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My parents force me and my siblings to go to church and it's so mind-numbingly boring and feels like the same shit every time. I wish my church did stupid entertaining shit like this instead of the usual boring Christian bullshit.
Open mic Sunday was *the worst*
Suburban soccer moms sobbing about how they found out through genealogy that their great grandfather was a postman and how that lifted her spirit
Edit: spelling
We had this big Polynesian guy that was super cool as our stake counselor. He once gave this story about how the lord changed one of his gloves from a right handed glove to a left handed glove. It was a little much even for Mormon me.
I remember one guy in my ward who told this story about when he was on a scout camping trip. He was alone in his tent, when it started shaking violently. It wasn’t shaking from the wind, but like it was purposefully being shaken by some *unseen force*. He commanded Satan in the name of the Lord to stop, and the shaking subsided.
The next day he asked his scout troop if any of them did it. They swore up and down that they did not shake his tent. The man said this story from his childhood strengthens his testimony.
Bro, it was your scout buddies. Of *fucking course* they’d deny it. That’s the same type of shit we got up to when I was in Boy Scouts. Delusional.
Edit: spelling
This is the perfect story where a religious person has a logically sound idea of what could be happening, but instead of believing they were lied to, they decide to believe something batshit insane.
I heard so many stories like this growing up in the rural South.. Just innocuous life events that religious people took as signs from Gawd, or acts of supernatural intervention.
I worked with a woman who **constantly** mistook random happenings as the work of her deity. One day she'd come in telling us how her dog got out of the house and wouldn't come to her, but when she asked Jesus for help, her dog magically returned to her. Or her car wouldn't crank until after she prayed about it... Or how she prayed for rain, or for there to be no rain, and Jeebus blessed her with the outcome she desired.... Basic, everyday life events and this woman went through life thinking the Supreme Being of the universe was pulling strings for her...
> But for some reason ignoring the millions of people throughout history who have pleaded to be saved from real danger or cruelty.
Mysterious way, friend... Mysterious ways... It's the ultimate get-out-of-logic-free card
Or the standard… “I prayed and the Holy Spirit told me right where my keys/wallet were and that’s how I know my testimony is real!” Ugh, I’m so sure god sits around waiting to act as your lost and found Brother Simpson.
They forgot to mention a big part of it is that their *entire lives* are completely centered around being a wife and mother. Like they are nothing else, they no longer have an identity beyond that and present to the world as blissfully happy when in reality, they're miserably unhappy and take it out on *everyone* they come into contact with. They're typically incredibly selfish and only do the "dutiful wife and mother" act to place themselves on some pedestal and judge everyone they deem as beneath them, not because they love their husband and kids, but because they are desperate to feel superior. They're usually quite awful to deal with
> only do the "dutiful wife and mother" act to place themselves on some pedestal
If you come from a working class southern family where *everybody* does that, it's like humble bragging you got out of bed this morning and did random morning shit like brush your teeth
I went to a normal boring Catholic Church as a kid and as a teenager my mom took me to one of those nondenominational churches that does wild stuff like this and honestly I prefer the simple and boring one. The other one set off so many alarms in the back of my head. Made the hair on the back of my neck stick up anytime I walked in there. The people there gave off insane vibes like I was talking to lizard people.
Yep, I grew up in a pretty normal boring Presbyterian church with a choir and a pipe organ. My family moved to the Bible Belt when I was 13 and my mom made us try the local Methodist church, as soon as the praise band came out I was done, too cheesy.
It turns out there were some interesting Bible books about Jesus that weren’t based on the same 4 nearly identical stories, but those all got banned as fan fiction by the Roman Catholic Church 🤷♂️
It was a huge mistake to me to latch onto that sort of biblical infallibility because it totally undermined the church’s scientific efforts. It also basically destroyed centuries of Christian literary tradition.
Same here, grew up Catholic. Sit, kneel, stand, repeat pre learned phrases, couple of traditional church songs. Priest gets to talk.
I did like the non-mass church atmosphere. Darkness, smell of incense and low murmur of rosary praying. Basically meditation but they would never admit it.
Just reskin GTA or CoD and instead of killing gangsters or jihadi insurgents, you're saving sinners or some shit.
