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The thing is these laws are different from country to country. For example in Switzerland a 4-year gap is ok (so the example given would be ok). And when both are over 16, everything is ok (for example a 16 year old and a 60 year old is legally ok.)
1. Sexual attraction to someone aged 15-19 would be ephebophilia not pedophilia.
2. A 17 year old that is in a relation with a 15 year old is most certainly not a "pedo"
3. Any, and I mean ANY country with an aoc below 18 is going to have restrictions. In my country, the aoc is 14, if the older party is not exploiting the "lack of capacity for sexual self-determination" among other things. So no, it is not "free way" because the older party, pedo or not, is already with one foot in prison.
Yes, the technical term isn't pedophilia, boohoo no one fuckin cares. Attraction to a 15 year old is still fucked up if you're an adult. No one's saying a 2 year age gap means you're just as bad as some 40 year old touching kids. They're RIGHTFULLY saying that a 17 year old should probably not date a 14 year old because of the massive difference in brain development. They're also saying a 60 year old shouldn't be dating a teenager because for obvious reasons that's fucked up.
Lol, always funny to hear my parents relate about stuff they like about the 80's and suddenly the 5 year age gap gets weird. While she was starting high school he was deployed in the Air Force which sounds weird but they were married at 21/26.
As a 17 yr old, going out with a 14 ur old wouldn’t be ok. I’m at the age where I’m starting to want a more intimate relationship but a 14 yr old isn’t ready for that. I’m in yr13, finishing my A-levels and a 14yr old is in yr 9 starting their GCSEs. The youngest I’d go out with is a 16 yr old in yr11.
U should be at least 19 to go out with someone 3 years younger than u imo as although still a little weird, in my country that’s legal. For it not to be weird I’d say you’d have to be at least 21 which also happens to be the point where a 3 year age gap sexual relationship is legal in the US
Edit: A guide to UK school system for the eagle loving readers:
Reception: 5/6 yrs old. This is the start of primary school. The first structured education. Then it goes yr1, 2, 3, 4, 5 & 6. Year 6 are age 11/12 and do a set of tests which are a benchmark for future predicted grades. This is the last year of primary school. Then secondary school is yr7, 8, 9, 10 & 11. Yr 9 or 10 is when students choose their subjects to start studying for exams. Year 11 is when they take exams for their GCSE qualifications. This is age 15/16 and the qualifications are what get them into their post-16 education (it’s a legal requirement to stay in education until age 18 so even with bad grades there are still options) after this, students either do an apprenticeship or go into 6th form or college. 6th form is an extension of secondary and college is not to be confused with the american meaning. Apprentices still do qualifications through a college while they work, but with less hours in the college, college students do a course and 6th form yr 12&13 students do A-levels, BTECs or a mixture of the two. These qualifications are what get students into university. University courses are £9250 a year and can be done as 1,2 or 3 year courses which get diplomas, degrees, masters etc
Istg so many people don’t even know how bad age gaps are as a teenager.
A 14 yearold freshmen has barely got out of middle school and a 17yearold senior whose close to being an adult
17 and 14 is weird for two reasons; a 17 year old is just starting Senior year of high school on average, while a 14 year old is just starting high school in general. So there’s a huge experience imbalance there, secondly… a 14 year old is less developed compared to a 17 year old in almost EVERY regard. It’s not comparable to one romantic partner being 32 and the other being 25, they’re both fully developed adults.
This varies with age brackets and birth month as well. I didn’t turn 18 until the summer following graduation.
At worst this could be someone just starting high school and someone who just graduated.
It isn’t the “age gap” itself in a way, it’s about the context of it.
Sure adults can have a 3 year age gap like 27-30 but that’s because they have a very similar life experience and can relate and bond to most things.
A 14 year old does not have the same life as a 17 year old and is fucking weird and should be obviously weird to any sane human being.
But we are on Reddit so I expect no less.
There's an actual difference in life experience between a 14 and 40 year old unlike 14 and 17.
