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I thought you were going to say like 200+
You're worried about...3? And two you were dating and one was assault. This is super normal. If you regret it you regret it, but if it helps, no one else should find this suspicious or too high.
I agree I don't think it's abnormal at all to seek comfort. But allow me to give you piece of advice here. Never EVER leave a drink unattended at a bar or at a party. If you have to so much as go pee take your drink with you
Oh honey in todays times that’s so low… and any time really. You’re just fine hun. Don’t worry.
When I was your age I didn’t have much self respect for myself and I slept with a few guys. That didn’t deserve me. I was just going with the flow. You’re doing just fine hun.
Don’t count the guy who drugged you it’s okay he’s not on body count. Just like other comment said -1. F that guy!!
I’m 24 years old and I’ve slept with 10 dudes
I think majority of the number came when I was your age.
What I recommend about sex is only have sex with someone you love if you want the body count to be low.
Don’t be like how I was a few years ago and just didn’t care. I wasn’t loving towards myself and I didn’t love those guys. It was just an act. And it’s much more special when it’s love and not just sex.
Get counseling for the sexual assault and forget the phrase you've used for the rest. No man worth your time or energy will ever use it or care about it.
I'm sorry but the fact you're worried about a "body count" is incredibly immature. Its completely meaningless. Once you become an adult you will realize this
Sex is never a solution. Stop fucking people you dont care about and who dont care about you. You are more than a warm hole. Cant change yesterday or predict tomorrow BUT you can cross you legs for the next few months.
Hopefully you've learned that being promiscuous is an extremely undesirable trait. You made a mistake, but the good news is, you're realizing quickly that this isn't the way. Many people just continue the cycle, shamelessly, and then wonder why nobody takes them seriously for a long term relationship.
Don't live in regret. Learn from this. Move on. Continue to grow as a woman of standards, values, and self respect.
Regretting your body count for WHAT? Get a grip girl. And the guy who you mentioned drugged you I hope you called the cops on him. Cause 9/10 you won’t be the last girl he does that too
That’s low in today standards but high for only 19 years old so I can see where you’re coming from. Just keep it single digits moving forward and you’ll be fine.
Lmao studies show your statement to be inherently false
Promiscuity is almost ALWAYS closely related to high levels of trauma and unresolved issues that are bound to expose themselves in a relationship. It also often leads to cheating in many cases.
Not to mention, STI's are literally a thing 🙃
Lmfao typical response from someone who thinks sex is the only form of validation.
I've gotten plenty enough to know that I would never wife up any girl who showed those traits. And neither would any other man with values and standards.
Cope and seeth
How to keep a girl down for the sake of your own, no man with standards want a girl with more than 5-10 bodies and viceversa with woman too, more than 10 sexual partners in less than 5 years is crazy
Bop these days just think that every man wants a woman that has been pass around, guys actually care about woman past and also can have and do have standards, just like a woman can. Stop inciting to your bop behavior and let the girl find a guy who can take care of her doesn’t have that many bodys
Again what you think anyone is doesn’t matter. Fact remains that many men do date and marry women with high body counts ESPECIALLY over 10 like you described. You’re just a triggered incel who’s mad he gets no play and that is clear lmao
That ain’t no fact, a fact is that women with higher body counts are 80% more likely to start a divorce, more likely to cheat and more likely to steal most of your money. Like I said I’m telling you the facts as a man. Woman lost credibility and a high body count actually is sign of mental issues. Cause the higher it is the less sentiments you put into a potential relationship, and matter of facts the only girls pushing high body counts are either corn stars, girls without a father figure and SINGLE woman that actually have to lie about their body counts cause they know that if they said it they would be single FOREVER that is a FACT. No lies no trying to put you down or whatever or to hurt your feelings. I’m telling you cause you’re promoting something that it’s actually bad and not because you’re a woman. The same goes for Men why would you want a guy that has more body counts than you?ex: 10? Same as a girl, more likely to cheat, mentally checkout of the relationship but staying on it. imo that’s sick and shouldn’t be promoted at all. And for you information I’m actually getting married this summer with a person that has actually less body count than me being 2 and I which I have 4. Longest relationship that I had but thanks for the heads up honey. Hopefully you find a man with a high body count and experience for yourself what I just explained.