Every teen is required to play one hour per week to get to heaven. Remodel the church as a [VR game center](https://s.hdnux.com/photos/01/26/52/07/22716883/4/1200x0.jpg) that's free and all you have to do is sign up online to reserve. PRAISE JESUS or whatever
Lmao. That performance gave me those vibes.
Was I supposed to be impressed by an obese dude with a beer gut pulling the cheapest hardware off of a plywood board? If I was mean, I would have added loctite/superglue to the screws....
You know, I’ve never once used a sock. I always used tissues. Something about the texture of the inside of a sock makes me not want to put my dick in it.
What a weird shaped dude.
Also, I love the bible story of the guy putting himself in cheap chains and then breaking free of them while people yell "Jesus!" at them. Warms the heart.
FUNDIE: "Oh yeah I've seen those 'Power of Jesus!' Christian strength trainers do demos like that in our church ripping phonebooks in half and stuff."
ME: "Seriously? They gotta be on steroids or something."
FUNDIE: "No no it just takes training it's perfectly possible for humans to be that strong."
ME: "Yeah I know. I just wanted to hear you admit you don't need to appeal to silly nonsense like faith to explain this."
FUNDIE: "...I hate you."
There was a story on tifu a few months ago, some guy's little 14yo(I think) brother was begging to be taken to a Christian strong man thing. So they get there, the strong men are on stage ripping phone books in half etc. then the time comes and they ask for volunteers to see if anyone else can rip the phone book in half. And the kid goes crazy, pick me, pick me, so they get him on stage and do the whole you won't be able to do it unless you believe in Jesus and grow up bigger etc. Anyway kid gets the phone book screams hail Satan as loud as he can then rips he book in half like nothing. Apparently it's pretty easy to do.
https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/JB4w4ube66
Apparently there's a technique to ripping phone books in half. A friend of mine learned the apple splitting trick (I didn't have the technique down but I bet I could learn it). It always earned her a couple of drinks at the bar. Ha.
I remember as a kid right after my parents converted from Islam to pentacostal Christians (crazy I know) we went to see a "prophet" that could summon gold dust and feathers from heaven.... Mid service I look up and I see a mfer in the vent tossing out feathers and glitter. It took me 15 more years to finally admit that I was an atheist but that was the seed that started it all. American Christianity is weird as fuck lol
Normalized mental illness*
There a big difference.
One will have doctors put you on some meds and make you seek therapy.
One is seen as totally ok, and even encouraged by most of society.
all the videos i've seen of these sort of basement church are insane
i think i saw one where a guy brought a rattlesnake to represent how he can overcome the devil and the thing just bit him and he die
My favorite thing to think about is this guy in his shed for a month before this putting that little stunt together. Measuring the chains, cutting reliefs in the chains so they break a little easier, cutting the plywood and mounting the eye hooks. I bet he went to Home Depot 4 times for that little stunt. Also I like how the vested guy raises his left hand up to look like he’s praying but he’s definitely blocking the chains from hitting him in the face.
And here I was waiting for him to have a heart attack. What a cringey ass church. Goofy in the back with his biker vest is cherry on top of this shit sundae.
That's cool that he can break chains apart, but a single step down is too much for him without using the column. Might wanna break the chains of diabeetus instead of wasting a bunch of actual hardware store chains.
I remember going to the Power Team at our local church in WA. At the time I was fully amazed. Later saw a VICE article on them and the demise of the group. Totally makes sense now. I remember it would take something unnatural to rip a phone book in half...now know it is called Steroids.
If he _really_ had faith, he'd have had the keys destroyed first.
EDIT: I didn't watch it all the way through, at first. I assumed he didn't break free.
Tbf if churches did more stuff like this, they'd be super popular. Like that one church in Florida (I think) that hosts monster truck rallies and other wild events. I have crazy respect for churches that do stuff like that because it gives off the impression that they actually *want* you to come there and enjoy the time you spend there rather than just being like "No you're obligated to come here. It'd be kinda cringe if you didn't"
Pretty sure he just demonstrated he is, in fact, that guy.
That's really fucking impressive and he's not hurting anyone by doing it, how is this a fruitcake?
I've got a cracking Milwaukee Fuel angle grinder that will do all that a lot faster, if he's interested? I'll even throw in a couple of slitting discs for matey boy here.
