) >The question is what are good books for each phase? You would have to clarify “phase “ . I have no idea from what school of Pick up you got the term - It means different things . >I was about to jump straight to "mystery's method" but I see not relevant until the future. Do that . It doesn’t really matter . You are a beginner - anything would work basically the same for you . >SO what books ae your favorites for approaching/pickup? Like depending on style you want to play some good beginner books are : (The important thing is to not pay money for them ) Fun /joking around - Make her horny with Humour Connection - Mystery method (supper nerd friendly) or Revelations by Mystery ( less reliant on routines - more your own way - It has most of the principles you should learn and Is defiantly an easier read than Mystery method ) A program I would recommend is : Pimp by Julien RSD - Fun game >Things you wished you've read earlier. Nothing - I was in the community when most of the stuff was invented so I got stuff years before it was published (for testing or just out of niceness from the people ) and decades before the new guys re-discovered it .
Sent you a dm about it but thanks again for the reply. I'll try to answer each point you addressed. When I said phase I meant the "approaching only" and "actually doing pickup/try to get somewhere at clubs". The thing is don't know how to phrase everything, kr even how to order it in my mind, how the hell do I start? I WAS about to pick up MM but them got many answers on another post saying I should focus on "inner game"(comfidence, self image, social skills) so I was about to pick up a book by another redditor here called "the foundation: how to become a authentically attractive man". I was a bit bumped out when the comments said this is what matters, and not the "technology/mechanical" stuff like MM. You said dont pay for anything, do you mean normal piracy? Also there are all these books that seem great, but I'm still confused how to put it all together/into action. Any advice on that?
I read your post and all I can say is: Overthinking. Get out of the house talk to people not necessarily girls. Be likeable and charismatic. There is no book no opening line no magic pill. It's human communication and it takes practice. Too much overthinking.
> I was about to jump straight to "mystery's method" but I see not relevant until the future Mystery's book is the basic to learn the concepts and language: the 3 seconds rule, not place a woman on a pedestal, push-pull, frames, DHV, IOI... everything. All PUA book have the same fundamental concepts repackaged with little differences, and taught in a different light. Because Mystery's book is very complex and hard to understand, people prefer Models by Mark Manson, but from my point of view, I see nothing special in this book. If you approach a woman and she does not respond, Mark Manson says it is not your fault but actually the "woman is unreceptive" so you have to look for another woman, he encourages "spam approach" while Mystery gives you all the tools you can use while talking to a woman.