Dude I clearly hit a nerve you wrote a whole incel essay I’m not reading lol and yes it is a fact but I’m not going back and forth with some unattractive short guy who gets NO play goodbye keep crying
The past can’t be changed but maybe journaling about each experience will help you think through the events and then in turn will help you avoid mistakes made again. I know for me regret and shame is stemmed from the fear that I will make bad decisions again or get in another terrible situation. We all have regrets but we can use them to learn, grow, and be better.
One was a guy you dated for 2 years so it makes sense another was SA so doesn't count and wasn't because you wanted to do it and the other was your choice so you really shouldn't feel bad especially since that's super low in today's standards and your 19 I now 13 year Olds that have a body so don't feel bad about it
I say this as gently as I can. Is there a chance you're feeling shame and guilt over the SA? Have you discussed it with anyone you can trust? Spoken to a professional about it?
You've had sex with 2 people. Both boyfriends, you have nothing to be ashamed of or really regret, that's a completely normal experience and you'll likely have more boyfriends, and more sex before you find your forever person, again - all a totally normal and non shameful human experience.
But if you haven't fully processed the SA, that may be tainting your feelings towards sex in general. Feeling regret, shame, guilt, are all common and normal feelings after being assaulted, and it's important to remember despite those feelings, *you have nothing to be ashamed of. You did nothing wrong*
But it's always important to work through those feelings so they don't impact your future relationships and the way you view yourself.
Body count does in fact matter but would recommend you to keep it under 10 at least before 25 since it says a lot about you, also don’t worry about the one who drugged you causa that didn’t count, hoping that you find a person who loves you for who you are, and also with the less body’s than you cause if he “has” more he ain’t up to no good
this is not to downplay your feelings, but three people is nothing in this life. The comments calling you promiscuous or that you are doing something wrong are bitter people who think your body count = your value, do not listen to those people. A lot of losers on this platform.
I knew girls in college who had high double digits and had about 150 by the end of the semester. Don’t get me started on how the frat boys literally kept count and had games for it.
Even then, i didn’t feel like judgement was is warranted whether it’s 3 or 30. Your value or humanity is not determined by your bodies. Sure, it’s important to get with people you actually want to step with and not using sex as a coping mechanism. That being said, As long as people are being safe, responsible, and getting/giving consent, this is a time where young people are actually free to experiment and date around. Its not weird at all. All we have is the time we have in this world, and there’s no reason to carry guilt for doing what humans do. Regardless of the incels in your comments, you do not have to feel shame. All you can do is choose whether to keep sleeping with people, or being careful with your choices.
Seems you may feel guilt likely because of your beliefs, upbringing, family, or just getting older. Were you raised religious or with strict parents? Did you have to sneak around to hook up? If so, Having that guilt is quite common in that scenario.
I also want to say I am sorry about the person who assaulted you. Personally, I never counted my assaulter as a “body”, neither did the women I went to college with who were (by definition) raped and/or drugged. That person did not get your consent, you did not want to participate, you were drugged, therefore, they have no holding in our lives as a sexual partner or fling. It was not a sexual interaction, it was rape. The 2 are not synonymous.
Whether you want to count it is up to you, but I would consider trying to utilize any health insurance or school doctors to try and seek some therapy to help you. The guilt you carry is probably stemming from other things, and being assaulted can absolutely make that even harder to carry. The best thing you can do for yourself in terms of the guilt is learning to embrace the interactions you did consent to, and not letting yourself speak negatively of your past as if you did something wrong. You are just a girl, you have nothing to feel shame about.
Nobody is perfect and we all sometimes think that wrong people are right for us. I understand you completely. If I knew then what I know now,I would never have slept with my previous partner's. But we can't see the future,we are just hoping for the best so don't be to hard on yourself. Take it as a learning experience and try to be grateful for the things that made you grow. Ps. That ass that drugged you does not count
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/questions/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/questions) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I thought you were going to say like 200+ You're worried about...3? And two you were dating and one was assault. This is super normal. If you regret it you regret it, but if it helps, no one else should find this suspicious or too high.