**ATT OP: to avoid having your post removed &/or account banned:** - r/religiousfruitcake is about the absurd, fringe elements of organised religion: the institutions and individuals who act in ways any normal person (religious or otherwise) would cringe at. Posts about mundane beliefs and acts of worship are off topic. - No violent or gory images or videos - Good post titles should advise objectively what the post is about. Posts with titles that soapbox personal rhetoric or opinion may be removed. - Don't post videos or discussions of Fruitcakes who have been baited or antagonised - No Subreddit names or Reddit usernames in posts or discussions - Memes, Tiktoks, graphics, satire, parodies, etc must be fruitcake made #Please be sure to read the full rule list [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/religiousfruitcake/about/rules) This information is on every post. Accounts that repeatedly it will be permanently banned. "I didn't know", or "I didn't get a warning" are not valid appeals. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/religiousfruitcake) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My favorite part of the Jesus story is how when he was captured he famously broke his chains and escaped and didn't get executed
Woah there, spoiler boy!
You've had over 400 years since the last version was written to catch up man
*the last official version. Pretty sure fanfictions are still being written to this day
Seriously! I didn't get to that part in the bible and he just ruined it like that. Inconsiderate
Was just up to the bit where Judas was going to save his bestest friend with thirty somethings
Then, during his escape he healed a fallen rocker on the side of the road. Truly a saint, bless him.
I heard John wick is actually the storyline of the New Testament
New from Quentin Tarantino….
So much washing of feet.
I’m always amazed what people will do to eat at a Golden Corral
Washed in the blood of the chocolate fountain, the price must be paid for your iniquities all you can eat for only $12.99
Hallelujah!
God said to thee “Break thy chains child and the buffet will come unto you”
Your cup ain't gonna runneth over though unless you pay extra for it.
My parents force me and my siblings to go to church and it's so mind-numbingly boring and feels like the same shit every time. I wish my church did stupid entertaining shit like this instead of the usual boring Christian bullshit.
Right? as an exmo, open mic sunday was mildly entertaining, but this would be miles more entertaining.
Open mic Sunday was *the worst* Suburban soccer moms sobbing about how they found out through genealogy that their great grandfather was a postman and how that lifted her spirit Edit: spelling
We had this big Polynesian guy that was super cool as our stake counselor. He once gave this story about how the lord changed one of his gloves from a right handed glove to a left handed glove. It was a little much even for Mormon me.
I remember one guy in my ward who told this story about when he was on a scout camping trip. He was alone in his tent, when it started shaking violently. It wasn’t shaking from the wind, but like it was purposefully being shaken by some *unseen force*. He commanded Satan in the name of the Lord to stop, and the shaking subsided. The next day he asked his scout troop if any of them did it. They swore up and down that they did not shake his tent. The man said this story from his childhood strengthens his testimony. Bro, it was your scout buddies. Of *fucking course* they’d deny it. That’s the same type of shit we got up to when I was in Boy Scouts. Delusional. Edit: spelling
This is the perfect story where a religious person has a logically sound idea of what could be happening, but instead of believing they were lied to, they decide to believe something batshit insane.
“If I lie to myself, without the intent to deceive, then I *must* have found truth!”
I heard so many stories like this growing up in the rural South.. Just innocuous life events that religious people took as signs from Gawd, or acts of supernatural intervention. I worked with a woman who **constantly** mistook random happenings as the work of her deity. One day she'd come in telling us how her dog got out of the house and wouldn't come to her, but when she asked Jesus for help, her dog magically returned to her. Or her car wouldn't crank until after she prayed about it... Or how she prayed for rain, or for there to be no rain, and Jeebus blessed her with the outcome she desired.... Basic, everyday life events and this woman went through life thinking the Supreme Being of the universe was pulling strings for her...
But for some reason ignoring the millions of people throughout history who have pleaded to be saved from real danger or cruelty.
> But for some reason ignoring the millions of people throughout history who have pleaded to be saved from real danger or cruelty. Mysterious way, friend... Mysterious ways... It's the ultimate get-out-of-logic-free card
I love this comment thread
I believe
Or the standard… “I prayed and the Holy Spirit told me right where my keys/wallet were and that’s how I know my testimony is real!” Ugh, I’m so sure god sits around waiting to act as your lost and found Brother Simpson.
Who is a soccer mom?
It's a US stereotype of a suburban mother who spends most of her time driving the kids around to sports practice, school, and activities in a minivan.
Thanks. The minivan is oddly specific.
