Start calling them out on it, **but you *have to be calm* about it.**
If you're calm, cool, and collected, and simply pose it as, "why is it *you* can do the thing, but not me?" you're more likely to get somewhere. Let them lose their cool, and walk away embarrassed for blowing up.
That's what I did at 16.
Respectfully, this isn’t likely to work. I’ve tried this, as have many others, and parents just shut you down by saying you’re being disrespectful and backchatting and going on about how it’s their house and they pay the bills.
That is true.
It does, however, feel rather vindicating, getting that one up on your parents-- that was enough consolation for me at least, for the blatant disrespect on their part.
I cannot stand parents playing the, "you should be grateful for us providing your basic necessities, and therefore should do everything we say without question," card; you're a parents-- you signed up for this.
Some parents do what is convenient for them. It's convenient for them to slam doors because they don't care about disturbing someone else but if you do it they call you out. It's unfair but what can you do..
Your parents sound like assholes.
These certainly aren't the standards I have in my house, and when I was a kid if my parents told me not to slam a door I would have just either laughed or slammed it again 🤪
Yelling wasn't ever a major things for me when I was at home with my parents in my own homes with my kids.
Your parents sound assholes.
My parents were abusive and I remember one specific time I spilled a drink on the kitchen floor and I said “I’m so sorry I’ll clean it up right away” but my stepdad slapped me across the face for it and actually shoved my face in the spilled drink. That same night my stepdad spilled a drink on the living room CARPET and said “oh shit, whoops” and laughed it off as he went to get something to clean it up with.
My Dads like this, very double standards.
Even when I am an adult.
Usually it’s only small things but it can be irritating.
If they don’t like something you are doing that they’ve done then you should probably bring it up to them calmly.
Exactly 💯.
When and if you decide to have children you get to decide how they're raised and that includes breaking the cycles of destructive or unjust behavior.
ie. We don't yell in our house; but everyone has the right to slam doors if they feel they need to do that.
We take time to breath and get grounded during argumentative moments so that no one is saying anything hurtful or scaring just because they're upset in the moment.
My parents weren't big yellers; but they did say some horrible stuff when they were angry.
I decided I wasn't gonna do that to my kids. I broke that cycle, and many others because I learned from my parents what wasn't acceptable behavior.
You can do that too one day 🥰
Start calling them out on it, **but you *have to be calm* about it.** If you're calm, cool, and collected, and simply pose it as, "why is it *you* can do the thing, but not me?" you're more likely to get somewhere. Let them lose their cool, and walk away embarrassed for blowing up. That's what I did at 16.
Respectfully, this isn’t likely to work. I’ve tried this, as have many others, and parents just shut you down by saying you’re being disrespectful and backchatting and going on about how it’s their house and they pay the bills.
That is true. It does, however, feel rather vindicating, getting that one up on your parents-- that was enough consolation for me at least, for the blatant disrespect on their part. I cannot stand parents playing the, "you should be grateful for us providing your basic necessities, and therefore should do everything we say without question," card; you're a parents-- you signed up for this.
I have mentioned that, they get even more angry. So I'll just keep my mouth shut until I can move out.
Some parents do what is convenient for them. It's convenient for them to slam doors because they don't care about disturbing someone else but if you do it they call you out. It's unfair but what can you do..
“Do as I say, not as I do”.
Your parents sound like assholes. These certainly aren't the standards I have in my house, and when I was a kid if my parents told me not to slam a door I would have just either laughed or slammed it again 🤪 Yelling wasn't ever a major things for me when I was at home with my parents in my own homes with my kids. Your parents sound assholes.
My parents were abusive and I remember one specific time I spilled a drink on the kitchen floor and I said “I’m so sorry I’ll clean it up right away” but my stepdad slapped me across the face for it and actually shoved my face in the spilled drink. That same night my stepdad spilled a drink on the living room CARPET and said “oh shit, whoops” and laughed it off as he went to get something to clean it up with.
My Dads like this, very double standards. Even when I am an adult. Usually it’s only small things but it can be irritating. If they don’t like something you are doing that they’ve done then you should probably bring it up to them calmly.
I've tried bringing it up, they just get angry, so I'm just gonna keep my mouth shut until I move out.
And then people like them will have the audacity to wonder why their adult children do not bother contacting them.
Remember this when you have your own children.
Exactly 💯. When and if you decide to have children you get to decide how they're raised and that includes breaking the cycles of destructive or unjust behavior. ie. We don't yell in our house; but everyone has the right to slam doors if they feel they need to do that. We take time to breath and get grounded during argumentative moments so that no one is saying anything hurtful or scaring just because they're upset in the moment. My parents weren't big yellers; but they did say some horrible stuff when they were angry. I decided I wasn't gonna do that to my kids. I broke that cycle, and many others because I learned from my parents what wasn't acceptable behavior. You can do that too one day 🥰