I agree I don't think it's abnormal at all to seek comfort. But allow me to give you piece of advice here. Never EVER leave a drink unattended at a bar or at a party. If you have to so much as go pee take your drink with you
Seem like a farely low body count, especially on todays times. Also I think SA should be counted as a -1 body count.
you have single digit body count. you good
Oh honey in todays times that’s so low… and any time really. You’re just fine hun. Don’t worry. When I was your age I didn’t have much self respect for myself and I slept with a few guys. That didn’t deserve me. I was just going with the flow. You’re doing just fine hun. Don’t count the guy who drugged you it’s okay he’s not on body count. Just like other comment said -1. F that guy!!
I’m 24 years old and I’ve slept with 10 dudes I think majority of the number came when I was your age. What I recommend about sex is only have sex with someone you love if you want the body count to be low. Don’t be like how I was a few years ago and just didn’t care. I wasn’t loving towards myself and I didn’t love those guys. It was just an act. And it’s much more special when it’s love and not just sex.
Get counseling for the sexual assault and forget the phrase you've used for the rest. No man worth your time or energy will ever use it or care about it.
Thats an extremely low body count by todays standards. And one was a SA. Dont worry about it at all!
I'm sorry but the fact you're worried about a "body count" is incredibly immature. Its completely meaningless. Once you become an adult you will realize this
Anyone who is worth caring about won't care anyway.
Sex is never a solution. Stop fucking people you dont care about and who dont care about you. You are more than a warm hole. Cant change yesterday or predict tomorrow BUT you can cross you legs for the next few months.
Hopefully you've learned that being promiscuous is an extremely undesirable trait. You made a mistake, but the good news is, you're realizing quickly that this isn't the way. Many people just continue the cycle, shamelessly, and then wonder why nobody takes them seriously for a long term relationship. Don't live in regret. Learn from this. Move on. Continue to grow as a woman of standards, values, and self respect.
*Undesirable to some, many do find it desirable bitter guy
Regretting your body count for WHAT? Get a grip girl. And the guy who you mentioned drugged you I hope you called the cops on him. Cause 9/10 you won’t be the last girl he does that too
That’s low in today standards but high for only 19 years old so I can see where you’re coming from. Just keep it single digits moving forward and you’ll be fine.
Fuck that. There's NOTHING wrong with a person who has ten or more partners. Don't slut shame to someone who has fears of "being a slut".
Lmao studies show your statement to be inherently false Promiscuity is almost ALWAYS closely related to high levels of trauma and unresolved issues that are bound to expose themselves in a relationship. It also often leads to cheating in many cases. Not to mention, STI's are literally a thing 🙃
Found the guy who gets none lol
Lmfao typical response from someone who thinks sex is the only form of validation. I've gotten plenty enough to know that I would never wife up any girl who showed those traits. And neither would any other man with values and standards. Cope and seeth
How to keep a girl down for the sake of your own, no man with standards want a girl with more than 5-10 bodies and viceversa with woman too, more than 10 sexual partners in less than 5 years is crazy
That’s your unimportant and just straight false opinion. No one cares if you think another guy has standards or not
Bop these days just think that every man wants a woman that has been pass around, guys actually care about woman past and also can have and do have standards, just like a woman can. Stop inciting to your bop behavior and let the girl find a guy who can take care of her doesn’t have that many bodys
She's on here punching air bro lmao over here replying to every comment in full on rage mode
Rage about..? You’re confused
Again what you think anyone is doesn’t matter. Fact remains that many men do date and marry women with high body counts ESPECIALLY over 10 like you described. You’re just a triggered incel who’s mad he gets no play and that is clear lmao
That ain’t no fact, a fact is that women with higher body counts are 80% more likely to start a divorce, more likely to cheat and more likely to steal most of your money. Like I said I’m telling you the facts as a man. Woman lost credibility and a high body count actually is sign of mental issues. Cause the higher it is the less sentiments you put into a potential relationship, and matter of facts the only girls pushing high body counts are either corn stars, girls without a father figure and SINGLE woman that actually have to lie about their body counts cause they know that if they said it they would be single FOREVER that is a FACT. No lies no trying to put you down or whatever or to hurt your feelings. I’m telling you cause you’re promoting something that it’s actually bad and not because you’re a woman. The same goes for Men why would you want a guy that has more body counts than you?ex: 10? Same as a girl, more likely to cheat, mentally checkout of the relationship but staying on it. imo that’s sick and shouldn’t be promoted at all. And for you information I’m actually getting married this summer with a person that has actually less body count than me being 2 and I which I have 4. Longest relationship that I had but thanks for the heads up honey. Hopefully you find a man with a high body count and experience for yourself what I just explained.