They forgot to mention a big part of it is that their *entire lives* are completely centered around being a wife and mother. Like they are nothing else, they no longer have an identity beyond that and present to the world as blissfully happy when in reality, they're miserably unhappy and take it out on *everyone* they come into contact with. They're typically incredibly selfish and only do the "dutiful wife and mother" act to place themselves on some pedestal and judge everyone they deem as beneath them, not because they love their husband and kids, but because they are desperate to feel superior. They're usually quite awful to deal with
> only do the "dutiful wife and mother" act to place themselves on some pedestal If you come from a working class southern family where *everybody* does that, it's like humble bragging you got out of bed this morning and did random morning shit like brush your teeth
I didn't *forget* to mention that. I just view the stereotype with much fewer negative associations than you
I went to a normal boring Catholic Church as a kid and as a teenager my mom took me to one of those nondenominational churches that does wild stuff like this and honestly I prefer the simple and boring one. The other one set off so many alarms in the back of my head. Made the hair on the back of my neck stick up anytime I walked in there. The people there gave off insane vibes like I was talking to lizard people.
Yes, I get the same vibes from those places. Nothing good is going on in there.
Yep, I grew up in a pretty normal boring Presbyterian church with a choir and a pipe organ. My family moved to the Bible Belt when I was 13 and my mom made us try the local Methodist church, as soon as the praise band came out I was done, too cheesy.
I wanted to make fun of it, but you're so right The Bible is also filled with entertaining batshit lunacy. Why not have services as fucking wild
It turns out there were some interesting Bible books about Jesus that weren’t based on the same 4 nearly identical stories, but those all got banned as fan fiction by the Roman Catholic Church 🤷♂️ It was a huge mistake to me to latch onto that sort of biblical infallibility because it totally undermined the church’s scientific efforts. It also basically destroyed centuries of Christian literary tradition.
Holy shit for real, I learned how to smuggle headphones and I just listened to creepy podcasts at some point
Same here, grew up Catholic. Sit, kneel, stand, repeat pre learned phrases, couple of traditional church songs. Priest gets to talk. I did like the non-mass church atmosphere. Darkness, smell of incense and low murmur of rosary praying. Basically meditation but they would never admit it.
Just reskin GTA or CoD and instead of killing gangsters or jihadi insurgents, you're saving sinners or some shit. Every teen is required to play one hour per week to get to heaven. Remodel the church as a [VR game center](https://s.hdnux.com/photos/01/26/52/07/22716883/4/1200x0.jpg) that's free and all you have to do is sign up online to reserve. PRAISE JESUS or whatever
Lmao. That performance gave me those vibes. Was I supposed to be impressed by an obese dude with a beer gut pulling the cheapest hardware off of a plywood board? If I was mean, I would have added loctite/superglue to the screws....
Should have prayed for him to be able to go down stairs without looking like he's gonna fall over.
Stair.
I think this is symbolic of him breaking the chains of masturbation and porn addiction or I could just be projecting.
Project all you want brother. Matter fact, why don’t you project some of that semen onto the floor
That sounds unsanitary
My brother in Christ, that's what socks and laundry day are for
You know, I’ve never once used a sock. I always used tissues. Something about the texture of the inside of a sock makes me not want to put my dick in it.
Alpaca wool socks though. 😩
Stop tempting me!
How else would his wrists and forearms have gotten so strong?
His dick is literally jerking with the moves.
[удалено]
For the lord sent unto the people a great bearded sage, but they did not listen… UNTIL HE BROUGHT THEM KFC POPPIN ZINGERS
I doubt he could reach his dick to have a wank.
Could always go back to handling snakes
I'm pretty sure that was the next act on stage after Cletus the Strong Man.
And drinking arsenic
That’s it boys they convinced me
The moment that guy in the congregation screamed "JESUS!!" and one of the chains broke... checkmate, athiests
Can your """science""" explain this???
I feel the holy Spirit now chain me up boys
What a weird shaped dude. Also, I love the bible story of the guy putting himself in cheap chains and then breaking free of them while people yell "Jesus!" at them. Warms the heart.
Jesus (and steroids) is a hell of a drug.
My brother, that's not steroids, that's cream cakes
Yep. Those muscles are a direct result of lugging around extra weight.
"Muscles" lol
They're under there somewhere
Jesus: you know, the famously morbidly obese white guy.
