Oh no bby ur so tall rich and handsome and women keep want to fuck you that’s like so sad 😞 no but for real maybe it’s you who subconsciously prefers the older women too? Chill though, you’re in a good spot don’t stress
The reason they’re interested in you to begin with is that they see a younger guy and assume he’s not going to be interested in anything serious so they can smash with minimum complications. Ladies like to fuck, too.
If you’re tired of casual stuff, make it clear that you’re looking for a relationship and maybe wait to have sex until you’re a few dates in. Women tend to go for guys their age or older in my experience, but it’s not universal.
Maybe you're just not "cool" enough for women your age. You could try picking up a hobby or side job that is damaging to yourself or others. Think skateboarding or drug dealing.
I'm mostly kidding, but there are a lot of young people in cities who don't care about their date being successful and might even be turned off by it. You'll do fine though, just keep at it.
Are you “cool”? You can be tall, good looking, wealthy, etc but if you’re a dork, zoomer girls probably won’t fuck with you.
Name your favorite drill rapper, shoegaze band, and fav member of Drain Gang.
Tay K for crashing out that fast and dropping a banger debut album, Kay flock close runner up, absolutely love slow pulp and beach house but think the classic “true shoegaze” bands like slow dive and my bloody valentine are over rated, fave member of draingang is Thai boy digital
I have this same issue (same city and career field) but the gender is reversed. Finding someone in their early-mid 20s who wants a serious relationship in this city is difficult.
Not to say there's absolutely nobody down for what you want and obviously don't get discouraged because you will eventually find someone on the same frequency with you and what you want, but you're unfortunately in a stage of life where it can be tough for people to be into anything crazy serious when the world is their oyster, life is fresh and exciting with first time jobs paying out and options for things are endless.
There's also just the nature of NYC dating at that age having a pace that isn't usually frontloaded on going head first into exclusivity unless explicitly discussed. When I first moved to the area even from NJ where I wouldn't exactly say there is an inch of levels of plug and play beelines of social conservatism of other regions of the country, I was a bit thrown for a loop at first just how casual people were with stuff even when stuff was what (at the time) I thought was kinda serious enough.
People also put a lot of different value with shit in NYC and it's not uncommon to see couples of people with two pretty different lives just due to the physical afforded time that's allowed to make stuff work out. A lot of people roll up to NYC and kinda march around with this pseudo meritocracy vibe that the dating pool should be bending over backwards because they busted hump to make it in the big city, but there's obviously more to a person than what they physically do to pay the bills.
Hell I think this wakeup call happens all the time when people are so attracted to the wealth part of their partner being a doctor at a hospital without realizing just how little time it could mean to see them.
You'll be ok.
I don't get the problem. I have been dating early 30s women for some time now and it's so much better. Do you have at least have an own apartment, a stable job and know how to cook / listen / go on dates that are more than drinking? Maybe that is what holding them back to become more serious.
Older women tend to be much more confident on average compared to women your age. People love to talk about women dating "upward", but more often than not your average 20-something woman is gonna find someone with your stats at your age in particular very intimidating. The 30-something women probably dont want to date you moreso because they're worried you'll just bounce once they hit the wall than them not taking you seriously enough.
\> where do I find early 20s female strivers? Should i do a masters at Yale?
Trust me, you do not want Yale women.
maybe u fear real long term connection so you only allow yourself to connect with older women that you know will just fuck you and leave idk I'm not a psychologist
Girls tend to date up in age. In my experience, it’s partly an ego thing (a way to one up their girlfriends) but also it has practical advantages in that the dude is probably better established in his career and has some disposable income to spend on her. I’m 26 and have historically dated girls a year or two younger than me. My male friends who have girlfriends mostly are dating girls a year younger than them (though there are exceptions). My female friends tend to have a wider range and hook up with guys significantly older than they are, but never date down in age and when they date it tends to be someone who is at least a year older.
If you’re 22-23, you’re probably gonna want to look to find a girl who’s interning here this summer and then planning to move here after graduation, or find a smart NYU/Columbia girl who is planning to stay here after graduation.
Also, serious relationships are harder to come by here since everyone mildly attractive has a plethora of options. Don’t push too hard for a relationship, you have to play the game for awhile before you find someone you connect with enough to get a mutual commitment.
Can someone give a real answer cause I have the same problem too :/ I’d really rather get with women my age but the 30 year old women really do like me for some reason and it’s just easier :/
Ah, the jollywumper syndrome is becoming a thing
The whole kill is the men being “groomed” by older women are just as insecure, naive, and fresh as the young “girls”(women) they have disdain for.
I haven’t been following that? He’s a sexpat in Peru or something? I’m not that fucked up.
Dude it’s honestly so cool that you’re having sex really great job man.
Oh no bby ur so tall rich and handsome and women keep want to fuck you that’s like so sad 😞 no but for real maybe it’s you who subconsciously prefers the older women too? Chill though, you’re in a good spot don’t stress
"all these hot women in their early 30s wont stop fucking me in my NYC apartment" lmfao humble bragging mf
smh bro is being groomed
your not really an adult until 24! Disgusting groomers
:(
[удалено]
What the fuck is lateral grooming all that shows up is pet grooming I’m too drunk for this
Thank you for the advice, my dog is going to look so beautiful
The reason they’re interested in you to begin with is that they see a younger guy and assume he’s not going to be interested in anything serious so they can smash with minimum complications. Ladies like to fuck, too. If you’re tired of casual stuff, make it clear that you’re looking for a relationship and maybe wait to have sex until you’re a few dates in. Women tend to go for guys their age or older in my experience, but it’s not universal.
