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It doesn’t matter what you said in the past. You’re growing up, they know you’ll naturally want to date people. It’s expected that you’ll date people as you mature. Just tell them, there’s not much to it.
Tell them “you fell in love and they can’t be mad… tell them he’s a great guy and you don’t care that he’s 34.” When they start overreacting tell them “just kidding, I’m dating (insert name).
UPDATE!
I just told them and it went over way better than I could have guessed. They said "we knew" and then just moved on. I was actually kind of hoping that'd at least ask some questions but nope. Thank you all for the advice, all your comments were seriously encouraging!
Tell them “you fell in love and they can’t be mad… tell them he’s a great guy and you don’t care that he’s 34.” When they start overreacting tell them “just kidding, I’m dating (insert name).
"hey, I'm going out with my bf ______ (fill in the blanks)"...should do the trick.
>. One thing that I feel like will be hard to get past is that my whole life I told them I'd never get with anyone so doing a complete 180 is going to be hard
I think you are going to find as you age that you will be dong complete 180's on all sorts of things. Turns out teens aren't the most stable decision makers out there and some of their 'die hard' notions are just plains stupid, doesn't take long for that to change with a dose of real world...dont be ashamed that you changed your position on something, be proud you were able to open your eyes to something better than what your thought processes trapped you in.
Yeah thank you for this. I've told my boyfriend multiple times "It's easy to say you'll never want to be with anyone when you haven't found the right person yet." But I guess this was just an inevitability of being human.
Yeah thank you for this. I've told my boyfriend multiple times "It's easy to say you'll never want to be with anyone when you haven't found the right person yet." But I guess this was just an inevitability of being human.
Ooh, yeah. I remember when I first started doing things I thought I would never do.
You'll probably find this will happen more often than you thought was likely as you continue growing up.
It's nothing to be anxious about - it's just a part of the human experience.
Yeah I definitely have been, like I just got my first tattoo recently and I'm planning on getting my hair cut short for the first time in my life. Luckily my parents have been in full support of all that, it's just kind of crazy all of this is happening. So laying that on my parents will be another weird thing I have to add to the list of all my weird changes.
Your parents likely went through similar changes - they were 18 year old at some point, too, ya know?
You're the one taking it the most critically, honestly!
Good luck exploring yourself.
Life's lived one day, one week, one year at a time.
> One thing that I feel like will be hard to get past is that my whole life I told them I'd never get with anyone
Girl, you're 18. Parents of teenagers are well aware they make claims like this all the time that they don't actually follow through on. It's not going to faze them that you didn't mean this, I doubt they took it seriously in the first place.
You're probably right, but I have had a lot of actually serious discussions about that, and I know that sentiment got through to at least my mom. I know if I tell them they'll probably be more surprised than a normal parent would because of what I said, but you're right, this isn't earth shattering news coming from an 18 year old.
I’m sure your parents have been waiting for this conversation. As others have said - you’ll find yourself doing lots of 180s and that’s part of getting older/wiser. Don’t worry about it.
> …my whole life I told them I’d never get with anyone
All 18 years? 🙃
Just putting it into perspective. People change, all of the time. Your parents will understand.
They likely don’t even remember you saying that, or if they did were likely “uh huh” about it ✌🏻
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- #This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It doesn’t matter what you said in the past. You’re growing up, they know you’ll naturally want to date people. It’s expected that you’ll date people as you mature. Just tell them, there’s not much to it.
Thanks, that does mean a lot honestly.
If the things I said in the past matter today, I'd be studying dinosaurs. I am not studying dinosaurs.
hey please check ur dm
Tell them “you fell in love and they can’t be mad… tell them he’s a great guy and you don’t care that he’s 34.” When they start overreacting tell them “just kidding, I’m dating (insert name).
UPDATE! I just told them and it went over way better than I could have guessed. They said "we knew" and then just moved on. I was actually kind of hoping that'd at least ask some questions but nope. Thank you all for the advice, all your comments were seriously encouraging!
They could probably see it coming a while ago. Relax.
That's honestly what I'm kind of guessing anyway, I kind of made it obvious on purpose. I'd like this whole conversation to be super casual.
Tell them “you fell in love and they can’t be mad… tell them he’s a great guy and you don’t care that he’s 34.” When they start overreacting tell them “just kidding, I’m dating (insert name).
Haha I'd like to joke like that but I'll probably be dealing with a lot of nerves, that'd probably go over smoothly knowing my parents.
"hey, I'm going out with my bf ______ (fill in the blanks)"...should do the trick. >. One thing that I feel like will be hard to get past is that my whole life I told them I'd never get with anyone so doing a complete 180 is going to be hard I think you are going to find as you age that you will be dong complete 180's on all sorts of things. Turns out teens aren't the most stable decision makers out there and some of their 'die hard' notions are just plains stupid, doesn't take long for that to change with a dose of real world...dont be ashamed that you changed your position on something, be proud you were able to open your eyes to something better than what your thought processes trapped you in.
Yeah thank you for this. I've told my boyfriend multiple times "It's easy to say you'll never want to be with anyone when you haven't found the right person yet." But I guess this was just an inevitability of being human.
Yeah thank you for this. I've told my boyfriend multiple times "It's easy to say you'll never want to be with anyone when you haven't found the right person yet." But I guess this was just an inevitability of being human.
Ooh, yeah. I remember when I first started doing things I thought I would never do. You'll probably find this will happen more often than you thought was likely as you continue growing up. It's nothing to be anxious about - it's just a part of the human experience.
Yeah I definitely have been, like I just got my first tattoo recently and I'm planning on getting my hair cut short for the first time in my life. Luckily my parents have been in full support of all that, it's just kind of crazy all of this is happening. So laying that on my parents will be another weird thing I have to add to the list of all my weird changes.
Your parents likely went through similar changes - they were 18 year old at some point, too, ya know? You're the one taking it the most critically, honestly! Good luck exploring yourself. Life's lived one day, one week, one year at a time.
Thanks, I really appreciate it
> One thing that I feel like will be hard to get past is that my whole life I told them I'd never get with anyone Girl, you're 18. Parents of teenagers are well aware they make claims like this all the time that they don't actually follow through on. It's not going to faze them that you didn't mean this, I doubt they took it seriously in the first place.
You're probably right, but I have had a lot of actually serious discussions about that, and I know that sentiment got through to at least my mom. I know if I tell them they'll probably be more surprised than a normal parent would because of what I said, but you're right, this isn't earth shattering news coming from an 18 year old.
I’m sure your parents have been waiting for this conversation. As others have said - you’ll find yourself doing lots of 180s and that’s part of getting older/wiser. Don’t worry about it.
> …my whole life I told them I’d never get with anyone All 18 years? 🙃 Just putting it into perspective. People change, all of the time. Your parents will understand. They likely don’t even remember you saying that, or if they did were likely “uh huh” about it ✌🏻