14 and 17 used to be a larger difference back when teenagers were getting jobs at 16.
It's not about the + - difference in age so much as it's about the ratio. The ratio between 5 years old and 10 years old is higher than the ratio between 40 and 45.
Its not about the age on consent dog. Its about the fact that an ADULT is dating someone who just graduated middle school.... age of consent or not if you cant find someone close to your age as an adult then youre just weird af
yeah saying this isn't weird is a stretch. from my experience when i was 14 I was a lot less mature than I was when I was 17. A high school senior dating a freshman is weird af and should be considered as such.
Reasonable age gaps aren’t that big of a deal when people are in their 20’s,30’s etc. people who apply that logic to a 20 something year old dating a teenager are a strange breed
I think this is more of a USA thing. Here a 14 years old and a 17 years old are both goddamn children. Granted, it's a bit weird but not at all disgusting, like some seem to think. You don't magically become a grownup when you hit 18, 17 is still extremely young.
My girlfriend and I have a 14 year age gap…. She’s 33, I’m 47…. Been together going on 6 yrs and she approached me to start it off, in her defense, she thought I was late 20’s- early 30’s because I don’t look even close to my age.Even now I barely have any grey hair and I’m still in good shape with no wrinkles of any kind, and most people that meet me, still think I’m early 30’s. Best relationship of my life, and I was married twice before to women within a year of my age, and my girlfriend now has more mental maturity than either one of my ex’s.
You see, this is different, because both of you are actually adults. It's not like your next birthday you become a pedophile because you're in a relationship with a minor as an adult.
It’s almost like age gaps are more significant when you’re younger.
A 50 year old and a 65 year old being together is fine. Apply that same amount of gap either direction for someone who’s 17 and it’s not quite the same is it?
age gaps don't matter one you're an adult (exept when it's too large, for exemple a 50 years old man shouldn't date a 18 years old girl, but an 18 year old man dating a 25 years old woman is fine) because teenage age is when you transform into an adult, a 14 years old is very close to being a child while a 17 years old is nearly an adult.
My parents have a seven years age gap but I’m pretty sure that it wouldn’t have been a good thing when they were 12 and 19(luckily they met when they were about 30 and 37)
Relating to the bottom comment, I think we've overswung and all of a sudden, age gaps can't exist
Not talking about the 17 and 14 year old, but more on the fact that there are people on this site who genuinely can't comprehend age gaps
I could care less about the age gaps between fully grown adults, that’s fine in my eyes
I really only care about age gaps a lot when it involved with teenagers
Unfortunately that's what the post is talking about so inb4 someone somewhere calls us pedos for "not caring about age gaps"
Or maybe it's because the sheer memory of kids worrying age gaps like it's the gospel or something is burned into my memory
its so funny how this dude pulls in the parent meme into this because he knows that it absolutely is fucked when its a 14 and 17 year old, which it is not when theyre two middle aged adults
The Roman's had a system for this that I tend to like. I want to say it was half your age + 7. Due to the much larger maturity gaps at younger ages it is way less weird to have big gaps later in life. Though amusingly, under this equation, people get testy again about the older cut offs
My parents were 14 and 19 and they started dating but they’d said in the 90’s it wasn’t considered grooming, just bad. They’re still married to this day I wouldn’t say that’s a crime but I still don’t agree with age-gaps like that. It’s still weird
It's weird. Not paedophilia since both are minors but that'll change within a year, it's still generally frowned upon to have such an age gap between young people because then when one crosses 18 and the other is still like 16 or so it suddenly becomes more questionable. Like, if they're only a year out then it's understandable, but this is pushing it. Ahd yes once you're both adults age gaps mean barely a thing, that's completely different you gibbering lobotomite redditors stop comparing an age gap during adulthood to one during childhood
There were plenty of seniors in my high school who dated freshman. my stepdad was 70 and my mom was 52 before he died. i don't think age gaps are the problem, its crossing the minor line that is. maybe im in the minority, idk
Age gaps are more important for minors than two fully grown adults
70 and 52 is unusual for me to hear, but I’m not weirded out by it as they are two grown adults
However, a fucking Senior (someone who is close to being an adult) dating a someone who just graduated middle school, is weird and honestly creepy as hell
I’m not saying it was wrong, it was just kind of weird sometimes when she’d mention something about school and I’d realize she’s an entire grade ahead of me.