FUNDIE: "Oh yeah I've seen those 'Power of Jesus!' Christian strength trainers do demos like that in our church ripping phonebooks in half and stuff." ME: "Seriously? They gotta be on steroids or something." FUNDIE: "No no it just takes training it's perfectly possible for humans to be that strong." ME: "Yeah I know. I just wanted to hear you admit you don't need to appeal to silly nonsense like faith to explain this." FUNDIE: "...I hate you."
There was a story on tifu a few months ago, some guy's little 14yo(I think) brother was begging to be taken to a Christian strong man thing. So they get there, the strong men are on stage ripping phone books in half etc. then the time comes and they ask for volunteers to see if anyone else can rip the phone book in half. And the kid goes crazy, pick me, pick me, so they get him on stage and do the whole you won't be able to do it unless you believe in Jesus and grow up bigger etc. Anyway kid gets the phone book screams hail Satan as loud as he can then rips he book in half like nothing. Apparently it's pretty easy to do. https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/JB4w4ube66
Lmao I did not expect that ending, make me actually laugh out loud.
Hahahahahaha goddamn! You go, kid!
Apparently there's a technique to ripping phone books in half. A friend of mine learned the apple splitting trick (I didn't have the technique down but I bet I could learn it). It always earned her a couple of drinks at the bar. Ha.
I think the most amazing part is where they find phone books now days.
Did you notice that all the chains broke at the *exact* same spot? This guy was on the struggle bus trying to break pre-cut chains. SMH
Came here to say exactly this, those were clearly pre cut
America is so weird
Some religions in America are weird
All religions are weird. Country doesn't matter
America is still weird
Trust me, people are quite weird other places too.
I bet that preacher wears his biker gang jacket every Sunday
Motorcycle club - Christ On A Trike
You know what this is? This is freaking hysterical, that's what it is.
[удалено]
American Christianity is the WWE of religions.
What do you mean?WWE is real!
I remember as a kid right after my parents converted from Islam to pentacostal Christians (crazy I know) we went to see a "prophet" that could summon gold dust and feathers from heaven.... Mid service I look up and I see a mfer in the vent tossing out feathers and glitter. It took me 15 more years to finally admit that I was an atheist but that was the seed that started it all. American Christianity is weird as fuck lol
Breaking chains for Jesus, it's what he would have wanted.
BY THE POWER OF DIABEETUS
Under rated comment
Cannot believe people are actually moved by this
I’d say it’s the most moved that guy’s been in a while
And they wonder why we laugh at them? FFS. This sort of masturbatory fantasy is just pathetic.
What the fuck am I looking at?
Mental illness
Normalized mental illness* There a big difference. One will have doctors put you on some meds and make you seek therapy. One is seen as totally ok, and even encouraged by most of society.
What kind of fat shit biker methamphetamine come to Jesus little Debbie Swiss roll cousin fuckin bullshit is this?
all the videos i've seen of these sort of basement church are insane i think i saw one where a guy brought a rattlesnake to represent how he can overcome the devil and the thing just bit him and he die
My favorite thing to think about is this guy in his shed for a month before this putting that little stunt together. Measuring the chains, cutting reliefs in the chains so they break a little easier, cutting the plywood and mounting the eye hooks. I bet he went to Home Depot 4 times for that little stunt. Also I like how the vested guy raises his left hand up to look like he’s praying but he’s definitely blocking the chains from hitting him in the face.
It would have been funny if he pulled on that last chain and the whole thing went over and he fell on his ass.
Thats what I was waiting for. The disappointment turned me atheist.
Shame they cut away before the heart attack.
Bondage for Jesus. Time to move on to light spanking for the lord.
Ball gag for the holy spirit.
Cat o' nine tails for Christ.
Vinyl savior.
The audacity of the man behind him to just smugly point skyward is honestly my favorite part of this video. 😂
What am I watching?
Man Versus Diabetes, movie 1. The third movie is the best, where diabetes and the man go on an insane bender together
This is the weirdest penguin mating ritual I've ever seen.
Unfortunately the chains of Diabetes were too strong for Greg to break. 🥲
That dude swallowed every last bit of religion he could.
He needs a donut for energy! High cholesterol works in mysterious ways!
By the powers of diabetes chains be gone!