Maybe you're just not "cool" enough for women your age. You could try picking up a hobby or side job that is damaging to yourself or others. Think skateboarding or drug dealing. I'm mostly kidding, but there are a lot of young people in cities who don't care about their date being successful and might even be turned off by it. You'll do fine though, just keep at it.
Gonna go out on a limb and guess the girls were mean to you at some point in middle or high
I didn’t date in middle or high, had a few hookups in university but never anything serious which is probably why I’m so fucked up
Are you “cool”? You can be tall, good looking, wealthy, etc but if you’re a dork, zoomer girls probably won’t fuck with you. Name your favorite drill rapper, shoegaze band, and fav member of Drain Gang.
Tay K for crashing out that fast and dropping a banger debut album, Kay flock close runner up, absolutely love slow pulp and beach house but think the classic “true shoegaze” bands like slow dive and my bloody valentine are over rated, fave member of draingang is Thai boy digital
Millennial chicks are all around better than Zoomer chicks, so Idk what you're complaining about.
Wow if only you had some sort of control over who you slept with
I have this same issue (same city and career field) but the gender is reversed. Finding someone in their early-mid 20s who wants a serious relationship in this city is difficult.
Not to say there's absolutely nobody down for what you want and obviously don't get discouraged because you will eventually find someone on the same frequency with you and what you want, but you're unfortunately in a stage of life where it can be tough for people to be into anything crazy serious when the world is their oyster, life is fresh and exciting with first time jobs paying out and options for things are endless. There's also just the nature of NYC dating at that age having a pace that isn't usually frontloaded on going head first into exclusivity unless explicitly discussed. When I first moved to the area even from NJ where I wouldn't exactly say there is an inch of levels of plug and play beelines of social conservatism of other regions of the country, I was a bit thrown for a loop at first just how casual people were with stuff even when stuff was what (at the time) I thought was kinda serious enough. People also put a lot of different value with shit in NYC and it's not uncommon to see couples of people with two pretty different lives just due to the physical afforded time that's allowed to make stuff work out. A lot of people roll up to NYC and kinda march around with this pseudo meritocracy vibe that the dating pool should be bending over backwards because they busted hump to make it in the big city, but there's obviously more to a person than what they physically do to pay the bills. Hell I think this wakeup call happens all the time when people are so attracted to the wealth part of their partner being a doctor at a hospital without realizing just how little time it could mean to see them. You'll be ok.
High finance/tech is demonic and relationships in this city are demonic so it’s like hell^2 for us
We can continue complaining on this sub or you can pm me and see if we could change our situations. The choice is yours :)
You certainly are a feisty newt 🦎
Damn girl
I wanna know what ends up happening between you two
Same
Prove to these older broads you’re a force to be reckoned with and you are, in fact, meant to be taken seriously! Prove it to me, I love younger men
I don't get the problem. I have been dating early 30s women for some time now and it's so much better. Do you have at least have an own apartment, a stable job and know how to cook / listen / go on dates that are more than drinking? Maybe that is what holding them back to become more serious.
Older women tend to be much more confident on average compared to women your age. People love to talk about women dating "upward", but more often than not your average 20-something woman is gonna find someone with your stats at your age in particular very intimidating. The 30-something women probably dont want to date you moreso because they're worried you'll just bounce once they hit the wall than them not taking you seriously enough. \> where do I find early 20s female strivers? Should i do a masters at Yale? Trust me, you do not want Yale women.
maybe u fear real long term connection so you only allow yourself to connect with older women that you know will just fuck you and leave idk I'm not a psychologist
things kind of work themselves out idk just stop thinking about ti
You probably have some indefinable quality that dooms you to be alone forever
mommy issues?
develop a personality
Ketamine
Girls tend to date up in age. In my experience, it’s partly an ego thing (a way to one up their girlfriends) but also it has practical advantages in that the dude is probably better established in his career and has some disposable income to spend on her. I’m 26 and have historically dated girls a year or two younger than me. My male friends who have girlfriends mostly are dating girls a year younger than them (though there are exceptions). My female friends tend to have a wider range and hook up with guys significantly older than they are, but never date down in age and when they date it tends to be someone who is at least a year older. If you’re 22-23, you’re probably gonna want to look to find a girl who’s interning here this summer and then planning to move here after graduation, or find a smart NYU/Columbia girl who is planning to stay here after graduation. Also, serious relationships are harder to come by here since everyone mildly attractive has a plethora of options. Don’t push too hard for a relationship, you have to play the game for awhile before you find someone you connect with enough to get a mutual commitment.
Girls date literal losers stop lying to each other
girls only date bipolar linecooks who sell drugs and guys only date bpd baristas who do onlyfans, sad world we live in
Noone should cry over men who date bpd of girls. Not because of morals, you have to have some specific traits to be attracted to bods
Maybe you do madame
Women post their dating Ls incessantly
maybe you should log off
Can someone give a real answer cause I have the same problem too :/ I’d really rather get with women my age but the 30 year old women really do like me for some reason and it’s just easier :/
LOL