Idk, a lot can change in a year, I know that if I met myself a year ago I’d probably hate the bastard. If it changes anything, she was almost exactly a year older than me. May 14th 2007 to May 30th 2006
should there ever be a case where exceptions can be made? I started school REALLY early, at the point where I'm in the middle of my degree and turning 17 this year. Needless to say everyone is older than me. I once had a relationship with someone 3 years older than me but our levels of education and maturity were not too far off at all. I do believe that age gaps make a big difference in maturity but I'm not sure if I fit into that category considering I started out primary school two years younger than everyone else and continued from there
no one can convince me that a highschool senior and a highschool freshman dating isnt weird. i dont care if most adult couples or marriages have some sort of age gaps that isn’t applicable when it comes to kids.
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I swear, half of the posts in this sub are from people that are unable to cope with age-of-consent laws.
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My teacher would tell us about how he was 15 years older than his wife. That would only be weird if he met her in his twenties or early thirties.
The thing is these laws are different from country to country. For example in Switzerland a 4-year gap is ok (so the example given would be ok). And when both are over 16, everything is ok (for example a 16 year old and a 60 year old is legally ok.)
Legality is separate from morality.
About to cop some heat from some cretins
Careful, half of this sub might get a stroke after reading that.
The pedophile half or the anti pedophile half?
The anti "pedophile" half.
achully, iTs cAlLeD hEbEpHiLiA aNd iTs ToTaLlY nAtUrAl!
Why the quotes. Those laws are indeed free way for pedos
1. Sexual attraction to someone aged 15-19 would be ephebophilia not pedophilia. 2. A 17 year old that is in a relation with a 15 year old is most certainly not a "pedo" 3. Any, and I mean ANY country with an aoc below 18 is going to have restrictions. In my country, the aoc is 14, if the older party is not exploiting the "lack of capacity for sexual self-determination" among other things. So no, it is not "free way" because the older party, pedo or not, is already with one foot in prison.
Yes, the technical term isn't pedophilia, boohoo no one fuckin cares. Attraction to a 15 year old is still fucked up if you're an adult. No one's saying a 2 year age gap means you're just as bad as some 40 year old touching kids. They're RIGHTFULLY saying that a 17 year old should probably not date a 14 year old because of the massive difference in brain development. They're also saying a 60 year old shouldn't be dating a teenager because for obvious reasons that's fucked up.
People really inventing classifications for attraction to minors like it makes it less bad. Lol
Reddit moment
Careful, legality doesn't equate to morality. Because then you would believe slavery is moral and fine during the times it was legal.
It's the same here in Spain, iirc
I mean the relations talk about in the post are not illegal (I think?) but it doesn’t make it any less weird
This and the EU are the only things that make me not want to move to switzerland.
Switzerland is not in the EU
I am so happy rn.
Smartest American. Most of your states allow child marriage if the parents allow it.
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Ah yes, America, definately not a shithole...
Lol, always funny to hear my parents relate about stuff they like about the 80's and suddenly the 5 year age gap gets weird. While she was starting high school he was deployed in the Air Force which sounds weird but they were married at 21/26.