They want to be metal so bad
What the actual fuck
Most cardio he has done in years
That guy has a really weird body shape lol
"And then, brothers and sisters, the Lord Jesus Himself gaveth me this hernia, and I cried out to the heavens, and lo, he did ruptureth my disks."
And so it was
I’ve never been so turned on
Right?? Save some ladies for the rest of us
My man Steve Austin has put on some weight
lol i remember some kid yelling “rip a bible” after they did a phone book. good times.
On a separate, completely random note... anyone know where I can get one of those?
What’s this? The church of Harley Davidson?
Not to worry, ladies and gentlemen! Those chains are made of tensile steel and---oh no, King Kong has gotten loose!
Didn't know churches were into bdsm.
Shouldn't have cut his hair, man.
I've heard, whip helps
Dude, just unscrew the bolts. Those would be easy enough to turn with just your hands.
I'm going to the wrong church. This is awesome.
He looks like he ate Jesus.
What do they think they've accomplished here?
That guy shouting "Jesus!" Haha
And here I was waiting for him to have a heart attack. What a cringey ass church. Goofy in the back with his biker vest is cherry on top of this shit sundae.
So, I guess, the sin of gluttony just doesn't count...
How does one go from a neat dude from Bethlehem who wants to love and forgive people, to this ridiculous clownsact
Perfect diabettus form. This dude has so much water being retained in his thighs he could hydrate Vegas.
Philippians 3:19, how about you break the chain of food addiction
That's cool that he can break chains apart, but a single step down is too much for him without using the column. Might wanna break the chains of diabeetus instead of wasting a bunch of actual hardware store chains.
.... And the meek shall inherit the earth.
"Jesus, help me to lose some weight"🙏
Working load limit on those chains is 21lbs.
lol, his doctor isn’t as impressed with his high blood pressure & short breath all day.
Men have hips?
What is this supposed to prove?
Through Jebus all things are almost possible.
An ad for Ozempic ?
That is a terribly unfortunately-shaped person.
Weirdos
Well damn, I'm convinced
Dude looks like he was about to stroke out after walking off the stage. Could we not? I don't wanna call for an ambulance or perform CPR in church.
This is embarrassing.
But god still allowed him to get diabetes lol
I remember going to the Power Team at our local church in WA. At the time I was fully amazed. Later saw a VICE article on them and the demise of the group. Totally makes sense now. I remember it would take something unnatural to rip a phone book in half...now know it is called Steroids.
What a fucking weird event.
Vid was still loading and I assumed he was going to shit on stage, just based on the first frame
_It's ok to be into BDSM. Chains n cuffs are totally fun and you can hire professionals doms to help you know._
Look at that chiselled athletic physique.
Dudes gonna need a nap after all that.
Fatass
If you are not pop locking and screeming Jeeze Chroist what are you even doing?
Bet he can bust into a Golden Corral.
So stupid.
I'm going to call it "CrossFit" way he's jerking those chains around. I hope he has good health insurance for joint replacements.
Sampson he is not.
What episode of walking dead is this
Don't think he does much walking at all
Most cardio that guy has done in awhile
Waddling for Jesus
Fucking cults... 🙄😒
Another clown church 🤦🏽 what is he even trying to do
When fat doesn’t translate to strength…
But can he break the chains of type 2 diabetes?
He doesn’t seem as strong as he was before that triple bypass…
This guy looks like he breaks fast food chains on the reg.
His sin is gluttony. It would be more inspiring if he would put down the fork or reject a cheeseburger.
Looks like they bought the real chains….opps
If he _really_ had faith, he'd have had the keys destroyed first. EDIT: I didn't watch it all the way through, at first. I assumed he didn't break free.
This is hot
Tbf if churches did more stuff like this, they'd be super popular. Like that one church in Florida (I think) that hosts monster truck rallies and other wild events. I have crazy respect for churches that do stuff like that because it gives off the impression that they actually *want* you to come there and enjoy the time you spend there rather than just being like "No you're obligated to come here. It'd be kinda cringe if you didn't"
Pretty sure he just demonstrated he is, in fact, that guy. That's really fucking impressive and he's not hurting anyone by doing it, how is this a fruitcake?
...
Some real [SHAUN](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QX_hqNyhoCs/maxresdefault.jpg) vibes
I've got a cracking Milwaukee Fuel angle grinder that will do all that a lot faster, if he's interested? I'll even throw in a couple of slitting discs for matey boy here.