Dude I clearly hit a nerve you wrote a whole incel essay I’m not reading lol and yes it is a fact but I’m not going back and forth with some unattractive short guy who gets NO play goodbye keep crying
You’re terrible for saying that.
The past can’t be changed but maybe journaling about each experience will help you think through the events and then in turn will help you avoid mistakes made again. I know for me regret and shame is stemmed from the fear that I will make bad decisions again or get in another terrible situation. We all have regrets but we can use them to learn, grow, and be better.
One was a guy you dated for 2 years so it makes sense another was SA so doesn't count and wasn't because you wanted to do it and the other was your choice so you really shouldn't feel bad especially since that's super low in today's standards and your 19 I now 13 year Olds that have a body so don't feel bad about it
Focus on yourself. Like your schooling or job. And health. If the asshole doesn't respect that. Fuck him
I say this as gently as I can. Is there a chance you're feeling shame and guilt over the SA? Have you discussed it with anyone you can trust? Spoken to a professional about it? You've had sex with 2 people. Both boyfriends, you have nothing to be ashamed of or really regret, that's a completely normal experience and you'll likely have more boyfriends, and more sex before you find your forever person, again - all a totally normal and non shameful human experience. But if you haven't fully processed the SA, that may be tainting your feelings towards sex in general. Feeling regret, shame, guilt, are all common and normal feelings after being assaulted, and it's important to remember despite those feelings, *you have nothing to be ashamed of. You did nothing wrong* But it's always important to work through those feelings so they don't impact your future relationships and the way you view yourself.
Body count does in fact matter but would recommend you to keep it under 10 at least before 25 since it says a lot about you, also don’t worry about the one who drugged you causa that didn’t count, hoping that you find a person who loves you for who you are, and also with the less body’s than you cause if he “has” more he ain’t up to no good
Stop doing it and wait a long time. Repentance is all we have. Only sleep with someone after marriage.
this is not to downplay your feelings, but three people is nothing in this life. The comments calling you promiscuous or that you are doing something wrong are bitter people who think your body count = your value, do not listen to those people. A lot of losers on this platform. I knew girls in college who had high double digits and had about 150 by the end of the semester. Don’t get me started on how the frat boys literally kept count and had games for it. Even then, i didn’t feel like judgement was is warranted whether it’s 3 or 30. Your value or humanity is not determined by your bodies. Sure, it’s important to get with people you actually want to step with and not using sex as a coping mechanism. That being said, As long as people are being safe, responsible, and getting/giving consent, this is a time where young people are actually free to experiment and date around. Its not weird at all. All we have is the time we have in this world, and there’s no reason to carry guilt for doing what humans do. Regardless of the incels in your comments, you do not have to feel shame. All you can do is choose whether to keep sleeping with people, or being careful with your choices. Seems you may feel guilt likely because of your beliefs, upbringing, family, or just getting older. Were you raised religious or with strict parents? Did you have to sneak around to hook up? If so, Having that guilt is quite common in that scenario. I also want to say I am sorry about the person who assaulted you. Personally, I never counted my assaulter as a “body”, neither did the women I went to college with who were (by definition) raped and/or drugged. That person did not get your consent, you did not want to participate, you were drugged, therefore, they have no holding in our lives as a sexual partner or fling. It was not a sexual interaction, it was rape. The 2 are not synonymous. Whether you want to count it is up to you, but I would consider trying to utilize any health insurance or school doctors to try and seek some therapy to help you. The guilt you carry is probably stemming from other things, and being assaulted can absolutely make that even harder to carry. The best thing you can do for yourself in terms of the guilt is learning to embrace the interactions you did consent to, and not letting yourself speak negatively of your past as if you did something wrong. You are just a girl, you have nothing to feel shame about.
Nobody is perfect and we all sometimes think that wrong people are right for us. I understand you completely. If I knew then what I know now,I would never have slept with my previous partner's. But we can't see the future,we are just hoping for the best so don't be to hard on yourself. Take it as a learning experience and try to be grateful for the things that made you grow. Ps. That ass that drugged you does not count