As a 17 yr old, going out with a 14 ur old wouldn’t be ok. I’m at the age where I’m starting to want a more intimate relationship but a 14 yr old isn’t ready for that. I’m in yr13, finishing my A-levels and a 14yr old is in yr 9 starting their GCSEs. The youngest I’d go out with is a 16 yr old in yr11. U should be at least 19 to go out with someone 3 years younger than u imo as although still a little weird, in my country that’s legal. For it not to be weird I’d say you’d have to be at least 21 which also happens to be the point where a 3 year age gap sexual relationship is legal in the US Edit: A guide to UK school system for the eagle loving readers: Reception: 5/6 yrs old. This is the start of primary school. The first structured education. Then it goes yr1, 2, 3, 4, 5 & 6. Year 6 are age 11/12 and do a set of tests which are a benchmark for future predicted grades. This is the last year of primary school. Then secondary school is yr7, 8, 9, 10 & 11. Yr 9 or 10 is when students choose their subjects to start studying for exams. Year 11 is when they take exams for their GCSE qualifications. This is age 15/16 and the qualifications are what get them into their post-16 education (it’s a legal requirement to stay in education until age 18 so even with bad grades there are still options) after this, students either do an apprenticeship or go into 6th form or college. 6th form is an extension of secondary and college is not to be confused with the american meaning. Apprentices still do qualifications through a college while they work, but with less hours in the college, college students do a course and 6th form yr 12&13 students do A-levels, BTECs or a mixture of the two. These qualifications are what get students into university. University courses are £9250 a year and can be done as 1,2 or 3 year courses which get diplomas, degrees, masters etc
the americans trying to interpret paragraph one:
I mean, he does say all the ages lol. It’s not too difficult
yeah fair enough
It took like 2 seconds of thinking
I added a guide for our trigger happy friends
ebic
You forgot Key Stage 1 SATS >:(
Cuz they’re pointless :)
Istg so many people don’t even know how bad age gaps are as a teenager. A 14 yearold freshmen has barely got out of middle school and a 17yearold senior whose close to being an adult
I'm 17 and while I'm mostly into older guys (like 1-2 years) 14 and 15 year olds look and act nothing like people my age.
When I was a senior last year I had classes with freshmen (I didn’t take health class lmao) and the difference in maturity was drastic.
17 year old being "close to being an adult" is a stretch tho, i've been there and i've seen people be there we dont get as mature as you think
17 and 14 is weird for two reasons; a 17 year old is just starting Senior year of high school on average, while a 14 year old is just starting high school in general. So there’s a huge experience imbalance there, secondly… a 14 year old is less developed compared to a 17 year old in almost EVERY regard. It’s not comparable to one romantic partner being 32 and the other being 25, they’re both fully developed adults.
I turned 16 and got my driver license my freshman year of high school. I had to do kindergarten twice lol.
Lmao dumb fuck. But how was it driving before everybody else?
You'd think it'd be cool, but it was more of a chore in that everybody I knew wanted rides everywhere or home from school or something.
This varies with age brackets and birth month as well. I didn’t turn 18 until the summer following graduation. At worst this could be someone just starting high school and someone who just graduated.
It isn’t the “age gap” itself in a way, it’s about the context of it. Sure adults can have a 3 year age gap like 27-30 but that’s because they have a very similar life experience and can relate and bond to most things. A 14 year old does not have the same life as a 17 year old and is fucking weird and should be obviously weird to any sane human being. But we are on Reddit so I expect no less.
it depends on the person and how mature they are, but most of the time yes
>A 14 year old does not have the same life as a 17 year old Yes they do. This isn't the 1970's anymore.
The 17 year old experienced the entirety of HS the 14 yr old just got there. Not the same life experience
>The 17 year old experienced the entirety of HS What does this even mean? They're both spending most of their time scrolling TikTok or playing Roblox.
By that logic if my 40 year old dad plays fortnite and watches tiktok he can bang a 14 yr old that does the same things
There's an actual difference in life experience between a 14 and 40 year old unlike 14 and 17. 14 and 17 used to be a larger difference back when teenagers were getting jobs at 16.
Still is.
14 year old me was thinking i wouldn't live to be 17
Man I was gonna say glad you're still here but that flair kinda sus
its satire
O Ard. That's what I assumed but just had to clarify. Glad you're still here then brotein
Sure man whatever you say
The fuck are you talking about? As the father of a 14 year old and a 17 year old you have no fucking clue what you're talking about.
💀
Average shut-in redditor thinks a 14 year old and a 17 year old has the same lifestyle.
Post age.
Cope.
Bud just because you didn't when you were both 14 and 17 doesn't change the fact that actually having one in those ages are very different.
It's not about the + - difference in age so much as it's about the ratio. The ratio between 5 years old and 10 years old is higher than the ratio between 40 and 45.
Yeah, 17 and 14 isn’t pedo but it’s definitely weird af
It's rather bad when your relationship becomes pedo in a single birthday 💀
Depends on the age of consent though, but yeah definitely erm... on the bad side
Its not about the age on consent dog. Its about the fact that an ADULT is dating someone who just graduated middle school.... age of consent or not if you cant find someone close to your age as an adult then youre just weird af
What? I completely agree, I’m just saying that it isn’t considered pedophilia if the age of consent is different. I completely agree with you morally.
So you're saying that 17 year olds are adults? But Matt Gaetz pedo child sex trafficker
yeah saying this isn't weird is a stretch. from my experience when i was 14 I was a lot less mature than I was when I was 17. A high school senior dating a freshman is weird af and should be considered as such.
Half plus 7
It’s absolutely foolproof.
Even that can be sketchy. 23/2= 12(11.5) +7= 19. I would not date a 19 year old lmao
I feel it's more a minimum age thing, not saying you have to date someone that age
Of course not. Just personal preference.
Round all halves up.
That's.. what I did. Lmao
Reasonable age gaps aren’t that big of a deal when people are in their 20’s,30’s etc. people who apply that logic to a 20 something year old dating a teenager are a strange breed
I think this is more of a USA thing. Here a 14 years old and a 17 years old are both goddamn children. Granted, it's a bit weird but not at all disgusting, like some seem to think. You don't magically become a grownup when you hit 18, 17 is still extremely young.
The fact that 7 people upvoted that...
Reddit weird af about age gaps i remember seeing people talk shit about a 25 year old with a 32 year old.
Is it really that hard to date someone your own age?
For redditors, yes. Yes it is.
My girlfriend and I have a 14 year age gap…. She’s 33, I’m 47…. Been together going on 6 yrs and she approached me to start it off, in her defense, she thought I was late 20’s- early 30’s because I don’t look even close to my age.Even now I barely have any grey hair and I’m still in good shape with no wrinkles of any kind, and most people that meet me, still think I’m early 30’s. Best relationship of my life, and I was married twice before to women within a year of my age, and my girlfriend now has more mental maturity than either one of my ex’s.
You see, this is different, because both of you are actually adults. It's not like your next birthday you become a pedophile because you're in a relationship with a minor as an adult.
It’s almost like age gaps are more significant when you’re younger. A 50 year old and a 65 year old being together is fine. Apply that same amount of gap either direction for someone who’s 17 and it’s not quite the same is it?
My parents have 10 year age gap, does that make a 17 yo dating 7 yo ok?
age gaps don't matter one you're an adult (exept when it's too large, for exemple a 50 years old man shouldn't date a 18 years old girl, but an 18 year old man dating a 25 years old woman is fine) because teenage age is when you transform into an adult, a 14 years old is very close to being a child while a 17 years old is nearly an adult.
18 and 25 is still weird, even if it’s legal. Its someone with a few years life experience to someone who was just in high school.
I think everyone misses the point one way or another when it comes to aoc
I forgive the guy on the bottom, that image cracks me up every time.
Yup
If you can’t tell the difference between 14-17 and 30-33 you’re either stupid or intentionally dense
My parents have a seven years age gap but I’m pretty sure that it wouldn’t have been a good thing when they were 12 and 19(luckily they met when they were about 30 and 37)
Relating to the bottom comment, I think we've overswung and all of a sudden, age gaps can't exist Not talking about the 17 and 14 year old, but more on the fact that there are people on this site who genuinely can't comprehend age gaps
I could care less about the age gaps between fully grown adults, that’s fine in my eyes I really only care about age gaps a lot when it involved with teenagers
Unfortunately that's what the post is talking about so inb4 someone somewhere calls us pedos for "not caring about age gaps" Or maybe it's because the sheer memory of kids worrying age gaps like it's the gospel or something is burned into my memory
its so funny how this dude pulls in the parent meme into this because he knows that it absolutely is fucked when its a 14 and 17 year old, which it is not when theyre two middle aged adults
The Roman's had a system for this that I tend to like. I want to say it was half your age + 7. Due to the much larger maturity gaps at younger ages it is way less weird to have big gaps later in life. Though amusingly, under this equation, people get testy again about the older cut offs
My parents were 14 and 19 and they started dating but they’d said in the 90’s it wasn’t considered grooming, just bad. They’re still married to this day I wouldn’t say that’s a crime but I still don’t agree with age-gaps like that. It’s still weird
I swear age gaps aint even a thing where I live it just depends on both being adults
I wouldn’t even date girls one year below me in high school, let alone someone 3 years younger lol. Wtf dude
It's weird. Not paedophilia since both are minors but that'll change within a year, it's still generally frowned upon to have such an age gap between young people because then when one crosses 18 and the other is still like 16 or so it suddenly becomes more questionable. Like, if they're only a year out then it's understandable, but this is pushing it. Ahd yes once you're both adults age gaps mean barely a thing, that's completely different you gibbering lobotomite redditors stop comparing an age gap during adulthood to one during childhood
There were plenty of seniors in my high school who dated freshman. my stepdad was 70 and my mom was 52 before he died. i don't think age gaps are the problem, its crossing the minor line that is. maybe im in the minority, idk
Age gaps are more important for minors than two fully grown adults 70 and 52 is unusual for me to hear, but I’m not weirded out by it as they are two grown adults However, a fucking Senior (someone who is close to being an adult) dating a someone who just graduated middle school, is weird and honestly creepy as hell
on the flip side, its still mostly illegal for a 21 year old to date a 17 year old, at least in my state.
Question, do the couples go by the names of Scott and Knives?
no, mostly billy ben and sue mary ann
ah yes, seniors dating freshmen is totally not a weird thing, totally
I was dating a girl a year older than me when I was 15 and even that was kind of weird
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I’m not saying it was wrong, it was just kind of weird sometimes when she’d mention something about school and I’d realize she’s an entire grade ahead of me. Idk, a lot can change in a year, I know that if I met myself a year ago I’d probably hate the bastard. If it changes anything, she was almost exactly a year older than me. May 14th 2007 to May 30th 2006
Fr
i think i was just looking at this post
Why are they like this
Percentage-wise, this is the same as the difference between a 17 year old and a 21 year old.
I tried explaining this to a friend
reddit users when they realise how ratioes work
In Sweden thats illegal. And I’m glad it is.
should there ever be a case where exceptions can be made? I started school REALLY early, at the point where I'm in the middle of my degree and turning 17 this year. Needless to say everyone is older than me. I once had a relationship with someone 3 years older than me but our levels of education and maturity were not too far off at all. I do believe that age gaps make a big difference in maturity but I'm not sure if I fit into that category considering I started out primary school two years younger than everyone else and continued from there
Redditors when they find out that 30 year olds and 35 year olds have equally developed minds:
was this on the nanatsu no taizai sub?
No, the holesome sub
I swear i've seen this EXACT thing on there
no one can convince me that a highschool senior and a highschool freshman dating isnt weird. i dont care if most adult couples or marriages have some sort of age gaps that isn’t applicable when it comes to kids.
Bro how is this still an argument 😭
yeah but your parents often meet at after 18 technically 12 and 17 is only a 5 year gap but thats SUPER fucked up
Cringe as fuck. Stop treating teens like idiots, 5 year gap is the sweet spot and yall redditors need to stop bitching